Pilot Lies About Speed to ATC | Cockpit Confessionals
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- Опубліковано 15 лип 2024
- Being part of an airline flight crew for the most part is fun. When its time for us to work we are professional, but these are some of the craziest / funniest pilot and flight attendant stories I have heard over the years.
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Chapters:
0:00 Intro
0:56 Show Me The Money
2:56 Texas 250
5:49 I Love That Plane
8:06 Vibrating Bag
10:33 Code Brown
When I did my navigation flight test for my PPL, the examiner gave me a route I wasn't happy with. The route as planned would have put me back at base with no fuel for a divertion. I told the examiner this and he said "Are you going to fly today or not?" I took another look at the route and asked who was PIC on this flight. He said "You are" so, my heart thumping like crazy I said "Well, sir, if you insist on this route, in my opinion it isnt safe to end up back here with insufficient fuel for a diversion." He looked at me coldly and said "THis airport hardly ever closes." I said "No, you're right....but it could." There was a moment of awful silence before he broke into a smile and said "Well done! NEVER let anyone, no matter how senior or experienced, bully you into taking a flight your not happy with. If you had agreed to fly the route, I would have failed you before we even boarded." He amended the route and I passed the checkride.
Wait serious? That happens? Wasn’t he just bullying you into failing if you were to agree to the route?
@@BodhiGeraci I wondered this too but I think there's a high level of necessary confidence needed and certainty with what you're doing. And one failed checkride wouldn't be the end.
Nice! That is a great instructor and you sir passed with FLYING colors!
I'm no RL aviator or pilot but I do have a strong interest in aviation. I've read a few similar accounts to yours, in this instance, where a F/O has over-ridden their Captain's decision about safety of the plane and refused to fly it with them.
Like someone else has said here, if it don't look or feel right then don't do it. Well done on making that decision and hope that your flying career is taking off (pun intended 😉)! 👍🏼
That's as skilled examiner and IMO that's the point of practical exams, your judgement can be assessed in a way that it cannot on a written exam. When I was taking oral boards for Anesthesiology the senior examiner tried to get me to make a plan to anesthetize someone for a valve replacement who had critical aortic stenosis (very serious condition with a high risk of arrest on induction) without ability to place an arterial catheter (used to measure blood pressure constantly). He kept coming up with reasons to proceed even though it was not possible to place an arterial catheter. I wouldn't budge and finally he just broke a smile. I knew then the boards would be easy, I'd just use my best judgement and do the right thing and that's what they were looking for.
Kelsey: I'm not involved in any of these stories
Also Kelsey: So Sarah, if you're watching, sorry
😂
I died!
He should have told her that there is no need for battery driven appliances when he's around.
BA ;D
i guess some girls just need a B.O.B. ( battery operated boyfriend }
“You just focus on not crapping your pants” that’s such a good friend even if he didn’t make it 🤣
I was thinking similar things. He did everything he could for his friend including lying to his passengers and bringing what was needed then never mentioning it.
Man, I feel for that dude who crapped his pants. It's easy to laugh and joke about it, but IBD affects a lot of people. If you've never experienced it, it's hard to relate to. When it's liquid and your body wants it out, a sphincter is a terrible line of defense!
So, so true lol
It does suck. Shat my pants that way, while working at a shop. Wasn't a great day. It is rare for me, but I feel for people that deal with it in a confined workspace...
Bathroom issues aren't fun! I'm so thankful for stores and places that have restrooms.
I am careful what I eat when I know I'll be confined like that. It is disappointing how many places do not have public bathrooms or lock them early. Especially since covid, many businesses have closed off their bathrooms completely....
At least he had the best possible colleague for this situation. Kelsey did a great job :D
“My sick tummy is south of the equator.”
I’m dying! 🤣🤣🤣
Time stamp?
@@VelocityEditsuwu 12:41
Reminds me of Joe saying to Quagmire “Quagmire, I have pooopys.”
@Mohammad Al Hussein PAGY Neither did I, and I have a pretty strong understanding of slang.
Having to poop sounds to me like "my sick tummy is north of the equator'. That is why I didn't get it.
Clever man using big words to say that his issue was the otkher side
“Son, this is a Texas 250”. 😂 !!!
Southwest is the shit.
Yes, indeed, it is Southwest. They fly out of Dallas Love Field!
The old Tokyo sandblaster
@@PilotBossify yup 😂
@@747-pilot This is what I was thinking. Met several of them. Always a great time. 😂
My takeaway from this video: To avert Code Brown do a Texas 250.
