Go to saily.com/gradea to download Saily today. *CLICK THE LINK TO SUPPORT ME N GET AN EDITOR OR SMTHIN* My bois helping me pay for my coke and whor- I mean, my bills ;) Much love to them for sponsoring the video.
I'm so glad you are back to making these great videos. You make me laugh every single time I watch or rewatch your content. You are ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS 🤣🤣 PLEASE don't go for milk and get lost like before 😂
Grade is like a time capsule of pre-2016 UA-cam. The extremely dated soundbites, the animation and editing, the poor quality of like 480p, it's all a feast for the senses. I miss this type of UA-cam video. He hasn't changed one bit.
@@Lunar_Capital he has to censor his content otherwise he makes nothing off of it and grade has been off of youtube for a while im sure he doesnt have a shit load of money so hes doing what he can to stay monetized im sure he'll put out a video that includes swearing though
The worst part about boring small talk is that it’s “auto-pilot” for being polite. A man asked me “how are you doing?” and without thinking, I immediately said my usual “ok, how are you?”. We were at that man’s daughter’s funeral, and I will never forget that awkward silence.
Maybe he was just being silent because, y'know, because he needed some time to process his emotions and stuff. I don't know, I feel like that response is actually pretty good. Even after someone dies, they're still human, there's still other things that happened throughout the day. Of course, if you had said something like "I'm doing great! And you?" with a bunch of enthusiasm, that would be very tone deaf. But saying "okay" is actually pretty fitting for that situation.
Can’t blame yourself. Happens to everyone and to you it just happened at the time that felt worst to you. I actually think it’s completely normal to be on autopilot in situations where emotions are difficult.
Nothing wrong with that. If it was actually boring you wouldn't have remembered it. Honestly seems more like a YOU problem if you arent capable of navigating regular conversation and don't think about what you're saying.
The fact that the max res on this video is 480p and the audio sounds like something recorded via some shitty earphones in windows movie maker, makes it even better. Brings back the memories of the old youtube !
I don't know about now but up until very recently in his videos he was editing them with windows movie maker and recording the audio with an old Samsung. "Graphics" are from the classic MS paint.
His productions isn't the reason what made his videos fun, it was his personality and his humor. However i will agree that we need the old UA-cam back.
this so sounds like sth shayne from smosh would say on tntl but with a weird twitchy face, one eye almost closed, the other open far too wide, mouth pinched sideways and a little open "tying your shoes, ehy?"
I can tell you where to go in my part of the world to find loads of people like that. If you were sitting on a bench looking at a news paper, guaranteed someone else would take a seat and say "reading the paper?"
IDK if I never got the memo, but my usual replies are "Fucken tired - overworked to the bone" / "Could be worse" and I never follow up with "What about you" since in 99% of time - I don't care either way :) (and neither did the one that asked). (But that could be a cultural thing, since small talk is generally pretty rare over here)
"How's the weather Tom?" "Karen, i don't give a shit about the weather, why should i care? Don't ask useless questions, Karen." "Tom... you're the weather presenter..."
I once had a drunk stranger tell me he figured out how to read hieroglyphs just from looking at them in a museum. He went on to say how they are about how troublesome wooden plows are and that they preferred it if they were made out of metal. It's just so much more memorable than any of the conversations I usually have. :o
it is. but you know why normally people don't do this? well what if the person you're talking to has no interest in hieroglyphs? what if they are in a hurry? what if(etc) THEORETICALLY smalltalk should serve a s a hook to gauge if someone has a shared interest and then start talking about the interesting thing. but nah people put politeness over anything else so most times unless you tell the other person you'll answer truthfully, small talk will just lead to a polite exchange of nothingess.
A guy I sat next to on a plane told me about how he was a photographer for the police and he was working on a project where they had all these cadavers in a green house taking a time lapse long photo of decay on their faces so that they could teach an AI to reverse render a dead body and generate a face for John Doe corpses. I just listened in amazed silence for most of the flight and occasionally asked questions.
@@CappyK ngl that's quite the wild topic to talk abut with strangers, mainly due to the irl gore aspect of it, but i won't lie, extremely interseting...
One time, my physics teacher asked me, “What’s good?” and I responded “Nothing”. The embarrassment I got was indescribable. I still remember that interaction
After working at the same job for 8 years with the same coworkers I cannot bring myself to talk to them anymore, it's slowly deteriorated into having some sort of non verbal autism with them now.
When I was a cashier at a grocery store, I’d get asked this all the time, especially “how’re you doing?” To which I eventually just started to respond honestly which normally resulted in “eh not great, hoping tomorrow is better”. I then got pulled aside by my manger and was told to stop doing that, essentially
yeah that phrase is more so become a greeting than an actual inquiry on your mental wellbeing. because truth is, most people dont care and just wanna get on with what theyre doing.
I remember when I worked as a hotel receptionist and hated it so much if a customer would ask that I'd tell them how bad it is and ended up crying to them in the end
Yessss I was going to say this. Honestly it's so much better in December when I can ask people their opinion on things like Christmas and it feels relevant enough for it to not be weird to talk about but it's still better than the every day small talk
In Poland talking to a customer first is almost always seen as intrusive and annoying. Especially when the retailers don't let you even look around first.
If you go to a stranger in Germany, and ask them how their day was, you either hear: a) "Ho the fuq are you? Am I supposed to know you???" or b) A forensic analysis of what made their day shit, what kind of shit they have to deal with on other days, how this shit could have been less shitty and how the current Parliament (it doesn't matter who, always their fault) is doing nothing against the shit
Nah, Covid was a helluva conversation starter, at least here in WA, USA. See, this jackass governor of ours, Gov. Inslee, kept the lockdowns and mask mandates going MONTHS after Trump gave the green light to resume as normal. So you'd walk into a place, and you'd see an elderly guy with a mask that reads, "FUCK INSLEE," and I'm like, "Dang, found my new best friend!" Conversations were wild. "So, when do you think we're supposed to exercise our 2nd Amendment rights and do something about this fucker?" was a common conversation starter. Wild times, man. Now it's back to, "Lovely weather we've been having."
As a Dane, we generally don't do much small talk, so when an American asked me "How are you doing?", I thought he generally meant it because he was interested in how I had been. I told him the truth that my Cat passed away recently, to which he ask "why would you say that?", like??? you asked me I ask other danes if they ever had a moment like that with an american, and a few of them did. They thought the americans genuinely asked them about their life. Here in Denmark strangers don't do much small talk / ask about each other unless they mean it.
As an American, I dislike this as well. I'm to the point where when someone asks me how I am, I just say, "Good as I can be, but not as good as I'm supposed to be."
I work at a casino in Vegas as a dealer. I vibe check the players that come to my table and see if they’re worthy of interesting Vegas talk like the history of the mob in the city, the mole people, Area 51, getting married by Elvis, and the clubs. And if they’re really cool, we can talk about Shrek or conspiracy theories. I’m standing at a blackjack table for 8 hours. The least I want is interesting conversation. I’d rather be left alone in my thoughts than have to be in the dull presence of an uninteresting person.
I once had a stranger approach me and ask me what my favourite word is. I couldn't think of anything specific on the spot, and mostly all I could think of were swear words. so I replied to him "I'd probably get in trouble if I said it in public" he laughed at that and moved on.
If you're a foreigner living in a western country you can just pull the "oh sorry, people are just more blunt in my country" card and always get away with virtually anything
ive noticed that almost my entire state has started doing this. you start with a "hows it going?" at a shop or something and the cashier/customer responds perfectly in truth how shit things are. "hows it going?" "its going, drunk assholes and stupid people as usual."
@@juanertizer honestly i've no fucking clue why societal norms shifted to having people make verbal communication completely thoughtless and any form of thought processing occurs into tone reading and body language. sucks ass, just ask the questions you mean.
Tbh I have always answered " how are you doing?" Honestly and that has resulted on me trauma dumping on a lot of casual acquaintances so people don't do small talk with me much.
I drive for Uber, and man, small talk is something you have to get good at if you want tips from many people. I do kinda like it, because it can be an ice-breaker, and on longer rides (I've done multiple rides >250 miles), it's lead to some fantastic conversations. However, part of being a great Uber driver is reading your passenger as they get in. I greet them with a cheery and polite, "Hello! How ya doin'?" It typically gets me the response that tells me if they are a talkative rider, or a rider who would prefer no talk (either works for me). "Alright." Then proceeds to look at phone, means no more talking. "I'm great, how are you?" "I'm well, thanks for asking!" ---> either they continue talking, or they don't, which gives me the social cue I need to proceed in the best course of action that will lead to a tip, and it also usually gets me a tip anyway, because people like friendly people. Best tip I ever got was from a ride I thought wasn't going well. Dude looked grumpy, never responded to my friendly "Hello," and didn't say a word the whole ride. When we got to the destination, he said, "Finally, a driver who drives smooth and keeps his mouth shut." He then handed me a $100 bill. I just gave him a little finger salute, and kept my mouth shut, lol!
Yes exactly. It can be simply used as a tool to get into a more interesting conversation. Obviously you can get stuck in only small tall if you literally have nothing interesting or relevant to say to the other person. But it is a skill.
That's professional attitude right there. And I've indeed seen a few taxi/uber drivers that can just read the person. I'm usually rather untalkative, but especially after a few beers I have the tendency to babble. And I've heard some interesting (to a boring old man like me) stories from the drivers. One of the more recent opened my eyes to how truly bizarre the layout of the apartment complex I'm living is... this taxi driver dude, as a top professional, took a bicycle and scouted the location to be able to access most efficiently.
@@apinakapina This is exactly why I like driving the bar/winery/vineyard hours. People just say what's on their mind, and it's so much more interesting... they're also much looser with their wallet, lol!
2:20 Gonna stop you right there. For like 20 years I've responded to this question with "Terrible, thanks" or "Just the fuckin worst, how about you?" Because it's a great icebreaker to get passed the small talk. It either makes people think I'm weird and they shut up or they laugh and the conversation moves nearly right to the point... I also rarely leave time for them to question why and inject some other thought into the conversation to move it immediately away and closer to ending the conversation.
