I work in a shop, I'm a seller, I talk to maybe 20-30 people every day (and it's ALL about masking). Sometimes I shut down while working, and I feel like the world is RUSHING around me while I'm like floating under water very slowly... and it's very difficult to me talking and of course I can't smile. I need to go "to the toilet" often so I can sit in silence 5 minutes and then go on working. I often say to my mates: "My batteries are off". It's very hard.
Oh gosh your description sounds so familiar for me. I'm not diagnosed on the spectrum but everything in this video and what you've just described, is something I experience too.
Thank you so much for describing shutdowns. Before I found out that I had autism, I thought that maybe my blood sugar was low. But trail mix didn't help. Or was it my blood pressure? Why was my brain shutting down? It felt like a traffic jam in the brain, nothing moving up there.
I am newly self diagnosed and I had no idea shutdowns were a thing! I used to call them my "frozen days" and they are much more prevalent for me than meltdowns especially when I was pushed too hard in therapy or by partners. Thank you SO MUCH for this video and all you're doing. 💕
I'm self-dx'd myself and then took 3 legit ASD tests online (one was the AQ) which I scored moderate to severe symptoms of what was formerly known as Asperger's. Anywho, these shut downs that Olivia is talking about is something also fairly new I'm learning about and it explains about half my life!! When traumatic things happen it can lead us into a shut down. I've been in one for over a decade now. Maybe longer 😭 I go through smaller ones within this larger one, too. When that happens my mind goes completely blank, I stare off or down, can't talk, can't look at people, faze out and numb out. It's like being in a perpetual nightmare that never lifts. I wonder if this is what it's like for more severe forms of autism??🤔 😳🥺
@@cerealis_5432 I‘d recommend Aspie quiz. Idrlabs has a good test and AQ test. Try to answer as honestly as possible and maybe average the results of 3 test over a larger timespan. These question can also help you reflect on your own behaviour
The longer one you are referring to is most likely autistic burnout which is common in undiagnosed adults. Also there is no such thing as moderate or severe autism, you're either Autistic or you're not. There are different comorbidities that can come along with being an autistic person and can make it appear more "severe". But like you were saying on days when you are in a deep shut down to someone who doesn't know you, you could appear to be "severely autistic" whereas other days if you're in an environment that supports you or you're just having a great day, someone can say your only mildly autistic or maybe not at all. When in reality you're just an autistic person. I truly wish you the best on this journey of self-exploration and getting to know yourself under a new lense. Because I know for me finding out I was autistic saved my life. While some days I still struggle greatly most of the time I am relieved and proud to know William.
@Pateck Aaron you cannot free or cure someone from being an autistic person. That's like saying you put different gasoline in a car and now it's a truck. It doesn't work like that. Your child will always be an autistic person. And that's something you should be proud of.
I had a day at work at a new department in my grocery store training to be a barista. I was so overwhelmed by the recipes my coworker being rude and condescending. It got really busy and within 2 hours I like I wasn’t fully there. I felt the world felt surreal. I couldn’t function well I stood there at times when my other coworkers were making drinks and doing the register. I think I did some small stuff but I was on auto-plane mode. I couldn’t even and couldn’t process what anyone was saying. On the second day my coworker was being mean again and condescending. She even got mad at me for doing something wrong on the register. She grabbed at my elbow! She was very annoyed that I didn’t know what to write on the cups. She had me deliver a cashier’s coffee to her and I was getting so emotional and crying because I was overwhelmed. I came back and she right away tried to have me take an order from a customer I was so overwhelmed and crying a little that I couldn’t comprehend what the woman was saying. I started bawling really hard and she made me take a break. I called my mom hyperventilating and crying. She had to tell me to take deep breaths. When I talking for a bit I couldn’t get myself to stop hyperventilating and I was confused what it was at that point. It took me hours when I got home to know what that was. Also the store at times has random loud sounds and the expresso machine was loud.
You went back on the second day - you are a very gutsy person and far braver than me. There is no way I could deal with all the noise, loads of customers, AND obnoxious coworkers. To be honest, I don’t see how anyone can be expected to learn something from scratch in that kind of environment, even most neurotypical people would have a problem.
Ah bless you, your colleagues sound awful also your boss for not understanding. If you have not already get a job with a company that is more sympathetic to your welfare and one you enjoy.
The irritability is for sure a sign I’m either headed for a shut down or meltdown. I can relate on people not listening to me, I wanted to go mountain biking but my fiancé wanted to go on a trail I remembered was too rocky. He said it wasn’t and it would be fun, and low and behold it was too rocky and we ended up leaving with me in a bad mood. Then afterwards I feel guilty even though I really didn’t do anything wrong. This was really helpful, whenever I watch a video of yours I feel a lot less alone. Thank you.
For me shutdowns are more common. I'm exhausted, slow. My brain feels like walking through honey... Sticky, slimy but not solid. I can talk, but it's very exhausting. So I'm avoiding it. My body feels so heavy, sometimes even showering is to much effort. In this situation I need a quite place and rest. And I can't do much for the rest of the day. Thanks for the description! This helps so much. Not just knowing that I'm not weired, but also to explain it to others.
I had never heard of shut downs before but that is exactly what happened to me recently - I shut down for a full weekend. I had been pushed by my partner on a Wednesday to have these intense conversations for him to feel better about a subject but I didn;t have enough time in between the talks to process our talks. Thursday evening I had a lovely time with my high school friends for dinner but instead of going to bed happy he called and needed to talk again. These talks are exhausting. Friday evening after work again he needed to talk this out and I was at my edge and told him so. I tried to "be there for him" Saturday morning by accompanying him to the hospital to visit his friend, but in the car on the way I started feeling disassociated. I became unable to do anything but sit quietly and not engage. When I finally got home my head was feeling like it wanted to pop, I went to bed and lay still for hours - no tv, no lights on. It lasted all weekend and I had a lot of time to think - to see things clearly too. When I recovered it was my time to talk things out.
OMG THE SLEEP THING! That explains why I often went to 'sleep things off' when I was younger!! Yesterday, I had my first 'concious shutdown' where I knew what it was. And it felt just like my brain pulling the plug. It just needed to not process at that moment. My week has been a whole lot of everything and I didn't have time in between things. So at an (quite safe) event full of people I felt it coming. I was SO annoyed by the tiniest sounds and just felt this urge of leaving the room and being alone. So I did and found a quiet corner on the stairs. Then my brain just powered down. My brain pulled the plug to my body so it just hung there and if I had forced any movement it probably would have been exhausting. It felt like it was barely possible anyways. The lights were dim and the area quiet. And I was in this meta state of enjoying the decompressing process and was kind of happy i knew what it was. Also, I'm proud I left the overwhelming environment for a while. Wouldn't have done that when i was younger and probably just gotten more and more irritable to the point of a meltdown.
I JUST now understand the difference between melt down and shut down! @Olivia Hopps, I was diagnosed approximately 8 years ago, so I was 34-ish. I had no one who understood and barely anyone that believes me. But I’ve experienced this and been SO confused. Selective mutism, and disassociated. Thank you so extremely much.
