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All she said was basically that the relationship became way too codependent and it made them forget themselves and change in some negative ways she wants to undo. Once he does that as well, and they're both in a healthier space, there's a chance for them to get back together. I don't know why people are putting words in her mouth. This is literally all she said and its mature as fuck. It's not good to be THAT codependent with your partner to the point that you cant walk anywhere by yourself anymore and need to be speaking to them almost 24/7. That's not healthy. Everyone should still maintain their individuality even in a relationship. Props to Liz for realizing this and for taking the necessary steps to amend that. I hope both of them the best and I hope they work on whatever they need to work on to become stronger and healthier individually and maybe some day together once again.
Thankyou, someone that actually listened and understood what I said! I have been broken up already for a month now, made new friends and finally starting to get back to myself. I’m very happy at this point and so is my ex! We still go to occasional lunches together, text daily and he saw this video and totally supports everything I said. 🙏🏻♥️♥️♥️
You know whats best for you. Period. Im so happy the both of you are coming back to yourselves during this time. Dont ever sacrifice the essence of who you are for someone else, thats not what a healthy relationship should be for anyone. Love you xx @@Thewizardliz
Please be respectful and don’t try to say there wasn’t any love because I’m not “really” sad. I have mourned this relationship already, I cried my whole eyes out. And he is truly one of the only people I have ever loved. I still love him just not romantically. It’s very complicated for me to share something this personal however I have always been honest from the beginning and it would be a shame if I didn’t update you about a big change in my life and my healing journey. I love you all so much, I’m so grateful for each and everyone of you. Thankyou 🙏🏻♥️♥️♥️
I admire you so much, really. I really look up to you, thank you for sharing this, I've grown so much during the past year, and I found your channel when you were just starting, such a big blessing. You're so strong, thank you Liz, from the bottom of my heart ❤
No, putting yourself first is selfish, self love is when you know your worth and what you deserve and respect yourself and working on yourself without putting pressure on yourself, not thinking about nothing but yourself!
@@mennaelgendy_ your definition of self love is exactly what she described in the video though, so i’m confused about what you disagree with? she realized she needed to heal more and that doing so alone would be the best for both parties involved, how is that selfish?
3:23 what she says here is her partner didn't really help her with her goals. In a healthy relationship, you both elevate each other. Not selfish but more of helping each other out
@@mennaelgendy_ you fucking kidding, right? if i don't put myself first, if i don't think of myself who the fuck else is going to do it? it's literally me, of course i have to put myself first.
How u feeling rn? I just left my boyfriend for the same reason. I got way too comfortable and stop evolving myself to become a better person. He thinks I am perfect, but I want to be my dream woman.
You know what else is fascinating about her? That after all her personal realisations and preachments, after all her inner work on her spiritual and mental growth, she is still learning and not being afraid to show us!!! She proves it is okay to feel lost for a while, it is okay when something goes imperfect way in life. Thank you so much Liz, now I feel you are much closer to us we love you
Exactly!! Even though Liz gives us great advice and is living her dream life, she's still human after all. She's still prone to make mistakes, tackle harships, and find new meaning to her life as time goes on. Even though I already have respect for her, she has increased the amount of respect I have for her just from this video.
@@Avi.joyyy12 It's easy when someone buys an old yt account that already has million subscriber and then decided to talk about her life while living with a rich partner. It's the same girl who talks about getting a rich guy and not a broke one in her old videos making fun of them. Now she says she is much stronger and can't co depend on your partner LOL what a clown.
@@pascalramael5678 people lie and change, u can't really know someone until u spend a long time with them, just be grateful u discovered it before marriage
In psychology they say that when you grow up in a toxic environment when you are a child that becomes your normal .. so when you get in a good relationship you feel something wrong because you are not familiar with that.. the feeling of being happy or comfortable is not normal to you so you sabotage yourself .. I recommend you to hear to sadiapsycology she will open your eyes and help you to recognize your patterns
The way that I interpreted the video is that she was sabotaging herself by staying in the relationship. I totally agree with that you’re saying, but I don’t think it applies here
I’m gonna watch this 100 times Liz. Every day. I got out of a relationship where I thought I was going to marry him and he left. So I’m dealing with the aftermath. It’s incredible this message. Please post more breakup stuff.
This is such an important example of how you do not need to stay in a relationship just because it isn’t toxic or unhealthy. i love how she isn’t afraid to remove anything that doesn’t push her and support her growth
I feel like he was leeching off of her and maybe he doesn't have anything going on for himself so he isolated her overtime as well. Their relationship sounded really toxic. Good thing she got out safe.
Don’t let yourself feel like you are trapped in a relationship, if you want to let go of the relationship because it’s hurting you in any way leave,it’s not selfish or bad to leave,because in the end you did it for yourself ❤️. Edit: Thank you for the likes & for knowing ur worth Queens/Kings,love u guysss xx
i feel like im about to end mine coz theres little to no communication and the guy says hes the problem and apologizes but then there is no change..its more of a cycle now....and im tired coz therres no growth. Update: I ended it and I feel happy ✨
@@kpophyunjin He’s probably trying to play the victim, if you feel like the best option is to leave,do it you won’t regret leaving a person who isn’t putting any effort to change. If he’s just apologising but doing nothing to improve the relationship or himself don’t waste your time and ur energy on him girl
@@kpophyunjin I feel like liz would say to not be afraid of the change you will feel when you are not with him anymore. Be content alone and place the energy you gave him on yourself.
This hyper 'self love' and 'i need to put myself first in any situation' and 'i deserve nothing but absolute perfection' is how you end up alone and ironically lowering your self esteem because of it. Knowing when to look past others' flaws and when to put others first is how you end up surrounded by people who reciprocate your kindness and love and support you.
I dont get the contradiction in her beliefs. In some videos she talks about how femininity is all about letting things be, letting it flow, receiving, but now she talks about how shes too comfortable, too dependent on her partner, didnt have her hustle and motivation to make deals because of him. That's not really adding up to what she professes about feminine energy. Shes choosing her career and masculine traits over a partner whos literally providing for her and providing the space for her to be in her feminine. I think there's a lot of confusion in what she wants or thinks she wants, and hey everyone goes through it. I hope the best for her but just pointing out the contradictions that some people might not be observing.
@@user-hqwkhrc4kf-fb brother, I think you’re getting confused, masculinity & femininity has nothing to do with your sexuality nor gender, especially when it comes to your heart 💀 I’ll explain the best way I can: every single human, whether you’re gay, bisexual or straight, should have a balance of both masculinity and femininity in their heart. Without this balance; you’d fall into toxic masculinity/toxic femininity as you’re relying on one yin or Yang instead of BOTH yin and Yang. To grow as a better person, the soul and mindset should have a balance. It’s like this: pretend there is a scenario where a man may rely on his wife to take care of his children and do all the dishes, bath the children, wash their clothes, clean the house. This, you might call a feminine trait. However, you can’t take your wife for granted. If she dies, this duty of cleaning, bathing your children, feeding you children, will fall onto YOU. This is why every human should have a mix between masculinity and femininity. You don’t know what situation God will throw at you, & if you don’t have the skill developed for a situation, then you’re going to be pretty fcked in a situation like this. Hell, cooking is a basic skill. Forget about children, everyone should know how to cook for themselves whether you’re a man or a woman. Don’t underlook cooking as a man just because it’s feminine. And don’t underlook self defence as a woman just because it’s masculine. Both are essential for every human individual.
Nah, honestly I got hurt by this video because it was my ex’s reason to break up with me. The truth is, people are not ready for healthy and comfortable relationship because they have their trauma and they are used to emotional abuse, so when the relationship is healthy they are getting bored. That’s it. I will never understand how one can give up on a person he/she loves. If you feel like you’re lost and have inner problems it doesn’t always mean there is something wrong with your relationship. It’s just a personal crisis that you can’t solve, and it’s always easier to break up as you think the true reason is there. It’s not always like that. Life is too short to give up on soulmates just because you are lost and go through stuff. I hate it that there is so much egoism and nobody cares about other people’s feelings. Relationship is not about one person, it’s always the work of two, and if you’re not ready to find compromise and solve problems why would you even enter a relationship? This all wasn’t about Liz particularly, it’s about people in general.
Yeah I got similar thoughts.. like it's only 4 months If he is your best friend and you love him why not talk about it and work on it together? Break up is just a brutal easy solution to me
This is so incredibly well said. I agree 200%. And the other responses to your comment are just as important. It's been a while since I've seen someone make an intelligent comment and have others agree with it. At least some of us have our head on straight and can recognize these things.
I just feel Liz is avoidant attachment style, being afraid to be merged in a relationship but not knowing how to keep oneself while being inter-dependent. This is not just a maturity thing, also it has nothing to do with love(because they love each other), it is attachment trauma.
@@yourealfr exactly! Like there’s worse issues that come up in relationships. When you live with a significant other it’s easy to become codependent, you set boundaries and make it work you just don’t break up unless you never wanted the relationship. I wonder if there’s more to it than she’s letting on.
Agree. Sometimes we have to put self development books down and go and live and take the lessons along the way. You can feel in the video theirs a disconnect. I wonder if it’s an ego death? A spiritual awakening happening? Like the self dev and growth (which is positive) keeps her close to the version that got her to this abundant state of self esteem and the relationship bringing unveiling her to her true nature. Relationships do that to ya. Fascinating to see. Well, wish her well.
To be fair, you're really not saying anything new. That's basically what she says in the video and recognizes that that's her challenge, and that's why she left a relationship is to work on this and herself. Which is the only way you can really work on that
Well I mean... yes and no. Yes. But also - no. Some of the language you use in my opinion is inherently negative to be honest - "to be merged", "being inter-dependent". I think it's perfectly possible to have healthy, thriving, long term relationships without being 'merged' or 'inter-dependent'. There are as many couples who successfully spend their lives together while living apart (and being financially independent, and maintaining independent social lives) as there are couples who truly successfully stay happy their whole life fully merged. There's really no reason to presume merging and inter-dependence are necessary; that's a value that you hold as a 'valid' attachment - but does it have to be?
@@whoisgalla shes a sil ly hopeless woman but shes worse because shes giving out unhi nged advice to others. Her channel needs to be taken down at once
Nah, this is a perfect representation of the post modern self absorbed dystopian society we live in. People don't have commitment, gratitude or patience anymore. You can be yourself, and still be madly in love. And when you're no longer madly in love, you can still cultivate the spirit of devotion and dedication towards the partner who does the same for you, and it will blossom into love at its own pace again. You wanna change something? Communicate and let your partner know. Work on it together. This man literally paid for her therapy and gave her everything. She didn't like his introverted lifestyle, she should've maintained her own while still being with him. She says he didn't stop her from anything, so why is she out here playing the victim and shaming the poor man. She got bored, she left. This is sick. Don't end things just because it's easy. Just because you can. No wonder divorce rates are the highest they've ever been in history.
@bellaxnyc you're absolutely right, she has a modern women mindset like Kevin Samuels said. Her boyfriend is a provider, a faithful men help her to get better and, she has the audacity to ended the relationship because she is bored. She only want to see her option in the street. Once she will go on the street and find the amont of cheater and narcissistic men, and she will be lost by the hookup culture, she will want to come back to her ex. I hope he will find a wife who will appreciate him for who he is. That type of men is gold in our generation.
Literally why me and my ex broke up. We both said that we had lost who we are in the relationship, and we need to find our individual selves first before we can be happy again. This really helped me process what's going on, because I too lost my spark for life and it's a tough spot to be in but everything will get better because it always does!
going through this feeling right now in a relationship... and i know my bf has codependency issues,.. and i think i do too. i have felt so unhappy with myself and my life lately. i feel like i can't fully pour the focus and love back into myself FOR me to make myself happy first. it's seemed so hard to stick to any habits or goals i've been trying to start and commit too. it feels like too much. i miss being single and having my full energy to direct towards bettering myself, being happy with myself, and working towards my goals again without havibg to worry about someone else and their feelings. i know i shouldn't feel selfish feeling this way but part of me does, and i think that is the people-pleaser and abandonment trauma in me coming out. just having such a difficult time coming to this realization with full honesty and making the decision i know that needs to happen.... cuz i know it will hurt regardless. :/
@@earth2jade why you don't get w therapy, maybe will help you. I have seen a korean serial. I know is movie but a women have lost herself in relationship that she has cause she have a trauma from another break up and she broke with the this guy cause she wanted to find herself. But they could not stay away from each other. In the end this guy tell this women LET FIND OURSELF BIT TOGETHER. SO BOTH HAVE FOUND EACH OTHER ESPECIALLY THE GIRL WITHOUT BREAKING UP FOREVER. BOTH GIVE SPACE EACH OTHER
You’re a great example for all women. Never prioritize a man, they wouldn’t do it for you, women are socialized into believing it’s normal and expected for them to give up themselves for men, but you have the power to say no, I come first.
