Yeah, definitely. I am focusing on my friendships with other women, other brothers and sisters in Christ, on reading books (just joined a book club), figuring myself out in my career (pray for me, i'm looking for work again! It's rough out in these streets hah)
I am married so maybe I should leave the comments to my single friends. However, I want to encourage you all to enjoy being single and truly get to know and understand who you are and what you are looking for in a partner and marriage. I will say one of the best advice I have heard is that " you should find a partner (man) with whoms vision and mission you can align yourself with. I however heard this in my 10th year of marriage........lol. If you think being single is hard try being married and lonely or being married and feeling unequally yoked and incompatible or being married and disconnected. At that juncture you will be worst off than if you were alone and even worst ...... if you have children. Best of luck to you hon, great video and to all the single people who may read this........marriage is beautiful but you have to work on you and find someone you are compatible with. Don't settle and don't compromise.
I entertained guys that I knew were never going to be an option for me. I overshared my feelings, beliefs and struggles with them as if they were a therapist! I never went too far with them physically which was great! But now there are half a dozen men walking by around knowing just too much about me which is still unsettling, because they didn’t earn/need the personal information I gave them.
That's what I'm feeling right now about 2 guys It makes me really inconfortable but I'm also glad because from their reaction when I told them my story I knew immediately they were not the right person for me ( being judged is definitely not what I expect from my partner)
Something I've learned is that you can embrace your single season, but still have moments of desire. I used to feel like I had to be ok being single 24/7.I felt like anytime I felt discontent, I wasn't embracing my singleness. There was honestly a time where I was so busy that I wasn't thinking of my singleness, but this year, God has created more space for stillness. I do know that God places those desires in our hearts for a reason. I've learned not to drown the desires out, but to embrace them...don't sulk about them, but find ways to be intentional about other relationships and how to serve others in the meantime.
For me, a mistake that I need to stop doing is being impatient and trying to “find the one” on my own. I just need to trust the Lord. I hope you can keep me in your prayers.
I’m 25 and have only been in one situationship🥴. I’m learning more and more to trust in God’s timing but I have definitely fallen into the mistake of thinking something is wrong with me. Also I’ve made the mistake (still working on this one) of thinking that because I wasn’t all the way sexually pure and went back at one point that this is my punishment. I understand that sin does have its consequences but I also have to trust that if marriage is part of God’s plan for my life it WILL happen. My joy is in Him not in whether or not I end up getting married.
Believe it or not, that’s actually theologically accurate. That being said, there may be times our flesh may desperately desire for partnership, but our spirit knows that God is actually who we need ultimately. It may be a constant war, but we’re called to be overcomes. As a man, I’m encouraged by your comment. God bless.
Im learning this now-- seeing how i went from relationship to relationship hoping and "pretending" his is the one.. -- I made decisions to this day it is hard for me to forgive myself for-- but God does have a plan-- and I am now just trying to find peace and comfort in solely him-- Thanks for writing.
I relapsed on my celibacy journey recently over vacation. I learned that I wasn't yet strong enough to test the waters and solidified that I need Christian friends on a similar path in my life.
I was in a similar boat 3 years ago. The guilt was not a joke. Losing the Holy Spirit was the saddest part of it. I won’t do it again. I’m here for you.
@Tiffany Addo Hey there, this was a random video on my feed, and I decided to watch through to see what a Christian’s perspective on this was, and if it was in line with scripture. I’m glad you responded out of love but I’m curious to know one thing from your comment. And that is, do you believe that genuine believers, who were part of the vine, having received the Holy Spirit, but still struggle with sexual sins, can actually loose their salvation?
@@InDaClub12 You feel it. That feeling is unexplainable. It's worse than your first heartbreak. I will never go back. The amount of Grace , fasting, praying, consecration it takes to even get a fraction for what you had before... it's unexplainable. The protection you had on your life is gone. You don't want that to happen. This walk is not easy. It's all or nothing. Also know that the fruit (s) of the spirit is a person. The Holy Spirit is a person. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit because the Holy Spirit is a person. Grace, mercy, favor, wisdom, might, understanding are all persons. Just like you wouldn't want to make your love one angry same thing with the Holy Spirit. Some Scriptures Revelations 21:8 ( the entire book tells you what happens when the Holy Spirit departs) 1 thesolonians 5:19 Hebrew 11:6 2 kings 1: 1-18 Ephesians 4:30 1 Peter 1:16 John 3:3 Judges 16:20. Gal 5:22-23 Leviticus 19:31 1 John 2 1 Samuel 16:14 Gal 5:4 1 Sam 15:10-19 Rom 14:17 Titus 3:5 Hebrews 10:28-29 1 cor 12 Examples When Abraham picked up Lot to go to the promise land. Abraham did not hear from God until lot left. Samson King Saul Solomon (when he became a priest) When Israel sinned and God sent them into captivity.
I’m 24 and waiting till marriage and I really really needed this😭 I have an aunt who, although she means well, is constantly trying to push me into settling down and always wondering why I’m still Single. She’s always telling me that time is running out which I believe that but I don’t want to rush anything. My relationship with God isn’t even where I want it to be yet and I really want to discover my purpose and establish myself and who I am first. The comparison thing hit hard, especially with social media. To be honest I love being single but i do have my moments of sadness Whenever I see happy couples or am getting pressured to settle down already😩 I loved the fifth one because That’s exactly what I tell people all the time: you’re gonna be married forever why not just enjoy the few years when it’s just you and God. Lol sorry that was long but I really needed to hear this advice Big sis. Thank you♥️♥️♥️♥️
I've had a relationship of 5 years and God told me that I needed to leave this person. So that's what I did. (And wow I've received blessings upon blessings) It wasn't easy but after that, God showed me why I needed to leave this relationship. It wasn't just one reason but there were so many. And I am so grateful that He told me to leave this relationship. Not only was it very toxic but I also wasn't ready to be in a relationship. I am definitely embracing my single season. I am healing, learning to love myself & also learning who I am in Christ. God is good 💕
I have a desire for marriage but I am enjoying this single season before entering into "forever." I love when you mentioned not making someone your "God"or idolizing a relationship. I had to learn that the hard way.
I just had to say you are absolutely beautiful! I was scrolling through the comments and I found your YT. Honestly seeing your UA-cam gave me some inspiration/ encouragement to keep on with my channel. God bless you ❤️
@Executing His Plan I'm serious. My sisters are asking me if I'm ok? Do guys ask me out? They are concerned. But in this season of my life I noticed how the world attached ones happiness to a relationship.
Same here everyone married and starting a family or both. I’m the only one whose single. I’m still trying to be encouraged and enjoy my single season but it do gets hard.
Often times we see our singleness as a prison because everyone else around us is in a relationship & because of this we can fall for the counterfeit & see them as bail or a way out but singleness is a season to get to know yourself through God and whenever the right person comes along it's a addition to your joy that you already have ❤ They don't complete you but they compliment you.
Whew, this is so good Sis. I have learned that I cannot rush God. I find myself saying “God, I’m 28, getting older.” Then I remember, I literally serve the Father of Time. Everything in God’s timing. I also heard that God will not bless you with an idol so I try to make sure I don’t idolize marriage and spending time wishing my Single season away thinking everything will be fixed once I’m married. Praying for myself and fellow sisters!
I think the mistakes I made or am making - feeling inadequate or something is wrong with me -entertaining guys I shouldn't do and not sticking to my boundaries - thinking I need to help God -watching to many videos on relationships (hahah) - thinking marriage is the goal or a reward for good behavior -crying and wanting something I don't have instead of focusing on all the great things I do have and what God is currently doing, yall I'm so ungrateful sometimes, -forgetting that I am already in a covenant relationship with Jesus, and I could be doing a better role as the bride of Christ!! Don't be like me guys, hope this helps someone.
Thanks for sharing this!!! ❤️ I am 29, extremely single and have made the decision to be intentional and enjoying singleness. As you were talking I def found myself in every single mistake you mentioned. Grateful for Gods protection though and for still having a plan for that part of my life.
This is my thing. It seems like nobody’s waiting these days ! At least Not the men ... and I’ve met guys who weren’t but were willing to TRY , but I’m like Mannnnn ......
I think this is a serious topic, I always ask myself what happened in the 90‘s till now. What went wrong that has course a lot of men to seek for sex before marriage? 😔😔😔
At this point, I just assume there’s something about me that’s just not attractive and just asked God to take the desire for anything that’s not about him and his kingdom away. I can’t live worried like this anymore.. sick of myself and all the moments of worrying. Like I say to my self sis.. get over this.. moment I get too obsessed I know my sight is crooked - not heaven/kingdom minded at all
This was me. I went a long time without anyone ever looking at me or being interested. I used to have frustrated conversations with God asking what was wrong with me. I've been through a ton of really brutal rejections and it crumbled my self esteem for a long time. Finally, God said "There is nothing wrong with you. It's just not time yet." Not really the answer I wanted. But I finally realized that I don't have to be anything different from who I am. I can just be me and a relationship will happen when it supposed to. And it did. At the right time. At the right place. I think through all the rejections, God was truly protecting my heart from men who were not ready to receive it. Just know God loves you and His timing is perfect.