@Dennis White...🛫🛬💩oops😷
💀
"I never told anyone about it"....until now when I shared the vibrator story with half a million people. Sorry Sarah!
🤣 I'm dying, the vibrator! And soon as he mentioned her bag, I said something of the "personal massager variety" is going to fall out or go off. Sure enough 🤣🤣🤣
When your 30 mins away but your taco bell is on short final-
Im still laughing i had to come back 10 min later and like this comment haha
I edited it a while ago I don’t remember why I did that 😂
@@74gear
bradley small
1 second ago
in a video i saw-- LBJ was some sort of observer during ww2 and got to a plane and sat in it quite a while waiting for the mission to start.. I think there were only a few planes on the mission and he got off to go to the bathroom and returned to another plane for the mission which took place. The plane he was first waiting on crashed losing all occupants a total tragedy.. So this code,brown situation saVED HIS LIFE on that day and i know you are not political but it influenced 11/22/63 and his presidency years later...
I personally had a few code brown situations in my toyota tacoma- when you get old it happens... perhaps the fa had a code brown urgency in your plane and wanted to land while up in your cessna.. have you figured how much it costs to operate a cessna per hour. Are you aware of micah flies helicopter vids in california..
@@anand-menon Squawk 7 - poop - 00
That's Taco Bell on short final when the gear is still up...🤪
Captain: “This airline that flies into Texas a lot...”
Me: Southwest!
Yep I guessed right a way too. Only airline I know that goes right from taxi to takeoff without stopping!
“Taxiing quickly” excluded AA!
OMG, I can’t believe he actually admitted to a fellow crew member that they had an annual competition in which they flew drunk on purpose...🙄
I like how you acted super naive toward the vibrating noise. There’s NO WAY you didn’t know that was a vibrator 🤣🤣🤣.
You obviously never had an electric shaver go off in a carry on. Sounds and feels about the same and since ladies do shave... Not everyone carries those in a tool case made for those and made to avoid accidentally having it go off when handling luggage. I too wouldn't necessarily think of an adult toy. Also, there's so much so called medical massage stuff that works with vibrating. What the hell does anyone know what the next person carries along and if the stuff isn't just thrown in willy nilly.
@@CologneCarter My electric toothbrush did the same.
What is wrong with vibrator? If the girl just wants to relax after work and not going around the bar to pick someone else and feel like a slut afterwards. Nothing to be ashamed about.
What's a vibrator? 🤔
@@johno9507 you serious? If you are I would recommend deleting the comment as you are going to get a shock
Speaking of code brown. My dad told me about a situation back in the 70s, a private pilot apparently had to take a dump mid-flight. He drops it into a bag and then opened the window and pushed it out. When he landed the controllers gave him the callsign brown streak. The crap left a noticeable brown streak down the side of the plane.
Haha to funny he thought he was slick and got busted.
@@emmamadison8538 he thought he was slick, but he left an oil slick!
Nah, it's just paint!
But... what about the people in the flight path on the ground? I am well acquainted with the situatuin, I too had an incident in the UK read it above.
Imao imagine if it went into the engine
When I was flying corporate, I had a code "yellow" and we were still an hour away, from landing, and no toilet onboard.
My captain was no help because he now began telling me jokes and doing impersonations, which he did quite well.
Long story short. I barely made it to the restroom facilities.
Ti, if you're reading this, it was always great flying with you, even if you did try to have me, literally, piss my pants!
Are you a woman?
For a man, that's pretty simple. Just find an empty bottle to dump your "yellow code". Why hold for an hour?
Being a 20 year trucking vet, I can tell you this.
Even though I'm not cruising at altitude, I am stuck in my truck, and when the urge hits you, you can't just pull into a gas station, pulling a 53' or triple trailer, so, there have been some really close calls over the years... LOL!
It's not a Code Brown thing, but I see PET bottles of yellow liquid tossed on the sides of highways here in Japan quite often. Stopping just doesn't seem to be an option, regardless of which country one's in.
Yikes, a triple trailer? They're not legal here but I remember seeing them in heavy wind and nearly having my own code brown. I'm the guy that can't back up a boat trailer but I do let trucks into traffic when no one else will.
"My sick tummy is south of the equator" I gotta remember that one
@10:30 - Kelsey (3 years ago) : "Sarah, your secret's safe with me."
Kelsey (November 1, 2020): "Sarah, if you're watching... umm, sorry. " 😆
A relative of mine was on a cross country in a small private plane.
He/she had a "brown emergency" and utilized a 2 quart cooler in flight for his/her lavatory.
