How Do I Control My Emotional Spending?
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- Опубліковано 3 жов 2024
- How Do I Control My Emotional Spending?
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Important for people to realize it's not always a lack of knowledge in finances that leads to issues. Sometimes it's an emotional or mental problem.
Yes! Although I believe she could benefit from standard therapy, I was happy to find out that financial therapy is a real thing! Emotional spending is tied to so many wounds.
Facts.
In fact I would say most of the time. We know the simple commonsense things to do in most cases, it's the will and stability to do it in most cases we lack.
Yeah. I have bipolar and adhd, and impulse spending is a big part of both disorders. I know to budget, save, avoid debt etc. but it’s so much harder due to my mental disorders. Still not gonna give up on controlling my impulses, but I’m glad Dave acknowledges this
I didn’t realize that’s what i was dealing with for years on end. I am finally free from those mental issues. And i’m finally saving more money than i used to
“Spending is a socially acceptable drug” ~Dave Ramsey. WOW 😳😩. This episode really resonated with me. Confirmed some things I already knew. It’s time to do the work!
In the same boat.
$100,000 dollars in 10 months is a big step. Make sure to celebrate the wins too.
David Liang - College Grad Finance this!
She has such a great attitude. A true fighter. Fight on ma'am. Fight on.
Most people would completely buckle under her circumstances. I sure would, she’s really strong.
No most normal people would stop trying to get pregnant. She obviously has reproduction issues hence Ivf. It seems selfish not strong.
I would have given up. It must have been a testament to her strength that she kept trying. But at some point she needed to just stop.
@@garyhost1830 To each their own.
Maybe the couple should consider helping children in need, instead of continually trying to get pregnant. They are setting themselves up for heartbreak. Praying that they will have wisdom and seek God's will. Some things can't be forced.
@@annmarie2964 I agree why not adopt? Or just learn to live whiteout having children it’s not the key to happiness.
It is good she realizes the "why" of the spending. So sorry for the unbelievable loss.
Recognizing you have a problem truly is 90% of the solution. Good luck Corrin, we're all pulling for you
The guy in red shirt is right. She needs to grieve the losses that she have had. She already has the introspection and awareness, and grieving I believe will help her ease from the sadness. I am rooting for this woman to recover and be a much better and happier person.
Probably more often than not
The guy in the red shirt is John Delony
My heart goes out to her and her husband
John, as always, is so gentle with this lady.
I'm speechless but luckily Dave and company know what say at the right time
My heart is with you tonight, dear mama.
This is tough. Thankfully she acknowledged the hurt rather than try to focus solely on healing it. A quote from R.H. Sin said “let it hurt and let it go”. It’s OK and healthy to acknowledge that you are hurt and it’s OK to carry on the memory but eventually all things do heal. I hope that she is able to conceive one day and heal both emotionally and financially.
Wow, I can't even imagine. I lost 1 baby it was the worst thing I've ever been through. Idk how anyone could live through it 7 times! Very strong couple to stay together.
Emotional Intelligence 2.0 is a great book about how to manage emotions.
Episodes like these prove that dave aint just a ranting old man. The man has spiritual n wordly wisdom. What a great combo to hv . Respect u tonnes dave uncle
My heart breaks for her and her husband!
Celebrate how far you’ve come and grieve your lows properly. You guys have done so awesome on the cleaning up part. SO AWESOME!!
I struggle tremendously with this problem as well. Thank you Corrin for being brave enough to make this call
There is an underlying issue that needs to be addressed, spending is just an outward reaction to what’s going on inside. Please get help
We spend more than when we feel less then and escape from our feelings. The good thing is that she sounds very self-aware and sees that she’s doing this.
Agree she is more self aware. The next step is Financial Therapy (yup it’s a real thing) for healthy behaviors, or basic therapy. Professional help is needed at this stage.
She just told us why.
My heart❤ REALLY goes out to her. 😢
Retail therapy = grief spending.
I did it when my father died. Bought things I never even opened or took the tags off of. Just shopped to try to feel better for a while.
@@msims1081 Sorry for your loss.
They both hath very kind, sensitive, thoughtful, wise approaches in their response to her💓
I really respect these guys even more. They show a lot of compassion and understanding.
I'm in Minnesota... And I just blew $240 on stuff I didn't need because I'm stressed out of my mind.
