Totally Accurate Battle Simulator - War is Swell

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  • Опубліковано 2 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 201

  • @Clockwork-Rat
    @Clockwork-Rat 3 роки тому +333

    I love how Jon is trying to be strategic in a game where your units will die from walking off a ledge for no reason

    • @mrcheesemunch
      @mrcheesemunch 3 роки тому +13

      You can actually strategize a fair bit, such as sending some suicide peasants out to group enemies up while your cannons walk in to range...

    • @FriskyD.
      @FriskyD. 3 роки тому +4

      @@mrcheesemunch and then the canons get too close, and the enemy closes the distance

    • @abox7825
      @abox7825 3 роки тому +4

      To be fair you do have to experiment and know what the units do to win in the campaigns.

  • @johnyshadow
    @johnyshadow 3 роки тому +329

    I kinda want to see a Jon vs. Claire in this.

    • @cambur13
      @cambur13 3 роки тому +11

      Either one of these are acceptable. 10/10 💯

    • @habadasheryjones
      @habadasheryjones 3 роки тому +11

      On the condition that they make their own units in the unit creator.

    • @goldengolem4670
      @goldengolem4670 3 роки тому

      YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

    • @jediknight1294
      @jediknight1294 3 роки тому +1

      @@habadasheryjones they need to make Tabby

    • @xdeser2949
      @xdeser2949 3 роки тому

      100%

  • @seanmcloughlin5983
    @seanmcloughlin5983 3 роки тому +139

    That’s the kind of swagger that says “Hey I’m Zeus, you wanna see me when I’m a swan.”
    Best Jon line ever.

    • @apa21
      @apa21 3 роки тому +15

      I died with that accurate nonchalant attitude of Zeus.

    • @BlockheadJiujitsu
      @BlockheadJiujitsu 3 роки тому +4

      Couldn't stop laughing, a true classic

    • @elgato1721
      @elgato1721 3 роки тому +6

      Exaggerated swagger of a Greek god

  • @JhenMaster
    @JhenMaster 3 роки тому +157

    *"This is sorta working!"*
    A profoundly Jon statement

  • @iPhoneeditor
    @iPhoneeditor 3 роки тому +72

    "It's always good to have a few sacrificial halflings at the front" - Sun Tzu "The Art of War"

    • @jimmilton6644
      @jimmilton6644 3 роки тому

      all war is based (even though the original quote is all WARFARE is based on deception)

  • @adapperwatchtower6598
    @adapperwatchtower6598 3 роки тому +75

    As a watchtower who has had to exist for all tim- er I mean was built by the good Dacians, it’s great watching these totally accurate battles, brings back memorys

    • @Lampomaniac
      @Lampomaniac 3 роки тому +1

      The creativity of this community never ceases to amaze me!

    • @AccessDenied20078
      @AccessDenied20078 3 роки тому +5

      Oh watchtower of the valley. What is your wisdom?

    • @Drghost1235
      @Drghost1235 3 роки тому +1

      @@AccessDenied20078 Pain?

  • @thegiantmimir4664
    @thegiantmimir4664 3 роки тому +32

    "A couple of ice archers to lay down... the fire."

  • @JhenMaster
    @JhenMaster 3 роки тому +79

    Jon is taking this weirdly seriously... He called the wheelbarrow guys "cavalry"... XD

    • @5Andysalive
      @5Andysalive 3 роки тому +20

      It's techncially a chariot.

    • @Freya27395
      @Freya27395 3 роки тому +2

      Its a Bob Ross at best xd

  • @s7robin105
    @s7robin105 3 роки тому +23

    You can also control the units yourself by pressing F. It’s a silly game, not meant for a serious strategy but one of those “what if a cowboy fought a samurai”

    • @SkaterBlades
      @SkaterBlades 3 роки тому +9

      "What if a samurai and a cowboy fought a man dressed as a cactus and a midget"

  • @uncle5164
    @uncle5164 3 роки тому +72

    Man it’s been years since I’ve seen a TABS video, thanks Jon.

    • @madmanwithaplan1826
      @madmanwithaplan1826 3 роки тому +2

      Angory tom of the Yogscast has a ton of great tabs videos on his channel. Doing the main campaign, custom campaigns that try to emulate various movies, and my personal favors his HORSE version where he plays against friends.

