When To Move out of Your Parent's House
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- Опубліковано 15 вер 2024
- Are you ready to move out? How much should you save before doing so? Have you considered the impact on the total net worth of you and your parents combined? There are a lot of considerations and sometimes you cannot make the best decision financially due to your relationship with your parents. Let me offer some advice on things to consider to help you make a sound decision.
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Economically stay as long as you can, but sometimes freedom is worth the extra cost
Depends on your relationship with your parents. I know sometimes it can be terrible.
Michael King HELL YES. I did not want to be in my parents business anymore or have them in mine. Worked multiple jobs and got my own place. It’s called freedom.
MK I had bad depression living with my parents. Now that I’ve moved out I’m so much happier
in the end every moment we use is life time. what is more worth save a little or live as own shadow. i try to move out too. wish me luck.
Freedom is definitely worth money, people tend to underestimate this
according to my calculations, my mental health and sanity is worth the price of moving out from my (asian) parents
Some people enjoy living with parents. It's a huge cost to have your own place so choose wisely.
RuyBlas
oof
RuyBlas definitely
I moved back into my parents house after college to pay off my 40k of student loans, who cares what other people think about it. 80% of americans are broke. I moved back with my parents paid off 40k worth of student loans in 1 year, now im ready to take on the world. Dont let others influence the way to live life. -Brad
Agreed
brad lee --- 👑 you da man brother
brad lee Yes! Definitely agree with this. Moving back in with my parents after college really helped me too.
I totally agree with you, Brad. If you want to worry about what people think, worry about what they'll think when everyone's in their 40s and beyond, and they're broke and you have financial freedom. At that point, they may wish they had been wiser with their money at a young age and envy your level of financial freedom.
Great job hun!
I personally love living on my own. I was depressed living with my parents. I’m so much happier now and my relationship with my family is actually better.
Sometimes, you can go crazy living with someone indeed.
I'm not home much, so I'm perfectly fine going back home to sleep and what not
I help out around the house and my parents and I get a free place to live, so it's a win win
I got thrown out at the age of 14, I lived in the streets for 2 years. Then I got a job and worked my self up from there. Today I have my own place and I even got a wife. If you ever feel like life is not worth it, just try to think positive.
PS. I’m 27 now
Wow... what kind of parents do that? Sorry to hear you had to go through that. I cannot imagine the circumstances.
Yeah, I lived in a kind of abusive home with fucked up parents, but, you know, life is life
Oh man...
R2 Strikes pretty sure that is literally illegal u should've called child services
I lived with my Dad until I was 25, saving for a house. I moved into my new house on my 25th birthday.
That is a great way to save if you parents are okay with you staying. Some parents would rather you get out of the house. lol.
what was your down payment
I completely agree with this idea. However, it comes with some risk. I've seen way too many recent college grads use the opportunity to live at home as a way to blow as much cash as they can on things they normally wouldn't be able to afford (like fancy cars and clothes etc). This eventually leads to them having poor money management skills when they do eventually move out. A method my friend's family used was he was allowed to stay at home so long as he paid rent that they determined reasonable. They then put that money in an interest bearing savings account, and when it came time for him to move out they gave him all the money he previously paid as rent as a down payment for a house. The son gets a down payment and learns some fiscal responsibility. A win win.
That can happen anyway. Plenty of independent folks manage money poorly. Parents just need to lay down expectations and levy consequences. Poor parenting has the same effect when kids move out. They call home and ask for money. The same parents give it up, while complaining. That's stupid.
xjado654 if theyre irresponsible, it's probably too begin with and living on their own won't help that
xjado654 a
Very smart idea
This exactly what happened to me... I was spoiled and moved out at 24 and realized I had such high standards that I had very poor money management with an below average pay.
I wish I had a choise to stay or to move out(( shout out to people living in abusive homes
Oh... sometimes you do not have a choice. =/
Salute!
Sara Lyud i left home at 6am on my 18th birthday. i knew i had my late mother’s estate and my late father was a nightmare. i’m not sure how long it’s been for you to have made that choice; but it does get better. i made my peace with my late father the day he died. i don’t have any regrets. the saddest was my children had no grandparents to bond with. i’m just thrilled G-d gave me a grandchild to spoil and love. i’ll put all those things my children missed into one little girl. i’ve already paid for her college, Auburn or Alabama then Harvard or MIT. those are her choices. i hope i’m there to watch her graduate.
Absolutely ! I left when I was 16 and moved 5 states away
Sara Lyud Hope you get out soon , Jesus loves you 💕💕💕 keep pushing sis
I'll be honest I didn't move out until 6 months before marrying my wife. I was 27 at at the time. Don't regret it one bit because we were able to buy our first home a few months after getting married and now we are well ahead of a lot of our peers financially.
Being able to live at home was one of the best opportunities and decisions my wife and I ever made financially. Wouldn't have changed a thing about that. I encourage others to live at home as long as possible while saving as much as possible if you have good relationship with your parents.
See.... thanks for your confirmation. =D
it's totally the opposit here, especially for women. in morocco a non married woman can't leave until she get married. i mean the normal is to live with parents. i've decide to broke the rule and it's been a year and half since i live alone it's amazing how we start to grow up when we leave the childhood ground , i'm a loner the hard part was about to leave with strangers (not enough money to have my own house so i use to leave with other women !). after 2 amazing experiences in wich i've learned how to deal with others cause befor those experienes i use to ignore everyone who just can't fit in my little world . now i leave all alone ( thanks god after moving to another town i can afford this now). i appreciate that you treat a variety of subjects.
noura benzaide Wow you have guts I'm from Somali background and practising Islam. If your a single women without kids you have flexibility but living on your own has pros and cons it's all about what's your worth while
My parents wanted me to stay forever. LOL.
I had to get out of there. I did wait until I was abt 22 (after college), but I moved out and have been independent ever since.