Upon landing (private airport) he/she exited the plane with "the cooler" onto a small red carpet (private airport, they went the extra mile).
Ground staff tried grabbing the cooler from (my relative) with the intent of refilling the ice (ha!).
The tug-of-war that ensued over the cooler will live forever in our family's aviation lore.
Why didn’t you use "they", "them" or "their" to tell your story instead of "he/she" ?
I've never been a pilot (apart from student years ago) but I've had a similar experience as a bus driver with a full load of 55 passengers returning home in the evening. Fortunately, at the point where my sphincter muscles were about to give way and I was close to a panic attack, I came across a recreational park with a toilet. No pleasantries or passenger announcements; just total desertion of the bus and the momentum to break down the door if it had been occupied.
I LOL'ed!
You gotta do what you gotta do! I teach and have my own stomach issues, and never had a bathroom remotely close to my room. You NEVER EVER leave middle schoolers (or high schoolers as I now have) alone because best case scenario someone ends up at the nurse worst case you do t have a school anymore. I had to call the office more than once while I sat clenching like crazy until someone would pop their head in for me to quickly shuffle away.
2 years ago when I was standing watch on the quarterdeck of my barge at about 0230, I had about 3 hours of watch left and had a similar situation. We had a berthing barge because our ship LHD 8 was under heavy maintenance.
I couldn't leave my station to use the head because we had to run the sewage pumps on the barge and my watch buddy was off doing that for a while since he had never done it before.
Thought I could let out a tiny fart to lessen the pressure on my sphincter, but that good ol' Navy taco tuesday got the best of me. That tiny little poot started as a tiny little poot, and ended in liquid poo.
Once he got back I asked the officer of the deck if I could go to berthing real quick, he asked why.
I straight up told him "I shit my pants sir", and he let me go to berthing.
Between the end of my watch and turnover he told me about one of the chiefs standing OOD who shit himself on watch on a taco tuesday.
That story is hilarious. I’m going to start using the word poot now.
I'm sorry for laughing at you but this story has my sides hurting I'm laughing so hard. 🤣🤣
Thank you for sharing.
“Put this plane down before I have to call a code brown.”
“I have a number for you to call” lol
Ive seen lots of people jump from aircraft after someone farts.
XD
Gotta squawk 7💩00 fast!
😄
'Sit tight' and 'Dumping fuel' takes on a whole new meaning!
Having said that, I have a family member that has Colitis, it's no joke!
“You focus on not crapping your pants, I’ll land the plane!” Sweet Jesus!!
Kelsey: "Just sit tight, man."
Co-pilot thinks: I've never sat tighter.
Sitting down only makes it worst.
My rule of thumb, having learned the hard way - never fly unless the plane has two engines and one bathroom...
So in other words, don't fly a light aircraft
Why only one bathroom?
@@Vousie More than one is even better LOL
@Anonymous Guy This isn't Kerbal Space Program, spontaneous unplanned disassembly of that nature isn't going to happen.
🤣
Say's it wasn't him, remembers every detail of story and tells it perfect.
Quite some time ago I had a friend that was a pilot at Norwegian. He told a story about how they always had a little challenge between the pilot and copilot. You know how the captain always comes on the intercom and gives like a little flight information etc. The copilot would give him one word that he would have to put somewhere in his speech. This particular time it was the word ''butf'ck'' 😅 I guess it was a 737 something with 100+ passengers. He took the challenge. They were flying from London to somewhere south of France or Italy or something. He decided to rams up a couple of names of cities they would fly over trying to announce them as much as possible in the French way. Like Calais - Paris- Lion- Budfuque- etc. 😆 He got away with it. Wonder if there was any Frenchman on the plane thinking hmm Budfuque is a place I have never heard of 😏
😂
😅
Pilot trying to hold it in:
*I feel the need, the need for speed*
NEVER trust a fart especially when you've got the runs or a hangover.
😂😂😂😂😂
ROFLMAO! 😂
Never trust a fart after 50
I’m a nurse - we call those “sharts” or “coming in for a landing”! 😂
Best advice my uncle ever gave me when I was a lil kid 😂
"maybe its an electric shaver" - oh you.
"a storm was holding over the airport."
Don't mess with ATC, people. If they can command a storm into a holding pattern...
Cumulus N87529 turn right heading 020
ATC's are actually sons of Poseidon
Hahaha 🤣 oh man that's a good one
I immediately thought vibrator when I saw, "your bag is vibrating
Ikr!
