For me it would be a dealbreaker if I dated someone and found out they weren't taking their responsibilities to their kids seriously. This guy and his ex have the sort of relationship every child deserves, but too few ever have.
@@kerryalbany3922 You will not believe the amount of people who have a problem with their partner being a great parent and are jealous of their ex partner.
@@amoyhongping1987 I'm sorry, but those are the type of people who need some serious help. Seriously, what goes through these people's heads to think that? ಠ︵ಠ
I agree with you! I once went out with a man who smirked about hiding his income and assets from his ex, and making her pay for all the "extras" for his kids. I ditched that guy at once!
Story one: this dad is incredible, it does not sound like he does anything unreasonable. He helps out when needed and it’s not like she’s asking for the money, she mentions things or their son mentions things and he helps out. Also, his gf is his gf, she has zero say in his finances until they get married and even then it’s his son and he will always be a priority. Seems like he just wants his son to have the best life that he can give him. Keep up the good work.
yeah, many single parents wish their exes were this great at co-parenting. so many just put in minimal effort and pay the bare minimum required of them and here OP is doing everything he can to make sure his son is happy and healthy.
Story one : "Not her money, not her business, not her kid". Plus OP is comfortable giving this money and the mother seem responsible and do not seem to abuse of OP's kindness so the gf should back off.
But on the other hand his GF has a point as well. Because in at least my country the child support has been taking in to account everything, like needing new feuniture, sport activity and all other things counting to have a child. Including how much the other parents earning that haven't the child so the child support should be enough for everything when you include the child support and earnings from the mother. Either the mom are bad with money and are using OP (we don't know the situation at all between OP and the mother) or OP wants to have a open door and get back to the mother in the future.
@@Daarkdevil93 Or her job just doesnt pay that well. Some jobs can be absolute gold mine but long work hours, while others are crap pay with not so long hours. She would need a sitter for when she goes to work; family, friends, hired sitters, paying them to watch her child while she works. She kept receipts of everything she used the money for to show her commitment and trust that she IS using it for their child. Plus lets not forget, she probably lives alone with their son so that means rent/mortgage, bills, food on the table, clothes, toys, medical bills etc. So mostly she is probably penny pinching and trying to provide for their child over her own needs and using op money as it was intended. Gf was mostly jealous of the money provided that she didnt see the son as the target of her jealousy but the mother. They never met, spoke, interacted, etc, so obviously she held some sort of jealousy towards her. In her eyes, shes an ex whos using op money for herself and luxuries and trying to get back with him.Far from the truth. If op did love her romanticcally, he would have moved her and his son into his home right? All in all, gf's jealousy caused the downfall in their relationship trying to dictate his money and putting words into his mouth.
@@Daarkdevil93Expect... it's not unless you know how much every thing costs. Rent, food, clothes, are the main thing a child needs and depending on the amount that can eat up child support, also add in insurance. And some extra things a child needs. Those within a month can add up quickly. It a bit bold to say shes either irresponsible or that OP's trying to keep one foot in the door. When the text itself doesn't imply it with the info we have. And the asking for money as op says isn't constant, so Baby mama occasionally asks for more money for their shared son to do extra things / get a new mattress. That should be normal. Op isn't going beyond, he's just being a good dad , giving more when child support isn't enough sometimes.
@@Daarkdevil93 the GF then should not be dating man with kid. never made an excused for a bad behaviour. this is his child's need that we speak about. your opinion just based on the thing that you think the his child'smom might did. if you even listened to the story very cleary, the mother of the child GIVE OP the prove of what she is purchasing. IF OP saw the cosmetic in the lists, OP might not be as gracious w/his money to his child'smom. you just want to make an excused for the Gold diging GF who whining about hw OP's money nont sped on her but to his child. get lost! you as$
OP is being a good dad and even though he and his ex aren't together anymore, they are still trying to make it work for their son. As an ex-husband who had a far more rocky relationship with my ex I applaud this man. Anna overstepped big time here especially since their finances are separate and he more than likely is able to take care of his own bills without her effort. It's not her place to tell him what he does with his disposable income.
A parent struggling financially effects the child. It may also cause resentment as the child gets older to realise one parent could have helped but didn't.
I agree with you. As long as he's being a good parent, OP should be allowed to do whatever he wants with his hard earned money. I'm glad he got rid of Anna.
I got the idea that Anna was ready to cut off OPs kid down to the bare minimum, if not entirely. So many red flags: snooping, repeatedly harping even when a logical answer is given, jealous, greedy. Whatever this broad was going to give to the relationship, she was gonna take twice as much (or more).
He needs to tell his girlfriend to mind her own damn business. Dump her now because she will only get more controlling as she gets her claws in deeper.
And a nosy parker! My partner and I have been together over thirty years and we don't go into each other's phones, diaries or wallets(handbag!).What a nerve she had.
@@carolroberts4614 Same. Just because the ledger was out in the open didn't make it her business. OP was right in she was upset the extra money he sent to ex could have been spent on her. Glad he got out.
@@maishal7034 I know right? The little boy isn't hers. OP is definitely being a good dad. And Carrie is being a good mom. Just because their own relationship didn't work out doesn't mean that they should hate each other. Exes can still be friends as long as no boundaries are crossed and it doesn't turn into one of those melodramatic relationships.
I know this post is a year old but I am glad to see a comment like this. I was told I was in love with my ex who I have a daughter with. No, WE didn't work, that has absolutely NOTHING to do with our daughter. Holiday's I spent with his family. He was in a long term relationship before I was but I really liked her! She loves my daughter and I was the happiest! When I met my husband we would double date, play pool.. My husband had no children but he was the first man that understood while I was literally hit by an ex.. There is nothing wrong with having a great coparenting relationship.. It's been almost a decade married and sadly my ex's wife passed away. It hurts like she was my sister you know? I say a prayer and thank her for helping us raise an amazing woman that my child is today.. I think our kids turned out like she did BECAUSE we had my ex's wife in her life...
I think I've dated/married 3 people with children and the child always comes first - not only to the mother but also to me. My ex (also ex-mormon) had 6 kids all over 18 so no "dad" role there as such but whenever they needed somewhere to stay, they were always welcome, rent and board free as long as they liked. My current GF's son was 7 when we started dating and we always had our own relationship - I referred to him as "my client" when he was in trouble and he'd keep me on retainer with M&Ms.
OMG ROTFL I love it. I'm crying I'm laughing so hard. M&Ms lol WAIT! Plain or peanuts? This is important info, it makes all the difference in if you should take on other clients. 🧐
Glad he dumped the girlfriend! Had to laugh when he said his son bought him a wand too. Think they make great co-parents! She's definitely not taking advantage of him 😂
Me too. A petty part of me wants them to get back together to rub it in Anna's face, but it would only confirm what she believed all along. But in any case, OP and Carrie are indeed great and friendly co-parents! 💕
Story1: Oh hell no. Where does this Anna get off, thinking she can invade OP's privacy and demand explanations? How he spends his money is none of her damn business! Glad he didn't fall for her insipid water-works act and dumped her. Definitely a happy ending, that her true colours were revealed before she moved in.
Story 1: Wow. Just wow. OP is awesome. He's an amazing dad and a stand up co-parent. There are men who quit working to avoid paying child support, and this man is out here handling his business, behaving like a mature adult, and looking beyond his child's most basic needs while stepping up. He sounds considerate, and his son & Carrie are lucky to have him in their lives.