This was me today, I just went and sat with my cat, shut my eyes and focused on listening to his breathing. I had a lot of stress build up, got the irritability, snapped mean words at my partner then went to sit with my cat, I feel exhausted now. So can relate.
You just brought back childhood memories. I'm like, "Huh, interesting. That's what those were." I'm learning so much about the me of my past and realizing I was more normal than I thought -- normal neuro-divergent. I thank God for your insights and time shared to make these videos. Nice work!
I was diagnosed with autism a couple months ago at 26. My amazing adhd therapist (which had diagnosed me with adhd earlier this year) noticed I showed signs of autism as well. She was right. I have always tended towards shutdowns, but always thought they were panic attacks of some kind. That's how I described them to others anyway, even though I knew it didn't quite fit. When I have them, it becomes hard to move. I start moving as if I were a clockwork device, with tick-tocking-like motions. I lose my ability to speak. Sometimes I cry, other times I don't. My adhd brain is oddly quite during this time too. Only a couple repeating thoughts flip through my head rather than many directionless ones. I'm exhausted by the time it passes. I usually have to just lay on the floor until I am physically able to move to my bed. I sometimes sleep the lingering effects off if I'm able. If not, they can stick around until I go to bed at night. I am able to mask them if I'm not at home, but only to an extent. I won’t be crying, but I might fail to respond and won't move from my spot to avoid the clockwork motions. Masking them usually just delays the more extreme shutdown to come though. It's interesting, how much sense my life makes after being diagnosed. It explains everything from having to learn how to socialize through trial and error, to explaining why there would be times when my thoughts failed to be translated into spoken words. It explains why I am very sensitive to stimuli, and why I was chronically overwhelmed. It explains why treating my depression and anxiety through therapy never worked, because the cause wasn't being treated. It also explains why I did so well in school though. School was one of my special interests. I loved learning and still do. It explains how I was able to absorb so much information. It explains so much. Sorry for the life story. I'm just happy I finally have it figured out. I've been searching for help for years now, and now I finally know what's up. Neurodivergent girls weren't diagnosed in my region when I was a kid. I'm happy we're now talking about and researching that adhd and autism can look like in girls and women. I hope it will prove to provide little neurodivergent girls access to the resources they need by getting their diagnosis. Heaven knows it would have helped me and others like me.
At the age of 41, I listen to your videos and I realize I should see a doctor. I have been diagnosed with OCD, anxiety and depression, as well as hints of ADHD. When I am seriously stressed I stop talking. I stop moving. I will stand still for hours. My son's will talk to me and I can't answer. I can't move. When I start to come out of it, I start with texting. I still can't speak but I can start to formulate brief text messages. I don't know if a diagnosis would help but it would be an explanation.
I am not autistic, but there is definitely a lot I can relate to about this. The severity is clearly not the same, but my brain definitely cannot work when too stressed/tired/too much information overload. Might be linked to how sensitive I am in general for my case. Definitely interesting to hear about your experience as someone with ASD.
Thank you, Olivia! 🙏 Watching your videos makes me feel like I am not alone or crazy. I am great at masking but over the past few years it's become harder and harder. I believe I am at a burnout stage (I am 49. That's a lot of masking!). Your videos are a great help and I have decided to get an official diagnosis. Keep up the amazing work you are doing to spread awareness about autism! 👏👏👏
Thank you so much for your extremely kind comment, Tanya! I'm so glad my videos could help you. It also definitely sounds like you're going through burnout. This happened to me in high school. I could no longer mask or function at all. My advice would be to take a break, get some rest. Something so that your brain can try to heal itself a little before you go past the point of no return and can't function at all as I did. Best of luck on your diagnoses journey, and I'm here if you need anything! God Bless 💙
@@tracik1277 Tell me about it! I am premenopausal and riding the hormonal waves while experiencing autistic burnout must be one of the most challenging situations I have ever encountered. Now I not only get exhausted by social interactions, they down right irritate me! 😁 I basically want to be a hermit. 😂
Is this a shutdown? I was at a big stadium to enjoy a Spiritual Convention. The kids behind my seat wouldn't stop talking, eating or kicking my seat. I was 1. Already exhausted 2. feeling my social phobia kicking in plus I'm menopausal. I had to get up and leave and couldn't stop crying for hours. It felt like a panic attack but no racing heartbeat or feeling like I was dying. What I felt was so much anger and overly stimulated. I became embarrassed because I lost complete control of my emotions. I was never diagnosed but have ADD. Just curious if this feeling was what you describe??
I tend to get shutdowns before meltdowns where I really don't wanna talk, and it takes a lot of effort, and you get "mh's" and "uh huh's" out of me at most, and I get more and more irritable being expected to respond or interact. Generally, I just wanna be left alone and not have any demands placed upon me. If that doesn't happen, I start to get really snappy, lose control over the things I say, and at worst get really loud and raging, feeling as if my head is a noisy radio channel that is about to explode, and sometimes I will break down and cry after a bout of what feels like uncontrollable anger. I don't actually get shutdowns where I can't do anything, that only happens when I reach burnout, but I can usually still speak, depends with whom. What I've described is the private version, in public I have internal meltdowns where I feel like I'm about to explode but instead I implode, I get many inner visuals of slamming my head against things and screaming as loud as I can't but I don't, and I refrain from speaking to anybody as much as possible, unless something should set me off. So far so good though in public. Sounds like a lot of women experienced internalized meltdowns that feel like they just break you down from the inside, erode you. But the horror (shame) of losing it in public is just too great, because, well, no one would understand.
I get this in specific busy places. Like Christmas fairs, or malls during holiday seasons. Or even amusement parks. The mixture of the sensory overwhelm, the crowds, having to keep walking as the flow of people goes, and having to walk against people while holding bags or a coat.. and the heat. I am a very chatty person and in these situations I shut down. I've even fainted once when I was pregnant. It's awful.
You have no idea how much you’re videos have been helping me since I found your channel last year. The way you explain everything helps me understand myself better and it helps my family understand me as well. Thank you so so much Olivia! God Bless!!! 💗
Usually I just start yawning a lot and can't make decisions. That's why grocery shopping is difficult too much stimulation to get your attention and the decisions you have to make. Yesterday my head was pulsating as I left the store.
I am very prone to shutdowns. I almost never have meltdowns, but shutdowns are fairly common. It could be because I also have dissociative disorder associated with PTSD, possibly. Thank you for doing these videos. You are far braver than I am!.
You are incredibly brave, Mimi. Don't ever think otherwise! You clearly have battled some tough things, but are still here and made it through! You got this 💪🏻
You look beautiful!! I'm so glad to have another female to relate to. All the things that have caused so many shutdowns over the yrs could have been so easily avoided diagnosed earlier.
First, thank you so much for your sweet comment! This was a new look and I wasn't sure it looked good lol. But I'm so sorry you had to deal with all of this stuff too. As you said, it could have all been avoided had we been diagnosed earlier. This is why I make these videos, so other young girls can get diagnosed and don't have to go through the same stuff we did.