I know exactly how you feel. God is not going to take away the natural feelings that he created us to have. We just have to put things in its proper place and not obsess about it. Also, dating in itself is nothing wrong. That's how we get to know people, how to get use of the opposite sex without being shellshock, crazy and to really know is this something you want. Dating is fact finding period of gettng to know someone. The issue is what you're doing on the date. You're trying to get to the prize too quickly instead of finding out what that person is all about.
Hello it sounds like you need to learn to love yourself and allow God to heal you from things and to show you His purpose for your life. If you cannot love yourself how can you love another? Would you marry yourself? Myles Munroe has a good teaching on singleness. You should check it out. Allow God to shape, heal, and transform you and when the time is right He will send the right person. I also love listening to Allyson Rowe she gives good singleness advice.
"I PRAISE YOU because I AM FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY made, marvelous are your works. I know that full well" -Psalm 139:14 Be comforted by the assurance that the God who was intimately involved in making the beautiful person you are, is ALSO IN CONTROL of the destiny of your life! You are beautiful in His eyes and He will orchestrate your life's situations to benefit YOU and bring Glory to Himself! Lots of Love!
Thanks for sharing! A huuuggeeee mistake I constantly make in my single season is looking back and moving back to old people as well. It’s a very hard habit to kick but I do because I believed at one point that this person was “the one” and this caused me much confusion. God is not the author of confusion and I need to learn to have more faith in him that my husband can come from anywhere, not just, from the past. Hard lesson to learn.
I do too and maybe I feel like that could be why it hasn’t happened yet? Maybe once we fix that then the rest will follow. I feel like that’s what the meaning of love is all about in the Bible - we’ve got to love God before we can truly love others etc.
I’m 27 and single and like you I wanted to take matters into my own hands and “plan” my life. I decided to sit in the backseat and let God take control. I married earlier and it was not what God wanted for me. I was tired of the same pattern and finally said enough is enough. I know that God has the ONE for me and the rest of the single ladies that’s reading this ❤️
I have been single for 3 years and a lot of people my age are either getting engaged, getting married or having kids. the pressure does get to my head at times but there are times when I just divet my mind back to God and remember what I asked God concerning my future spouse. So for now I will just utilise my singleness season and try be a better person.
Amen sister We have to put him first Our life is like a puzzle, God will fit in the pieces.. Let Jesus be the head of our life. He will make you happy.. He knows best. Just trust him
Your hair has gotten so long! 😍 Some mistakes that I have made in my single season would be comparison, impatience, ingratitude for my singleness and where God has me, having no faith in God, and complaining about my singleness. What have I learned from all these mistakes? I learned that at the end of the day God is the head of what is for me and what is not for me, I just have to wait and rest upon him in this time of singleness and give him gratitude for where he has me right now in my life.
I’m still struggling from number two. It was so bad that I literally thought the last guy I was with was Jesus and he came to save me. I was so delusional.
I know Melody says @6:45 mins in that she knows why God "specifically convicted (her)" to wait until marriage to have sex but brothers and sisters let me affirm to you that God calls all of us to wait. The Word outlines that sex outside of marriage is fornication and sex outside of marriage when you're already married is called adultery. These two acts are sin (and sin comes from the Hebrew word Khata which means to fail or miss the goal-that is, moral failure). Jesus died for our sins that we may be forgiven and reconciled unto God. Please, let us not dishonour and disregard the finish work of the Cross by choosing to indulge in sin and lusts of the flesh. And I 100% agree with melody, God has made this standard for our welfare and sound heart, but He also did it for His. For He does not delight in our shortcomings or our hurts.
Can you please explain to me how God still honors and allows people to get married when they have sex outside of marriage, yet those of us who wait seem to be in extended singleness. Why does God extend the wait for those who don’t fornicate ?
@@cecilalee4464 Cecila, so I've reformulated my response after thinking on it a bit more. First, Jesus said in Matthew that: "That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust." Matthew 5:45 KJV This means that God is merciful to all men, whether they are of faith in Him or not. Secondly, Your statement is actually not factual. There are *many* unsaved people who" can't find a man" or "need a good woman" lol. Considering that out of the 8 billion people on earth, only 3/4 are unsaved (and then we could go into the semantics of how many of the Christian body are *actually* saved and not really tares) it would appear that they are getting in relationships more than Christians because... They are! There's more of them. Thirdly, consider the nature of the relationships they are engaging in: many times these are short-term relationships based on lust and when that dwindles, so does the relationship. Or it could be long-term where ultimately the fact that they have vastly differing morals drives them apart. The point is, they get in relationships more often and get out of relationships just as often because they often times aren't founded on the firm foundations that God has given us to pursue. Is that what you want? Fourthly, think about why you want a spouse so badly. Is this desire consuming your mind to the point where you've made an idol of this person you've possibly met? Do you desire him more than you desire God? Does he preoccupy your thoughts more than God? Do you expect our Jealous God to give you an idol or somekme that will draw you in anyway away from Him? Cecila, sister, I'll encourage you to be patient and persistent in prayer for the man you desire to be your Husband. God is faithful is listening and faithful in answering once we do not doubt in our heart for what we pray for. Moreover, capatalise on your season of singleness as opportunities afforded now will not be be available when you're taken. Even the Apostle Paul said that. Remember, because you've been singing, your mind tends to magnify the appearance of other's relationships. Do not covet what they have, many times they leave those same relationships with terribly broken hearts and its not as beautiful as you may be making it out to be. Have faith. Keep Hope and utilise and make the most of what you have now so that God will bless you more. ❤️💕❤️
@@reggiBB thank you. I’ve been praying for years I feel ignored by God at times. I’m 29 and the desire won’t go away. Each year it gets stronger. Men talk to me then disappear. It’s because I won’t have sex. I’m terribly close to giving up to be honest but I’m fearful that something bad will happen once I dishonor God with my body. I’ll keep fighting.
@@cecilalee4464 I vey mush understand, Cecila. It could be daunting and and also lonely when we feel as though the desires of our heart aren't being met by God. That's normal to feel that way. I listened to a pastor last night, that said, "Some people may have been praying for 10 years for something that has never happened and they say, " well I've been praying for 10 years, and it's not come to pass". What I would say is that what I've been praying for is 10 years closer to coming to pass". He said this while talking about keeping the faith. And let me reassure you, there are maaan y men out there, many of whom are looking for a quick fix, to hit it and quit it. It would never be God's desire to see you become a victim of such a man/situation. If a man disappears because you are waiting till marriage, 1) that tells you he was only looking for sex, & 2)Good riddance! You're better off without him. That kind of shallow individual is not who you want for a husband anyway. Sister, don't be so focused on getting in a relationship and in doing so lower your standards that you forget that your goal is not to get in one, but to make one that lasts a lifetime, where your partner is your best friend, shared your morals and honours God and leads your family into a Christ-filled eternity. ❤️ Pray without ceasing. Make it a priority on your list and God will honour your perseverance. Like the story of the unjust Judge that harkened unto the woman because she kept coming to him in persistence, how much more will our God who is just harken unto you when you come to him in prayful persistence *and do not doubt when you pray* . ❤️❤️❤️
me and my son's dad have been broken up for 3 years and a little after we broke up, i decided to wait until marriage.. but in january of 2019, i slept with him a couple times. then stopped. and told myself again that i was going to wait until marriage. and then i slept with him again in october and a few weeks ago. it's taken such a huge toll on me.. it made me feel deep feelings towards him again after not feeling that way for so long and i deeply deeply regret it.. it's really hard for me to just walk away and not engage in this sexual sin again 😭😭😭 im just praying i will have the strength to walk away from it next time it comes up
@@10xoLUVxo10 thank youu! ive watched it before when the series was going on and it was so helpful but i wasn't really actively in my faith like i am now so i think i definitely need a refresher! im also watching hope city's relationship series from last year with jeremy foster who preached one of the crazy faith sermons and he is super amazing too
Sometimes the spirit is willing but the body is weak. You'll become stronger,just pray upon it . I know what it's like to fall back into a ditch you thought you'd never fall back in but you'll get the hang of it ❤
Hi, here are some powerful prayers. Praying for you and that the cycle be broken. Remember with God all things are possible. Matthew 19:26 ua-cam.com/video/5G8Fs_26rCA/v-deo.html ua-cam.com/video/fCYUU8hklcU/v-deo.html
I'm still in my single season and have been now age 48. So, My 1st mistakes is not waiting. I was immature about it. I never thought I would not wait. But felt pressured a bit and then given in just to experience it. Dumb and crazy as a crazy-straw. That showed me where I was at spiritually. 2nd, being in relationship to feel wanted and when you are desperate, you pick anyone for attention. You compromise almost everything just to have connection. I still want to be wanted but I have to be wise. I here you about looking back and it's like returning back to vomit, especially when you let him go because you realized that he did not want you the way you needed to be wanted. He had a different mindset. Another mistake as you said, being someone else and compromising my values to have a man. Fourth, for him to like me. Another mistake and this one I'm still dealing with, because I've been single for so long, not feeling that I'm worthy or inadequate. So, I'm still working on my self esteem. It doesn't matter how many scriptures you know, you truly have to value yourself in all its glory. You change only because you want to change and not to appease others to like you.The good thing is now I want the companionship and it's not thinking that he is a God. I realize that my souls joy does not come from another, it comes from peace within and that peace is God. The creator, the one who made us and gives us purpose. I still want this great man.