Same. I work at a grocery store on the side. I deal with a lot of small talk so on occasion I will answer honestly just to see what happens. Either the customer tries not to talk to me anymore or we start having a REAL conversation.
Grade's little character is seriously my spirit animal. I relate so hard to when people ask if I have plans for the weekend and I say no, they act like I was supposed to. Like everyone on the planet seems to have this idea in their head that everyone else is a mega extrovert that uses every weekend they have in their lives to do some giant exciting thing. And so when I say no, I'm put on the spot like I'm the most boring person in existence, and I suddenly feel the need to have to defend myself that having the time to do absolutely nothing is far better for your mental health then stressing yourself out trying to make massive plans. For those people who actually do make huge plans every spare moment they have, I genuinely do not understand you. I've been fighting for the last 5 years of my life since I started working, to have enough free time to myself to not be stressed out of my mind. So why would you volunteer to try to squeeze more $h!t in?
Or even if they CAN talk. NPCs in a video game are more interactive than some of the people ive passed by day to day. Some people will even ignore pardons and just continue on and not even acknowledge it like a psychopath.
@@PlasmaOne Nothing wrong with not wanting to talk or can talk. I would ignore pardons, because most of the people are using fake morals to get into your life and assume your state of mind to have authority over you.
@@PlasmaOneI'm not certain what ignoring pardons means but if you're referring to when someone needs to scoot past in a crowded space I think it's not very strange to not reply to someone's "excuse me" like what am I to do? "Oh my dearest you are so excused" like what? Imma just move and we can go about our days.
This is me. I never say “how are you?” back because I don’t care. I will ask them about something specific pertaining to my life or their life though, so we can have an actual conversation.
@@hereonly2comment Ikr? That's a really strange question to ask. It never gets a detailed answer because not everyone is going on an Indiana-Jones-style fucking adventure each day.
This is the most relatable video ever. It's so awkward when I get asked, "what are you doing this weekend", "have any plans for this summer", "what do you do for fun". And I just have to say NOTHING!
Yep. When people "talk" I just sit there in a corner and watch them like thru a cage in a zoo. And I'm not sure who is on the inside and who isn't. LOL
No you have ASD the term “Aspergers” hasn’t been used in the DSM5 for 11 years I also have ASD ( Autistic Spectrum Disorder ) which is basically high functioning autism
My responses to the basic "How are you" style of question are: "I manage", "Decent" or, if I'm feeling particularly spicy... "Still alive." With all of these, I can convey my true state through tone of voice and expression. Perfect for informing someone whether prying further will open Pandora's box. Cheerful tone of voice and smile for good days, solemn tone of voice and neutral expression to let them know 'if you keep asking I will traumadump on you and you'll have to deal with it'. Works wonders.
GradeAUnderA is back to what made me love his channel in the first place: no politics, no UA-cam drama, just essentially a stand-up comedian doing observational comedy except instead standing up he sitting down and half-yelling at stickmen crudely drawn in Microsoft Paint. Keep it up mate!
It's sort of ironic since Grade did make political videos, and he involved himself in UA-cam drama quite a lot. To the point where he dissed PewDiePie, Markiplier, and Matthew Santoro for calling out how toxic and prevalent UA-cam drama has been. A lot of Grade's videos aren't like that like this one. It reminds me of old UA-cam.
I remember in first grade, every Monday when we got to class we had to write at least 2 sentences about what we did over the weekend. I hated this because I NEVER DID ANYTHING. I was able to get away with just writing “nothing” for about 2 weeks before my teacher said I had to write something other than “nothing”. Super annoying
In Russia "how you been?" is genuine one, and not obliged with the standard 3 word answer (although most times it does). I've heard from some English speaking people how surprised they were when their Russian friends start actually talking about their lifes, how their mother got sick, how their boss is an asshole etc. The weather smalltalk is the same mindnumbing bore tho.
I've found that US Americans in particular use phrases like "what's up?" or "how's it going?" literally just as greeting phrases that don't expect any answer at all, not even a polite "fine thanks, you?" and that REALLY trips me up. I once chatted online with a guy from the US and when he started the conversation with "hey, what's up?" and I actually gave a genuine answer, he just went "haha I love how literal you are"
Not just in Russia. Its mostly a murica thing to take this as an empty phrase. You can ask this in Austria or any of the balkan states and you will get a genuine answer.
As someone who grew up with immigrant parents. It took me a while to realize that those "how are you?" questions are just a greeting and not needed to be taken seriously.
@@DaimonTrilogy hell even in italy... while it's not socially accepted to give an extensive answer, nobody would outright blame oyou for it as long as you had a good reason for it, cause people, at least partially, do mean what they say. there's still that risk assessment of "ok but what if they actually answer honestly" which americans according to the comment section seems to lack(and it scares the fuck out of me as it showcases how absolutely braindead their conversations must bte in contexts where smalltalk might show up) but not with the weather talk, that will always be boring, mainly cause unless you're in imminent danger of cataclysmic events, there's really hardly anything interesting to say about the wheather ever, no matter how sincere you might be.
Worst part is when someone asks how you're doing AS you're passing each other. ...so if it's anything but "good thanks, you?" you'll put them in an awkward position.
I think the thing about small talk is that it’s weird to ask interesting questions is kind of one of the most annoying things that has ever been normalised
As someone who also despises small talk, I can now add “do you think aliens exist” to my list of icebreakers to ask random people, right next to “what’s your favorite Pokémon” and “did you know aye-aye’s are actually goblins going through their simian era”, thank you very much for this!
I used to see it this way, but my view has changed. I also dont want to talk about my big aspirations and point of views to random strangers, just want to get home and unwind half the time. Im glad we have small talk, I see it as a way of saying “I see you and recognize you as a human, maybe we engage in conversation or not, depends on your answer and on my reply” A subset of small talk is just saying Hi, which people dont even bother anymore and it makes me feel invisible. There is a good balance to be had.
This is what I think anytime I see this topic brought up. Yes, sure, it's mundane and kinda sucks, but realistically, most people most of the time would not open themselves up on a variety of topics, depending on how personal, with a stranger they just met in small talk, or anyone else they're not close with. Rightfully so, because you simply don't know them, it's not their business, and/or you just want to be left alone. Silly topics like aliens and such, sure, but I can't see people suddenly wanting to open up personally if there was a newly, magically, established social contract and set of social expectations to make day-to-day conversations more nuanced. It's that way for a reason. People themselves don't want to tell others about their life, or simply don't want to talk.
@@the_blind_hearing6 ive had some of my deepest conversations with complete strangers. I never would have engaged with or met some of these people if not for small talk. don't make sweeping assumptions about "most people". How do you know what "most people" want, if you aren't even engaging with "some people". i see your reasoning on why you wouldn't open up to a stranger in small talk, but humans can experience more feelings than just "the desire to be left alone"
@@chasealcorn1047 I see, your experiences are valid. I didn't mean to suggest that it was impossible to have deep conversations with strangers upon meeting them, but it's just that most of the time that is not the case, at least in what I've experienced and seen throughout my life. Of course you'll develop relationships and dive deeper, or even click with someone right away. But I do wonder how often that is? And yes, I'll admit, you are correct; it was a bit naive of me to make a large sweeping assumption like that, apologies, but I said it based on the fact that this is even a discussion at all. There's a consensus that small talk is boring because a lot of people don't change it up, which in my experience tends to be because they simply don't want to and are just trying to get through the day. Which is fine, it's just weird when some then turn around and complain about it and how it needs to be changed. However, I'll admit that I may simply be projecting my own experiences, and desires, or lack thereof, regarding social interactions and what to get out of them. And perhaps the fear of ostracization or embarrassing yourself in an exchange is really that powerful, so people don't do it. - I'm just saying people have a choice, and it SEEMS a lot of people prefer to keep small talk simple because they want to. And those who really want more out of small talk, will choose to try and get more out of it, and try to be the change they want to see in the world (as corny as that might sound).
@@the_blind_hearing6 there’s a lot of interesting stuff in what you said. I agree that it is weird that some people turn around and complain about the existence of small talk without trying to change it up themselves. I think while scrolling through the comments on this video I was disappointed because so many comments were trying their best to make shitty jokes at the expense of small talk. I liked yours and op’s comments because there was actual critical thinking going on. Small talk sucks, but I do it every single day with family and sometimes even with friends. You just have to suck it up and engage if you want relationships in your life to run smoothly, and if you’re lucky the small talk portion of the conversation only lasts a few sentences. I guess I’m just salty about the number of people in the comments who have clearly never touched grass. Maybe there’s an argument to be made how small talk on the internet doesn’t really exist and is useless since there is always a topic being discussed in any forum thread or video or tweet.
Yes, I agree with this. Small talk is often garbage. However, sometimes you get to a point with big questions where you just don’t know where to begin or how to keep going in the conversation since sometimes it’s just like “I don’t know”. At least with the deep philosophical questions. Sometimes it’s nice to stop and smell the roses. Talk about the small things because it reconnects us to the world around us. Big questions are fun and interesting, but the small questions gives a pause to appreciate little things in life.
@@8Hshan Shared experiences. Things can be boring or awkward standing next to somebody in silence so talking can remedy that. Gives the person something to do. Even if it is technically boring. Relating to one another is just a good way to have a friendly conversation. At least when you don’t really want to be getting into the “oh shit… we’re friends now?” territory. Having a deep conversation just isn’t always necessary.
@@encounteringjack5699 Right, then actually talk about the experience, not spit some meaningless nonsense. Questions don't have to be deep to be interesting (in fact, deep can get boring really quick if someone's not prepared or not in the mood). IDK, maybe it's just because to me "small-talk" is actually an artificial barrier. Just like in the video. If someone expects it from me, I'll likely just leave the conversation.