My ex and I had children together. I was hospitalised with double pneumonia and asked him to take the children for a week (they were both under 4). He told me "no" because it would be helping me out. I had to actually leave the hospital against doctor's advice to care for my children. While I was home I really couldn't do much for them. It would have been better for the children to be with a parent who could actually breathe and get off the couch. He wouldn't take the children for his visitation because it would be giving me "a break". His girlfriend told him he had to choose between his family and her.
Story one : more men need to be like OP . He gets it, it isn't about the parents its about the children and the Primary Caretaker always carries more of the financial load and needs to be healthy to care for their children 🥰🥰🥰
@Goawsy if a man thought the money wasn’t being used for the child or in a way that benefited the child he could take that to court but of course he would have to show proof. Though if this was a game of being resentful he could end up with karma of paying more child support. Given how much it costs to raise a child a lot of men aren’t even covering half the expenses (you can tell it’s almost always the men who think child support will cover food, clothes, medical bills etc without pitching in outside of that and are often working a lower end job).
@@itazuranakisu when most women use Child Support to buy new shoes/clothes and accessories for themselves, then how dafruck is it "benefitting the child"??????? Also, when the roles are reversed, most women don't want to pay Child Support.......... But, you are right that being resentful and going to court (to reduce Child Support) will hit you with Karma...........
@@itazuranakisu yeah that's a no win situation I've seen happen. The guys can't protect themselves legally without seeming like a jerk in the situation your speaking of. I made quite a bit more than my ex so child support (when he got it) went to class trips, allowance and extracurricular activities for my boy and he was told his father paid for it. I thought it was only fair he knew this. He got gifts from mom and gifts from his father. But the guys who are being taken advantage of, it's no way for them to win smh. It's unfair and that's coming from a female that ended spring her son alone. After a few years my ex just disappeared and guys like THAT make it hard for the ones trying to do what they need to for their kids. It makes me sad.
Only 2 minutes in and the gf pissed me off lol. This is a dad providing for HIS CHILD. Seriously. It makes me happy to see two parents act like parents even if they aren't together anymore, they're putting their kid first and that's what's important. I hope he leaves the gf. She's going to cause some MAJOR issues if he stays with her Edit: I'm glad he left her. She's definitely not worth the drama she would have caused
Great job Dad for being a decent human to your ex partner and your son. As for this female aka Anna. You need to step away and recognize WHO she is showing who she is. BELIEVE that. She is going to forever have an issue with Carrie and your son.
First story warmed my heart, that is an awesome dad who loves his child and is able to get along with the mother of his child even though they aren’t dating
NGL, I first read the thumbnail as “My girlfriend saw my fiancé” and I was like, yeah, that’s a problem, but then I reread it. Much less dramatic than when I first read the thumbnail.
Story 1: People need to be honest with themselves about their partner's children and how it may affect their relationship. If you know you can't deal with them always putting their child before you and having to have "forever ties" to their ex dont get with them. Personally i would never get with someone who has kids because to me it's an unnecessary baggage. I dont want to deal with that dynamic and i make sure to put that on the table before we go anywhere. Honesty, even if it's kinda mean sometimes is way better than lying and going through all these problems.
It's good that a person knows what will or won't work for them in a relationship. All things considered, you seem to be a realist about your feelings, and that makes for better choices for you. Good on you!
1st story: the ex we all want, but only a few get….. he is a fantastic father and understanding ex. My ex-husband HAS the money, but does not want to part with it…..because he will hear it from his new wife. Kids come first!!! I receive NO child support and she is with me full time now. The court will see about that soon…..
It's vital when co-parenting to keep things positive. I would imagine Carrie appreciates the extra help, and their son benefits from both parents being happy with the situation. Aside from Anna prioritizing herself and potentially her own kids being an issue, how Carrie feels is important. Because if she starts feeling the son is being neglected by Anna, she'd be well within her rights to go to court and try to get custody changed. Not because OP was a bad parent, but because he was living with one.
1. She is sick of knowing his son is going to come before her. She isn't the right partner for a parent. It does sound like he puts a lot of money into supporting his ex and if they got together, playing second fiddle to the ex every time she wants something would be harmful. It isn't girlfriend's business yet, but it should be part of the moving in together discussion where a serious relationship discussion had to be involved. It just showed a massive incompatibility in the relationship and no point in wasting longer with someone that doesn't get that the parent role doesn't end when the son isn't present. The son would be seen as a distraction from her, and that will be an abusive environment. He will have trouble finding women the won't be leery of his eagerness to give his ex money all the time. It's reasonable to not trust it completely right off, but after 9 months she should have had a clue. 2. Bet family get togethers are a blast with those couples around.... 3. Wow first red flag: "You are expected to cheat on me, and I fully intend to sleep with your best friend since he wants me. I'm also going to greatly enjoy rubbing how much your friend wants me frequently." Dude should have left her where he found her. She's a shit partner.
Self-fulfilling prophecy, honestly. She kept telling him that he'll cheat on her and he definitely fulfilled that expectation very well. Toxic relationship all around.
I'm not even through the first part, and I can already tell Anna is not worth endangering the solid, mature co-parenting relationship he has with his ex. They sound like they have been able to do what is best for their son even though it didn't work out for them. Anyone who doesn't value that shouldn't be in OP's life
Any reasonable person would be happy that a parent is doing their job and providing for their child with joy. From my experience, anybody who makes a stink about a person giving money for their child's upkeep is bad news and will most likely with time try to drive a wedge between her partner and stepchild smh. A smart woman would value a man like that.
I told my partner from the beginning of the relationship that if he ever cheated one me, I would sleep with his best friend." - She was threatening the guy the whole time and somehow is surprised that he cheated on her? That is abuse for crying out loud, not like that makes the cheating any better but she is a horrible human being herself so she doesn't really get to complain.
Last Story: tbh I don't understand why the guy did even stay with her after her threat, yes he is an asshole for cheating, but I wouldn't want to be with someone as toxic as her in the end I must say they did deserve each other^^
The thing is he was cheating from the begining of their relationship, so I'm not sure why he didn't leave when he heard her threat the first time, I'm sure he wasn't surprised when it happend.
@@emilyrosebery1848 yep, he cheated from the beginning and she threatened him and tbh if both are like that why are they even in a relationship Why cheat at all and why cheat st the beginning when you are supposed to be all lovy dovy? And while trust needs to be build and he was certainly unworthy of trust in the end, at the beginning of a relationship you need to show trust even though the other person did not have the chance to proof themself worthy of it, but her instantly threatening him is the opposite
@@Bleg94 maybe I wasn't fully paying attention but I don't think she was _instantly_ threatening him, I think it only really started coming up when he started acting shady as hell, only to get even more shady after she'd say it. Once you cheat your relationship is essentially over and it's only a matter of time before you get caught. She warned him and he fucked around and found out 🤷🏻♂️
@@owl7072 "I told my partner from the beginning of the relationship that if he ever cheated on me, I would sleep with his best friend." Boyfriend is an asshole for cheating, but can't say OP is blameless either. Self-fulfilling prophecy is a thing.
I’m not done listening to story 1, but if I was dating that guy, I’d push to marry him, not complain. That would be sexy as shit to me that he’s always providing for his son.
I hope to be that good as a dad when i have kids ,and i Don't understand Anna at all, i mean, it should be a good sign for a person that their SO take good care of their Kids with the ex because it would mean he/she is a responsible and caring person.
Story 1: The girlfriend can't stand coming second or being equal to anyone even a child. Also girlfriend, not fiance or wife. "How dare you do something nice for your son who sounds like a good kid." What? I'm surpised people still use checks, money direct into the account is more typical but if it works, cool.