When I get overwhelmed, if I get to the point where I start crying, I actually go into a fugue state & get amnesia, the next day i won't remember crying or what i cried about. The meltdown totally wiped me out, then I pass out. And I black out, I just know it happened bcuz I wake with puffy red eyes, my face swollen, my body sore from tensing up, then I have to piece bits & pieces together. Then I feel shame & embarrassment and it paralyzed me for days
That's how I get sometimes - I've had to explain it as needing to 'reboot'. I'm pretty much catatonic during them. I've noticed that I can force myself out of them and to continue to mask but if I do the resulting meltdown is virtually inevitable and much worse than it would otherwise be.
Thanks for sharing this! I find that I extremely rarely experience meltdowns (at least as an adult, I don't honestly remember whether or not I had them as a child), but I frequently experience shutdowns. So many of my autistic symptoms are internal rather than external, so I never thought I might be autistic until late 2023 (at 36 years old). I had looked into it a bit before that, wondering if it might be possible, but because a lot of what I was reading talked more about external cues than internal ones, I dismissed the possibility. It wasn't until watching videos about adult women with ADHD (which I also have) who were also autistic that things finally started to click. So thank you again for sharing your experiences and your research, because it really is invaluable for someone like me.
I’m so happy that you’re posting more videos lately! You have helped me understand my recently diagnosed 16 yr old daughter in ways that no book or professional ever would have. Thank you, thank you, thank you Olivia!! 🙏🏻
Your clothes, make-up and hair are awesome in this video, you look so lovely with that lipstick, your skin tone and everything you had put on made you like a princess. Thank you for sharing your experience.
I sometimes get what I call "anxiety overload." One time i had to go to the dentist and I was so anxious. By the end I was feeling dizzy and couldnt speak properly. The dentist was talking to me and asking me things and I could barely answer! I felt so embarassed, they probably thought I was really stupid and strange 😫
The best way I can describe my shutdowns is it feels like my head and my body are not connected. I can’t talk or move. This lasts for between an hour and three hours. It normally ends when I start noticing some physical sensation like an itch. It’s really difficult to move and my limbs still feel really heavy, but eventually I’m able to scratch the itch. I’m usually physically exhausted for the rest of the day but no longer emotionally exhausted.
(suspecting autism but I'm not diagnosed) I became so overwhelmed while repeatedly recording takes for a piano performance during lockdown that i reached a point i couldn't even speak in order to introduce my pieces anymore. Also whenever I come home after school or going out to the mall I get a terrible headache and just need a rest/sleep so bad. Just listening to people's voices becomes grating and certain smells also trigger bad headaches - argh!
I'm so glad I found you! Not only are u open and genuine, but yoy are so charming and adorable to listen to. I have a question for ya. What do you eat? My 19 old daughter eats no meat. She is pretty malnutrition. Shd has an apt next week to try to get the ball rolling with diagnosis and tests for ADD and autism. Do you have say advice? I just don't want her to fall through the cracks. Thanks for putting yourself out there. I really appreciate you!
I’ve been In a perpetual state of shutdown since I started working full time two years ago. And before that, I experience them pretty much everyday when living at my parents with my nieces. I had to stay in my room, now my apartment, unless I need to go to work. And work is brutal for my senses and social interaction, and I can’t anymore. I’ll be going back to part time soon.
Well, i can only speak for myself but i also enjoy being autistic a lot. I notice so many things many people don't. My brain is its own source of entertainment. I am very VERY independent. My brain can make the smartest, most intelligent and funniest associations. I'm not afraid to go against the majority since I have always felt a bit 'different'so standing up for something comes easy to me. And I'm at an age where i don't worry too much what other people think and also know myself quite well. So if I had the choice I wouldn't trade in my brain. 😊❤
for me i get shutdowns the most when i get decision fatigue, which is really easy for me bc i just want shit to be done i hate indecisiveness it feels like a waste of time to me. I want straightforward
So interested you said that because I cannot make a decision to save my life. It's brutal! I was wondering if I was the only one. You have inspired me to do a video on this. Thanks for sharing!
I don’t know if this was a shutdown, but I remember a couple years ago on my birthday, my boyfriend wanted to throw me a small surprise party.. at a mall. With a few friends. The problem with that was I was going through a stressful period in my career and I wasn’t really in the mood to socialize. So I quickly became irritated when I found out, and I just shutdown I guess? I couldn’t make myself talk to anybody. If I did, it was a few short words, which I later realized was a little rude. I was sorry after. My bf didn’t throw me another surprise after that. He was upset at first but he understood when I explained.
I think ive noticed this consciously i received diagnosis report and dotn get me wrong im thrilled but at first i was like daydreaming or half in shock and felt like i wasn't thinking at all or feeling in the moment
People used to ask me if I had borderline personality disorder, and I used to tell them I was just shutting down to recover my emotional energy. I’ve had more shutdowns than meltdowns, though some of my shutdowns happen because I fight a meltdown too hard. The cycle is exhausting!
I had one of these last night after my fiance told me about new plans for the evening. I felt so guilty the whole time because I didn't want him to think it was his fault.
This was a very nice video! Thank you for sharing about autistic meltdowns, and your experiences with them. Pretty relatable, since I am also on the spectrum. Always enjoy your content:)
So glad it could give you insight! So, I've never actually had a full on meltdown in public. I've always been able to hold off until I was somewhere private (even in a public bathroom). When I feel one coming on, I try to get somewhere quiet and private. I'll try to listen to music to calm me down as well.
Just having dinner w my family. If everyone is talking at same time. I’ve made dinner after a work day. Tired. I can feel it happening at the table. My lovely family is all talking at once and before long I’m done.
I think i having a shutdown right now but not sure gott my diagnos 2016 so this is still werry new to me meltdown s i have had all my life its quit comon but att the moment im down, dont wanna talk, mody, no energy and so on but yea I cant completely shut down i have things to do but im so draind after T.T right and my bad thoughs ramp up big time
Sometimes when I get shutdowns either I would probably feel extremely exhausted or irritated but most of the time when I shut down I would cry because I don't understand I was diagnosed with Autism at the age of three by a doctor but I'm not sure what kind of doctor
I get shutdowns more often. But either way, even a meltdown is super exhausting. Had one yesterday, though (meltdown). Lasted a long time. First time in months for that. Shutdowns are like every week however
I‘ve been experiencing this regularly during group therapy lately. Needing days afterwards to recover and then not wanting to say anything in group therapy the week after that because I don‘t wanna experience another shutdown. My therapist „does not see any signs of autism in me at all“ so he just sees this as being stubborn and noncompliant. I feel stuck and don‘t know where to go with this …
@Pateck Aaron I wouldnt want to “save” my granddaughter from her autism,I love her as she is.She is no less a person because she has autism and you cant make autism disappear with herbs🙄
Ohhhhh this would be when my daughter with autism can't make a decision or answer a very simple question like when I ask if I can get her a drink, and she answers I DONT KNOW.
