ARE YA READY KIDS? | Totally Accurate Battle Simulator

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  • Опубліковано 5 лют 2025
  • Are ya ready kids? I can't heeaaar you! It's been a long time since we played totally accurate battle simulator. Now there's pirates.
    Become a Sponsor: ua-cam.com/users/ja...
    Original Series ► • WAR IS HELL | Totally ...
    ►Twitter : / jacksepticeye
    ►Instagram: / jacksepticeye
    Game Link ► store.steampowe...
    Outro animation created by Pixlpit:
    / pixlpit
    Outro Song created by "Teknoaxe". It's called "I'm everywhere" and you can listen to it here
    • TeknoAXE's Royalty Fre...
    #jacksepticeye #TABS
  • Ігри

КОМЕНТАРІ • 4,6 тис.

  • @Somebody-Somewhere
    @Somebody-Somewhere 5 років тому +1862

    Jack: “Is that a chicken? On a barrel? In the ocean?”
    Me: *Chuck is always watching.*

    • @Feziboy
      @Feziboy 5 років тому +21

      NIce call back! XD

    • @elonmoles9144
      @elonmoles9144 5 років тому +7

      chuck is sexy

    • @goosley6977
      @goosley6977 5 років тому +10

      Chuck is coming with his army over seas

    • @paolahowell9696
      @paolahowell9696 5 років тому +11

      c h u c k , d a m m i t

    • @coleschiff6968
      @coleschiff6968 5 років тому +10

      I always knew Chuck would make a return somewhere😂🤣😭

  • @espada6002
    @espada6002 5 років тому +814

    'Jacksepticeye is not responsible for everything that jacksepticeye says"
    Me: *Visible confusion*

    • @howtubeable
      @howtubeable 5 років тому +7

      Really? I understood him perfectly. He's freeballing with his words.

    • @lone2234
      @lone2234 5 років тому +10

      @@howtubeable it's a joke my dear howard

    • @johnny4167
      @johnny4167 5 років тому

      “LOL”

    • @thehellraiser5550
      @thehellraiser5550 5 років тому

      Immediately says Dynasty wrong 😂😂😂

    • @nathanchilders7331
      @nathanchilders7331 5 років тому +1

      Howard Wiggins r/whoosh

  • @milan_gielis
    @milan_gielis 5 років тому +549

    "Jacksepticeye is not responsible for anything Jacksepticeye says."
    That's.. That's genius..

    • @themadmammoth9573
      @themadmammoth9573 5 років тому +4

      As soon as someone calls him out..
      Sly boogie that'z mah name

    • @yeetwchybaban
      @yeetwchybaban 5 років тому +1

      @@themadmammoth9573 hmm

    • @sanjanabhuiyan926
      @sanjanabhuiyan926 5 років тому +1

      This means that Jack is not apparently ' LIKE A BOSS '

    • @r.p.6797
      @r.p.6797 5 років тому

      Genius until news articles claim they are deaf and blind to the truth

    • @sl4dja
      @sl4dja 5 років тому

      lmao just when i read your comment, he said that XD

  • @inutogegoogoogaga
    @inutogegoogoogaga 5 років тому +686

    "De knees are the weak point, De knees are the opening of the soul"
    Me being named Denise: i-

    • @senpaikaroo
      @senpaikaroo 5 років тому +14

      Underrated comment if I say so myself.

    • @iamdenish1342
      @iamdenish1342 5 років тому +6

      Never thought about that!😂

    • @mr.bighead903
      @mr.bighead903 5 років тому +6

      GOOSE IS COMING FOR YOU

    • @click3251
      @click3251 4 роки тому +1

      LMAO THE BEST COMMENT IVE EVER HEARD!

    • @kelismaincharacter4925
      @kelismaincharacter4925 2 роки тому

      This is the most funny original comment ever lmfao

  • @PlywoodPants
    @PlywoodPants 5 років тому +299

    “The knees are the weak points”
    - *That’s why Felix always goes for the knees of his enemies in battles and wins.*

    • @loopsjustloops7817
      @loopsjustloops7817 5 років тому +5

      Caroline A wut about the Achilles’ tendon

    • @Priyambada_kabi
      @Priyambada_kabi 5 років тому +18

      But Felix doesn't have knees, does it mean he's invincible?

    • @Kiwiqwp
      @Kiwiqwp 5 років тому +10

      @@Priyambada_kabi naw but he has elbows, elbows are knees, but mirrored

    • @creation500_9
      @creation500_9 5 років тому +1

      Felix doesn’t have legs so u can’t go for the knees!!

    • @wackyyyyyy-z7i
      @wackyyyyyy-z7i 5 років тому +1

      Why do I have to remind me of the lack of felix videos in youtube nowadays

  • @qassemalafoo
    @qassemalafoo 5 років тому +1027

    "Jacksepticeye is not responsible for anything Jacksepticeye says"
    This is like the UNO skip turn

  • @gh0stlyonyoutube
    @gh0stlyonyoutube 5 років тому +283

    6:00 we need a remix of Jack saying, “is that a chick, on a barrel, in the ocean?”