Lol, you only need to move out if you feel the need to. Maybe they were driving you crazy.
Another comment addressed the same issue. I love my parents to death, and I do not take them for granted at all, but sooner or later I really needed my freedom.
I'm from the Philippines. Here, it's common to be living with your parents until you get married. Some even opt to still live with their parents even if they've gotten married (often for those who have bigger properties, i.e. house and lot). I guess it's cultural thing (close family ties) and also being practical (lot alone is too expensive especially in the capital where most jobs are located. Also, most real estate developments are at least 2 hrs away from Manila. I have friends who have gotten properties in those areas but still opt to rent where their jobs are near).
I can be considered way too old to still be living with my parents, but I'm single, debt-free (slowly building my savings, and hopefully investments soon), and enjoy being with my parents (I hope they enjoy having me around too. haha). I share with household expenses. So far, I see only 2 downsides: I get stressed with all their physical clutter but can't impose my "minimalist living" beliefs, and even at xx yrs old, I still need to inform them of my whereabouts. Of course I'd want to live independently, but for now, I'm just truly grateful for the time to enjoy my parents' company and the opportunity they give me to save financially.
There are pros and cons to it. Your particular situations can make the pros outweigh the cons. I'm hearing that a lot for people in Asian countries as well as Saudi Arabia. Seems like US is the only strange country that has this norm.
I was adopted from the Philippines and was brought to the US. My non biological family (my father who is Filipino and my mother who is german), are immigrants and were both raised to stay at home for as long as they can. But here in America everyone pushes you to move out at a certain age. And ironically enough my own family thought so too, even though they were raised to stay home with family. Even in America from different backgrounds, I live a very stigmatized life.
Our family lived in India as cultural researchers, and one thing we observed was the joint family system, where often multiple generations live together. We didn't initially do that, but a few years after our daughter got married, my husband and I realized that we really had more room than we need. For instance, we hardly ever even went into our finished basement. I got the idea for my husband and me to move into the basement, and our daughter and son-in-law to move into the top floor. They could use one bedroom as a bedroom, another as an office, and the third bedroom as a living room. Long story short, they did that three months ago, and it's worked great. They pay us rent for space we weren't using, but the rent is much cheaper than they would pay anywhere else. We also share the cooking responsibilities. Whoever cooks buys the groceries for the meal they prepare. We eat better and cheaper than we were before. I think this has worked well for us because we all have separate spaces, with there being three different levels to the house. We literally treat the separate floors like separate apartments. For instance, we never go to the other couple's "apartment" without permission. We share the main floor of the home, but can definitely be alone if we want. I'm not sure how long we'll do this, but for now it's definitely a wise move financially for everyone involved, so I'm guessing at least a year or two. At that point they may buy their own place and my husband and I may downsize. I do think there are many benefits to the multiple generations living together, even when people are married, so long as there are proper boundaries in place.
Simple Suburban Living the one thing i do miss from where i grew up, New England, my grandparents and many aunts and uncles all lived close by. much more a nuclear family then the spread all over the world type family i have now. my closest family member now is 900 miles away.
Jobelle Collie, I do think it's nice when family can, at the very least, live close together. It's been quite a few years now, but at one point my mom lived across the street from one of her sisters, could see another sister's home from bedroom window, and was about a mile away from another sister. They were all elderly, and it was a nice feeling for me to know that she had her sisters so close to her. I know that sometimes family relationships can be complicated, but at the same time, there is nothing like family when it comes to being there for each other throughout the years.
Simple Suburban Living, I can vouch for you! I'm Bengali from the UK and we tend to have a really collectivist culture, even though we live in the UK. I feel like I'm trapped between the individualistic culture of the UK and collectivist culture of my culture, it's quite mind-boggling really.
In Vancouver B.C, where majority are Asian (Chinese), and house prices are incredibly high (unaffordable), living with your parents is actually a very common practice. Though there is still some stigma around it, it's also very understandable.
Seems like it's A O K in Vancouver. =D Mostly.
Sigh... watching this video brings to light how bad with money I am. I should have been payed off my student loans and other debts... I've been living with my mom for YEARS...
imsome007 i've reach a point in wich i didn't really had the choice. i was trying to have a normal life i mean : a man a family children but the thing was that i wasnt really enjoying being married to please others or to have a title i'm a dreamer...so i left all this behind me, it came with a price mine is to spend my time alone but it's ok; if i can't have what i want it's not a reason to have what others want for me.give it a push!
Hmmm.... might be where you spent the money while living with your parents. Even if you live at home, you still need to work at not spending much and paying off all those debts.
Sounds like you didn't like your situation and made a stand to improve it. Doing is better than complaining and not doing anything about it.
imsome007 get to work
Spoiler alert: as I was quite spoilt and stayed with my parents through college and even into my first job. They didn't charge me rent and all I needed to do was pay for my things once I started earning. I saved a significant portion of my income because I don't go out a lot and also I don't like the thought of spending lots of money. I did not feel ashamed about my situation because it's actually quite normal in my area for children to live with parents for quite a bit of time - up until marriage. Only when I started consciously learning about wealth building did I realise that in America, my situation would have been frowned upon. I am really grateful that my parents didn't charge me rent while I was earning. They said it was no problem having me, and also let me know there's no moving back 😂
I've been giving this issue some thought lately, you read my mind! I am 25 and still live at home, but I live in the UK and I think there is less pressure nowadays to move out the family home. I do pay rent but am trying to save as much as I can so I can have my own place one day. Property prices here are high and a lot of my friends still live at home.
Still with my parents, they love it. I saved up 20% for my down payment, and helping my parents with their mortgage. I can travel whenever I want, and be spontaneous with my spending. I really don't care about what other people think......:) life is good.