Try and return it, because now you realize this. I was there too and I'm just trying to get out of debt. It sucks because stress causes so many negative situations but we have to learn to manage it and know that we hold the control. Please don't let stress win you've got this.
I can relate. Pray, meditate & listen to, 'The BEST is Yet to Come' by Frank Sinatra. ❤
I'm a fellow Minnesotan spendthrift. I'm 65 and it's been one bad financial decision after another. Trying to change this behavior, get out of debt and save. It's no excuse, but childhood trauma, abuse and growing up on welfare, contributed to my adult mindset and destructive financial habits.
Exactly what happened to us. We got out of debt in 2017 and saved so much money. My son was also born in 2017, after fertility treatment. The following years were babies lost a 3months pregnant, thousands on fertility treatment, and a lot spent on spending to cover grief. So extremely painful to go through, and the money problems at the same time only made it worse. Finally back on the right track.
Hi, Sorry to hear about the pain you went through. I am Shruti, student at Thomas Jefferson University currently working on my thesis project focused on impulse buying triggered by negative emotions and I feel I can learn a lot from you. Please let me know if we can talk for 30 minutes. I am doing research to find out ways to help people going through emotional spending. Thank you
@@shruti27raghav thatd be fine
Why am I just finding all this out now. Just makes sense and ads up. Flipping amazing thank you very much
Tough story. Honestly couldn’t even imagine.
"Spending is a socially acceptable drug."
- Dave Ramsey
Context: Grief spending, emotional spending.
This is so, so sad 😞
The first step is to admit you have a problem.
I need help with emotional spending too. I have bipolar disorder which compounds it. I transferred from overeating too overspending.I've lost 80 pounds, but I gained about $9,000 of debt. I've tried 3 different No-Buys and failed at each of them.
I’m an emotional eater/food addict in recovery. Getting at the underlying trauma (a lot of spiritual work there) and recognizing the ppl and situations that trigger me (a lot of emotional work there) have both been SUPER helpful.
People tend to spend more when they feel empty in order to fill a void. With 7 losses, that’s a heavy load of emptiness and I can only imagine her pain. She is aware of the behavior so that’s good. And I pray they go to therapy to conquer this together and hope one day they can be blessed with a child I know they are praying for.
Going through separation and divorce or any kind of emotional trauma can lead to the same kind of behavior, it’s not “transfer behavior”, more like compensating
What a poor soul. I hope she’s able to heal and succeed in her goal
I don’t usually like Dave’s content, but this is helpful and relatable.
I went through a period of emotional spending, and regret it every day, but I’m actively working to change.
420 days sober from impulse spending.
Hi, I am Shruti, student at Thomas Jefferson University currently working on my thesis project focused on impulse buying triggered by negative emotions and I feel I can learn a lot from you. Please let me know if we can talk for 30 minutes. I am doing research to find out ways to help people going through emotional spending. Thank you
She’s really self aware !!
What a great response by Dr. John Delony- my God, that was world class advice! 👏
That must be a comment from Dr. John’s secret account.
Watching in from the UK ,after I left college and begun working full time I was subject to heavy financial abuse from my mum and my boss ( they were friends) , when I got paid my boss at the time would send my wages to my mum and I never saw them I practically had to beg and explain myself for every penny I wanted ( I did not live with my parents) so when I finally began to recieve my wages after quitting that job my mind is in the constant loop of having to spend every penny before it's taken from me and after 4 years of the abuse I am really struggling to get back to my old self with money i worked part time through college and I was incredible at budgeting by 17 i had more money in my account than both my parents i brought everything i wanted in cash but I struggle to do this now
I do something similar, my entire life was dealing with chronic illness, now every time I have money I feel the need to spend it all, and on things to make me feel good and to clean the house because I just want to feel good after so many years of suffering, so hard to stop myself
Hi Kristen,
I am graduate student working on my thesis project which is about impulse buying behavior triggered due to stress, anxiety, sadness, etc... Currently I am focusing on doing research by talking to people who faced the situation and going through it, so that I can understand the issue and try to look for solutions which can help. Please reply if you have some time to talk about this issue. Thank you
It’s so hard to control emotion especially with the negative thoughts and feelings :( I used to smoke and drink then I started meditation and also thinking about caramel bread when I’m stuck with negativity. It kinda helps. I mean at least I stopped drinking and smoking.
One suggestion would be to create a budget, and stick to it. Another suggestion would be to create a new behavior, such as going out for a walk, when you feel the need to spend money.