" The Only thing I can find True Satisfaction in, True Rest in and True Peace in, is in my Relationship with God. In knowing who I am in Him and Him being the thing that fills me up." ~Melody 🔥🔥 Amen to that, Loved it.💖💖
Hey Melody! I know I’m late to this video but I thank you for making this. I was just in the car crying to God how I felt lonely and was comparing myself to others who are in relationships. I am also very impatient. I appreciate your honesty and wisdom. I believe now I will take my time and allow God to keep working on me. I guess the hard part is, when you are trying to be obedient you look at others who moved a different way and still got blessed. In the end, I’m learning that single season is a blessing in disguise. Thank you for this and please pray that God moves on my heart.
I'm in the single season 😭 it's so easy to get into comparison and everything you just said I can relate to.....but by the Grace of God I'm growing and learning 🙏❤️
I definitely felt number 4. Its easy to get swallowed by impatience especially when boredom + loneliness hits but focusing on God and being in relationship with Him helps ❤🌸
I'm 20 year old girl and I have been single for my whole life.I used to hate this season but I finally realize that God is preparing me for the right person and it is a blessing.I now love myself and I'm grateful for what the Lord has done. Your videos are so inspirational and uplifting❤
I think the older you get the harder the single season but Lord knows I'm trying to cherish it this time around. In my last single season I made the mistake of settling for a relationship I had no business being in because I got impatient, but I'm wiser now and I'm definitely waiting for God to do the picking 😊.
I'm 29 and single. I'm about to be 30 in 2 days. I'm actually enjoying this journey. Deciding to wait until marriage makes me feel so empowered and secure.
I can sincerely say that relationships are overated. Yes, there are nice moments but not all the time, takes a lot of effort from both sides. Once I was convicted that he wasn't the one and didn't know how to tell him, it felt like a prison sentence and it was SUFFOCATING. I'm now savouring every single second of my singleness. I'd rather wait on God than get into a relationship that I can't ever get out of
Such a beautiful word. This is my single season and I’ve decided to be celibate. I have found that this has been the key to my soul and unlocked a power I never knew I had but God always knew I had.The shame and regret has left and I can be my true effective self. I no longer play let’s make a deal with myself and God. Glad to know I’m on the right path
Singleness is only hard for me when people question my singleness, question my sexuality or ask when will I get married and have kids(like I know the answer to that). I really hate when my parents ignorantly ask me for grandkids every other question so on Thanksgiving I told them the doctor told me I couldn't have kids. I'm genuinely happy single and get really triggered more than anything when people ask me about kids.
Mistakes made in Singleness 1. Comparision - brings misery and leaves you feeling like a victim 2. Idolizing the idea of being in a relationship - true peace and satisfaction comes with relationship with Christ not your partner 3. Don't play "Let's make a deal" with yourself and God ‐ save sex for marriage 4. Being impatient - Don't look backwards, have faith in God. Walk by faith not by sight 5. Wanting single season to be over with that you take it for granted. Sit in the beauty of your single moments
Sooo I just want to say that these videos you post on tuesdays really REALLY help 🥺. I’m currently in a position where I left a toxic relationship and I’m living a couple hours away from home away from my family. I look forward to seeing your vlogs I really took notes on getting a journal and sticky notes and writing my prayers down.... my singleness is a lot like yours with the whole comparison thing. All of my friends that I grew up with have children or are pregnant and I’m just looking like 😟😣. I have to take frequent breaks from social media because everyone is posting about their relationships with other individuals. It’s definitely hard being in a unfamiliar city where you only kinda know the people you work with. But every day is something different. With watching your videos, connecting with other believers from tik tok and believers from back home has really kept me going. (My grammar is horrible btw) So with this precious time alone, I’ve set some goals for myself and yeah. I try to stay busy doing either Lyft or Uber Eats. But Melody Thank you soooooo much!🥰 Blessings✌🏾
Melody this was so good! I definitely can agree with you on #5. Often times we are in a season of waiting and God is trying to not only develop us for the very thing we are waiting for but we are so focused on what we want that we cant even be present enough to recognize there is beauty exactly where we are. @God help us like only you can!
Yessss! I can relate to everything Melody said in this video especially about me not being able to see with the physical eye what God has in store for me so you go backwards instead enjoying your singleness. It def shows how much faith I have in God and how far I have to go but I’m still learning and growing 🙏🏾
Thé 2nd point is me! And the relationship ended expectedly for no reason other than, God is silent for him. I’m really thinking that the relationship ended so abruptly because I was slipping into idolizing the relationship. God is totally in control. The man said he needed space. And with this space given I realize how I was slipping. And I also see many things about that guy now. He’s a great great guy. But I was blind about a few essentials. I’m starting to be grateful to God! I never knew I could be grateful for the pain I was going through ! Thank you God for opening my eyes! And for consoling me in my pain!
I use to think this way, "why am I single" and then I stopped. Once I stopped, I began going on a lot of dates and had my first relationship. But my single season before dating was great. I was traveling and focusing on my education. But being in my first relationship, I didn't realize that it was a lot harder than I thought. That relationship didn't last long because he and I weren't' compatible. Now as newly single, I will stop idolizing "the one" and focus on building a relationship with God and learning to wait! Trust me, I had to learn the harder way that it is worth the wait. I too struggle with patience and I have to do better.
I relate so heavily with all 5 of the mistakes you mentioned. I am currently in my single season and though I've made some of the mistakes you've named, I'm now in a better place where I'm actually taking time to enjoy myself. I got so tired of being single after 3 years, I tried to plunge myself into this "relationship" later on that I knew was not God sent. When it failed, I was not surprised but that did not take away the heartache. Thank you, thank you for sharing your life experiences with us because it is doing absolute wonders for me🙌🏾I literally felt God sending me to your channel constantly, daily and I was hesitant to subscribe. Now I know why He's led me here. True subscriber for life🔐🙏🏾
Definitely going backwards to an old relationship but not out of impatience but out of comfort. It’s insane to me how the Lord allows me to discern “red flags” that I was blind to before.
I am single right now, and have been for almost a year now. I'm watching the video going "yes, uh huh, doing that too, same" yoh. Definitely rewatching and feeling myself heal and unlearn from the anxiety of being around couples and wanting to be coupled up to, the worry of whether or not the person I know God has created for me is actually even out there, all of it. Thank you for this video!
I Think I’ve come to terms with the fact that I only ever wants things for the peace that comes with not “not having” some thing. I don’t and none of us need these men or spouses. I think when we feel like “I bet my significant other would be able to understand me rn unlike the other ppl around me or if no ones down for me he would be. But God has been filling that role for you from time bbg. Loyalty, joy/excitement, understanding He’s got it for you if you’re willing to accept what he has for you
thank you sister,this video help me alot, i have been single for almost 10 years and its clear that is God who wants me single,and is very sad and lonely but it does not compare to knowing how much God loves you that he even protects you from yourself.God is wonderful.
I've been single, .married...and now single again so I agree with enjoying and being present in your single season. I salute you both for waiting until marriage. Good choice. I also like what you said about idolizing a relationship and making your partner a god. This is very important that you all get this principle before you get married. I didn't. I honestly got lost in my ex wife and that's easy to do because you get comfortable. Making a human being your world doesn't end well. Trust me. PLEASE listen to and heed what Melody said. I like how transparent and accountable you are about your mistakes because I think that's a honorable and rare quality these days.. Engagement,, the wedding and the honeymoon stage is all going to be exciting but how you grow together through changes will be the true test. Level to level, faith to faith and glory to glory. You both are going to be just fine. May God bless your covenant.
I’m dealing with a lot of shame right now and I’ve been Christian for fives years it grew up in a Christian household which I’m thankful for. But I’m dealing with a shame I’ve never thought I would be dealing with. I always did things “right” since I’ve became Christian. And I’ve allowed my guard down on my heart. I need help and don’t know how to start😞 I feel a great sadness and regret with in me and have repented and know God has forgiven me. I know and there’s great joy in that. But why do I feel so shameful
Hey girl, I understand where you are coming from. I was recently dealing with shame because of something I did. Just remember that we are free from shame and condemnation. Once you repented and turned away from your sin, God has forgotten about it. He keeps no records of wrongs. Allow the love of God to wash you and renew your mind. His mercy is new every morning. I hope you feel better soon.
I love your content. Thank you so much for this video. I'm currently in my single season and the biggest thing I'm working on is me and knowing my purpose in Christ. It can be difficult because I want to be in a relationship and have a family. Thank you for reminding me to trust God.
I really needed to watch this video and I thank Yahshua for guiding me to watch this video! Thank you Melony for being obedient to his Spirit and making this video. I am now more encouraged in my single season ❤️🙏🏾🤗
During my singleness I enjoyed being able to fully focus on my studies without stressing out about a guy. But after Grad School I got to the point where I was like, "Why are all my friends engaged or married except for me?" LOL
I'm 47 waiting until marriage and I have made all of these mistakes and then some. What I would add is not falling in the trap of living together but without fornicating. Were you both settle because your feel you won't find another person this great that will wait. If that person is not who God has for you no matter how great he or she may be, don't force it. You will delay the manifestation of who God has for you. Make sure your following God's will and trust in him.
