How to stop impulse shopping and tips for emotional spending

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 22 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 73

  • @scandiclinda
    @scandiclinda 8 місяців тому +43

    Omg: "Shopping to feel like being a part of a community" hit me like a bloody train 😮 100 %

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  8 місяців тому +3

      I'm glad you could resonate with it. It's so crazy how much we try to connect with others even though our purchasing decisions.

  • @nanbaron6713
    @nanbaron6713 Рік тому +68

    Reverse the Anchor Price Problem by asking yourself how much you would be willing to pay, before checking the price. 75% of the time, what I would happily pay and what they want from me will make me straight up laugh; which makes it sooo much easier to walk away from the hunt! Even if I do love the piece, I will happily keep looking for something a little better and a little more my price 8)

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  Рік тому +2

      That’s a great tip! Thanks for sharing ❤️

    • @CassRudolph
      @CassRudolph 5 місяців тому +2

      this is actually a genius approach I hadn' t considered applying to spending money! going to try it and see if it changes my mind on potential buys.

    • @kalliemj
      @kalliemj 5 місяців тому

      When I’m shopping if it’s an item I like but the cost seems high or I’m not 100% sold on an item (I.e I like it but I’m not sure I really need it) I often ask whoever is with me or send a photo to family and ask do you like this and what would you spend on this. If they don’t like it and I love it, I’d still get it but if I was on the fence about it and they don’t like it I won’t get it. Now if they like it and I like it and they say a price that is above the actual value I get it but it the amount they say Is below the value I often don’t get it. Now if after I hear what they say and I’m considering it I will tell them the actual cost and ask if they think it’s unreasonable. If they say yes it’s too high I instantly put it back but if they hear the brand and the price and they say oh that’s a good deal for that then I will get it. It’s a juggling act but I really value their opinions and I’ll often get more than one opinion because everyone sees things differently.
      For aesthetics I trust my sisters opinion more than my mom and for cost my mom has a better understanding of price but my sister would see things in a more frugal manner so she might know of a cheaper place to get the same item or might have seen something similar for a fraction of the price so I use them both as a range. There are also some items my sister wouldn’t know the value of like art or hand crafted pottery but my mom does. So I definitely play to their strengths.
      It’s a huge help to get other peoples opinion

    • @jennydow3169
      @jennydow3169 19 днів тому +1

      I love this idea. I am very contemplative still with my shopping addiction. I think this would be a solid tool to help me move towards spending less.

  • @greeneghost44
    @greeneghost44 7 місяців тому +39

    I love this video. I’m a compulsive shopper and one of the worst parts about it for me (second to the credit card debt I keep getting into…) is not being able to trust myself. I’ll be so motivated and then I slip and just spend money and I don’t know how to stop. If I don’t buy the item I just sit and obsess over it and I’m so easily influenced

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  7 місяців тому +4

      I'm so glad you enjoyed the podcast! Definitely check out paige's channel she has so much content dedicated the specific concerns your expressing also if it's accessible to you this a great topic to bring up to a therapist to help you maybe uncover the reason for the impulses.

    • @alivingpotato7056
      @alivingpotato7056 Місяць тому +2

      I feel everything you wrote!!

  • @blackhairedfake
    @blackhairedfake 5 місяців тому +9

    This was so helpful. I make 10 times the money I made a year ago, and even though I've saved a lot and don't have debt, I still spend 90% of what I earn on shopping. It's like my mind tries to find where there are "gaps" like if I supposedly need something to decorate my living room, or new athleisure, or a new bracelet because my arm is looking empty, and stupid things like that to justify my spending. I also hide all the packages I get on the mail. I will throw the boxes away before my partner will see them... Just this month I was feeling like I had "extra" money because I got paid a little bit more than I usually get paid, and I decided to buy a Cartier watch right then and there. I didn't even had a Cartier watch on my wishlist or anything. 🥵 It was really eye-opening hearing someone speak about how you can have a shopping addiction without having debt. I was always justifying my shopping habits because I have enough money to live and save. But still spending thousands of dollars every month on STUFF is so stupid. I need to stop.

  • @KeliOConnor
    @KeliOConnor 10 місяців тому +26

    I think the reasons why we don’t talk enough about shopping addiction are 1) it’s a “women’s issue” and 2) our society runs on capitalism. I see gambling addiction billboards up and down I95 because it’s a “man’s addiction;” if more men had genuine shopping addictions, it would’ve had its own ICD10 code by now (not "impulse control disorder, not otherwise classified") like gambling does. Also, if we stopped shopping in a society built on shopping, what would happen to the nation’s economy? It’s in the nation’s best interest to keep us shopping. In the words of the late American poet Whitney Houston, “It’s not right, but it’s okay.” Thanks for the conversation!