  • @doughytown4188
    @doughytown4188 5 років тому +41

    4:42
    "The gun is mightier than the sword." -Hol Horse from JoJo, right before he got rekked by Polnareff.

    • @TheKoriKasai
      @TheKoriKasai 5 років тому +2

      He even got rekt by his own gun

    • @theman6422
      @theman6422 5 років тому +1

      His stand is so good, that even it killed him

    • @armygamelover
      @armygamelover 5 років тому +2

      Except remember when Polnareff almost died because of Hol Horse and would have it it weren't for Avdol?

  • @empressjays7924
    @empressjays7924 5 років тому +451

    Jacksepticeye: playing TABS 💙❤
    Me: WHERE THE HELL IS ROGER ??!!!!!!!!

  • @ARCArmy
    @ARCArmy 5 років тому +680

    “GET HIS KNEES. GET HIS TOES”
    Sorry Jack. The only think you’re getting is:
    Da feet

  • @ariessnep
    @ariessnep 5 років тому +399

    6:25
    Listen, everyone, this is one of Jack’s most Irish moments when he’s talking so fast that you can barely understand anything he’s saying

    • @TheNastyMan1210
      @TheNastyMan1210 5 років тому +31

      I can understand him but that probably because I HAVE THE IRISH BLOOD IN ME AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!

    • @elrobsterjeff6040
      @elrobsterjeff6040 5 років тому +3

      I'm Scottish and I can understand

    • @imakang4roo218
      @imakang4roo218 5 років тому +3

      I can understand him and I’m not irish

    • @rivergaming2393
      @rivergaming2393 5 років тому +1

      I have a very tiny amount of Irish in my but I understood just fine go watch one of his old beamng drive episodes that's his true Irish

    • @overlordproductions1
      @overlordproductions1 5 років тому

      Lol

  • @glubmcflubflubs5833
    @glubmcflubflubs5833 5 років тому +202

    "Jacksepticeye is not responsible for everything that jacksepticeye says"
    -Jacksepticeye
    Me: WORDS OF WISDOM MY FRIENDS

    • @bastiaan1150
      @bastiaan1150 5 років тому +5

      Remove the “Me:” in the comment, and it would be alright.

    • @sjoerdjaspers
      @sjoerdjaspers 5 років тому +1

      I just died when I heard that XD

  • @zmf869
    @zmf869 5 років тому +395

    9:16
    Wouldn’t be a Jacksepticeye TABS video without a good old “HE DABBED!!!!!”

    • @jackiechan715
      @jackiechan715 5 років тому +1

      It'd be awesome to control a King who's being boosted by like 50 priests, and mow through the enemy yourself.

    • @brixxjack1255
      @brixxjack1255 5 років тому +1

      ZMF y

    • @gustavo_fridge
      @gustavo_fridge 5 років тому +1

      Pass STDs test

    • @Gabe77344
      @Gabe77344 5 років тому

      Jack pls don’t say ceaser because there was a guy called ceaser who stold my girl

    • @liloz2.078
      @liloz2.078 5 років тому

      THE OGS

  • @milan_gielis
    @milan_gielis 5 років тому +308

    Me: I have to study
    Sean: Here have some ragdolls going around in barrels and lifting each other with balloons
    Me, whilst clicking the video: what was I thinking about again

    • @amansiyad9346
      @amansiyad9346 5 років тому +2

      I got my computer exam tomorrow and yet, here i am.

    • @milan_gielis
      @milan_gielis 5 років тому +1

      @James McNay ey only two

    • @_theknighthawk_7018
      @_theknighthawk_7018 5 років тому +1

      😂 😂 😂

    • @dumbassclips
      @dumbassclips 5 років тому

      that is literally exactly the same thing that happened to me right now

    • @herculesknight1372
      @herculesknight1372 5 років тому

      Scary how this just happened today to me

  • @liambeel680
    @liambeel680 5 років тому +394

    How to beat a pirate:
    1: scurvy
    And if that doesn’t work:
    2: Valkyries

    • @notchbrine25
      @notchbrine25 5 років тому +14

      How to beat a pirate:
      Use a gun
      And if that don’t work,
      Use more gun

    • @imqr
      @imqr 5 років тому

      Notchbrine25 if a gun doesn’t work, use a stronghold gunpowder barrel to kill ‘em

    • @eoinmacdonnchadha5682
      @eoinmacdonnchadha5682 5 років тому

      That is how the british navy dealt with the buccaneers.

    • @breadpit4164
      @breadpit4164 5 років тому

      @@notchbrine25 is that a T E A M F O R T R E S S 2 refference??