Hey this is a heads up that thinking that way is harmful!! Like idk what conditioned you to think in the same way as others think that “all men are bad” but that way it won’t really manifest
people don’t realize that relationships can really drain you. it’s amazing to have that connection with somebody who is truly on your vibration, but vibration is always shifting, and sometimes, our time with the person is only meant to last a little while until we get to our next chapter. people view relationships in a really co dependent way and they assume it’s supposed to last forever but it doesn’t, NOTHING lasts forever. thanks for sharing your journey and perspective Liz, it’s really eye opening.
@@ximenadelriovery true. And I keep wondering what's going to happen when she gets married. Like when she doesn't feel the vibrations, will she get a divorce
The trick is do be able to do the things you want to do while in a relationship. Seperation might help bring you back into balance but it's a whole different thing maintaining that with a person. It's all about: No matter what the conditions I can mainatin my habits and my peace and joy. I don't have to control conditions because it's always me and me. You don't have to be seperate to have fire . The art is being in a relationship while being two individuals with passions yet making space for both to exist simultaneously without codependency.
@@Sagespirit111it is 😅 I think I lost myself in some way in all my relationships. Honestly have no idea how to stop this endless loop. But mostly I feel like this is my own problem and not depends on my partner
@Julie_Lovely you should look into attachment theory. You might be a fearful avoidant. I do this every time as well mostly because I had to protect myself emotionally as a child it translated to my adulthood. I'm now trying to retrain my brain but it's not easy. It takes a lot of work and meditation. Sometimes also, we can heal up or heal down from someone that we are with and I think in those cases it's okay to leave. The last thing you want is to share your precious energies with someone that doesn't give energies back
I love this so much. Thank you. I'm single for 5 years now and this video still helps me to be MORE ready when I finally want to be in a relationship again. In the meantime, there's a lot of stuff to work with only myself and that's good. Loveee
The real relationship is where you support each others’ goals while working on yours. The real relationship is where you want to succeed together. The real relationship is where you work hard on your goals while you also pray for your partner’s success.
Man she just wasn’t comfortable with the relationship cause she was getting too attached and was losing connection with herself, stop misunderstanding it
Can we all agree that she is so real for this. Becuse like she could just come here and talk about self love and be in a relationship that made her care about herself less, but she realized the problem, ended it and said what needs to be said. Love you Liz, I hope you'll get your happiness back on top. ❤❤
I relate to this so much my best friend and i decided to give our friendship some time in order to heal ourselves. We were becoming extremely attached to each other and it was getting into a real toxic point, so as Liz says we have prioritized ourselves instead of losing us to the friendship
Moral of the video is that it's *very* important to have a life and ambition outside your relationship. While I do think it's an issue one could communicate before breaking up, I'm sure you tried or that there's more to it that we as viewers simply don't know and that's fine. I have a friend that ended a 6 year relationship for the same reason and it's not been an easy path for them but it may have been the right one.
This is sooo so true! Everyone does come into your life for a reason. My ex was my lesson, he made me realise that I don't value myself enough and that I don't put myself first. He made me realise that I'm an anxious person with relationships in my life and that I'm such a people pleaser. I hate when people say "all that just become strangers again" yes the end result might be the same as it started as in being strangers, but you yourself are not the same as before you met that person in your life. They taught you a lesson, that will then allow you to grow and work on yourself. No one will ever be satisfied with anything nor themselves, so you'll always find something you want to improve and that is okay, life is a roller coaster and it goes on and on, that person who is your ex as much as they may have mistreated you or maybe they were a good person it doesn't matter, they tought you something, even if you may not realise it yet, and they just wasn't for you, God has pushed them out of the way for something better for you, not worse!
working on those things while still being in a relationship is the only way to truly solve the issue at hand. working on urself while single won’t fix a problem that u have when ur in a relationship. ur not working on the problem while being single ur getting back to the things u used to do. when u get in a relationship again it will be the same thing over again bc the relationship was never the problem.
I share your opinion. In a relationship, we both have to put in the effort. If there's a problem, you need to discuss it, talk about it, and try to find a solution together as a couple. However, we do what we believe is best for us at the time. Realisation sometimes comes much later in life.
I felt the same as you for a year. nobody understood me, they criticized me and convinced me to stay with my ex. I took pills to calm myself down, to get rid of anxiety. I also went to therapy trying to change my pattern of attractiveness. In the end we broke up. Sometimes it's good to do what you feel.
literally same! everyone was convincing me to stay and i knew deep down that the best decision was to leave but i didn’t have the courage to do so. 1 month later i left without overthinking it. was sad the first days, then nothing. i felt liberated
There is probably more to the story than what she’s sharing, most relationships that get too comfortable like this is probably cause the sex life has become boring or non existent
@@liaa4172exactly. you can’t get too comfortable in relationship because if you do, you stop trying and doing certain things that make relationship flourish and lovely. hard to stay happy in relationship when you don’t feel loved :((
I really hope he finds someone else and never go back to this subtly toxic lizard. I feel bad for him being fooled by this "self growth" noble sounding bs reason for break up. When basically the relationship was healthy & stable. Well, maybe not so healthy because she is unhealthy person to be in relationship with.
@@intuitivevibes1818not everything is meant to last. You’re taking this way more seriously than Liz is. Just because something is perfect doesn’t mean it has to stay or last. Life goes on. There is no need to call her out her name.
@@shaysimson6951 You have no idea what kind of bs you are defending here. Go watch her video from past where she also did broke up with previous guy where everything was okay. She is only novelty seeker. She is blaming her current boyfriend for her getting lazy (and not spending that much time doing her hobbies). When actually nothing was directly stopping her to do so. Are you seriously defending this? Think twice next time before commenting.
@@intuitivevibes1818 where in the video is she blaming and saying it’s her ex’s fault? No where. I don’t know what you are so upset about. Are you the guy she dumped? If she wants to leave something good she can. Why do her choices affect your life?
I’m in the exact same situation since a week now and omg, that feels so weird but reassuring to hear that I’m not alone, to hear the words that describe exactly the thoughts that I got for 7 days now. And I think that it has helped me a lot, so thank you so much Liz.
this is exactly me and my partner. she did the thing (breaking up) that i didn't have the courage to do. now i'm working on myself and it's so much better.
Ended my relationship a couple months ago. I had a similar dynamic to you where we were each other's everything. I'm also looking forward to getting myself back, working towards my goals, and learning more about what I like and want. I used to be very outgoing and developed social anxiety from my relationship. Gonna be single for a while. I missed being single. To all the newly single girls out there, we got this!!! Time to level up. :)
I did the mistake, and I didn’t take break from relationship when my intuition told me, it took very bad place, and we both did huge mistakes, and now we have this pain, however we ended the relationship now, and have same same love and bond,,, but sometimes we just need to do what our intuition tells us)❤️
It's rather common for us ladies to forget our own needs, interests and make that person and that relationship the main priority. It's almost like an escape from yourself and then we end up resenting this man and the person we've become when with him.
Liz, I'm sorry but I'm not sure about this one. I understand what you say, sometimes being in a really long term relationship can be suffocating, but make sure you're not losing something really important just because you need a little space. I understand you're being very successful right now, you have a big audience and many people love you and support you, but trust me, real love from a partner is never to be taken for granted. I'm speaking from experience.. I've been in a long term relationship with someone who loved me a lot. We had a very strong bond but I eventually felt like I needed to get some space because I wasn't living my life fully like I wanted to (and I was also trying to find myself). When we broke up, I felt relieved and I was sure I could find love very easily after a couple of months. Just like you, I am a very attractive girl and I never had trouble attracting men. But now, 2 years after being single, I realized that even if i have many options, true love isn't to be found everywhere. A lot of men come to me, but they don't get truly interested in who I am and my personality. They're more fascinated by the image of who I am, my energy, my smile. Finding someone who's actually willing to listen to you, cares about you, wants to help you, and wants to be there for you is rare and very precious. Don't think that you will find better than him just because you may feel powerful at the moment. Those things are a blessing. Real and deep connections are a blessing. Also, you talk a lot about the importance of having a good relationship with yourself. Sure that is important, but know that you will never be fully self sufficient no matter how independant you are. Humans are not meant to be emotionally self sufficient. Whether you like it or not, we are codependent creatures. Trying to practise full self detachment at all cost will end up breaking you. Anyways, I hope this single phase will lead you to where you want to be. You will probably enjoy your single life at the beginning, but eventually life is going to feel pretty lonely after a while and you will miss what you had. Sometimes men love us so much, they become too nice and too generous with us. Passion disappears and we take them for granted. This space time will give good lessons to both you.
I am absolutely agree with your point. I have the same situation. It passed 2,5 years after my last long relationship and l can’t find person who would appreciate me but l also thought that it will be so easy, not at all. I was saying myself okay this is time to understand who l am, what l am looking in this life. And now l understand that l was able to do it being in the relationship. It would be harder but it’s real. Any Relationships need that both people work in it.
Last year I broke up with my boyfriend for about the same reason. He may was a very good guy but I had lost myself, we wanted different things, we didn't do anything together, he only liked to have fun with friends, I had lost my femininity. Almost a year later, not only was I relieved but I discovered my true self! Grateful for that!❤😊
Bro something very similar happened to me as well it's been 2 months I broke up with my bf of 4 years and I feel so light happy feminine and relaxed....
Do you ever feel she just turns on UA-cam and says whatever she wants to say to herself like recording your own pep talk for yourself it could be good for yourself but everything a person says in a self pep talk not everything is right to share with everybody people might get wrongly guided without understanding the context in which that particular thing was said . This thought just came on my mind I wanted it to let out so I did it here that's all :)
Talking to older generations and personal experiences made me realise that you should always put yourself first people will say it’s narcissistic but as long as you are not hurting people nor yourself , it’s okay if someone or something is not serving you your highest purpose , you should let them go : you may feel guiltier about being with them whilst knowing you do not truly want them if you are letting go of yourself or not focusing on yourself BECAUSE of your relationship , you have all rights to break up
"as long as you're not hurting people nor yourself, it's okay" What about the guy whose heart just got broken? Why even pretend to give a damn about a person if you'll just abandon them when things aren't totally perfect? Working things out before you bail is what a good person does. Unless the other person is a psycho, then they're human too and should be treated like a human being. This "self help" content is such narcissistic garbage.
@@validskepticismI think Liz may have communicated with him beforehand about why they needed to seperate. Obviously if she blindsided him, then it's wrong because he has feelings as well. We should always love ourselves and do what's best for us, but we also need to understand that our decisions can also impact the people around us as well. As humans, thinking only of ourselves is inherently narcissistic. Liz was thinking of both her and her partners life, and how to better themseleves and she concluded that they'd both do better separated.
@pa-dn1vh u act like being single and having no kids is a bad thing 😂😂 statisticlly women who arent married and have no kids tend to have a better, more fulfilling and successful life. stop projecting ur fears onto women, you men arent that important!😊
Ya'll you don't have to leave your parter to learn being whole again and focus on yourself!!!! Took me ages to get that but it's true. Do you think 30,40 years of marriage last when people break up after each periodically in life popping up identity crisis?! Relationship is work, it's a battle, realising that it would be way more easy to leave but staying cause you made a decision. I'm not saying what she's doing is wrong or weak. It's a choice. But that choice can become a pattern and then you end up switching partners or breaking love each time you disconnect to yourself. This can't be the solution unless you deep down prefer to live a rather uncommitted life.
I say her man is happy now. I'm a girl but if I was a guy dating her, I'd be suffocated from paying ALL her bills. It doesn't feel good knowing that the only reason she's with me is for MONEY.@@cleansing132
While I agreed with her, I do agree with you too. She could stay with her partner, go to couples therapy, go to single therapy, work on herself and her partner and that can be so much harder than being single tbh. Relationships are too much work. But if nothing else was wrong in her relationship, she could give therapy a shot. They could try communicating and work on themselves while being together. They could also take some space, hibernate and stuff
Agree! Toxic relationship is not only the reason why two people break up. Some might think it is weird for someone to feel distant because of being too comfortable in the relationship, but it really does happen.