Oh my gosh thanks for this explanation (100% relate). Btw, such a lovely and cool hair/make/style! :) I'm waiting for autism evaluation, and this is one of the things that I think colleagues might notice and wonder about, and I need a diagnosis to be able to explain. I work in research and if I need to cooperate with others for days/weeks, shutdowns are almost inevitable from the exhaustion. Social skills drop and I cant mask anything. I become quiet, and sometimes can't find words to answer people because my brain can't function to find words... so I find myself just silent or stuttering something that doesnt come out the way I want. And I just have to get away because if it goes on a meltdown isnt far off as the frustration rises from not being able to talk. Could this be selective mutism? I just recently realised that it perhaps could be that :o
First, thanks so much for the comment on my hair style! It was a new look and I wasn't sure it looked good lol. But yes, this absolutely could be selective mutism. Something I would recommend setting up with your work/coworkers is a system to help you and them when you're going through a shutdown/selective mutism. Can you type or text or write during your shutdowns? If so, you could signal to your throat that you can't talk, and they would then in turn understand what was going on and could get you a computer or piece of paper to be able to communicate with them.
@@OliviaHops It suites you well imo! Its brave to dare to try something new, and you also inspire others to dare try out new styles and wear it proudly! Thank you for the very good and honest advice! I never really thought about the possibility of being open about it. Young academics are very scared of showing "weakness" early in our carreers. But even professors have them, and thers will also inevitably show when working together. So, no matter the reason (mutism or not) the esaiest way to avoid being anxious might be to just be open about it (and find alternative ways to communicate, like you said) :) Thanks again!!
When I get super overwhelmed I actually will feel physically ill, it's like everyone's (and the whole world, really) is yelling and it hurts my ears. I will feel headachey and nauseated. I can talk, but my words get mixed up and I start tuning out and just wanting to escape and be by myself. I just thought it was my adhd.
I have both AUTISM and Adhd Sometimes I get overwhelmed and frustrated Sometimes I just want to shunt down I live in group home with different women one women is mentally unstable, one women just stands as in a trance moving her hands like a spider they sometimes pace back and forth its drives me insane between the one who is mentally unstable and the women who stands as if they are in a trance moving their hands like a spider. I have meltdowns or I shunt down.
@@OliviaHops if I find out anything helpful, I will let you know. I’m still in the investigating stage. My daughter’s behavior stem from a a benign tumor in her bladder a few years ago. It changes over time, and the severity fluctuates.
I think I have something a lot like a shutdown, but I'm not sure that's what it is. There's a few versions or "subtypes" of whatever it is. One tends to be very, very short, but I'm starey and not at all taking in what's happening. I often stop breathing for a moment, too. I think this one tends to be my tiredness making me be overstimulated from something that's normally fine, like watching youtube. Or it's happened in class, in which case idk the logic behind when it does or doesn't happen Another is that my brain is just lagging behind and I can't do or understand things that I do just fine the next day. This one tends to be the very, very very irritable, I can't deal with anything type. There's not enough space in my brain and I can't filter out things like my sister humming waaay less then usual, and i'm already a little bad at doing that. This happens mostly when I'm doing homework The last one I can think of right now is one I've only noticed recently. It's when I can't focus because lots of little noises and coversations around me just take up too much space. This one has some of the staring that the first one does. Oh and I have little (and very uncommon) mini-freezes, like when a teacher was trying to call me over and my brain just stopped. Maybe 30 seconds at the longest, less most of the time?
Omg. I was just thinking on the train the other day - because I was trying to figure out what was wrong with me - I was in safe mode like on a computer 😅
Hey! this sounds similar to what happens to me. I know I have major depression. I need to take naps often, low energy generally every day. I'm not sure if this is related to my depression. what do you think? I have thought that I was on the spectrum but it hasn't been confirmed. I noticed some of the symptoms are the same because I also get irritated but that's also part of depression haha idk
Do shutdowns last a few days? Mime seem to and people keep thinking it's bipolar bit it's just my body can't do anymore. My brain can't take anything jn. My feelings towards people diminish and I just want to sit alone in a room for days with no noise.
I just learned thanks to you... That all those experiences i had were autistic shutdowns. Feels good to have an actual name for it. But now that i know what it is, i also know that i'm kinda stuck with it -_- i'm really low functioning at the moment. And trying to figure out what works. It helps knowing that this is something i should be aware of and plan around because obviously i want to avoid it *but not avoid every new or valuable experience because of it*.
Thank you and you played football. A girl after my own heart I would play basket ball in a dress and think nothing of it. I was a tomboy but still was girly too...lol.
I work in a shop, I'm a seller, I talk to maybe 20-30 people every day (and it's ALL about masking). Sometimes I shut down while working, and I feel like the world is RUSHING around me while I'm like floating under water very slowly... and it's very difficult to me talking and of course I can't smile. I need to go "to the toilet" often so I can sit in silence 5 minutes and then go on working. I often say to my mates: "My batteries are off". It's very hard.
Oh gosh your description sounds so familiar for me. I'm not diagnosed on the spectrum but everything in this video and what you've just described, is something I experience too.
Thank you so much for describing shutdowns. Before I found out that I had autism, I thought that maybe my blood sugar was low. But trail mix didn't help. Or was it my blood pressure? Why was my brain shutting down? It felt like a traffic jam in the brain, nothing moving up there.
I was similar! I always thought I needed protein. Thanks for sharing your experience with me :)
I am newly self diagnosed and I had no idea shutdowns were a thing! I used to call them my "frozen days" and they are much more prevalent for me than meltdowns especially when I was pushed too hard in therapy or by partners. Thank you SO MUCH for this video and all you're doing. 💕
I'm self-dx'd myself and then took 3 legit ASD tests online (one was the AQ) which I scored moderate to severe symptoms of what was formerly known as Asperger's.
Anywho, these shut downs that Olivia is talking about is something also fairly new I'm learning about and it explains about half my life!!
When traumatic things happen it can lead us into a shut down.
I've been in one for over a decade now. Maybe longer 😭
I go through smaller ones within this larger one, too. When that happens my mind goes completely blank, I stare off or down, can't talk, can't look at people, faze out and numb out. It's like being in a perpetual nightmare that never lifts.
I wonder if this is what it's like for more severe forms of autism??🤔 😳🥺
@@LisaPFrampton what are the official tests you took online? I’d like to take them as well!
@@cerealis_5432 I‘d recommend Aspie quiz. Idrlabs has a good test and AQ test. Try to answer as honestly as possible and maybe average the results of 3 test over a larger timespan. These question can also help you reflect on your own behaviour
The longer one you are referring to is most likely autistic burnout which is common in undiagnosed adults. Also there is no such thing as moderate or severe autism, you're either Autistic or you're not. There are different comorbidities that can come along with being an autistic person and can make it appear more "severe". But like you were saying on days when you are in a deep shut down to someone who doesn't know you, you could appear to be "severely autistic" whereas other days if you're in an environment that supports you or you're just having a great day, someone can say your only mildly autistic or maybe not at all. When in reality you're just an autistic person. I truly wish you the best on this journey of self-exploration and getting to know yourself under a new lense. Because I know for me finding out I was autistic saved my life. While some days I still struggle greatly most of the time I am relieved and proud to know William.