    • @jimmilton6644
      @jimmilton6644 3 роки тому

      say the line uncle

  • @winterwolf1660
    @winterwolf1660 3 роки тому +6

    good ragdoll physics fun. plus you can press F on highlighted units to take direct control (helpful for when your Zues dont aim down a bit)

  • @TheGrinningViking
    @TheGrinningViking 3 роки тому +30

    Jon was lured in by promises of a bacon tree:
    but it turned out to be a hambush!

  • @5Andysalive
    @5Andysalive 3 роки тому +20

    Other people run half their channel on this game. And it doesn't make me angory at all.

  • @Edge-wx7hv
    @Edge-wx7hv 3 роки тому +29

    26:20 Untitled Zeus Game (rated M for Mature)

  • @Endrian
    @Endrian 3 роки тому +30

    Potion seller, I require your strongest potions.

    • @abox7825
      @abox7825 3 роки тому +14

      You cannot handle my strongest potions

    • @Freya27395
      @Freya27395 3 роки тому +1

      Back story of my ayahuasca trip

  • @fuzzyfuzzyfungus
    @fuzzyfuzzyfungus 3 роки тому +10

    I like how the solution to at least half the levels appears to be throwing endless waves of lurching, leaping, halflings at the problem. It's got kind of a zombie horde vibe to it.

  • @Mr.Goufball
    @Mr.Goufball 3 роки тому +52

    Finally. This is one of my favorite games. If you don’t play the entire game I will be really disappointed.

  • @veggiesnake619
    @veggiesnake619 3 роки тому +2

    "Hey, I'm Zeus. Do you wanna see me when I'm a swan?"
    "NOOOO, GOD! NO, GOD, PLEASE NO! NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOO!"

  • @Forral87
    @Forral87 3 роки тому +6

    plus 1 vote for Claire vs Jon livestream in this game (p.s. check out Angory Tom for great TABS videos and how to do fun multiplayer)

  • @noahb-e8106
    @noahb-e8106 3 роки тому +20

    Would love to see this as a livestream!

  • @jamesclarkson156
    @jamesclarkson156 3 роки тому +9

    The most amount of fun I had in this game was when I decided to see how many hobbits does it take to kill every other unit.
    Turns out I don't have the CPU to find out.

  • @hughcopson1799
    @hughcopson1799 3 роки тому +3

    "I need some range I can trust"
    Picks the unit that throws a bomb at the nearest enemy, regardless of who else is nearby.

  • @BobBigWheels
    @BobBigWheels 3 роки тому +9

    The dragon most of the time only breaks itself, you got lucky

  • @mariosoto2588
    @mariosoto2588 3 роки тому +39

    Somebody was making a Total War game while he was high as hell

    • @manlikemars2929
      @manlikemars2929 3 роки тому +3

      This game is by Landfall, whom are also the creators of Clustertruck

    • @d3north
      @d3north 3 роки тому +1

      @@manlikemars2929 aka flip a game as fast as possible and switch from project to project whenever YT decides which game to feature. Man's been doing it for years and has a whole host of games abandoned.

    • @j2dragon109
      @j2dragon109 3 роки тому

      @@d3north I am very confused by what on earth you are going on about. Landfall is a team of people, and they've finishied realsing quite a few games.

  • @loreofmetalenthusiast
    @loreofmetalenthusiast 3 роки тому +4

    God that first encounter had me cracking up 😂
    Just a swarm of halflings

  • @ChulioRCHulio
    @ChulioRCHulio 3 роки тому +13

    Yes I waited for this! And the totally accurate criticism from MATN regading the "ancient" faction

  • @ianmiller6040
    @ianmiller6040 3 роки тому

    1:22: You can, in fact, control the individual units, by zooming down close to the unit you want to possess and pressing F; you'll immediately enter a third-person mode to control them. Then you can even press C to enter first-person mode! While controlling them, you can move around and use their attacks with various keys. Very fun.

  • @Vokabre
    @Vokabre 3 роки тому +10

    7:30 What an unusual Rome Total War episode

  • @lex400
    @lex400 3 роки тому +12

    Need to see a Jon Vs Claire for this game

  • @macroglossumstellatarum5932
    @macroglossumstellatarum5932 3 роки тому +7

    Now I want too know what the Monkey King does...
    Of all the things Sun Wukong can do, which made it into the game?

    • @the_tactician9858
      @the_tactician9858 3 роки тому +11

      Duplication and whacking things with his trusty stick.
      And no, he still has no foresight.

  • @sotnosen95
    @sotnosen95 3 роки тому

    I like how pretty much any gun that packs any kind of significant punch gets translated as "shotgun" in Jon's head.