This video definitely is my story. I’m a single mom and I desire to be married. I have realized I have made it an idol. During this journey of singleness, I have been attracting the same type of men knowing that’s not God has for me. I made a vow to God to remain abstinent til I get married. God has told me during this season I am in, it’s time for me to serve HIM wholeheartedly and that’s what I am going to do. I believe God is going to use me to tell my story as well
This video was so great and it literally spoke to me! Thank you for sharing! I am working on embracing my single season and just enjoying where the Lord has me now!
Hmm my mistakes would def be succumbing to sexual frustration in one season and hanging out w a romantic interest in the name of just being friends. Even tho I didn’t cross any line w him physically, I got whole entangled emotionally. Thanks for sharing sis!
I am 20 and single and thankfully waiting but you basically described me right now in this entire video so I feel like God sent you to wake me up. I am going to speak to Him and pray so I may be able to appreciate the season I am in right now. Thank you for your time and efforts, God bless!
Wow 😪 you do not know how much I needed this😭. I just stumbled upon this video. God really wanted me to here this message. Thank you so much. I idolize relationship too and compared so much. Now I know the truth. God bless you.🙏🏾
Thankyou for your honesty.💕 I too idolized getting married as I wanted to experience intimacy with my husband. Not knowing that like you said you will only be filled completely with God and not your husband. So now my focus is not on how long I've been single but now my attention has shifted for me to serve God wholeheartedly in my single season. I've never had a bfriend before and I'm 37yrs old.Though people have asked me out but I've been afraid to enter the next chapter of my life. God Bless Anà 💕
While I’ve experienced all of these... #5... wow. I’ve been single for a long time but was never interested in being content in that until recently. Surrendering that desire to God to be in a relationship or married is producing so much fruit in my life that I’m discovering so many new things about myself.. and God. He truly knows what’s best and He’s showing me that it’s better to wait for His best than to settle for what’s convenient or comfortable
I felt that second point. Time that we should spend focusing on God and preparing for life and marriage we spend obsessing over relationships so much that it becomes an idol. And when that relationship does come we're unprepared or there's still a void because we never learned how to put God first. It's tough ladies, especially with everyone around us getting in relationships and getting married but if it is His will, it will be done. Learn to enjoy your single season and rely on God to direct your path. Pray constantly for the spouse and the marriage that you desire.
I have learned the importance of keeping myself until marriage am currently in my single times and I made that mistake and I don't know how to get over the guilt and shame of actually failing to keep myself
hey Melody, This was the Realist Content. I love the statement where having a relationship with Jesus completes you. I have made some doozy of mistakes. The biggest mistake that I had in my relationship was putting them before God and not Acknowledge him and let him truly guide me and obey. Christ is now in my life and I am right now enjoying my single season.
Though still single, one of the mistakes I made earlier was not seriously seeking out my purpose. Knowing your purpose before being with someone is so vital, it helps with a lot of decision making in what type of person you want to spend the rest of your life with. I know better now
Love the comments😍! I have learnt in my single season to embrace everyday as it comes. There are days where I am like God thank you for this season of no distractions, your timing is perfect!!! . Then there are days where I am like I desire marriage God, does this man really exist? Both feelings are ok but must be submitted to the Lord as He is the only one who knows what to do or say in both instances. There is nothing wrong with how you are feeling and thinking.... But what you do if not handled correctly with those thoughts and feelings could be the problem. Pastor Steven Furtick said God will give you enough until IT(whatever IT may be) comes. So if you don't have something right now, you don't need it and He will give you enough until It comes.🔥 Hope this helps someone🤗Melody, God bless you, and thank you❤️ Sending love from South Africa🇿🇦❤️
I’m in the season now where God has convicted me of waiting until marriage. The way that I felt before of feeling robbed by giving myself to a man that wasn’t my husband was becoming unbearable for me. I truly am not willing to give myself to a man that isn’t my husband it’s not worth what I have to endure inside of myself.
Wow thank you so much for being transparent about what you learned, especially about saving until marriage because I needed to hear it’s not worth it and that God is protecting me, it’s not just me doing it because it’s ‘right’. I feel so encouraged
I've been in my single season for a decade going on 11 years now (I'm going to be 34 in 2 weeks), but after being saved & baptized this year, I think I'm FINALLY ready to enjoy my singleness. All the mistakes you pointed out are things I've been guilty of (or am still guilty of), but I'm so ready to just focus on Jesus and live out my purpose. Great video! Also, random question...what teeth whitening product do you use?? I can't stop staring at your perfect teeth 😂😂😂
I just want to say thank you so much for your videos every time I feel I want to step back I start reading my Bible and I come to your channels I honestly love you for this thank you so much ❤️🔥
I needed this. I've made all these mistakes but its good to know I'm not the only one. I have a new outlook on my single season knowing everything will happen in God's time. Thank you 😊
This whole video spoke volumes to how I’m feeling, but “You gonna be in your married season for life!” Really made it click 😂 I know I found your channel for a reason, Thank You!
Currently in it and I've made the mistakes you made. One other was not trusting God when He told me to let go of something good because He has something better in store. Good definitely does not always mean God.
I just found your videos the beginning of this year looking for a Daniel fast video and boy am I glad I found your videos they are so in tune with my life and what I'm going through it's like each video is made for me personally so you are touching a lot of people I cannot pinpoint one video that doesn't align with me personally and I am so thankful I found you and look forward to your videos I listen to them on the way to work, also listen to them just randomly and some of them which are going backwards for you but are going forward for me in my life, so thank you thank you thank
Idolising being in a relationship is a massive issue. May God help us single Christians! 🙏🏾
AMENNN
Amen! God bless us single Christian s🙏
Yeah, definitely. I am focusing on my friendships with other women, other brothers and sisters in Christ, on reading books (just joined a book club), figuring myself out in my career (pray for me, i'm looking for work again! It's rough out in these streets hah)
Amen.
I am married so maybe I should leave the comments to my single friends. However, I want to encourage you all to enjoy being single and truly get to know and understand who you are and what you are looking for in a partner and marriage.
I will say one of the best advice I have heard is that " you should find a partner (man) with whoms vision and mission you can align yourself with.
I however heard this in my 10th year of marriage........lol. If you think being single is hard try being married and lonely or being married and feeling unequally yoked and incompatible or being married and disconnected.
At that juncture you will be worst off than if you were alone and even worst ...... if you have children.
Best of luck to you hon, great video and to all the single people who may read this........marriage is beautiful but you have to work on you and find someone you are compatible with. Don't settle and don't compromise.
Thank you so much! This was needed
Wow thank you for this.
I'm enjoying this season!
Thank you all!!!
@Fetty Pup yup, but the men are never taught how to be husbands
I entertained guys that I knew were never going to be an option for me. I overshared my feelings, beliefs and struggles with them as if they were a therapist! I never went too far with them physically which was great! But now there are half a dozen men walking by around knowing just too much about me which is still unsettling, because they didn’t earn/need the personal information I gave them.
Thank you for your comments and for watching my channel kindly message me on my email address melodyalisa001@gmail.com
Thank you for this revelation
That's what I'm feeling right now about 2 guys
It makes me really inconfortable but I'm also glad because from their reaction when I told them my story
I knew immediately they were not the right person for me ( being judged is definitely not what I expect from my partner)
I totally understand this situation.
Something I've learned is that you can embrace your single season, but still have moments of desire. I used to feel like I had to be ok being single 24/7.I felt like anytime I felt discontent, I wasn't embracing my singleness. There was honestly a time where I was so busy that I wasn't thinking of my singleness, but this year, God has created more space for stillness. I do know that God places those desires in our hearts for a reason. I've learned not to drown the desires out, but to embrace them...don't sulk about them, but find ways to be intentional about other relationships and how to serve others in the meantime.
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles you i am call apostle T D yannick
Thank you☺️
Love this!
This is beautiful, thank you. God bless you 💕
Wisedom
For me, a mistake that I need to stop doing is being impatient and trying to “find the one” on my own. I just need to trust the Lord. I hope you can keep me in your prayers.
Omggg ! I’m the same way . It’s so hard, but I keep praying for patience 😩
@@crystallf26 girl so difficult to wait!!
Yeah I also stopped looking ,it will happen when God wants it to happen
WOW YOU'RE SPEAKING TO ME
I get you girl, I feel the same, but God is definitely gonna come through for us! 👏👏
I’m 25 and have only been in one situationship🥴. I’m learning more and more to trust in God’s timing but I have definitely fallen into the mistake of thinking something is wrong with me. Also I’ve made the mistake (still working on this one) of thinking that because I wasn’t all the way sexually pure and went back at one point that this is my punishment. I understand that sin does have its consequences but I also have to trust that if marriage is part of God’s plan for my life it WILL happen. My joy is in Him not in whether or not I end up getting married.
You’re beautiful ma 😌
@@Rayrizzletv thank you! God bless
Believe it or not, that’s actually theologically accurate. That being said, there may be times our flesh may desperately desire for partnership, but our spirit knows that God is actually who we need ultimately. It may be a constant war, but we’re called to be overcomes.
