I was a food service director for 25 years in assisted living. I can tell you a lot. 1 thing, “A Place for Mom” knows nothing about the communities they recommend. It’s a sell referral service. Assisted living is a crappy place to be. Listen to Josh avoid having to have to go in there.
Kriss is right on there are so many adults out here that refuse to understand if they don't plan for there future a stranger will and will have there hand in your pocket all the way. Great content learning every day thanks.
Josh, it's scary after 60. Before 60 you don't think about death like you do after. I'm usually positive, but somehow those thoughts always sneak in. I have been the "financial planner" in our household ever since we got married and it scares me because now on the verge of retirement my husband isn't interested in any of the aspects of retirement at all. Im worried that if anything happened to me he will not be able to manage and some may take advantage of this. He would rather pay someone to do it for him without even understanding it. We are to meet with our friend who's retired CPA, so maybe he will be able to help. Josh, you're so easy going and your videos are so easy to understand. Keep it rolling 👍
Kriss, you are not alone in this in the least. Trust me, in nearly ALL the families I've dealt with over my long career very few times has both couples been engaged . The vast vast majority has one spouse completely in charge with the other completely oblivious and just not caring. Yesterday was our 19th anniversary and you could count on one finger then number of times she's actually logged into to check our bank accounts. Just like you, it bothers me to no end to think of the scoundrels out there who'd take advantage of her and even worse that she wouldn't know it! So,what I've done, first recognized the fact she isn't interested and probably never will be, and then identify someone for her to call if I got hit by a bus. And then told that someone too that he/she is my go-to guy if I'm gone. Probalby the best thing you can do if your spouse just wont' budge.
Yep, I hear ya, except that he thinks he doesn't need anybody to tell him what to do. He says he'll figure it out. I created a list of all accounts and steps to take for him and our kids in case anything happened, but hopefully our CPA friend will change his perspective on retirement, money, taxes, etc. Thanks for your reply Josh.
I'm 70 and a retired RN so i don't worry about death nor how to take care of myself and when I can't, i can direct my care for my needs. It's not rocket science and anyone can research all about their medical conditions as information is just a click away... stick to genuine medical sites and experts on YT
The truth is people in assisted living are there because they have the funds. Work in a facility that is not skilled. Most every resident in the building should be in skilled. Most are in wheel chairs the rest use walkers. Assisted living facility residents come through the front door but you leave through the back when you die. They will keep you as long as you can pay the bill matter what your care level is. It is rare to came across someone that only needs a little help. What I have noticed is most have severe Alzheimer's, dementia, late stage Parkinson's or major stroke. No lift facility is just on paper. Expecting someone who can't walk or stand to get up and use the toilet without being lifted is ridiculous. But that is about 70 percent of the residents. They fall all the time. It is a cheap way to have aids do skill care for non skilled pay. The aid to resident ratio is one aid pre floor. At night it is 2 aids for the whole unit. How can 2 aids care for 40 plus residents when most do not sleep need toileted every 2hours? Assistant living is not able to.provide the care people who need dressed, fed , lifted out of bed, 24/7 supervision. Aids do not follow residents who have dementia around all day. Once your money runs out then you are told your care level is beyond what that facility can provide. People move in because they can't take care of themselves. Not because they love playing bingo and processed cafeteria food.
I 100% agree, moving my dad from assisted living to nursing home this week. My dad had me visit him every day and help out for a couple hours so it was a good arrangement. I cleaned him and changed his linens.
I should add that I‘ve been in assisted living so yes, it’s not truly a nursing home; it’s for people a step or two above nursing home patients although some have rooms for memory care. The staff members are overwhelmed and paranoid about lawsuits
I worked at several Assisted living facilities in different states later in my nursing career as nurses backs are damaged but now we have Hoyer Lifts and other assistive devices to assist us with our patients/residents and if they fall in the AL, we call an ambulance.... in longer term care, we have to pick them up off the floor and assess them to see if Emergency Care services are needed and we decide if the facility can transport them or if an Ambulance is needed for a broken bone, heart attack etc.
A Place for Mom is a wonderful resource for information. They do not push one place or another. You let them know what you are looking for and they'll send you information regardless of the type of facility you are needing.