You have a good attitude on this. Good for you! That gives you a huge leg up on life. =D
Lived with my mother after college until I was 30. I worked a low-paying publishing job in NYC and just wanted to save money. Also, I loved my mom and I was able to help her out with house upkeep and chores and some monthly rent fee. Saved up money over these years and I finally found a tiny rental apt in NYC and moved out. It was a win-win situation.
Exactly. It seems people in the US just wants to be on their own when there are many financial advantages to living together. Some negatives toot hough.
BeatTheBush You switched sides!!! Sitting position that is. Great Topic. This one will really help those questioning and contemplating the subject. 100k subscribers soon. Cheers@!!
Ahhhh so close but also so far away. Yeah! It's nearing there. I'm so excited! The couch cushions needed some evening out. =D
I'm 30 and just now preparing to move out of my folks home. As a hardcore pragmatist, I couldn't care less about social stigma. I'm lucky to have supportive parents who encouraged me to pursue my passion as an animator, and now I work full time on my own business that also employs my girlfriend, and we've had animated music videos shown on Cartoon Network, and done tour visuals for bands like The Red Hot Chili Peppers and Incubus.
If I followed the stereotypical advice of going to college I'd be dealing with student loan debt - dodged that bullet by teaching my self animation for free thanks to UA-cam!
Not going to college and not moving out when I wasn't ready are the best financial decisions I ever made.
Don't worry about social status - it's overrated and 100% not worth the consequences on your bank account.
That is, if you are strong enough to ignore the social pressures. It helps to just not tell people where you live too.
Thank you for the video. I agree. Im in the situation where I live with my parents. Im 32, Latino, I have an education with no student loans or debt, I have a decent paying job, not married, no kids, and I dont pay rent. Many may think that im a loser or moocher. But im far from that. If I had it my way believe me I would love to own my own house and have my own space but I live in a very expensive area in D.C. I have a great relationship with my parents and I help out around the house as well as take care of them. Every month I save $1,000. Ive already saved a good amount. I figured I should take advantage of the situation while I can. I calculated that in two years Ill have $50,000 saved if I stay on the same track. Im pretty good with money and have a strict budget. I often feel ashamed that im still home but just having that nice saving buffer gives me piece of mind and more financial freedom. I know I wont live with my family forever and so im just preparing. I do see how some people think its stupid to live at home at my age but thats only if you're a jobless, lazy, un motivated individual with no plan IMO.
It does have a social stigma to live at home but it really gets you a leg up on your finances and to be able to buy your own home later on through the savings. Apparently, in Asian countries, this is the norm.
You’re not a loser, infact you are playing smart!
im in the same boat an i live in the bay area so you know im struggling to find place lol i do wanna move out before i turn 30 though ( which is in couple years)
I'm 20 and sleeping on the couch. I got to get out of here ASAP!
J Padron
Did you leave?
J Padron
Did you leave?
Did you leave?
Thank you for taking my request and making a video on this!! :D
I just graduated high school & I'm going to community college which is 15mins away from my house & I will be staying till I finish my 2 years.
That seems perfectly normal to me.
Austin B you have to do full 4 years or u only have 2 years left ?
Cool.
I think it’s good to stay at home as long as you can, but it does put a strain on your dating life.
I moved out of my parents place in my late 20s.. because I wanted to sleep around and invite my friends over more often... looking back The benefit is not really worth the cost... The best thing to do in my opinion is to buy an investment property while you live with your parents... then move out into whatever you can afford.. Having a good relationship with your parents is a powerful thing I didn't really take full advantage of... especially if you don't have debt in the first place
The expense is indeed large over multiple years... $20k/year in rent or so X 5 years = $100k right there.
I think that if you are unable to provide basic maintenance for your yourself such as do your own laundry, do your own bath(buy your own shampoo, etc.,); do your own clothes, make up your bed, go shopping... basic life skills if you do not have them living with your parents will only hinder you. I don't care how much money you save if you do have them and your parents want you around and/or they're elderly then pay them back by helping them! Whatever you do do not live with them and contribute nothing that's just a free ride and it will not prepare you for what the future holds. In my opinion, it will set you back socially much more than getting ahead financially will do.
I live with my mom still and I am in my 30s! I already told her I am not leaving until I get married (who knows when). I do pay comparable rent prices in South San Francisco, but the money is going to my mom and the house that will be passed down eventually, and not some rando landlord. I think it's a win all around. The bay area is too expensive to live out on my own. Rather use my earnings elsewhere. My caucasian relatives are always appalled that I am still here. lol! btw great videos! I have been watching a bunch.
Appalled due to the rent prices or living at home? Ha ha... well.. you can at least try to work out to save more for your own place no?
That I am still living at home. Yup I am saving for sure! I'm not spending the $4K it takes to live in a SF shoebox
I’m 30 also and married with a kid and puppy and still living with my parents..not paying anything becuz where in debt! Hopefully get out of debt soon so we can save for a house💕
Mandi Fahzy yeah that is wise. It is also applied to most Asian families, no wonder why we have much better relationship with parents, and have bigger savings than the Westerners despite lower incomes
did you get married?
this video really put me at ease, I'm thankful that my parents are supportive a long as I'm going to school lol.
Nothing wrong with staying at home as that will get you a huge boost in starting your life.
Being in Asia myself, yup, many do stay with parents til they get married. True that theres much savings and on top of that family members can look after each other. At the sacrifice of a little bit of freedom, theres much to gain. Also many still hold on to family values and fsmily ties that continue on as the children goes out to set up their own families and build their own nests. Much of the values are being eroded now in exchange for non traditional ideas.
But yes property prices are also insane here, especially in Singapore where I'm at!
Oh yes.. million+ in Singapore for a simple home. Crazy. But then average salary for people in Singapore is so insanely high. It's a very hmmm... high performing country on average.
BeatTheBush true
I'm getting very old, but I plan to live with my parents forever until they want to kick me out. :D If I make enough for a place one day I'll buy it & rent it out but still live with my parents.