As a man, I’m encouraged by your comment. God bless.
Im learning this now-- seeing how i went from relationship to relationship hoping and "pretending" his is the one.. -- I made decisions to this day it is hard for me to forgive myself for-- but God does have a plan-- and I am now just trying to find peace and comfort in solely him-- Thanks for writing.
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles i am call apostle T D yannick
I relapsed on my celibacy journey recently over vacation. I learned that I wasn't yet strong enough to test the waters and solidified that I need Christian friends on a similar path in my life.
I was in a similar boat 3 years ago. The guilt was not a joke. Losing the Holy Spirit was the saddest part of it. I won’t do it again. I’m here for you.
We move
@Tiffany Addo Hey there, this was a random video on my feed, and I decided to watch through to see what a Christian’s perspective on this was, and if it was in line with scripture.
I’m glad you responded out of love but I’m curious to know one thing from your comment. And that is, do you believe that genuine believers, who were part of the vine, having received the Holy Spirit, but still struggle with sexual sins, can actually loose their salvation?
@@nu4968 Curious, do you happen to have a verse that supports the idea of the Holy Spirit leaving you in the midst of your walk with the Lord?
@@InDaClub12
You feel it. That feeling is unexplainable. It's worse than your first heartbreak. I will never go back. The amount of Grace , fasting, praying, consecration it takes to even get a fraction for what you had before... it's unexplainable. The protection you had on your life is gone. You don't want that to happen. This walk is not easy. It's all or nothing.
Also know that the fruit (s) of the spirit is a person. The Holy Spirit is a person. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit because the Holy Spirit is a person. Grace, mercy, favor, wisdom, might, understanding are all persons. Just like you wouldn't want to make your love one angry same thing with the Holy Spirit.
Some Scriptures
Revelations 21:8 ( the entire book tells you what happens when the Holy Spirit departs)
1 thesolonians 5:19
Hebrew 11:6
2 kings 1: 1-18
Ephesians 4:30
1 Peter 1:16
John 3:3
Judges 16:20.
Gal 5:22-23
Leviticus 19:31
1 John 2
1 Samuel 16:14
Gal 5:4
1 Sam 15:10-19
Rom 14:17
Titus 3:5
Hebrews 10:28-29
1 cor 12
Examples
When Abraham picked up Lot to go to the promise land. Abraham did not hear from God until lot left.
Samson
King Saul
Solomon (when he became a priest)
When Israel sinned and God sent them into captivity.
wait , can we talk about Melody's hair ?😭😭😭😭😻😻😻
aw haha thank you! it's trying so hard to fight the florida humidity 😩😂
@@MelodyAlisa awww move to London sissy lol, watching u with a huge double heated blankie & a cup of hot cocoa lol blessings🙏💖
I’m 24 and waiting till marriage and I really really needed this😭 I have an aunt who, although she means well, is constantly trying to push me into settling down and always wondering why I’m still Single. She’s always telling me that time is running out which I believe that but I don’t want to rush anything. My relationship with God isn’t even where I want it to be yet and I really want to discover my purpose and establish myself and who I am first. The comparison thing hit hard, especially with social media. To be honest I love being single but i do have my moments of sadness Whenever I see happy couples or am getting pressured to settle down already😩 I loved the fifth one because That’s exactly what I tell people all the time: you’re gonna be married forever why not just enjoy the few years when it’s just you and God. Lol sorry that was long but I really needed to hear this advice Big sis. Thank you♥️♥️♥️♥️
@@anesunyaradzo 💖
@@anesunyaradzodear l totally understand you, it's as if you're sharing the story of my own life.
I've had a relationship of 5 years and God told me that I needed to leave this person. So that's what I did. (And wow I've received blessings upon blessings) It wasn't easy but after that, God showed me why I needed to leave this relationship. It wasn't just one reason but there were so many. And I am so grateful that He told me to leave this relationship. Not only was it very toxic but I also wasn't ready to be in a relationship. I am definitely embracing my single season. I am healing, learning to love myself & also learning who I am in Christ. God is good 💕
Why and how on earth are we going through the same thing 😂😂💙💙 Amennn!! I mean exactly!
Same here, wow
Everything you said here is me right now ! I hope you are well a year on
I have a desire for marriage but I am enjoying this single season before entering into "forever." I love when you mentioned not making someone your "God"or idolizing a relationship. I had to learn that the hard way.
I just had to say you are absolutely beautiful! I was scrolling through the comments and I found your YT. Honestly seeing your UA-cam gave me some inspiration/ encouragement to keep on with my channel. God bless you ❤️
@@tasiaowens. Yes girl keep pushing! I will definitely support 🥰
I'm a single 27 year old. And when I tell you everyone around me is either dating or married... I mean everyone.
I feel you ! I feel you ! And lets add having babies in that too lol
@@itsshonaleigh340 my best friend and her husband just had a baby a week ago😂🙆
@Executing His Plan I'm serious. My sisters are asking me if I'm ok? Do guys ask me out? They are concerned. But in this season of my life I noticed how the world attached ones happiness to a relationship.
Same here everyone married and starting a family or both. I’m the only one whose single. I’m still trying to be encouraged and enjoy my single season but it do gets hard.
So damn right now 😭
Often times we see our singleness as a prison because everyone else around us is in a relationship & because of this we can fall for the counterfeit & see them as bail or a way out but singleness is a season to get to know yourself through God and whenever the right person comes along it's a addition to your joy that you already have ❤ They don't complete you but they compliment you.
Couldn't agree more!
Yes!
Beautifully said ❤️👑✨
I love that
They don't complete you they compliment you.
Well said!
Amen 💕👏
Whew, this is so good Sis. I have learned that I cannot rush God. I find myself saying “God, I’m 28, getting older.” Then I remember, I literally serve the Father of Time. Everything in God’s timing. I also heard that God will not bless you with an idol so I try to make sure I don’t idolize marriage and spending time wishing my Single season away thinking everything will be fixed once I’m married. Praying for myself and fellow sisters!
AMEN THANK YOU GOD BLESS YOU
Having faith that something better is waiting for me in the future. 🤔I like that
"I can not make him my god, he will be terrible god" WOW, word right there !!!
I think the mistakes I made or am making
- feeling inadequate or something is wrong with me
-entertaining guys I shouldn't do and not sticking to my boundaries
- thinking I need to help God
-watching to many videos on relationships (hahah)
- thinking marriage is the goal or a reward for good behavior
-crying and wanting something I don't have instead of focusing on all the great things I do have and what God is currently doing, yall I'm so ungrateful sometimes,
-forgetting that I am already in a covenant relationship with Jesus, and I could be doing a better role as the bride of Christ!!
Don't be like me guys, hope this helps someone.
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles you i am call apostle T D yannick
Thanks for sharing this!!! ❤️ I am 29, extremely single and have made the decision to be intentional and enjoying singleness. As you were talking I def found myself in every single mistake you mentioned. Grateful for Gods protection though and for still having a plan for that part of my life.
@Ruthie Chun If thats your real picture, stop lying, you arent single. lol
@@PremiumFuelOnly LOL! 😅 thank you?
Thinking I can date someone who didn't have the same desire to wait for marriage. Chileee... horrible! Failed every time lol never again.
every.single.time! i learned that one the hard way too!
This is my thing. It seems like nobody’s waiting these days ! At least Not the men ... and I’ve met guys who weren’t but were willing to TRY , but I’m like Mannnnn ......
I think this is a serious topic, I always ask myself what happened in the 90‘s till now. What went wrong that has course a lot of men to seek for sex before marriage? 😔😔😔
@@ajdadzie4617 fast and loose women
@@ajdadzie4617 Men are not raised to have strong character these days because they have no positive male role models. Their role models are rappers.
At this point, I just assume there’s something about me that’s just not attractive and just asked God to take the desire for anything that’s not about him and his kingdom away. I can’t live worried like this anymore.. sick of myself and all the moments of worrying. Like I say to my self sis.. get over this.. moment I get too obsessed I know my sight is crooked - not heaven/kingdom minded at all
This was me. I went a long time without anyone ever looking at me or being interested. I used to have frustrated conversations with God asking what was wrong with me. I've been through a ton of really brutal rejections and it crumbled my self esteem for a long time. Finally, God said "There is nothing wrong with you. It's just not time yet." Not really the answer I wanted. But I finally realized that I don't have to be anything different from who I am. I can just be me and a relationship will happen when it supposed to. And it did. At the right time. At the right place. I think through all the rejections, God was truly protecting my heart from men who were not ready to receive it. Just know God loves you and His timing is perfect.
I know exactly how you feel. God is not going to take away the natural feelings that he created us to have. We just have to put things in its proper place and not obsess about it. Also, dating in itself is nothing wrong. That's how we get to know people, how to get use of the opposite sex without being shellshock, crazy and to really know is this something you want. Dating is fact finding period of gettng to know someone. The issue is what you're doing on the date. You're trying to get to the prize too quickly instead of finding out what that person is all about.
Hello it sounds like you need to learn to love yourself and allow God to heal you from things and to show you His purpose for your life. If you cannot love yourself how can you love another? Would you marry yourself? Myles Munroe has a good teaching on singleness. You should check it out. Allow God to shape, heal, and transform you and when the time is right He will send the right person. I also love listening to Allyson Rowe she gives good singleness advice.