2 warnings 1. Very expensive. $ 6,000 a month in NY suburbs to start for just room and board. Anything else is extra. Diabetic cousin on oxygen was $15,000 a month. 2. It is the most insecure living arrangement. You are not a tenant, but legally a hotel guest. Go in at 85 but if you are frailer at 92, they can boot you with 30 days notice. You have no lease. Now you are older, frailer, pooret and homeless. Beware.
The only problem with assisted living is the lack of skilled nursing, there is none. For example if your parent becomes ill and is in need of a daily feeding tube, you would be forced to private pay $90-150 dollars a day to a healthcare professional to come in to administer food 7 days a week on top of what you are already paying for assisted living. Therefore it is beneficial to have a contract you can get out of easily and move your parent to a different facility based on their needs.
Thank you so much for sharing this video. It can be very challenging to speak with our older generations about when it's time to seek out help. There seems to be a lot of negativity associated with "moving into a home"
@@HeritageWealthPlanning haha yes we are an actual facility. I am Katie, the social media manager, but I think it would be great to have our founder interviewed! What email can I reach you at?
Assisted living in most places is an originally well intentioned turned greedy scam. I've worked in it for 10 years. Dementia to independent living. You pay for way more then they can actually give. If you them keep them home or offer in home care . Assisted living and memory care should be treated as the last resort. this is coming from an insider.
I learned a lot , i have had my mom and dad in 2 different assisted living facilities let me say they promise the world and then dont deliver!! If yourr loved ones have mild dementia be sure you stay on top of them! They hire CNAs who have thick heavy accents and eypect the elderly to under stand them most dont have RNs or LPNs they use cheaper QMAs for meds ( a QMA told me she wasn't supposed to put a bandaid on my dads small cut but she did😕) if something happens big or small all they can do is call an ambulance hell they can't even do the helimch manover and these places are 4,000.00 and up a month🤬
All assisted living facility's have 1 RN on duty during the day and another on call at night. They are given the title of Director of Nursing staff ~ DON ~ those with RN's v LPN's or LVN's better serve the patient's medical needs.
Assisted Living facilities r extremely expensive. My sister passed away from Lewy Bodies Dementia, in memory care, at The residence, in Darien, CT. She was there for 3 years. They took great care of my sister, and hospice came at the end, when she was no longer eating. U have yo have great private insurance, for these places. It cost 3700 a month, to house my sister there. That doesn't include, doctors, nurses, caregivers, and food arrangement. These facilities r run by big corporations, so be careful.
A wonderful thing about having a loved one live in a assisted living-type facility is the many opportunities for socialization available. I work at St. Anne's, a home for the elderly and disabled in Grand Forks, ND. We see here what a difference living here can make. It benefits the whole person: physical, emotional, and spiritual. www.stannesguesthome.org
Blessings to you sister Christina! I had 2 great uncles who became priests. One in Brazil the other in an Indian reservation in Montana and a great aunt was a sister in Argentina if memory serves
Can an ALF(Assisted Living) take my Mom's LINK card when they are already getting funded by the state with her SS check? My mother qualified for Medicaid and the state sent her a LINK card for groceries. She has no need for the groceries since she stays at the assisted living place. However, the facility asked for this LINK card stating that this would also go to help pay for her meals. This bit of information was never given to me in the beginning of applying for Medicaid for my mother. Is this common for facilities to do this?
I am trying to help my ex-husband get into assisted living. He only has Social security and two small retirement checks. He has no assets in a very limited savings account will it be possible to get him into assisted living?
Thank you so much!!! I’m about to search for an independent living (perhaps even assisted. Not sure yet) for my mom. She is in another state and I need to bring her to me. How do I find help to get her packed up?
@susana rylander -- Contact a Certified Senior Move Manager through NASSMM (National Association of Senior Move Managers). They can help with ALL of your mom's moving needs, from packing up, to setting her up in her new place. They'll even put her dishes in the kitchen cabinets, and have her bed made and waiting for her! More info here: www.nasmm.org/ Good luck!
A place for mom is a company that is a complete rip-off!!! They make money from you by finding a place for mom! You can find the place on your own! They tried to get $2500.00 up front and than they get kickbacks from the place you chose!!!!! DO NOT USE A PLACE FOR MOM PURE RIP JOB!!!!!!