@@8Hshan Yeah, I tend to avoid small talk, but I don’t think it’s bad because meaningless or pointless. It’s bad because people often expect certain answers to random questions that if answered honestly would just make things awkward or uncomfortable. Like he said, why ask me at all how I’m feeling or how my day is going if it’s not going to be accepted or make a difference whether I said I feel like shit or my day is going rough. Like what do you expect? A lie? And even if we don’t lie, and doesn’t want to share it, the best response would just end up being, “I don’t want to talk about that”. That’s what makes small talk terrible. Trying to “keep it light” can sometimes lead to BS. Like what makes something light? I think our concept of what makes something part of small talk is part of the issue. With that said, I think a good definition for small talk seems to be anything that is not person specific and is of practical focus rather than emotional or philosophical. With that, I think there’s plenty that can be done with small talk. And with that definition, it’s not even about shared experiences. That was mostly a guess from me. With this more rigorous definition, small talk is focusing on the practical information everyone can have access to, at least in general. Why have small talk? The reason might be different depending on the situation. It could be to pass the time or to help bridge the gap between you and someone unknown. Letting trust be built slowly. Hell… with that definition, it doesn’t seem accurate to say that there’s really such a thing as small talk vs big talk. But instead layers or degrees of topics in “largeness”.
2:25 I know of a story like that from my mother, when she overheard such a conversation at a restaurant, where it went something like. A: How you been? B: Actually kinda awful, last few days have been really stressful. A: Ah, great to hear! Why does one even ask at that point? 6:50 I'd still prefer the question about the last weekend over a questions about my plans for the upcoming weekend. Because then saying nothing might set you up for them wanting to invite you to their rave arrest stuff or whatever they do. Me planning to do nothing, doesn't mean that I don't have a plan, my plan is to do nothing.
When were you born dd/mm/yyyy? What is your credit/debit card number? What is the CVC number of the credit/debit card? (3 numbers on the back) This is not random information.
I love how his natural accent is slowly making it's way to the forefront. Grade still puts on a great performance; but, when he gets really annoyed, he goes native.
@@zedpwner Yeah, occasionally. His accent gets all over the place at times. But his actual accent is Indian (or whatever the proper term is). I just like how various accents poke through at random times. Accents make me laugh. I am a silly boy.
I think the reason small talk exists is because most people suck at conversations so they tend to go for the standard small talk options& because they work they never change em.
I feel the same way with questions about career. Yeah, because as a biochemist, youre totally going to understand anything i tell you.... Lets talk anime instead eh?
I remember talking to someone about how I liked to ask new people what kind of music they listen to and they labelled it as “creepy”. Meanwhile I have LITERAL crackheads come up to me when I’m in the middle of the city, and I have a blast talking to them.
because they are not tied down with the "politeness" bullshit, they simply exist mostly miserably when not high, so they will actually talk about what they want to talk about, kinda ironic that people in those circumstances usually have the best conversations.
I agree with you fully, ive had this exact thought about small talk for years now, if it was normalized to ask deep/random questions to random strangers, conversations and my will to socialize would be so much stronger. But unfortunately i guess the reality is that because theres so many of us, everyone has their own unique communication styles and personalities, which aren't always going to align with everyone elses, which is why they give you a strange look. I also think theres like a social conformity aspect to it; if some guy asks a really random question to a bunch of strangers, chances are, even if someone wants to respond to it, they're going to conform to the majority - which is just staring at you silently as if youre some freak, too afraid to join in and be seen a freak aswell.
Working in a call center I don't mind customers occasionally starting small talk because it feels like a reprieve for a brief moment where we can just be real with each other. Like you get people who are garbage all day and one person asks how you are and pauses for an actual answer, not "how you doing, so anyway-" and then responds with "hope it gets better" just. It's nice.
At my work, we have this meeting called "weekly check-in", where coworkers talk about what they did their last weekend. I get why they might do it but I asked to be left out if possible because, you know, I'd rather finish work and be on schedule for my deadlines, and of course management said no. They just outright skip me now because every single time I replied with some variation of "Absolutely nothing, what about you, ?". I don't wanna be rude but if I were actually interested in their personal life I'd ask them about it myself.
Hum, that's very interesting... so... How's your little family, everybody is doing great? Ah shit I forgot, I have to return some videos tapes. Have a good one!
I relate so much to this weird obligation of saying "Yeah it was good" in response to being asked about my day, I remember going back to uni and being asked if my Christmas break was any good and I responded honestly with "Nah, not really." which resulted in an awkward silence. For the record, a relative of mine had passed away and I didn't feel like I could say "Yeah it was great" in good faith, but I also couldn't explain why and drop my personal baggage onto them so they essentially never found out why I was so blunt lol
Did no one ask ? It's kinda weird that not even one person asked either just immediately or just privately "why was it not that good then " or what happened Offcourse you don't have to share it but thats a choice Also really sad to hear condolences hope you're doing better now atleast and have you been able to recover?
@@randomrexy2135Oh don't worry haha it was over a year ago I'm all good, but thank you for asking haha But yeah it was the first class back and they were just like "Oh, well then"
I like the phrase “Living the dream”, because depending on how you say it, it can be positive or negative (in a relatable way). Or you can just lie and say you’re day is going great because you found gold in your backyard or gave birth.
Actually, I am probably one of the only few people that always answers "How've you been?" with the genuine answer. like if I'm having a full on depression I'd just say "dying, thanks! what about you?" or some shit like that
I am not always fully genuine. If I am having a bad day, I will temper it significantly around most people and just say something like "eh, could be better". Most of the time though, my current mood is not all that significant, so I will just say something along the lines of "no complaints"
@@billschlafly4107 What kind of help would you recommend to our poor fellow here? I sure hope you have a genuine, useful answer and aren't just saying what you said to be a prick 🙂
what i find most irritating about the people that ask "what did you get up to on the weekend" is they likely sat around on the couch all weekend doing nothing but expect to be entertained with an adventure time story
2:00 One thing about this, in the former Czechoslovakian & Yugoslav states, it's normal to answer honestly, in fact saying good without any complaints, or when it's obviously a lie is frowned upon. I'm Canadian though, but I still use that rule, I don't care if it makes you uncomfortable, you ask, I answer. I don't lie.
5:27 Social media, PC/video gaming, watching movies/shows, listening to music, and working out, all count as hobbies. The only problem is almost everyone does these things so it doesn't sound interesting to anybody.
Um, finding out common ground is how you engage out of the small talk part: "oh yeah what games are you into?" "See any good concerts recently?" "You excited for *insert show/movie title*?" "Where do you workout?" These are called qualifying follow-ups. Now you know how to continue a conversation.
@@DeAthWaGer That's true. But I'm just saying a lot of people think you have to say something really cool when someone asks, "what are your hobbies?" Like playing a musical instrument or a sport.
@@professional.commentator Your hobby is your hobby. You don't need to impress anyone. If they don't engage with you, it makes the conversation end faster.
What helps me with small talk is to add an opinion to the conversation, try and have follow up questions, and just talk about yourself a little. I find that small talk is supposed to lead into big talk, but effort has to be made to lead into it. Of course the other person jas to engage back, so if they don't talk much then i know that they're not interested in talking, so i move on. For example I try to mention my preference on the type of weather, and why my opinion is the way it is. If someone tells you what they did over the weekend try to comment on it or ask a question. "Yeah i just hung around during the weekend" "oh nice like did you rest a lot or did you do a hobby or watch something? I like it when I have a weekend to slow down." And worse come the worst you can just be a little honest. Anyone can understand a little "things haven't been the best for me" or "school or work has been hard" it's something that the other person can grab into to continue the conversation. Or talk about recent events, even if it's very mundane "I've heen watching a lot of history videos on yt lately, it's really interesting" Sometimes you just have to jump the shark a little bit in a convo to get it to be less awkward.
I often tell strangers how bad my days are going. I'm disabled and rarely leave the house. Pain and suffering are the main events in my life, thanks for asking!
Wow, watching this video reminded me that I *used* to HATE Smalltalk, and now I'm doing it all the time. I think the reason that the interesting questions are going unasked is that the "big" questions either require too much time to ask or get a useful answer out of. If it's someone I'm just meeting for the first time, I need to get to know the person before I can fully understand their answer since I won't have a frame of reference for their subjective interpretations of words. But when it's someone that I *do* know, I open with Smalltalk because the *real* thing I am asking when I ask "how's the weather?" is "would it be rude of me to talk to you about something mentally taxing?" Based on HOW they answer those low-mental-exhaustion questions, I can get a good read on if it's OK to ask more in-depth questions or if I should keep my questions to "small talk" so that I can show that I do care about the other person without wanting to mentally tax them in order to share that sentiment. But I'm only articulating and realizing that I've been doing this because of this video. So TY GradeAUnderA!
The purpose of small talk is to tread lightly, and kind of find your way around someone before letting off actual questions. Playing it safe is just being courteous
Honestly, the only thing that really sucks about smalltalk is when it’s used as the full conversation. In reality, I’m pretty sure smalltalk is meant to be used as an opener or an ice breaker to gauge if it’s appropriate or ok to open up to the juicier questions that grade mentions. I could ask how the weather is, read the response of the other dude, and read the room before using that opening as a way to ask “you think aliens like to hide in the clouds then?” Of course, gradeA here makes these videos for more comedic purposes, but I of course want to mention that small talk does have a purpose, even if it is kinda benign.
that whole mental process sounds extremely convoluted and mentally taxing far more than anything you could actually ask(that doesn't involve making time sensitive plans or paying money), why not just say what you mean?
For real! Once I was talking to someone I knew for a short amount of time and they were like, "why do you ask these questions??", then I asked, "Does it bother you?", and they replied, "Not really... It's that you ask about stuff that I actually have to think about to answer."
@@hueyfreeman818 and why is that a problem? WHY no genuinely why did society just start accepting that? i feel like body language might have some relation to it but being on the ASD and almost never talking to people irl, i really can't fathom the reason. it's like people nowadays hate thinking.