I think you forgot to mention.. In traditional Asian families sometimes it's seen as ungrateful to ditch your parents. I don't know about married off peoples , but they're still suppose to take care of their parents and have them live together. I think. You're from HK you probably know better than me. Right. I'm not sure.
Moving out at 18 is a very Americanized thing, basically not moving back after college, you're suppose to be able to afford your own place after college. But that's really back in the days.. now a days, a serious amount of people can't afford anything after college.
The most feasible way is to get married and both parties participate in paying for a house together. Finding your other part is also another challenge. Oh well, I'm lucky to have my parents to leech on to for now :D No regrets here ;D
Very true. For asian people it's not leave at 18 but rather take care of your parents in their old age. Sort of the expected cultural thing.
:D my excuse for staying with my parents :D but seriously I do enjoy being around them
My father was a military man. I was fortunate enough to have grown up among Vietnamese refugees. I admired their work ethic. My father had a used car dealership as well ( his side hustle). The Vietnamese families had many family members living under one roof and all contributing to the household. They would come to my Dad's car lot and pay cash for a car. The money was usually rolled up into a newspaper. Fast forward...many are successful business owners. All bought homes with no mortgage. What could be better than a multi generational family contributing to each persons success? I've emulated some of the same wealth building strategies. Frugality...is a mainstay that I passed on to my son who will have his home paid for in about 4 months..he is in his 30's..Love your posts.
Grew up with a hard working single mother and a brother. Started working full time at 19, still haven’t decided what I want to study/do with my life, but I do have a decent job with decent pay.
I moved out at 19 with my girlfriend, we saved up for a down payment for an apartment and moved out pretty quickly.
I am now 24. We recently sold that apartment with a great profit and have now moved in to our ”dream” apartment with 30% of the mortgage cleared. This apartment is in a growing and expanding neighborhood and it will soon rise in value with coming developments. We don’t have any other debts.
We are both pretty good at saving money and paying of our mortgage so we find all your videos very helpful to become even better at it! Thank you BeatTheBush! ❤️
You're welcome! Yeah... paying that home off as first priority vs. investing has always been an point of disagreement. It all depends how much you value stability and guaranteed gains vs. possible gains that is more, sometimes, much more.
Define "decent job". In the 70's uneducated workers would get $30/hr starting out in labor positions.
Owning your own home may be good from a financial/investment perspective, but not everyone is capable of it. Not everyone should own their home because "it's the American dream." My ex-husband, for example could afford to buy a plot of land and put a prefab on it. He was incapable of the improvements (like getting the driveway paved) just to be functional or getting anything fixed. He couldn't keep it clean, he couldn't keep track of the bills. He ended up walking away from it. Big fail.
My brother is capable but it's not his lifestyle to take care of a house. When you buy a house, you need much more than just the mortgage. You must also pay all the utilities, property taxes, appliances and have enough cash in reserve in case anything breaks, floods, or natural disaster.
I used to threaten to live with my parents forever. I only lasted until 3 years out of university. But after their divorce, Mom came to live with me -- now, til one of us dies.
Not to mention some people just do not want to be tied down to a place just yet.
bunny wabbitt I’m just not interested in buying a house. seems like too much work, I rent a cheap apartment instead
good point ...my brother has his own house but he does no maintenance on it , i take work to keep a house up
There are other factors too, the cost of living where I'm at currently is low, and I have a well paying job with my skill set. The same skills where my mother lives at would pay about 40% less. And the job market isn't as good as where I'm at currently.
Hey BTB, what you say is mostly true and I'm currently in that situation where I graduated from college and still living at home. I'm paying some bills for my parents from my job at the same time I'm saving money for a down payment for a future home. The Bay area is too expensive and I'm glad that my parents are supportive. I know some of my friends could afford to live outside of their parent's home but that doesn't stop me from being a future homeowner at a much younger age.
That's the way to do it. Resist renting as much as you can and when you get your first home, people will understand.
This was a good video and I think that you discussed it in a very fair way. Many times people discuss it in a way that disparages Americans for the general practice of expecting their kids to move out at 18. The problem is that most Americans that advocate staying home simply like the idea of not paying rent and are building an argument for childhood 2.0.
The reason that this works for other cultures is because there is indeed an entire culture built around the concept, not just a 24 year old guy living at home while his parents foot the bill. In other cultures he is still expected to contribute to the family in a host of other ways, not just staying home and socking away cash.
Sound financial advice - as well as building better relationships with your family.
I stayed with my parents until I was 26 and my wife at the time was my Gf her being Vietnamese made it easy because she understands, in fact she said it is smart that I saved a lot of money staying with my parents. I was able to pay off all my debts. If I dated a white girl...that probably won't work haha
That kind of understanding might be part of the reason she's your wife? =D
Even as a Girlfriend she was understanding haha She pass that test and graduated to be my wife, yes.
Lucky to those who have parents to live with. My father thinks of his children as his own pension and investment. Leeched out to his kids for money. SMH. I wish I had different parents.
Depends on your background I think. Some depend on their kids some do not.
Thank u for talking about this subject really informative
My parents live with me now
That's the reverse situation and great to support your parents.
Wow, great video. The points you brought up make a lot of sense. There is definitely a stigma associated with living with your parents. Nonetheless, I now realize that it is more practical financially to do so, especially if you live in places where the cost of living can be ridiculously high (i.e. New York City).
Cool! Financially, it can set you back 5-10 years just moving out early on and taking on the added expense.
You're the best. Real world topics!
=D
I moved out when I got a great job in SF Bay Area 4 years into my career. I was living in LA with my parents. It was nearly impossible for me to find a girlfriend when I started trying since high school but I managed to finally find one 10 years later when I was still at my first job and still living with my parents. I was forced to rent for awhile since I moved out for my new job. I had to hunt around to find a place that wasn't more than $2000 a month. I got married (my first and only girlfriend) and started to house hunt. I put in offers and got outbid twice before I finally got a house. I needed my parents to help me financially to put together strong offers just to have a chance.