Can't believe the number of videos you are putting out. It hardly gives me time to listen and digest. This one is super important as we been working slowly in our End Of life plan. Nowadays, people have to have an exit plan as we aged eventually into a liability to our family and society. 2/3 of people are going to need long term care and insurance has gotten prohibited. What to do when you are aging and do not want to be a liability to children raising their own children or others. The needs of the aging are significant and every financial plan should have ways on how you plan to address your needs. No, it's not your kids problem, it is ours.
Well, this is my full time job now! I quit my job in March to devote full time to sharing my knowledge with anyone who wants to listen. I said I'd do this until I ran out of money. But i enjoy doing these video's immensely. Who knows? maybe UA-cam will pay the bills??? Okay, regarding the 2/3 needing long term care... I am encouraging people not to sweat this so much... Here are a bunch of videos' I 've done on this topic. ua-cam.com/video/i0O-6brjtJs/v-deo.html ua-cam.com/video/7O5B-wDVZ20/v-deo.html ua-cam.com/video/475Y_vL9bHw/v-deo.html
I was a food service director for 25 years in assisted living. I can tell you a lot. 1 thing, “A Place for Mom” knows nothing about the communities they recommend. It’s a sell referral service. Assisted living is a crappy place to be. Listen to Josh avoid having to have to go in there.
I know the truth. Ask me. In NY state cost run around 6000 a month. More for add ons. ALP (assisted living program) pays half.
The more I hear the more I have to disagree with this guy. Not you.
Kriss is right on there are so many adults out here that refuse to understand if they don't plan for there future a stranger will and will have there hand in your pocket all the way. Great content learning every day thanks.
could not agree more, Bruce. Great comment!
We agree. We hear so many stories about families waiting too long to talk to their parents/loved ones about moving into assisted living
Josh, it's scary after 60. Before 60 you don't think about death like you do after. I'm usually positive, but somehow those thoughts always sneak in. I have been the "financial planner" in our household ever since we got married and it scares me because now on the verge of retirement my husband isn't interested in any of the aspects of retirement at all. Im worried that if anything happened to me he will not be able to manage and some may take advantage of this. He would rather pay someone to do it for him without even understanding it. We are to meet with our friend who's retired CPA, so maybe he will be able to help. Josh, you're so easy going and your videos are so easy to understand. Keep it rolling 👍
Kriss, you are not alone in this in the least. Trust me, in nearly ALL the families I've dealt with over my long career very few times has both couples been engaged . The vast vast majority has one spouse completely in charge with the other completely oblivious and just not caring.
Yesterday was our 19th anniversary and you could count on one finger then number of times she's actually logged into to check our bank accounts.
Just like you, it bothers me to no end to think of the scoundrels out there who'd take advantage of her and even worse that she wouldn't know it!
So,what I've done, first recognized the fact she isn't interested and probably never will be, and then identify someone for her to call if I got hit by a bus. And then told that someone too that he/she is my go-to guy if I'm gone. Probalby the best thing you can do if your spouse just wont' budge.
Yep, I hear ya, except that he thinks he doesn't need anybody to tell him what to do. He says he'll figure it out. I created a list of all accounts and steps to take for him and our kids in case anything happened, but hopefully our CPA friend will change his perspective on retirement, money, taxes, etc. Thanks for your reply Josh.
@@krissto22 God Bless your soul ameen
I'm 70 and a retired RN so i don't worry about death nor how to take care of myself and when I can't, i can direct my care for my needs. It's not rocket science and anyone can research all about their medical conditions as information is just a click away... stick to genuine medical sites and experts on YT
Thanks for all this great information! So many of us are going through this journey right now - every quality resource is SO helpful!
