@@jkgkj00 Abusers almost always hide their abusive behavior in the beginning. Most people don't chose known abusers. Then comes the threats to the victims and it causes a lot of fear to leave, because the abuse and threats escalate. There's a fear to stay, but often a bigger fear of leaving. Many victims that did leave (getting a restraining order and even relocating) end up dead, or their family ends up hurt or dead. This isn't about "bad decisions".
So true, I won’t be surprised if they give him early release. I hope she moves far away & cuts off any relationship linked to him. They released some dude from Tennessee & he went straight to his victim & unalived her…sad Bricen Rivers is the name
The woman that stole chicken wings from her job a school got 40 years or something crazy like that and an abusive psychotic kidnapping boyfriend only got seven years America. We got problems.
He should be serving life in prison. he will hurt someone else or worse when he gets out. Prison rehabilitates NO ONE. Especially not in years, which he won't even serve 7 years. Probably half of that with gain time. Sick. Our justice system is a joke.
I love how much her parents tried to help her feel safe by changing things at the house & even offering to move all together. That's the kind of support that all victims need. 😇🤗
YES! THAT is exactly how i knew it was time to get out. Im an outgoing person and i went to the store one day and couldn't look one person in the eye i felt shameful and ugly. I felt like everyone hated me ... Complete strangers .
@@Open_Your_Eyesthat’s been me my whole life. Abuse started with my step dad to my mom to her boyfriend and then my kids father after he got out of prison. I have so much anxiety it’s not even funny
@@ChebeGrowth Have you thought about counseling? Maybe changing your way of thinking about your abuser might help. I hope this pattern of abuse hasn’t been passed down to your kids. Good luck to you.
I just made this comment !!! great minds think alike and yes this is serious and our children should be made aware early on one of the ways to combat this epidemic is through education early on
because the public education system is controlled by males, we live in a patriarchy. males look out for males, they don't wanna pull the fire alarm on themselves obviously.
When i was a kid and teen girl, i always was told i was mature for my age because of my mindset was not typically thinking at the level of a teenager or child. Never did i ever think it was an invitation to go off and do adult things. I knew that definitely for sure because i grew up in the hood and learned early on to keep my head on a swivel and never trust strangers, especially men. So this is not completely true.
I love her spirit but she is in the early stages, imagine that was your first relationship, very interesting and good story to hear because the situation is unique.
Stop doing this mental gymnastics of trying to avoid holding men accountable. The whole point of abuse is successfully tricking someone into thinking you’re a good man, then once she is in love with you, start doubling down on the abuse. It’s physical AND psychological. We should emphasize women reporting, but should also teach men to not be entitled and respect women.
Yeah dating apps need stop letting these predator search for kids in dating apps. The Dating apps is not meant for adults but for kids oh wait the dating app is meant for adults and kids lie about their age on it.
I went through the same thing for years! I finally got to the point where I was done! So I did what everyone said and I left. Two months later my ex broke into my house, kidnapped me and drove us both off a 70 ft embankment, hitting several trees on the way down, and landing in a dry creek bed Thank god it was dry because I would’ve drowned if not because of being unconscious. Luckily I didn’t even have time to put a seat belt on so I went through the windshield. I had over 450 stitches in my face, 10 fractured bones in my face alone, broke every rib that I have, punctured lung, completely crushed my ankle, which is now a titanium ball and screws. I had to learn how to walk again, I had to go through several months of physical and mental therapy for ptsd, anxiety, and depression. Me ex got a 20 year sentence for kidnapping and assault and only did 4 years and was released! He has a great job, making great money and living a great life! While I live life every day looking in the mirror and am reminded of what someone I loved did to me. It’s a crazy sad world we live in and domestic violence is not talked about nearly enough! I pray for you and any other dv victims!
Was it because of “good behavior?” It’s always easy to have good behavior when your preferred victims aren’t in prison with you. Pedos and people who commit DV always seem to get out early for that reason.
“No one else is going to want me” makes my stomach churn. Narcissists love to used your insecurities against you and create more. Along with women’s health classes we should be teaching young ladies psychology and red flags. I wish I had known at 16 what I know at 40.
Tell me about it. I think there should be a class for high-school students to learn the warning signs, etc. of an abusive relationship. My ex use to sing to me the verse from that 2000 song where it goes "and if you want to leave I can guarantee you won't find nobody else like me." 🙄
@@jenninscho1980 its more than having the knowledge, its more about being assured in your own skin and having high self esteem. When i look back at my life I shudder at how much different kinds of DV I had to negotiate ❤
I'm a survivor. He didn't hit me but, he did everything else. He pushed me once and because I stood up to him in that moment and yelled at him, he left me two months later for the girl he cheated on me with. I reached out to her and told her if she needs anything to please talk to me. They ended up breaking up 7 months later after he broke her front door and shattered the glass door. We're best friends now.
@@jkgkj00You need help. I’ve seen you make a couple comments earlier downplaying abusive relationships. Go do something productive, and put the phone down.
There needs to be classes in junior high or high school or somewhere in this age range so the kids or young adults will know what to look out for and red flags or if you're with a toxic person. What's normal in a relationship and what's not normal. When you're just starting out dating you're young you don't know the signs and you need guidance from your family from your parents or some dating class. I'm so sorry for this woman I don't even know how she focused on her nursing school and classes. This is straight up insane!!!
If it makes you feel better, I had a unit in class about this my freshman year of hs! It was a class that taught us a lot of important things, like this, the dangers of substances, phone use while driving, etc
The authorities know where to look if he comes for her. She changed, and improved herself a lot. He will find a different person, one that he doesn't know. More power to her, she did a great job to better herself.
@@NARCDELUSION He is very likely to go after her. It won't matter what kind of person she has become. His life will have essentially stopped the moment he goes to jail.
That he only received SEVEN years for terrorizing her for years, kidnapping & attempted murder is truly INSANE. I'm thankful that she is telling her story & helping others. I've seen male & female friends, coworkers & sadly relatives go through mental/physical abuse in relationships and it's heartbreaking. When you know the signs you can help/warn that much earlier.
Understand...Abusers almost always hide their abusive behavior in the beginning. Most people don't chose known abusers. Then comes the threats to the victims and it causes a lot of fear to leave, because the abuse and threats escalate. There's a fear to stay, but often a bigger fear of leaving. Many victims that did leave (getting a restraining order and even relocating) end up dead, or their family ends up hurt or dead. This isn't about "bad decisions". I'm glad she was one of the lucky ones!