    • @Chloe-ek3rx
      @Chloe-ek3rx 5 років тому

      @@imqr if that don't kill em...
      *One-Punch Man has entered the chat.*

  • @yoshidollface
    @yoshidollface 5 років тому +37

    Jack: When was the last time you flew with your feet?!
    Hermes: am I a joke to you

  • @SpittFiire
    @SpittFiire 5 років тому +183

    6:00 Its Chuck. He's following you Jack, be cautious.

    • @pagangamer87
      @pagangamer87 5 років тому +4

      Lol.. I was going to mention Chuck, but decided to check first to see if anyone thought the same xD

    • @stormfalcon3176
      @stormfalcon3176 5 років тому

      @@pagangamer87 Chuck is following Jack? Alright

    • @carmelitagonzalez4862
      @carmelitagonzalez4862 5 років тому

      Thats what I thought omg lol 😂

  • @bologna3048
    @bologna3048 5 років тому +184

    "...nubile baby that it is!"
    [Everyone's eyes darting around the room]

  • @bamacogdog6172
    @bamacogdog6172 5 років тому +229

    Jacksepticeye: "the biggest enemy today was WOOD!"
    *Me having a presentation*

  • @davidmunoz8171
    @davidmunoz8171 5 років тому +73

    8:13
    "When was the last time ye flew with yer feet?"
    Me: Well let's see. I drank a Redbull this morning, so I'd say about 10hrs ago.

    • @starrypines590
      @starrypines590 5 років тому +2

      Like, what? Am I s'possed to detach my feet when I fly?

    • @davidmunoz8171
      @davidmunoz8171 5 років тому +2

      @@starrypines590 what feet are we talking bout here?
      Defeat or... *THE* Feet?

    • @starrypines590
      @starrypines590 5 років тому +1

      @@davidmunoz8171 probably the feet, I don't know

  • @empiresloth
    @empiresloth 5 років тому +547

    Jack’s title: are ya ready kids?
    Copa: *interesting*
    Ty for the likes ❤️

  • @ziyad773
    @ziyad773 5 років тому +60

    "Jacksepticeye is not responsible for anything that jacksepticeye says"
    -jacksepticeye 2020

    • @bezeani8836
      @bezeani8836 5 років тому

      jacksepticeye is not responsible for this message

  • @tbreads7621
    @tbreads7621 5 років тому +246

    "Jacksepticeye is not responsible for anything said by Jacksepticeye."
    That's me whenever my art teacher catches my friends and I being crack headed.

  • @nahrikkon
    @nahrikkon 5 років тому +156

    “What are you going to do pray them to death?” *sunlight spear intensifies*

    • @kiro253
      @kiro253 5 років тому +3

      Xd *OP* miracle coming up!

    • @DaBigDonboom
      @DaBigDonboom 3 роки тому

      You have a for honor name and dark souls profile pic

    • @nahrikkon
      @nahrikkon 3 роки тому

      @@DaBigDonboom not from for honour

    • @DaBigDonboom
      @DaBigDonboom 3 роки тому

      @@nahrikkon then from what?

    • @nahrikkon
      @nahrikkon 3 роки тому

      @@DaBigDonboom mythology

  • @makayla6963
    @makayla6963 5 років тому +348

    13:07
    He’s obviously drawing an *Anti Sea-Bear Circle*

  • @xplosive4554
    @xplosive4554 5 років тому +138

    My parents when they hear me singing in the shower:
    *For F***s sake's Finbar. Why can't you just be normal?*

  • @pafcioo2703
    @pafcioo2703 5 років тому +109

    Editor: How many zooms do you want in this video
    Jack: Yes

    • @urielmorpheus
      @urielmorpheus 5 років тому +4

      Exactly, where did Robin go?

    • @spike120
      @spike120 5 років тому +1

      It reminds of Game Theory's live action segments where it zooms in on MatPat every other sentence just to keep the kids' attention.

    • @HeyTherePeter
      @HeyTherePeter 5 років тому +6

      Honestly I don't like that. It makes the video unwatchable for me idk why

    • @urielmorpheus
      @urielmorpheus 5 років тому +1

      @@spike120 Markiplier's video editor did the same, but it became annoying very fast.

    • @mikastis
      @mikastis 5 років тому +1

      @@urielmorpheus Lixyan does more of like face and/or voice deformations, and quotes and i much prefer that than the zooms. Only 40seconds in and im pretty sure there have been 5zooms in and sliding. Zooming in can be fun but this is too much

  • @cikgu_lindanasir2734
    @cikgu_lindanasir2734 5 років тому +101

    Jack :"little chicken on a barrel in the ocean"
    Me:"Its Chuck!?!!"