Liz thanks for being so upfront. You are also extremely young and there is NOTHING WRONG WITH NOT WANTING TO SETTLE! You are bettering yourself, you’re being a better you and that’s all that matters. As long as you are okay, that is all that matters.
Liz honey, although you mention that there was nothing wrong in your relationship, your words say otherwise. A relationship does not have to be toxic for you to leave. If your partner was clingy and couldn't function without you, that's an indication of a problem. If you felt like you were losing yourself and lost motivation, that's also an indication of a problem. Sounds like you both need to work on yourselves and be single for a little bit. If you're meant for each other, you'll definitely get back together.
Nothing new... Narcissistic self-obssesed people usually attract needy antisocial people as partners. Both types of people are very similar, they both live for validation and at the end of the day they are looking for a dad or a mom. If you are a grown adult you already know this, if you are really young or even a teenager, believe me, you will undertand this at some point of your life.
@@ximenadelrioI understand what you mean. I also understand what Liz means, but I also agree with your opinion. I like Liz, I even love her. Independence is needed even in relationships. Her reasons are reasonable, even to the point of breaking up, but here I feel there is something I can't explain, I smell narcissism.
Part of being in a good relationship is building each other up and encouraging one another to accomplish their goals, encouraging one another to become better overall in all areas where they could improve
I really needed this video to get assured that ending a relationship for your own good is valid! Last year I ended a relationship for the same reason. I was just not working hard anymore. And after I broke up, the hate on me was insane! I did it for myself and I do not feel sorry. You go Liz!
I feel that. I dated a guy from Colombia. I was sending him money. I lost myself. I was doing way too much for him and I couldn't even pay my rent at one point because I was constantly sending him money. He didn't want to grow or take care of himself. We broke up and it hurt me but it was necesary. I couldn't love myself or help myself.
@@Sonicxis4everYou began to match his energy. I could not be more proud of you. He wouldn’t dare end the relationship because it benefits him. You made the right call and it truly is a shame that he wouldn’t step up for you like you would for him. Better for you to cut your losses before it stacks up even more so. I’ve been in a similar situation. I wish I could have seen them for who they were rather than the image of what they wanted me to see. When I ended things, they didn’t care to
Liz, coming from someone who has been single for 22 years a.k.a. my whole life this gives me so much comfort to hear. I haven’t found anyone that matches my energy yet and brings out the full potential in me so I decline all girlfriend invitations as they do not serve me. However, how are you not so afraid of letting someone go that at one point served you so well? Don’t you get scared you won’t find that feeling again?
I was single until I was 25 for the same reason, I could only imagine myself with someone that matched my energy, otherwise I’d rather stay single. At the same time I got into my first (and only) relationship I started my growth journey and realized my partner and the relationship itlself was pushing me back. It was a short relationship, in a matter of months we were not in sync anymore and I decided to leave. I’m very happy for my decision and single again. ❤ I know I will be with someone in the same energy level, at the moment let’s enjoy our singleness ✨
@@AyaNichelle-gi9cd I personally felt the same way as Ashley! I noticed when I head out with a certain group or spend time with a certain girlfriend, I feel so drained at the end of each session. The girls also do not have the same goal in life as I do. It would be a waste of our time and energy to be spending time with people who do not "serve us". Hope this helps :)
no? she said that she was getting very codependent and she didnt want that. people arent supposed to want to talk with their partners 24/7, you need to still have some individuality. also its her decision, so who are you to judge..
have you watched the video before leaving this inconsiderate comment? She literally said she was being too comfortable in the relationship and it made her unable to be independent anymore. Plus she wasn't self-motivated anymore which is not a good thing.
@meatloaf690 Girl bfrrr and is breakup a solution!!! What she needed was a balance and have more time for herself!. Yes it's her choice buy since she posted it as an advice she shouldn't expect no criticism. I'm surprised that you all defend her advice blindly ! Once you mature you will realise that relationships have downs and falls, if you have her mindset, you will never have a healthy relationship
I’m not speaking about Liz, but felt it important to comment here as a recovered intimacy avoider: just make sure you aren’t in a pattern of leaving relationships anytime they get peaceful because it’s ‘boring’. I used to do this, and I was miserable. There are absolutely times when you’re truly not attracted to a person in a larger sense, and it’s not necessarily a toxic situation, but just remember that comfort is a normal part of a long term relationship. You won’t find longterm passion or motivation in a new relationship if you have underlying issues. As Liz said, you have to work to get that passion, especially after the honeymoon phase. It’s totally possible, but not if you always leave. So again, I’m not speaking to Liz, I’m speaking to the people who might need to ask some hard questions. ❤
My Mom used to tell me it can be harder at times to leave something that is not forcing you to leave but that you genuinely feel in your heart is not right for you. And now in my life it makes (sixth) sense. It's choosing what is best for you. And only you know what that is. No one needs to understand your journey but you.💗
Im so proud of you Liz! Not everyone understands what its like to put themselves first! Its never too late. Thank you for being so transparent with your words ❤
Instead of talking through it, like a mature couple, she ends the whole relationship. People need to start learning how to KEEP a relationship by KEEPING on fixing it not just having one.
i see everyone saying 'communication is key' like an npc but yall dont get it when u try to communicate the issue with some people they either deny, don't understand or manipulate u. it RARELY works. u can put ur heart into a whole pharagraph and the person ur dealing with can reply to the most unimportant part. some people dont have the perfect skills and communication isn't always the best option
Everybody talk about finding yourself and puting yourself in first place, because they aren't receive something in relationship. But nobody talk about giving your time and energy into something. In life sometimas our dear persons have hard time and they need us. You don't leave person you love during hard time. Relationships aren't easy or always beautiful. You have hard time and you have good time.
I was in a relationship for 6 years and I think I completely lost myself. It's hard for me to wake up without him, to do something without his support, it's so terrible. I really want to find myself again, love and enjoy. Thank you Liz, your videos give me great support!
so glad that she mentioned that sometimes its godd to listen to ur own intuition. I know I need to detach from people so this video came at the right time💕
Thank you so much, I'm from France and I just find your youtube channel. This video resume exactly my situation with my partner, I'm still with him and I have a lot of questions in my mind, I think I m scared to end my relationship but your video is perfect and it helps me, thank you again.
Sharing something this personal by yourself is in this society something really brave, yet scary. My honest view on this whole situation is for everyone to really “listen to your own intuition” (as in the video stated). Because people go through so many weird, hurtful things that there is a million ways of adapting and moving on. You just gotta align with yourself, with your soul and find your own solution.
this was so helpful. i’ve been in a 7 month relationship and we just ended it and continued as a freindrelationship because i have such a good connection with him, before i dated him i was working out, doing face workouts, eating healthy and feeling skinny and positive. after i started dating him it’s like he was all i though about and i never wanted that to happen but it happened anyway. i stopped doing my workouts, face workouts, i know i’m not at my highest and i’ve known for months but i kept thinking it’ll get better and it never did. as much as he tried giving me compliments and trying to motivate me i didn’t feel like myself, just from watching this video i think i have the courage to end it. i miss being single and dating myself and loving myself. i was at my best.
The saddest thing about this video is the amount of comments that are like "This is what I needed. I'm gonna break up with my partner of Xamount of years. Wish me luck". If you need an excuse to break up your relationship, sure take her words for it. Maybe it was the right decision for her (even though I disagree but that's just me), doesn't mean it's for you. Use your own head before making big decisions! I get the whole "I need to focus on myself and my goals ect". Guess what? You can do that WHILE IN A RELATIONSHIP. If you feel like you can't do that, it's a YOU problem, not a RELATIONSHIP problem. And maybe that's why you need to find an excuse or a reason to break up, maybe something else is missing that you don't realise or want to face. Personally I think a relationship should be a healthy and safe environment where you can be yourselves and grow together. AKA, being comfortable with each other. That means you go through the ups and lows together. Even when you feel like you're letting yourself go, or the other person does. A relationship should be a safe place for you to rest when you need to and pick yourself up again when you're able to. Partners support each other, love each other. If you feel like something is missing, COMMUNICATE! If you feel like you're not trying hard enough, TALK ABOUT IT. Support each other. Love isn't just the honeymoon phase and when everything and everyone is perfect. Things fade, things evolve. Things change, doesn't mean it's for the worse. I just really miss the time when people cared enough about their relationships and strived for the better TOGETHER, until they became an old couple. Happy together. Seems so rare these days... That's my take on it. Thanks if you read so far. That's her decision and her journey. All I want to say is, don't use this video as the reason you were searching for because you can't face yourself. Please think first. Feel first. A long term relationship doesn't equal a boring one. Take care.
You just realized the dynamic in social media. Most influencers are not geniuses, not artists, not inventors, not heroes, nor martires, nor prophets, not saints, they are influencers... they are not famous because they are special or because they have work to develop hard skills, but because they are average, they are a perfect reflection of the society they live in, because they are mirrors and they validate the audience's thoughts and feelings. Majority of the population no longer want to see extraordinary people putting the bar high, not anymore, they want ordinary people who make them feel less disappointed in their own lives and who are not so different from them, who give them the illusion that we can all do everything. And that is not true. Anyone can be remarkable, anyone... not everyone. Of course there is nothing wrong about being average at all, it's ok. So everyone today want to believe that their inmaturity and lack of character is "ok", so this types of influencers are here to validate that desire. Youngest generations only know to say "OMG, you are just like me."
You described it all so well. I wish more people realize that you can improve when you are in relationship. You do not need to throw away everything to "become the best version of yourself". Not everything in life will be always perfect just as our relationships. Why not to try growing togehter. Nowadays we give up to early and real conection between two loving people is not that easy to find.
I was about to say, a lot of people here don’t realize they’re the problem. They rather just claim every issue pointed out about them is a projection. They also refuse to think for themselves otherwise.
I completely agree. I feel also like ppl are expecting always the best from relationships, but forget that there are also lows (getting too comfotable). Why not talking to your partner about this. Honestly ppl are so blended about this "healthy and happy"social media relationship bullshit.
On a psychological perspective, this video doesn't surprise me at all because I always found it amusing how she had such a toxic childhood but still managed to be in a consensual relationship for a long time.. The father figure (the only man a child will look upto) was basically abusive and destructive in Liz's life, this causes the child to grow an dislike towards men subconsciously and it's totally understandable, I'm glad she's taking her time to heal and feel better. But I still hold her responsible for entering into a relationship while she was clearly not mentally prepared to be in one, and that's why I strongly disagree with the people in the comment section saying "I'm so proud of you Liz" because there's nothing to be proud of. Imagine being proud of a man for leaving his loyal girlfriend because he wanted to be single, not something to be proud of, right? It's the same thing over here.
Imagine being proud of a man for leaving his loyal girlfriend - happens all the time though Men cheat on the loyal girlfriend all the time and other men celebrate them for it. The ACTUAL difference here is that men only leave when replacement is in place while women sometimes leave to be single.
I resonate with this so much. I just kept thinking through this video I can’t agree because I do want my next safe and healthy relationship to be my forever home. As long as it stays that way I think it’s important to be committed. But I’m no guru so my perspective could be warped too. This is an interesting perspective she’s providing and I always appreciate her transparency.
@@huntsman145 that might be true, but why should we commit the same mistake as men? If men are leaving their partner, that doesn't mean that women can repeat the same thing to another man, if we continue to leave every relationship just because we got way too "comfortable", this would be a sad world to live in. The fact that Liz was comfortable in saying that she left her boyfriend because she wanted to be single is utterly wrong. Her boyfriend probably did NOTHING wrong to deserve this I agree that she's been through a lot of trauma and is still healing.. but If we all continue to praise this kind of behaviour, the whole idea of being in a long term relationship would become bland and distasteful, It isn't going to affect anyone but ourselves. Liz is an high value woman with a successful career from whom we can learn alot from,there's no denying in that. But frankly, she isn't the person that we should be taking relationship advices from
I’m happy for you and I wish us all the best in standing up for selves and what we really want mostly with our relationship with self-and others just add to it.
as someone who was in the exact same situation, she is RIGHT. me and my ex weren’t mature enough to take the decision that liz and her ex did, so, as a result of isolation and self-neglect, the relationship turned toxic and eventually we broke up in a really ugly way. so yeah, break up & work on yourselves before it’s too late.