The idea that someone should move out by 18 seems to be very unreasonable especially with the housing market today. It's better to avoid renting as much as possible and to save the money earn early in career towards investments and homeownership. In my case, my home value appreciated around $500,000 in the 4 years I lived there. If I rented since 18, I would not have been able to afford my current house since I had all those years of rent to pay and can't invest those money spent.
Yes, in some other cultures there are multiple generations under one roof. Living with Mom and Dad *can* mean a "failure to launch", but it's not necessarily the case. Unfortunately, in the USA, there is a stigma attached to living at home. It should be examined on a case-by-case basis and people should be evaluated based on individual circumstances.
If you choose to move out even if it is not in your long-term financial and personal interests, it may be a sign of immaturity rather than the opposite. But that said there are things to watch out for when living at home.. there's a difference between living at home for rational, smart, mature reasons, going out dating, hanging out with friends, working, VS living at home and falling into the trap of having Mom do your laundry, cook your food, and Dad pay your Internet, not socializing, not dating, settling for lesser jobs, which could lead to you getting too comfortable and unmotivated to carve out your own future with your own energy, blood, sweat and tears.
I'm also not saying there are no downsides to living at home.. like lack of privacy sometimes.. but nothing's perfect and you can create the environment you need by making adjustments, I believe.
You have a point. HOW you live at home makes a difference. But you are bound to have food cooked for you and eat as a family mostly.
it would make sense if young adults weren't "pressured or forced" to move out - it creates more demand for real estate and prices keep rising, not to mention there's a shortage of real estate the cities now. I believe it could be better if most homes were occupied by families and couples rather than students in college/young adults. I can't imagine how much kids could save if they chose to stay at home for even 5-10 years when they're working in college vs burning $ from high rent (because nowadays rent just happens to be unaffordable -_-)
Soooo many people just burning money. Young adults are in the lets all burn our money club. It's rampant. San Francisco rent of $2500+/month? Sure thing and they just pay this. Crazy.
T_T i'm one of the unlucky ones stuck with sf rent..
Yeah, life throws so many unexpected things at some of us. I moved out when I was 17 and lived on my own to about 21-22. Then had to move back because of health problems (and costs). Been a few years, spend very very little, save as much as I can. But have to get my own place soon because parents realize they could simply make more $ renting to other people.
My kids are at home and I encourage them to save and get financially secure and stay home as long as they can...I think you are right!! We do get along...so its all good! They pay cheap rent!!
You make your kids pay rent ? thats messed up
My parents would never give me a break they’d install a security camera in my room and around the house and the moment I stepped out of the house to go to the gym or go to a store, they’d tell me to come straight back home. I couldn’t bring my girlfriend near my house because my parents were very conservative and they’d always raid my room everyday and check my phone. I couldn’t spend my own money that I worked for without consulting them and I had to sleep at a set time that they had given me. I was in high school at the time and all of these conditions I had to deal with I felt were extremely limiting to what I could’ve been capable of. I thought since I was still a minor these were just rules I would have to follow but my 19 year old sister was also restricted by these rules. That’s when I knew if I ever wanted to have a sense of true freedom and open the biggest opportunities to make money without fear of limitations, I have to move out as soon as I’m legally allowed to. Moved out as soon as I turned 18 rented a nice apartment not too far from my college, I did a lot of jobs to make money and I was on the constant hustle, and this was only possible because I was no longer under the restrictions of guardians who still treat you like a minor. By the time I turned 20 I had a decent 4 seater car, a beautiful girlfriend whom I can invite into my place without having to worry about getting caught, and the best part was if I wanted to go cruise around at 2 am or wake up in the middle of the night and eat food, I wouldn’t have to worry about my father carrying a sandal or broomstick to beat my ass for waking him up in the middle of the night. While my parents did pay for my tuition and household expenses when I was a minor, I could not reach my full potential due to how limiting they were(I was extremely ambitious but limited). My parents just couldn’t treat me like I was a grown up for once, so that made me decide to move away from them. While living by myself was a bit stressful because it took a bit of getting used to, I consider it to be the best decision of my life. If I hadn’t done that, I wouldn’t be waking up to some mornings on my bed with my girl beside me, I wouldn’t have a sense of privacy- constantly having to worry about a security camera in my room. There’s just so much stuff I wasn’t able to do. If you prepare for it, it’s 100% worth it.
Wow... that is like a prison? I'm glad you moved out because no one can live that way.
Whenever they kick you is the best time. You save so much money and effort
Lol... it's very important early on to save too as the amount you save compounds so much if you know what to do with it.
opposite for me, both my parents moved in 😂, I'd say it's quite fun though, almost a symbiotic relationship, I bring in the dough, my mom does the house chores and cooking 😂 but I guess it's not a problem, since I'm single, but if I were to have a family of my own, might need to make adjustments.
Lol... it's great you see it as fun. It is indeed if you have a good relationship with them and they have interest in your well being while not being too controlling.
Carpe Diem hrrrrmmm, as much as possible no parents or inlaws living with me if I do have a family of my own, they will need to live quite a distance 😀
This video needs more exposure!
Lighting or more people watching? lol
T-rex looks like he has a headache...
i had to move out as soon as i turned 18, it was very difficult. my family is beyond messed-up though. when i have my own kids, they will be able to live with me as long as they want, and I'll never hold it against them. my home will be a loving, supporting place for them until the day i die.
Great, I think the same too. But then how much control will you have over your relationship with your child? Hopefully with proper upbringing everything will be fine.
I’ve always foght a lot with my parents always bouncing back and forth between their houses… I’m 22 and just moved out yesterday and I miss them so much already
Thanks man I’m 23 about to be 24 and going to college while living at home. This really helped me deal with that.
