Thanks for all the (mostly) lovely comments. In the process of working out some live dates so feel free to let me know what city to visit in the comments or via my website. ✌️
Aloha from Hawaii... your video just popped up and started to play. Normally, I have to turn it off immediately but was very surprised that your show was clean & hilarious! I truly enjoyed your comedy. Thank you for the entertainment.
Doggie hitman 😂😂😂 Edit: fun fact: the ‘doggie hitman’ mark in the video wasn’t the peak of the comedy, nearly choked myself trying not to make a sound or move my body, I swear this is not an exaggeration, my lung (or breast muscles?) are aching right now from holding my laughs (traumatized cat on my lap, no moving or sound is essential atm in her recovery) Me wearing noice canceling headphones isn’t the best situation for a successful comedy show, I need my cat to wear one 😂😂
Our realtor found out I'm a stand up comedian, and waited for us to sign our offer and hand her the check before she said, "Oh, and I have to disclose a couple of things, by law. The house is haunted because it's built on sacred burial ground, and the previous owners rented to people who died in the home." Apparently she and my wife were in cahoots, because they both laughed immediately, before I could respond. But I said, "Oh, you're having me on, are you? OK, well, then I guess we'll have to sort out the little girl I kept seeing around the house on our tour."
Fund the police!!! They should be working for the people, not private companies!!! Also change the laws so they stop harassing people and can actually be held accountable...
The rhyme Happy Wife Happy Life was made up by women to make sure that the men did all they could to make their women happy. While those women do not give a damn about their husbands. The saying should be Happy House Happy Spouse. That way it would try to remind the women that their husbands deserve to be happy as well, but the wives still would not care about their men. They will do something to make their husbands happy only if will benefit them the same or more than their husbands.
I was in total agreement with you until you started saying women still wouldn't care about their men. I'm sorry you've personally had a bad experience with women but you're just wrong! "happy spouse happy house" is a phrase I thought I made up in my house😂😂😂 it's 2024 people should take care of eachother and pull their weight in the relationship. Also, make sure you're treating eachother with respect. No one wants to take care of anyone who treats them bad. Good luck to you! - F,38 yrs old, married 21 years
I'm sorry, I can tell some women have caused you a lot of pain but that's your personal experience. I literally thought I made up "happy spouse happy house" 😂😂😂 cuz I use it in my house. My advice: make sure you're doing your part, treat them with respect (we've never called eachother a bad name and we cuss like sailors lol) no one wants to take care of someone who is mean to them! Don't give up. Be the best you and she'll come along 😊 from a 38 yr old F married 21 years from Vegas and we still like eachother! 😂 of course we love but liking someone for 21 years is a different story😂😂 better luck to you ✌️
So you moved to LA, I had wondered why we haven't see you in Edinburgh for a long time. The Bachelor Party in Vegas, I have to ask.....on one of those nights did y'all go to Medieval Times and if so was someone high on way way too many mushrooms?
Laughed a lot. Get an abortion like a responsible adult unless you get famous enough to buy a house for 30 million in 25 years when your kid is getting suicidail being stuck at home with no future. Otherwise hilarious, subscribed and liked, keep it up!
Thanks for all the (mostly) lovely comments. In the process of working out some live dates so feel free to let me know what city to visit in the comments or via my website. ✌️
denver boi
and i'm a legit human being . . . oh damn my name is user-eb1 etc. i think i may be a robot.
3 more weeks
And yes Denver
Minneapolis!!!!
❤
Came across this by absolute chance, such a gem you are my dude, hilarious set!
Thanks so much! Glad you enjoyed. Shout out to the algorithm for doing its thing
Aloha from Hawaii... your video just popped up and started to play. Normally, I have to turn it off immediately but was very surprised that your show was clean & hilarious! I truly enjoyed your comedy. Thank you for the entertainment.
@@mefromthesea9402 Aloha! Thanks for watching. Glad you enjoyed!
Great entertainment!! Excited for your next adventure!!
Also, this show is going on my Classic Stand-up playlist, you're in good company :)
honoured
You have a comedy playlist too? Another person of couture!
Same!!
Fun fact: the guy in the front told me after the show he was just really cold.
Awesome special! Thank you ❤
Glad you liked it!
Excellent! You are a very funny man. It flowed beautifully, well-written and funny all the way through. Thanks!
Thank you!
Omg, I laughed so hard. Even the politics that I don't agree with cracked me up. Shared this with everyone I know that likes comedy
Comedy unites!
Good stuff. Hope to see you in Edenton.
My favourite Chris!
Check out the singer Chris Martin (from Jamaica), you might like his reggae music.
@@jasonjohnson4803 I love Christopher Martin! "I'm a Big Deal" is a banger
You're much funnier than the other Chris Martin. You're easily one of the top below ground comedians
Found this by chance and I'm so glad that I did. This is so funny! Iove every story.
Glad you enjoyed!
Amazing! This should have 10M views!
Thank you! Slowly getting there!
What a great surprise he is!! By chance caught this & laughed so much😂😂😂😂He is crazy talented- hysterical. Don't let the accent through u off
Glad you enjoyed it!
Refreshing material and very funny 😂
Thank you 🙏🏻
Watching from Manchester, England. Really funny set mate. Will be sharing. Much love from here in the UK 👏❤
Manchester! Loved gigging there back in the day
I really enjoyed this! I'll keep my eyes out for more material live and online. Thank you😂
Get yourself on Drybar comedy. Your act is clean and funny 😁
What an awesome show! One of my new favorites!!!
Thank you!