@Pateck Aaron you cannot free or cure someone from being an autistic person. That's like saying you put different gasoline in a car and now it's a truck. It doesn't work like that. Your child will always be an autistic person. And that's something you should be proud of.
I had a day at work at a new department in my grocery store training to be a barista. I was so overwhelmed by the recipes my coworker being rude and condescending. It got really busy and within 2 hours I like I wasn’t fully there. I felt the world felt surreal. I couldn’t function well I stood there at times when my other coworkers were making drinks and doing the register. I think I did some small stuff but I was on auto-plane mode. I couldn’t even and couldn’t process what anyone was saying.
On the second day my coworker was being mean again and condescending. She even got mad at me for doing something wrong on the register. She grabbed at my elbow! She was very annoyed that I didn’t know what to write on the cups. She had me deliver a cashier’s coffee to her and I was getting so emotional and crying because I was overwhelmed. I came back and she right away tried to have me take an order from a customer I was so overwhelmed and crying a little that I couldn’t comprehend what the woman was saying. I started bawling really hard and she made me take a break. I called my mom hyperventilating and crying. She had to tell me to take deep breaths. When I talking for a bit I couldn’t get myself to stop hyperventilating and I was confused what it was at that point. It took me hours when I got home to know what that was.
Also the store at times has random loud sounds and the expresso machine was loud.
You went back on the second day - you are a very gutsy person and far braver than me. There is no way I could deal with all the noise, loads of customers, AND obnoxious coworkers. To be honest, I don’t see how anyone can be expected to learn something from scratch in that kind of environment, even most neurotypical people would have a problem.
Ah bless you, your colleagues sound awful also your boss for not understanding. If you have not already get a job with a company that is more sympathetic to your welfare and one you enjoy.
The irritability is for sure a sign I’m either headed for a shut down or meltdown. I can relate on people not listening to me, I wanted to go mountain biking but my fiancé wanted to go on a trail I remembered was too rocky. He said it wasn’t and it would be fun, and low and behold it was too rocky and we ended up leaving with me in a bad mood. Then afterwards I feel guilty even though I really didn’t do anything wrong. This was really helpful, whenever I watch a video of yours I feel a lot less alone. Thank you.
For me shutdowns are more common. I'm exhausted, slow. My brain feels like walking through honey... Sticky, slimy but not solid. I can talk, but it's very exhausting. So I'm avoiding it. My body feels so heavy, sometimes even showering is to much effort. In this situation I need a quite place and rest. And I can't do much for the rest of the day. Thanks for the description! This helps so much. Not just knowing that I'm not weired, but also to explain it to others.
I had never heard of shut downs before but that is exactly what happened to me recently - I shut down for a full weekend. I had been pushed by my partner on a Wednesday to have these intense conversations for him to feel better about a subject but I didn;t have enough time in between the talks to process our talks. Thursday evening I had a lovely time with my high school friends for dinner but instead of going to bed happy he called and needed to talk again. These talks are exhausting. Friday evening after work again he needed to talk this out and I was at my edge and told him so. I tried to "be there for him" Saturday morning by accompanying him to the hospital to visit his friend, but in the car on the way I started feeling disassociated. I became unable to do anything but sit quietly and not engage. When I finally got home my head was feeling like it wanted to pop, I went to bed and lay still for hours - no tv, no lights on. It lasted all weekend and I had a lot of time to think - to see things clearly too. When I recovered it was my time to talk things out.
OMG THE SLEEP THING! That explains why I often went to 'sleep things off' when I was younger!!
Yesterday, I had my first 'concious shutdown' where I knew what it was. And it felt just like my brain pulling the plug. It just needed to not process at that moment.
My week has been a whole lot of everything and I didn't have time in between things. So at an (quite safe) event full of people I felt it coming. I was SO annoyed by the tiniest sounds and just felt this urge of leaving the room and being alone. So I did and found a quiet corner on the stairs. Then my brain just powered down. My brain pulled the plug to my body so it just hung there and if I had forced any movement it probably would have been exhausting. It felt like it was barely possible anyways. The lights were dim and the area quiet.
And I was in this meta state of enjoying the decompressing process and was kind of happy i knew what it was. Also, I'm proud I left the overwhelming environment for a while. Wouldn't have done that when i was younger and probably just gotten more and more irritable to the point of a meltdown.
You describe all of these issues so well that it gives me an understanding that I wouldn't otherwise have. Thanks, Olivia.
This is such a huge compliment. Thank you so much! I’m so glad I can make it make sense. 💙
I me and Olivia must be autism twins! Weird but we're awesome!
I JUST now understand the difference between melt down and shut down!
@Olivia Hopps, I was diagnosed approximately 8 years ago, so I was 34-ish. I had no one who understood and barely anyone that believes me. But I’ve experienced this and been SO confused. Selective mutism, and disassociated.
Thank you so extremely much.
My thoughts exactly Kelly. Olivia's videos are invaluable to me.
This was me today, I just went and sat with my cat, shut my eyes and focused on listening to his breathing. I had a lot of stress build up, got the irritability, snapped mean words at my partner then went to sit with my cat, I feel exhausted now. So can relate.
You just brought back childhood memories. I'm like, "Huh, interesting. That's what those were." I'm learning so much about the me of my past and realizing I was more normal than I thought -- normal neuro-divergent. I thank God for your insights and time shared to make these videos. Nice work!
I was diagnosed with autism a couple months ago at 26. My amazing adhd therapist (which had diagnosed me with adhd earlier this year) noticed I showed signs of autism as well. She was right.
I have always tended towards shutdowns, but always thought they were panic attacks of some kind. That's how I described them to others anyway, even though I knew it didn't quite fit.
When I have them, it becomes hard to move. I start moving as if I were a clockwork device, with tick-tocking-like motions. I lose my ability to speak. Sometimes I cry, other times I don't. My adhd brain is oddly quite during this time too. Only a couple repeating thoughts flip through my head rather than many directionless ones. I'm exhausted by the time it passes. I usually have to just lay on the floor until I am physically able to move to my bed. I sometimes sleep the lingering effects off if I'm able. If not, they can stick around until I go to bed at night.
I am able to mask them if I'm not at home, but only to an extent. I won’t be crying, but I might fail to respond and won't move from my spot to avoid the clockwork motions. Masking them usually just delays the more extreme shutdown to come though.
It's interesting, how much sense my life makes after being diagnosed. It explains everything from having to learn how to socialize through trial and error, to explaining why there would be times when my thoughts failed to be translated into spoken words. It explains why I am very sensitive to stimuli, and why I was chronically overwhelmed. It explains why treating my depression and anxiety through therapy never worked, because the cause wasn't being treated.
It also explains why I did so well in school though. School was one of my special interests. I loved learning and still do. It explains how I was able to absorb so much information. It explains so much.
Sorry for the life story. I'm just happy I finally have it figured out. I've been searching for help for years now, and now I finally know what's up. Neurodivergent girls weren't diagnosed in my region when I was a kid. I'm happy we're now talking about and researching that adhd and autism can look like in girls and women. I hope it will prove to provide little neurodivergent girls access to the resources they need by getting their diagnosis. Heaven knows it would have helped me and others like me.