  • @CommissarMitch
    @CommissarMitch 3 роки тому +2

    You use Frodo and Bilbo as good Halflings completely sleeping on Sam Gamgee, the best Halfling.

  • @RedRebel_99
    @RedRebel_99 3 роки тому

    Ooh Jon breaking out the Jupiter insults lol loving the sacrificial halflings

  • @Trenchgun1
    @Trenchgun1 3 роки тому +1

    this is lovely, id love to see more of this

  • @BauthorFowler
    @BauthorFowler 3 роки тому +1

    Have you heard of "From the Depths?" It's a weird thing where you design your own submarine or gunboat to go against someone else's. I first saw it on a channel called Lathland.

  • @DontEvenWorryAbout1t
    @DontEvenWorryAbout1t 3 роки тому +13

    Zeus sidles up to a 22 yo off-duty waitress at the bar
    "Yo Steve, her next one's on me.
    Hey gurl, wanna see me turn into a swan?"
    Next thing we know, las vegas turns into a decade-long battlefield between atlantic and pacific coastal states

  • @habadasheryjones
    @habadasheryjones 3 роки тому

    Discovered this on game pass a while back. Its the best battle sim out there to me because it embraces its bonkers style. Devs have supported it for years and packed alot of content into it with multiple campaigns, freeplay, unit and map creators.

  • @bocobipbrookiebradgaming7838
    @bocobipbrookiebradgaming7838 3 роки тому +5

    Was waiting for you to play this game

  • @Wyrmshield
    @Wyrmshield 3 роки тому

    I like how Jon's favorite tactic is just mass zerglings

  • @professorsypher6174
    @professorsypher6174 3 роки тому +4

    I'm just sitting here patiently waiting for the Kotor 2 playthrough. Don't mind me.

  • @noddler217
    @noddler217 3 роки тому +3

    'I appeciate [the hwatcha], that thing's fun!' Um... I'll take that as Jon hasn't seen the Mythbusters episode that dealt with that thing then, because if he had he'd know that three of those will absolutely mulch basically anything that gets within about half a mile of them.

  • @imperlast2
    @imperlast2 3 роки тому

    the dragon falls apart quickly when it gets hi with range

  • @xiotrapeh3617
    @xiotrapeh3617 3 роки тому +2

    I love this game

  • @FonVegen
    @FonVegen 3 роки тому +3

    What is a wheelbarrow, if not a vintage chariot?

  • @MegaRay220
    @MegaRay220 3 роки тому +2

    This was genuinely one of my most played games of the last few years. Can't wait for the full release on Xbox

  • @deteon1418
    @deteon1418 3 роки тому +1

    Great video!
    More of this would be fantastic!

  • @T-minus-infinite
    @T-minus-infinite 3 роки тому +1

    Look around the maps for secret units

  • @fishpop
    @fishpop 3 роки тому +1

    Jon is only checking this game out NOW?
    For shame...
    I've been watching Angory Tom play this for possibly a year now... It's hard to tell...
    Just checked: he's been playing since April 2019 and i've been subbed to him since March 2018.

  • @kylelewis4685
    @kylelewis4685 3 роки тому +2

    Zeus is kinda the man... Also I feel like I would first attempt every level with just hobbits before trying anything fancy

  • @weaverflytyer
    @weaverflytyer 3 роки тому

    i fucking love this game massively massively underrated the physics engine is mindblowing and so much goofy shit happens

  • @Tortera777
    @Tortera777 3 роки тому

    I am so glad Jon is able to play fun and relaxing games..... Because you know what is coming tomorrow but we should be GOLDEN. Have fun man you deserve it!!

  • @seansedore2708
    @seansedore2708 3 роки тому +3

    Thanks again for the video, Jon

  • @jordantennant3922
    @jordantennant3922 3 роки тому +4

    You gotta think more thinky like - Jon, 2021

  • @williammiller79
    @williammiller79 3 роки тому +1

    Don’t mention captain sauce to matn. Man uses halflings as testing dummies and probably sells their corpses for mulch. Does explain why the grassy maps look beautiful though

  • @Heshla_Biea
    @Heshla_Biea 3 роки тому +1

    You can control units. I've seen people do it.