This was hilarious! Hope you come to Australia one day!
Been looking for a new stand up routine and you are brilliant! Looking forward to seeing many many more of your shows.
Brilliant 😂😂
Love your set.😊 Actually laughed out loud 😂
Thanks for watching!
Cheers Chris! That's cheered me right up this morning!!!
thanks Slim!
Love your comedy. I wanna be a comedian one day. 👍
My favorite comedian so far 😂😂I gotta catch a show
Please come along! Mailing list for all that info is on my website.
Shit what a funny fucking show from start to finish. Loved the closing joke that was a good one to finish on. Fuck Yes dude!! Awesom
Thanks so much for watching and glad you enjoyed
😂😂😂 Great set! Loads of gems and stories, loved rotisserie burglar😂 Subbed, new from the Netherlands!
Ha! Thanks for the kind words. Love 🇳🇱 thank you for creating Dennis Bergkamp
"breezy butthole"
I laughed so hard!
Please come to the Seattle area!
I have a date in September 26th! Tix: www.chrismartincomedy.co.uk see you there!
Wow, good newbie! Love it!
Thank you! 😊
Great job Chris !
So glad I found this
Wonderful special! 😂❤
Thank you!
This set slaps like my stepmom. Veddy nice.
Love this!
Hahaha! That vax card as “proof” joke was spot on!!! Omg wow
I laughed so much I have tears
Glad you enjoyed!
I loved Babysitting Trevor . More please
Uncle Trev!
@@chrismcomedy I love Trev he’s very close to my heart
Come to New York!
Very funny 😅
Doggie hitman 😂😂😂
Edit: fun fact: the ‘doggie hitman’ mark in the video wasn’t the peak of the comedy, nearly choked myself trying not to make a sound or move my body, I swear this is not an exaggeration, my lung (or breast muscles?) are aching right now from holding my laughs (traumatized cat on my lap, no moving or sound is essential atm in her recovery)
Me wearing noice canceling headphones isn’t the best situation for a successful comedy show, I need my cat to wear one 😂😂
😂😂 can't breathe 😂😂😂
😂
Isn't it just the most profound irony how dumb fish are, even though they travel around in a group called a school?
sooo funny 😂😂😂
Hilarious!!! 😂😂😂
I think we should all agree to call the nurses who work in the basements of clubs "Resurrection Specialists".
Can’t waaaait!!
Soooo funny
Brilliant 😂
An excellent break from Coldplay!
I see myself as a ground adjacent comedian
Hahaha “i just want justice in the world”
😂😂
Our realtor found out I'm a stand up comedian, and waited for us to sign our offer and hand her the check before she said, "Oh, and I have to disclose a couple of things, by law. The house is haunted because it's built on sacred burial ground, and the previous owners rented to people who died in the home."
Apparently she and my wife were in cahoots, because they both laughed immediately, before I could respond. But I said, "Oh, you're having me on, are you? OK, well, then I guess we'll have to sort out the little girl I kept seeing around the house on our tour."
LOL
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 my stomach
31:39 Jim Jefferies wants his Having-a-Baby joke back but otherwise nice stuff.
Fund the police!!! They should be working for the people, not private companies!!! Also change the laws so they stop harassing people and can actually be held accountable...
hilarious
thank you!
never thought this set got off the ground. no laughs.
Good luck to the newcomer.
Thank you for posting this on UA-cam bro.
Very good show.
Thanks so much for watching 🙏🏻🙏🏻
The rhyme Happy Wife Happy Life was made up by women to make sure that the men did all they could to make their women happy. While those women do not give a damn about their husbands.
The saying should be Happy House Happy Spouse. That way it would try to remind the women that their husbands deserve to be happy as well, but the wives still would not care about their men. They will do something to make their husbands happy only if will benefit them the same or more than their husbands.
I was in total agreement with you until you started saying women still wouldn't care about their men. I'm sorry you've personally had a bad experience with women but you're just wrong! "happy spouse happy house" is a phrase I thought I made up in my house😂😂😂 it's 2024 people should take care of eachother and pull their weight in the relationship. Also, make sure you're treating eachother with respect. No one wants to take care of anyone who treats them bad. Good luck to you! - F,38 yrs old, married 21 years
I'm sorry, I can tell some women have caused you a lot of pain but that's your personal experience. I literally thought I made up "happy spouse happy house" 😂😂😂 cuz I use it in my house. My advice: make sure you're doing your part, treat them with respect (we've never called eachother a bad name and we cuss like sailors lol) no one wants to take care of someone who is mean to them! Don't give up. Be the best you and she'll come along 😊 from a 38 yr old F married 21 years from Vegas and we still like eachother! 😂 of course we love but liking someone for 21 years is a different story😂😂 better luck to you ✌️
So you moved to LA, I had wondered why we haven't see you in Edinburgh for a long time.
The Bachelor Party in Vegas, I have to ask.....on one of those nights did y'all go to Medieval Times and if so was someone high on way way too many mushrooms?
ahaha. That was a a different stag do there! This stag do happened the year before the Excaliber one!
@@chrismcomedy So you were at the Excaliber one as well? Ok :D
Nice getting vaccinated
Not all of them are manly some does not know their genders. 😂😂
Laughed a lot. Get an abortion like a responsible adult unless you get famous enough to buy a house for 30 million in 25 years when your kid is getting suicidail being stuck at home with no future. Otherwise hilarious, subscribed and liked, keep it up!
Right wing podcast? Now you know why no one has heard of you.
Terrible. Other chris Martin is funnier