"I PRAISE YOU because I AM FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY made, marvelous are your works. I know that full well" -Psalm 139:14 Be comforted by the assurance that the God who was intimately involved in making the beautiful person you are, is ALSO IN CONTROL of the destiny of your life! You are beautiful in His eyes and He will orchestrate your life's situations to benefit YOU and bring Glory to Himself! Lots of Love!
Watch tony gaskins here on UA-cam. I think he will encourage you! ❤️
Thanks for sharing! A huuuggeeee mistake I constantly make in my single season is looking back and moving back to old people as well. It’s a very hard habit to kick but I do because I believed at one point that this person was “the one” and this caused me much confusion. God is not the author of confusion and I need to learn to have more faith in him that my husband can come from anywhere, not just, from the past. Hard lesson to learn.
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles you i am call apostle T D yannick
I struggle with being consistent with putting God first above my desire for marriage.
I do too and maybe I feel like that could be why it hasn’t happened yet? Maybe once we fix that then the rest will follow. I feel like that’s what the meaning of love is all about in the Bible - we’ve got to love God before we can truly love others etc.
THAT PART ABOUT LOOKING & MOVING BACKWARDS SHEEEESHHHH 😩😩😩😩 Thank you Jesus, I know you allowed her to toss that stone in my eye.
looool, sis we've been there
I’m 27 and single and like you I wanted to take matters into my own hands and “plan” my life. I decided to sit in the backseat and let God take control. I married earlier and it was not what God wanted for me. I was tired of the same pattern and finally said enough is enough. I know that God has the ONE for me and the rest of the single ladies that’s reading this ❤️
I have been single for 3 years and a lot of people my age are either getting engaged, getting married or having kids. the pressure does get to my head at times but there are times when I just divet my mind back to God and remember what I asked God concerning my future spouse. So for now I will just utilise my singleness season and try be a better person.
Amen sister
We have to put him first
Our life is like a puzzle, God will fit in the pieces.. Let Jesus be the head of our life. He will make you happy.. He knows best. Just trust him
couldn't agree more!
Your hair has gotten so long! 😍 Some mistakes that I have made in my single season would be comparison, impatience, ingratitude for my singleness and where God has me, having no faith in God, and complaining about my singleness. What have I learned from all these mistakes? I learned that at the end of the day God is the head of what is for me and what is not for me, I just have to wait and rest upon him in this time of singleness and give him gratitude for where he has me right now in my life.
Right now I am 19 and I can relate to every single mistake.
but we learn from each other.
thank you for posting.
I’m still struggling from number two. It was so bad that I literally thought the last guy I was with was Jesus and he came to save me. I was so delusional.
I know Melody says @6:45 mins in that she knows why God "specifically convicted (her)" to wait until marriage to have sex but brothers and sisters let me affirm to you that God calls all of us to wait. The Word outlines that sex outside of marriage is fornication and sex outside of marriage when you're already married is called adultery. These two acts are sin (and sin comes from the Hebrew word Khata which means to fail or miss the goal-that is, moral failure). Jesus died for our sins that we may be forgiven and reconciled unto God. Please, let us not dishonour and disregard the finish work of the Cross by choosing to indulge in sin and lusts of the flesh. And I 100% agree with melody, God has made this standard for our welfare and sound heart, but He also did it for His. For He does not delight in our shortcomings or our hurts.
Can you please explain to me how God still honors and allows people to get married when they have sex outside of marriage, yet those of us who wait seem to be in extended singleness. Why does God extend the wait for those who don’t fornicate ?
@@cecilalee4464 Cecila, so I've reformulated my response after thinking on it a bit more. First, Jesus said in Matthew that: "That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust."
Matthew 5:45 KJV
This means that God is merciful to all men, whether they are of faith in Him or not.
Secondly, Your statement is actually not factual. There are *many* unsaved people who" can't find a man" or "need a good woman" lol. Considering that out of the 8 billion people on earth, only 3/4 are unsaved (and then we could go into the semantics of how many of the Christian body are *actually* saved and not really tares) it would appear that they are getting in relationships more than Christians because... They are! There's more of them.
Thirdly, consider the nature of the relationships they are engaging in: many times these are short-term relationships based on lust and when that dwindles, so does the relationship. Or it could be long-term where ultimately the fact that they have vastly differing morals drives them apart. The point is, they get in relationships more often and get out of relationships just as often because they often times aren't founded on the firm foundations that God has given us to pursue. Is that what you want?
Fourthly, think about why you want a spouse so badly. Is this desire consuming your mind to the point where you've made an idol of this person you've possibly met? Do you desire him more than you desire God? Does he preoccupy your thoughts more than God? Do you expect our Jealous God to give you an idol or somekme that will draw you in anyway away from Him?
Cecila, sister, I'll encourage you to be patient and persistent in prayer for the man you desire to be your Husband. God is faithful is listening and faithful in answering once we do not doubt in our heart for what we pray for. Moreover, capatalise on your season of singleness as opportunities afforded now will not be be available when you're taken. Even the Apostle Paul said that. Remember, because you've been singing, your mind tends to magnify the appearance of other's relationships. Do not covet what they have, many times they leave those same relationships with terribly broken hearts and its not as beautiful as you may be making it out to be. Have faith. Keep Hope and utilise and make the most of what you have now so that God will bless you more. ❤️💕❤️
@@reggiBB thank you. I’ve been praying for years I feel ignored by God at times. I’m 29 and the desire won’t go away. Each year it gets stronger. Men talk to me then disappear. It’s because I won’t have sex. I’m terribly close to giving up to be honest but I’m fearful that something bad will happen once I dishonor God with my body. I’ll keep fighting.
@@cecilalee4464 I vey mush understand, Cecila. It could be daunting and and also lonely when we feel as though the desires of our heart aren't being met by God. That's normal to feel that way. I listened to a pastor last night, that said, "Some people may have been praying for 10 years for something that has never happened and they say, " well I've been praying for 10 years, and it's not come to pass". What I would say is that what I've been praying for is 10 years closer to coming to pass". He said this while talking about keeping the faith.
And let me reassure you, there are maaan y men out there, many of whom are looking for a quick fix, to hit it and quit it. It would never be God's desire to see you become a victim of such a man/situation. If a man disappears because you are waiting till marriage, 1) that tells you he was only looking for sex, & 2)Good riddance! You're better off without him. That kind of shallow individual is not who you want for a husband anyway. Sister, don't be so focused on getting in a relationship and in doing so lower your standards that you forget that your goal is not to get in one, but to make one that lasts a lifetime, where your partner is your best friend, shared your morals and honours God and leads your family into a Christ-filled eternity. ❤️ Pray without ceasing. Make it a priority on your list and God will honour your perseverance. Like the story of the unjust Judge that harkened unto the woman because she kept coming to him in persistence, how much more will our God who is just harken unto you when you come to him in prayful persistence *and do not doubt when you pray* . ❤️❤️❤️
@@reggiBB I’ll keep the faith. I’ll keep praying. I pray I have my testimony soon.
me and my son's dad have been broken up for 3 years and a little after we broke up, i decided to wait until marriage.. but in january of 2019, i slept with him a couple times. then stopped. and told myself again that i was going to wait until marriage. and then i slept with him again in october and a few weeks ago. it's taken such a huge toll on me.. it made me feel deep feelings towards him again after not feeling that way for so long and i deeply deeply regret it.. it's really hard for me to just walk away and not engage in this sexual sin again 😭😭😭 im just praying i will have the strength to walk away from it next time it comes up
I recommend Michael Todd’s relationship goals reloaded series! It really offers a helpful, biblical perspective on relationships,sex, and marriage
@@10xoLUVxo10 thank youu! ive watched it before when the series was going on and it was so helpful but i wasn't really actively in my faith like i am now so i think i definitely need a refresher! im also watching hope city's relationship series from last year with jeremy foster who preached one of the crazy faith sermons and he is super amazing too
Sometimes the spirit is willing but the body is weak. You'll become stronger,just pray upon it . I know what it's like to fall back into a ditch you thought you'd never fall back in but you'll get the hang of it ❤
@@nokwandathato753 tysm!!
Hi, here are some powerful prayers. Praying for you and that the cycle be broken. Remember with God all things are possible. Matthew 19:26 ua-cam.com/video/5G8Fs_26rCA/v-deo.html
ua-cam.com/video/fCYUU8hklcU/v-deo.html
I'm still in my single season and have been now age 48. So, My 1st mistakes is not waiting. I was immature about it. I never thought I would not wait. But felt pressured a bit and then given in just to experience it. Dumb and crazy as a crazy-straw. That showed me where I was at spiritually. 2nd, being in relationship to feel wanted and when you are desperate, you pick anyone for attention. You compromise almost everything just to have connection. I still want to be wanted but I have to be wise. I here you about looking back and it's like returning back to vomit, especially when you let him go because you realized that he did not want you the way you needed to be wanted. He had a different mindset. Another mistake as you said, being someone else and compromising my values to have a man. Fourth, for him to like me. Another mistake and this one I'm still dealing with, because I've been single for so long, not feeling that I'm worthy or inadequate. So, I'm still working on my self esteem. It doesn't matter how many scriptures you know, you truly have to value yourself in all its glory. You change only because you want to change and not to appease others to like you.The good thing is now I want the companionship and it's not thinking that he is a God. I realize that my souls joy does not come from another, it comes from peace within and that peace is God. The creator, the one who made us and gives us purpose. I still want this great man.
