Queer Q&A: Signs She Likes You, Bicurious Girls, Dating Lesbians as a Trans Woman
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- Опубліковано 4 жов 2024
- We're back with another LGBTQ+ Ask Alexis and Lilian video!
We answer your questions about exploring your sexual orientation, queer dating, dating bicrious girls, dating lesbians as a trans woman and more.
How to overcome internalized homophobia: • How to Overcome Intern...
How to flirt with a girl over text: • How to Flirt With a Gi...
8 Signs She Likes You: • 8 Signs A Girl Likes Y...
Leave your questions in the comments so we can answer them in our next video :)
Love,
A + L
/ one99four
/ lilianbrilliant_
Hey friends! Once again, please leave your questions for us and any own advice you have on these in the comments! Thank you 💕
Hey there. I subscribe to ur vids. UA-cam isn't sending them out.
I unsubsidized & resubscribed.
Still I'm not getting ur vids, any suggestions?
Hi!
I have a question but also a long story which i' m really sorry for. You two seem so sweet and i' m really crying hard now because i want what you have.
Please don't t be shocked or overwhelmed by what i' m about to say, and if this is too much, too long, don' t continue. You don't need to do this.
And i don' t expect you to believe me, this Will sound made up, by a sad person looking for attention. Which i am, but everything i write here is true.
Two months ago i picked out a new name for myself.
I' m 38, was born looking like a boy. Sadly. Knew my whole life i was a girl but i grew up in a... let's s say 'an unsupportive environment'.
But in reality, conservative, lonely and violent. I raised myself, in front of the tv, watching American films and shows.
I live in Belgium, the Dutch speaking part but i think in and prefer speaking English.
I ❤ cats and i play like them, in private with open minded people..
So you can probably already guess people find me weird when they first meet me.
Now this:
I' ve been (recently!) diagnosed with ASS (autism spectrum disorder), ADHD, OCD, C-PTSD... And i' m An Army veteran. Mech. Infantry.
A whole life of extreme sports, love for danger, riding and racing motorcycles,( my record is 250km/h on a farm/dirt road on a Suzuki tl1000s 2 years ago but only because she wouldn' t go faster.) left me with chronic pain and braindamage. I forget a lot.
Now i have finally come out as a Trans woman, i still look like a man... But for our community i walk around in public as a woman. I' m here, i' m queer, get used to it...
Very scary at first, and i have been shot at... Flew through the air hundreds of times, had to fight for my life, like in a fistfight, being outnumbered.
This is the scariest thing ever.
So with my past, i am permanently scarred, physically, mentally, emotionally.
I ❤ women.
How will i ever find a woman who will accept me?
The last 7 years i' ve been alone, with the occasional flirt but they saw me as a strong and tall man, that's also caring, sweet, loves to listen, cuddle, cook, clean, is good with their kids. I really try hard to be a good, reliable, supportive partner.
But how will i ever find a bi, lesbian, pansexual woman or trans woman?
I met a great lesbian woman in a psychiatric hospital (University hospital in Ghent) earlier this year.
I loved her from the first moment i saw her. Like in the movies. She' s also autistic and loves working out, like me.
Sadly she has a very painful physical problem which even prevents her from sleeping.
I cared for her, for 2 months, at one point she was crying in pain, i was holding her hand, also crying, trying to comfort her. DESPERATELY looking for help and the nightnurse refused to call a doctor and told me to 'go to my room'. Yeah right.
I told that nurse i would go through a locked, fireproof, re-inforced door if she didn' t call a doctor, and would go find one myself. The emergency room was maybe 150 metres away.
All they did was give over the phone permission for a 'medium' painkiller, that only gave her a few hours of relief and maybe some sleep.
When i left the hospital, i asked for her number and she declined, with valid reasons. But i don' t think i can ever love again.
How can a woman like me ever find love?
@AlexisLilian ,i need to connect to a sweet and loving sis
I think we need a "how to tell if a shy girl is into you" video.