Girlfriend Anna: "There is no excuse for giving her that much money on top of child support!" Bad news, kiddo. He doesn't need an excuse. He's done nothing wrong. It's not your money, not on the front end (came from his account) nor on the back end (you're not one of his dependents). Dude needs to ditch Anna, like live your life like she never existed kind of ditching her.
The first story…OP is the definition of a good man and Dad! His gf “Anna” can be shown the door because she is wrong asf! (And so glad he did break up with her) I would be proud of a man if that was my BF bc it shows a lot about his character and if I had his children, what kind of Dad he is. As long as he isn’t ruining their future (him and Anna’s) as a commenter said…then let that man take care of his child. As a single mom who struggled, that would have been appreciated having breathing room. I was listening to this story the whole time like this 😲😒😲😒 Second story…😂😂😂😂 they should have taken the offer for their hoarded house offered the first time! I would have loved to been a fly on the wall to see the hoarders faces 🤣 Third story 🤦🏾♀️🤣🤦🏾♀️🤣🤦🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️ jeez Thanks LG! ❤️🥰
What is it with partners telling men not to cover their child’s finances like what? He can afford and WANTS to give his son the best he can have. Update I’m glad OP decided to break up with his immature ex. It was so cute to read that his son bought his dad a souvenir from HP world.
Something similar happened with one of my cousins. Saying that she needs to stop wasting money on her daughter and more on him. Why do people hook up with single parents then get mad when said parent prioritize the kid over them?
@@chetarisin3035 This has nothing to do with women. Plenty of men are happy to do the bare minimum when it comes to financially supporting their child. We’ve seen that in plenty of reddit stories and we’ve seen plenty of men complain about having to pay child support. Do you blame men, whenever mom’s prioritize their boyfriends over their children? If a man can be swayed to mistreat their child due to partner, then he’s a bad parent and that’s solely on him.
Story 1: I'd think long and hard before getting any further involved with this woman. She invaded OP's privacy by snooping in his financial records. She's obviously jealous of the mother of OP's child and by extension, jealous of the child. This situation will only get worse if they move in together or marry. This is not the kind of woman OP wants as a stepmother to his little son.
It’s like “Anna” doesn’t understand how expensive theme parks actually are! Souveniers are expensive! I’m so proud of OP for doing these things! (I hope he saves enough to do things in teen years too)
Anna has a lot of nerve going through someone's financial records. She overstepped many boundaries, is insecure and immature. He's being a good dad, and I'm glad he saw the situation realistically and told her to go pound sand. Why is he using cheques? Just do an e transfer; quick, done and he enters it into his ledger. He needs to get with the times. LOL
Depends on the court system actually.. The reason is the courts would have to pay every credit card company for every transaction so courts are usually cash, check, money order and do NOT take credit or debit.. That's why.. Hehe
@@hilaryc3203 No no hon, read what I said again.. You stated, "Why is he using e- checks...." my comment was letting you know WHY he's using them.. Just throwing this in, the way you spell "CHECKS" are you not from the US? I have never seen that spelling before and it made me giggle, I like it.. Lol... But, in the US, as I explained, that is how Child Support is given out, check, cash or money order.. E-check is NOT PROOF There is NO paying child support online or extra money.. I also explained WHY as well. Credit card companies would have to be paid if the use of credit or debit cards were used... So I'm telling you why he didn't use E-CHECK, it's not proof just incase.. Courts can be RIDICULOUS to men.. He's just using this was to cover his ass is all.. I hope that makes sense...
Story 1 Single Mom of 4, 2 different sperm donors. (No offense to fathers who are present and available in their kids' lives) I basically raised my children with zero to very little input from either man, even while I was still together (married) to the 2nd man. OP, you sir are an amazing man and a super amazing father!!! A parent's responsibility does not stop at "I paid my child support already" though most leave it like it does cover their responsibility for their children. Reasons you have done nothing wrong: 1) Anna is a little too immature to realize how difficult parenting really is 2) She had zero right to look through your ledger, and even if it was a mistaken glance, she had zero right to say anything. She is jealous. 3) Helping Carrie with something that you know would make it more difficult for Carry to make ends meet if she paid is being conscience of just how much she puts into parenting and the differences in your finances 4) Even IF Carrie needed help purchasing certain types of clothing for her job and you paid for a week's worth of clothing, when she only asked for a "loan" until next paycheck so she could get certain type of pants is still absolutely within the scope of caring for your son, because without the help she may not have been able to take said job. Also, OP if you haven't done so already and you do not want more children, have the surgery and make sure you do the year follow-up to have best chance of it completely severing and tying off the pathway. IT is reversable if you do decide to father another child in the future, this way you are unlikely to father another unless you decide to do so. It is also no different than a woman getting her tubes tied, except hers is much more difficult to undo, and more invasive of a procedure as to having to travel into the body compared to a male procedure, so if you're Squamish about it don't be.
I know someone like Anna. She is from very wealthy family, but her parents were usually very busy with their careers. So, eventually, they showered their daughter with money as their gesture of love. In the end, money is always associated with love to the daughter. Every present became money or giftcard. Otherwise, she would be moody for weeks. Recently, she went to see therapy for that, and she is getting better. Still, she often sees monetary value over thoughts whenever gifts were given. She is not a bad person, and in fact very generous but just different when it comes to love and affection I guess.
I’ve known people of divorced parents where the one paying child support would give money and gifts directly to the child instead of the other parent. It’s an underhanded way of buying the kid’s favor while simultaneously shooting a middle finger to the ex, and when they grow up they go from liking the payer parent to resenting them for their pettiness. That would’ve been the kind of relationship OP would have with his son if he did what Anna wanted
1. You are a good dad. You and Carrie may not be husband and wife, but you share a relationship and a child. You are taking care of your people. It would be different if you were poor and Carrie was overly greedy. A girlfriend may have the right to gently question and seek out your opinion, just because she needs to know you, to see if it's a sustainable relationship, but she has no right to criticize or demand anything. I also find it odd she is reading your statements. Snoop
My old boyfriend had 2 kids from a previous marriage. We lived together for 5 years. It was understood from the get-go that if he wanted to give his ex money for his kids above and beyond what he already paid in child support that that is what he would do. I never had a problem with it and, in fact, encouraged it. I can't understand why anyone would have a problem with someone giving their child money. It's not anyone else's business. OP needs to cut her loose.
9 months? That's ridiculous. OP sounds like a great Dad and takes his responsibility seriously. Good on you for stepping up and dumping the entitled brat. Anna sounds like a gold digger. Anne needs to stay in her lane.
Story 1. I'm thinking that if, after 9 months, you still hadn't introduced your son to new exGF then you already felt something wrong deep in the back of your mind. Had you introduced them at maybe 6 months, you would've known to split sooner or they could've started to build a bond of sorts & maybe her reaction might have been different but I think it's more she's insecure/jealous of your sons mum
OP's GF is out of line. GF is Jealous of a 5 y/o. You're doing a good job setting aside your differences with your ex and doing good by your son. Get rid of the GF - she's picking fights ith a child.
I don't know the circumstances of OP's breakup with Carrie, but if there were no major issues like cheating, I'd dump Anna and try to get back with her. OP and Carrie seem like decent people, whereas Anna obviously will never adapt to his relationship with his child and the child's mother. It's possible OP and Carrie have matured and are ready for a long term relationship. In the end, OP and Anna broke up, but if he was going to stay with someone like Anna (why?) condoms, condoms, condoms, all the time. Even better: a vasectomy, if you don't want more kids.
Maybe it's because I have kids, maybe it's just a sense of common decency, but I cannot IMAGINE not helping my husband take care of my kids if we split and it was needed and I had the ability. Or even just doing the occasional nice thing for them if I couldn't take one of my weekends with them. Like WTF. I know my ass would leave a partner for not treating their kid and the ex that had the kids with as much kindness and respect as possible.