It took me half a second and I was like ohhhh
Why is it that humans always skip to the dirtiest conclusion in situations like these. "Your bag is vibrating", um, yep that's definitely a vibrator... We completely skip past noise making toys, phones, tablets, etc, and we always skip to the worst one. IDK why, we just do.
Man I love when he says 'my sick tummy is south of the Equator ' man this made my day :)
LOL
i just would say: i have to shit, fly fast^^
Plot twist: he was the person that did all of this
Hmm 🤔
His hair line says it all .
No not the lying about flight time
Not this guy. Maybe one of them definitely not all of them
😂😂😂💯
I've watched and re-watched this episode of Cockpit Confessionals over & over & over again. It's just too good! In fact it's 1 of my favorite parts of 74Gear!
Poor guy...what a torturous and humiliating situation. Our guts don't care where we are or who is around when they decide its time to move out!
The body is truly a marvelous machine able to recognize a foreign invader, immediately going to work to expel it. This type of expulsion is never a kind, gentle, pretty or comfortable process but so vital to our survival.
69 likes... tehe, nice.
😂😂😂😂😂😂
@@msr1116 it's basically kicked out the back door😂😂😂😂😂😂
True story: I knew of an F-14 pilot who had eaten at the VIP table at an NFL game he was invited to. One of the delicacies was chocolate fudge cake with a heavy chocolate sauce on top. This pilot helped himself to a huge slice. After the event, he and his NFO climb into their F-14 for the flight back to Virginia. At cruising altitude, the chocolate cake went volcanic in his intestinal tract. He asked for priority handling from ATC into Oceana, he managed to get on deck but shit himself into his flight suit before he could clear his airplane.
Oh no! Really, that flight suit needed a good cleaning.
@@Persian-Immortal that is hilarious 😂 ....it happens to the best of us....just pray it’s not the beginning of a 12 hr flight......do you have anything to declare.....mmm
There's a great recording of an F-15 pilot and his WSO on a training flight, and the backseat just filled his suit. And they decided they'd return to base and keyed up on the radio to say there was a problem with the Bravo, it was not an emergency, but they needed to go back to base. Of course they wanted to know the nature of the problem. So the Backseat guy said hang on I'll tell him, and on the radio with everyone listening blurted out what happened, and the pilot just burst out laughing. Got approval, though. You could tell the pilot made his mask as tight as he couuld
@@saborwolf I remember hearing one similar - but I think it was a different one - where a flight of 2 or 3 was taxiing out for takeoff, and one guy calls that he needs to return to the ramp. There ensues a slightly confused discussion and finally the truth comes out, and again, everyone is laughing so hard on frequency they can hardly communicate clearly...
Eject now!!!
Hahaha! The “code brown” one!!! Maaaaaan this must have been “Chuck’s” worst day of his life!!! 😂
As part of a USAF flight crew out of Dyess I'm used to hearing these types of stories. The rule is, the story has to start with "There I was . . . . "
Pilot Poopy Pants: "Don't look at me, don't look at me!"
Kelsey: Stares unblinking in to other pilots eyes.
I love it
So funny - what an image your comment brought to mind!
Speaking of pilot's nick names
Mayday mayday we got a code brown requesting immediate landing !
Thx for 20 likes it’s rlly epic
:D
Also I absolutely loved this episode of cockpit confessionals
24 likes already great job guys !
Requesting for immediate loading lolol well unloading
Here is one for you! Back in the late 1990's I was working in China and ended up in Hong Kong to renew a visa. Ended up in a bar in Kowloon and met up with an Australian 747 flight crew. (It was in the days when they had a Pilot, Co-Pilot and Flight Engineer) It was about 2 AM and everyone was absolutely rotten drunk, and these guys were supposed to be flying out at 6 AM. I was talking to the Flight Engineer as he was the less pissed of the bunch, and could carry a conversation. One of the guys was slumped over the table, totally out of it, pissed out of his head on spirits, and I said to the Flight Engineer, "Jesus. if your captain sees the state you guys are in he will go Ape shit" The Engineer looks up, swigs another whisky, smiles and in a broad Australian accent says to me "Mate, that IS the fucXing captain!" Glad I wasn't on that early one out of HK! But a solid bunch, made in the same spirit as that other great Australian Airline, Ansett, lovely people!