Many people think that buying a house is better than renting because you own the house rather than wasting money paying rent to enrich the landlord. Fact is, buying a house involves getting a mortgage, and getting a mortgage makes you a slave to the banks because you pay interest and fees. Plus by living in your house rather than renting it out, you forego investment income you would have received had you invested that money in, say, stocks or REITs.
It is better to live with your parents and invest in bank stocks so you can profit from home owners who borrow from the banks. This is what I do, and I live off dividends, but it's a lonely life because girls think you're poor, so they avoid you.
That all depends on the final outcome many years later. Property prices could rise or fall but generally it has been increasing. Stocks could rise or fall. From what I have seen though, long term, it is generally a great way to preserve value. You can pick a specific time frame like the mortgage crisis and see that its horrible to buy at the peak of course.
Living at my parents house was heck, especially when my brother was there. I met my now wife, and when she came to the states I got my own place. I was underemployed and had to take out a loan. I have a better job now and slowly but surely paying it off.
Wow... that's pretty daring to take out a loan to move out. Glad you made it work!
BeatTheBush well, it was also to get married. It was mostly because I was sick of living at my folks house. But it's worked well. I like living on my own, my relationship with my parents feels a lot better, and I'm making the right steps now to becoming more financially independent.
It was honestly my plan to stay at home for the duration of my four years at university. Unfortunately, my relationship with my dad is really not great. I don’t have much of a choice but to move out early. I’m 20 years old and I’m honestly not 100% ready, but will I be in less than three years? It’s likely that I won’t be then either. I am making sure to be close enough to home to visit my mom often. I hope that I’ll be financially stable enough once I’ve graduated as I’ll be working as a medical lab technologist. Hoping for good things in the future 🤞
Old video but it really all depends on your situation at home. I live in California which is a very high COL state and even though I work a full time job and have a college degree it's still not affordable to move out into a one or two bedroom place on your own. I work full time and pay at least my share of the household bills. Relationships can get tense sometimes so moving out for the freedom of having your own place is a luxury that I'm saving up for.
I do think people need to "age properly," if that makes sense-and be independent after a certain point but at the same time, it's also unaffordable and I get why people live with a lot of other people in multi generation housing units.
Dave Ramsey would encourage you to move out at 18. But Dave Ramsey is a landlord (think about it). Your advice is spot on.
Does he? I thin it might be based on his background and what his culture is used to.
BeatTheBush I am sure he said he was in real estate and either is or had been a landlord because that was the time I started wondering if he was an old wind bag.
I live with my parents. I pay $250 a month. I saved up $20k. I'm 29. :) i have 0 kids. :) im Asian.
Nice. It's a great way to save quickly.
I’m 21 with 16k saved thinking of moving out
@@ArianaMMR moving out is freedom and learning. But it wont be nice, oh no, trust me. The lack of support and money backlashes on you really hard
I'm 27 years old I'm up to 10,000 in savings right now. Yay
the asian situation and the surinam situation seem to be very similar.
And Singaporean, Saudi Arabian.... as a tally from the comments. =D All except US lol.
its different in holland too.i knew people there who moved out at 15.
Good advice, but it really is hard to put a value on quality of life. How much do you value coming home cracking a beer open without your mom berating you, or maybe walking around with just your underwear? I lived in an apartment in college, I have a job but moved back home. Getting a taste of freedom is just too good. I'll probably be moving out soon within the year. P.S I'm 23.
It's priceless really. Having your own space is a luxury.
I am waiting for your mom to come down the stairs in a bathrobe with hair in curlers yelling at you.
lol. Good one. XD
Staying with my parents through college has saved me sooo much money.
17, girlfriend lives with me trying to stay even though i pay bills. Saving up a ton rn. Parents are cool with it just make sure you clean help with bills cook for yourself etc. Stay chill with your parents my parents lived through the same thing. Dont have kids until 24 - 25 thats what we r gonna do. Have a good day all.
Don't ever take a mortgage. Not in these times.
Indeed, it is a bit heated in price right now. I do think the danger for short term is elevated.
I am 40, my parents live with me now, after had a stroke, but then some people go "wow" you still live with your parents. I go no they live with me. Either way I am kind a stuck. But I don't care what people think, it's their problem not mine.
It's western culture that have this problem. It's sad that this situation is not applauded instead. It's sad.
Hi, I've been waiting for your home tour. Please make one...
I started watching your videos at 2x speed and now i'm saving time out of my life.
A lot of Millennials are swimming in student loan debts. So they have to move in/stay with mom & dad out of necessity. A lot of baby boomers are also helicopter parents. That makes it hard to be motivated to move out or want to move out when (you) still depend on your parents. If you are an adult and still live with your parents, you should contribute something towards the bills. Nothing in life is free. And futhermore, be respectful to your parents. Their house, their rules. No staying out all night, no bringing any loose women in, etc.
I think moving out from your parents house when you save up a lot of money so you can by a car so you can drive and so you can have enough money for a house or apartment
Thanks, beat the bush. Very good advice! In Ireland rents are so expensive it really makes no sense to move out unless you have to
Is it crazy rent prices over in Ireland too? I suppose in the big cities its always like that.
As a first gen Filipino here in the US, I wanted to move out ASAP just like any other kid & my parents just couldn't understand why. Eight people in a 5bd/2ba?! NO Privacy! Reluctantly, I stayed home until I was 25 lol. BUT... I paid off my student loans, bought a used car & saved enough to move out. Oh, how I miss home cooked meals though 😂
The culture in the US rubbed off on you probably. Friends all think the same. When you're doing it, you don't like it. But much later, you realize what an insanely smart choice it is.