I don't like to be the one to tell OP's to run...but OP needs to run. He's an amazing dad and has an amazing co-parent relationship with his Ex. Sometimes that's worth more than all the Anna's in the world.
Man,the ex gf is very unreasonable. She expecting OP would prioritize her more than his son ? Why is she dating a divorce man in the first place if she can't accept OP situation ? Smh.
@@hi_stranger9156 Agreed. I also don't think she was just inexperienced with dating a man with children. I think she's spoiled rotten and just wanted someone to continue to spoil her. Any adult that gets jealous of a child and wants to take things from them to make themselves happy is a butthole.
First Story: How much extra did OP give the ex for food? How many days were they going to be there? Years, and I mean years ago I bought one hot dog, small fries, and small drink at Disneyland and was out $20. I can see eating in the park might cost a pretty penny for two meals for a couple of days. Having breakfast there too and wow, those receipts might cause a heart attack. We haven't even covered mementos for mom and son, or getting a nice gift to bring back to dad. It's almost a requirement that you go in bareheaded and buy a hat to wear while there.
"How dare you to pay for your kids to have a good life, I demand you use all your money on me and my kids !!!". Dump her and save the convo, such horrible women are quite capable of ruin your life when find that cant get their way.
Anna had no buisness looking into his account ledger or even commenting on the money OP spends on his son. OP is an awesome father co-parenting for his son!
That's the mother of his child, and he can give as much as he deems appropriate. Carrie's raising his son and he's being a supportive co-parent. Anna is acting like a child
I think carrying of the cold shoulder be 50/50 and any stuff for kid expenses should be split that way. Gf insecure because he gave money not only in trip for kid but also paid for his ex. But kid is not able to go somewhere by himself after all . Some ppl shouldn't date parents because not everyone can handle ex in their life being seen as a priority.
You're a great dad. Your child's mom is a gem. Anna needs to park it, and she is dancing out the door. Don't, do not let Anna be a part of your son's life, he will be here, asking if I should reconcile with my dad, after he allowed my stepmom, ruin my life.
Support your child as you should, but keep strict boundaries with your childs mother as strictly co-parenting. OP is not missing out on much in that relationship if she can't understand that kids are priority.
Story 1: "Obviously I'm not making it out to my son because he's 5 and doesn't have a bank account" this was funny to me idk why Edit: I'm not one to insult people often but like..... Anna is so dumb I'm sorry. "If it was _really_ for your son then why does it say it's for Carrie???" Because as Op said, he's 5 and doesn't have a bank account. What's she expecting, a 5 year old to receive a check and not only know what it is, but to also just go "Ah yes, why thank you father, this money will be well spent on the Harry Potter world trip that I begged mother dearest to take me on. Yes yes, this will do quite nicely. I shall store it away in my private bank account that us young children have."
1) He is amazing for doing what he does, especially paying her hospital bills because he understands she needs to be healthy because she takes care of their child. His girlfriend doesn't get a say, she's not his wife, she's not making the money that he's using, that is a huge red flag for her to overreact like that and that would probably be enough for me to say I don't really think I want to continue this relationship. Edit: Carrie sounds like an awesome mom. And if he ever loved her of course he's always going to even if it's not the same, that's a mother of his child there will always be a spot in his heart for her because of what she does for their son alone. Anna sounds selfish and like she wants the money to go to her instead, I'm 100% confident that she wouldn't say no if he gave her all that money instead. Carrie is an awesome mom, she's understanding and cares for their child with so much love. It's a shame (as far as where I am in the story) that they couldn't make it work out, but I'm glad that for their son they're doing good :) Alsoooo: Even if he does stay with this girl I would change all of my bank documents and hide other private information especially of my sons. And because I know True Crime and read it so well I would even be prepared for a lawyer because there's a chance she might try and discredit Carrie and have her son taken away from her and try and be new mommy. I would also pay for not only your house but for Carrie as well to have cameras with night vision and audio throughout main portions of the house and maybe even bedrooms so if anything happens there's proof. I would also stop all sex with Anna, if she sees the end near or just wants to try and get control she may suddenly become pregnant and I think we all know she won't be a good mom like Carrie
For me it would be a dealbreaker if I dated someone and found out they weren't taking their responsibilities to their kids seriously. This guy and his ex have the sort of relationship every child deserves, but too few ever have.
Yeah, imagine complaining that your partner is too good of a father
@@kerryalbany3922 You will not believe the amount of people who have a problem with their partner being a great parent and are jealous of their ex partner.
@@amoyhongping1987 I'm sorry, but those are the type of people who need some serious help. Seriously, what goes through these people's heads to think that? ಠ︵ಠ
I agree with you! I once went out with a man who smirked about hiding his income and assets from his ex, and making her pay for all the "extras" for his kids. I ditched that guy at once!
Story one: this dad is incredible, it does not sound like he does anything unreasonable. He helps out when needed and it’s not like she’s asking for the money, she mentions things or their son mentions things and he helps out. Also, his gf is his gf, she has zero say in his finances until they get married and even then it’s his son and he will always be a priority. Seems like he just wants his son to have the best life that he can give him. Keep up the good work.
Ok this is a dad of the year canadite.
Men who pay child support and are willingly co-parenting are to be treasured. Kudos to OP !
Men who pay child support and are willingly co-parenting are to be treasured. Kudos to OP !
yeah, many single parents wish their exes were this great at co-parenting. so many just put in minimal effort and pay the bare minimum required of them and here OP is doing everything he can to make sure his son is happy and healthy.
As someone whose child's father only contribution into its life was genetic material, this dad is doing an awesome job. Kudos to him and the mama.
Story one : "Not her money, not her business, not her kid". Plus OP is comfortable giving this money and the mother seem responsible and do not seem to abuse of OP's kindness so the gf should back off.
OP is setting a good example of parenthood that his son can see. OP seems mature while his girlfriend isn't
But on the other hand his GF has a point as well. Because in at least my country the child support has been taking in to account everything, like needing new feuniture, sport activity and all other things counting to have a child. Including how much the other parents earning that haven't the child so the child support should be enough for everything when you include the child support and earnings from the mother.
Either the mom are bad with money and are using OP (we don't know the situation at all between OP and the mother) or OP wants to have a open door and get back to the mother in the future.
@@Daarkdevil93 Or her job just doesnt pay that well. Some jobs can be absolute gold mine but long work hours, while others are crap pay with not so long hours. She would need a sitter for when she goes to work; family, friends, hired sitters, paying them to watch her child while she works. She kept receipts of everything she used the money for to show her commitment and trust that she IS using it for their child.
Plus lets not forget, she probably lives alone with their son so that means rent/mortgage, bills, food on the table, clothes, toys, medical bills etc. So mostly she is probably penny pinching and trying to provide for their child over her own needs and using op money as it was intended.
Gf was mostly jealous of the money provided that she didnt see the son as the target of her jealousy but the mother. They never met, spoke, interacted, etc, so obviously she held some sort of jealousy towards her. In her eyes, shes an ex whos using op money for herself and luxuries and trying to get back with him.Far from the truth. If op did love her romanticcally, he would have moved her and his son into his home right?
All in all, gf's jealousy caused the downfall in their relationship trying to dictate his money and putting words into his mouth.
@@Daarkdevil93Expect... it's not unless you know how much every thing costs. Rent, food, clothes, are the main thing a child needs and depending on the amount that can eat up child support, also add in insurance. And some extra things a child needs. Those within a month can add up quickly.