I especially resonate with your 5th and 6th paragraph. Same for me!
At the age of 41, I listen to your videos and I realize I should see a doctor. I have been diagnosed with OCD, anxiety and depression, as well as hints of ADHD. When I am seriously stressed I stop talking. I stop moving. I will stand still for hours. My son's will talk to me and I can't answer. I can't move. When I start to come out of it, I start with texting. I still can't speak but I can start to formulate brief text messages. I don't know if a diagnosis would help but it would be an explanation.
Ocd and anxiety are common misdiagnoses in autistic people.
I am not autistic, but there is definitely a lot I can relate to about this. The severity is clearly not the same, but my brain definitely cannot work when too stressed/tired/too much information overload. Might be linked to how sensitive I am in general for my case. Definitely interesting to hear about your experience as someone with ASD.
You sure you're not autistic?
Thank you, Olivia! 🙏 Watching your videos makes me feel like I am not alone or crazy. I am great at masking but over the past few years it's become harder and harder. I believe I am at a burnout stage (I am 49. That's a lot of masking!). Your videos are a great help and I have decided to get an official diagnosis. Keep up the amazing work you are doing to spread awareness about autism! 👏👏👏
Thank you so much for your extremely kind comment, Tanya! I'm so glad my videos could help you. It also definitely sounds like you're going through burnout. This happened to me in high school. I could no longer mask or function at all. My advice would be to take a break, get some rest. Something so that your brain can try to heal itself a little before you go past the point of no return and can't function at all as I did. Best of luck on your diagnoses journey, and I'm here if you need anything! God Bless 💙
I've reached burnout too. I'm 39. Hang in there! ❤️
I have added the menopause to the mix…which is a lot of fun.
@@tracik1277 Tell me about it! I am premenopausal and riding the hormonal waves while experiencing autistic burnout must be one of the most challenging situations I have ever encountered. Now I not only get exhausted by social interactions, they down right irritate me! 😁 I basically want to be a hermit. 😂
Is this a shutdown? I was at a big stadium to enjoy a Spiritual Convention. The kids behind my seat wouldn't stop talking, eating or kicking my seat. I was 1. Already exhausted 2. feeling my social phobia kicking in plus I'm menopausal. I had to get up and leave and couldn't stop crying for hours. It felt like a panic attack but no racing heartbeat or feeling like I was dying. What I felt was so much anger and overly stimulated. I became embarrassed because I lost complete control of my emotions. I was never diagnosed but have ADD. Just curious if this feeling was what you describe??
I tend to get shutdowns before meltdowns where I really don't wanna talk, and it takes a lot of effort, and you get "mh's" and "uh huh's" out of me at most, and I get more and more irritable being expected to respond or interact. Generally, I just wanna be left alone and not have any demands placed upon me. If that doesn't happen, I start to get really snappy, lose control over the things I say, and at worst get really loud and raging, feeling as if my head is a noisy radio channel that is about to explode, and sometimes I will break down and cry after a bout of what feels like uncontrollable anger. I don't actually get shutdowns where I can't do anything, that only happens when I reach burnout, but I can usually still speak, depends with whom. What I've described is the private version, in public I have internal meltdowns where I feel like I'm about to explode but instead I implode, I get many inner visuals of slamming my head against things and screaming as loud as I can't but I don't, and I refrain from speaking to anybody as much as possible, unless something should set me off. So far so good though in public. Sounds like a lot of women experienced internalized meltdowns that feel like they just break you down from the inside, erode you. But the horror (shame) of losing it in public is just too great, because, well, no one would understand.
I get this in specific busy places. Like Christmas fairs, or malls during holiday seasons. Or even amusement parks. The mixture of the sensory overwhelm, the crowds, having to keep walking as the flow of people goes, and having to walk against people while holding bags or a coat.. and the heat. I am a very chatty person and in these situations I shut down. I've even fainted once when I was pregnant. It's awful.
You have no idea how much you’re videos have been helping me since I found your channel last year. The way you explain everything helps me understand myself better and it helps my family understand me as well. Thank you so so much Olivia! God Bless!!! 💗
Usually I just start yawning a lot and can't make decisions. That's why grocery shopping is difficult too much stimulation to get your attention and the decisions you have to make. Yesterday my head was pulsating as I left the store.
I am very prone to shutdowns. I almost never have meltdowns, but shutdowns are fairly common. It could be because I also have dissociative disorder associated with PTSD, possibly. Thank you for doing these videos. You are far braver than I am!.
You are incredibly brave, Mimi. Don't ever think otherwise! You clearly have battled some tough things, but are still here and made it through! You got this 💪🏻
You look beautiful!! I'm so glad to have another female to relate to. All the things that have caused so many shutdowns over the yrs could have been so easily avoided diagnosed earlier.
First, thank you so much for your sweet comment! This was a new look and I wasn't sure it looked good lol. But I'm so sorry you had to deal with all of this stuff too. As you said, it could have all been avoided had we been diagnosed earlier. This is why I make these videos, so other young girls can get diagnosed and don't have to go through the same stuff we did.
All this stuff we’ve been struggling with forever…and we are finally, Finally, Valid. ❤
❤
You should mention your business in your videos. I didnt know about it until I read your description below the video. Get the word out
Aw thanks so much for suggesting this, Olga!
When I get overwhelmed, if I get to the point where I start crying, I actually go into a fugue state & get amnesia, the next day i won't remember crying or what i cried about. The meltdown totally wiped me out, then I pass out. And I black out, I just know it happened bcuz I wake with puffy red eyes, my face swollen, my body sore from tensing up, then I have to piece bits & pieces together. Then I feel shame & embarrassment and it paralyzed me for days
Thank you for sharing your experiences with autistic shutdowns with us!!! I personally only get meltdowns but this was very interesting
That's how I get sometimes - I've had to explain it as needing to 'reboot'. I'm pretty much catatonic during them. I've noticed that I can force myself out of them and to continue to mask but if I do the resulting meltdown is virtually inevitable and much worse than it would otherwise be.
Thank you Olivia, so validating ! 😌
Thanks for sharing this! I find that I extremely rarely experience meltdowns (at least as an adult, I don't honestly remember whether or not I had them as a child), but I frequently experience shutdowns. So many of my autistic symptoms are internal rather than external, so I never thought I might be autistic until late 2023 (at 36 years old). I had looked into it a bit before that, wondering if it might be possible, but because a lot of what I was reading talked more about external cues than internal ones, I dismissed the possibility. It wasn't until watching videos about adult women with ADHD (which I also have) who were also autistic that things finally started to click. So thank you again for sharing your experiences and your research, because it really is invaluable for someone like me.
Ive had freeze shut downs before where i shut people out for months
Have experienced shut downs my whole life,, only got diag in 2019. Thanks for an absolutely perfect description!
Olivia, this is excellent, and your great work is very much appreciated!
I’m so happy that you’re posting more videos lately! You have helped me understand my recently diagnosed 16 yr old daughter in ways that no book or professional ever would have. Thank you, thank you, thank you Olivia!! 🙏🏻
Your clothes, make-up and hair are awesome in this video, you look so lovely with that lipstick, your skin tone and everything you had put on made you like a princess. Thank you for sharing your experience.