  • @Lesley_RedRhody
    @Lesley_RedRhody 5 років тому +144

    You know what I love about Seán? He doesn’t concede to barrages of demands.
    What I mean by that is I get the feeling that he brought back his Trademark Intro because *HE FEELS* like doing it again! Not due to any incessant nagging!
    I love the fact that he’s okay with retiring a series that he’s outgrown. I *equally* love the fact that he hasn’t been afraid to try new things for a couple of years now.
    I love the fact that he refuses to let people in the Community dictate what the color of his hair or length of his beard should be!
    I love that, even though Seán said- during this past Saturday’s Charity Stream for Australia- he kinda misses double uploads, I get the impression he’s not going to allow his mental health deteriorate in favor of returning *permanently* to that kind of exhausting schedule!
    Most of all, I love how happy Seán is, both personally and professionally!
    This has been my *Why I Love Seán TED Talk.* Thanks for listening.
    PS: I wonder how many videos he recorded after the Stream on Saturday... Cuz I get the distinct impression that this was one of them!
    💚🤗🤗💚

    • @afrokween8752
      @afrokween8752 5 років тому +5

      This comment deserves more likes!!!!

    • @Mandate_of_Heaven
      @Mandate_of_Heaven 5 років тому +2

      his comment section is the literal shitstain of UA-cam(sorry to say mate)

    • @zoeandrews7422
      @zoeandrews7422 5 років тому +4

      I just want my Irish boi to be happy and healthy. If he wants to do something despite the demand to do something else, I say let him go for it. We’ll love him no matter what

    • @Lesley_RedRhody
      @Lesley_RedRhody 5 років тому +1

      Miss Kynsy You’re very sweet! Thank you!
      💚🤗🤗💚

    • @afrokween8752
      @afrokween8752 5 років тому

      @@Mandate_of_Heaven I agree

  • @rubberdorkdude5225
    @rubberdorkdude5225 5 років тому +55

    7:43 Ain't nobody poonin' me
    Ain't nobody poonin' that Jack
    *Happy Wheels intensifies*

  • @qassemalafoo
    @qassemalafoo 5 років тому +23

    3:53
    Sean : "Good job love you *kiss* "
    Knight : " yamete septiceye-kun *blush* "

    • @j.436
      @j.436 5 років тому +2

      Weeb

    • @qassemalafoo
      @qassemalafoo 5 років тому +1

      @James McNay 😂😂😂😂

  • @timberwolf5422
    @timberwolf5422 5 років тому +86

    Jake: Is that a chicken?
    Everyone: Chuck has found his way into another game!?

  • @Echo-hg7gu
    @Echo-hg7gu 5 років тому +58

    6:00 JACK ITS CHUCK
    He followed all the way from Ireland to watch the battle!

    • @carmelitagonzalez4862
      @carmelitagonzalez4862 5 років тому

      what I thought lmao

    • @KPMilieu
      @KPMilieu 5 років тому +2

      Chuck sent the enemy!!! XD

    • @inaudible3381
      @inaudible3381 5 років тому +1

      @@KPMilieu Chuck IS the enemy

    • @KPMilieu
      @KPMilieu 5 років тому +1

      @@inaudible3381 Yes. He is the leader of the enemy. Therefore he sent ze enemy!!!

  • @HintsofVanillla
    @HintsofVanillla 5 років тому +104

    “They just took me out back and shot me like the dog I am.”
    *Peta intensifies*

  • @fangrose4664
    @fangrose4664 5 років тому +44

    Jack: when was the last time you flew with your feet!?
    *hermies entered the chat*

  • @CornB0b
    @CornB0b 5 років тому +13

    Jack: “Oh baby! I’m getting happy!!”
    Me: Oh is that what’s happening down there

  • @Chips308
    @Chips308 5 років тому +46

    6:08 we have General for ww3 boys and they call him Jacksepticeye

    • @Petrichor27284
      @Petrichor27284 5 років тому

      he doesnt care what the fo just gotta fuck em up

  • @sydlikgamingandcomedy22
    @sydlikgamingandcomedy22 5 років тому +274

    Jack: says nubile
    Everyone: writes articles
    UA-cam: demonetized

    • @sydlikgamingandcomedy22
      @sydlikgamingandcomedy22 5 років тому +3

      James McNay- it’s so true. We have to just deal with it!!! Nothing we can change

    • @_theknighthawk_7018
      @_theknighthawk_7018 5 років тому +3

      😂 😂 😂

    • @notben8592
      @notben8592 5 років тому +6

      Hotel? Trivago

    • @icebane8699
      @icebane8699 5 років тому +2

      James McNay nope not fair dummy

    • @r.p.6797
      @r.p.6797 5 років тому +3

      *meanwhile jaystation still has ads enabled and played*

  • @FriedBreadToastFish
    @FriedBreadToastFish 5 років тому +112

    Me: *gonna go to sleep*
    Sean: *post a vid about TABS*
    Me: Ay Ay Captain!

  • @mherrmann81687
    @mherrmann81687 5 років тому +78

    "JackSepticEye is not responsible for what JackSepticEye says"
    Me: OK... I guess I'll blame SÉAN then....