Your best video yet. I live with my parents, they are wonderful and caring. Before I watched the video I thought "he's gonna make me feel bad about living with my parents" ... very pleasantly surprised :)
I only try to make people feel bad if they have a lot of credit card debt or if they are buying things they do not need using my 'look of disapproval'. =D
No credit card debt over here ;) if anything I don't spend enough "fun money" on myself...but I'm getting better about it . Can make a video on how to get out there and start dating again? I'm out of practice...Thanks :)
I'm 29 in a few days, and still live with my dad.... Some of it is my own fault, but a lot of it is just trouble with finding a job with a livable wage. My current job based on my last year's hours and pay I could have afforded my own apartment. But the hours aren't stable so I don't know if I will keep those same hours this year, or the next.
CAUTION LONG POST: i'm interested in the responses to this video. i must preface my experience because i'm sure it is not the norm for most of you. my parents separated when i was 3 years old and i did not meet my father again until i was 14 years old. i grew up with my mother and four sisters in the back bay of boston. my father lived only an hours drive away, where he lived with his mistress and he adopted all of her children. my mother passed away when i was 11 years old and then my oldest sister became my guardian until her death when i was 14 years old. at that point i was made an emancipated minor and was able to use and control the two estates and the real estate i now owned. the wills of both my mother and sister were quite specific about which schools and college i should attend, what hobbies (cooking school and ballet) would be paid for and how much money i could withdraw per month to live on. i'm sure the judge who declared me emancipated read into the wills that my father would have no control over any part of their estates. even though i could legally live on my own, this same judge said i should at least live with my father until i reached the age of 18 years. that is how i came to meet my father at age 14. a man i'd never known. i did attend the schools and college of my mother's will and there was enough cash reserve that i had a good amount left when i decided the USAF was where i wanted my future to be. i was the only child (natural or adopted) that joined the US military. because my mother and her family has survived the Great Depression, all of my frugal and saving skills were already entrenched into my brain. that was where i learned to save 50% of my take home pay, to avoid debt and pay cash for everything. so, when it came time to send my children to college and when to stop supporting them, i had only the model of how i was taught to prepare them for their futures. i have a daughter and a son. because i'm a bookish nerd type, my children were also this way. they went to public schools, but i never let that be their only education and i rounded out their educations with home school. my mother, my sisters and i are all members of Mensa, so getting my children tested was normal. they are both members of Mensa, too. they both took their ACT and SAT tests in the 8th grade and passed with flying colors. when my daughter asked at age 16 to begin her college degree i was not surprised and off she went. she dared her younger brother to beat her record and he did. at age 14, he began his college education. the only difference is my daughter went to college out of state while my son lived at home until he was 18 and he began his post grad work. i DID financially support them both until age 26 years of age. with the funds left over from my own college fund to which i kept adding into, i was able to pay cash for all of their education, dorms, books and other fees. i gave each a monthly allowance to spend as they saw fit. when all was said an done, i divided the remaining balance into two equal amounts and with those amounts, my children bought their first home. am i wealthy? no. did i spoil my children? no. i did what was done for me and it has allowed my children a good head start into adult life. they are always welcomed to come home whenever they please and if some tragic event happened, i will care for them as long as is needed. but the flip side of that coin would be they can't come home at 40 years old saying they are broke, homeless and cannot get a job. i want them to leave the nest and go and do all they dream to do.
Sometimes people might become broke/homeless/cannot get a job not of their doing. But with that kind of talent, I don't think you have to worry about that. I think your point is that they are not being lazy and coming home to be lazy. A person who is hard working and at that level of mental capacity should have no problem.
BeatTheBush my son did come home for one year after a massive tornado hit his college town and he had several friends die. he needed a safe place to adjust to the great loss and to become healthy again. even though he came home and took a year off from his studies, he still got a full time job. we both knew he was better when my smothering-mothering method began to bother him. he returned and finished his degree. he is now back to his bubbly self as he was prior to the tornado. because i'd already planned for a worst case situation, when it came, i was prepared. i wouldn't wish a tornado on my worst enemy!
those peas are really starting to grow on me
They are here: amzn.to/1o0O9SX
I am a Asian guy and 20. I still live with my parents under one condition. I have to save 90% of my money from my $16.00/hr lot attendant job and not spend alot. I thank them for that. If not for that I won't be where I am. On and off not usual I get random guilt trips from my dad on random stuff. It makes me want to find a good girl and move out. Which I do want to do not out of hatred for my parents but I envisioned myself to get married and start my own family. I don't hate my parents. I have enough money to buy a used 25k car but I think I will save for a down payment on a place and find a girl and get married. Why I'm not renting somewhere else, rent is sky rocket expensive in my city. I don't want to move to a inconvenient suburb and nowhere else would pay me good. Hopefully in 2 years after I finish my Diploma. I will put the down payment on my place and move out.
A great way to move out is off to a college. Or perhaps start with community college and apply to a bigger nicer far enough away to live on your own/dorms.
I think this has to do with when you can work in a career. So after college or trade school sounds right. Or if you get on the job experience and move up and can support paying rent.
This is not about affording to me. It's about maximizing net worth gains. If you have a job that pays enough, you CAN move out. But do you want to not save as much or even live paycheck to paycheck just so that you can live on your own?
I have to agree with you. I would say its better to have an emergency fund ready plus a good amount of pay above living expenses before moving out. Also good to have two people contributing income, so a room mate or significant other. Two heads are better than one.
IMO, if your parents are not wealthy, you should live at home and help with the mortgage. Once the house is paid off, then move out and get your own place.
That's likely the way to do it as a family. I have seen this myself.
My little brother has a friend that is still living with his parents, he's around 27 and I've heard he's saved up over 150k. I'm going to support my children but set a specific age limit lol, because even though I want them to be successful I still want them to understand the value of hard work and self reliance.
Unless you are a Greek, because going to rent on your own is considered stupid for paying all that rent money. But then your parents decide who you go out with, who you'll marry and what kind of wedding you'll have as well... Independence has a price but it's a state that I prefer 😊
Move out as soon as it makes sense. Your parents want you out. If they say they don't they are either lying or doing you a dis service. Living on your own (reality) happens sooner or later and living with your parents doesn't prepare you for this.