I sometimes get what I call "anxiety overload." One time i had to go to the dentist and I was so anxious. By the end I was feeling dizzy and couldnt speak properly. The dentist was talking to me and asking me things and I could barely answer! I felt so embarassed, they probably thought I was really stupid and strange 😫
The best way I can describe my shutdowns is it feels like my head and my body are not connected. I can’t talk or move. This lasts for between an hour and three hours. It normally ends when I start noticing some physical sensation like an itch. It’s really difficult to move and my limbs still feel really heavy, but eventually I’m able to scratch the itch. I’m usually physically exhausted for the rest of the day but no longer emotionally exhausted.
So interesting, Harriet. Great way to describe it. Thanks for sharing your experience with me :)
(suspecting autism but I'm not diagnosed) I became so overwhelmed while repeatedly recording takes for a piano performance during lockdown that i reached a point i couldn't even speak in order to introduce my pieces anymore.
Also whenever I come home after school or going out to the mall I get a terrible headache and just need a rest/sleep so bad. Just listening to people's voices becomes grating and certain smells also trigger bad headaches - argh!
I'm so glad I found you! Not only are u open and genuine, but yoy are so charming and adorable to listen to.
I have a question for ya. What do you eat? My 19 old daughter eats no meat. She is pretty malnutrition. Shd has an apt next week to try to get the ball rolling with diagnosis and tests for ADD and autism. Do you have say advice? I just don't want her to fall through the cracks. Thanks for putting yourself out there. I really appreciate you!
I’ve been In a perpetual state of shutdown since I started working full time two years ago. And before that, I experience them pretty much everyday when living at my parents with my nieces. I had to stay in my room, now my apartment, unless I need to go to work. And work is brutal for my senses and social interaction, and I can’t anymore. I’ll be going back to part time soon.
Meltdowns are waaaay too embarrassing. I escape and shut down.
it has to be exhausting having autism! Thank you; again, for the info
Well, i can only speak for myself but i also enjoy being autistic a lot. I notice so many things many people don't. My brain is its own source of entertainment. I am very VERY independent. My brain can make the smartest, most intelligent and funniest associations. I'm not afraid to go against the majority since I have always felt a bit 'different'so standing up for something comes easy to me. And I'm at an age where i don't worry too much what other people think and also know myself quite well. So if I had the choice I wouldn't trade in my brain. 😊❤
Thank you so much for your posts! They are very helpful 💗
for me i get shutdowns the most when i get decision fatigue, which is really easy for me bc i just want shit to be done i hate indecisiveness it feels like a waste of time to me. I want straightforward
like when im in a particularly bad mood someone asking me what i want to eat might even trigger it but my life is wack rn so im ultra sensitive LMAO
So interested you said that because I cannot make a decision to save my life. It's brutal! I was wondering if I was the only one. You have inspired me to do a video on this. Thanks for sharing!
The fact that you were already at a crowded fair all day before you shut down tells me im much more deep on the scale than I thought.
@Pateck Aaron thankyou i screen shot that. I've come far on my own im determined to keep improving and reducing my issues and helping others
I don’t know if this was a shutdown, but I remember a couple years ago on my birthday, my boyfriend wanted to throw me a small surprise party.. at a mall. With a few friends. The problem with that was I was going through a stressful period in my career and I wasn’t really in the mood to socialize. So I quickly became irritated when I found out, and I just shutdown I guess? I couldn’t make myself talk to anybody. If I did, it was a few short words, which I later realized was a little rude. I was sorry after. My bf didn’t throw me another surprise after that. He was upset at first but he understood when I explained.
I think ive noticed this consciously i received diagnosis report and dotn get me wrong im thrilled but at first i was like daydreaming or half in shock and felt like i wasn't thinking at all or feeling in the moment
Thank you. I didn't know what it was then. What you said happened to me once. I felt trapped in my body and couldn't move. It was strange and scary
Thank you so much for doing this video.
Of course! I hope it was helpful for you :) Thanks for watching!
Yes very helpful. Also loving your fabulous look with the curls, red lips, and polka dots. Super cute.
People used to ask me if I had borderline personality disorder, and I used to tell them I was just shutting down to recover my emotional energy. I’ve had more shutdowns than meltdowns, though some of my shutdowns happen because I fight a meltdown too hard. The cycle is exhausting!
thank you so much for sharing.
Thank you so much!! 👍👍❤️❤️‼️
I relate to no batteries in brain. Waiting for official testing 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💞👊 Thanks
I had one of these last night after my fiance told me about new plans for the evening. I felt so guilty the whole time because I didn't want him to think it was his fault.
Great information. You look fabulous!
Aw thanks so much, Vivian! Your comments are always so sweet 💙 I appreciate them all!
Sure thing. 😊
I mostly only get shutdowns but it’s like your brain and body just give out. Makes it hard to get anything done even afterwards
This was a very nice video! Thank you for sharing about autistic meltdowns, and your experiences with them. Pretty relatable, since I am also on the spectrum. Always enjoy your content:)
This gives me great insight on what a shutdown is. Ty for Sharing 💗
I do have a question...when you are in public, how do you handle meltdowns?
So glad it could give you insight! So, I've never actually had a full on meltdown in public. I've always been able to hold off until I was somewhere private (even in a public bathroom). When I feel one coming on, I try to get somewhere quiet and private. I'll try to listen to music to calm me down as well.
Olivia, did you ever get shutdowns from being tired or stressed at your job?
So me!! However, I have more shutdowns than meltdowns.
Just having dinner w my family. If everyone is talking at same time. I’ve made dinner after a work day. Tired. I can feel it happening at the table. My lovely family is all talking at once and before long I’m done.
Thanks for doing these videos! Can you please explain what is the difference, if at all, between autism shutdown and autism burnt out? Thanks 😊
Just saw your tap video (I started ballet a couple of months ago). Please do tap dancing videos. Thank you!!
Yes this is it. Exactly thank you. I get parlized can't use muscles words anything.
I think i having a shutdown right now but not sure gott my diagnos 2016 so this is still werry new to me meltdown s i have had all my life its quit comon but att the moment im down, dont wanna talk, mody, no energy and so on but yea I cant completely shut down i have things to do but im so draind after T.T right and my bad thoughs ramp up big time
Sometimes when I get shutdowns either I would probably feel extremely
exhausted or irritated but most of the time when I shut down
I would cry because I don't understand
I was diagnosed with Autism at the age of three by a doctor
but I'm not sure what kind of doctor
I get shutdowns more often. But either way, even a meltdown is super exhausting. Had one yesterday, though (meltdown). Lasted a long time. First time in months for that. Shutdowns are like every week however
That place in my head where there’s no speech. No words can be uttered, just can’t do it.
Especially awesome look in this one
I‘ve been experiencing this regularly during group therapy lately. Needing days afterwards to recover and then not wanting to say anything in group therapy the week after that because I don‘t wanna experience another shutdown. My therapist „does not see any signs of autism in me at all“ so he just sees this as being stubborn and noncompliant. I feel stuck and don‘t know where to go with this …
Spacing out? Could it be described as spacing out? I do this a lot. Sometimes while people are talking to me.