  • @ome0920
    @ome0920 5 років тому +9

    "what are you gonna do, pray them to death?"
    clearly jack hasn't heard of saint martha.

  • @Zeetarnation
    @Zeetarnation 5 років тому +47

    "Oh that was defeated faster than you lasted is bed last night"
    Jack, could you come for me like that...

  • @musa_adeel
    @musa_adeel 5 років тому +49

    Nobody:
    Jack: *hold on a fricker fracker*

  • @kevincampbell4544
    @kevincampbell4544 5 років тому +1

    Oh my god. Seeing the return of this series makes me so happy. The TABS episodes have been the very best episodes I've ever seen on your channel. I've never laughed harder than in these episodes

  • @maxhype2795
    @maxhype2795 5 років тому +76

    10:26 LADS LADS LADS LA-ds......oh no this could be the new LAUGH crow meme

  • @Priyambada_kabi
    @Priyambada_kabi 5 років тому +25

    This is my favorite series
    And also, Jack you should try the unit customizer mod. You could increase or decrease the size, attack speed, damage and health with it

  • @kissmeinuyashamylove
    @kissmeinuyashamylove 5 років тому +141

    “when was the last time you flew with your feet? never”
    Hermes: ok rude

    • @jdooms
      @jdooms 5 років тому +3

      Flew with his shoes didn't he?

    • @DanPrime98
      @DanPrime98 5 років тому +1

      SpazztasticKiwi Namor: I FLY WITH MY FEET ALL THE TIME YOU FOOLISH SURFACE DWELLER!!!

    • @gli_chee_draws
      @gli_chee_draws 5 років тому +2

      Ah...
      _I see that you're a man of culture as well...-_

    • @mherrmann81687
      @mherrmann81687 5 років тому +2

      My thought exactly!!
      Hermes/Mercury

    • @mherrmann81687
      @mherrmann81687 5 років тому

      @@DanPrime98 technically he swims.... Flying is in the air.
      Namor and other Atlanteans propel themselves into the air like dolphins and whales; even GWsharks and crocodillians can jump out of the water.
      But unfortunately, even FLYING FISH do not technically fly; they glide a short distance out of the water on their oversized pectoral fins. Still not flying though....

  • @rosswatson9254
    @rosswatson9254 5 років тому +30

    6:02 the hjonkening has arrived
    Hjonk hjonk am goose

  • @vink9339
    @vink9339 5 років тому +96

    13:07 hes drawing his anti-sea-bear circle in the sand

    • @theaquaticadventurer5602
      @theaquaticadventurer5602 5 років тому

      Plagerizer

    • @theaquaticadventurer5602
      @theaquaticadventurer5602 5 років тому

      Someone literally directly above you commented the same thing at an earlier date. Shameless. I least try, man.

    • @vink9339
      @vink9339 5 років тому +1

      @@theaquaticadventurer5602 well I didn't see they're comment. It's not like people search to see if something has been posted in a comments section before commenting as multiple people usually have the same idea. For example I just now saw another anti sea bear comment that was posted an hour after my comment.

    • @vink9339
      @vink9339 5 років тому +1

      @@theaquaticadventurer5602 wait are you referring to the comment by Makayla that you then said you choked on your food reading? That one was posted after mine 😂😂 mine was 21hours ago and theirs was 20 hours ago. Either way it doesn't matter

    • @theaquaticadventurer5602
      @theaquaticadventurer5602 5 років тому +2

      @@vink9339 oh......oh ...I'm dumb. I'm sorry. I'm just gonna remove the foot from my mouth now. My bad, dude.

  • @okuyasunijimura4917
    @okuyasunijimura4917 5 років тому +49

    "I shouldn't even possess my own focken' BRAIN!!!"
    Jacksepticeye 2020

  • @GraexPlayz
    @GraexPlayz 5 років тому +45

    Jack: cannons first!
    Me knowing he can contol one and go for cannons himself: Shame

  • @peds9260
    @peds9260 5 років тому +14

    "is that a chicken? in a barrel? in the ocean?"
    IT'S CHUCK RUN

  • @NakaJhon
    @NakaJhon 5 років тому +94

    Jack: "F 'em up! F 'em up! O o... O o... Oooowwww" 'Defeat'
    😂

  • @amnathegrande
    @amnathegrande 5 років тому +31

    Me: K, I've got a test tomorrow, lemme revise real quick-
    *_"TABS have entered the chat."_*

  • @aceofhearts2843
    @aceofhearts2843 5 років тому +57

    Jacksepticeye: are you ready kids?
    Me: EYE EYE CAPTAIN JACK

  • @Fille_bs1
    @Fille_bs1 5 років тому +8

    Coppa: ”sees title”
    Also Coppa: I’m about to end this mans whole career.

  • @BobBob-zg5lz
    @BobBob-zg5lz 5 років тому +62

    Alternative title: Jack brings the crusade to the beaches

  • @camramaster
    @camramaster 5 років тому +32

    "What can beat pirates?"
    .... Ninjas. Why didn't you pick ninjas?