" The Only thing I can find True Satisfaction in, True Rest in and True Peace in, is in my Relationship with God. In knowing who I am in Him and Him being the thing that fills me up." ~Melody 🔥🔥
Amen to that, Loved it.💖💖
Hey Melody! I know I’m late to this video but I thank you for making this. I was just in the car crying to God how I felt lonely and was comparing myself to others who are in relationships. I am also very impatient. I appreciate your honesty and wisdom. I believe now I will take my time and allow God to keep working on me. I guess the hard part is, when you are trying to be obedient you look at others who moved a different way and still got blessed. In the end, I’m learning that single season is a blessing in disguise. Thank you for this and please pray that God moves on my heart.
Stay strong my friend. We are a community
I'm in the single season 😭 it's so easy to get into comparison and everything you just said I can relate to.....but by the Grace of God I'm growing and learning 🙏❤️
🙏🏾❤️
I definitely felt number 4. Its easy to get swallowed by impatience especially when boredom + loneliness hits but focusing on God and being in relationship with Him helps ❤🌸
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank i am call apostle T D yannick
I'm 20 year old girl and I have been single for my whole life.I used to hate this season but I finally realize that God is preparing me for the right person and it is a blessing.I now love myself and I'm grateful for what the Lord has done.
Your videos are so inspirational and uplifting❤
I think the older you get the harder the single season but Lord knows I'm trying to cherish it this time around. In my last single season I made the mistake of settling for a relationship I had no business being in because I got impatient, but I'm wiser now and I'm definitely waiting for God to do the picking 😊.
I'm 29 and single. I'm about to be 30 in 2 days. I'm actually enjoying this journey. Deciding to wait until marriage makes me feel so empowered and secure.
Trying to be like everyone else…Chasing and Chasing when God made me realise
“Look your not everyone else, your YOU.”
I can sincerely say that relationships are overated. Yes, there are nice moments but not all the time, takes a lot of effort from both sides. Once I was convicted that he wasn't the one and didn't know how to tell him, it felt like a prison sentence and it was SUFFOCATING. I'm now savouring every single second of my singleness. I'd rather wait on God than get into a relationship that I can't ever get out of
THIS.
Such a beautiful word. This is my single season and I’ve decided to be celibate. I have found that this has been the key to my soul and unlocked a power I never knew I had but God always knew I had.The shame and regret has left and I can be my true effective self. I no longer play let’s make a deal with myself and God. Glad to know I’m on the right path
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles you i am call apostle T D yannick
I been single my whole life. Don't expect it to change. I got used to being alone
Singleness is only hard for me when people question my singleness, question my sexuality or ask when will I get married and have kids(like I know the answer to that). I really hate when my parents ignorantly ask me for grandkids every other question so on Thanksgiving I told them the doctor told me I couldn't have kids. I'm genuinely happy single and get really triggered more than anything when people ask me about kids.
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank i am call apostle T D yannick
Mistakes made in Singleness
1. Comparision - brings misery and leaves you feeling like a victim
2. Idolizing the idea of being in a relationship - true peace and satisfaction comes with relationship with Christ not your partner
3. Don't play "Let's make a deal" with yourself and God ‐ save sex for marriage
4. Being impatient - Don't look backwards, have faith in God. Walk by faith not by sight
5. Wanting single season to be over with that you take it for granted. Sit in the beauty of your single moments
Putting him first, not trusting my instincts and thinking it will get better when it's clear it won't.
Sooo I just want to say that these videos you post on tuesdays really REALLY help 🥺. I’m currently in a position where I left a toxic relationship and I’m living a couple hours away from home away from my family. I look forward to seeing your vlogs I really took notes on getting a journal and sticky notes and writing my prayers down.... my singleness is a lot like yours with the whole comparison thing. All of my friends that I grew up with have children or are pregnant and I’m just looking like 😟😣. I have to take frequent breaks from social media because everyone is posting about their relationships with other individuals. It’s definitely hard being in a unfamiliar city where you only kinda know the people you work with. But every day is something different. With watching your videos, connecting with other believers from tik tok and believers from back home has really kept me going. (My grammar is horrible btw) So with this precious time alone, I’ve set some goals for myself and yeah. I try to stay busy doing either Lyft or Uber Eats. But Melody Thank you soooooo much!🥰 Blessings✌🏾
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God i am call apostle T D yannick
I am you 🥺 You are me. I’ve never related to a video like I did this one wow 😅❤️
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank i am call apostle T D yannick
For me, truly believing that there was something wrong with me because I wasn’t in a relationship while everyone and their mama was in one.
#relatable but we know it’s a lie from the enemy.
Melody this was so good! I definitely can agree with you on #5. Often times we are in a season of waiting and God is trying to not only develop us for the very thing we are waiting for but we are so focused on what we want that we cant even be present enough to recognize there is beauty exactly where we are.
@God help us like only you can!
This video was exactly what I needed!!! Singleness is so difficult, but I have faith that this season will be so worth it!
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank i am call apostle T D yannick
Yessss! I can relate to everything Melody said in this video especially about me not being able to see with the physical eye what God has in store for me so you go backwards instead enjoying your singleness. It def shows how much faith I have in God and how far I have to go but I’m still learning and growing 🙏🏾
I’m a male and a really enjoy your blogs. Keep it up!
Me too... what a light on UA-cam. 🙏🏼
Thé 2nd point is me! And the relationship ended expectedly for no reason other than, God is silent for him. I’m really thinking that the relationship ended so abruptly because I was slipping into idolizing the relationship. God is totally in control. The man said he needed space. And with this space given I realize how I was slipping. And I also see many things about that guy now. He’s a great great guy. But I was blind about a few essentials. I’m starting to be grateful to God! I never knew I could be grateful for the pain I was going through ! Thank you God for opening my eyes! And for consoling me in my pain!
This hit hard. Exactly how if feel right now. Will continue to wait for the creator 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Amen to this 🙏🏾
I use to think this way, "why am I single" and then I stopped. Once I stopped, I began going on a lot of dates and had my first relationship. But my single season before dating was great. I was traveling and focusing on my education. But being in my first relationship, I didn't realize that it was a lot harder than I thought. That relationship didn't last long because he and I weren't' compatible. Now as newly single, I will stop idolizing "the one" and focus on building a relationship with God and learning to wait! Trust me, I had to learn the harder way that it is worth the wait. I too struggle with patience and I have to do better.
I’m 22 and I’m enjoying every part of my singleness journey ! Thank you for sharing Mel ; definitely things I’ll look out for in order to avoid 🤗
I relate so heavily with all 5 of the mistakes you mentioned. I am currently in my single season and though I've made some of the mistakes you've named, I'm now in a better place where I'm actually taking time to enjoy myself. I got so tired of being single after 3 years, I tried to plunge myself into this "relationship" later on that I knew was not God sent. When it failed, I was not surprised but that did not take away the heartache. Thank you, thank you for sharing your life experiences with us because it is doing absolute wonders for me🙌🏾I literally felt God sending me to your channel constantly, daily and I was hesitant to subscribe. Now I know why He's led me here. True subscriber for life🔐🙏🏾
need more of this, i feel like you were talking to me
Haha me too Anna,though I'm a man. Wanna be friends Anna?
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles you i am call apostle T D yannick
Definitely going backwards to an old relationship but not out of impatience but out of comfort. It’s insane to me how the Lord allows me to discern “red flags” that I was blind to before.
Yesss!!! God is the source of my strength. The most important relationship. At the end of the day, that's who we're spending ETERNITY with!
I am single right now, and have been for almost a year now. I'm watching the video going "yes, uh huh, doing that too, same" yoh. Definitely rewatching and feeling myself heal and unlearn from the anxiety of being around couples and wanting to be coupled up to, the worry of whether or not the person I know God has created for me is actually even out there, all of it. Thank you for this video!
Never clicked so fast...I STAN YOU A WHOLE QUEEN💞💞💞💞💞.God bless you abundantly.😍😍😍
aw thank you so much sis!!
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles i am call apostle T D yannick
I Think I’ve come to terms with the fact that I only ever wants things for the peace that comes with not “not having” some thing. I don’t and none of us need these men or spouses. I think when we feel like “I bet my significant other would be able to understand me rn unlike the other ppl around me or if no ones down for me he would be. But God has been filling that role for you from time bbg. Loyalty, joy/excitement, understanding He’s got it for you if you’re willing to accept what he has for you
thank you sister,this video help me alot, i have been single for almost 10 years and its clear that is God who wants me single,and is very sad and lonely but it does not compare to knowing how much God loves you that he even protects you from yourself.God is wonderful.