    • @janehex
      @janehex 10 місяців тому +4

      This country worked for centuries in more of a service based economy: you spent extra money on having things mended or fixed, instead of just throwing the thing away and getting a new one. Capitalism became completely unchecked in the past 100 years, and advertising began to use psychology more powerfully. So here we are. And you'll only hear about buying nothing on platforms like UA-cam -- a traditional media network would never suggest that anyone ever stop shopping.

  • @tiyya91
    @tiyya91 11 місяців тому +15

    I’m normally not a compulsive shopper ,but these last couple of months have been running me dry. The “sales” tactics have really been effecting me . Thanks for this conversation

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  11 місяців тому

      It’s hard for most people at the end of the year because you get so many ads it’s rough 🥹

    • @AshleySpeaks4U
      @AshleySpeaks4U 9 місяців тому

      Remember that retailers are NOT in your best interest. The greed in this country has hit a fever pitch. Remember that NOTHING is actually ON a "sale". Prices have been jacked so high that a "sale" is what the product NEEDED to be priced to BEGIN with. Meanwhile, that sweater is plastic garbage, and cost $2 to create and ship.

  • @naikajean356
    @naikajean356 10 місяців тому +8

    This was a great conversation; Paige is very knowledgeable and I love how she broke down the internal struggles and how to process them for the best outcome. "How you feel on the journey is how you're going to feel when you arrive." Such a worrdd!! I am that person that beats herself down to get a task done and I absolutely agree with her; criticizing and hating ourselves on the journey does not help us at all in the long run.

  • @christinakellagher7594
    @christinakellagher7594 11 місяців тому +12

    Out of the many videos on this subject in UA-cam, this is the most comprehensive one I’ve come across. Thank you! Many great points discussed here. 😊

  • @LydiaKrow
    @LydiaKrow 3 місяці тому +3

    My tip for Amazon: I set up a few wish lists for things that I purchase regularly - toiletries, skin and hair care, food items, etc. Then when I need to replenish these I have a link on my browser DIRECTLY to each wish list. I load up, check out, and it really minimizes impulse buying. I say minimize because now Amazon is smart enough to try to entice you with things "before you check out." LOL My other tip is to have a "Delayed Gratification" wishlist (or whatever you want to call it) and put stuff you would normally buy on there. I set myself a $15 limit - if it's over that and it isn't on a wish list because I buy it regularly, I slap it there and go back later. If I'm like "eh I don't care" then I delete it, but if I'm still like "yes this will help" I buy it. About half the time I found it cos I heard about a cool gadget or it popped up while I was doing something else and after the initial euphoria passes, I can come back with a more objective POV.

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  3 місяці тому

      @@LydiaKrow so many great tips 🫶 thanks for sharing!

  • @biganimekitties5763
    @biganimekitties5763 3 місяці тому +2

    Amazing video! My issue is thrifting. I find something I like and think its the only one and its at a discounted rate but then end up never wearing it and re donating it when I try to declutter.

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  3 місяці тому

      If you can separate the new thrifted clothes somewhere you can see them more often that way you can gravitate towards wearing or just be more aware of what you have. I’ve fallen into the same trap of buying just because it’s at a low price.

  • @Clowd_Dee_Day
    @Clowd_Dee_Day 7 місяців тому +6

    This Quote right here
    “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become. - James Clear.

  • @sophiad.2245
    @sophiad.2245 10 місяців тому +8

    I loved the part about sales, I often struggle with buying things I don’t really need because I feel I’m getting a bargain by buying things on sale. I’m now trying to use sales more strategically so I can buy things I actually need when they’re discounted. I think a big part is that in the past sales happened only maybe 3 times a year, whereas now as you say there’s a sale of some kind all the time, which tricks us into buying more stuff. The cheap/on sale things end up being worse for our wallets cause often times they’re not even good quality so we don’t make as much use of them, and we end up buying replacements soon. Also, if we put together all the cheap stuff we’ve bought it ends up being more expensive than buying one expensive good quality item that we’ll make use of.

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  10 місяців тому +1

      Yes! Can totally relate I now just keep a note on my notes app with purchases I want to make and when I have the money to buy it I do but I let time to sit with it first before I impulsively buy it because I love to buy sweaters 🤪 and I live in Texas it gets cold here like max 2 months.