It really depends if you are being babied when you live at home. Do they do all the chores for you or do you just live there as if you were living with roommates.
Chris Ryman Not true at all. Many parents love having their kids at home, and in many other cultures there are cases when kids never move out at all, and even other generations, and extended family live in the same home.
If you want to be independent and move out, fine. Don't expect others to follow the same path you've taken. Especially if others are saving more money, and bettering their lives by living with there parents. As long as you are taking care of the house, and doing chores, and paying your own bills, you have entered reality.
"Youre parents want you out" is only a Western value. All Eastern culture still thinks it is unreasonable for someone to live away from their parents if theyre not married.
Nope, this happens mostly only in the West. In the east, your parents definitely want you to be with them until you get married especially if you're a girl. Even after marriage, some couples live at the husband's parents house. Besides, even after moving out, you're suppose to keep a close contact with your parents and often visit them. Help them financially if they need it. This is proper mannerism towards your parents, but still not sufficient. They brought you up and looked after you when you were younger. They changed your dirty smelly nappies and spent many nights awake when you were sick. They fed and clothed you. They at least deserve this much! Seriously. I'm not saying that you must stay at your parents house, but keep in contact and visit them frequently, regardless. I like many things about the West, but you guys really need to fix up when it comes to family relations. This is essential as it impacts the entire society at large.
Van-Dwelling with a gym membership.
I hear you find out really quickly where the good places to park are.
Kevin Bergey I’ve considered this
Living with your parents and saving for a home is a really great idea. I have never seen it practiced though. The only people I know that lived with their parents in their 20's have not been motivated to push hard in their careers and have not established good financial habits. Any job is 'good enough' when you have no bills.
Probably depends on the crowd you hang out with.
Have you already talked about van life? Seeing as how rent is one of the greatest expenses to the average person, I think living in a purchased van can help a person save a lot.
I have not since I have not lived in a van before. It will sure as heck be interesting. Maybe I should buy one and try it out? LOL!
BeatTheBush You can always share other people's experience with van life or how it would be hypothetically. There was a radical personal finance podcast about that very topic. The podcast was about how to become a millionaire on minimum wage.
Mike Hong Thanks. It's a pretty popular idea nowadays.
gotchafool I'd like to listen to this podcast, where can I find it?
Here's the link: radicalpersonalfinance.com/my-plan-for-how-i-would-become-a-millionaire-with-a-minimum-wage-job-at-walmart-rpf0043/
Going to college to get a MA certificate and probably will roll that onto an associate's degree who knows. I'm 18 going on 19 and I've been dreaming of independence since i got my first job at 16. We are a family of 6 who live in a tiny 3 bedroom trailer, we all share rooms. I've talked to my mom about moving out after my 1st year of college and she always talks about how hard it will be and it could ruin my relationship with the financial strain and all, she wouldn't care if i lived here forever it feels like she just doesn't ever want me to leave. I AM stuck here babysitting my younger sibling which has put more strain on my relationship than anything. My mom works 3 am to 4 pm and has to sleep by 8, and I am stuck here being part time, on many days lately full time mom with occassional pay and no way of transportation.
I normally only see him once a week as I have no car because my mom never has time to take me driving for my license. My dad doesn't either. I hope that soon i can practice driving and obtain a license and have more independence and freedom. My family is just going through a hard time right now and i know my mom needs me but sometimes I wish I had more freedom i feel shackled and having bills and a job sounds so much more fun than being a fulltime house wife with not husband (yet ;)) luckily my boyfriend of 2 years and I lift eachother and support each other i don't know what i would do without him.
It does sound like your family will fall apart without you. They do have driving schools where you hire them to teach you. I mean, if there is no other way, you have to pay for it.
In UK the attitude is very much move out from family as soon as possible, usually going to university and not returning. But I know so many people that are in entry level jobs or graduate level (Which can be quite low still) and they are spending nearly half their salary on rent. I prefer to stay with family because it allows so much more saving.
Great content as usual!
In Germany, the upper middle class parents usually pay their children's rent once they move out until they got a degree and a "real job" I feel very fortunate to do that.
Huh! That's crazy. Pay their children's rent? I suppose anything a parent can do to give their children a leg up on life. All the while not having them depend on it is the important part.
BeatTheBush I am not sure how much the rents are in the US but over here you can rent a very small apartment for like 500$
@Edward Skywalker It depends on the area of course.
I see no reason to leave home. Even a married couple can live in family home. Save. Build additional rooms. Increase property value. Share caring for kids and the home. Many hand make the load lighter. No one cares about your having sex as a married couple. Parents have already done that.
+Apt215 Melissa Brown see my comment for how our family is doing this. It's a great idea, for sure! I think in the U.S. we really need to rethink how we live and why it's often completely unnecessary to have separate homes.
16. I work with people in their late 30's living at home being a burden on their family. Selfish. If I was a parent 18 would be the absolute max. I lived in a squat to all those who say but I can't afford my own 3 bed house. Friends of mine slept on other friends floors. Anything for independence. I really do not understand adults living at home with the parents unless a parent is sick and they move in as a carer.
I'm 36, and i just move back to my parent house after divorcing, forget the western culture, i'm sticking with my Asian culture mama i'm coming home, but not alone sorry i forgot to tell you. i'm bringing my kids too hahaha..
I agree it also varies by culture. I love staying with my mom even though I get some hate on it in the vlogs.
I'd stay with my parents but we argue so much and it's super stressful
That will make staying with parents pretty hard.
Hard to pull this off in america, where half the families are divorced. Family unit don't work as well here, making staying with your parents longer harder. I personally lived with my parents a couple of times after graduation but it worked for me as we had a good family situation.
Oh yes... by the time you are 18 or so... its very possible the parents are divorced, sadly.