It a bit bold to say shes either irresponsible or that OP's trying to keep one foot in the door. When the text itself doesn't imply it with the info we have.
And the asking for money as op says isn't constant, so Baby mama occasionally asks for more money for their shared son to do extra things / get a new mattress. That should be normal. Op isn't going beyond, he's just being a good dad , giving more when child support isn't enough sometimes.
@@Daarkdevil93 the GF then should not be dating man with kid. never made an excused for a bad behaviour. this is his child's need that we speak about. your opinion just based on the thing that you think the his child'smom might did. if you even listened to the story very cleary, the mother of the child GIVE OP the prove of what she is purchasing. IF OP saw the cosmetic in the lists, OP might not be as gracious w/his money to his child'smom. you just want to make an excused for the Gold diging GF who whining about hw OP's money nont sped on her but to his child. get lost! you as$
OP is being a good dad and even though he and his ex aren't together anymore, they are still trying to make it work for their son. As an ex-husband who had a far more rocky relationship with my ex I applaud this man. Anna overstepped big time here especially since their finances are separate and he more than likely is able to take care of his own bills without her effort. It's not her place to tell him what he does with his disposable income.
A parent struggling financially effects the child. It may also cause resentment as the child gets older to realise one parent could have helped but didn't.
She can STFU and mind her own business!
I agree with you. As long as he's being a good parent, OP should be allowed to do whatever he wants with his hard earned money. I'm glad he got rid of Anna.
I got the idea that Anna was ready to cut off OPs kid down to the bare minimum, if not entirely. So many red flags: snooping, repeatedly harping even when a logical answer is given, jealous, greedy. Whatever this broad was going to give to the relationship, she was gonna take twice as much (or more).
@@user-wr3vt8uq4s pretty sure anna has borderline personality disorder. Which is why she wasn't able to be reasoned with.
He needs to tell his girlfriend to mind her own damn business. Dump her now because she will only get more controlling as she gets her claws in deeper.
Hear, hear! Exactly what I was going to say
Anna's a gold digger
And a nosy parker! My partner and I have been together over thirty years and we don't go into each other's phones, diaries or wallets(handbag!).What a nerve she had.
@@carolroberts4614 Same. Just because the ledger was out in the open didn't make it her business. OP was right in she was upset the extra money he sent to ex could have been spent on her. Glad he got out.
@@carissaconway2802 nah, borderline personality disorder more likely.
Wow! In the first story OP dodged a bullet. Can you imagine having to justify to Anna every penny spent on his son for the next 13 years?
What a terrible human, competing with a child.
Anna is a gold digger. Plain and simple.
@@Azulakayes I think she were competing with ex to be honest . Not everyone can handle dating parents
The audacity of Anna, to go through OP's financial records and have the nerve to tell him how much to spend on his kid..........
@@maishal7034 I know right? The little boy isn't hers. OP is definitely being a good dad. And Carrie is being a good mom. Just because their own relationship didn't work out doesn't mean that they should hate each other. Exes can still be friends as long as no boundaries are crossed and it doesn't turn into one of those melodramatic relationships.
It's a breath of fresh air seeing a parent prioritizing their kid over their SO/stepkids
I know this post is a year old but I am glad to see a comment like this. I was told I was in love with my ex who I have a daughter with. No, WE didn't work, that has absolutely NOTHING to do with our daughter. Holiday's I spent with his family. He was in a long term relationship before I was but I really liked her! She loves my daughter and I was the happiest! When I met my husband we would double date, play pool.. My husband had no children but he was the first man that understood while I was literally hit by an ex.. There is nothing wrong with having a great coparenting relationship.. It's been almost a decade married and sadly my ex's wife passed away. It hurts like she was my sister you know? I say a prayer and thank her for helping us raise an amazing woman that my child is today.. I think our kids turned out like she did BECAUSE we had my ex's wife in her life...
I think I've dated/married 3 people with children and the child always comes first - not only to the mother but also to me. My ex (also ex-mormon) had 6 kids all over 18 so no "dad" role there as such but whenever they needed somewhere to stay, they were always welcome, rent and board free as long as they liked. My current GF's son was 7 when we started dating and we always had our own relationship - I referred to him as "my client" when he was in trouble and he'd keep me on retainer with M&Ms.
The last big about him keeping you on retainer with M&M's is so cute! It's wonderful lthat you two can have that kind of relationship
That's so adorable 🤣
OMG ROTFL I love it. I'm crying I'm laughing so hard. M&Ms lol WAIT! Plain or peanuts? This is important info, it makes all the difference in if you should take on other clients. 🧐
@@rae197595 😂🤣😂💀💀 I hope it peanuts. Or maybe peanut butter? How about the brownies?
M&M's sounds like a great retainer!
Glad he dumped the girlfriend! Had to laugh when he said his son bought him a wand too. Think they make great co-parents! She's definitely not taking advantage of him 😂
Me too. A petty part of me wants them to get back together to rub it in Anna's face, but it would only confirm what she believed all along. But in any case, OP and Carrie are indeed great and friendly co-parents! 💕
Great story (#1)! Glad OP has his priorities straight. Anna's immaturity leads to her own loss. Liked the house story, too!
OP already has one child he's raising. He doesn't need another!
@@DrownedInExile exactly! You can tell that anna doesn't have any kids.
Story1: Oh hell no. Where does this Anna get off, thinking she can invade OP's privacy and demand explanations? How he spends his money is none of her damn business! Glad he didn't fall for her insipid water-works act and dumped her. Definitely a happy ending, that her true colours were revealed before she moved in.
Story 1: I ain't saying she's a gold digger...
Also taking a kid to a theme park isn't exactly a treat for Carrie
Story 1: Wow. Just wow. OP is awesome. He's an amazing dad and a stand up co-parent.
There are men who quit working to avoid paying child support, and this man is out here handling his business, behaving like a mature adult, and looking beyond his child's most basic needs while stepping up. He sounds considerate, and his son & Carrie are lucky to have him in their lives.
My ex and I had children together. I was hospitalised with double pneumonia and asked him to take the children for a week (they were both under 4). He told me "no" because it would be helping me out. I had to actually leave the hospital against doctor's advice to care for my children. While I was home I really couldn't do much for them. It would have been better for the children to be with a parent who could actually breathe and get off the couch. He wouldn't take the children for his visitation because it would be giving me "a break". His girlfriend told him he had to choose between his family and her.
Wow. That is sad.
Your ex is an AH! I am sorry that he doesn't see his blood/children as important. X
Story one : more men need to be like OP . He gets it, it isn't about the parents its about the children and the Primary Caretaker always carries more of the financial load and needs to be healthy to care for their children 🥰🥰🥰
Similarly more women need to be like Carrie and actually be willing to show receipts... literally.
That is true goes both ways .
@Goawsy if a man thought the money wasn’t being used for the child or in a way that benefited the child he could take that to court but of course he would have to show proof. Though if this was a game of being resentful he could end up with karma of paying more child support. Given how much it costs to raise a child a lot of men aren’t even covering half the expenses (you can tell it’s almost always the men who think child support will cover food, clothes, medical bills etc without pitching in outside of that and are often working a lower end job).
@@itazuranakisu when most women use Child Support to buy new shoes/clothes and accessories for themselves, then how dafruck is it "benefitting the child"???????
Also, when the roles are reversed, most women don't want to pay Child Support..........
But, you are right that being resentful and going to court (to reduce Child Support) will hit you with Karma...........