@rose.g-The abusers also make you believe it’s all your fault. With my situation I thought that if I hadn’t been doing drugs I wouldn’t have met my ex and wouldn’t be in this relationship.
@@kristentrep5038 Right because if assault someone walking them to their door after the first date a 2nd date and eventual relationship gets replaced by catching a case and probable prison time.
@@JustASmallTownGirl85 Thanks. Based off his pics...Looks like he might have dabbled in roids...and that could have partially led to his anger issues.
My Mom with 6 kids was brutally beat by our step Dad for 15 years….. your comment leaving is the most dangerous time is so true…… so grateful that you had the wisdom to take your car and get to the police ♥️
OMG I recommend Lundy Bancroft's book all the time and he's probably gotten a royalty check just from the number of books I've bought to give away. I'm always glad to see someone else recommending it.
This is a powerful story that should be a movie. I think it’s a good message for young girls in relationships today to recognize red flags. There were a couple times where I thought I would’ve gone to the cops. But we need to let young women know that this type of behavior is unacceptable. And obviously this guy had mental illness. She’s very blessed to be alive.
Her saying "I've done harder things" really resonated with me. I'm a survivor of childhood abuse, and being 21 years old now and trying to work through that trauma, I say the same thing to encourage myself. I tell myself "I've been through harder things" when it seems like I'll never work through the damage that trauma caused me, I appreciate seeing another abuse survivor who does the same thing.
I'm so proud of you! I just got out of a 22 year abusive relationship. I did try leaving in the past (3 to be exact), but he would charm his way back in. Thought I could change him, I understand now that it couldn't happen. I may be broke, homeless and alone... but I would rather have that then be his punching bag any longer. He's in jail right now, facing a class 1 felony of threatening to slice my throat with a knife (which is all on the 911 recording). He's looking at 10-15 years in jail!
You're so lucky to have a family that supports you like that, ive been through countless moments of abuse and my parents don't help and actively suggested i stayed with my abusers
Hearing her story, I see alot of my own. Even though its been almost 30 years, when triggered, its like I'm there again, saying and doing whatever I have to, to survive. Being kept from my family, losing my friends, hiding cuts, bruises and bald spots, making excuses, the embarrassment, the threats, physical, mental and emotional abuse. It seems awfully easy for people to who've never been in situations like this to throw comments. Lucky you. Glad that you've never been in a place like this, begging and praying that you make it out alive. For so many women, making it out alive isn't the outcome. She is an amazing young lady, I'm so very proud of her and she will do fantastic things! Way to go sweetie👏👏👏💪👏👏👏!
He's a narcissistic sociopath. I'm married to one, so I know. He's so charming, and is so attentive to OTHER women. LOOOOONG story. Yeah, and I'M stuck, cuz he takes all my fixed retirement income, and I have a farm and animals to take care of. Then, he tells everyone how crazy I am. I rarely leave my farm, except for dr appts or surgeries. I prayed that God would get his attention. He recently had an emergency surgery, and they discovered a rare cancer. He hasnt changed,...yet...but I trust God WILL change him. He is a bully coward.
I wish your prayer would have been: "i prayed that God would call him to the other side permanently". There fixed for you ma lady. Otherwise, sorry that you have to endure all that!! Stay strapped.
😢knowing that you need is income is a way of him to make you think you wouldn't be able to do it without him trust me girl you would be alot happier if you just make your own income and in a peaceful house
It's so outrageous and despicable that a male with no criminal history can, all of a sudden, be so evil, violent and hateful against a female he is/was in a relationship with, up to the point where he thinks murdering her is okay.
Some people grow up in this environment and enjoy the normalcy. Also, parents should be educating their children about what normal relationships should be like. Most just come up with the idea that their children will live and learn so there’s no point.
I had an ex hold me hostage in my apartment and beat me the whole time until I attempted to jump out my second story window when he finally fell asleep. He received 88 days to run concurrent with a gun charge. It's negligence on the laws parts for letting men get away with this.
Just because someone was given a felony title and was in prison for seven years, doesn’t mean jack. They don’t care about the laws. They should’ve pursued the highest punishment.
"I'll probably end up being hit by him but I'm not in danger here" This is scary and real. I have lived this reality, not to her extent but this type of thing is normal when you have no one to guide you and no one to show you the signs. Especially with the older generations who will talk down on you for leaving someone who is quite literally abusing you because they believe in "working things out".
“well you had wanted to watch that documentary, about the serial killer, well i’m gonna make this such a big deal to the point we’re gonna have a netflix series” sent chills down my spine.
Domestic violence needs to be talked about more especially in young people. I’ve been in a domestic violence situation at a young age and it took awhile for me to get out so I applauded her! For staying strong and standing her ground
I’ve been in this situation and even years after I got out, he would still try to come back while also trying to hurt me (showing me all the other women he slept with) it took me a long time to finally be able to completely block him. It’s been 7 years and now in a healthy and happy marriage
I’m glad she’s ok. She says her friends never told her this was wrong and they knew he hit her and was controlling? I hope she found new friends. Very concerning
I’m so sorry for what you went through. I went through an abusive relationship when I was 15. This story is kind of triggering because I relate a lot to what you’re saying. I’m so glad you’re okay. I was very lucky my friend knew what was going on and she got me out of there before he killed me. I also had found him cheating again, this was the last straw for me (ofc the cheating and not the abuse..) he punched me in the temple and strangled me. I was so lucky that he let go. Also other times he had held a knife to my stomach and my throat. People like this need to be locked away in prison for the rest of their lives so they don’t hurt anyone else. It’s been 4 years and thankfully I have began to heal. I’m wishing the best for you. We’re so strong. ♥️
I'm a survivor. I was in her same position when I was young with someone a little older. It started just like this. Sending her all the love. We must do more to protect women in these situations. I was in the hospital multiple times but he was friends with the police & never had to pay for what he did. He was feom Greece and his mother insisted he could do no wrong bc he was the first born. She insisted it was my fault. I got out 15 years ago, moved to another state, he's STILL looking for me.
@@likethatidea9899thanks for ignoring the importance of the message and giving an English lesson nobody asked for. It must be challenging to be perfect in an imperfect world.
