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Will I ALWAYS Be Pregnant if I use NFP? (Natural Family Planning)
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- Опубліковано 18 чер 2023
- The fear of always being pregnant by using natural family planning (NFP) as opposed to contraception is one that overwhelms many. Christopher and Wendy address this.
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NFP has been fantastic for my wife and I. We decided that we would practice it once we got married. We use the Creighton method for both holding off on and achieving pregnancy. So far we have a wonderful baby girl and are hoping to achieve a second pregnancy later this year. We're hoping to have 4 or 5 kids before 40 but we're thankful for whoever God gives us.
Nice, what about 8 kids ? 😃
@@davidlam6702 lol not against it. My wife is one of seven siblings. I just think 4 or 5 will be more realistic given our age.
@@tr1084 That's a wonderful blessing! God bless your family!
@@AnnulmentProof The reason that contraception is a sin is that it perverts the natural design/functioning of the body in sex by thwarting the completion of the sexual act. Natural Family Planning is not a sin as abstinence is a perfectly natural state of the body.
@@AnnulmentProof NFP is about being open to life, which means neither pleasure is above procreation, nor procreation is above pleasure. Like they said in the video : God, if it's your will, let there be life. There can't be a more perfected way of love than to be open to love every human creature that God will confide to us. At least from my point of view. If it's one child, thanks God. If it's two, thanks God. If it's 4, or 5, or 6, thanks God and it goes on and on.
Use the Marquette Method! It has been a game changer for my marriage. Blessings to all
I am 23 with 3 children 3 and under! It's been very difficult and my husband and I are wrestling with using NFP. Our lives have been changed by your guys' videos and we are very, very grateful for your wisdom and understanding. Thank you ❤
Keep the faith! Don't give up! God will provide. Children and family are the best things in life. I wish I would have started at 20. God bless you.
I want to add that your comment about feeling a bit overwhelmed resonated with me. I felt overwhelmed with three also. To clarify my comment above, now that we can't have more than three children, both my husband and I are sad that we didn't have more. We see now that the difficulty of having three small children was just a phase of life that passed. Our three children are the source of our greatest joy in this world.
My previous comment was erased! I posted two, but now there is only one!! I just want to encourage you to use NFP. The Marquette Method has been so much easier than Creighton for us. NFP brought my husband and I to a new level of faith in that we had to fully trust the Lord and surrender to His will. Now that our youngest child is 12 (we have three kids). We regret that NFP works so well 😅. Both my husband and I wish we would have had more. Children are a blessing. I understand the depth of that truth more and more as my kids grow up. They are thoughtful, loving, intelligent, and hilarious. They have added an incalculable amount of joy to my life. Place your trust in the Lord. He is worthy of it, so whatever happens from here, it is for the best! God bless you!
@@jeneriss Thank you for those beautiful comments ♥
I grieve needing to use NFP but I don't do very well mentally during pregnancy and having 3 almost back to back really took a toll on me. Some days I feel like I just have 3 infants! I wish that I was capable of having baby after baby but I don't want to significantly reduce the quality of life of my other children by struggling to follow through with my maternal duties during pregnancy and with a newborn. I'm also not as good of a wife as I would like to be while pregnant. Ugh, sometimes it is such a difficult task discerning God's will for us. I don't want to be liberal with my use of NFP -- that is what is so difficult to discern.
@@AnnulmentProof I believe that things have turned out exactly as God intended, though my husband and I do wish that we would have had more. God bless
I'm crying of joy listening to you. Thank you, dear God, for the gift of life!
Would love to see you guys on the whatever podcast. Your relationship advice needs to be heard by those ears too
We are using NFP and happy with 4 children. God's plan is the best.
You both seem okay with respecting each others fertility and abstaining when necessary. How is one spouse not resentful of the lack of intimacy during times of abstaining? How do you manage wanting to be close but not being able due to the decision that it isn’t time for another child? Or even harder that due to a mistake or difficulty in charting and you do become with child.
It sounds like you tried for children, in my case without trying we become pregnant. I am blessed with high fertility, but if I don’t catch my peak day it can be weeks before Can be intimate with my spouse. That time apart doesn’t bring us closer, at least in my experience. And what if the spouse doesn’t desire another child - and one does come through the possibility of pregnancy or God’s will that you mentioned.
What if one spouse is faithful that God will provide but the provider of the family feels overwhelmed.
It is this reality that makes me feel at odds with my spouse and my fertility. Help and prayers please.
This is my reality as well, are you both practicing your faith? Thank you for this comment.
I've been so scared of this same thing as I enter my early twenties and begin dating, but you two helped put my mind at ease. Thank you for spreading the message of God's unique and beautiful love for each and every one of us.