@@itazuranakisu yeah that's a no win situation I've seen happen. The guys can't protect themselves legally without seeming like a jerk in the situation your speaking of. I made quite a bit more than my ex so child support (when he got it) went to class trips, allowance and extracurricular activities for my boy and he was told his father paid for it. I thought it was only fair he knew this. He got gifts from mom and gifts from his father. But the guys who are being taken advantage of, it's no way for them to win smh. It's unfair and that's coming from a female that ended spring her son alone. After a few years my ex just disappeared and guys like THAT make it hard for the ones trying to do what they need to for their kids. It makes me sad.
Only 2 minutes in and the gf pissed me off lol. This is a dad providing for HIS CHILD. Seriously. It makes me happy to see two parents act like parents even if they aren't together anymore, they're putting their kid first and that's what's important. I hope he leaves the gf. She's going to cause some MAJOR issues if he stays with her
Edit: I'm glad he left her. She's definitely not worth the drama she would have caused
"Unless she tripped and fell face first into the open ledger..." Oh, man, I burst out laughing! Way to go, LG!
Op is an amazing dad and Anna is just wanting op to spend that money on her.
Gold digger IMHO.
#1 get rid of Anna
#2 she is in your business, before it has become any of hers
#3 she has shown her jealous side, and it will only get worse
#3 definatley. She probably has BPD. So it's going to be exreme chaos every time she has a negative emotion.
Dude, Anna needs to hit the road, she has absolutely no right to dictate how you spend your money!
Dump the girlfriend, she a jealous selfish self centered child. Your son is you number one priority. You are a great dad. Keep up the good work.
OP is prioritizing the happiness and well being of his child. It is none of his girlfriend’s business. Her jealousy was a major red flag.
Great job Dad for being a decent human to your ex partner and your son.
As for this female aka Anna. You need to step away and recognize WHO she is showing who she is. BELIEVE that. She is going to forever have an issue with Carrie and your son.
As long as it's not her money that OP is giving Carrie, it's none of Anna's business what he is giving Carrie and their son.
Glad OP ended that immature relationship cause what the actually heck was Anna on???
Story 3: Her revenge plot wouldn't have worked if the friend was a real friend…
First story warmed my heart, that is an awesome dad who loves his child and is able to get along with the mother of his child even though they aren’t dating
Story 1: Why was the GF going thru the OP's ledger? It's none of her business! So glad OP dumped this immature baby who has NO boundaries!
Checking to see how much money he has and she can count on for herself. IMHO
Damn, Anna has some nerve. Imagine telling a grown man what to do with his money concerning his son?
The dad is smart to keep good financial records. A good way to prove to the courts, just in case it becomes an issue down the road.
It’s refreshing that OP and the mother in the first story are able to be good co-parents and be mature for their child
Last story: What can you say. The lady kept her promise. 🤷🤣
NGL, I first read the thumbnail as “My girlfriend saw my fiancé” and I was like, yeah, that’s a problem, but then I reread it. Much less dramatic than when I first read the thumbnail.
Me too
Exactly what I read at first.
Story 1: People need to be honest with themselves about their partner's children and how it may affect their relationship. If you know you can't deal with them always putting their child before you and having to have "forever ties" to their ex dont get with them. Personally i would never get with someone who has kids because to me it's an unnecessary baggage. I dont want to deal with that dynamic and i make sure to put that on the table before we go anywhere. Honesty, even if it's kinda mean sometimes is way better than lying and going through all these problems.
It's good that a person knows what will or won't work for them in a relationship. All things considered, you seem to be a realist about your feelings, and that makes for better choices for you. Good on you!
1st story: the ex we all want, but only a few get….. he is a fantastic father and understanding ex. My ex-husband HAS the money, but does not want to part with it…..because he will hear it from his new wife. Kids come first!!! I receive NO child support and she is with me full time now. The court will see about that soon…..
only 9 months this whole time i thought this was a few years ongoing relationship???
It's vital when co-parenting to keep things positive. I would imagine Carrie appreciates the extra help, and their son benefits from both parents being happy with the situation. Aside from Anna prioritizing herself and potentially her own kids being an issue, how Carrie feels is important. Because if she starts feeling the son is being neglected by Anna, she'd be well within her rights to go to court and try to get custody changed. Not because OP was a bad parent, but because he was living with one.
1. She is sick of knowing his son is going to come before her. She isn't the right partner for a parent. It does sound like he puts a lot of money into supporting his ex and if they got together, playing second fiddle to the ex every time she wants something would be harmful. It isn't girlfriend's business yet, but it should be part of the moving in together discussion where a serious relationship discussion had to be involved. It just showed a massive incompatibility in the relationship and no point in wasting longer with someone that doesn't get that the parent role doesn't end when the son isn't present. The son would be seen as a distraction from her, and that will be an abusive environment. He will have trouble finding women the won't be leery of his eagerness to give his ex money all the time. It's reasonable to not trust it completely right off, but after 9 months she should have had a clue.
2. Bet family get togethers are a blast with those couples around....
3. Wow first red flag: "You are expected to cheat on me, and I fully intend to sleep with your best friend since he wants me. I'm also going to greatly enjoy rubbing how much your friend wants me frequently." Dude should have left her where he found her. She's a shit partner.
She warned him what she'd do if he cheated, so that's on him!
Self-fulfilling prophecy, honestly. She kept telling him that he'll cheat on her and he definitely fulfilled that expectation very well. Toxic relationship all around.
Finally a nice story of a caring father. Anna has issues!
I'm not even through the first part, and I can already tell Anna is not worth endangering the solid, mature co-parenting relationship he has with his ex. They sound like they have been able to do what is best for their son even though it didn't work out for them. Anyone who doesn't value that shouldn't be in OP's life
OP and his ex have a healthy coparenting relationship and I love it
Any reasonable person would be happy that a parent is doing their job and providing for their child with joy.
From my experience, anybody who makes a stink about a person giving money for their child's upkeep is bad news and will most likely with time try to drive a wedge between her partner and stepchild smh.
A smart woman would value a man like that.
I told my partner from the beginning of the relationship that if he ever cheated one me, I would sleep with his best friend." - She was threatening the guy the whole time and somehow is surprised that he cheated on her? That is abuse for crying out loud, not like that makes the cheating any better but she is a horrible human being herself so she doesn't really get to complain.
Last Story:
tbh I don't understand why the guy did even stay with her after her threat, yes he is an asshole for cheating, but I wouldn't want to be with someone as toxic as her
in the end I must say they did deserve each other^^
The thing is he was cheating from the begining of their relationship, so I'm not sure why he didn't leave when he heard her threat the first time, I'm sure he wasn't surprised when it happend.
@@emilyrosebery1848 yep, he cheated from the beginning and she threatened him and tbh if both are like that why are they even in a relationship
Why cheat at all and why cheat st the beginning when you are supposed to be all lovy dovy?
And while trust needs to be build and he was certainly unworthy of trust in the end, at the beginning of a relationship you need to show trust even though the other person did not have the chance to proof themself worthy of it, but her instantly threatening him is the opposite
@@Bleg94 maybe I wasn't fully paying attention but I don't think she was _instantly_ threatening him, I think it only really started coming up when he started acting shady as hell, only to get even more shady after she'd say it. Once you cheat your relationship is essentially over and it's only a matter of time before you get caught. She warned him and he fucked around and found out 🤷🏻♂️
@@owl7072 "I told my partner from the beginning of the relationship that if he ever cheated on me, I would sleep with his best friend."
Boyfriend is an asshole for cheating, but can't say OP is blameless either. Self-fulfilling prophecy is a thing.
I’m not done listening to story 1, but if I was dating that guy, I’d push to marry him, not complain. That would be sexy as shit to me that he’s always providing for his son.