I 100% agree with what Grade is saying and hate small talk as it just makes things more awkward. We should start the new, better way he's suggesting and call it big talk because we'd mostly be talking about bigger, more interesting topics of conversation. So instead of just starting a conversation with "Lovely weather lately, isn't it" or "How you been" we instead start by saying "hi wanna have a big talk" or some other variant of that sentence. I mean even discussing what that actually means to someone would make for a much more interesting and engaging conversation than any kind of small talk.
We used paper maps bought at tourist shacks or tourist hot spots that sell them right there when you arrive off of the plane/ship. Right there in the airport, right there just off the pier. We also just asked for directions if the same language was spoken. If none of this was available or outright avoided, we just got lost. Oh, the fun.
Everytime i say "sh*tty" as always" people start questioning😂 I have depressions as well. The only two beings i like talking to, are my dog and my GF. Or animals in general. Because they don't ask stupid questions
I ligit don't know whats wrong with me when I'm around me crush ,I just use Smalltalk ,why do I fucking do this ,I've no Idea but I fucking do it and I hate doing it ,makes me look like I have nothing to do at *all* ! Normaly 'Doin' anythin' on the weekend 'en ?' I do it EVERY TIME
I have two societal problems with the question "how are you doing"/"how's it going" 1) I actually DO give an answer, whether it's good, neutral or negative, often with an explanation 2) I often forget to ask it back, making me look like an insensitive jerk who doesn't care about others' lives (which oftentimes I don't)
I like doing this too. They asked and they shall recieve. If that doesn't get the conversation going, then at least they'll think twice before shoehorning that question at you again.
Don't worry, people like us may seem like insensitive jerks for not asking it back...but others sometimes seem like even more insensitive jerks for assuming we want to engage in small talk at all.
Honestly, my answer to "How've you been?" Is a blank stare and the question "Do you really wanna know, or is this just small talk?" I get the same looks as "You believe in aliens?"
To be honest I am ok with the hobby one. I just tell them I watch stuff and play games. And honestly with those being how I spend 70% of my free time, that could be a start of a genuinely interesting conversation.
yeah, i guess the weird part about the hobbies question is that far too often things that could count as hobbies are often not considered as such, like would watching movies count as having a hobby for watching movies? most people do watch them but i don't so i would count it, but how many others would? i guess a better question would be "what do you do in your free time?" but that's somewhat lengthy and modern world hates slow things(ironic given how smalltalk outside of body language only extendes discussion for no good reason)
It's true about this when I don't feel comfortable talking about my depressing, procrastinating, & embarrassing life. But for the most part in any case, I don't really mind some of the questions when they have nothing to do with my personal life.
You should come to Finland! We are actually quite bad at small talk, and often start discussing small talk questions as if they were genuinely brought up as conversation topics :D
In germany, some people start smalltalk by saying "na?" And that would translate to "eh?" Like, what am I supposed to answer? Them: Hey Me: Hallo Them: Na? Yeah well see you in hell
That's hilarious, in my country saying, 'na' would mean no. So going up to someone and saying that would confuse them while also giving you a funny look 😂
Go to saily.com/gradea to download Saily today.
*CLICK THE LINK TO SUPPORT ME N GET AN EDITOR OR SMTHIN*
My bois helping me pay for my coke and whor- I mean, my bills ;)
Much love to them for sponsoring the video.
I'm so glad you are back to making these great videos. You make me laugh every single time I watch or rewatch your content. You are ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS 🤣🤣 PLEASE don't go for milk and get lost like before 😂
Grade, you're so cool please have my babies
Top 5!
How’s the weather grade
You sound like a rando’s impression of classic Grade. (Maybe because he got older tho)
In Serbia when someone asks you "How have you been" one of the answers you can give is "Let's not make it worse"
Neighbour here, wish i heard of this sooner lol
I'll have to ask my Serbian friend about this, maybe they can give me some more great responses!
I'm Serbian (living in Bosnia), I'm not sure if anyone's said that before. But i've heard people go like "I'm surviving" (Preživljavam/borim se) lmao
Serbia moment
My grandma says that to her transphobic sister and its hilarious cause they're like 85
Nice weather we’re having Grade.
I don't know a single person that is so bored they have to resort to talking about the weather.
@@WiseArkAngel well 'ere in bri'ian, we have a thing called, rain. when its sunny, we 'alk abou' how theres no rain
@@WiseArkAngel The grass is green
The sky is blue
The flower are blooming
And grade a under A's video upcoming video is premiering
It's snowing here🥰
@@Artistboi485yessir, winter 4.0 just dropped
I once asked an acquaintance “do you hate small talk” and it lead to an hour long conversation that other people joined.
Huh
@@parentfake306what are you confused about?
@@keyboard2758 no I wasn't confused I was just like huh as in mhm as in okay buddy that's sort of cool I guess.
@@parentfake306 I see
I like that, time to start using it, at which point everyone will start using it and the standard response will be "no fuck off"
Grade is like a time capsule of pre-2016 UA-cam. The extremely dated soundbites, the animation and editing, the poor quality of like 480p, it's all a feast for the senses. I miss this type of UA-cam video. He hasn't changed one bit.
Other than him having cencore swearing now
Thatd actuallly not a bad thing@@sallytheuselessbird
Pretty sure he upgraded his mic unfortunately. Not enough yelling
@@Subremedy
It’s bad enough where he made a video about censorship and how it’s garbage.
@@Lunar_Capital he has to censor his content otherwise he makes nothing off of it and grade has been off of youtube for a while im sure he doesnt have a shit load of money so hes doing what he can to stay monetized im sure he'll put out a video that includes swearing though
Here in the Czech Republic, when someone asks „How are you?" You are ethnically obligated to start complaining about everything immediately.
How are you? - Don‘t even get me started!
I like the Czech Republic.
I wanted to say this. I don't think here you have to say it's all good. You just start complaining about the most minuscule thing.
ethnically
As czech i can confirm
My favorite one to end an awkward silence or start a conversation is "you think OJ did it?"
Soo, now that the juice has been squeezed, he do it right?
If the glove fits...
@@DostoyevskyTolstoyyou must acquit!
this is brilliant
I like to mess with people by saying "How tf does florida have an Ice Hockey team?"
THE OLD INTRO IS BACK TO STAY!
Gd player spotted
Maybe ... Depends on what Susan does
@@dougtheghoul2845 You know she retired, right?
@@moltengears7483 gowmrtryey dahs
@@dougtheghoul2845lmao get used to the times
The worst part about boring small talk is that it’s “auto-pilot” for being polite. A man asked me “how are you doing?” and without thinking, I immediately said my usual “ok, how are you?”. We were at that man’s daughter’s funeral, and I will never forget that awkward silence.
Maybe he was just being silent because, y'know, because he needed some time to process his emotions and stuff. I don't know, I feel like that response is actually pretty good. Even after someone dies, they're still human, there's still other things that happened throughout the day. Of course, if you had said something like "I'm doing great! And you?" with a bunch of enthusiasm, that would be very tone deaf. But saying "okay" is actually pretty fitting for that situation.
Can’t blame yourself. Happens to everyone and to you it just happened at the time that felt worst to you.
I actually think it’s completely normal to be on autopilot in situations where emotions are difficult.
Nothing wrong with that. If it was actually boring you wouldn't have remembered it. Honestly seems more like a YOU problem if you arent capable of navigating regular conversation and don't think about what you're saying.
🤣🤣🤣
I’m pretty sure he was processing his emotion. You might had misunderstood his silence as awkwardness
The fact that the max res on this video is 480p and the audio sounds like something recorded via some shitty earphones in windows movie maker, makes it even better. Brings back the memories of the old youtube !
I don't know about now but up until very recently in his videos he was editing them with windows movie maker and recording the audio with an old Samsung. "Graphics" are from the classic MS paint.
Until 4:32
His productions isn't the reason what made his videos fun, it was his personality and his humor.
However i will agree that we need the old UA-cam back.
Ive heard a story where this guys stopped to tie his shoes,
and then a random guy walking by stopped, looked at him and said:
Tying your shoes, huh?
Bruh 😂😂
this so sounds like sth shayne from smosh would say on tntl but with a weird twitchy face, one eye almost closed, the other open far too wide, mouth pinched sideways and a little open
"tying your shoes, ehy?"
I love that one actually lol. Let your convo be interesting or so stupid that it's funny.
Lovely weather, isn't it? 😜
I can tell you where to go in my part of the world to find loads of people like that. If you were sitting on a bench looking at a news paper, guaranteed someone else would take a seat and say "reading the paper?"
If someone responds to "how ya doin" with just "ok" that person is in the deepest darkest hell imaginable
i usually respond with fine
Hmm, I almost always respond with ok
=/
I just respond "as usual"
Where would you say they are if the response was, " GO F#@% YA-SELF" or as was the case, went into shutdown attempting to suppress that response?
IDK if I never got the memo, but my usual replies are "Fucken tired - overworked to the bone" / "Could be worse"
and I never follow up with "What about you" since in 99% of time - I don't care either way :) (and neither did the one that asked).
(But that could be a cultural thing, since small talk is generally pretty rare over here)
"How's the weather Tom?"
"Karen, i don't give a shit about the weather, why should i care? Don't ask useless questions, Karen."
"Tom... you're the weather presenter..."
I once had a drunk stranger tell me he figured out how to read hieroglyphs just from looking at them in a museum. He went on to say how they are about how troublesome wooden plows are and that they preferred it if they were made out of metal.
It's just so much more memorable than any of the conversations I usually have. :o
it is.
but you know why normally people don't do this?
well what if the person you're talking to has no interest in hieroglyphs? what if they are in a hurry? what if(etc)
THEORETICALLY smalltalk should serve a s a hook to gauge if someone has a shared interest and then start talking about the interesting thing.
but nah people put politeness over anything else so most times unless you tell the other person you'll answer truthfully, small talk will just lead to a polite exchange of nothingess.