Yes pls
Exactly what I need
Alexis looks like a 70´s hot mom 🥵
My first thought was “I love your hair, and want the same haircut” 😂
We need a “how to flirt if you’re shy” video!!! Love from Italy❤️
Exactly the video I needed! Thank you so much for this one!✨💖
Hair looks awesome!!
Your hair looks fantastic.
This advice is very helpful thank you for sharing this with us. 🧡
I am wondering how you handle hate/negativity from religious people? My family are very strict Christians and even though I have always been interested in women and decided that at least, for now, I am identifying as bi; I haven't told my family. Every time the subject of the LBGTQ community comes up, they are quick to say that these people are all going to hell. Sad and very hard for many people to deal with I'm sure. I know that I can never tell my family because of their attitude.
@@Yin-yang-247 :( That's so sad :(
😭 Jesusian here MoonFlowerFaerie and our Sovereign loves all creation and we humans are tasked to accept with agape especially people we don't understand or identify. We're all pink inside, if anyone is going down the poop chute it could be your fam 💁🏼♀️🌈😎✌🏼not you. Blessings sister, be well.
@@dawnreneegmail 💗
I was watching thinking, wow that name sounds like mine, than Alexis said the my last name, holy shit that's me!! Amazing and thank you for answering!! I'll definitely take your tips seriously, greetings from The Hague and enjoy your road trip!!🌿🌈🌱 Btw, where can I find the sapphic retreats you organise?
Alexis, your hair looks amazing!!!
I really need to go on one of your retreats in the future 🤩
Really appreciate the advice on whether or not girls are interested, as a guy willing to admit I don't always pick up on the signs and have been constantly looking for suggestions about it. I've usually found girls advice on this a little more helpful, any ongoing advice Will always be appreciated.
Always a pleasure! You two were my first for following and subscribing to and still my best! Love your wise words but always delivered with humour. I think both of your hairstyles looked particularly 👌🤌 in this vlog 😉🥰
If you are happy and satisfied in your relationship, why would you look for someone else - no matter if you're bicurious, hetero or whatever?
It's not tricky.
If she is into you, she will let you know.
If you're writing in and wondering to all hell, she's not.
That's all you need to know.
Alexis your curls are popping 🤙
Finally you guys are back 😁❤
any queer events in Italy?????? I was NOT able to find anything!!!
That would be a miracle!!! No acceptance in that country! My friend struggles to even find areas. 🥲🥲🥲
@@lucypugh8304 And in the meantime I saw an old male gay couple walking in the park in the centre of Milan holding hands. 10 years ago. Tons of LGBT ppl in Italy but maybe mostly in the big cities. Getting accepted in a village…fuhgeddaboudit.
sara: then you have to learn how to google. for instance 'milan queer events' - and you get a lot. same goes for other italian cities. of course bigger cities offer usually more than smaller ones and villages or more rural places might have nothing in this regard. another aspect is online dating ...
Currently dating a bicurious woman, and it’s definitely not for the weak. Personally, like they are saying if you’re looking for something more serious then a bicurious woman is not the route for you. I realize I like this woman more than I expected and now i have all this anxiety bc I don’t know I’m just a fun thing to do or I’m someone she’s going to take seriously. 0/10 i don’t recommend lol
Great video and, as always, wonderful advice!
perfect the hair ☀👍🏻👍🏻🗣💚💚
Thank you! Happy trails! 💖
My fav couple ❤️😍
Well
Thank you, thank you, thank you! I love your videos and you're both gorgeous humans! I wish I attend a meet up with you all but I think you've already been to L.A. :)
I sent a girl I saw working in store flowers. The message was that I thought she was really beautiful.. But I don't know if she's gay or straight.. And I'm scared of rejection. But I wanted her to know somehow that I like her. What do you all think? Would you be flattered with flowers or freak out?
Suggestions where people can meet ?
thank you! nice video and wise ladies 💞
@4:46 As a transwoman, I can tell you that, yes, you ARE doomed. It's the cold, hard truth.