She's a person too, nobody's life is totally perfect from every angle, just because she advise us to be happy doesn't means that she herself can't have bad and unhappy days or challenging phase in her life. It's a huge thing that she's even sharing that private part of her life with us so respect her. More power to you, you're literally a wonder woman ❤️
i honestly relate to all of this. I stopped doing my own hobbies, didn't really try to find new friends, and it's as if he's the only person that I socialize with. got too comfortable that it feels like i'm no longer growing as person. it's like i put my life on hold because of him and good thing I realized it early on. (liz and other youtuber really helped me) and i started to actually make some time for journaling my thoughts, listening to youtube videos like these, affirming myself, and it wasn't easy but i'm starting to really love myself. told my bf this and he's really proud of me. anyways, just a lil rant. and to Liz! Thanks for sharing this to us! sending you hugs!
@@Michael-ko8ufshe is not blaming him!! She’s actually blaming her inner self codependency can get really bad when you start relying on a person, u can ofcourse work on yourself and gain back your fire while still being in a relationship and that’s totally fine, they decided that working on themselves separately is better and thats also fine. You choose ur own way of evolving
Yeah Liz, same with you. I ended our 5th years relationship, it hurts so much. But I need to save myself from a man who doesnt appreciate me and relationship anymore. Even when I got hospitalized, he didnt visit me 😢 I need to wake up, I need to take care of myself, I need to love myself, I need to be kind to myself, I need to courage myself to achieve and support anything she wants to do. thank you for this video, Liz! ❤
I don’t get why people get dramatic when someone ELSE ends THEIR relationship like it’s literally your life and your decision it doesn’t affect anyone so be proud of yourself liz. Don’t forget how many young girls you saved 💗💗💗
I was in relationship with a really narcissistic people and since I found out this channel I started to value myself more and that got him mad I started to love myself more and I had the courage to leave After all that he tried to ruin my reputation just because I left I can say that I’m a better person now I know what I want,what I deserve and I’ll never settle for less I’m the priority and all that is the benefit of your advice 🙏
Yes to this… it’s very easy to be co dependent on one another! She is being honest and open about why the relationship wasn’t working for her. I can totally relate I focus on my partner too much when in relationships as it revolves around them and their needs whilst avoiding what I need to work on myself. Your amazing for sharing xx
You legit just stated my problem. Thank you for being authentically you and allowing me to step into the same freedom. You feel crazy but its like EVERYTHING inside your body is telling you this person is not for your highest and it is because you're trying to step into a better version of yourself but the other person is mirroring back your old qualities you're trying to break away from.
*❤️Only God knows how much grateful i am. After so much struggles I now own a new house and my family is happy once again everything is finally falling into place!!*
@@amalmberg13Wow...I know her too she is a licensed broker and a FINRA agent she is popular in US and Canada she is really amazing woman with good skills and experience.
You don’t need a “good reason” to end a relationship. Simply wanting to end it is good reason enough. I ended a relationship a few years ago simply b/c it took up so much of my time that I wasn’t striving towards other goals as much. Even when I would try, I’d get distracted by my BF and so while that was good, my relationship with myself felt neglected. It made me sad which eventually made me resent the person I was with, even though it wasn’t their fault. I was also with someone who was content complaining about their life but doing nothing about it. I didn’t want that to rub off.
liz, i just wanted to thank you for making this video. recently, i broke up with my boyfriend and i was feeling bad at myself for doing it, because i was not feeling as sad as i felt i was supposed to and i could only think about myself. i loved him and i would do anything for him, but at some point i was neglecting my own needs, what i really wanted, and thought this type of sacrifices were normal. but thanks to your video i was reassured that abdicating of the life i truly wanted to live wasn't finding a middle ground, and this would only make me unhappy. i'm feeling much better about myself now and i'm happy i decided to sound egotistical and think about myself once, you're really a nice soul and i hope you know you're helping a lot of people out there. take care, liz!
The fact that you don’t feel passionate about your goals anymore is not his fault. Healthy relationship is not about fire and passion, it’s about commitment and peace. Remembering what you’ve said before, that you grew up in constant stress at home, you simply do not feel “at home” in healthy relationships. You strive under stress and in toxic relationships, but you feel bored and unmotivated in calmness. The problem is you, recognize it and stop trying to rationalize this break up.
The audiacy of people always amazes me😮 Who are you to tell her what she should do with her own relationship? Even if she was married she can leave any time whatever the reason becouse she is a free woman.
@@martak6959 The audacity of influencers to upload videos about the drama on their personal lives and monetize it in multiple ways with official sponsors included is equaly "amazing". Like she is not a socialité or a member of nobility to consider her love life a topic of public interest. But if you upload a video about your life in a free way trough a free platform, everyone is equaly free of write an opinion for free. And actually this is what she wants, the Lizard Liz knows that comments, positive or negative, equals more money for her, more traffick, more attention, etc. She is doing this because drama is literally her bussiness and this life update is for attention, validation, traffick, engagement and of course money. She is not that innocent and you don't be naive....
@@martak6959 it’s okay to leave, but it’s not okay to normalize compulsions. In the era of tinder everyone became disposable, and it will turn against everyone one way or another. Heal from trauma, then preach on internet.
I was stuck in a situation that was “comfortable” but made me lose myself, now I see the only way to find hope is to have the courage to change and accept the struggles as well . Thank you Liz! Your videos changed my perspective, I changed my habits and now I do believe I can become my dream woman. Be proud of yourself❤️ you helped a lot of people
Sometimes its better to end it because like you stop working on yourself. Thank you sm. I did the same thing once before and people bashed me for it. Thanks a lot for making this video
I had experienced a few toxic relationships and leaving felt like I was born again. Till today I remember how incredibly happy I was out of the circle and because of it, my life turned 100% around for better. I would be miserable if I never left, I know that for sure.
Honestly this makes no sense Nobody will be perfect ever so when two people love each other and committed to marriage and family, they stay together and help each other get better and evolve. People got married at 18, at 20 years old and grew together and grew with their kids. If you want to have friends anyway couples usually befriend other couples and go on vacation with other couples or usually with their siblings and their significant others ‘s sibling. If you want to have single female friends you can still have them. I remember a stay at home +50s mom, she is the mother of one of my friends. She has been a housewife her whole life and she had her married friends so every morning she had her brunch with her married friends. She didn’t need to get a divorce from her husband to have her friends. Married people befriends new people, you can befriend other mum at schools etc So if grown ups can do it why can’t young people do it? I have a friend who stayed with the same boyfriend she met at 14 years old, they got married at 30 years old a couple of years ago. They have lots of friends and we go to the clubs together as a group outing, with her husband, single friends, and other couples. If you broke up simply there is no love and commitment there. My aunt got married at 17. Her husband was 20. My grandparents were against the marriage saying they were too young. Well they grew up together! And are still together. They changed a lot and they got into a lot of different stages in their life but they never divorced or broke up to get better single. If you have real love and real commitment, the fact that you are together with the other person helps you unlocking all your potential. If you are better single, this means that’s not the person for you and it’s not a real committed love.
All she said was basically that the relationship became way too codependent and it made them forget themselves and change in some negative ways she wants to undo. Once he does that as well, and they're both in a healthier space, there's a chance for them to get back together.
I don't know why people are putting words in her mouth. This is literally all she said and its mature as fuck. It's not good to be THAT codependent with your partner to the point that you cant walk anywhere by yourself anymore and need to be speaking to them almost 24/7. That's not healthy. Everyone should still maintain their individuality even in a relationship.
Props to Liz for realizing this and for taking the necessary steps to amend that. I hope both of them the best and I hope they work on whatever they need to work on to become stronger and healthier individually and maybe some day together once again.
Truth!
Thankyou, someone that actually listened and understood what I said! I have been broken up already for a month now, made new friends and finally starting to get back to myself. I’m very happy at this point and so is my ex! We still go to occasional lunches together, text daily and he saw this video and totally supports everything I said. 🙏🏻♥️♥️♥️
You know whats best for you. Period. Im so happy the both of you are coming back to yourselves during this time. Dont ever sacrifice the essence of who you are for someone else, thats not what a healthy relationship should be for anyone.
Love you xx @@Thewizardliz
You are so mature and really wise, Liz. And eventhough you are heartbroken, you know that what you did is the best for you and your ex.
love u 🤍🤍 @@Thewizardliz
Please be respectful and don’t try to say there wasn’t any love because I’m not “really” sad. I have mourned this relationship already, I cried my whole eyes out. And he is truly one of the only people I have ever loved. I still love him just not romantically. It’s very complicated for me to share something this personal however I have always been honest from the beginning and it would be a shame if I didn’t update you about a big change in my life and my healing journey. I love you all so much, I’m so grateful for each and everyone of you. Thankyou 🙏🏻♥️♥️♥️
We love you! ❤️😭
Don't worry Liz, we're here for you ❤️🩹
Ok
Stay strong
We love you ❤️
I admire you so much, really. I really look up to you, thank you for sharing this, I've grown so much during the past year, and I found your channel when you were just starting, such a big blessing. You're so strong, thank you Liz, from the bottom of my heart ❤
''Putting yourself first is not selfish, it is self-love'' It's okay guys
No, putting yourself first is selfish, self love is when you know your worth and what you deserve and respect yourself and working on yourself without putting pressure on yourself, not thinking about nothing but yourself!
@@mennaelgendy_ your definition of self love is exactly what she described in the video though, so i’m confused about what you disagree with? she realized she needed to heal more and that doing so alone would be the best for both parties involved, how is that selfish?
@@mennaelgendy_ seriously?? Why the hell am i going to out other ppl first? Yall have this mindset and when you get hurt you keep complaining
3:23 what she says here is her partner didn't really help her with her goals. In a healthy relationship, you both elevate each other. Not selfish but more of helping each other out
@@mennaelgendy_ you fucking kidding, right? if i don't put myself first, if i don't think of myself who the fuck else is going to do it? it's literally me, of course i have to put myself first.
This is exactly how I felt 4 months ago.
I ended my relationship for this same reason and I’m working on myself now, I want to be better and evolve.
How u feeling rn? I just left my boyfriend for the same reason. I got way too comfortable and stop evolving myself to become a better person. He thinks I am perfect, but I want to be my dream woman.
@@xizheng720hey, how are u? Im currently on the same situation and trying to convince myself that this is the best decision on our relationship
@@xizheng720that is a stupid reason to break up, unless it was a bad relationship. I really hope people like you stay single forever
@@songas333it's you who should be single forever
@songas333 shut up girlie literally said She wasn't feeling herself, it's not being selfish it's putting yourself first, it's self love
She literally said „it’s not you it’s me” and she was honest
You know what else is fascinating about her? That after all her personal realisations and preachments, after all her inner work on her spiritual and mental growth, she is still learning and not being afraid to show us!!! She proves it is okay to feel lost for a while, it is okay when something goes imperfect way in life. Thank you so much Liz, now I feel you are much closer to us we love you
Exactly!! Even though Liz gives us great advice and is living her dream life, she's still human after all. She's still prone to make mistakes, tackle harships, and find new meaning to her life as time goes on. Even though I already have respect for her, she has increased the amount of respect I have for her just from this video.
👏👏👏
Indeed !
@@Avi.joyyy12 It's easy when someone buys an old yt account that already has million subscriber and then decided to talk about her life while living with a rich partner. It's the same girl who talks about getting a rich guy and not a broke one in her old videos making fun of them. Now she says she is much stronger and can't co depend on your partner LOL what a clown.
ua-cam.com/video/TiDyv5zL0PI/v-deo.htmlsi=UvH0S7OXCVwYZBRH
I just got out of a 4 month toxic relationship yesterday.I am proud of myself.Thank you liz💕
Why did you even start that relationship... Maybe learn something about yourself
And I got today🙂
@@pascalramael5678 people lie and change, u can't really know someone until u spend a long time with them, just be grateful u discovered it before marriage
Same girl
@@itsdiaa3don't ever care honey
In psychology they say that when you grow up in a toxic environment when you are a child that becomes your normal .. so when you get in a good relationship you feel something wrong because you are not familiar with that.. the feeling of being happy or comfortable is not normal to you so you sabotage yourself .. I recommend you to hear to sadiapsycology she will open your eyes and help you to recognize your patterns
The way that I interpreted the video is that she was sabotaging herself by staying in the relationship. I totally agree with that you’re saying, but I don’t think it applies here
SHE NEEDS HELP HERSELF AND SHE ADVICES PEOPLE
A relationship shouldn‘t make you this comfortable that you feel stuck. It should help you evolve.
@@Anna_Helena She could've done something If she felt too comfortable? No one told her to hang out with her bf all the time.