A guy I sat next to on a plane told me about how he was a photographer for the police and he was working on a project where they had all these cadavers in a green house taking a time lapse long photo of decay on their faces so that they could teach an AI to reverse render a dead body and generate a face for John Doe corpses. I just listened in amazed silence for most of the flight and occasionally asked questions.
@@CappyK ngl that's quite the wild topic to talk abut with strangers, mainly due to the irl gore aspect of it, but i won't lie, extremely interseting...
@@CappyKthe stranger on the plane is always an unpredictable event 😂
One time, my physics teacher asked me, “What’s good?” and I responded “Nothing”.
The embarrassment I got was indescribable. I still remember that interaction
i mean at least you were being honest
I wouldn't be embarrassed. You told the truth.
How old was this teacher 25? 😂
Cant be worse than "Hey how is it going?" and saying "You too!".
coulda been worse tbh
way worse
classic story from my school: boy calls teacher mom by accident
After working at the same job for 8 years with the same coworkers I cannot bring myself to talk to them anymore, it's slowly deteriorated into having some sort of non verbal autism with them now.
When I was a cashier at a grocery store, I’d get asked this all the time, especially “how’re you doing?” To which I eventually just started to respond honestly which normally resulted in “eh not great, hoping tomorrow is better”. I then got pulled aside by my manger and was told to stop doing that, essentially
yeah that phrase is more so become a greeting than an actual inquiry on your mental wellbeing. because truth is, most people dont care and just wanna get on with what theyre doing.
I remember when I worked as a hotel receptionist and hated it so much if a customer would ask that I'd tell them how bad it is and ended up crying to them in the end
@@cosmic5934 Because it's a greeting now, I literally never answer the question. I just repeat it back like we both said hi to each other lol.
At my work I tell them how I feel but to a degree and all, like I’ll ramble a bit, joke, and maybe even talk about some stuff
smalltalk with cashiers is the weirdest thing ever, like yea we both know that we genuinely do not care
im so glad we dont do that where i live
As someone who works in retail, this is exactly how I feel with 95% of customer interactions
Yessss I was going to say this. Honestly it's so much better in December when I can ask people their opinion on things like Christmas and it feels relevant enough for it to not be weird to talk about but it's still better than the every day small talk
I find it crazy that you work in retail and are daring enough to ask the general public anything besides "lovely weather we're having?"
In Poland talking to a customer first is almost always seen as intrusive and annoying. Especially when the retailers don't let you even look around first.
Basically how I feel interacting with customers or coworkers.
If you go to a stranger in Germany, and ask them how their day was, you either hear:
a) "Ho the fuq are you? Am I supposed to know you???"
or
b) A forensic analysis of what made their day shit, what kind of shit they have to deal with on other days, how this shit could have been less shitty and how the current Parliament (it doesn't matter who, always their fault) is doing nothing against the shit
germany sounds like INTJ
Und ich bin definitiv A.
B ist zu viel laberei. Außerdem kenn ich die Person nicht? Wen interessierts’?
@@SorrowAvenuehow are you bro? How's your day going?
Dam, that shit must be pissing everyone off *i know that pun was shit*
What's worse is that post-covid made this so more common, everyone forgot what it was like to have an actual conversation.
i think by now we’re starting to get the hang of it
YES! It’s so bad. Actually depressing.
you can use small talk to get into a conversation lmao
Fuck the lockdowns and fuck the governments who took part in them.
Nah, Covid was a helluva conversation starter, at least here in WA, USA.
See, this jackass governor of ours, Gov. Inslee, kept the lockdowns and mask mandates going MONTHS after Trump gave the green light to resume as normal.
So you'd walk into a place, and you'd see an elderly guy with a mask that reads, "FUCK INSLEE," and I'm like, "Dang, found my new best friend!" Conversations were wild. "So, when do you think we're supposed to exercise our 2nd Amendment rights and do something about this fucker?" was a common conversation starter. Wild times, man.
Now it's back to, "Lovely weather we've been having."
As a Dane, we generally don't do much small talk, so when an American asked me "How are you doing?", I thought he generally meant it because he was interested in how I had been.
I told him the truth that my Cat passed away recently, to which he ask "why would you say that?", like??? you asked me
I ask other danes if they ever had a moment like that with an american, and a few of them did. They thought the americans genuinely asked them about their life.
Here in Denmark strangers don't do much small talk / ask about each other unless they mean it.
Same in Norway, except here when people do talk, they don't have a potato in their mouth.
As an American, I dislike this as well. I'm to the point where when someone asks me how I am, I just say, "Good as I can be, but not as good as I'm supposed to be."
@@thatoneguy1070fr
I have no idea why, but “Dane” autocorrected to “Great Dane” in my brain. I did it twice somehow
Can relate as a Swede
I work at a casino in Vegas as a dealer. I vibe check the players that come to my table and see if they’re worthy of interesting Vegas talk like the history of the mob in the city, the mole people, Area 51, getting married by Elvis, and the clubs. And if they’re really cool, we can talk about Shrek or conspiracy theories.
I’m standing at a blackjack table for 8 hours. The least I want is interesting conversation. I’d rather be left alone in my thoughts than have to be in the dull presence of an uninteresting person.
weren't mole people a new york thing?
That sounds like a pretty interesting job. You must meet all kinds of people lol
Damn I'd unironically go to casino if there're dealers to talk about shrek
tell me about the society in them underground pipes of your city, mate
@@windws7137 hell yeah brother ain’t nothing like gambling in Vegas and having a good talk about shrek.
I once had a stranger approach me and ask me what my favourite word is. I couldn't think of anything specific on the spot, and mostly all I could think of were swear words. so I replied to him "I'd probably get in trouble if I said it in public" he laughed at that and moved on.
My sister was asked this question. She said that without thinking she replied 'fuck' 😂 that's her favorite word xD
I can never remember my favourite word because it's so long but it's "hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia"
@@payhemseht respect, mine was pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis
@@profcalculus474 dammit you took mine
My answer would've been BINGUS
At this point, i give the most literal/direct/truthful answer every if a stranger asks me a generic question. As an introvert, this works wonders.
If you're a foreigner living in a western country you can just pull the "oh sorry, people are just more blunt in my country" card and always get away with virtually anything
I feel you. I never exaggerate and say I'm great.
@@XD-bx6ee you can also just say "you asked". works every time for me
ive noticed that almost my entire state has started doing this. you start with a "hows it going?" at a shop or something and the cashier/customer responds perfectly in truth how shit things are.
"hows it going?"
"its going, drunk assholes and stupid people as usual."
@@juanertizer honestly i've no fucking clue why societal norms shifted to having people make verbal communication completely thoughtless and any form of thought processing occurs into tone reading and body language.
sucks ass, just ask the questions you mean.
Tbh I have always answered " how are you doing?" Honestly and that has resulted on me trauma dumping on a lot of casual acquaintances so people don't do small talk with me much.
Yeah that's worse than regular small talk, you should respond by asking them if they've seen coneheads or some cool shit
I drive for Uber, and man, small talk is something you have to get good at if you want tips from many people.
I do kinda like it, because it can be an ice-breaker, and on longer rides (I've done multiple rides >250 miles), it's lead to some fantastic conversations.
However, part of being a great Uber driver is reading your passenger as they get in.
I greet them with a cheery and polite, "Hello! How ya doin'?"
It typically gets me the response that tells me if they are a talkative rider, or a rider who would prefer no talk (either works for me).
"Alright." Then proceeds to look at phone, means no more talking.
"I'm great, how are you?" "I'm well, thanks for asking!" ---> either they continue talking, or they don't, which gives me the social cue I need to proceed in the best course of action that will lead to a tip, and it also usually gets me a tip anyway, because people like friendly people.
Best tip I ever got was from a ride I thought wasn't going well. Dude looked grumpy, never responded to my friendly "Hello," and didn't say a word the whole ride. When we got to the destination, he said, "Finally, a driver who drives smooth and keeps his mouth shut." He then handed me a $100 bill. I just gave him a little finger salute, and kept my mouth shut, lol!
Dang, a 100$ tip
Yes exactly. It can be simply used as a tool to get into a more interesting conversation. Obviously you can get stuck in only small tall if you literally have nothing interesting or relevant to say to the other person. But it is a skill.
That's professional attitude right there. And I've indeed seen a few taxi/uber drivers that can just read the person.
I'm usually rather untalkative, but especially after a few beers I have the tendency to babble. And I've heard some interesting (to a boring old man like me) stories from the drivers. One of the more recent opened my eyes to how truly bizarre the layout of the apartment complex I'm living is... this taxi driver dude, as a top professional, took a bicycle and scouted the location to be able to access most efficiently.
@@apinakapina This is exactly why I like driving the bar/winery/vineyard hours. People just say what's on their mind, and it's so much more interesting... they're also much looser with their wallet, lol!
If that last story is true I think that man might be my spirit animal
2:20 Gonna stop you right there. For like 20 years I've responded to this question with "Terrible, thanks" or "Just the fuckin worst, how about you?" Because it's a great icebreaker to get passed the small talk. It either makes people think I'm weird and they shut up or they laugh and the conversation moves nearly right to the point... I also rarely leave time for them to question why and inject some other thought into the conversation to move it immediately away and closer to ending the conversation.
Genuine talk like that is awesome!
same
I'm Polish so I'm honest with my answers. Either I'm tired or I complain.
Great strategy,
Same. I work at a grocery store on the side. I deal with a lot of small talk so on occasion I will answer honestly just to see what happens. Either the customer tries not to talk to me anymore or we start having a REAL conversation.
Grade's little character is seriously my spirit animal. I relate so hard to when people ask if I have plans for the weekend and I say no, they act like I was supposed to. Like everyone on the planet seems to have this idea in their head that everyone else is a mega extrovert that uses every weekend they have in their lives to do some giant exciting thing. And so when I say no, I'm put on the spot like I'm the most boring person in existence, and I suddenly feel the need to have to defend myself that having the time to do absolutely nothing is far better for your mental health then stressing yourself out trying to make massive plans.