I hope to be that good as a dad when i have kids ,and i Don't understand Anna at all, i mean, it should be a good sign for a person that their SO take good care of their Kids with the ex because it would mean he/she is a responsible and caring person.
Comment by LG: "Multiplying by zero" lololol I loved this comment!
Story 1: The girlfriend can't stand coming second or being equal to anyone even a child. Also girlfriend, not fiance or wife. "How dare you do something nice for your son who sounds like a good kid." What? I'm surpised people still use checks, money direct into the account is more typical but if it works, cool.
Girlfriend Anna: "There is no excuse for giving her that much money on top of child support!"
Bad news, kiddo. He doesn't need an excuse. He's done nothing wrong. It's not your money, not on the front end (came from his account) nor on the back end (you're not one of his dependents). Dude needs to ditch Anna, like live your life like she never existed kind of ditching her.
It’s none of her business what he does with his money. He bering a great dad
The first story…OP is the definition of a good man and Dad! His gf “Anna” can be shown the door because she is wrong asf! (And so glad he did break up with her) I would be proud of a man if that was my BF bc it shows a lot about his character and if I had his children, what kind of Dad he is. As long as he isn’t ruining their future (him and Anna’s) as a commenter said…then let that man take care of his child. As a single mom who struggled, that would have been appreciated having breathing room. I was listening to this story the whole time like this 😲😒😲😒
Second story…😂😂😂😂 they should have taken the offer for their hoarded house offered the first time! I would have loved to been a fly on the wall to see the hoarders faces 🤣
Third story 🤦🏾♀️🤣🤦🏾♀️🤣🤦🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️ jeez
Thanks LG! ❤️🥰
That story was a total example of "F&8 around and find out!"
What is it with partners telling men not to cover their child’s finances like what? He can afford and WANTS to give his son the best he can have.
Update I’m glad OP decided to break up with his immature ex. It was so cute to read that his son bought his dad a souvenir from HP world.
It's because a lot of women nowadays think the relationship is all about "me me me". god forbid if the man decides to help his ex with their kid
@@chetarisin3035 Most people get stuck in the high school mindset of dating and never learn what a real relationship is like.
Something similar happened with one of my cousins. Saying that she needs to stop wasting money on her daughter and more on him. Why do people hook up with single parents then get mad when said parent prioritize the kid over them?
@@chetarisin3035 This has nothing to do with women. Plenty of men are happy to do the bare minimum when it comes to financially supporting their child. We’ve seen that in plenty of reddit stories and we’ve seen plenty of men complain about having to pay child support. Do you blame men, whenever mom’s prioritize their boyfriends over their children? If a man can be swayed to mistreat their child due to partner, then he’s a bad parent and that’s solely on him.
Story 1: I'd think long and hard before getting any further involved with this woman. She invaded OP's privacy by snooping in his financial records. She's obviously jealous of the mother of OP's child and by extension, jealous of the child. This situation will only get worse if they move in together or marry. This is not the kind of woman OP wants as a stepmother to his little son.
It’s like “Anna” doesn’t understand how expensive theme parks actually are! Souveniers are expensive! I’m so proud of OP for doing these things! (I hope he saves enough to do things in teen years too)
Story #1: This man is phenomenal father!
Anna has a lot of nerve going through someone's financial records. She overstepped many boundaries, is insecure and immature. He's being a good dad, and I'm glad he saw the situation realistically and told her to go pound sand. Why is he using cheques? Just do an e transfer; quick, done and he enters it into his ledger. He needs to get with the times. LOL
Depends on the court system actually.. The reason is the courts would have to pay every credit card company for every transaction so courts are usually cash, check, money order and do NOT take credit or debit.. That's why.. Hehe
Checks provide a written record. We still use them for some things.
@@BusArch42 E-transfers are written records. They appear on the bank statement and the e-transfer window on the bank website have memo fields cheques.
@@Swnsasy I was talking about the money he sent the ex, not to credit card companies.
@@hilaryc3203 No no hon, read what I said again.. You stated, "Why is he using e- checks...." my comment was letting you know WHY he's using them.. Just throwing this in, the way you spell "CHECKS" are you not from the US? I have never seen that spelling before and it made me giggle, I like it.. Lol...
But, in the US, as I explained, that is how Child Support is given out, check, cash or money order.. E-check is NOT PROOF There is NO paying child support online or extra money.. I also explained WHY as well. Credit card companies would have to be paid if the use of credit or debit cards were used... So I'm telling you why he didn't use E-CHECK, it's not proof just incase.. Courts can be RIDICULOUS to men.. He's just using this was to cover his ass is all.. I hope that makes sense...
Whenever it's gets to the "it's that time, it's the end of the video" part I'm like NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
I never miss a vid, love this channel!!
Story 1
Single Mom of 4, 2 different sperm donors. (No offense to fathers who are present and available in their kids' lives) I basically raised my children with zero to very little input from either man, even while I was still together (married) to the 2nd man.
OP, you sir are an amazing man and a super amazing father!!! A parent's responsibility does not stop at "I paid my child support already" though most leave it like it does cover their responsibility for their children.
Reasons you have done nothing wrong:
1) Anna is a little too immature to realize how difficult parenting really is
2) She had zero right to look through your ledger, and even if it was a mistaken glance, she had zero right to say anything. She is jealous.
3) Helping Carrie with something that you know would make it more difficult for Carry to make ends meet if she paid is being conscience of just how much she puts into parenting and the differences in your finances
4) Even IF Carrie needed help purchasing certain types of clothing for her job and you paid for a week's worth of clothing, when she only asked for a "loan" until next paycheck so she could get certain type of pants is still absolutely within the scope of caring for your son, because without the help she may not have been able to take said job.
Also, OP if you haven't done so already and you do not want more children, have the surgery and make sure you do the year follow-up to have best chance of it completely severing and tying off the pathway. IT is reversable if you do decide to father another child in the future, this way you are unlikely to father another unless you decide to do so. It is also no different than a woman getting her tubes tied, except hers is much more difficult to undo, and more invasive of a procedure as to having to travel into the body compared to a male procedure, so if you're Squamish about it don't be.
I know someone like Anna. She is from very wealthy family, but her parents were usually very busy with their careers. So, eventually, they showered their daughter with money as their gesture of love. In the end, money is always associated with love to the daughter. Every present became money or giftcard. Otherwise, she would be moody for weeks. Recently, she went to see therapy for that, and she is getting better. Still, she often sees monetary value over thoughts whenever gifts were given. She is not a bad person, and in fact very generous but just different when it comes to love and affection I guess.
I’ve known people of divorced parents where the one paying child support would give money and gifts directly to the child instead of the other parent. It’s an underhanded way of buying the kid’s favor while simultaneously shooting a middle finger to the ex, and when they grow up they go from liking the payer parent to resenting them for their pettiness.
That would’ve been the kind of relationship OP would have with his son if he did what Anna wanted
1. You are a good dad. You and Carrie may not be husband and wife, but you share a relationship and a child. You are taking care of your people. It would be different if you were poor and Carrie was overly greedy.
A girlfriend may have the right to gently question and seek out your opinion, just because she needs to know you, to see if it's a sustainable relationship, but she has no right to criticize or demand anything.
I also find it odd she is reading your statements. Snoop
My old boyfriend had 2 kids from a previous marriage. We lived together for 5 years. It was understood from the get-go that if he wanted to give his ex money for his kids above and beyond what he already paid in child support that that is what he would do. I never had a problem with it and, in fact, encouraged it. I can't understand why anyone would have a problem with someone giving their child money. It's not anyone else's business. OP needs to cut her loose.