I’m gonna watch this 100 times Liz. Every day. I got out of a relationship where I thought I was going to marry him and he left. So I’m dealing with the aftermath. It’s incredible this message. Please post more breakup stuff.
I know how that feels
Dw you aren’t alone in it
@@misabunI think they meant more like how to deal with it not necessarily about her own break up
yeah, sorry I read it so wrong. @@kaoriri17
I knewwwwww the feeling, soooo incredibly hurtttt n hard
And what in the world you are talking about? You have break heart of someone. You look a video and immediately you are brainwashed
This is such an important example of how you do not need to stay in a relationship just because it isn’t toxic or unhealthy. i love how she isn’t afraid to remove anything that doesn’t push her and support her growth
This is such a brilliant example ♡
Going to the extent of depending on a partner revolving around your life in everything you do IS unhealthy
No
This is such a wonderful example!
I feel like he was leeching off of her and maybe he doesn't have anything going on for himself so he isolated her overtime as well. Their relationship sounded really toxic. Good thing she got out safe.
Don’t let yourself feel like you are trapped in a relationship, if you want to let go of the relationship because it’s hurting you in any way leave,it’s not selfish or bad to leave,because in the end you did it for yourself ❤️.
Edit: Thank you for the likes & for knowing ur worth Queens/Kings,love u guysss xx
i feel like im about to end mine coz theres little to no communication and the guy says hes the problem and apologizes but then there is no change..its more of a cycle now....and im tired coz therres no growth.
Update: I ended it and I feel happy ✨
@@kpophyunjin He’s probably trying to play the victim, if you feel like the best option is to leave,do it you won’t regret leaving a person who isn’t putting any effort to change. If he’s just apologising but doing nothing to improve the relationship or himself don’t waste your time and ur energy on him girl
@@kpophyunjinthere’s a guy out there who is going to give you 100% and more
No communication in a relationship = No change in a relationship = No Growth in a relationship @@kpophyunjin
@@kpophyunjin I feel like liz would say to not be afraid of the change you will feel when you are not with him anymore. Be content alone and place the energy you gave him on yourself.
This hyper 'self love' and 'i need to put myself first in any situation' and 'i deserve nothing but absolute perfection' is how you end up alone and ironically lowering your self esteem because of it.
Knowing when to look past others' flaws and when to put others first is how you end up surrounded by people who reciprocate your kindness and love and support you.
Okay and that’s your opinion there’s no point commenting
@@dinacrosby5992 I'm free to comment my opinion
I dont get the contradiction in her beliefs. In some videos she talks about how femininity is all about letting things be, letting it flow, receiving, but now she talks about how shes too comfortable, too dependent on her partner, didnt have her hustle and motivation to make deals because of him. That's not really adding up to what she professes about feminine energy. Shes choosing her career and masculine traits over a partner whos literally providing for her and providing the space for her to be in her feminine. I think there's a lot of confusion in what she wants or thinks she wants, and hey everyone goes through it. I hope the best for her but just pointing out the contradictions that some people might not be observing.
exactly, i dont understand it.
Being too comfortable vs being too dependent is a huge difference
It’s because every human needs a balance between masculinity & femininity. If you’re only focused on one, it’s not a good balance at all.
@@user-hqwkhrc4kf-fb brother, I think you’re getting confused, masculinity & femininity has nothing to do with your sexuality nor gender, especially when it comes to your heart
💀 I’ll explain the best way I can:
every single human, whether you’re gay, bisexual or straight, should have a balance of both masculinity and femininity in their heart. Without this balance; you’d fall into toxic masculinity/toxic femininity as you’re relying on one yin or Yang instead of BOTH yin and Yang. To grow as a better person, the soul and mindset should have a balance.
It’s like this: pretend there is a scenario where a man may rely on his wife to take care of his children and do all the dishes, bath the children, wash their clothes, clean the house. This, you might call a feminine trait. However, you can’t take your wife for granted. If she dies, this duty of cleaning, bathing your children, feeding you children, will fall onto YOU. This is why every human should have a mix between masculinity and femininity. You don’t know what situation God will throw at you, & if you don’t have the skill developed for a situation, then you’re going to be pretty fcked in a situation like this. Hell, cooking is a basic skill. Forget about children, everyone should know how to cook for themselves whether you’re a man or a woman. Don’t underlook cooking as a man just because it’s feminine. And don’t underlook self defence as a woman just because it’s masculine. Both are essential for every human individual.
!!!!
Nah, honestly I got hurt by this video because it was my ex’s reason to break up with me.
The truth is, people are not ready for healthy and comfortable relationship because they have their trauma and they are used to emotional abuse, so when the relationship is healthy they are getting bored. That’s it. I will never understand how one can give up on a person he/she loves. If you feel like you’re lost and have inner problems it doesn’t always mean there is something wrong with your relationship. It’s just a personal crisis that you can’t solve, and it’s always easier to break up as you think the true reason is there. It’s not always like that.
Life is too short to give up on soulmates just because you are lost and go through stuff. I hate it that there is so much egoism and nobody cares about other people’s feelings. Relationship is not about one person, it’s always the work of two, and if you’re not ready to find compromise and solve problems why would you even enter a relationship?
This all wasn’t about Liz particularly, it’s about people in general.
I agree with this! People don't like comfortable and peaceful relationships. Sometimes there's actually nothing to fix.
Yeah I got similar thoughts.. like it's only 4 months
If he is your best friend and you love him why not talk about it and work on it together? Break up is just a brutal easy solution to me
100% agree with your comment
IKR.
This is so incredibly well said. I agree 200%. And the other responses to your comment are just as important. It's been a while since I've seen someone make an intelligent comment and have others agree with it. At least some of us have our head on straight and can recognize these things.
I just feel Liz is avoidant attachment style, being afraid to be merged in a relationship but not knowing how to keep oneself while being inter-dependent. This is not just a maturity thing, also it has nothing to do with love(because they love each other), it is attachment trauma.
I agree. Theres flaws in everything. No one is fully healed. If codependency is an issue talk it out or go to couples therapy for it.
@@yourealfr exactly! Like there’s worse issues that come up in relationships. When you live with a significant other it’s easy to become codependent, you set boundaries and make it work you just don’t break up unless you never wanted the relationship. I wonder if there’s more to it than she’s letting on.
Agree. Sometimes we have to put self development books down and go and live and take the lessons along the way. You can feel in the video theirs a disconnect. I wonder if it’s an ego death? A spiritual awakening happening? Like the self dev and growth (which is positive) keeps her close to the version that got her to this abundant state of self esteem and the relationship bringing unveiling her to her true nature. Relationships do that to ya. Fascinating to see. Well, wish her well.
To be fair, you're really not saying anything new. That's basically what she says in the video and recognizes that that's her challenge, and that's why she left a relationship is to work on this and herself. Which is the only way you can really work on that
Well I mean... yes and no. Yes. But also - no. Some of the language you use in my opinion is inherently negative to be honest - "to be merged", "being inter-dependent". I think it's perfectly possible to have healthy, thriving, long term relationships without being 'merged' or 'inter-dependent'. There are as many couples who successfully spend their lives together while living apart (and being financially independent, and maintaining independent social lives) as there are couples who truly successfully stay happy their whole life fully merged. There's really no reason to presume merging and inter-dependence are necessary; that's a value that you hold as a 'valid' attachment - but does it have to be?
Abuse victims without proper help always seek chaos
frr finally someone said it
ONGGGGGGG
Ending a relationship meant a whole another chapter. We wish you all the best.
So… I’m the only one who totally understand Liz and think she took the best decision ?
FR I completely agree she’s so strong for that and I love that she makes decisions for herself
@@whoisgalla shes a sil ly hopeless woman but shes worse because shes giving out unhi nged advice to others. Her channel needs to be taken down at once
Nah, this is a perfect representation of the post modern self absorbed dystopian society we live in. People don't have commitment, gratitude or patience anymore. You can be yourself, and still be madly in love. And when you're no longer madly in love, you can still cultivate the spirit of devotion and dedication towards the partner who does the same for you, and it will blossom into love at its own pace again. You wanna change something? Communicate and let your partner know. Work on it together. This man literally paid for her therapy and gave her everything. She didn't like his introverted lifestyle, she should've maintained her own while still being with him. She says he didn't stop her from anything, so why is she out here playing the victim and shaming the poor man. She got bored, she left. This is sick. Don't end things just because it's easy. Just because you can. No wonder divorce rates are the highest they've ever been in history.
@bellaxnyc you're absolutely right, she has a modern women mindset like Kevin Samuels said. Her boyfriend is a provider, a faithful men help her to get better and, she has the audacity to ended the relationship because she is bored. She only want to see her option in the street. Once she will go on the street and find the amont of cheater and narcissistic men, and she will be lost by the hookup culture, she will want to come back to her ex. I hope he will find a wife who will appreciate him for who he is. That type of men is gold in our generation.
@@SosoWedge where did she said she was bored? she said she was gettino too attached to her bf, which is unhealthy
Literally why me and my ex broke up. We both said that we had lost who we are in the relationship, and we need to find our individual selves first before we can be happy again. This really helped me process what's going on, because I too lost my spark for life and it's a tough spot to be in but everything will get better because it always does!
Hi can you pls explain to us why did you lose your spark ? Thx
going through this feeling right now in a relationship... and i know my bf has codependency issues,.. and i think i do too. i have felt so unhappy with myself and my life lately. i feel like i can't fully pour the focus and love back into myself FOR me to make myself happy first. it's seemed so hard to stick to any habits or goals i've been trying to start and commit too. it feels like too much. i miss being single and having my full energy to direct towards bettering myself, being happy with myself, and working towards my goals again without havibg to worry about someone else and their feelings. i know i shouldn't feel selfish feeling this way but part of me does, and i think that is the people-pleaser and abandonment trauma in me coming out. just having such a difficult time coming to this realization with full honesty and making the decision i know that needs to happen.... cuz i know it will hurt regardless. :/
@@earth2jade why you don't get w therapy, maybe will help you. I have seen a korean serial. I know is movie but a women have lost herself in relationship that she has cause she have a trauma from another break up and she broke with the this guy cause she wanted to find herself. But they could not stay away from each other. In the end this guy tell this women LET FIND OURSELF BIT TOGETHER. SO BOTH HAVE FOUND EACH OTHER ESPECIALLY THE GIRL WITHOUT BREAKING UP FOREVER. BOTH GIVE SPACE EACH OTHER
@@leylalo4927 which kdrama are you talking about??
My ex broke up with me today for this exact reason
It's crazy how people's goal is to have a healthy relationship but once they have it they get bored of it ! Human is never satisfied
It’s not that she got bored of it, It’s because it took over Her personal life and Her Soul
@@ItxMxra because he was perfect not cheating on her ,he also made her a priority
so you literally didn't watch the video 💀
It's crazy how you judge her without watching the video!
She got used to drama and shit, very immature
You’re a great example for all women. Never prioritize a man, they wouldn’t do it for you, women are socialized into believing it’s normal and expected for them to give up themselves for men, but you have the power to say no, I come first.
“He wouldn’t do it for you” facts. Even if they love you. Men put themselves first, always. Women should do the same for our own sake
Hey this is a heads up that thinking that way is harmful!! Like idk what conditioned you to think in the same way as others think that “all men are bad” but that way it won’t really manifest
She’s not saying men are bad. She said don’t prioritize them. Idk what conditioned you to think their the same thing.
EXACTLY , the last words tho 😻✨
@@Aaa-dv3oigirl shut up
people don’t realize that relationships can really drain you. it’s amazing to have that connection with somebody who is truly on your vibration, but vibration is always shifting, and sometimes, our time with the person is only meant to last a little while until we get to our next chapter. people view relationships in a really co dependent way and they assume it’s supposed to last forever but it doesn’t, NOTHING lasts forever.
thanks for sharing your journey and perspective Liz, it’s really eye opening.
Precisely because "vibration" is always shifting, precisely because of that, love is not about "vibration" at all...
@@ximenadelriovery true. And I keep wondering what's going to happen when she gets married. Like when she doesn't feel the vibrations, will she get a divorce
@@ximenadelrioyou’ll know it’s true love when your vibrations no longer shift and are permanently equal. Twin flames.
What if you're married? And some people even have kids
I'm already getting a headache@@georgemubanga1878
The trick is do be able to do the things you want to do while in a relationship. Seperation might help bring you back into balance but it's a whole different thing maintaining that with a person. It's all about: No matter what the conditions I can mainatin my habits and my peace and joy. I don't have to control conditions because it's always me and me. You don't have to be seperate to have fire . The art is being in a relationship while being two individuals with passions yet making space for both to exist simultaneously without codependency.