For those people who actually do make huge plans every spare moment they have, I genuinely do not understand you. I've been fighting for the last 5 years of my life since I started working, to have enough free time to myself to not be stressed out of my mind. So why would you volunteer to try to squeeze more $h!t in?
Small talk is just a short interim period where you determine if someone's too crazy to talk to or not
Or even if they CAN talk. NPCs in a video game are more interactive than some of the people ive passed by day to day. Some people will even ignore pardons and just continue on and not even acknowledge it like a psychopath.
Exactly that.
Smalltalk is just a way to measure the vibes of the person you're smalltalking to. If they pass, then make the conversation interesting.
How about if somebody is getting baited to be emotionally manipulated to?
@@PlasmaOne Nothing wrong with not wanting to talk or can talk. I would ignore pardons, because most of the people are using fake morals to get into your life and assume your state of mind to have authority over you.
@@PlasmaOneI'm not certain what ignoring pardons means but if you're referring to when someone needs to scoot past in a crowded space I think it's not very strange to not reply to someone's "excuse me" like what am I to do? "Oh my dearest you are so excused" like what? Imma just move and we can go about our days.
Guy: "How are you doing?"
Other guy: "Good."
Guy: "Good!"
The most spoken "conversation" ever.
Han: How we doing?
Luke: Same as always.
Han: That bad huh.
This is me. I never say “how are you?” back because I don’t care. I will ask them about something specific pertaining to my life or their life though, so we can have an actual conversation.
@@hereonly2comment Ikr? That's a really strange question to ask. It never gets a detailed answer because not everyone is going on an Indiana-Jones-style fucking adventure each day.
This is the most relatable video ever. It's so awkward when I get asked, "what are you doing this weekend", "have any plans for this summer", "what do you do for fun". And I just have to say NOTHING!
As someone with Aspergers, i can relate to this on a spiritual level
Same, it’s no fun when you’re stuck in the middle
fr
Yep. When people "talk" I just sit there in a corner and watch them like thru a cage in a zoo. And I'm not sure who is on the inside and who isn't. LOL
The Autism Spectrum can easily be described as how much effort you put into a conversation.
No you have ASD the term “Aspergers” hasn’t been used in the DSM5 for 11 years I also have ASD ( Autistic Spectrum Disorder ) which is basically high functioning autism
My responses to the basic "How are you" style of question are: "I manage", "Decent" or, if I'm feeling particularly spicy... "Still alive."
With all of these, I can convey my true state through tone of voice and expression. Perfect for informing someone whether prying further will open Pandora's box. Cheerful tone of voice and smile for good days, solemn tone of voice and neutral expression to let them know 'if you keep asking I will traumadump on you and you'll have to deal with it'.
Works wonders.
the fact normal people can control body language and tone like that and also translate it still scares me to this day...
My favourite response to "How are you"?
"Well I managed to wake up and get out of bed, that's a good start I guess".
6:36 "I DON'T DO ANYTHING. EVER" Same bro, same.
Im so glad you're making vids again, the last 3 were absolute bangers mate, feels like 2010s again
Couldn't have said it any better
GradeAUnderA is back to what made me love his channel in the first place: no politics, no UA-cam drama, just essentially a stand-up comedian doing observational comedy except instead standing up he sitting down and half-yelling at stickmen crudely drawn in Microsoft Paint. Keep it up mate!
I genuinely can't tell if this is a joke lol.
@@drooley no I mean it
@@drooley What about it seems like a joke to you?
It's sort of ironic since Grade did make political videos, and he involved himself in UA-cam drama quite a lot. To the point where he dissed PewDiePie, Markiplier, and Matthew Santoro for calling out how toxic and prevalent UA-cam drama has been. A lot of Grade's videos aren't like that like this one. It reminds me of old UA-cam.
@@hmlandis1370 A lot of Grade's videos involve politics and UA-cam drama.
I remember in first grade, every Monday when we got to class we had to write at least 2 sentences about what we did over the weekend. I hated this because I NEVER DID ANYTHING. I was able to get away with just writing “nothing” for about 2 weeks before my teacher said I had to write something other than “nothing”. Super annoying
Every conversation on Discord:
Hey
Hey
How are you?
Good, how are you?
Good
That's good
💯
Painfully accurate
Seems like Discord is the new bus stop :D
You're using it wrong. You should talk about Hyperborea and shit
Isn't it a spectral thing?
In Russia "how you been?" is genuine one, and not obliged with the standard 3 word answer (although most times it does). I've heard from some English speaking people how surprised they were when their Russian friends start actually talking about their lifes, how their mother got sick, how their boss is an asshole etc.
The weather smalltalk is the same mindnumbing bore tho.
I've found that US Americans in particular use phrases like "what's up?" or "how's it going?" literally just as greeting phrases that don't expect any answer at all, not even a polite "fine thanks, you?" and that REALLY trips me up. I once chatted online with a guy from the US and when he started the conversation with "hey, what's up?" and I actually gave a genuine answer, he just went "haha I love how literal you are"
Not just in Russia.
Its mostly a murica thing to take this as an empty phrase.
You can ask this in Austria or any of the balkan states and you will get a genuine answer.
Yeah, in Poland you will get "ok/fine" or just a summary of how shitty it is
As someone who grew up with immigrant parents. It took me a while to realize that those "how are you?" questions are just a greeting and not needed to be taken seriously.
@@DaimonTrilogy hell even in italy... while it's not socially accepted to give an extensive answer, nobody would outright blame oyou for it as long as you had a good reason for it, cause people, at least partially, do mean what they say.
there's still that risk assessment of "ok but what if they actually answer honestly" which americans according to the comment section seems to lack(and it scares the fuck out of me as it showcases how absolutely braindead their conversations must bte in contexts where smalltalk might show up)
but not with the weather talk, that will always be boring, mainly cause unless you're in imminent danger of cataclysmic events, there's really hardly anything interesting to say about the wheather ever, no matter how sincere you might be.
Worst part is when someone asks how you're doing AS you're passing each other.
...so if it's anything but "good thanks, you?" you'll put them in an awkward position.
I think the thing about small talk is that it’s weird to ask interesting questions is kind of one of the most annoying things that has ever been normalised
Well its great because it weeds out the npc people
Yeah, I get that. Anyways, did you see that pilot episode for Ramshackle that came out a couple weeks ago?
That's why I hate all talks in general, small or big talks. I actually prefer small talks, because it's easier to separate from that person.
@@kenswordswhat’s ramshackle?
@@Gelusss It's an indie series on UA-cam
For me, it's either silence or "What's your favourite platonic solid? I'm quite fond of the icosahedron"
What would a magic 8-ball or game of Dungeons and Dragons be without it?
As someone who also despises small talk, I can now add “do you think aliens exist” to my list of icebreakers to ask random people, right next to “what’s your favorite Pokémon” and “did you know aye-aye’s are actually goblins going through their simian era”, thank you very much for this!
I used to see it this way, but my view has changed. I also dont want to talk about my big aspirations and point of views to random strangers, just want to get home and unwind half the time.
Im glad we have small talk, I see it as a way of saying “I see you and recognize you as a human, maybe we engage in conversation or not, depends on your answer and on my reply”
A subset of small talk is just saying Hi, which people dont even bother anymore and it makes me feel invisible.
There is a good balance to be had.
This is what I think anytime I see this topic brought up. Yes, sure, it's mundane and kinda sucks, but realistically, most people most of the time would not open themselves up on a variety of topics, depending on how personal, with a stranger they just met in small talk, or anyone else they're not close with. Rightfully so, because you simply don't know them, it's not their business, and/or you just want to be left alone.
Silly topics like aliens and such, sure, but I can't see people suddenly wanting to open up personally if there was a newly, magically, established social contract and set of social expectations to make day-to-day conversations more nuanced. It's that way for a reason. People themselves don't want to tell others about their life, or simply don't want to talk.
@@the_blind_hearing6 ive had some of my deepest conversations with complete strangers. I never would have engaged with or met some of these people if not for small talk.
don't make sweeping assumptions about "most people". How do you know what "most people" want, if you aren't even engaging with "some people".
i see your reasoning on why you wouldn't open up to a stranger in small talk, but humans can experience more feelings than just "the desire to be left alone"
@@chasealcorn1047 I see, your experiences are valid. I didn't mean to suggest that it was impossible to have deep conversations with strangers upon meeting them, but it's just that most of the time that is not the case, at least in what I've experienced and seen throughout my life. Of course you'll develop relationships and dive deeper, or even click with someone right away. But I do wonder how often that is?
And yes, I'll admit, you are correct; it was a bit naive of me to make a large sweeping assumption like that, apologies, but I said it based on the fact that this is even a discussion at all. There's a consensus that small talk is boring because a lot of people don't change it up, which in my experience tends to be because they simply don't want to and are just trying to get through the day. Which is fine, it's just weird when some then turn around and complain about it and how it needs to be changed.
However, I'll admit that I may simply be projecting my own experiences, and desires, or lack thereof, regarding social interactions and what to get out of them. And perhaps the fear of ostracization or embarrassing yourself in an exchange is really that powerful, so people don't do it. - I'm just saying people have a choice, and it SEEMS a lot of people prefer to keep small talk simple because they want to. And those who really want more out of small talk, will choose to try and get more out of it, and try to be the change they want to see in the world (as corny as that might sound).
@@the_blind_hearing6 there’s a lot of interesting stuff in what you said. I agree that it is weird that some people turn around and complain about the existence of small talk without trying to change it up themselves.
I think while scrolling through the comments on this video I was disappointed because so many comments were trying their best to make shitty jokes at the expense of small talk. I liked yours and op’s comments because there was actual critical thinking going on.
Small talk sucks, but I do it every single day with family and sometimes even with friends. You just have to suck it up and engage if you want relationships in your life to run smoothly, and if you’re lucky the small talk portion of the conversation only lasts a few sentences.
I guess I’m just salty about the number of people in the comments who have clearly never touched grass.
Maybe there’s an argument to be made how small talk on the internet doesn’t really exist and is useless since there is always a topic being discussed in any forum thread or video or tweet.