9 months? That's ridiculous. OP sounds like a great Dad and takes his responsibility seriously. Good on you for stepping up and dumping the entitled brat. Anna sounds like a gold digger. Anne needs to stay in her lane.
Story 1. I'm thinking that if, after 9 months, you still hadn't introduced your son to new exGF then you already felt something wrong deep in the back of your mind. Had you introduced them at maybe 6 months, you would've known to split sooner or they could've started to build a bond of sorts & maybe her reaction might have been different but I think it's more she's insecure/jealous of your sons mum
That’s what I thought . Subconsciously, he already know who she was
I mean not always lol. You can be with someone for a year and not want ur kids to meet.
I loved that first OP just cut to the chase and broke up with Anna. Alls well that ends well.
OP's GF is out of line. GF is Jealous of a 5 y/o. You're doing a good job setting aside your differences with your ex and doing good by your son. Get rid of the GF - she's picking fights ith a child.
Dad of the year here. He is great and wonderful.
I don't know the circumstances of OP's breakup with Carrie, but if there were no major issues like cheating, I'd dump Anna and try to get back with her. OP and Carrie seem like decent people, whereas Anna obviously will never adapt to his relationship with his child and the child's mother. It's possible OP and Carrie have matured and are ready for a long term relationship. In the end, OP and Anna broke up, but if he was going to stay with someone like Anna (why?) condoms, condoms, condoms, all the time. Even better: a vasectomy, if you don't want more kids.
Maybe it's because I have kids, maybe it's just a sense of common decency, but I cannot IMAGINE not helping my husband take care of my kids if we split and it was needed and I had the ability. Or even just doing the occasional nice thing for them if I couldn't take one of my weekends with them. Like WTF. I know my ass would leave a partner for not treating their kid and the ex that had the kids with as much kindness and respect as possible.
Omg story three ... that's next level revenge!
It was good of Anna to drop all her red flags at once.
The girlfriend is an evil stepmother before she's even married!!!
17:35 I mean I would be proud of it lmao
I don't like to be the one to tell OP's to run...but OP needs to run. He's an amazing dad and has an amazing co-parent relationship with his Ex. Sometimes that's worth more than all the Anna's in the world.
Man,the ex gf is very unreasonable. She expecting OP would prioritize her more than his son ? Why is she dating a divorce man in the first place if she can't accept OP situation ? Smh.
She saw an easy target.
@@LadyGoddessSephiroth well she's proven wrong,OP is not a doormat. Good for OP.
@@hi_stranger9156 Agreed. I also don't think she was just inexperienced with dating a man with children. I think she's spoiled rotten and just wanted someone to continue to spoil her. Any adult that gets jealous of a child and wants to take things from them to make themselves happy is a butthole.
First Story: How much extra did OP give the ex for food? How many days were they going to be there? Years, and I mean years ago I bought one hot dog, small fries, and small drink at Disneyland and was out $20. I can see eating in the park might cost a pretty penny for two meals for a couple of days. Having breakfast there too and wow, those receipts might cause a heart attack. We haven't even covered mementos for mom and son, or getting a nice gift to bring back to dad. It's almost a requirement that you go in bareheaded and buy a hat to wear while there.
"How dare you to pay for your kids to have a good life, I demand you use all your money on me and my kids !!!". Dump her and save the convo, such horrible women are quite capable of ruin your life when find that cant get their way.
I really hope op gets back with baby mama.
Been watching your vids for a while without login - my bad. You do a great job. Subbed!
Story 1: gosh maybe try and get back together with Carrie as she seems waaay more reasonable
Story 1 op. Is the kinda dad you want when they parents aren't together
Anna had no buisness looking into his account ledger or even commenting on the money OP spends on his son. OP is an awesome father co-parenting for his son!
That's the mother of his child, and he can give as much as he deems appropriate. Carrie's raising his son and he's being a supportive co-parent. Anna is acting like a child
I think carrying of the cold shoulder be 50/50 and any stuff for kid expenses should be split that way.
Gf insecure because he gave money not only in trip for kid but also paid for his ex. But kid is not able to go somewhere by himself after all . Some ppl shouldn't date parents because not everyone can handle ex in their life being seen as a priority.
You’ve been with your gf 9 months and she’s already trying to dictate how you handle your son?! Run, my guy! Red flags everywhere!
No, Anna wants to control OP's money. Money for Carrie and son means less for her.. Kick her to the curb OP.
Kick the greedy girlfriend to the curb.
You're a great dad. Your child's mom is a gem. Anna needs to park it, and she is dancing out the door. Don't, do not let Anna be a part of your son's life, he will be here, asking if I should reconcile with my dad, after he allowed my stepmom, ruin my life.
You are both wonderful parents
Ditch that girlfriend, she is not
Story One: OMG! A man who’s taking care of son!
Oh the humanity!🙀
WTF SHE NEED TO GET LOST AND YOU CONTINUE BEING A GREAT MAN AND DAD
Support your child as you should, but keep strict boundaries with your childs mother as strictly co-parenting. OP is not missing out on much in that relationship if she can't understand that kids are priority.
Tyvm LG.. Stay safe please. PEACE
OP, get rid of that bold faced gold digger. She is way out of line and this is a huge red flag.
Story 1: "Obviously I'm not making it out to my son because he's 5 and doesn't have a bank account" this was funny to me idk why
Edit: I'm not one to insult people often but like..... Anna is so dumb I'm sorry. "If it was _really_ for your son then why does it say it's for Carrie???" Because as Op said, he's 5 and doesn't have a bank account. What's she expecting, a 5 year old to receive a check and not only know what it is, but to also just go "Ah yes, why thank you father, this money will be well spent on the Harry Potter world trip that I begged mother dearest to take me on. Yes yes, this will do quite nicely. I shall store it away in my private bank account that us young children have."
1)
He is amazing for doing what he does, especially paying her hospital bills because he understands she needs to be healthy because she takes care of their child. His girlfriend doesn't get a say, she's not his wife, she's not making the money that he's using, that is a huge red flag for her to overreact like that and that would probably be enough for me to say I don't really think I want to continue this relationship.
Edit: Carrie sounds like an awesome mom. And if he ever loved her of course he's always going to even if it's not the same, that's a mother of his child there will always be a spot in his heart for her because of what she does for their son alone. Anna sounds selfish and like she wants the money to go to her instead, I'm 100% confident that she wouldn't say no if he gave her all that money instead.
Carrie is an awesome mom, she's understanding and cares for their child with so much love. It's a shame (as far as where I am in the story) that they couldn't make it work out, but I'm glad that for their son they're doing good :)
Alsoooo:
Even if he does stay with this girl I would change all of my bank documents and hide other private information especially of my sons. And because I know True Crime and read it so well I would even be prepared for a lawyer because there's a chance she might try and discredit Carrie and have her son taken away from her and try and be new mommy. I would also pay for not only your house but for Carrie as well to have cameras with night vision and audio throughout main portions of the house and maybe even bedrooms so if anything happens there's proof. I would also stop all sex with Anna, if she sees the end near or just wants to try and get control she may suddenly become pregnant and I think we all know she won't be a good mom like Carrie
Duse is a great dad his ex is not able to fully provide for the child but he siplemwnta his child what a great guy
*reads title* My derp another one with an ex being a mama of OP child and girlfriend has a problem with OP paying child support. Might as well end it
He sounds like a good dad you need a new girl friend
Good stories today, as usual. All's well that ends well. Thank you.
1st story: RUN!. Just fucking run bro.
In the US, when submitting an offer on a house the seller generally has 48 hours to accept or decline the offer.
Story one
Everyone: well done OP