True otherwise we run evertime we loose connection with ourselves. It has to be faced and we have to learn to find that balannot easy
It sounds so complicated
@@Sagespirit111it is 😅 I think I lost myself in some way in all my relationships. Honestly have no idea how to stop this endless loop. But mostly I feel like this is my own problem and not depends on my partner
@Julie_Lovely you should look into attachment theory. You might be a fearful avoidant. I do this every time as well mostly because I had to protect myself emotionally as a child it translated to my adulthood. I'm now trying to retrain my brain but it's not easy. It takes a lot of work and meditation. Sometimes also, we can heal up or heal down from someone that we are with and I think in those cases it's okay to leave. The last thing you want is to share your precious energies with someone that doesn't give energies back
I love this so much. Thank you. I'm single for 5 years now and this video still helps me to be MORE ready when I finally want to be in a relationship again. In the meantime, there's a lot of stuff to work with only myself and that's good. Loveee
The real relationship is where you support each others’ goals while working on yours. The real relationship is where you want to succeed together. The real relationship is where you work hard on your goals while you also pray for your partner’s success.
Preach❤
True.
10000% true. FACTS.
💯
Man she just wasn’t comfortable with the relationship cause she was getting too attached and was losing connection with herself, stop misunderstanding it
This woman has literally changed my life. thank you for sharing your thoughts and experience. Thank you, Liz, for everything!!!
Can we all agree that she is so real for this. Becuse like she could just come here and talk about self love and be in a relationship that made her care about herself less, but she realized the problem, ended it and said what needs to be said. Love you Liz, I hope you'll get your happiness back on top. ❤❤
I relate to this so much
my best friend and i decided to give our friendship some time in order to heal ourselves. We were becoming extremely attached to each other and it was getting into a real toxic point, so as Liz says we have prioritized ourselves instead of losing us to the friendship
To anyone watching this keep pushing through! You will persevere. ❤
you are the reason i saved myself and adapted the mindset i needed
@@TirppieRed ❤
@@ThewizradIiz😊😊
@@ThewizradIiz😊
@@mrguaco sure i willl
This helped me so much. It's so hard to break it off when you still love them
i love you for this video. this is exactly what i’m going through right now and i felt like i was crazy bc of it thank you so much.
you’re so strong liz we’re all so proud of you
She is brave ✨💕
@ThewizradIiz girl ur name is "Thewizradliz" not "Thewizardliz" ur fake and u ain't fooling anyone lmao
@@a.baybeeego cry about it then
nobody asked u bro
@@Perditorian @krybaybee is actually a cry baby lmao
Moral of the video is that it's *very* important to have a life and ambition outside your relationship. While I do think it's an issue one could communicate before breaking up, I'm sure you tried or that there's more to it that we as viewers simply don't know and that's fine.
I have a friend that ended a 6 year relationship for the same reason and it's not been an easy path for them but it may have been the right one.
This is sooo so true! Everyone does come into your life for a reason. My ex was my lesson, he made me realise that I don't value myself enough and that I don't put myself first. He made me realise that I'm an anxious person with relationships in my life and that I'm such a people pleaser. I hate when people say "all that just become strangers again" yes the end result might be the same as it started as in being strangers, but you yourself are not the same as before you met that person in your life. They taught you a lesson, that will then allow you to grow and work on yourself. No one will ever be satisfied with anything nor themselves, so you'll always find something you want to improve and that is okay, life is a roller coaster and it goes on and on, that person who is your ex as much as they may have mistreated you or maybe they were a good person it doesn't matter, they tought you something, even if you may not realise it yet, and they just wasn't for you, God has pushed them out of the way for something better for you, not worse!
working on those things while still being in a relationship is the only way to truly solve the issue at hand. working on urself while single won’t fix a problem that u have when ur in a relationship. ur not working on the problem while being single ur getting back to the things u used to do. when u get in a relationship again it will be the same thing over again bc the relationship was never the problem.
this POV 😳
WOW wonderful statement
I share your opinion. In a relationship, we both have to put in the effort. If there's a problem, you need to discuss it, talk about it, and try to find a solution together as a couple. However, we do what we believe is best for us at the time. Realisation sometimes comes much later in life.
I felt the same as you for a year. nobody understood me, they criticized me and convinced me to stay with my ex. I took pills to calm myself down, to get rid of anxiety. I also went to therapy trying to change my pattern of attractiveness. In the end we broke up. Sometimes it's good to do what you feel.
omg yes why are we encouraged to stay until it gets bad????
literally same! everyone was convincing me to stay and i knew deep down that the best decision was to leave but i didn’t have the courage to do so. 1 month later i left without overthinking it. was sad the first days, then nothing. i felt liberated
Therapy for changing attractiveness?
I didn't get it can anyone explain
I’m so proud of you💕
I think she maybe meant discuss with her therapist to change some old habits and create new ones that would make her more attractive
Please remember that people are not replaceable, having someone who truly loves you is super rare and nobody can be that person.
Yes!!
!!
There is probably more to the story than what she’s sharing, most relationships that get too comfortable like this is probably cause the sex life has become boring or non existent
@@liaa4172exactly. you can’t get too comfortable in relationship because if you do, you stop trying and doing certain things that make relationship flourish and lovely. hard to stay happy in relationship when you don’t feel loved :((
I agree, i think she have not yet completely healed from her past trauma yet
He sounds like a good guy. I hope he finds someone that appreciates him.
I really hope he finds someone else and never go back to this subtly toxic lizard. I feel bad for him being fooled by this "self growth" noble sounding bs reason for break up. When basically the relationship was healthy & stable. Well, maybe not so healthy because she is unhealthy person to be in relationship with.
@@intuitivevibes1818not everything is meant to last. You’re taking this way more seriously than Liz is. Just because something is perfect doesn’t mean it has to stay or last. Life goes on. There is no need to call her out her name.
@@shaysimson6951 You have no idea what kind of bs you are defending here. Go watch her video from past where she also did broke up with previous guy where everything was okay. She is only novelty seeker. She is blaming her current boyfriend for her getting lazy (and not spending that much time doing her hobbies). When actually nothing was directly stopping her to do so. Are you seriously defending this? Think twice next time before commenting.
@@intuitivevibes1818 where in the video is she blaming and saying it’s her ex’s fault? No where. I don’t know what you are so upset about. Are you the guy she dumped? If she wants to leave something good she can. Why do her choices affect your life?
she didn't say he's horrible person idk what y'all r on about
I’m in the exact same situation since a week now and omg, that feels so weird but reassuring to hear that I’m not alone, to hear the words that describe exactly the thoughts that I got for 7 days now. And I think that it has helped me a lot, so thank you so much Liz.
this is exactly me and my partner. she did the thing (breaking up) that i didn't have the courage to do. now i'm working on myself and it's so much better.
Ended my relationship a couple months ago. I had a similar dynamic to you where we were each other's everything. I'm also looking forward to getting myself back, working towards my goals, and learning more about what I like and want. I used to be very outgoing and developed social anxiety from my relationship. Gonna be single for a while. I missed being single. To all the newly single girls out there, we got this!!! Time to level up. :)
I did the mistake, and I didn’t take break from relationship when my intuition told me, it took very bad place, and we both did huge mistakes, and now we have this pain, however we ended the relationship now, and have same same love and bond,,, but sometimes we just need to do what our intuition tells us)❤️
It's rather common for us ladies to forget our own needs, interests and make that person and that relationship the main priority. It's almost like an escape from yourself and then we end up resenting this man and the person we've become when with him.
tf that is not bad@@IEVAKambarovaite
Liz, I'm sorry but I'm not sure about this one. I understand what you say, sometimes being in a really long term relationship can be suffocating, but make sure you're not losing something really important just because you need a little space. I understand you're being very successful right now, you have a big audience and many people love you and support you, but trust me, real love from a partner is never to be taken for granted. I'm speaking from experience.. I've been in a long term relationship with someone who loved me a lot. We had a very strong bond but I eventually felt like I needed to get some space because I wasn't living my life fully like I wanted to (and I was also trying to find myself). When we broke up, I felt relieved and I was sure I could find love very easily after a couple of months. Just like you, I am a very attractive girl and I never had trouble attracting men. But now, 2 years after being single, I realized that even if i have many options, true love isn't to be found everywhere. A lot of men come to me, but they don't get truly interested in who I am and my personality. They're more fascinated by the image of who I am, my energy, my smile. Finding someone who's actually willing to listen to you, cares about you, wants to help you, and wants to be there for you is rare and very precious. Don't think that you will find better than him just because you may feel powerful at the moment. Those things are a blessing. Real and deep connections are a blessing.
Also, you talk a lot about the importance of having a good relationship with yourself. Sure that is important, but know that you will never be fully self sufficient no matter how independant you are. Humans are not meant to be emotionally self sufficient. Whether you like it or not, we are codependent creatures. Trying to practise full self detachment at all cost will end up breaking you.
Anyways, I hope this single phase will lead you to where you want to be. You will probably enjoy your single life at the beginning, but eventually life is going to feel pretty lonely after a while and you will miss what you had. Sometimes men love us so much, they become too nice and too generous with us. Passion disappears and we take them for granted. This space time will give good lessons to both you.
I am absolutely agree with your point. I have the same situation. It passed 2,5 years after my last long relationship and l can’t find person who would appreciate me but l also thought that it will be so easy, not at all. I was saying myself okay this is time to understand who l am, what l am looking in this life. And now l understand that l was able to do it being in the relationship. It would be harder but it’s real. Any Relationships need that both people work in it.
It may be the fact that she got bored in the relationship who knows
The number when I liked it was 111. This is definitely a message for me. People can grow individually in a relationship! Thank you
i absolutely agree with this pov. thank you for sharing this beautiful thought
👏🏻 👏🏻 yes!!!
this is exactly what i needed to hear right now. i feel the same way as you Liz, thank you for opening my eyes AGAIN. i feel you.
Liz you are so brave. Discovering your channel is one of the best thing that ever happened to me. Love you lots😘
Last year I broke up with my boyfriend for about the same reason. He may was a very good guy but I had lost myself, we wanted different things, we didn't do anything together, he only liked to have fun with friends, I had lost my femininity. Almost a year later, not only was I relieved but I discovered my true self! Grateful for that!❤😊
do you still love each other ?
Bro something very similar happened to me as well it's been 2 months I broke up with my bf of 4 years and I feel so light happy feminine and relaxed....
Same sister I hope you heal soon
Nah, don't lie, all this is hogwash for the fact you wanted more money and he wasn't paying out.
@@prussiansocietyofamericaAS if you know her. We both don't know her life. So why should we judge
love how we all clicked on her newest video within the minute of her uploading 💕💖
yess
M hm
Do you ever feel she just turns on UA-cam and says whatever she wants to say to herself like recording your own pep talk for yourself it could be good for yourself but everything a person says in a self pep talk not everything is right to share with everybody people might get wrongly guided without understanding the context in which that particular thing was said .
This thought just came on my mind I wanted it to let out so I did it here that's all :)
Talking to older generations and personal experiences made me realise that you should always put yourself first
people will say it’s narcissistic but as long as you are not hurting people nor yourself , it’s okay
if someone or something is not serving you your highest purpose , you should let them go : you may feel guiltier about being with them whilst knowing you do not truly want them
if you are letting go of yourself or not focusing on yourself BECAUSE of your relationship , you have all rights to break up
"as long as you're not hurting people nor yourself, it's okay"
What about the guy whose heart just got broken? Why even pretend to give a damn about a person if you'll just abandon them when things aren't totally perfect? Working things out before you bail is what a good person does. Unless the other person is a psycho, then they're human too and should be treated like a human being.
This "self help" content is such narcissistic garbage.
nah wtf
@@validskepticismI think Liz may have communicated with him beforehand about why they needed to seperate. Obviously if she blindsided him, then it's wrong because he has feelings as well. We should always love ourselves and do what's best for us, but we also need to understand that our decisions can also impact the people around us as well. As humans, thinking only of ourselves is inherently narcissistic. Liz was thinking of both her and her partners life, and how to better themseleves and she concluded that they'd both do better separated.
@@validskepticismSTOP PROJECTING .