    • @IndigoStorm27
      @IndigoStorm27 5 років тому

      That's an *OLD* meme.

    • @AhmedEx1.
      @AhmedEx1. 5 років тому

      @@IndigoStorm27 what meme? I think he was referencing ninjago
      Or that's how it goes in the game I may be wrong

    • @pennylenny5
      @pennylenny5 5 років тому

      Tuber simulator moment

    • @IndigoStorm27
      @IndigoStorm27 5 років тому

      @@AhmedEx1. Pirates vs Ninjas. *WAAAY* back in the early days of memes.

  • @imran_huseyn
    @imran_huseyn 5 років тому +108

    "Totally *Acuurate* Battle Simulator"
    Thats a pretty accurate title

    • @1Gidget
      @1Gidget 5 років тому +4

      Intaxian Mapper such an ackurate title

    • @risinika2800
      @risinika2800 5 років тому

      Very accurate

    • @braidenj152
      @braidenj152 5 років тому +1

      I knew something seemed off lol

    • @b4nditm394
      @b4nditm394 5 років тому

      Lol

    • @valiang8867
      @valiang8867 5 років тому

      Intaxian Mapper Technically U is just a sleeping C

  • @zerro6401
    @zerro6401 5 років тому +34

    Me: "doctor i think i have cancer"
    Doctor: "cancer won't matter......WHEN YOUR DEAD!!!"

    • @bomoore9872
      @bomoore9872 5 років тому

      😬Why that was quite offensive. Seán would not approve

    • @unny8877
      @unny8877 5 років тому

      Grammatically incorrect, offensive, and not even remotely a joke. 0/10

    • @dragonlorddracodenblaze
      @dragonlorddracodenblaze 5 років тому

      F

  • @Ainlee4
    @Ainlee4 5 років тому +80

    “I do not condone the sentence I just said”
    Me realizing everything I say is garbage

    • @fring9594
      @fring9594 5 років тому +1

      You don't seem fine

    • @crimson_king5838
      @crimson_king5838 5 років тому +1

      Omg ur at 69 likes noice

    • @Ainlee4
      @Ainlee4 5 років тому

      Holy shit. Just now seeing this! Thank you everyone!!

    • @Ainlee4
      @Ainlee4 5 років тому

      Fring I definitely wasn’t when I wrote this lol

  • @K9Stallion
    @K9Stallion 5 років тому +13

    "I'm sorry
    ARE YOU SHOOTING INTO SPAAAAAAACE!?"
    favorite line

  • @mckennanorrod4919
    @mckennanorrod4919 5 років тому +27

    "Is that a chicken on a barrel in the ocean?" 😂

    • @lordstrnge3714
      @lordstrnge3714 5 років тому +6

      Chuck made an appearance to cause chaos

  • @joshjr2080
    @joshjr2080 5 років тому +146

    Jack claims he has no PHDs but the man is forgetting he is a whale biologist

    • @kobaltapollodorus8922
      @kobaltapollodorus8922 5 років тому +4

      That's an OG reference right there

    • @DeathWolf-qn1kg
      @DeathWolf-qn1kg 5 років тому

      Good reference

    • @Phi_Lix
      @Phi_Lix 4 роки тому

      KobaltApollodorus Am I missing something? What’s the joke?

    • @kobaltapollodorus8922
      @kobaltapollodorus8922 4 роки тому +3

      @@Phi_Lix Some years ago, Jack had a couple of running jokes in his videos. Key among these jokes are these:
      Screaming "Speed is Key" when playing Happy Wheels.
      Claiming that he was the last surviving member of an alien species called the "Bossatrons" from the planet "Bossatronia" (which is why he says "hit that like button LIKE A BOSS" in his outros)
      and Claiming that he is a whale biologist.
      You'll probably find some of these if you go watching his older videos when he used to film in a cabin with a cap on his head.

    • @Phi_Lix
      @Phi_Lix 4 роки тому +1

      KobaltApollodorus Oh ok thanks,yeah I’m not exactly a old viewer I recently came back jacksepticeye.

  • @aaliyahevett6260
    @aaliyahevett6260 5 років тому +74

    Jack: *says renegade 3 times”
    Me: you’ve summoned charli damileo

    • @petermacgregor691
      @petermacgregor691 5 років тому +6

      aaliyah evett oh good god, not satan herself

    • @zyzyfuss
      @zyzyfuss 5 років тому +3

      @@petermacgregor691 I think that title belongs to kyler

  • @Dodger24
    @Dodger24 5 років тому +16

    Sean: When was the last time you flew with your feet? Never!
    *Hermes has entered the chat*

  • @loganfrandrup6590
    @loganfrandrup6590 5 років тому +27

    Yeah, you missed a lot Jack lol
    btw: I would not recommend modding quite yet, there are still the spooky faction and there are more secret units to find, LOTS more from last time you played.