I'm willing to bet the vast majority of assisted living places don't care . I've seen it with my own eyes the way they treat my mom
We had luck with a Benchmark community
The truth is people in assisted living are there because they have the funds. Work in a facility that is not skilled. Most every resident in the building should be in skilled. Most are in wheel chairs the rest use walkers. Assisted living facility residents come through the front door but you leave through the back when you die. They will keep you as long as you can pay the bill matter what your care level is. It is rare to came across someone that only needs a little help. What I have noticed is most have severe Alzheimer's, dementia, late stage Parkinson's or major stroke. No lift facility is just on paper. Expecting someone who can't walk or stand to get up and use the toilet without being lifted is ridiculous. But that is about 70 percent of the residents. They fall all the time. It is a cheap way to have aids do skill care for non skilled pay. The aid to resident ratio is one aid pre floor. At night it is 2 aids for the whole unit. How can 2 aids care for 40 plus residents when most do not sleep need toileted every 2hours? Assistant living is not able to.provide the care people who need dressed, fed , lifted out of bed, 24/7 supervision. Aids do not follow residents who have dementia around all day. Once your money runs out then you are told your care level is beyond what that facility can provide. People move in because they can't take care of themselves. Not because they love playing bingo and processed cafeteria food.
I 100% agree, moving my dad from assisted living to nursing home this week. My dad had me visit him every day and help out for a couple hours so it was a good arrangement. I cleaned him and changed his linens.
He can't walk anymore. So we got to move.
I should add that I‘ve been in assisted living so yes, it’s not truly a nursing home; it’s for people a step or two above nursing home patients although some have rooms for memory care. The staff members are overwhelmed and paranoid about lawsuits
I worked at several Assisted living facilities in different states later in my nursing career as nurses backs are damaged but now we have Hoyer Lifts and other assistive devices to assist us with our patients/residents and if they fall in the AL, we call an ambulance.... in longer term care, we have to pick them up off the floor and assess them to see if Emergency Care services are needed and we decide if the facility can transport them or if an Ambulance is needed for a broken bone, heart attack etc.
A Place for Mom is a wonderful resource for information. They do not push one place or another. You let them know what you are looking for and they'll send you information regardless of the type of facility you are needing.
Great advice!
My mother was in an assisted living "paradise" for two years. The experience was a total nightmare.....😮
2 warnings
1. Very expensive. $ 6,000 a month in NY suburbs to start for just room and board. Anything else is extra. Diabetic cousin on oxygen was $15,000 a month.
2. It is the most insecure living arrangement. You are not a tenant, but legally a hotel guest. Go in at 85 but if you are frailer at 92, they can boot you with 30 days notice. You have no lease. Now you are older, frailer, pooret and homeless. Beware.
The only problem with assisted living is the lack of skilled nursing, there is none. For example if your parent becomes ill and is in need of a daily feeding tube, you would be forced to private pay $90-150 dollars a day to a healthcare professional to come in to administer food 7 days a week on top of what you are already paying for assisted living. Therefore it is beneficial to have a contract you can get out of easily and move your parent to a different facility based on their needs.
Thank you so much for sharing this video. It can be very challenging to speak with our older generations about when it's time to seek out help. There seems to be a lot of negativity associated with "moving into a home"
Are you an actual facility? Be interested to interview you if so ab what people going this route need to be thinking of
@@HeritageWealthPlanning haha yes we are an actual facility. I am Katie, the social media manager, but I think it would be great to have our founder interviewed! What email can I reach you at?
Assisted living in most places is an originally well intentioned turned greedy scam. I've worked in it for 10 years. Dementia to independent living. You pay for way more then they can actually give.
If you them keep them home or offer in home care .
Assisted living and memory care should be treated as the last resort. this is coming from an insider.
Very informative! Thank you for sharing this!
I learned a lot , i have had my mom and dad in 2 different assisted living facilities let me say they promise the world and then dont deliver!! If yourr loved ones have mild dementia be sure you stay on top of them! They hire CNAs who have thick heavy accents and eypect the elderly to under stand them most dont have RNs or LPNs they use cheaper QMAs for meds ( a QMA told me she wasn't supposed to put a bandaid on my dads small cut but she did😕) if something happens big or small all they can do is call an ambulance hell they can't even do the helimch manover and these places are 4,000.00 and up a month🤬
All assisted living facility's have 1 RN on duty during the day and another on call at night. They are given the title of Director of Nursing staff ~ DON ~ those with RN's v LPN's or LVN's better serve the patient's medical needs.