As a survivor l know your story. Thanks for speaking out. In my day no one would help me. Yes leaving was the most dangerous and l am lucky to be alive.
He asked why the pumpkin was still in the car, bc he saw it and was convinced it was proof you’d been elsewhere overnight instead of home, so he assumed it was proof of cheating. My ex was the same. Ended up with lifelong restraining order after he tried killing my baby and me. Spent last 23 years running and hiding from his psycho mood swings.
Seven years is too short, I hope she has it in the back of her head to protect herself when he is free, I know of a woman that was murdered when her abuser was free after ten years. Sometimes they keep that anger for the victim and blame the victim for their time in jail.
I admire your desire to help victims. In 1996 I met my ex when I was 17 and he was 25😬 I didn’t know he was a narcissist and manipulative person. I got pregnant at age 19 and moved in with him and my mom was disappointed that I got pregnant out of wedlock so he used that to say that my family was not good to be around 😢 I didn’t communicate with my family for 7 yrs. We got married 1998 had 3 kids I was thinking he will change when he sees I’m so committed and I’m a great mom and wife 😢nope it got worse. He always threatened to kill himself and have knives so I always had to convince him to please stop that 😢Nowadays there’s more information out there and resources I hope more people reach out for help
@@teresaguerrero531 wow I’m so sorry to hear your story. So brave of you to speak up. Thanks for sharing. I hope to use my JD to help more women like you. My heart goes out!
The deadly key words in this sentence “ oh your talking to that person I don’t want you to..” BIG RED FLAG 🚩 the start of a deadly relationship. I’ve been through this when I was a teenager. All this story deals with fear 😧 control it’s sad that this still happens to people
She's definitely a survivor, but I also have to give kudos to her parents for supporting her. They did and were willing to do so much to protect her and make her feel safe. Glad she had thay support system.
He will come back for you once he gets out. I hope you learn self-defense martial arts or move to another city and don't use social media. Change your name.
What the actual hell is wrong with you ? Making this beautiful girl more terrified than she already is and way before it's even time for him to get released. She doesn't need these comments . I understand the concern but the way you worded it is way off putting I would rephrase and maybe say I would look into taking some defense courses just in case he has any funny ideas when he gets out. It's less aggressive which she needs right now otherwise she's going to feel attacked just by reading this. Just a suggestion and I know from personal experience I went through a worse kidnapping in 2016 and he just got out last month
@@RAWWJUSTICE I mean hes not lying, she doesnt seem like the brightest and she alsi doesnt seem like she has any survival instincts "having to decide staying in the car or driving off was the hardest decision" wtf
This is 100% my ex ! I got away from him, with our three kids, almost three years ago now! He was so scary. It's so hard to explain how it is to live with someone like this. I'm so glad my kids and I got away from him. I pray for all the others stuck with someone like that
Abusers almost always hide their abusive behavior in the beginning. Most people don't chose known abusers. Then comes the threats to the victims and it causes a lot of fear to leave, because the abuse and threats escalate. There's a fear to stay, but often a bigger fear of leaving. Many victims that did leave (getting a restraining order and even relocating) end up dead, or their family ends up hurt or dead. This isn't about "bad decisions".
Yes ☝🏼that is so true plus it's not easy to leave someone every situation is different could the girl have left him before any of this went down Yes but if he was willing to do this because she wouldn't answer the phone plus whatever else led up to that just think of how things would have happened or might have happened if she told him she was leaving him He probably would have killed her immediately without even taking her anywhere
Devils advocate here but a lot of times people give the other person reason/reasons enough to do what they do… Idk man there’s a lot of truth to what she says with evidence.. but her lack of emotion is what questions it.. 🤔
Many don't realize that 1.very few can afford therapy 2. It's so terrifying even thinking or planning to leave 3. the fear impacts yoir ability yo make decisions 4. crimes against women aren't treated as seriously as they should be 5. the trauma does heal somewhat but never completely
"Whirlwind, moving fast." Ladies (and young men), this is how abusers start. You get swept up in that early romance. Then the control starts. True adult love feels more like a friendship that turns into a partnership.
Abusers almost always hide their abusive behavior in the beginning. Most people don't chose known abusers. Then comes the threats to the victims and it causes a lot of fear to leave, because the abuse and threats escalate. There's a fear to stay, but often a bigger fear of leaving. Many victims that did leave (getting a restraining order and even relocating) end up dead, or their family ends up hurt or dead. This isn't about "bad decisions".
It's sadly pointless most of the time. The police mainly ignore the warning signs and don't actively get involved until something terrible happens. It's just sad that this is the world we live in.
This is why I don't want a man in my life! I did get out of an abusive marriage and it didn't get physical but it was verbally, mentally and emotionally which did affect me. I'm glad i got out before it would've gotten physical. I would never want to meet someone online. It's so hard to trust anyone these days! They can lie on their profile and be a completely different person or like in this case, start out great then thier true colors come out! So glad she was able to get out of that awful relationship!
Men like this can’t hold their mask up for long. His mask slipped pretty early in their relationship. Early enough to see the signs and leave before it escalates. The problem with this girl is that she was not taught about these signs and was naive since it was her first real relationship. Men like this exist in real life and online. They need to be outed and exposed more often.
@@nygalflheart333 what she said has some truth to it. A lot of people don’t understand what a healthy relationship looks like and so therefore it is very normalised to be in a toxic relationship. I don’t think she meant it as in. It’s okay but it actually is normalised.
She is saying the culture especially with social media, makes it look cool😂 and I agree. At 40 I'd never date today (if I was single) because everything toxic is glorified. People pay attention to these weird relationships where people argue and abuse each other over the internet. The more toxic, the more clicks and views and attention.
My Ex boyfriend did the same thing to me . I was kidnapped beaten and raped repeatedly and he only got 6 years..Trust me I feel your pain stay strong Sis!
In my past I was in a very abusive relationship....it is hard to get out. He would say "you leave and I will kill your mother" When she was saying she was getting all those emails in class, she should have reported it to someone because she was not the only person in danger...he said he was going to kill everyone. Why did they not show his face...he is an adult and showing his face may save someone else when he is released from a ridiculous sentence of 7 years.