  • @McCbobbish
    @McCbobbish 3 роки тому

    I have found that piles of musketeers in various locations is the best army in the game lol

  • @pkgizmo
    @pkgizmo 3 роки тому

    they also made a funny wobbly and silly bananas on toast battle royal which actually is pretty fun

  • @hamhamson7740
    @hamhamson7740 3 роки тому +4

    It wouldn't be a Many a true nerd video without Jon using indirect fire incorrectly

  • @xdeser2949
    @xdeser2949 3 роки тому

    2:32 "King Vendrick vs hollows" ~Second Age of Fire

  • @gaminreasons8941
    @gaminreasons8941 3 роки тому

    Getting whiplash here, never thought I'd see Jon play this, usually I just watch Captainsauce who has a series on this.

  • @varuraptor7079
    @varuraptor7079 3 роки тому

    I can’t believe I am hearing John play tabs, please for the love of god make this a series.

  • @BradTheAmerican
    @BradTheAmerican 3 роки тому

    I put this on in the background and eventually forgot what game you were playing. Then you mentioned ice arrows and balloon arrows and I was like "wait, that's not Rome Total War."

  • @maremaarten
    @maremaarten 3 роки тому

    well, I love that balloon archer!

  • @Barista.Nathan
    @Barista.Nathan 3 роки тому

    I've been following TABS since the very beginning, back when there was only one campaign at the Church and the Super Peasant was God.

  • @AmirDarkOne
    @AmirDarkOne 3 роки тому +1

    did you know Japanese samurai can deflect any missiles attack, including bullets

  • @elinagel-bennett344
    @elinagel-bennett344 3 роки тому +4

    Damn this TW looking fire

  • @Learnos1
    @Learnos1 3 роки тому +1

    I'd love to see a lot more of this, it's hilarious

  • @loganjamesonhatch5050
    @loganjamesonhatch5050 3 роки тому +1

    the difference in watching jon and captain sauce pplay this game is intellegence versus practice

  • @Notorious_C.J.P
    @Notorious_C.J.P 3 роки тому

    Id love to see jon do a campaign in DAC. That would be a sweet campaign regardless of who he would pick

    • @PAINNN666
      @PAINNN666 3 роки тому

      DAC?

    • @Notorious_C.J.P
      @Notorious_C.J.P 3 роки тому

      @@PAINNN666 medieval 2 mod, third age total war divide and conquer.

  • @katejones8705
    @katejones8705 3 роки тому

    TABS is silly but entertaining, there's so much variety.

  • @scolek22
    @scolek22 3 роки тому +1

    26:13
    CLASSICS MAJOR SPOTTED
    GET EM BOYS

  • @Skreezilla
    @Skreezilla 3 роки тому

    Giant pile of Artillery? Let us just send waves and waves and wavers of people!
    Jon would have been a great General in ww1 BAAAAHH

  • @SledgeOfHouseHammer
    @SledgeOfHouseHammer 3 роки тому +2

    Wait until he discovers ballista + cheerleader.

  • @BDMotorsport
    @BDMotorsport 3 роки тому

    Please never stop making content Jon.

  • @burno55_
    @burno55_ 3 роки тому

    Reapers are crazy overpowered in this game.

  • @harveybrookfield6855
    @harveybrookfield6855 3 роки тому

    more of this please jon! I loved it

  • @PAINNN666
    @PAINNN666 3 роки тому

    Jon. You have control on units since 2019. Just push F

  • @Ryu_D
    @Ryu_D 3 роки тому

    Thank you for the episode.

  • @super_7710
    @super_7710 3 роки тому

    "you've got to be more thinky like than that"
    *looks at my 50 spear throwers* o_o

  • @DirkDwipple
    @DirkDwipple 3 роки тому

    Frodo and Bilbo will take on anyone in a barbwire cage match.

  • @TheHaloring7
    @TheHaloring7 3 роки тому

    Please play more of this Jon

  • @Nibmeister
    @Nibmeister 3 роки тому

    Potionseller, I'm going into totally accurate battle, and I need only your strongest potions.

  • @marnixiii816
    @marnixiii816 3 роки тому +1

    Oh no, we've moved to "It's been on my rader for a while"...

  • @PAINNN666
    @PAINNN666 3 роки тому

    Jon + TABS = perfect combo.

  • @derekcase7261
    @derekcase7261 3 роки тому

    Jon I love your videos and have been watching for years. Thank you for all the wonderful content. Much love man.

  • @Zenturio331
    @Zenturio331 3 роки тому

    I love this game! Please play more!!

  • @kingoftherevolution4855
    @kingoftherevolution4855 3 роки тому +1

    Well this can be nothing but fun

  • @PoisonInc
    @PoisonInc 3 роки тому +1

    AND ALONG CAME ZEUS

  • @valguz7196
    @valguz7196 3 роки тому +1

    Petition for a chill Townscaper livestream

  • @realgamergirl4638
    @realgamergirl4638 3 роки тому

    War.
    War never changes.