    • @AshleySpeaks4U
      @AshleySpeaks4U 9 місяців тому

      You have to keep in mind how the modern "sale" works. A plastic sweater cost them $3 to produce and ship. It is priced $29.99-a rip off. It goes on "sale" for $17.99, which is what that sweater should have been priced to begin with. That is a FAIR price. So nobody gets a "bargain" anymore. That concept is extinct.

    • @AshleySpeaks4U
      @AshleySpeaks4U 9 місяців тому

      Unfortunately, manufacturers have decided that producing quality products is FAR less profitable than selling flawed trash. Every company has jumped on this bandwagon. The sheets and comforter I bought 20 years ago finally wore out. The comforter and sheets I bought last year are already garbage-they already shredded. I paid around $600 for just ONE YEAR. Meanwhile, I spent $1,000 on that previous bedding, and was good for 20 years. So sadly, I have not found quality for over a decade now. 😢

  • @trishs.4326
    @trishs.4326 Місяць тому +1

    I feel so ashamed I am suffering PTSD Driven lack of money trigger & I tarted after my permanently debilitating injury I sustained from workplace injury, I’ve been buying cloths & Art supplies as a means of therapy . But I have been in some kind of Fog 🌫️ & didn’t relies that I spent what I should not have touched in the first place . I feel worthless ashamed and all the feels and not having a wage of any kind to call my own . Except for the money that I am grateful that my husband can spare to give me , as we only now have one wage .😓😣 I really need & want to over come and rid myself of this senseless spending on stuff .

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  Місяць тому

      The first step is self awareness. I hope this video was helpful.

  • @catheriner6675
    @catheriner6675 Місяць тому

    Thank you so much for this. Late comment but I cant wait to transfer my quick notes into my bullet journal because I’m sick and focusing on self improvement at this point in life ❤ after 22 years I’m finally putting me first. (not trying to be negative about the past but shedding a positive light on the present)

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  Місяць тому

      It's never too late to prioritize yourself, I'm so happy this video resonated with you!

  • @kira5612
    @kira5612 Рік тому +5

    I was literally just thinking about this topic and right as I refreshed my UA-cam subscriptions this came up. Thanks for such great content and all the hard work you do to help everyone ❤️- Kira

  • @ACarole
    @ACarole 10 місяців тому +4

    My parents were both Boomer babies of large families, and both came to the marriage being spoiled. Then they spoiled each other. Mom would say their budgeting ethos was "Pay the bills and spend what's left." So I didn't have a good role model there. Then, my adult finances were quite a bit more limited than my parents' were. It's taking us four decades of marriage to get a handle on our finances and it's ROUGH!

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  10 місяців тому +2

      It’s definitely hard to unlearn the habits of our families. Proud of you for taking the steps to figure out what’s best for your finances. It’s something me and my partner had to work on as well and are still learning. financial education is so important and also such a privilege to have nowadays the best we can do is learn and move forward ❤

  • @trtlduv07
    @trtlduv07 10 місяців тому +1

    Great video!💙 I sooo agree with Paige about how something doesn't need to become an issue or an addiction before you want to adjust something- it's SO TRUE! I'm someone who is overall great about financing and budgeting but also has a slight tendency to (still within my tight budget but still...) to shop to manage stress,/impulse shop, etc. It's something I've been working on for a while because I just want to be more mindful of it in general and especailly considering my life goals (down payment in a few years and new use car in a few years)! Thanks again for the video! 💙

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  10 місяців тому +1

      Paige is a wealth of knowledge and I’m so glad you enjoyed the content make sure to checkout her podcast she has so much content available to binge.

    • @trtlduv07
      @trtlduv07 10 місяців тому

      Absolutely and awesome I will, thank you!! @@cafewithmonica

  • @RealwithGod510
    @RealwithGod510 7 місяців тому

    I absolutely love this speaker..she is on point from every angle

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  7 місяців тому

      She’s amazing and has a podcast and channel so definitely check out more of Her content ❤️🫶

  • @niemodna
    @niemodna 10 місяців тому +10

    The pause between seing, wanting and purchasing won‘t do, unfortunately. If it‘s a real addiction it won‘t do. I‘ve been on a no buy year since may 2023 now, and I still shop - without buying. I spend lots of time searching for things, adding it to my list and then - thinking about them (and every day new ones) for weeks even. It‘s taking up much energy, time and thoughts still. The only thing that will help, would be faceing the biggest fear/problem (whatever that might be for somebody) and overcome/solve it. Because shopping and window shopping are only substitutes, they are distractions. It‘s a system you build up not to think about that one difficult thing, that makes you anxious.