Oh my gosh, how many of us got to that point and lived to tell about it?? When you just stopped pleading, stopped crying, and accepted the fact you were about to die. Some of us were just relieved to finally be coming to a conclusion, an end to the suffering... some of us decided we were gonna go out fighting, but somehow, by some miracle we survived either way and we're here now to tell the story. PLEASE, for the sake of all the folks coming after, please tell your story, so they have some hope that it CAN get better, and most importantly: they DESERVE better. ♥️✌️
So he cheats on her but tries to control her and make sure she’s not with another guy. Classic narcissist and manipulator. Glad she’s safe:)
And this will be normal if trump wins.
That what my bf did too
My favorite part was when she took responsibility for her bad decisions and didn’t immediately blame “society”
@@jkgkj00 Abusers almost always hide their abusive behavior in the beginning. Most people don't chose known abusers. Then comes the threats to the victims and it causes a lot of fear to leave, because the abuse and threats escalate. There's a fear to stay, but often a bigger fear of leaving. Many victims that did leave (getting a restraining order and even relocating) end up dead, or their family ends up hurt or dead. This isn't about "bad decisions".
@@jkgkj00Really?
How did he get only 7 years? That plea deal was very lenient. Those were multiple felonies. He deserved at least 20 years.
So true, I won’t be surprised if they give him early release. I hope she moves far away & cuts off any relationship linked to him.
They released some dude from Tennessee & he went straight to his victim & unalived her…sad
Bricen Rivers is the name
The right complexion for protection.
@@AllAboutPurple - What is that word I’ve been seeing lately «unalive». Why not say it like usual «k-i-l-l»??? I don’t get it… Please enlighten me… 🤗
The woman that stole chicken wings from her job a school got 40 years or something crazy like that and an abusive psychotic kidnapping boyfriend only got seven years America. We got problems.
@@AllAboutPurple He killed her. "unalive" isnt a word.
the Abusive boyfriend should have his whole face plastered on social media
He should be serving life in prison. he will hurt someone else or worse when he gets out. Prison rehabilitates NO ONE. Especially not in years, which he won't even serve 7 years. Probably half of that with gain time. Sick. Our justice system is a joke.
Agree
@@michelerenemAgree
Ditto that.
Don't be surprised when he gets a girlfriend soon after released.
Why's his face not shown even once?! People need to know the criminals to stay safe.
Have been seething throughout too!!!
His name is Pawel Sliwinski.
@@nicolec907 He's Polish; that makes sense.
@@redpillwoman9785 As If him being Polish has anything to do with it. These abusers come in many forms. 😅
@@redpillwoman9785 what do u mean?
I love how much her parents tried to help her feel safe by changing things at the house & even offering to move all together. That's the kind of support that all victims need. 😇🤗
That was so beautiful. I was always told "he really likes you!"
It’s surprising to me that people apparently “care” 👀
@@thatgirl9532what do you even mean by that?
The “I couldn’t look people in the eye” because of an abusive relationship is the saddest truth.
amen, took me YEARS to be able to that again 1985 to 2003 is a long time to be brainwashed
YES! THAT is exactly how i knew it was time to get out. Im an outgoing person and i went to the store one day and couldn't look one person in the eye i felt shameful and ugly. I felt like everyone hated me ... Complete strangers .
I thought that was just me, abusive relationship really takes a toll on your mental health 😔
@@Open_Your_Eyesthat’s been me my whole life. Abuse started with my step dad to my mom to her boyfriend and then my kids father after he got out of prison. I have so much anxiety it’s not even funny
@@ChebeGrowth Have you thought about counseling? Maybe changing your way of thinking about your abuser might help. I hope this pattern of abuse hasn’t been passed down to your kids. Good luck to you.
I don't understand why abuser behavior isn't taught in public schools. It's a public health emergency
I totally agree. Young women need to know the first signs of controlling behavior.
Excellent point!
I just made this comment !!! great minds think alike and yes this is serious and our children should be made aware early on one of the ways to combat this epidemic is through education early on
because the public education system is controlled by males, we live in a patriarchy. males look out for males, they don't wanna pull the fire alarm on themselves obviously.
I agree. 10000%
" We met on a dating app while I was in high-school " 🚩🚩🚩
happens more than you think
Where TF were her parents? This was out of control before he even got physical
That’s all that needs to be said. Exactly
And how’s that working for evabody. (Rhetorical)
😂😂 for real lmfao
She was her own hero. I’m so proud she had the courage to get out. And she inspired so many people!!!
Totally agree. 🎉
Question sorry I am younger but why wouldn’t she had lead him to the police, or had the police follow her home?
God was her hero too!!😢
Just sad her parents or teachers didn’t teach her this was not normal or okay.
@@coriemmett1363absolutely not lol
Never tell children that they're women now or very mature for their age. They'll believe it.
Exactly!!! That stuck out to me
It’s grooming.
Classic groomer line
When i was a kid and teen girl, i always was told i was mature for my age because of my mindset was not typically thinking at the level of a teenager or child. Never did i ever think it was an invitation to go off and do adult things. I knew that definitely for sure because i grew up in the hood and learned early on to keep my head on a swivel and never trust strangers, especially men.
So this is not completely true.
Mature with the way she talks lmao?
I’ll bet this guy had many red flags before she even dated him. Raising awareness to help young women spot those red flags is so important.
Which is another reason not to date someone that no one you know knows. He had to have history. Too bad his mom didn't clue her in.
@@icare4you123 not true my abusive ex knew alot of old female friends i knew so i assumed he was a good man
Right, "love bombing" was the start of the relationship the way she described it.
I love her spirit but she is in the early stages, imagine that was your first relationship, very interesting and good story to hear because the situation is unique.
Stop doing this mental gymnastics of trying to avoid holding men accountable. The whole point of abuse is successfully tricking someone into thinking you’re a good man, then once she is in love with you, start doubling down on the abuse. It’s physical AND psychological. We should emphasize women reporting, but should also teach men to not be entitled and respect women.
He’s the epitome of insecurity in himself
He cheated on her.
@@rockon8174 Some people seek attention from the opposite gender to quell their own insecurities.
Her fault
She should’ve left when she found out he was cheating
Nah, this is one of those pathological jealousy guys. He may or may not be insecure.
The first red flag 🚩 is an adult finding a high school senior online to date.
It's not rare, I've heard most college aged girls date older men
Yeah dating apps need stop letting these predator search for kids in dating apps. The Dating apps is not meant for adults but for kids oh wait the dating app is meant for adults and kids lie about their age on it.