Fantastic clip, guys, always such great work, Christopher West. If you can, give more understanding of this topic. I suspect it would be much appreciated amongst the Laity as there's just not enough support on this topic out there.
Should Catholics really be using NFP when they don't need to? I get that I don't know everyone's situation, but the Church teaches that NFP is supposed to be used for "grave reasons." Lots of Catholics are using NFP the way someone would use condoms or the pill. I don't think NFP was intended to be used to avoid pregnancy for years and years. Correct me if I'm wrong on that?
it's the case of the church counter action to the wave of birth control that came 60's - This is the case of wanting your cake and eating it too. Basically it was Pope paul 2 during the secret counsel he tried to the stacked deck with all of his own people, so they were supposed to just spit back the answer that he wanted
Well in a strange turn of events so much testimony had been leveled against the the traditional Catholic teaching against contraception that the vast majority of that secret counsel gave him the opposite answer. The answer he was not looking for, the fact that contraception should be used in certain circumstances, so what Paul did was rejected the council's findings and just simply issued humanae vitae, to decide how many children they're going to have.
It is not like contraception but it can be abused. A couple must prayerfully discern if they should be intimate or not during the fertile time. Some women are blessed with very strong fertility and same with their spouse, many children can come very quickly when just being open to life and being intimate during the fertile time of a woman’s cycle. A mother may be overwhelmed physically and emotionally having several small children in quick succession…or a spouse may feel financially unstable. But it must be discerned, that it isn’t simply for selfish or less needed material wants. Each couple will be different and needs to discuss it with each other; every month allows for this discussion. It isn’t like a contraceptive where the woman is left to take a drug, communication can stop for years, etc. Or if the male spouse is using contraception it can lead to a wife feeling used instead of cherished and respected within her God given fertility. So prayer and communication are key, and it is definitely only successful if both couples are trying to live virtuous, holy, and sacrificial lives. Something we are all called to.
@@Maryhelen5I've been reading for maybe forty years they a wife would feel " used" if her husband used contraception ....there is very solid empirical research and science to link a sense of relief that the husband takes responsibility if the couple are not wanting to have another child.
That seems very likely and true. I am assuming it is due to the fact that if the couple isn’t using NFP (where you have to have open communication monthly at the minimum), then it does fall on the woman to be the responsible one taking her pills. It imagine it would be a relief that she wasn’t the one having the surgeries, etc. But again, these couples are ignoring their God given fertility. They are ignoring the realities of their male and female bodies. Rather than accepting that children are part of the bargain and bond they have with one another. If you truly honor your wife’s body a man would provide her the security and protection she needs to bring new life into the world. It takes great virtue to honor this reality and using NFP definitely requires virtue and fortitude. But what a gift to be cherished as God made you. Fear not.
Thank you, and God bless you.
Thank you for sharing . But this didn’t answer the question Or basically your saying . Ya you could be pregnant constantly but you could also not?
Does she teach NFP classes online?
Thumbnail is weird. I'm not sure what it's trying to suggest. That practicing NFP might lead to both black and white babies? That practicing NFP will expose marital infidelities?
Is... is it a sin to use condoms?
This video might help: ua-cam.com/video/zvyPI5OZLUM/v-deo.html
@@TheologyoftheBodyInstituteonly in the Catholic Church.
@@geoffcaflisch1352this is false. It is always a disordered act.
You forgot to mention the cost of children
We live I'm an extremely luxurious society and most people can make sacrifices before falling into destitution. We are extremely blessed but I don't get my hair done, nails done, I shop mostly thrift, etc, etc. We have everything we need but have been blessed to be tight enough financially to not have everything we want. I am grateful for this opportunity to build virtue.
Very well said, I needed this reminder. Thank you ❤️
@@TheYoungCatholicsmost couples are unable to live on a single income but then there seems like pressure for women to stay at home and care for children full time ....if you are open to life and have six or seven or eight children...the possibility of affording daycare do that the family can have two income earners is unlikely. The financial stressors of raising a large family on one income could be more accurately portrayed.
What if God really doesn't care about the size of your family?
If you're a Christian (Protestant or Catholic) both the Bible and the Church have a very long history of stating that children are a blessing from God.
I don't know what kind of God you belive in but the God I know cares about everything in my life, and specially cares about the things I care th most about! He is not indifferent to what happens to us, or what we choose. He knows what is best for us, he hurts when we don't chose that and rejoices when we do!
Our God cares very much about each and everyone of us.
He knows even better that we know ourselves and He guides us if we let him.
If God was indifferent, then I don't think I would believe in Him, and I certainly wouldn't have a relationship with Him.
The fact that God cares is central to our faith
Yes, it is different. And NFP is not contraceptive in the week or so that it involves abstention.