  • @ughitsanni
    @ughitsanni 5 років тому

    i've honestly missed you playing tabs, its one of my fave series you've done, bc its so much fun! i love to see you just fuck around.

  • @CapyMartinBara
    @CapyMartinBara 5 років тому +15

    "I dont know, you make up a reason I dont have one"
    I hope to one day use this quote

    • @Skinned_fried_n_cut_up_potato
      @Skinned_fried_n_cut_up_potato 5 років тому +1

      Martin XY *gets pulled over* “ so are you aware that you are over the speed limit?”

    • @CapyMartinBara
      @CapyMartinBara 5 років тому +1

      @@Skinned_fried_n_cut_up_potato
      This can go many ways, either I get a ticket with a warning, a new friend or a night in a cell

  • @suchdeepbedi9679
    @suchdeepbedi9679 5 років тому +46

    Jack:catapults
    Me: *coughs* *TREBUCHETS*

    • @alexstapleton6339
      @alexstapleton6339 5 років тому +1

      Nah, those are catapults

    • @bordeandavid1991
      @bordeandavid1991 5 років тому +1

      @@alexstapleton6339 r/whooooosh

    • @jss1328
      @jss1328 5 років тому +1

      @@alexstapleton6339 r/woosh

    • @alexstapleton6339
      @alexstapleton6339 5 років тому

      Bossul Gigel nah I know the memes. I just occasionally have some trouble with knowing when someone is joking. Text is hard like that.

  • @Dale7thSigner
    @Dale7thSigner 5 років тому +33

    "the knees are the weakpoints"
    yep dont take an arrow to the knee, specially cannonballs 😂

    • @_theknighthawk_7018
      @_theknighthawk_7018 5 років тому +1

      😂 😂 😂

    • @cheesed-kun8445
      @cheesed-kun8445 5 років тому

      It’s better than taking a nuclear missile to the knee

    • @ADAJ342
      @ADAJ342 5 років тому

      "I used to be an adventurer like you, until I took an arrow to the knee..."

  • @lmao2351
    @lmao2351 5 років тому +1

    You Should combine balloon shooting guys with normal shooting thingies cuz balloon guys dont do That much damage, they just paralize.

  • @producerjjones9976
    @producerjjones9976 5 років тому +79

    "It's the siege of Gettysburg all over again."
    The battle of Gettysburg was not a siege.

    • @producerjjones9976
      @producerjjones9976 5 років тому +3

      @@masmarvelous sorry, I'm just a history buff

    • @Frostyboi9955
      @Frostyboi9955 5 років тому +2

      Yeah let jackaboy have fun

    • @tungstenelephant9849
      @tungstenelephant9849 5 років тому +1

      Clearly he knows nothing of the monstrosity of a failure that was the Battle of Gettysburg, come to think of it, I wonder if he knows that it was in the American Civil War?

    • @miles8307
      @miles8307 5 років тому

      Basicly almost

    • @urinetrouble0543
      @urinetrouble0543 5 років тому

      Tungsten Elephant do you know the Easter rising?

  • @user-di8mo2mu2n
    @user-di8mo2mu2n 5 років тому +39

    *Jack* :
    Jacksepticeye is not responsible for anything Jacksepticeye says.
    *also Jack:*
    Totally *Acuurate* Battle Simulator

  • @bennguyen1496
    @bennguyen1496 5 років тому +77

    Jack: “I’m not bringing any old game back”
    TABS: *im about to end this mans whole career*

  • @protoss__ssotorp
    @protoss__ssotorp 5 років тому +4

    15:54
    Jack: Not just the men, but the women, and the children too.
    Me: a surprise to be sure, but a welcome one.

  • @nushunnume2150
    @nushunnume2150 5 років тому +46

    2:37 Sans,is that you?

    • @troycrafter7430
      @troycrafter7430 5 років тому +5

      Thank god I'm not the only one who got it

  • @subchallengefrank
    @subchallengefrank 5 років тому +12

    11:37 Jack when your dead!
    Jack when he joins the army in ww3 and comes home with no arms.
    Just a flesh wound

  • @minidisx
    @minidisx 5 років тому +72

    Jacksepticeye's title: Are You Ready *Kids?*
    *COPPA* : Well, We Are!

    • @johnwill4930
      @johnwill4930 5 років тому +3

      DANGIT COPPA
      Coppa probably gave birth to donald trump

    • @johnwill4930
      @johnwill4930 5 років тому +1

      Can i get a
      CHICKEN NUGGET

    • @inaudible3381
      @inaudible3381 5 років тому +2

      @@johnwill4930 CHICKEN NUGGET

    • @chimerae
      @chimerae 5 років тому +1

      Hunter Kapitan ChInKeN nUgGeT fUnNy!!!!1!!