I went through the same thing for years! I finally got to the point where I was done! So I did what everyone said and I left. Two months later my ex broke into my house, kidnapped me and drove us both off a 70 ft embankment, hitting several trees on the way down, and landing in a dry creek bed
Thank god it was dry because I would’ve drowned if not because of being unconscious. Luckily I didn’t even have time to put a seat belt on so I went through the windshield. I had over 450 stitches in my face, 10 fractured bones in my face alone, broke every rib that I have, punctured lung, completely crushed my ankle, which is now a titanium ball and screws. I had to learn how to walk again, I had to go through several months of physical and mental therapy for ptsd, anxiety, and depression. Me ex got a 20 year sentence for kidnapping and assault and only did 4 years and was released! He has a great job, making great money and living a great life! While I live life every day looking in the mirror and am reminded of what someone I loved did to me. It’s a crazy sad world we live in and domestic violence is not talked about nearly enough! I pray for you and any other dv victims!
4 yrs of a 20 yr sentence is INSANE!!!!!! WTF??!!!!!
this makes me so mad. my heart breaks for you
Was it because of “good behavior?” It’s always easy to have good behavior when your preferred victims aren’t in prison with you. Pedos and people who commit DV always seem to get out early for that reason.
Is there a way to appeal his early release? This is insane!
@@Emma.S. There is however, when the perp has access to resources it makes it a difficult upturn.
“No one else is going to want me” makes my stomach churn. Narcissists love to used your insecurities against you and create more.
Along with women’s health classes we should be teaching young ladies psychology and red flags. I wish I had known at 16 what I know at 40.
Every young woman should read The Gift of Fear
Tell me about it. I think there should be a class for high-school students to learn the warning signs, etc. of an abusive relationship. My ex use to sing to me the verse from that 2000 song where it goes "and if you want to leave I can guarantee you won't find nobody else like me." 🙄
@@racheltarentino3314yes! A great book!
and not just the girls! teach the boys not to be abusive.
@@jenninscho1980 its more than having the knowledge, its more about being assured in your own skin and having high self esteem. When i look back at my life I shudder at how much different kinds of DV I had to negotiate ❤
I'm a survivor. He didn't hit me but, he did everything else. He pushed me once and because I stood up to him in that moment and yelled at him, he left me two months later for the girl he cheated on me with. I reached out to her and told her if she needs anything to please talk to me. They ended up breaking up 7 months later after he broke her front door and shattered the glass door. We're best friends now.
He stayed with him for two months and wasn’t even gonna want to break up with him lol it’s so amazing how you always blame everyone but yourself
@@jkgkj00gross how you always blame the woman not the abuser.
@@jkgkj00You need help. I’ve seen you make a couple comments earlier downplaying abusive relationships. Go do something productive, and put the phone down.
Trauma bonding much? 😬
He’s trash but she also knew you were the gf no? But still stayed with him for 7 months?
There needs to be classes in junior high or high school or somewhere in this age range so the kids or young adults will know what to look out for and red flags or if you're with a toxic person. What's normal in a relationship and what's not normal. When you're just starting out dating you're young you don't know the signs and you need guidance from your family from your parents or some dating class. I'm so sorry for this woman I don't even know how she focused on her nursing school and classes. This is straight up insane!!!
No it starts at home
@@nicolejohnson4989as said not everyone has 2 parents or healthy relationships then they should have a class for it
Agreed. I’m pretty sure they do educate children about healthy relationships. But not in the US. I think France does for instance
@@nicolejohnson4989 The whole "starting at home" doesn't help the kids who live in toxic homes.
If it makes you feel better, I had a unit in class about this my freshman year of hs! It was a class that taught us a lot of important things, like this, the dangers of substances, phone use while driving, etc
7 years isn't long enough. I hope she is ready for when he gets out.
He only got 7 years cause the other charges got dropped in order to avoid Alexis having to testify in court and protect her
I was thinking the same I will be so afraid of him getting out, he will be very dangerous for her and her family. I will move away and change my name.
The authorities know where to look if he comes for her. She changed, and improved herself a lot. He will find a different person, one that he doesn't know. More power to her, she did a great job to better herself.
@@NARCDELUSION He is very likely to go after her. It won't matter what kind of person she has become. His life will have essentially stopped the moment he goes to jail.
@@NARCDELUSIONit does not matter what she has become, he is still a threat to her and her family.
It’s never normal to have an abusive relationship. Never never never
If he’s out in 7 years I think he would probably be looking for her as soon as he got out!
Yeah I hope she’s gonna protect herself
I really hope she will be strong. May God protect her 🙏🏼
The laws need to protect the victims more. I feel like the criminals have more rights than the victims in most cases.
That he only received SEVEN years for terrorizing her for years, kidnapping & attempted murder is truly INSANE.
I'm thankful that she is telling her story & helping others. I've seen male & female friends, coworkers & sadly relatives go through mental/physical abuse in relationships and it's heartbreaking. When you know the signs you can help/warn that much earlier.
Understand...Abusers almost always hide their abusive behavior in the beginning. Most people don't chose known abusers. Then comes the threats to the victims and it causes a lot of fear to leave, because the abuse and threats escalate. There's a fear to stay, but often a bigger fear of leaving. Many victims that did leave (getting a restraining order and even relocating) end up dead, or their family ends up hurt or dead. This isn't about "bad decisions". I'm glad she was one of the lucky ones!
@rose.g-The abusers also make you believe it’s all your fault. With my situation I thought that if I hadn’t been doing drugs I wouldn’t have met my ex and wouldn’t be in this relationship.
This is somewhat true, also a lot of people tend to turn a blind eye on the red flags thinking they're ok
Wait so most abusers don't get physically violent on the first date before seeing if the abused would like to go on a second one? That don't add up
The abuse starts slow, and they tend to make you feel so extra special! Your flattered by just how much they love you.. 😢
@@kristentrep5038 Right because if assault someone walking them to their door after the first date a 2nd date and eventual relationship gets replaced by catching a case and probable prison time.
Seriously...they don't show the dude for the whole video?🤔
horrible men will always be protected by the media.
Pawel Sliwinski- google it
His name is Pawel Sliwinski you can Google his name to see a Pic. I thought it was weird they didn't show him also.
@@JustASmallTownGirl85 Thanks. Based off his pics...Looks like he might have dabbled in roids...and that could have partially led to his anger issues.