  • @movingparts6270
    @movingparts6270 3 роки тому

    Me: Didn't Jon play this a few months ago
    Jon: I looked at this a few years ago
    Me: ...oh...

  • @fishpop
    @fishpop 3 роки тому

    Jon's Halfling formation kinda looks like a 29...
    AND THEY ALMOST WON!!!

  • @BDMotorsport
    @BDMotorsport 3 роки тому

    That first battle was so good 😂

  • @Etherealhorn
    @Etherealhorn 3 роки тому +1

    I didn't know I needed this.

  • @librarianseth5572
    @librarianseth5572 3 роки тому

    Day 362 of Requesting Zoo Tycoon. This was unexpected, but welcome. Jon messing with crap like this is a highlight of life

  • @flowerpunkgal7553
    @flowerpunkgal7553 3 роки тому +4

    If you timed it earlier, could've used this fantastically realistic tool to predict the various UK elections, like you used to do with Worms

  • @D4VCoriginal
    @D4VCoriginal 3 роки тому +1

    Actually Jon you can control them

  • @xdeser2949
    @xdeser2949 3 роки тому

    tabs came to my attention because of giantbomb, but now its reminding me of giantbomb, so, rip.

  • @DearWenger
    @DearWenger 3 роки тому

    I've seen this game played a lot but various people and never once have I seen the fun or enjoyment.
    "Hurr hurr I send 1,000 chickens against a t-rex, hurr this fun"
    But then Jon gave it a go and I know I'd get something honest from him....
    So the fact that even Jon can only _just_ stretch this video out to 30 mins shows how painfully thin on content and fun this game is.

    • @Sacharias1
      @Sacharias1 3 роки тому +1

      Considering the fact that neither chickens nor t-rexes are in the game you might be thinking of another battle sim.
      I think a better representation of the enjoyment of this game can be found in the Steam reviews, where it's currently sitting at "Overwhelmingly Positive" with 98% of the reviews being positive.
      U lil negative nancy

    • @DearWenger
      @DearWenger 3 роки тому

      @@Sacharias1 Well that almost helps me prove my point, this game is so samey with other "hilarious" battle sims that its shtick is entirely indistinguishable from the rest. (Ultimate Epic Battle Simulator
      was the trex/chickens battle for the record).
      You might form your opinions based on other people's opinions but I prefer to form my own, and like I said, this game looks catastrophically dull. Even Jon, the master of eeking out video lengths, could only stretch this out to 30mins and you could tell by the end that his fake enthusiasm for the game was waning. People seem to like goat sim and plague inc too but they are right in this "play for 5 minutes, laugh, discard" genre of basic white bitch entertainment. These games are the sort of throw away trash flash game you'd play for free 10-15 years ago to waste time at work. Now apparently they're worth £10-£15.
      Fuck that.

    • @Sacharias1
      @Sacharias1 3 роки тому

      ​@@DearWenger You being unable to distinguish between games doesn't prove anything other than your own ignorance. I've played the game for upwards of 50 hours. It's a really fun puzzle game, especially when playing campaigns from the Steam workshop.

    • @DearWenger
      @DearWenger 3 роки тому

      @@Sacharias1 congratulations. You must be so proud. I am so overwhelmed with emotion that you've had fun playing this game.
      That doesn't in any way detract from the fact that this game is boringly similar to other "comedy" battle sims.
      Nor does it change the fact that this game, on my enjoyment scale, looks painfully thin on content and completely lacking in any entertainment whatsoever.
      I thought maybe I had missed the point of it.
      But then you see Jon struggling to make a normal length video, coupled with his clear disinterest in it at the end and I get pretty satisfied that I haven't missed anything.
      If it tickles your fancy, then great. I couldn't care less. Nothing you say will change my conclusions about this game; it's expensive, joyless, bottom-of-the-barrel trash-comedy and therefore shit and instantly missable.

    • @Sacharias1
      @Sacharias1 3 роки тому

      ​@@DearWenger Cool, I can see how a reasonable person would have that strong of an opinion of a game that they haven't even played. It's also €15, hardly expensive. Maybe you should give it a shot, you'd probably find that there's a lot of strategy and creativity to the campaigns.

  • @Reishadowen
    @Reishadowen 3 роки тому

    When your Hobbits upgrade to "Mob-it"s.