And it will make you go broke, try to stay independent as long as you can unless perhaps you have long term care insurance
Assisted Living facilities r extremely expensive. My sister passed away from Lewy Bodies Dementia, in memory care, at The residence, in Darien, CT. She was there for 3 years. They took great care of my sister, and hospice came at the end, when she was no longer eating. U have yo have great private insurance, for these places. It cost 3700 a month, to house my sister there. That doesn't include, doctors, nurses, caregivers, and food arrangement. These facilities r run by big corporations, so be careful.
A wonderful thing about having a loved one live in a assisted living-type facility is the many opportunities for socialization available. I work at St. Anne's, a home for the elderly and disabled in Grand Forks, ND. We see here what a difference living here can make. It benefits the whole person: physical, emotional, and spiritual.
www.stannesguesthome.org
Blessings to you sister Christina!
I had 2 great uncles who became priests. One in Brazil the other in an Indian reservation in Montana and a great aunt was a sister in Argentina if memory serves
Can an ALF(Assisted Living) take my Mom's LINK card when they are already getting funded by the state with her SS check?
My mother qualified for Medicaid and the state sent her a LINK card for groceries. She has no need for the groceries since she stays at the assisted living place. However, the facility asked for this LINK card stating that this would also go to help pay for her meals. This bit of information was never given to me in the beginning of applying for Medicaid for my mother. Is this common for facilities to do this?
This is a rapidly growing issue. The more information the better!
Thank you ! Very informative!
I am trying to help my ex-husband get into assisted living. He only has Social security and two small retirement checks. He has no assets in a very limited savings account will it be possible to get him into assisted living?
Thank you this is very helpful
Thank you so much!!! I’m about to search for an independent living (perhaps even assisted. Not sure yet) for my mom. She is in another state and I need to bring her to me. How do I find help to get her packed up?
@susana rylander -- Contact a Certified Senior Move Manager through NASSMM (National Association of Senior Move Managers). They can help with ALL of your mom's moving needs, from packing up, to setting her up in her new place. They'll even put her dishes in the kitchen cabinets, and have her bed made and waiting for her!
More info here: www.nasmm.org/ Good luck!
Get your Policies and Procedures at www.amazon.com/Policies-Procedures-Manual-Assisted-Facilities/dp/1696136571/
I have long term care Ins. for my wife and I. Will that pay for assisted living or is that just for a skilled nursing facility?
Harry-you have to call your plan-different long term care insurance companies offer different coverage and benefits.
Great info. Thank you
Thank you!
Since assisted living is self pay even those that are in nursing home stage are welcome if they have the cash
Indeed. But most have the cash in a retirement acct this all distributions are taxed! Ugj
A place for mom is a company that is a complete rip-off!!! They make money from you by finding a place for mom! You can find the place on your own! They tried to get $2500.00 up front and than they get kickbacks from the place you chose!!!!! DO NOT USE A PLACE FOR MOM PURE RIP JOB!!!!!!
Can't believe the number of videos you are putting out. It hardly gives me time to listen and digest.
This one is super important as we been working slowly in our End Of life plan.
Nowadays, people have to have an exit plan as we aged eventually into a liability to our family and society.
2/3 of people are going to need long term care and insurance has gotten prohibited. What to do when you are aging and do not want to be a liability to children raising their own children or others. The needs of the aging are significant and every financial plan should have ways on how you plan to address your needs. No, it's not your kids problem, it is ours.
Well, this is my full time job now! I quit my job in March to devote full time to sharing my knowledge with anyone who wants to listen.
I said I'd do this until I ran out of money. But i enjoy doing these video's immensely. Who knows? maybe UA-cam will pay the bills???
Okay, regarding the 2/3 needing long term care... I am encouraging people not to sweat this so much... Here are a bunch of videos' I 've done on this topic. ua-cam.com/video/i0O-6brjtJs/v-deo.html ua-cam.com/video/7O5B-wDVZ20/v-deo.html
ua-cam.com/video/475Y_vL9bHw/v-deo.html
@@HeritageWealthPlanning Thanks, got it.
Gutsy call on quting the job and hope you are successful and able to pay the bills and more.
Own a Licensed Assisted Living Facility in Arizona for only $419K - www.Gardenia.care/
Stay away from "Discovery Village" indep & assist liv campus - Bradenton, Fl. Bad mgt and poorly designed facility from direct experience.