When someone asks how I’ve been, I always just say “I’m here”. Noncommittal enough to not be awkward but open ended enough to discuss if they want.
Yes, I agree with this. Small talk is often garbage. However, sometimes you get to a point with big questions where you just don’t know where to begin or how to keep going in the conversation since sometimes it’s just like “I don’t know”. At least with the deep philosophical questions.
Sometimes it’s nice to stop and smell the roses. Talk about the small things because it reconnects us to the world around us. Big questions are fun and interesting, but the small questions gives a pause to appreciate little things in life.
But why not appreciate them in silence? Where's the need for mindless babbling in that?
@@8Hshan Shared experiences.
Things can be boring or awkward standing next to somebody in silence so talking can remedy that. Gives the person something to do. Even if it is technically boring.
Relating to one another is just a good way to have a friendly conversation. At least when you don’t really want to be getting into the “oh shit… we’re friends now?” territory.
Having a deep conversation just isn’t always necessary.
@@encounteringjack5699 Right, then actually talk about the experience, not spit some meaningless nonsense. Questions don't have to be deep to be interesting (in fact, deep can get boring really quick if someone's not prepared or not in the mood).
IDK, maybe it's just because to me "small-talk" is actually an artificial barrier. Just like in the video. If someone expects it from me, I'll likely just leave the conversation.
@@8Hshan Yeah, I tend to avoid small talk, but I don’t think it’s bad because meaningless or pointless. It’s bad because people often expect certain answers to random questions that if answered honestly would just make things awkward or uncomfortable.
Like he said, why ask me at all how I’m feeling or how my day is going if it’s not going to be accepted or make a difference whether I said I feel like shit or my day is going rough.
Like what do you expect? A lie? And even if we don’t lie, and doesn’t want to share it, the best response would just end up being, “I don’t want to talk about that”.
That’s what makes small talk terrible. Trying to “keep it light” can sometimes lead to BS. Like what makes something light?
I think our concept of what makes something part of small talk is part of the issue. With that said, I think a good definition for small talk seems to be anything that is not person specific and is of practical focus rather than emotional or philosophical.
With that, I think there’s plenty that can be done with small talk. And with that definition, it’s not even about shared experiences. That was mostly a guess from me. With this more rigorous definition, small talk is focusing on the practical information everyone can have access to, at least in general.
Why have small talk? The reason might be different depending on the situation. It could be to pass the time or to help bridge the gap between you and someone unknown. Letting trust be built slowly.
Hell… with that definition, it doesn’t seem accurate to say that there’s really such a thing as small talk vs big talk. But instead layers or degrees of topics in “largeness”.
Found the alien who likes small talk😂
2:25 I know of a story like that from my mother, when she overheard such a conversation at a restaurant, where it went something like.
A: How you been?
B: Actually kinda awful, last few days have been really stressful.
A: Ah, great to hear!
Why does one even ask at that point?
6:50 I'd still prefer the question about the last weekend over a questions about my plans for the upcoming weekend.
Because then saying nothing might set you up for them wanting to invite you to their rave arrest stuff or whatever they do.
Me planning to do nothing, doesn't mean that I don't have a plan, my plan is to do nothing.
That sounds like an Oblivion NPC conversation holy moly xD
Is it just me, or has he lost the earrape mic?
"Hey, how's the weather?"
"IDK check it yourself, we're fucking outside."
They are the bane of my existence, I can’t stand it when people want to pry random ass information out of me just so they can judge me for it
so who you slept with lately? your blood group doin fine?
When were you born dd/mm/yyyy?
What is your credit/debit card number?
What is the CVC number of the credit/debit card? (3 numbers on the back)
This is not random information.
@@nigredoooalgown6245 so judgy when they say my credit score is too low 🙄
Wait... But if you don't like people getting actual information from you, you should love small talk. I'm confused.
@@hueyfreeman818 "I can’t stand it when people want to pry random ass information out of me " so ass long as the info isn't random it's fine! ;) :D
I love how his natural accent is slowly making it's way to the forefront. Grade still puts on a great performance; but, when he gets really annoyed, he goes native.
it sounds like hes plugging his nose
@@zedpwner Yeah, occasionally. His accent gets all over the place at times. But his actual accent is Indian (or whatever the proper term is). I just like how various accents poke through at random times. Accents make me laugh. I am a silly boy.
@@SamPanamaOfficial thats cute
> making it's way
> making it is way
> it is
Wonder what's making its way to the forefront of _yours_ …
3:15 "im great, thanks! wbu? ^_^" we all say in unison
"Nice weather we're having"
"Yes I love this snowday in late April" ffs
Are you in Colorado?
@@youtubedj9298 Slovenia: up to 30 degrees Celsius on 15th, "wet" snow on 16th
@@danijelujcic8644 same here in Colorado!
6:15 you should’ve said gaming, you could have a chance of the coworkers inviting you to play smash while taking edibles.
I've been watching grade since 2016 but this was honestly one of my favouites, i just hope he keeps uploading.
I think the reason small talk exists is because most people suck at conversations so they tend to go for the standard small talk options& because they work they never change em.
I feel the same way with questions about career.
Yeah, because as a biochemist, youre totally going to understand anything i tell you....
Lets talk anime instead eh?
Isn't this also the flaw when non-gamers ask about games...?
Lovely prions we're having today, eh?
I remember talking to someone about how I liked to ask new people what kind of music they listen to and they labelled it as “creepy”. Meanwhile I have LITERAL crackheads come up to me when I’m in the middle of the city, and I have a blast talking to them.
because they are not tied down with the "politeness" bullshit, they simply exist mostly miserably when not high, so they will actually talk about what they want to talk about, kinda ironic that people in those circumstances usually have the best conversations.
The crackheads are regular humans. Those other people are brainwashed robot NPCs that u need to get away from as far as possible
I agree with you fully, ive had this exact thought about small talk for years now, if it was normalized to ask deep/random questions to random strangers, conversations and my will to socialize would be so much stronger.
But unfortunately i guess the reality is that because theres so many of us, everyone has their own unique communication styles and personalities, which aren't always going to align with everyone elses, which is why they give you a strange look.
I also think theres like a social conformity aspect to it; if some guy asks a really random question to a bunch of strangers, chances are, even if someone wants to respond to it, they're going to conform to the majority - which is just staring at you silently as if youre some freak, too afraid to join in and be seen a freak aswell.
3:24 I love the haircut callback
You lie telling him that he did a good job. And then you pay him for it!
@@dougtheghoul2845 you pay him for fuckin your hair up!
"I'm more impressed than anything" lol
Working in a call center I don't mind customers occasionally starting small talk because it feels like a reprieve for a brief moment where we can just be real with each other. Like you get people who are garbage all day and one person asks how you are and pauses for an actual answer, not "how you doing, so anyway-" and then responds with "hope it gets better" just. It's nice.
At my work, we have this meeting called "weekly check-in", where coworkers talk about what they did their last weekend. I get why they might do it but I asked to be left out if possible because, you know, I'd rather finish work and be on schedule for my deadlines, and of course management said no. They just outright skip me now because every single time I replied with some variation of "Absolutely nothing, what about you, ?". I don't wanna be rude but if I were actually interested in their personal life I'd ask them about it myself.
Hum, that's very interesting... so... How's your little family, everybody is doing great?
Ah shit I forgot, I have to return some videos tapes. Have a good one!
I relate so much to this weird obligation of saying "Yeah it was good" in response to being asked about my day, I remember going back to uni and being asked if my Christmas break was any good and I responded honestly with "Nah, not really." which resulted in an awkward silence. For the record, a relative of mine had passed away and I didn't feel like I could say "Yeah it was great" in good faith, but I also couldn't explain why and drop my personal baggage onto them so they essentially never found out why I was so blunt lol
Did no one ask ?
It's kinda weird that not even one person asked either just immediately or just privately "why was it not that good then " or what happened
Offcourse you don't have to share it but thats a choice
Also really sad to hear condolences hope you're doing better now atleast and have you been able to recover?
@@randomrexy2135Oh don't worry haha it was over a year ago I'm all good, but thank you for asking haha
But yeah it was the first class back and they were just like "Oh, well then"
@@PeterGargan bruh that actually fucked up
But glad you're doing fine :)
9:00 old intro back
u mean outro
@AFrisbeeLad yes
I like the phrase “Living the dream”, because depending on how you say it, it can be positive or negative (in a relatable way).
Or you can just lie and say you’re day is going great because you found gold in your backyard or gave birth.
Actually, I am probably one of the only few people that always answers "How've you been?" with the genuine answer.
like if I'm having a full on depression I'd just say "dying, thanks! what about you?" or some shit like that
so do i lol
Get help.
I am not always fully genuine. If I am having a bad day, I will temper it significantly around most people and just say something like "eh, could be better". Most of the time though, my current mood is not all that significant, so I will just say something along the lines of "no complaints"
@@billschlafly4107 What kind of help would you recommend to our poor fellow here? I sure hope you have a genuine, useful answer and aren't just saying what you said to be a prick 🙂
Same. I have to manually remember that it's essentially an extended "hello". If I'm tired or distracted you'll get an honest answer.
what i find most irritating about the people that ask "what did you get up to on the weekend" is they likely sat around on the couch all weekend doing nothing but expect to be entertained with an adventure time story
2:00 One thing about this, in the former Czechoslovakian & Yugoslav states, it's normal to answer honestly, in fact saying good without any complaints, or when it's obviously a lie is frowned upon. I'm Canadian though, but I still use that rule, I don't care if it makes you uncomfortable, you ask, I answer. I don't lie.
True.
In Finland it's fifty-sixty... You may get a generic answer, or you may get a honest one. But honesty is pretty normal.
5:27 Social media, PC/video gaming, watching movies/shows, listening to music, and working out, all count as hobbies. The only problem is almost everyone does these things so it doesn't sound interesting to anybody.
Um, finding out common ground is how you engage out of the small talk part:
"oh yeah what games are you into?"