Thanks guys, I am always put under pressure emotionally by my family causes me to spend unnecessarily.
We have tried for six years to get pregnant now, two IVF failed cycles, 10 IUI failed cycles and two losses. The hurt is life changing 😔 don’t wish this on my worst enemy. I will keep her in my prayers, I understand her pain so well.
TaniaC - my god bless you, prayers. We just had our rainbow granddaughter in March. Not sure how you kids do it, heart breaking. Our daughter and son in law, 5 years of tubal pregnancy, miscarriages, Ivf, uterine surgery and thousands in drugs.❤️
@@moneyisweird7862 we are still trying, this time with Embryo adoption.
@@cindymae3656 WE hold on to hope, the only way to press on and continue. congrats on your granddaughter
I did some emotional spending recently to the tune of a 2013 Camaro. Double pinstripe with a moon roof! The condition, mileage and price were more than great as a combination. Was it a vanity purchase? Yes. Did I pay for it in cash because I drove hoopdies for years? 100%. Now I'm thinking of going back to school for finance because I've paid off all my student loans from the previous degree(before the Camaro). Through the lessons I've learned during that journey of paying off debt, I discovered this whole world of finance and money management, I feel far more passionate and excited to do that kind of work as opposed to what my original degree was for. Funny how life works.
I feel terrible for her. I have the same issue, different situation but same issue. I think I spend to comfort myself while not dealing with grief/stress/emotions, I don't know how to get on the right track. Our house is filled, I'd even say cluttered with stuff I did not need to buy and won't ever use. I get very into hobbies then spend a ton of money on that hobby for a few weeks or a few months then completely drop it and move onto the next hobby. My wife and I are now in a pathetic situation where she spends just to even out what I spent out of spite and I turn around and do the same. I don't know how to break this cycle.
Therapy helps!
That is a question I had. After losing everything in a fire I went to spending.
This is why people fight over money when some one dies.
Confront the feelings that accompany your emotional spending. ...
Identify your emotional spending triggers. ...
Unsubscribe from mailing lists. ...
Set a budget for unnecessary purchases. ...
Leave your credit card at home when you shop. ...
Don't save your credit card information on
Corrin you are a fighter! All the best in your life's journey
I hope the husband is getting support as well.
I’m in the same boat. 62 years old. I am having a hard time not shopping. I know I have an issue. Just need help to stop. Thanks
How do I control my emotional spending? Don't spend emotionally. Anytime you tie money and emotions together you are asking for trouble. It doesn't matter what your personal situation is. Her grief is certainly just but emotions should always be kept out money matters. Money is simply numbers on a piece of paper. Deal with emotions in the correct realm.
@My Love well, the hardest part is seeing it as a “choice” that you have full control over. You probably wouldn’t have any interest in my system of personal finance but it is even more stringent than Dave’s.
Counseling would be a good option
I can't imagine going through that, my heart would be so broken I don't know if I would get past that. Especially if I didn't have a baby in the end of all that. Poor woman and her husband as well.
SEVEN failed fertility treatments on top of the miscarriages? At what point does a doctor stop taking her money and just say "sweetie, you can't carry a child". It's devastating, I'm sure, but her body and heart have gone through so much trauma that I can't imagine a doctor allowing it to continue.
Seems highly unethical.
Yeah I never understood this. There's no use of having a child if it kills you in the process.
Budgeting..
Thank you so much!
I think that would help me a lot, talking to someone about how I feel like I never got to live my life because of my illness
To each their own. At least for people with b.p.d. & very wide voids, getting counselor is much more a waste of $ than not, and can very much cause more heartache. Even if they're good & actually listen. To each their own, idc what I've gone thru & keep being a victim, I Will Not allow it to be my main identity. Be your own hero, or find a dependable one. Becoming dependent is always a gamble
Hey Corrin, I pray that God will bless you with full-term babies in Jesus name! Don't lose hope! x
I have several misdemeanors on my background I want to be a nurse and I just want to have a good job that I like what should I do ??!
Stop breaking the law
when i worked collections almost all the people had health issues...poverty leads to health issues which leads to more poverty
I’m the same way, but with eating.
There’s only one use for money. That’s spending it.
Now I dont have the guts this lady has. No way in the world was I trying so many times to get pregnant. After the first or second miscarriages im done done
She is so strong. Not many people can do what she did
I am baffled as to why she didn’t consider adoption? Lots of sweet kids need loving moms.