@@rayharvey1330 sure, make excuses for him, weirdo.
My Mom with 6 kids was brutally beat by our step Dad for 15 years….. your comment leaving is the most dangerous time is so true…… so grateful that you had the wisdom to take your car and get to the police ♥️
The fact she didn’t cry while talking abt this shows how brave she is. I’m glad she survived and she’s safe.
What a brave girl to stand up for herself and get the justice she deserves although 7 years isn’t enough. Glad she’s safe and well 💕💕
He's a classic abuser; starts out as Prince Charming.....Read Lundy Bancroft's "Why Does He Do That?"
They all do! Also check out The Power of Fear! Listen to your gut ladies or else 💀
OMG I recommend Lundy Bancroft's book all the time and he's probably gotten a royalty check just from the number of books I've bought to give away. I'm always glad to see someone else recommending it.
@@GrainneDhub-ll6vw It is SUCH an amazing book! "The Gift of Fear," too, though it has some problems.
and absolutely necessary book for survivors of abuse and ESPECIALLY those still stuck in the thick of it.
how insecure does one have to be to hurt someone at this high of a level
Its narcissistic sadism
This is a powerful story that should be a movie. I think it’s a good message for young girls in relationships today to recognize red flags. There were a couple times where I thought I would’ve gone to the cops. But we need to let young women know that this type of behavior is unacceptable. And obviously this guy had mental illness. She’s very blessed to be alive.
His name is Pawel Sliwinski
Yeah weird they didn’t show him at all
@@Nzmwwww1238 I think she just wanted to focus on her own journey and her healing in her story 🤷🏼♂️
I wish they would have showed his face or name at least. Wtf. Women need to know who to avoid.
@@Anna.T. totally agree
He looked nuts 😳
Her saying "I've done harder things" really resonated with me. I'm a survivor of childhood abuse, and being 21 years old now and trying to work through that trauma, I say the same thing to encourage myself. I tell myself "I've been through harder things" when it seems like I'll never work through the damage that trauma caused me, I appreciate seeing another abuse survivor who does the same thing.
I'm a survivor of 18 years of Abuse I'm stronger and have my Eternity voice back !!!! Never be afraid to get help even if you think its Impossible !!!
💜🧡
I wish I had your strength to leave my 23 year abusive relationship 😢
I'm so proud of you! I just got out of a 22 year abusive relationship. I did try leaving in the past (3 to be exact), but he would charm his way back in. Thought I could change him, I understand now that it couldn't happen. I may be broke, homeless and alone... but I would rather have that then be his punching bag any longer. He's in jail right now, facing a class 1 felony of threatening to slice my throat with a knife (which is all on the 911 recording). He's looking at 10-15 years in jail!
@evarm7546 you do have her strength you do
He love bombed her, then started slowly trying to control her. Then manipulating and gaslighting and more love bombing. It's a viscious cycle.
You're so lucky to have a family that supports you like that, ive been through countless moments of abuse and my parents don't help and actively suggested i stayed with my abusers
Wait what
@@Rangersarethebestintheuk2023 yeah :(
@@WolfHeartMedia feel bad man
@@Rangersarethebestintheuk2023 ikr
@@WolfHeartMedia just letting you know I am here for u
The love of parents!!❤❤ my heart breaks for you. He is still going to get out so please I pray for your continued safety
Glad he didn't take you away. Thanks for sharing I hope this helps someone make a change.
I wish every survivor had or could receive afterward the amount of love and support she did
Hearing her story, I see alot of my own. Even though its been almost 30 years, when triggered, its like I'm there again, saying and doing whatever I have to, to survive. Being kept from my family, losing my friends, hiding cuts, bruises and bald spots, making excuses, the embarrassment, the threats, physical, mental and emotional abuse. It seems awfully easy for people to who've never been in situations like this to throw comments. Lucky you. Glad that you've never been in a place like this, begging and praying that you make it out alive. For so many women, making it out alive isn't the outcome. She is an amazing young lady, I'm so very proud of her and she will do fantastic things! Way to go sweetie👏👏👏💪👏👏👏!
I’m so glad you survived this and your safe now ♥️
He's a narcissistic sociopath. I'm married to one, so I know. He's so charming, and is so attentive to OTHER women. LOOOOONG story. Yeah, and I'M stuck, cuz he takes all my fixed retirement income, and I have a farm and animals to take care of. Then, he tells everyone how crazy I am. I rarely leave my farm, except for dr appts or surgeries. I prayed that God would get his attention. He recently had an emergency surgery, and they discovered a rare cancer. He hasnt changed,...yet...but I trust God WILL change him. He is a bully coward.
Run and don’t look back.
People like him never change, please escape from him behind his back. Things can escalate at any time.
I wish your prayer would have been: "i prayed that God would call him to the other side permanently". There fixed for you ma lady. Otherwise, sorry that you have to endure all that!! Stay strapped.
So familiar 2nd time around....
😢knowing that you need is income is a way of him to make you think you wouldn't be able to do it without him trust me girl you would be alot happier if you just make your own income and in a peaceful house
It's so outrageous and despicable that a male with no criminal history can, all of a sudden, be so evil, violent and hateful against a female he is/was in a relationship with, up to the point where he thinks murdering her is okay.
it’s insane how common this is
He just never got caught before
Well there has to be a first time and there will probably be more when he’s out
No criminal history just means you weren’t caught yet. That’s why it’s important to be aware of the signs too
You think this was the first time he was like this??
Not in my culture - there’s nothing sexy about dating someone who is toxic
Exactly
Nothing. Not normal or ok.
Some people grow up in this environment and enjoy the normalcy. Also, parents should be educating their children about what normal relationships should be like. Most just come up with the idea that their children will live and learn so there’s no point.
You never been in America then
@@stephaniecobian725i agree with you!
I had an ex hold me hostage in my apartment and beat me the whole time until I attempted to jump out my second story window when he finally fell asleep. He received 88 days to run concurrent with a gun charge. It's negligence on the laws parts for letting men get away with this.
But if you took him out in defense of yourself, the law would have been on his side. I’m sorry you went through that.
Just because someone was given a felony title and was in prison for seven years, doesn’t mean jack. They don’t care about the laws. They should’ve pursued the highest punishment.
"I'll probably end up being hit by him but I'm not in danger here" This is scary and real. I have lived this reality, not to her extent but this type of thing is normal when you have no one to guide you and no one to show you the signs. Especially with the older generations who will talk down on you for leaving someone who is quite literally abusing you because they believe in "working things out".