"See any good concerts recently?"
"You excited for *insert show/movie title*?"
"Where do you workout?"
These are called qualifying follow-ups. Now you know how to continue a conversation.
@@DeAthWaGer That's true. But I'm just saying a lot of people think you have to say something really cool when someone asks, "what are your hobbies?" Like playing a musical instrument or a sport.
@@professional.commentator Your hobby is your hobby. You don't need to impress anyone. If they don't engage with you, it makes the conversation end faster.
@@KrymsonScale I know that now but growing up I was sort of gaslit about what a hobby should be by boomers.
What helps me with small talk is to add an opinion to the conversation, try and have follow up questions, and just talk about yourself a little. I find that small talk is supposed to lead into big talk, but effort has to be made to lead into it. Of course the other person jas to engage back, so if they don't talk much then i know that they're not interested in talking, so i move on.
For example I try to mention my preference on the type of weather, and why my opinion is the way it is.
If someone tells you what they did over the weekend try to comment on it or ask a question. "Yeah i just hung around during the weekend" "oh nice like did you rest a lot or did you do a hobby or watch something? I like it when I have a weekend to slow down."
And worse come the worst you can just be a little honest. Anyone can understand a little "things haven't been the best for me" or "school or work has been hard" it's something that the other person can grab into to continue the conversation. Or talk about recent events, even if it's very mundane "I've heen watching a lot of history videos on yt lately, it's really interesting"
Sometimes you just have to jump the shark a little bit in a convo to get it to be less awkward.
I often tell strangers how bad my days are going. I'm disabled and rarely leave the house. Pain and suffering are the main events in my life, thanks for asking!
Wow, watching this video reminded me that I *used* to HATE Smalltalk, and now I'm doing it all the time.
I think the reason that the interesting questions are going unasked is that the "big" questions either require too much time to ask or get a useful answer out of. If it's someone I'm just meeting for the first time, I need to get to know the person before I can fully understand their answer since I won't have a frame of reference for their subjective interpretations of words. But when it's someone that I *do* know, I open with Smalltalk because the *real* thing I am asking when I ask "how's the weather?" is "would it be rude of me to talk to you about something mentally taxing?" Based on HOW they answer those low-mental-exhaustion questions, I can get a good read on if it's OK to ask more in-depth questions or if I should keep my questions to "small talk" so that I can show that I do care about the other person without wanting to mentally tax them in order to share that sentiment.
But I'm only articulating and realizing that I've been doing this because of this video. So TY GradeAUnderA!
The purpose of small talk is to tread lightly, and kind of find your way around someone before letting off actual questions. Playing it safe is just being courteous
People like you make people like my life a lot harder just tell me what you want (I'm autistic LOL)
@@crazycarpguy1074 I'm autistic too. We make life hard for ourselves. LOL So I agree with you.
Honestly, the only thing that really sucks about smalltalk is when it’s used as the full conversation.
In reality, I’m pretty sure smalltalk is meant to be used as an opener or an ice breaker to gauge if it’s appropriate or ok to open up to the juicier questions that grade mentions.
I could ask how the weather is, read the response of the other dude, and read the room before using that opening as a way to ask “you think aliens like to hide in the clouds then?”
Of course, gradeA here makes these videos for more comedic purposes, but I of course want to mention that small talk does have a purpose, even if it is kinda benign.
that whole mental process sounds extremely convoluted and mentally taxing far more than anything you could actually ask(that doesn't involve making time sensitive plans or paying money), why not just say what you mean?
Never seen this channel before but this 9 minute video just single-handedly answered a question I’ve been thinking about all day lmao
A buddy told me once, "Things that are interesting provoke concentrated thought."
I've kept that in mind ever since.
For real! Once I was talking to someone I knew for a short amount of time and they were like, "why do you ask these questions??", then I asked, "Does it bother you?", and they replied, "Not really... It's that you ask about stuff that I actually have to think about to answer."
Do you have any examples?🤔
@@hueyfreeman818 and why is that a problem? WHY
no genuinely
why did society just start accepting that?
i feel like body language might have some relation to it but being on the ASD and almost never talking to people irl, i really can't fathom the reason.
it's like people nowadays hate thinking.
The literal comment is a great example of its own point I feel @@MyProjectsTV
3:32 whos tryna tell grade susans not his boss anymore
Feels so good to hear that old outro ! Grats you got it back
With channels like sam o nella and his clones being popular it is a perfect that grade is back. People love their poorly drawn short videos
I 100% agree with what Grade is saying and hate small talk as it just makes things more awkward. We should start the new, better way he's suggesting and call it big talk because we'd mostly be talking about bigger, more interesting topics of conversation.
So instead of just starting a conversation with "Lovely weather lately, isn't it" or "How you been" we instead start by saying "hi wanna have a big talk" or some other variant of that sentence.
I mean even discussing what that actually means to someone would make for a much more interesting and engaging conversation than any kind of small talk.
There's actually a TED talk about just this... I think they even called it Big Talk, or somesuch.
Oh my God! Seeing the old outro back hit me with a wave of nostalgia I didn't know could be so potent!
We used paper maps bought at tourist shacks or tourist hot spots that sell them right there when you arrive off of the plane/ship. Right there in the airport, right there just off the pier. We also just asked for directions if the same language was spoken. If none of this was available or outright avoided, we just got lost. Oh, the fun.
lol, same
Sometimes somebody asks me how I am, I touch my pulse, wait a second, then I say "seems like I'm ok!"
small talk is supposed to help ease into a more interesting conversation but it just sucks when the whole conversation is just small talk
6:20 hahaha, the combo fart lmao
I suffer from depression and my answer to “how are you” or “how have you been” is almost always “not great”
Everytime i say "sh*tty" as always" people start questioning😂
I have depressions as well.
The only two beings i like talking to, are my dog and my GF.
Or animals in general.
Because they don't ask stupid questions
I just started going with "I'm alive"
Best answer to “how’s it going?” will always be “it’s going.”
"im about to yee my last haw"
I don't have depression but i always say i'm doing fine, because i don't want to ruin the mood. Obviously.
"Do you believe in aliens?" is a fantastic conversation starter. Thanks for the tip Grade!
I ligit don't know whats wrong with me when I'm around me crush ,I just use Smalltalk ,why do I fucking do this ,I've no Idea but I fucking do it and I hate doing it ,makes me look like I have nothing to do at *all* ! Normaly 'Doin' anythin' on the weekend 'en ?' I do it EVERY TIME
Mateeeeee! One of the next 2 videos is gonna be a video on how to master online dating, so I got you
Common Grade W
@@GradeAUnderA HELL YEAAAAAAAAH !
@GradeAUnderA Dude that would be sick. I'm having the hardest time getting matches and have no idea what I'm doing wrong
@@GradeAUnderA W grade
I have two societal problems with the question "how are you doing"/"how's it going"
1) I actually DO give an answer, whether it's good, neutral or negative, often with an explanation
2) I often forget to ask it back, making me look like an insensitive jerk who doesn't care about others' lives (which oftentimes I don't)
omg i have the same issue
Same
I like doing this too.
They asked and they shall recieve. If that doesn't get the conversation going, then at least they'll think twice before shoehorning that question at you again.
Don't worry, people like us may seem like insensitive jerks for not asking it back...but others sometimes seem like even more insensitive jerks for assuming we want to engage in small talk at all.
@@acedgamez147 That's a good way to look at it!
Honestly, my answer to "How've you been?" Is a blank stare and the question "Do you really wanna know, or is this just small talk?"
I get the same looks as "You believe in aliens?"
To be honest I am ok with the hobby one. I just tell them I watch stuff and play games.
And honestly with those being how I spend 70% of my free time, that could be a start of a genuinely interesting conversation.
yeah, i guess the weird part about the hobbies question is that far too often things that could count as hobbies are often not considered as such, like would watching movies count as having a hobby for watching movies? most people do watch them but i don't so i would count it, but how many others would?
i guess a better question would be "what do you do in your free time?" but that's somewhat lengthy and modern world hates slow things(ironic given how smalltalk outside of body language only extendes discussion for no good reason)
It's true about this when I don't feel comfortable talking about my depressing, procrastinating, & embarrassing life. But for the most part in any case, I don't really mind some of the questions when they have nothing to do with my personal life.
You should come to Finland! We are actually quite bad at small talk, and often start discussing small talk questions as if they were genuinely brought up as conversation topics :D
First Date: "If you were an old timey Pirate Captain, what would you name your ship?"
In-La-Pre-Nup!
Spanish Armada.
Seriously, wouldn't you run if you herd the Spanish Armada was coming? 😆
Chimeras Breath
De zuipschuit
Roughly translates to ‘the tankshack’
Crimson cat, because I like it
Oh shit! I told you in the last premiere that your old intro was in the public domain, glad to see it's come back.
I often tell people how I'm actually feeling unless I don't want to start a conversation.
The weather is actually very interesting, especially when one thinks about the results of nuclear tests and the fallout paths across an area.
Hell yeah now we're talking :p
@@MyProjectsTV ;-p
This was worth the 30 second unskippable ad.
Youve not even finished it yet
@@moltengears7483 nuh uh.
Unskippable, you say... Sponsorblock FTW!
@@6yjjk Same!
THIS CHANNEL STILL EXISTS! DAMN. I was crazy looking for it, to watch old videos
just to find he still uploads.
A sphere has 2 sides. And inside, and an outside. You're welcome.
So....Grade....got any plans for the weekend?
I mean.....thats not wrong.....
😳😳👍👍
Thanks, I was going to say this
In germany, some people start smalltalk by saying "na?"
And that would translate to "eh?"
Like, what am I supposed to answer?
Them: Hey
Me: Hallo
Them: Na?
Yeah well see you in hell
That's hilarious, in my country saying, 'na' would mean no. So going up to someone and saying that would confuse them while also giving you a funny look 😂
Na na na na, na na na na, he-e-eygood bye.
Just shrug back.
that was the CLEANEST sponsor segment