I've been single, .married...and now single again so I agree with enjoying and being present in your single season. I salute you both for waiting until marriage. Good choice. I also like what you said about idolizing a relationship and making your partner a god. This is very important that you all get this principle before you get married. I didn't. I honestly got lost in my ex wife and that's easy to do because you get comfortable. Making a human being your world doesn't end well. Trust me. PLEASE listen to and heed what Melody said. I like how transparent and accountable you are about your mistakes because I think that's a honorable and rare quality these days.. Engagement,, the wedding and the honeymoon stage is all going to be exciting but how you grow together through changes will be the true test. Level to level, faith to faith and glory to glory. You both are going to be just fine. May God bless your covenant.
I’m dealing with a lot of shame right now and I’ve been Christian for fives years it grew up in a Christian household which I’m thankful for. But I’m dealing with a shame I’ve never thought I would be dealing with. I always did things “right” since I’ve became Christian. And I’ve allowed my guard down on my heart. I need help and don’t know how to start😞 I feel a great sadness and regret with in me and have repented and know God has forgiven me. I know and there’s great joy in that. But why do I feel so shameful
Hey girl, I understand where you are coming from. I was recently dealing with shame because of something I did. Just remember that we are free from shame and condemnation. Once you repented and turned away from your sin, God has forgotten about it. He keeps no records of wrongs. Allow the love of God to wash you and renew your mind. His mercy is new every morning. I hope you feel better soon.
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles you i am call apostle T D yannick
GIRLLLL IM 29 AND GOING THRUUU ITTT.. Pressure Pressure
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank i am call apostle T D yannick
@@yannicktenekeunde3205 Hello Yannick, thanks for ur message... how comes u wanna get to know me and u dont even know how i look like?
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles you
I needed this video thank you !!
I love your content. Thank you so much for this video. I'm currently in my single season and the biggest thing I'm working on is me and knowing my purpose in Christ. It can be difficult because I want to be in a relationship and have a family. Thank you for reminding me to trust God.
I really needed to watch this video and I thank Yahshua for guiding me to watch this video! Thank you Melony for being obedient to his Spirit and making this video. I am now more encouraged in my single season ❤️🙏🏾🤗
During my singleness I enjoyed being able to fully focus on my studies without stressing out about a guy. But after Grad School I got to the point where I was like, "Why are all my friends engaged or married except for me?" LOL
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank i am call apostle T D yannick
I'm 47 waiting until marriage and I have made all of these mistakes and then some. What I would add is not falling in the trap of living together but without fornicating. Were you both settle because your feel you won't find another person this great that will wait. If that person is not who God has for you no matter how great he or she may be, don't force it. You will delay the manifestation of who God has for you. Make sure your following God's will and trust in him.
This video definitely is my story. I’m a single mom and I desire to be married. I have realized I have made it an idol. During this journey of singleness, I have been attracting the same type of men knowing that’s not God has for me.
I made a vow to God to remain abstinent til I get married. God has told me during this season I am in, it’s time for me to serve HIM wholeheartedly and that’s what I am going to do. I believe God is going to use me to tell my story as well
1. comparison
2. idolizing relationships
3. waiting until marriage...5:40 repercussions
4. patience
5. missing the beautiful moments
This video was so great and it literally spoke to me! Thank you for sharing! I am working on embracing my single season and just enjoying where the Lord has me now!
Thank you so much I am a freshman in college and this was so helpful😭 God bless you and congratulations on your engagement 🥳❤️
i'm so glad!! You're more than welcome. God bless sis and thank you!
Hmm my mistakes would def be succumbing to sexual frustration in one season and hanging out w a romantic interest in the name of just being friends. Even tho I didn’t cross any line w him physically, I got whole entangled emotionally. Thanks for sharing sis!
I've been there with an emotional entanglement as well. Whew its just as hard to break away.
I am 20 and single and thankfully waiting but you basically described me right now in this entire video so I feel like God sent you to wake me up. I am going to speak to Him and pray so I may be able to appreciate the season I am in right now. Thank you for your time and efforts, God bless!
Wow 😪 you do not know how much I needed this😭. I just stumbled upon this video. God really wanted me to here this message. Thank you so much. I idolize relationship too and compared so much. Now I know the truth. God bless you.🙏🏾
Thankyou for your honesty.💕
I too idolized getting married as I wanted to experience intimacy with my husband.
Not knowing that like you said you will only be filled completely with God and not your husband.
So now my focus is not on how long I've been single but now my attention has shifted for me to serve God wholeheartedly in my single season.
I've never had a bfriend before and I'm 37yrs old.Though people have asked me out but I've been afraid to enter the next chapter of my life.
God Bless
Anà 💕
While I’ve experienced all of these... #5... wow. I’ve been single for a long time but was never interested in being content in that until recently. Surrendering that desire to God to be in a relationship or married is producing so much fruit in my life that I’m discovering so many new things about myself.. and God. He truly knows what’s best and He’s showing me that it’s better to wait for His best than to settle for what’s convenient or comfortable
I felt that second point. Time that we should spend focusing on God and preparing for life and marriage we spend obsessing over relationships so much that it becomes an idol. And when that relationship does come we're unprepared or there's still a void because we never learned how to put God first. It's tough ladies, especially with everyone around us getting in relationships and getting married but if it is His will, it will be done. Learn to enjoy your single season and rely on God to direct your path. Pray constantly for the spouse and the marriage that you desire.
I have learned the importance of keeping myself until marriage am currently in my single times and I made that mistake and I don't know how to get over the guilt and shame of actually failing to keep myself
hey Melody, This was the Realist Content. I love the statement where having a relationship with Jesus completes you. I have made some doozy of mistakes. The biggest mistake that I had in my relationship was putting them before God and not Acknowledge him and let him truly guide me and obey. Christ is now in my life and I am right now enjoying my single season.
I've been single for 5 years now and ALL of these things resonate so well with me. Definitely needed this timely reminder. Thanks girl ❤️
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles you i am call apostle T D yannick
Though still single, one of the mistakes I made earlier was not seriously seeking out my purpose. Knowing your purpose before being with someone is so vital, it helps with a lot of decision making in what type of person you want to spend the rest of your life with. I know better now
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God i am call apostle T D yannick
Love the comments😍! I have learnt in my single season to embrace everyday as it comes. There are days where I am like God thank you for this season of no distractions, your timing is perfect!!! . Then there are days where I am like I desire marriage God, does this man really exist? Both feelings are ok but must be submitted to the Lord as He is the only one who knows what to do or say in both instances. There is nothing wrong with how you are feeling and thinking.... But what you do if not handled correctly with those thoughts and feelings could be the problem.
Pastor Steven Furtick said God will give you enough until IT(whatever IT may be) comes. So if you don't have something right now, you don't need it and He will give you enough until It comes.🔥
Hope this helps someone🤗Melody, God bless you, and thank you❤️
Sending love from South Africa🇿🇦❤️
All spoken was truth.
I appreciate your transparency.
I’m in the season now where God has convicted me of waiting until marriage. The way that I felt before of feeling robbed by giving myself to a man that wasn’t my husband was becoming unbearable for me. I truly am not willing to give myself to a man that isn’t my husband it’s not worth what I have to endure inside of myself.
Wow thank you so much for being transparent about what you learned, especially about saving until marriage because I needed to hear it’s not worth it and that God is protecting me, it’s not just me doing it because it’s ‘right’. I feel so encouraged
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank i am call apostle T D yannick
This was so helpful. As a teen, I know God has a plan but sometimes it can feel like you need to be in a relationship because everyone else is in one.
I've been in my single season for a decade going on 11 years now (I'm going to be 34 in 2 weeks), but after being saved & baptized this year, I think I'm FINALLY ready to enjoy my singleness. All the mistakes you pointed out are things I've been guilty of (or am still guilty of), but I'm so ready to just focus on Jesus and live out my purpose. Great video! Also, random question...what teeth whitening product do you use?? I can't stop staring at your perfect teeth 😂😂😂
I just want to say thank you so much for your videos every time I feel I want to step back I start reading my Bible and I come to your channels I honestly love you for this thank you so much ❤️🔥
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles i am call apostle T D
I REALLY needed to see this video. Guilty of #2.... and basically all of them!!!
I needed this. I've made all these mistakes but its good to know I'm not the only one. I have a new outlook on my single season knowing everything will happen in God's time. Thank you 😊
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God i am call apostle T D yannick
This whole video spoke volumes to how I’m feeling, but “You gonna be in your married season for life!” Really made it click 😂 I know I found your channel for a reason, Thank You!
Hi dear is a plesure to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit me thank God bles i am call apostle T D yannick
How this is what I’m exactly going through LAWWWWDDDD I see the sign I need to chill out and enjoy this season!
Hi dear is a plesure an privilage to meet you i wish to no you beter if you permit thank i am call apostle T D yannick
Currently in it and I've made the mistakes you made. One other was not trusting God when He told me to let go of something good because He has something better in store. Good definitely does not always mean God.
I just found your videos the beginning of this year looking for a Daniel fast video and boy am I glad I found your videos they are so in tune with my life and what I'm going through it's like each video is made for me personally so you are touching a lot of people I cannot pinpoint one video that doesn't align with me personally and I am so thankful I found you and look forward to your videos I listen to them on the way to work, also listen to them just randomly and some of them which are going backwards for you but are going forward for me in my life, so thank you thank you thank