This!!!
“well you had wanted to watch that documentary, about the serial killer, well i’m gonna make this such a big deal to the point we’re gonna have a netflix series” sent chills down my spine.
Domestic violence needs to be talked about more especially in young people. I’ve been in a domestic violence situation at a young age and it took awhile for me to get out so I applauded her! For staying strong and standing her ground
I’ve been in this situation and even years after I got out, he would still try to come back while also trying to hurt me (showing me all the other women he slept with) it took me a long time to finally be able to completely block him. It’s been 7 years and now in a healthy and happy marriage
Sooo proud of and happy for you. Many haven't been that fortunate. Good for you!👏🏾
Thankful she had parents to show up and make her feel secure afterwards. ❤️
You need to choose your significant other accordingly. Do not ignore the red flags.
What a lovely young woman. I’m so glad she’s ok! 😢
I’m glad she’s ok. She says her friends never told her this was wrong and they knew he hit her and was controlling? I hope she found new friends. Very concerning
I’m so sorry for what you went through. I went through an abusive relationship when I was 15. This story is kind of triggering because I relate a lot to what you’re saying. I’m so glad you’re okay. I was very lucky my friend knew what was going on and she got me out of there before he killed me. I also had found him cheating again, this was the last straw for me (ofc the cheating and not the abuse..) he punched me in the temple and strangled me. I was so lucky that he let go. Also other times he had held a knife to my stomach and my throat. People like this need to be locked away in prison for the rest of their lives so they don’t hurt anyone else. It’s been 4 years and thankfully I have began to heal. I’m wishing the best for you. We’re so strong. ♥️
My ex-husband was the same way, and he was 2 years younger than me. I am so glad that I got out when I did.
I'm a survivor. I was in her same position when I was young with someone a little older. It started just like this. Sending her all the love. We must do more to protect women in these situations. I was in the hospital multiple times but he was friends with the police & never had to pay for what he did. He was feom Greece and his mother insisted he could do no wrong bc he was the first born. She insisted it was my fault. I got out 15 years ago, moved to another state, he's STILL looking for me.
To protect people*
Please be safe
@@likethatidea9899thanks for ignoring the importance of the message and giving an English lesson nobody asked for. It must be challenging to be perfect in an imperfect world.
I hope that things get better for you. Stay strong❤️
Lies, lies, lies 🤦
As a survivor l know your story. Thanks for speaking out. In my day no one would help me. Yes leaving was the most dangerous and l am lucky to be alive.
He asked why the pumpkin was still in the car, bc he saw it and was convinced it was proof you’d been elsewhere overnight instead of home, so he assumed it was proof of cheating. My ex was the same. Ended up with lifelong restraining order after he tried killing my baby and me. Spent last 23 years running and hiding from his psycho mood swings.
You can leave the country you know! Instead of living in fear for the last 23 years!!! Also stay off social media
When they go on their psycho rants they look at anything for proof of their delusions
Brave young woman. May the horror you lived fade away with a better future relationship.
A better future relationship with herself
Seven years is too short, I hope she has it in the back of her head to protect herself when he is free, I know of a woman that was murdered when her abuser was free after ten years. Sometimes they keep that anger for the victim and blame the victim for their time in jail.
As a lawyer who hopes to help survivors like Alexis, Alexis, YOU INSPIRE ME.
❤
I dont know you but I'm sooo very proud of you! We need you! ❤
I admire your desire to help victims. In 1996 I met my ex when I was 17 and he was 25😬 I didn’t know he was a narcissist and manipulative person. I got pregnant at age 19 and moved in with him and my mom was disappointed that I got pregnant out of wedlock so he used that to say that my family was not good to be around 😢 I didn’t communicate with my family for 7 yrs. We got married 1998 had 3 kids I was thinking he will change when he sees I’m so committed and I’m a great mom and wife 😢nope it got worse. He always threatened to kill himself and have knives so I always had to convince him to please stop that 😢Nowadays there’s more information out there and resources I hope more people reach out for help
@@NathalieCwiekSwiercz aww thanks! I’m so glad to be able to use my JD for something to help women in any way I can!
@@teresaguerrero531 wow I’m so sorry to hear your story. So brave of you to speak up. Thanks for sharing. I hope to use my JD to help more women like you. My heart goes out!
Way to go, Alexis! Your story empowers victims and educates to avoid these toxic individuals.
The deadly key words in this sentence “ oh your talking to that person I don’t want you to..” BIG RED FLAG 🚩 the start of a deadly relationship.
I’ve been through this when I was a teenager. All this story deals with fear 😧 control it’s sad that this still happens to people
She is so so brave for sharing this! I hope she keeps speaking on what lead her to date this man. She could save a lot of girls
I’m glad she is safe and okay. The guy needs to rot in Jail.
I was just abducted and beaten by my ex also. This is horrible and I hope you can recover psychologically and emotionally and feel safe.
She's definitely a survivor, but I also have to give kudos to her parents for supporting her. They did and were willing to do so much to protect her and make her feel safe. Glad she had thay support system.
He will come back for you once he gets out. I hope you learn self-defense martial arts or move to another city and don't use social media. Change your name.
What the actual hell is wrong with you ? Making this beautiful girl more terrified than she already is and way before it's even time for him to get released. She doesn't need these comments . I understand the concern but the way you worded it is way off putting I would rephrase and maybe say I would look into taking some defense courses just in case he has any funny ideas when he gets out. It's less aggressive which she needs right now otherwise she's going to feel attacked just by reading this. Just a suggestion and I know from personal experience I went through a worse kidnapping in 2016 and he just got out last month
@@RAWWJUSTICE I mean hes not lying, she doesnt seem like the brightest and she alsi doesnt seem like she has any survival instincts "having to decide staying in the car or driving off was the hardest decision" wtf
He’s obsessed with her .. gonna call from jail , harass and stalk.
@@itsmikaa8496 and thats why she should move
Why is there a suicide helpline warning on this?
Shouldn't it be domestic violence?
UA-cam, you're drunk again, go to bed.