@pa-dn1vh u act like being single and having no kids is a bad thing 😂😂 statisticlly women who arent married and have no kids tend to have a better, more fulfilling and successful life. stop projecting ur fears onto women, you men arent that important!😊
"I miss myself" beautiful ❤
Ya'll you don't have to leave your parter to learn being whole again and focus on yourself!!!! Took me ages to get that but it's true. Do you think 30,40 years of marriage last when people break up after each periodically in life popping up identity crisis?! Relationship is work, it's a battle, realising that it would be way more easy to leave but staying cause you made a decision. I'm not saying what she's doing is wrong or weak. It's a choice. But that choice can become a pattern and then you end up switching partners or breaking love each time you disconnect to yourself. This can't be the solution unless you deep down prefer to live a rather uncommitted life.
Well, it's good she's realising this now (unmaried) rather than later (married)
I say her man is happy now. I'm a girl but if I was a guy dating her, I'd be suffocated from paying ALL her bills. It doesn't feel good knowing that the only reason she's with me is for MONEY.@@cleansing132
You just defined posmodern society. Everything is disposable, everyone is disposable... that is the mindset of this world. Sad.
Yes exactly how it is…it is a negative pattern
While I agreed with her, I do agree with you too. She could stay with her partner, go to couples therapy, go to single therapy, work on herself and her partner and that can be so much harder than being single tbh. Relationships are too much work. But if nothing else was wrong in her relationship, she could give therapy a shot. They could try communicating and work on themselves while being together. They could also take some space, hibernate and stuff
i love this. it feels so good to hear someone else talking about how a relationship doesn’t have to be awful in order for it to not be for you!
Agree! Toxic relationship is not only the reason why two people break up. Some might think it is weird for someone to feel distant because of being too comfortable in the relationship, but it really does happen.
Gurl I relate each and every word. Thank you so much. I ended my relationship now I feel way better love you 💗
Liz thanks for being so upfront. You are also extremely young and there is NOTHING WRONG WITH NOT WANTING TO SETTLE! You are bettering yourself, you’re being a better you and that’s all that matters. As long as you are okay, that is all that matters.
Liz honey, although you mention that there was nothing wrong in your relationship, your words say otherwise. A relationship does not have to be toxic for you to leave. If your partner was clingy and couldn't function without you, that's an indication of a problem. If you felt like you were losing yourself and lost motivation, that's also an indication of a problem. Sounds like you both need to work on yourselves and be single for a little bit. If you're meant for each other, you'll definitely get back together.
Nothing new... Narcissistic self-obssesed people usually attract needy antisocial people as partners. Both types of people are very similar, they both live for validation and at the end of the day they are looking for a dad or a mom. If you are a grown adult you already know this, if you are really young or even a teenager, believe me, you will undertand this at some point of your life.
@@ximenadelrio Are you diagnosing Liz with narcissism?
@@ximenadelrioI understand what you mean. I also understand what Liz means, but I also agree with your opinion. I like Liz, I even love her. Independence is needed even in relationships. Her reasons are reasonable, even to the point of breaking up, but here I feel there is something I can't explain, I smell narcissism.
@@ximenadelrioas a person with aspd you're so damn correct man
@@ximenadelriodawg what
Part of being in a good relationship is building each other up and encouraging one another to accomplish their goals, encouraging one another to become better overall in all areas where they could improve
Thank you a lot for this video! ❤❤❤
It really helps back to ourselves and choose evolving, instead of fear or comfort.
I really needed this video to get assured that ending a relationship for your own good is valid! Last year I ended a relationship for the same reason. I was just not working hard anymore. And after I broke up, the hate on me was insane! I did it for myself and I do not feel sorry. You go Liz!
*selfish
I feel you sooo much. The amount of hate I got after I broke up was insane
I feel that. I dated a guy from Colombia. I was sending him money. I lost myself. I was doing way too much for him and I couldn't even pay my rent at one point because I was constantly sending him money. He didn't want to grow or take care of himself. We broke up and it hurt me but it was necesary. I couldn't love myself or help myself.
@@aishasehba350same here sissies, the hate I went thru is insane
@@Sonicxis4everYou began to match his energy. I could not be more proud of you. He wouldn’t dare end the relationship because it benefits him. You made the right call and it truly is a shame that he wouldn’t step up for you like you would for him. Better for you to cut your losses before it stacks up even more so.
I’ve been in a similar situation. I wish I could have seen them for who they were rather than the image of what they wanted me to see. When I ended things, they didn’t care to
Liz, coming from someone who has been single for 22 years a.k.a. my whole life this gives me so much comfort to hear. I haven’t found anyone that matches my energy yet and brings out the full potential in me so I decline all girlfriend invitations as they do not serve me. However, how are you not so afraid of letting someone go that at one point served you so well? Don’t you get scared you won’t find that feeling again?
Why would you "decline all girlfriend invitations?" How do none of them serve you? I'm curious
I was single until I was 25 for the same reason, I could only imagine myself with someone that matched my energy, otherwise I’d rather stay single. At the same time I got into my first (and only) relationship I started my growth journey and realized my partner and the relationship itlself was pushing me back. It was a short relationship, in a matter of months we were not in sync anymore and I decided to leave. I’m very happy for my decision and single again. ❤ I know I will be with someone in the same energy level, at the moment let’s enjoy our singleness ✨
confidence that you will find that feeling again. manifestation. the universe has a plan always, you’ll know if someone is right or not.
@@AyaNichelle-gi9cd I personally felt the same way as Ashley! I noticed when I head out with a certain group or spend time with a certain girlfriend, I feel so drained at the end of each session. The girls also do not have the same goal in life as I do. It would be a waste of our time and energy to be spending time with people who do not "serve us". Hope this helps :)
I'm single for five years now. But society pressure me to have children .
“There was nothing wrong in the relationship so I left”
no? she said that she was getting very codependent and she didnt want that. people arent supposed to want to talk with their partners 24/7, you need to still have some individuality. also its her decision, so who are you to judge..
have you watched the video before leaving this inconsiderate comment? She literally said she was being too comfortable in the relationship and it made her unable to be independent anymore. Plus she wasn't self-motivated anymore which is not a good thing.
@meatloaf690 Girl bfrrr and is breakup a solution!!! What she needed was a balance and have more time for herself!. Yes it's her choice buy since she posted it as an advice she shouldn't expect no criticism.
I'm surprised that you all defend her advice blindly !
Once you mature you will realise that relationships have downs and falls, if you have her mindset, you will never have a healthy relationship
@@blablible7156 same with u 🤦🏻♀️
You put together some stuff that she said passing her explanation like a little dumbass.
I’m not speaking about Liz, but felt it important to comment here as a recovered intimacy avoider: just make sure you aren’t in a pattern of leaving relationships anytime they get peaceful because it’s ‘boring’. I used to do this, and I was miserable. There are absolutely times when you’re truly not attracted to a person in a larger sense, and it’s not necessarily a toxic situation, but just remember that comfort is a normal part of a long term relationship. You won’t find longterm passion or motivation in a new relationship if you have underlying issues. As Liz said, you have to work to get that passion, especially after the honeymoon phase. It’s totally possible, but not if you always leave. So again, I’m not speaking to Liz, I’m speaking to the people who might need to ask some hard questions. ❤
My Mom used to tell me it can be harder at times to leave something that is not forcing you to leave but that you genuinely feel in your heart is not right for you. And now in my life it makes (sixth) sense.
It's choosing what is best for you. And only you know what that is.
No one needs to understand your journey but you.💗
therapy is expensive but Liz's advice are priceless❤
So happy to find an army here @eshaestheticc💜
@@ThewizradIiz fake liz is crazy😭😭
this advice is garbage and will ensure you will never be happy.
@@AdoptedPoodon't bother trying to convince these people, this is a fully enveloped echo chamber
Im so proud of you Liz! Not everyone understands what its like to put themselves first! Its never too late. Thank you for being so transparent with your words ❤
Instead of talking through it, like a mature couple, she ends the whole relationship.
People need to start learning how to KEEP a relationship by KEEPING on fixing it not just having one.
Cry about it cuz it's her life. ❤
@@WonyoungcuteYou are so cringe. People are allowed to oppose someone’s opinions and life choices lmfao.
@@ieattrees8551 you're the cringe one here lmao. Leaving 3 hate comments since you have no life and no other things to do 🫢
@@ieattrees8551y’all don’t even know her. So how tf y’all gon disagree with something that has nothing to do with you. Weirdo
i see everyone saying 'communication is key' like an npc but yall dont get it when u try to communicate the issue with some people they either deny, don't understand or manipulate u. it RARELY works. u can put ur heart into a whole pharagraph and the person ur dealing with can reply to the most unimportant part. some people dont have the perfect skills and communication isn't always the best option
Everybody talk about finding yourself and puting yourself in first place, because they aren't receive something in relationship. But nobody talk about giving your time and energy into something. In life sometimas our dear persons have hard time and they need us. You don't leave person you love during hard time. Relationships aren't easy or always beautiful. You have hard time and you have good time.
I was in a relationship for 6 years and I think I completely lost myself. It's hard for me to wake up without him, to do something without his support, it's so terrible. I really want to find myself again, love and enjoy. Thank you Liz, your videos give me great support!
I feel you. We became so dependent. We got this.
Yes and also I’m like homeless then…
Liz the same thing I am going through rn. Thank you so much for uploading it. I needed it. Love you honey 🎀
so glad that she mentioned that sometimes its godd to listen to ur own intuition. I know I need to detach from people so this video came at the right time💕
Staying too long can cause resentment and I’m glad you stepped out when you did. Proud of you girl!!
So very true.
@@Chi-np2lzThis is why marriages don't last nowadays.
@@Chi-np2lzp
@@bellabrieeee😂
But why does it cause resentment? Same thing happened to me in my relationship experience
There is another quote “you can only know someone as deep as you know yourself” and this is so true.
Thank you so much, I'm from France and I just find your youtube channel.
This video resume exactly my situation with my partner, I'm still with him and I have a lot of questions in my mind, I think I m scared to end my relationship but your video is perfect and it helps me, thank you again.
not related to the topic, but i love how the cat kept passing thru the camera 🥺
Sharing something this personal by yourself is in this society something really brave, yet scary. My honest view on this whole situation is for everyone to really “listen to your own intuition” (as in the video stated). Because people go through so many weird, hurtful things that there is a million ways of adapting and moving on. You just gotta align with yourself, with your soul and find your own solution.
basically the relationship became a comfort zone so she left
this was so helpful. i’ve been in a 7 month relationship and we just ended it and continued as a freindrelationship because i have such a good connection with him, before i dated him i was working out, doing face workouts, eating healthy and feeling skinny and positive. after i started dating him it’s like he was all i though about and i never wanted that to happen but it happened anyway. i stopped doing my workouts, face workouts, i know i’m not at my highest and i’ve known for months but i kept thinking it’ll get better and it never did. as much as he tried giving me compliments and trying to motivate me i didn’t feel like myself, just from watching this video i think i have the courage to end it. i miss being single and dating myself and loving myself. i was at my best.
Love it Liz..I totally agree and have in those situations too..now I am slowly redeeming part of myself that were lost years ago
...❤
The saddest thing about this video is the amount of comments that are like "This is what I needed. I'm gonna break up with my partner of Xamount of years. Wish me luck". If you need an excuse to break up your relationship, sure take her words for it. Maybe it was the right decision for her (even though I disagree but that's just me), doesn't mean it's for you. Use your own head before making big decisions! I get the whole "I need to focus on myself and my goals ect". Guess what? You can do that WHILE IN A RELATIONSHIP. If you feel like you can't do that, it's a YOU problem, not a RELATIONSHIP problem. And maybe that's why you need to find an excuse or a reason to break up, maybe something else is missing that you don't realise or want to face. Personally I think a relationship should be a healthy and safe environment where you can be yourselves and grow together. AKA, being comfortable with each other. That means you go through the ups and lows together. Even when you feel like you're letting yourself go, or the other person does. A relationship should be a safe place for you to rest when you need to and pick yourself up again when you're able to. Partners support each other, love each other. If you feel like something is missing, COMMUNICATE! If you feel like you're not trying hard enough, TALK ABOUT IT. Support each other. Love isn't just the honeymoon phase and when everything and everyone is perfect. Things fade, things evolve. Things change, doesn't mean it's for the worse. I just really miss the time when people cared enough about their relationships and strived for the better TOGETHER, until they became an old couple. Happy together. Seems so rare these days... That's my take on it. Thanks if you read so far. That's her decision and her journey. All I want to say is, don't use this video as the reason you were searching for because you can't face yourself. Please think first. Feel first. A long term relationship doesn't equal a boring one. Take care.