Please do not think that. I know several trans women online who have cis lesbian partners, a few married to them. There are far more of us cis lesbians who are trans-inclusive than the not, it’s a small but loud portion of cis lesbians that aren’t.
@@blueizumi from my experience, cis lesbians have seldom have treated me with this "trans-inclusivity" you're talking about. 😒
@@DeltaRonstadt1980 are you pre-op and/or not passing well enough? Remember lesbians are normally turned on by perceivable female sex characteristics, not by female self-ID.
But if you're post-op, look feminine are are beautiful, congratulations, you have met TERFs in real life. /irony
I know for a fact I aint doomed, as a non-op trans woman. It's not healthy to think like this, let alone to spread it.
@@silkysnow6793 I guess you have better luck than me. 😒
ohhhh where are the next sapphic circle meetings? where can I find details about them? :)
I wish I had a girlfriend like her
I have a problem finding title for my sexuality! I can date men that are feminine. Trans, cross dresser, but not straight men?
What about feminine straight men?
Fun of heaven. Nice video 👨🦲
Great protips!!
Ok so here is my question: I am dirt poor yet attracted to high-status girls. How can I meet them if we obviously navigate in separate waters? Before you judge: I am not after their money, I just love that classy high-status flair.
The right person will fxck with you regardless of your money status. If they like you it won’t be for the money if they’re for you.
@@flowerchild33 Pity I don't want to "fxck" with anyone, which I guess is part of the problem.
Thanks!
Is stalking a sign or a red flag?
In the US it’s a crime. Regardless of the country/state I live in, having ANYONE following me around would be a major cause for alarm. I’m not into anyone who can’t or won’t engage w/ me openly, honestly, and respectfully.
@@hannahbuffy7400 I was actually online shopping for motion sensor video camera alarms. I don't trust anybody because of what happened to me
for the algo
Have you ever been to an lgbtq-related protest? And do you know how I might be able to find out when and where a protest might be? The US is passing so many phobic laws right now, so I'm curious how I can help.
Which laws?
BRAVA‼️Well if you're in my current home state there's plenty going on including major upheaval @ Dodgers baseball stadium LA. Sisters of Perpetual indulgence who are charitable volunteers in service to the gay community since the HIV/AIDS pandemic in the early 80s. The got uninvited to pride night. ( then with a genuine apology got invited back & now in enlightened Kristians are ablaze anew.(Jesusian and 🌈 here. I call myself Jesusian these days as the right wingers ruined the handle of Christianity for us.)
An elementary school in North Hollywood is also a current hotspot here as well as most drag story times in libraries that has become popular nationwide.
Of course for financial ooomph where needed the ACLU in the US is a great place to support the disenfranchised 💁🏼♀️‼️😎
@@LittleLulubee let's start with the right to terminate a pregnancy. Or we could go back to the Equal Rights amendment that never passed and could rescind you right to vote whatsoever... like that sister
❤❤❤
I just had my first wlw heartbreak 2 months ago and I've gotten a lot better since it happened, but do u have any advice on how to move on?
Date again. It pushes the heartbreak further into history
Hello! After having my first (bad) relationship, it has gotten me to doubt if I like women. I don't know if it is because of my bad relationship or maybe I don't like women. I feel confused, my feelings drift from being numb to all the sudden, I have the urge to have a girlfriend, but then those feelings fade away again? I've never had the urge to be with a man. I know if I date again. I could find out what my feelings could mean, but I am too scared to go through that again. Any advice?
How long has it been since you broke up? I'm sorry you had a bad relationship experience. Have you spoke to friends or family or even a therapist to guide you through this? We can all feel a bit funky after bad breakup and it can take a while to organize your feelings and find yourself again. ❤❤
@@janellemargot4376 we broke up a year ago but stayed friends until February (she didn't wanted to be friends anymore) so I haven't had contact with her since then. I have only talked with my friends about it and it sorta helped. I do feel much better about the situation but Ive been left with (I think) more confusion about my feelings.