God Bless you for standing up and sharing. 🙏❤️
This is 100% my ex ! I got away from him, with our three kids, almost three years ago now! He was so scary. It's so hard to explain how it is to live with someone like this. I'm so glad my kids and I got away from him. I pray for all the others stuck with someone like that
longest Inside Edition video in awhile, wow
Glad she’s safe ❤️
In a relationship, u either trust the person or u don't. If it's controlling, walk away because it's obvious they don't trust u
Abusers almost always hide their abusive behavior in the beginning. Most people don't chose known abusers. Then comes the threats to the victims and it causes a lot of fear to leave, because the abuse and threats escalate. There's a fear to stay, but often a bigger fear of leaving. Many victims that did leave (getting a restraining order and even relocating) end up dead, or their family ends up hurt or dead. This isn't about "bad decisions".
Yes ☝🏼that is so true plus it's not easy to leave someone every situation is different could the girl have left him before any of this went down Yes but if he was willing to do this because she wouldn't answer the phone plus whatever else led up to that just think of how things would have happened or might have happened if she told him she was leaving him He probably would have killed her immediately without even taking her anywhere
Devils advocate here but a lot of times people give the other person reason/reasons enough to do what they do…
Idk man there’s a lot of truth to what she says with evidence.. but her lack of emotion is what questions it.. 🤔
@@thatgirl9532 there is no excuse for him beating on her. He's a coward
What a beautiful young lady-wishing her a happy and lovely life. Terrible what she went through. 💖
Thank God she was able to get away from him😊
Unfortunately once he gets out he will find another victim with probably more serious outcome!
Yup
Never, ever, take a plea deal when it comes to Domestic Violence
Many don't realize that
1.very few can afford therapy
2. It's so terrifying even thinking or planning to leave
3. the fear impacts yoir ability yo make decisions
4. crimes against women aren't treated as seriously as they should be
5. the trauma does heal somewhat but never completely
She's tough as nails! Great job ❤
You’re an amazing person. I’m so happy you’re out of that relationship and it’s now your time to shine my friend 😉🤙
"Whirlwind, moving fast." Ladies (and young men), this is how abusers start. You get swept up in that early romance. Then the control starts. True adult love feels more like a friendship that turns into a partnership.
Wow…. Just wow, such a heart shattering story, but she handled herself so well while sharing her story ❤
Young women need to KNOW to call the police. This is not human-like behavior.
expect the police don’t even believe them most of the time and brush it off.
calling the police is what CAUSES them to get violent
Abusers almost always hide their abusive behavior in the beginning. Most people don't chose known abusers. Then comes the threats to the victims and it causes a lot of fear to leave, because the abuse and threats escalate. There's a fear to stay, but often a bigger fear of leaving. Many victims that did leave (getting a restraining order and even relocating) end up dead, or their family ends up hurt or dead. This isn't about "bad decisions".
It's sadly pointless most of the time. The police mainly ignore the warning signs and don't actively get involved until something terrible happens. It's just sad that this is the world we live in.
@@rose.g.👏🏻👏🏻 So true. Well written❤
This is why I don't want a man in my life! I did get out of an abusive marriage and it didn't get physical but it was verbally, mentally and emotionally which did affect me. I'm glad i got out before it would've gotten physical.
I would never want to meet someone online. It's so hard to trust anyone these days! They can lie on their profile and be a completely different person or like in this case, start out great then thier true colors come out!
So glad she was able to get out of that awful relationship!
With men its not a matter of if but when, Better stay single then take risks with them
Men like this can’t hold their mask up for long. His mask slipped pretty early in their relationship. Early enough to see the signs and leave before it escalates. The problem with this girl is that she was not taught about these signs and was naive since it was her first real relationship. Men like this exist in real life and online. They need to be outed and exposed more often.
hey, you’re gonna find someone who’ll be there for you, listen to you, and speak to you. there is someone out there you’ll find one day.
0:20 "It's very normalized to be in a toxic relationship". No it fken isn't
In some Hollywood movies, it makes it more dramatic.
@@nygalflheart333 what she said has some truth to it. A lot of people don’t understand what a healthy relationship looks like and so therefore it is very normalised to be in a toxic relationship. I don’t think she meant it as in. It’s okay but it actually is normalised.
She is saying the culture especially with social media, makes it look cool😂 and I agree. At 40 I'd never date today (if I was single) because everything toxic is glorified. People pay attention to these weird relationships where people argue and abuse each other over the internet. The more toxic, the more clicks and views and attention.
She’s really brave to put herself out there and tell her story. I am sure this has helped at least one person. Domestic violence can be so insidious.
My Ex boyfriend did the same thing to me . I was kidnapped beaten and raped repeatedly and he only got 6 years..Trust me I feel your pain stay strong Sis!
In my past I was in a very abusive relationship....it is hard to get out. He would say "you leave and I will kill your mother" When she was saying she was getting all those emails in class, she should have reported it to someone because she was not the only person in danger...he said he was going to kill everyone. Why did they not show his face...he is an adult and showing his face may save someone else when he is released from a ridiculous sentence of 7 years.
Only 7 years? That should easily be a 30-50 years sentence.
I pray and hope she continues to get all the help she needs for her mental health. ❤ sending love and light your way Alexis
The second he started the text barrage she should ave called 911 IMMEDIATELY!
Thank god she is safe
How did this dude have his own life while keeping tabs on her 24-7?
He probably had Spyware on her gadgets
This girl was in high school but dating a guy 3 years her senior? Where was the parental guidance?
Amen 🙏🏾,Sister.
Oh my gosh, how many of us got to that point and lived to tell about it?? When you just stopped pleading, stopped crying, and accepted the fact you were about to die. Some of us were just relieved to finally be coming to a conclusion, an end to the suffering... some of us decided we were gonna go out fighting, but somehow, by some miracle we survived either way and we're here now to tell the story. PLEASE, for the sake of all the folks coming after, please tell your story, so they have some hope that it CAN get better, and most importantly: they DESERVE better. ♥️✌️
Poor girl, she needs counseling so that she can understand what a healthy relationship is. 😢
She talks about therapy and how it important it has been to her.
Thank you for telling your story ❤.
I'm so glad she's safe
Same🩵☝🏾
My lowlife ex started grooming me at 17 he was 10 years older. I stayed closed to 12 years before I found out his behavior was not normal.
The guys name is Pavel Sliwinski. You' re welcome
*You’re
🙏🏾 Thank you!
It’s you’re not your actually ☝️🤓
@@Any-Brilliant6935😶🫡
**Pawel
THANK YOU