However, what about the week after that? The week where a couple engages in sexual relations only because they know that they will be sterile, and if they thought otherwise, they would not do it. Their hearts and minds intend for their actions to be only unitive and not procreative; if there was a chance of achieving both The functions, then they would back off. Sex only fits into their plans so long as procreation is not a reasonably possible result.
In that week, Natural Family Planning is clearly a contraceptive plan.And because the other three weeks of the month, it's deliberately-sterile sex.
It misses the point not because NFP is bad, but because those advantages are not the official reason the Catholic church promotes it.
It is, however, not in accordance with Humanae Vitae section 14, which uses such terms as "absolutely excluded" and "intrinsically wrong", and specifically rejects the idea of temporary contraception during a married life that otherwise involves procreation as normal. See for yourself: www.vatican.va/cont…
What seems strained to me is to say, "Oh yes, we very deliberately and carefully ensured that we could have sex regularly without getting pregnant, for years, but we don't believe in intentionally separating sex from procreation."- Clearly and simply hypocrisy.
Brillant!
Some couples decide to abstain during the fertile time due to serious health reasons, I know of one example of a woman with type one diabetes and not becoming pregnant allowed her to safely raise the children she did have, while still maintaining a bonding relationship with her spouse. Not to mention, to practice NFP takes lots of virtue, fasting from pleasurable and bonding acts isn’t easy and often is done for sacrificial reasons. I would say don’t be quick to judge. Every couple must pray and discern while practicing NFP. Do you always say yes to your spouse when intimacy is desired? Or have you chosen to reject the sacrament for other reasons…needing a nap, mad at your spouse due to an argument, a sick child needing your care. A couple isn’t having sterile sex while practicing NFP, the body just isn’t prepared for conception.
@@Maryhelen5 "while still maintaining a bonding relationship with her spouse".
That her opinion? - And bonding?
Playing cribbage? ( Yes I would much sooner do that - then have sex?)
Any other Intimacy that it involves being physical that is isn't going to lead to sex is only going to cause frustration and tension for her husband especially if it goes on for months on end.
If her life's in danger from conceiving or being pregnant- I highly doubt there's any sex going on there at all?
I Personally don't care what choice they use to avoid pregnancy.
My point being how is NFP different from using a condom?
Even proponents of NFP claim its "More" effective than a condom.
A plan to engage in limited sex while minimising the chance of conception, then they are intentionally splitting the unitive and procreative functions of sexual relations, seeking to have the first but avoid the second, which is supposed to be the great crime that makes contraception inherently evil according to Catholic doctrine
@sitka49 , to your comment about how is using the infertile times for sex different from using contraceptives (condoms, like you mentioned, or any other drug/device):
The difference is in the couple's intent. If they employ abstinence during the woman's fertile window and resume relations when that time is done, they recognize that the likelihood of conception is lower, but still not zero. There is nothing to prohibit or stop conception from occurring.
Unlike the contracepting couple, who is purposefully blocking or rendering the womb inhospitable for a new life, the couple who uses NFP respects the power of God to create, no matter what cycle day it is.
@@sarareinstatler8681 Yes, NFP may well be a highly effective method of having an active sex life while avoiding conception. A method that has no medical side effects, brings married couples closer, improves their understanding of themselves and each other, and reminds them of their relationship with God. What's not to like?
Except that the official Catholic position on NFP and contraception is not, "NFP is the best, safest, most uplifting form of contraception." Rather, the official Catholic doctrine is, 1) "NFP isn't contraception," and 2) "Contraception is inherently and universally evil."
Point 1) is absurd, and point 2) doesn't stand up to close scrutiny.
As a result, it is entirely possible for someone to agree with every point you make about NFP, while still disagreeing with your conclusion that the Catholic church is getting it right.
To elaborate:
1) NFP enables a couple to engage in sexual relations while intentionally minimising the possibility of conceiving. That is, by definition, a form of contraception. I'll offer a few definitions to make it clear:
The many advantages of NFP why is good
It misses the point not because NFP is bad, but because those advantages are not the official reason the Catholic church promotes it.
And the other three weeks of the month, it's deliberately-sterile sex.
He warned that a man who the Saviour's teaching was that intention "looketh on a woman, to lust after her" has already committed adultery in his heart. There is no need to enquire further about what means the man might have used to act on that lust; he is already condemned and ought to repent.
Surely a couple who looks on the next month, with the intent to be sexually active but not to become pregnant, has already separated the unitive and procreative functions of sexual relations in thier heart.
That's fine, but if it is already established that the intention is (by Catholic standards) morally wrong, there is no need to examine the object used before concluding that the act must necessarily be morally wrong. Using lawful means can never redeem an evil intention.