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  10 місяців тому +2

      Totally agree with you that once it becomes a compulsion distractions won’t help they are simply distractions.There are people who may benefit more from resolving the core conflict working with a therapist who specializes in ocd or addictions sometimes that isn’t always accessible so my hope is this tips provided by Paige may help some but of course it’s not always a solution for everyone. I’m gonna try to find someone who may be able to speak more on the psychological/thought patterns of shopping addictions.

  • @marainaweyl7384
    @marainaweyl7384 6 місяців тому +2

    society doesn't see shopping addiction as a problem because shopping addicts are the best consumers! it benefits the economy and credit card companies to let people continue having these behaviors.

  • @meropale
    @meropale 9 місяців тому +5

    I hope to overcome my spending addiction and *then* win the lottery.

  • @AshleySpeaks4U
    @AshleySpeaks4U 9 місяців тому +3

    GET AND KEEP RECIEPTS. IF I impulse buy, I RETURN things. BUY WITH INTENT. What do you NEED? What kind of LOOK are you going for? What COLORS have you chosen? GO into a store for a SPECIFIC thing, AND DO NOT BUY ANYTHING ELSE. 😂 Try to AVOID shopping online as much as possible. Those are my tips for you all. Hope it helps. ❤

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  9 місяців тому

      Thanks these are some great reflection questions to use to help people pause before purchasing 👏🏻

  • @Ixoracraft
    @Ixoracraft 5 місяців тому

    This is very good and helpful. Pls make more video on impulse shopping and spending. Thank you so much, love from Indonesia

  • @LauraPerez-vy9vl
    @LauraPerez-vy9vl 10 місяців тому +1

    I’m glad I watched this 🙏🏻

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  10 місяців тому

      I'M so happy you watched this! I hope you left with a couple of helpful takeaways. Feel free to share if you feel called to!

  • @colleenalverson8300
    @colleenalverson8300 8 місяців тому +2

    I love the idea of waiting at least 72 hours to buy something. I used to follow the 24 hour rule which wasn't helpful

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  8 місяців тому

      It was such great advice and I feel 72 hours is just enough to really take time to reflect on the purchase.

  • @minimel_vantastic_travel
    @minimel_vantastic_travel 6 місяців тому

    Omg I listen to this podcast and while listening I’m going to my eBay list and click buy for all the things that is sitting in my cart! What is this?! It’s not working 😅

  • @Veromoi4
    @Veromoi4 4 місяці тому

    This was so helpful 🙌🏻🙏

  • @supriyarm
    @supriyarm 10 місяців тому

    Very informative conversation ❤

  • @ashleytattt
    @ashleytattt 9 місяців тому +2

    My husband thinks all his nike shoes, sports cards, and hot-wheels cars are investments. 😅

  • @yeet5148
    @yeet5148 10 місяців тому

    Great video!

  • @PenniesNotPerfection
    @PenniesNotPerfection Рік тому

    Great video!!

  • @AshleySpeaks4U
    @AshleySpeaks4U 9 місяців тому +1

    GET AND KEEP RECIEPTS. IF I impulse buy, I RETURN things. BUY WITH INTENT. What do you NEED? What kind of LOOK are you going for? What COLORS have you chosen? GO into a store for a SPECIFIC thing, AND DO NOT BUY ANYTHING ELSE. 😂

  • @jessnoske3020
    @jessnoske3020 8 місяців тому +1

    Haha, jokes on me; unmedicated ADHD means I knew better but did stupid stuff anyway 😅

  • @KanishQQuotes
    @KanishQQuotes Місяць тому

    Stop making declarations about yourself "oh I'm a shopaholic" , "shopping makes me feel good "
    I hate this trend of people making such statements and then follow it with putting the effort to don't know please who

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  Місяць тому

      I think I’m understanding but yes sometimes I feel we can enable our behavior when it comes to shopping by identifying with those statement it gives them more power to drive our behavior.

  • @vanessasmith6925
    @vanessasmith6925 9 місяців тому +1

    Omg I Got goosebumps when she Said the issue is Being someone who has money 🫣 am I actually scared of money?? So I try to get rid of it 😂

    • @cafewithmonica
      @cafewithmonica  9 місяців тому +2

      so many good takeaways from this episode!