Maybe they did consider it, but then decided it wasn’t the right choice for them.
Adoption doesn’t cure infertility
@@sassy7girls no one said it does. Maybe she's grieving the loss of the lives and infertility.
Maybe she’s trying to heal from loss. Hard to think about anything else during loss.
Expensive, and part of the issue is mental issues of not biological being capable of it. The "mabey I am not ment to be a mother" is very bad. In the end once she gets over that adoption can be a great option. Many churches help Lower middle class couples that can't have kids, but can afford them, go through the Expensive adoption; that may be the best option for them.
My aunt passed away and left me some money it has been a month and I spent it. At first I had this horrible guilt of using it but when my phone broke I decided to get a new one. Once that was done I started hyper focusing on cute anime merch cute desk decor I redid my whole room moved everything around but the desk bothers me. So I went online and I spent almost all of the money on decor and anime figures. I feel awful now why am I so stupid why did I waste this money. My brother saved his for a drivers license something he can use and I spent mine in dumb ish.
Its tough but it sounds like she may not be meant yo have kids.. bow about adopting?
I have a problem spending. I spend based on emotional feelings. I need help. I do not want to do this anymore as it is affecting my husband, my kids and more than anything myself because I do not want to keep spending money i don’t have.
Hi, I am Shruti, student at Thomas Jefferson University currently working on my thesis project focused on impulse buying triggered by negative emotions and I feel I can learn a lot from you. Please let me know if we can talk for 30 minutes. I am doing research to find out ways to help people going through emotional spending. Thank you
Not the loss of pregnancy but the loss of a child
She needs a grief counselor and maybe let her spouse take over the finances completely until she is well enough to spend wisely.
She’ll get better soon. This is interesting to add in my upcoming VIDS. 😇
Putting the shame in shameless plug?
I'm not sure how spending money makes it better
Just stop buying things you don't need
I have terrible emotional spending.
I see the prices of things and I get angry and refuse to buy it
haha
Literally 3 hours today looking at computers -- every single time: Thats too much! There *has* to be a better option >:0
I saw ramsey yesterday at wal mart with a black amex card 🧐
Hahaha no you didn’t
Pics or it didn't happen
😂🤣
Why was Gordon Ramsey at Walmart?
Some bank debit cards say Visa so other peoples bank debit card may have American Express
during pandemic I can spend more on doordash
Seven miscarriages? Jesus. This woman is made of steel.
“Sell the car.”
Oh wow she def needs a grief counselor
Dr. John to me always sounds like a person pretending to be a therapist
Wow
Can someone do a budget video with Dominique Sachse. Thanks.
It’s a difficult one to stop shopping but I go for good prices
It's really a dopamine problem
Why Doesn’t she just adopt
Simple. By starting a side hustle like starting a UA-cam channel. By doing this, you will be too busy to spend on anything and on top of that you even make more money.
Maybe she should spend on a surrogate 💁
Why on Earth is she calling Dave Ramsey about this? She openly admits she has a spending problem due to emotional grief that's a textbook therapist issue. Dave is not a therapist people need to get this through their stupid heads.
Am I the only one that thinks it's either a genetical mismatch, either her husband is causing all her miscarriages?
Surely after 2-3 miscarriages she would have gone to do the doctor and find out the cause
I wonder how this lady and her husband are doing today. Hope she got the therapy she needs.
Basically get therapy…ok cool. Dial 211 if you need help finding therapy and other Resources
Bio identical progesterone can help with miscarriages 😥 find a NaPro doctor 🙏
2nd stimulus check coming soon
Lol so Americans can keep buying big sizes flat screens lol Haha 😆
I pray the Lord gives them a baby, in the name of Jesus. I can't even imagine how she must feel. 💔😔
Not everyone gets to have a baby, we can wish it for them. But we have not control, I wish/hope she finds peace, whatever that entails. X
And her husband had to pay off what she spent 😂 haha, women
How can these people claim to be Christians? The only answer is God. It's that easy. All this garbage about "guilt" and "habitual behaviors"... jus repent, sweetie.
Dave Ramsey is so rich he tried to sell his soul to Satan but Satan couldn’t afford it lol.
@Mike Li In early 2019 Dave sent a copy of FPU to the devil and in 2020 the devil spreads its generosity to the world 🌎