I'm not officially diagnosed. I'm calling tomorrow to make the appointment. My bf doesn't think I have autism.
"Playing football in high school" EXCUSE ME?! Queen!!
Yppppp, your 💯 correct Olivia.
My granddaughter has meltdowns as opposed to shutdowns.Thankyoufor your insight into autism😊
@Pateck Aaron I wouldnt want to “save” my granddaughter from her autism,I love her as she is.She is no less a person because she has autism and you cant make autism disappear with herbs🙄
Ohhhhh this would be when my daughter with autism can't make a decision or answer a very simple question like when I ask if I can get her a drink, and she answers I DONT KNOW.
Oh my gosh thanks for this explanation (100% relate). Btw, such a lovely and cool hair/make/style! :) I'm waiting for autism evaluation, and this is one of the things that I think colleagues might notice and wonder about, and I need a diagnosis to be able to explain.
I work in research and if I need to cooperate with others for days/weeks, shutdowns are almost inevitable from the exhaustion. Social skills drop and I cant mask anything. I become quiet, and sometimes can't find words to answer people because my brain can't function to find words... so I find myself just silent or stuttering something that doesnt come out the way I want. And I just have to get away because if it goes on a meltdown isnt far off as the frustration rises from not being able to talk. Could this be selective mutism? I just recently realised that it perhaps could be that :o
First, thanks so much for the comment on my hair style! It was a new look and I wasn't sure it looked good lol.
But yes, this absolutely could be selective mutism. Something I would recommend setting up with your work/coworkers is a system to help you and them when you're going through a shutdown/selective mutism. Can you type or text or write during your shutdowns? If so, you could signal to your throat that you can't talk, and they would then in turn understand what was going on and could get you a computer or piece of paper to be able to communicate with them.
@@OliviaHops It suites you well imo! Its brave to dare to try something new, and you also inspire others to dare try out new styles and wear it proudly!
Thank you for the very good and honest advice! I never really thought about the possibility of being open about it. Young academics are very scared of showing "weakness" early in our carreers. But even professors have them, and thers will also inevitably show when working together.
So, no matter the reason (mutism or not) the esaiest way to avoid being anxious might be to just be open about it (and find alternative ways to communicate, like you said) :) Thanks again!!
I experience this a lot but for me it's often triggered in social settings. I'm just not built for this world.
Do you have any senses that are more "sensitive" than others? For me it's mostly sounds and tactile sensations I'm very sensitive to
Sound and smells are the most sensitive to me. They're all sensitive, but those ones are definitely the most debilitating.
When I get super overwhelmed I actually will feel physically ill, it's like everyone's (and the whole world, really) is yelling and it hurts my ears. I will feel headachey and nauseated. I can talk, but my words get mixed up and I start tuning out and just wanting to escape and be by myself. I just thought it was my adhd.
I have a few old head injuries, 1 quite major one, that really bugs me and definitely adds to irritability sometimes.
Oh gosh, so sorry to hear that! That's awful.
@@OliviaHops thanks for caring 🙂
I have both AUTISM and Adhd Sometimes I get overwhelmed and frustrated Sometimes I just want to shunt down I live in group home with different women one women is mentally unstable, one women just stands as in a trance moving her hands like a spider they sometimes pace back and forth its drives me insane between the one who is mentally unstable and the women who stands as if they are in a trance moving their hands like a spider. I have meltdowns or I shunt down.
i cannot w how gorgeous you arreeee ilysm
And thank you for this sweet comment. It made my day! This was a new look and I wasn't sure it turned out good lol
Had one today. I feel like life has been sucked out of me.
Thank you
This so describes something that happens to me every so often. It sucks
Sorry this happens to you too Sydney.
My daughter definitely experiences selective mutism. I was wondering if you experience any OCD tendencies?
Yes! I absolutely do. Though I’ve never been diagnosed. I’ve honestly never really talked to a doctor/therapist about this.
@@OliviaHops if I find out anything helpful, I will let you know. I’m still in the investigating stage. My daughter’s behavior stem from a a benign tumor in her bladder a few years ago. It changes over time, and the severity fluctuates.
What can be done to make it better at the end of the day.
Been shut down 3-4 years now. No one helping me. Lockdowns didn't help much because I didn't even need to go through the motions
I think I have something a lot like a shutdown, but I'm not sure that's what it is. There's a few versions or "subtypes" of whatever it is.
One tends to be very, very short, but I'm starey and not at all taking in what's happening. I often stop breathing for a moment, too. I think this one tends to be my tiredness making me be overstimulated from something that's normally fine, like watching youtube. Or it's happened in class, in which case idk the logic behind when it does or doesn't happen
Another is that my brain is just lagging behind and I can't do or understand things that I do just fine the next day. This one tends to be the very, very very irritable, I can't deal with anything type. There's not enough space in my brain and I can't filter out things like my sister humming waaay less then usual, and i'm already a little bad at doing that. This happens mostly when I'm doing homework
The last one I can think of right now is one I've only noticed recently. It's when I can't focus because lots of little noises and coversations around me just take up too much space. This one has some of the staring that the first one does.
Oh and I have little (and very uncommon) mini-freezes, like when a teacher was trying to call me over and my brain just stopped. Maybe 30 seconds at the longest, less most of the time?
Autism is a crystal starseed in disguise 😇💙🌈🌌🦋💎🕯️✨🧙
I had a shutdown at work today and got griped at.
Shutdowns are the worst! Can experience them for weeks at a time, worse in winter. Hoping Wellbutrin can pull me out of it
Omg. I was just thinking on the train the other day - because I was trying to figure out what was wrong with me - I was in safe mode like on a computer 😅
Would meltdown = fight mode and a shutdown = flight mode?
Hey! this sounds similar to what happens to me. I know I have major depression. I need to take naps often, low energy generally every day. I'm not sure if this is related to my depression. what do you think? I have thought that I was on the spectrum but it hasn't been confirmed. I noticed some of the symptoms are the same because I also get irritated but that's also part of depression haha idk
Usually when I shut down, I just fall asleep for the day.
Where are we supposed to get help?
You are ✅️ on 👉, Olivia.
I believe shutdowns are what I experience. I'm not sure I've ever had a full meltdown
Do shutdowns last a few days? Mime seem to and people keep thinking it's bipolar bit it's just my body can't do anymore. My brain can't take anything jn. My feelings towards people diminish and I just want to sit alone in a room for days with no noise.
I've heard people say they can. I know someone whose shutdowns can last a week or more if they don't take the time to reset.
I just learned thanks to you... That all those experiences i had were autistic shutdowns. Feels good to have an actual name for it. But now that i know what it is, i also know that i'm kinda stuck with it -_-
i'm really low functioning at the moment. And trying to figure out what works. It helps knowing that this is something i should be aware of and plan around because obviously i want to avoid it *but not avoid every new or valuable experience because of it*.
Thank you and you played football. A girl after my own heart I would play basket ball in a dress and think nothing of it. I was a tomboy but still was girly too...lol.