  • @psychoalert6551
    @psychoalert6551 5 років тому +2

    13:05, the dudes drawing a circle in the sand to keep out the seabears

  • @Verxzye
    @Verxzye 5 років тому +28

    "are ya ready kids"
    thats what the man in the candy van said

  • @BatsBeyondStar
    @BatsBeyondStar 5 років тому +22

    Jack: places viking valkyrie's
    Also Jack: FOR IRELAND
    whatever floats your boat i guess...

    • @JohnyMCness
      @JohnyMCness 5 років тому +1

      Hey i mean..at a time both of em would want to conquer england or smthing so it kinda fits?

    • @Priyambada_kabi
      @Priyambada_kabi 5 років тому

      I think there were vikings in Ireland too 🤔

    • @JohnyMCness
      @JohnyMCness 5 років тому +2

      @@Priyambada_kabi probably at some point those madlads went everywhere to find food and other ressources after they were declined the option of trading due to beeing "infidels" i think thats the word for ppl that dont believe in the same religion right?

    • @BatsBeyondStar
      @BatsBeyondStar 5 років тому

      Well, i have been proven wrong

  • @justjohn1109
    @justjohn1109 5 років тому +16

    Jack: this is way better than anything else I've done with my life
    *Sad sam noises*

  • @Onyxhurricane
    @Onyxhurricane 5 років тому +1

    This was one of the wildest, silliest videos Jack's done in a bit and I fecking love it. Cheers mates!

  • @RealKyklops
    @RealKyklops 5 років тому +22

    Jacksepticeye: What would Caesar do?
    Me: Caesar Zeppel-
    Jacksepticeye: What would ALEXANDER do?
    Me: oh alright then.

    • @chaudhrykanwalijaz995
      @chaudhrykanwalijaz995 5 років тому

      Hahahahahahaha Soo truuee I thought of him the moment he said his name.

    • @chaudhrykanwalijaz995
      @chaudhrykanwalijaz995 5 років тому

      Now that I think about it. Whenever a name is said of a smd I relate it to jojo Soo faasst

    • @DragonGunzDorian
      @DragonGunzDorian 5 років тому

      CAESAAAAAAAR!

  • @silver_dem0n525
    @silver_dem0n525 5 років тому +60

    *When you're bored so you open youtube and suddenly this gem pops up*

  • @lmnvslight6356
    @lmnvslight6356 5 років тому +4

    Waitress: and here’s your food.
    Jack: **vacuum noises**

  • @theimpossiblethespian6974
    @theimpossiblethespian6974 5 років тому

    Jack is truly the Gaelic Gladiator, because all you need to do is put Jack in any battle scenario and his ultimate passionate Irishness increases by 3000%

  • @nighthawk2203
    @nighthawk2203 5 років тому +11

    "The knees are the opening to the soul"
    -Jacksepticeye 2020

  • @Ali107
    @Ali107 5 років тому +11

    Sean: Catapult
    Felix: Trebuchet

    • @ivanimations9621
      @ivanimations9621 5 років тому +1

      im probably the only sado that thought up a bfb reference... idk if to share it or not...

  • @Handle_666
    @Handle_666 5 років тому +11

    Jack: DON'T WRITE WHAT I SAY! Me: time to add another note! Jack: *TRIGGERED ITENSTIFIES* Me: *TIME TO SPAWN 10,000 BEARS NOW!* Jack: NOOOOOOO

  • @whimsily2
    @whimsily2 4 роки тому +1

    'balloon archers'
    completely changes the definition of 'tying the balloon to your hand'

  • @bazabuga3257
    @bazabuga3257 5 років тому +27

    "Jacksepticeye is not responsible for anything Jacksepticeye says."
    So, his whole channel is a lie to us

  • @chevycarguy3056
    @chevycarguy3056 5 років тому +39

    3:08 Jack: Steven! What are you doing?!?
    Me with the name of Steven: I’m trying my best boss! I’m sorry!

  • @Red-jl1qr
    @Red-jl1qr 5 років тому +33

    "Can you win? Shor-u-kin!"
    **silence**

  • @knightmare_346
    @knightmare_346 5 років тому +3

    "is that a giant pirate cannon, or are you just happy to see me"
    Jacksepticeye 2020

  • @You-sw7tm
    @You-sw7tm 5 років тому +7

    *Jack bringing back his signature 'top of the morning laddies' intro*
    ME: 😁

  • @RottenDirector1
    @RottenDirector1 5 років тому +16

    0:30
    Jacksepticeye is not responsible for anything jacksepticeye says.
    bruh... thats a paradox

  • @slimslim3113
    @slimslim3113 5 років тому +56

    Teacher: Does anyone know what pirates used when fighting
    Me: CATAPULTS
    results: 0/5

  • @rakoon6351
    @rakoon6351 5 років тому +1

    Sean: "fuck 'im up"
    My brain: "fUcK 'iM uP kEvIn, FuCk 'iM uP"