Do you believe that a bi-curious girl can eventually transition into a queer girl? I know someone and she’s always been in relationships with men. All her life, non-stop. But as soon as she gets drunk and gets close to me, then it starts🤦🏻. Which leads to big fights with her bf. I think poor girl still can’t figure out what she is and after another incident just locks herself in the house embarrassed.
She identifies as straight but I think it’s all a good cover-up.
Do you guys have an Onlyfans?
I am currently in a situation where I like someone who I know liked me four months ago (I don't think she knows that I know) but I was with someone else back then and then needed to recover from that, but now idk if she likes me anymore and we don't really see each other bc we just graduated. I'm gonna go on vacation with her and a couple of friends though in 1 1/2 months. What should I do?
scissor her.
@@bebophippie1781 well that's vulgar
@@thecutienamedshrek8833 I'm sorry. I was drinking and crafting and watching videos and got carried away.
@@bebophippie1781 don't sweat it it was actually funny
@@thecutienamedshrek8833 Good, I was going for humor, and in response to your original post. If you like that person let them know. Worst case is you get embarrassed and they get flattered. Enjoy your vacation.
How many chances would you give someone who just keeps messing up the relationship x
One or two...then move on
I’d say three. More than that would just be self-inflicted abuse.
Sounds like you've given enough.
"life" is a great mystery and pherhaps no one is able to dig the truth so far because we are "different from one another" the easiest is to do as you please.
Alexis and Lilian,
Regarding Ashley and doomed.
I am a post op trans femme lesbian.
My dating pool has been empty.
Dating a bi woman didn't fullfil what she wanted. Even in an open relationship.
Lesbians find me "tainted" actually said to me.
Gay men told me trans people are viewed as Fluid.
Doomed no, lost yes.
Alexis and Lilian where to go next?
Happy you are returning to Toronto on your adventure during Pride.
Details.
A plaque dedicated to Jackie Shane will be posted during Pride.
Look her up. She opened doors in the Toronto 60s before people closed them.
My last GF was 2010. In my 50's and can't find a really good partner. :( Is there anyone even out there? Ty
Hi baby 🐎🐴🐎
Hello there I have been following you for a while now I am 77 years old and only came out 2 years ago my problem is I have a young 25 year old who says she is in to me and I am afraid to say I adore her but feel that I should pull back as the age difference is so great what is your opinion I can't help feeling guilty about the way I feel for her, so far I have not acted on any of this and kept here at arms length but OMG its hard. Help what should I do I know what I would like to do BUT!
3 weeks late so this may not still be relevant. This is just my personal opinion, so please do take it with a pinch of salt. You have finally come out and are free to be yourself, and I think it's so exciting that you have met someone who is into you and you are into her! Surely you deserve to enjoy that! I can't see anything to feel guilty about. My Dad has a 40 year age gap with with his wife and they make each other happy.
😎😃😊😜😍😘💖🌹
What if you’re bisexual Trans Woman with Down syndrome,mdd,add,and ocd?
US President Donald Trump had many girlfriend, so I put his picture on my profile 👨🦲🙆♀️🤰
I am male, but i would like to be a friend with lesbian girls))
Hahhaah
@@rozengarcia-qd1py 😘
🤣
You're a really funny guy!
Bonjour les filles en toute amitié bien pour les repartage bien bisous
Gays should date gays
Straights should date straights
Bis should date bis
Win, win
Ahora casadas estan mejor, se ven hermosas, mis saludos y respetos mis hermosas damas que son extraordinarias
Have a new co-worker who is 🌈, she greets me at work with a kiss on the face and she's very married 🤷🏼♀️. I really like having a solid sister in my work group but she's a tad much but on the good side.
On another topic, are you familiar with limerence?? ( in regards to an irrefutable attraction for all the wrong reasons as I understand it.)
❤❤❤❤
Namaste chicha 😂😁
💜💜