You just realized the dynamic in social media. Most influencers are not geniuses, not artists, not inventors, not heroes, nor martires, nor prophets, not saints, they are influencers... they are not famous because they are special or because they have work to develop hard skills, but because they are average, they are a perfect reflection of the society they live in, because they are mirrors and they validate the audience's thoughts and feelings. Majority of the population no longer want to see extraordinary people putting the bar high, not anymore, they want ordinary people who make them feel less disappointed in their own lives and who are not so different from them, who give them the illusion that we can all do everything. And that is not true. Anyone can be remarkable, anyone... not everyone. Of course there is nothing wrong about being average at all, it's ok. So everyone today want to believe that their inmaturity and lack of character is "ok", so this types of influencers are here to validate that desire. Youngest generations only know to say "OMG, you are just like me."
You described it all so well. I wish more people realize that you can improve when you are in relationship. You do not need to throw away everything to "become the best version of yourself". Not everything in life will be always perfect just as our relationships. Why not to try growing togehter. Nowadays we give up to early and real conection between two loving people is not that easy to find.
I was about to say, a lot of people here don’t realize they’re the problem. They rather just claim every issue pointed out about them is a projection. They also refuse to think for themselves otherwise.
I completely agree. I feel also like ppl are expecting always the best from relationships, but forget that there are also lows (getting too comfotable). Why not talking to your partner about this. Honestly ppl are so blended about this "healthy and happy"social media relationship bullshit.
I was like wait WTF - she’s gonna regret this
On a psychological perspective, this video doesn't surprise me at all because I always found it amusing how she had such a toxic childhood but still managed to be in a consensual relationship for a long time..
The father figure (the only man a child will look upto) was basically abusive and destructive in Liz's life, this causes the child to grow an dislike towards men subconsciously and it's totally understandable, I'm glad she's taking her time to heal and feel better.
But I still hold her responsible for entering into a relationship while she was clearly not mentally prepared to be in one, and that's why I strongly disagree with the people in the comment section saying "I'm so proud of you Liz" because there's nothing to be proud of.
Imagine being proud of a man for leaving his loyal girlfriend because he wanted to be single, not something to be proud of, right? It's the same thing over here.
Exactly! So right
Well said!
Imagine being proud of a man for leaving his loyal girlfriend - happens all the time though
Men cheat on the loyal girlfriend all the time and other men celebrate them for it. The ACTUAL difference here is that men only leave when replacement is in place while women sometimes leave to be single.
I resonate with this so much. I just kept thinking through this video I can’t agree because I do want my next safe and healthy relationship to be my forever home. As long as it stays that way I think it’s important to be committed. But I’m no guru so my perspective could be warped too.
This is an interesting perspective she’s providing and I always appreciate her transparency.
@@huntsman145 that might be true, but why should we commit the same mistake as men?
If men are leaving their partner, that doesn't mean that women can repeat the same thing to another man, if we continue to leave every relationship just because we got way too "comfortable", this would be a sad world to live in.
The fact that Liz was comfortable in saying that she left her boyfriend because she wanted to be single is utterly wrong. Her boyfriend probably did NOTHING wrong to deserve this
I agree that she's been through a lot of trauma and is still healing..
but If we all continue to praise this kind of behaviour, the whole idea of being in a long term relationship would become bland and distasteful, It isn't going to affect anyone but ourselves.
Liz is an high value woman with a successful career from whom we can learn alot from,there's no denying in that. But frankly, she isn't the person that we should be taking relationship advices from
I’ve been dating myself for four years now and I love it! Love your talks.
I’m happy for you and I wish us all the best in standing up for selves and what we really want mostly with our relationship with self-and others just add to it.
as someone who was in the exact same situation, she is RIGHT. me and my ex weren’t mature enough to take the decision that liz and her ex did, so, as a result of isolation and self-neglect, the relationship turned toxic and eventually we broke up in a really ugly way. so yeah, break up & work on yourselves before it’s too late.
A wizard liz female fan who was a complete POS and that's why you resonate with her? Color me suprised....
@@melekxxx9248this is exactly what happened to me, he said he didn’t love me anymore after I asked to be treated differently. Liz def helped a lot ❤
She's a person too, nobody's life is totally perfect from every angle, just because she advise us to be happy doesn't means that she herself can't have bad and unhappy days or challenging phase in her life. It's a huge thing that she's even sharing that private part of her life with us so respect her. More power to you, you're literally a wonder woman ❤️
Wow Liz I resonate so heavy with this, I’m going thru the same exact thing Thankyou for sharing this seriously 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻✨✨♥️♥️♥️
Thank you for all your videos, you inspire me so much!!!
i honestly relate to all of this. I stopped doing my own hobbies, didn't really try to find new friends, and it's as if he's the only person that I socialize with. got too comfortable that it feels like i'm no longer growing as person. it's like i put my life on hold because of him and good thing I realized it early on. (liz and other youtuber really helped me) and i started to actually make some time for journaling my thoughts, listening to youtube videos like these, affirming myself, and it wasn't easy but i'm starting to really love myself. told my bf this and he's really proud of me. anyways, just a lil rant.
and to Liz! Thanks for sharing this to us! sending you hugs!
@@Michael-ko8ufshe is not blaming him!! She’s actually blaming her inner self codependency can get really bad when you start relying on a person, u can ofcourse work on yourself and gain back your fire while still being in a relationship and that’s totally fine, they decided that working on themselves separately is better and thats also fine. You choose ur own way of evolving
Yeah Liz, same with you.
I ended our 5th years relationship, it hurts so much. But I need to save myself from a man who doesnt appreciate me and relationship anymore. Even when I got hospitalized, he didnt visit me 😢 I need to wake up, I need to take care of myself, I need to love myself, I need to be kind to myself, I need to courage myself to achieve and support anything she wants to do. thank you for this video, Liz! ❤
You're so strong 💗 sending lots of love and hope you're okay
@@Janna78797 thank you! Sending lot of ❤️
It’s not the same. Liz ended a healthy and comfortable relationship, while you had an abusive one
This isnt the cas of liz , he treated her so well
@@rowliebeachy1996 thank you for correcting me, but what I mean is we ended our relationship to choose ourself.
I wish you the best liz , and for everyone here who's trynna heal and change to ther best version , 💞
Selfish people are the standard. This isn't a positive thing to strive for but a flaw to overcome.
I don’t get why people get dramatic when someone ELSE ends THEIR relationship like it’s literally your life and your decision it doesn’t affect anyone so be proud of yourself liz. Don’t forget how many young girls you saved 💗💗💗
cause they're making it normal to leave relationships cause of "grass is greener" syndrome. Social media has fucked everything up.
I was in relationship with a really narcissistic people and since I found out this channel I started to value myself more and that got him mad
I started to love myself more and I had the courage to leave
After all that he tried to ruin my reputation just because I left
I can say that I’m a better person now
I know what I want,what I deserve and I’ll never settle for less
I’m the priority and all that is the benefit of your advice 🙏
Yes to this… it’s very easy to be co dependent on one another! She is being honest and open about why the relationship wasn’t working for her. I can totally relate I focus on my partner too much when in relationships as it revolves around them and their needs whilst avoiding what I need to work on myself. Your amazing for sharing xx
You legit just stated my problem. Thank you for being authentically you and allowing me to step into the same freedom. You feel crazy but its like EVERYTHING inside your body is telling you this person is not for your highest and it is because you're trying to step into a better version of yourself but the other person is mirroring back your old qualities you're trying to break away from.
*❤️Only God knows how much grateful i am. After so much struggles I now own a new house and my family is happy once again everything is finally falling into place!!*
$52K bi-weekly profits Despite all the financial struggles i and my family faced, everything is finally falling into place!
@@amalmberg13Wow...I know her too she is a licensed broker and a FINRA agent she is popular in
US and Canada she is really amazing woman with good skills and experience.
I remember giving her my first savings $20,000 and she opened a brokerage account for me it turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me.
@@NEILROGERS30I will leave her info below this comment.
She’s Active on What’s apps
You don’t need a “good reason” to end a relationship. Simply wanting to end it is good reason enough. I ended a relationship a few years ago simply b/c it took up so much of my time that I wasn’t striving towards other goals as much. Even when I would try, I’d get distracted by my BF and so while that was good, my relationship with myself felt neglected. It made me sad which eventually made me resent the person I was with, even though it wasn’t their fault. I was also with someone who was content complaining about their life but doing nothing about it. I didn’t want that to rub off.
People like you are just selfish and have no accountability, that's why. Eff your goals.
This is the best video ever Liz. You are like talking right out of my present soul.
liz, i just wanted to thank you for making this video. recently, i broke up with my boyfriend and i was feeling bad at myself for doing it, because i was not feeling as sad as i felt i was supposed to and i could only think about myself. i loved him and i would do anything for him, but at some point i was neglecting my own needs, what i really wanted, and thought this type of sacrifices were normal. but thanks to your video i was reassured that abdicating of the life i truly wanted to live wasn't finding a middle ground, and this would only make me unhappy. i'm feeling much better about myself now and i'm happy i decided to sound egotistical and think about myself once, you're really a nice soul and i hope you know you're helping a lot of people out there. take care, liz!
The fact that you don’t feel passionate about your goals anymore is not his fault. Healthy relationship is not about fire and passion, it’s about commitment and peace. Remembering what you’ve said before, that you grew up in constant stress at home, you simply do not feel “at home” in healthy relationships. You strive under stress and in toxic relationships, but you feel bored and unmotivated in calmness. The problem is you, recognize it and stop trying to rationalize this break up.
100000% agree. FACTS
FAX BRO
The audiacy of people always amazes me😮 Who are you to tell her what she should do with her own relationship? Even if she was married she can leave any time whatever the reason becouse she is a free woman.
@@martak6959 The audacity of influencers to upload videos about the drama on their personal lives and monetize it in multiple ways with official sponsors included is equaly "amazing". Like she is not a socialité or a member of nobility to consider her love life a topic of public interest. But if you upload a video about your life in a free way trough a free platform, everyone is equaly free of write an opinion for free. And actually this is what she wants, the Lizard Liz knows that comments, positive or negative, equals more money for her, more traffick, more attention, etc. She is doing this because drama is literally her bussiness and this life update is for attention, validation, traffick, engagement and of course money. She is not that innocent and you don't be naive....
@@martak6959 it’s okay to leave, but it’s not okay to normalize compulsions. In the era of tinder everyone became disposable, and it will turn against everyone one way or another. Heal from trauma, then preach on internet.
I was stuck in a situation that was “comfortable” but made me lose myself, now I see the only way to find hope is to have the courage to change and accept the struggles as well . Thank you Liz! Your videos changed my perspective, I changed my habits and now I do believe I can become my dream woman. Be proud of yourself❤️ you helped a lot of people
lose you to love me selena
Sometimes its better to end it because like you stop working on yourself. Thank you sm. I did the same thing once before and people bashed me for it. Thanks a lot for making this video
I had experienced a few toxic relationships and leaving felt like I was born again. Till today I remember how incredibly happy I was out of the circle and because of it, my life turned 100% around for better. I would be miserable if I never left, I know that for sure.
Honestly this makes no sense
Nobody will be perfect ever so when two people love each other and committed to marriage and family, they stay together and help each other get better and evolve.
People got married at 18, at 20 years old and grew together and grew with their kids.
If you want to have friends anyway couples usually befriend other couples and go on vacation with other couples or usually with their siblings and their significant others ‘s sibling.
If you want to have single female friends you can still have them.
I remember a stay at home +50s mom, she is the mother of one of my friends.
She has been a housewife her whole life and she had her married friends so every morning she had her brunch with her married friends.
She didn’t need to get a divorce from her husband to have her friends.
Married people befriends new people, you can befriend other mum at schools etc
So if grown ups can do it why can’t young people do it?
I have a friend who stayed with the same boyfriend she met at 14 years old, they got married at 30 years old a couple of years ago.
They have lots of friends and we go to the clubs together as a group outing, with her husband, single friends, and other couples.
If you broke up simply there is no love and commitment there.
My aunt got married at 17. Her husband was 20. My grandparents were against the marriage saying they were too young.
Well they grew up together! And are still together. They changed a lot and they got into a lot of different stages in their life but they never divorced or broke up to get better single.
If you have real love and real commitment, the fact that you are together with the other person helps you unlocking all your potential.
If you are better single, this means that’s not the person for you and it’s not a real committed love.
True
You are absolutely right
totally agree
This is so true
Exactly