Addicted to your channel. I grew up in aviation, literally. My dad was a pilot/mechanic/owner and operator of and airport in Manitoba, He passed away when I was young but my mom kept the business going for many a year until things went pear shaped. To say the least and we had to move, that was 20 years ago. Despite having to move on, and try and live a 'normal' life, I still have the urge to fly flowing threw my veins. Your channel and others like it ( Trent Palmer, Mike Patey, Mentour Pilot, Flight Test, Peter Sripol) have kept me sane, And have a hard time trying to comprehend the scale of a 747. We had to move it was to the city and to a 3 story apartment, and to hear you say that's the view from the cock pit, ground level, is mind blowing. I spent many an hour on the balcony looking out, a country kid, thinking this was awesome. I now know I was terribly mistaken, that Balcony could have been taxiing. IF for what ever reason your ever in YWG, i'd like to buy you a Tim's and say thanks for all the great information, not just content.
i flew on south west a few years back and remember the engines throttling to full power while we were still turning onto the runway. texas 250
I used to have to fly southwest Houston to Harlingen 2ce a week. Those guys did exactly this both ways. It was awesome.
That literally happened to me going out of LAX to phoenix
I have almost only ever flown Southwest, and I'm just now learning that that's not how you're supposed to do it.
I play Microsoft Flight Simulator 2020, and throttle up as I'm turning onto the stripes.
I'm just now learning that my bad pretend pilot habits are built into me because I am the offspring of a 35+ year SWA employee. 🤔
Ladies and Gentleman, this is the copilot speaking. Do we have any Baby's on Board? Our captain needs a fresh diaper.
😂😂
LoL eeewwww
There is no question a demon child on every airline flight across the face of this earth.
Lol
@@Soniphex I was staring the possibility of Tokyo to Munich the row in front of the demon child in the face, once. Suddenly a apparently-deaf German businessman asks to swap with me to the other side of the plane (the lower deck of an A380), only too happy!
i work for a major airline and I’ve had to replace an F/O seat cushion and cover, he lost the battle also 😂. I think we’ve danced on the edge of that blade once or twice. Kudos to you for being a bro and helping him out.
You never brought it up again... until now, in front of the entire world
We all know that the Second Story was a flight on Southwest. Lonestar!
My dad used to joke that Southwest's quick takeoff and landing was because they paid for runway fees by the foot.
@@ki5aok That is probably true LOL!
United.
I thought the same thing. I've known a few ATC who have always said if they needed to squeeze an aircraft take off before the next plane comes in they give it to the cowboys who were always down for speeding their asses up to the runway and taking off lol
Southwest tends to lie about their speed and loves going fast.
I’ve jump seated with that airline several times and saw much of what you described. Once, while being followed by XXX at 8,000 feet, ATC asked for my “indicated.” “250,” I said. “XXX, say your indicated.” “250,” they said. AYC replied, “ Well, your 250 is 60 knots faster than (my) 250.”
LOL, SWA
@@ghostrider-be9ek huh...
lool
@@Whimsiio southwest
@@triplej8666 i mean why lol..
Oh Kelsey, loving the channel fella. Just discovered it, not laughed so hard as I do at these pilot confessionals for a long time. Brilliant!
Keep up the good work! ✈️
you know the captain in that last story was probably so traumatized that he walks around with a bucket to this day.
I once refused a flight because i had already shit 3 times that day and my guts hurt and there was no way i was making it 4 hrs without a bathroom in a ratty kingair. I wasnt popular with the company after that, but it beats the alternative.
The phrases "Just sit tight man, imma fly this as fast as I can" and "then I start dumping everything" at about 13:25 can be understood in so many different ways, depending on context :D
HAHAHAHA
“My sick tummy is south of the equator” made me scream
Respect for helping your colleague out so much like that, just helped him during a time of personal desperation - what a bro.
I just get SO happy whenever you post! Especially cockpit confessions and flight attendant pranks! Your personality is just perfect for this!
Thanks for staying here!!
I love his username being 74 gear and G being the 7th letter in the alphabet thus completing his username as 747
I was an avionics technician/engineer on F-15's, F-16's, F-111's, and KC-135's. It's been years since reminiscing and this brings me back a bit. Thanks for the vids brother!!!
I’m 13 I’m starting to train coastguard already, tomorrow. I can’t apply for a few more years but I need to get in shape for it. Coastguard helicopter pilot here I come
Awesome!!! Go after your dream!!
If you can join Sea Scouts do it. Try for learning as much as you can. A friend of mine did that and went into the Coast Guard at a higher wage grade than the other recruits and was given leadership opportunities in boot camp. She was given her first choice of location for her first post and got posted in Hawaii.
He must have been flying by the seat of his pants geez 🙄
One of these days one of the cockpit confessional stories is going to be Kelsey accidently sending the story title to dispatch in ACARS.
He could easily explain that one. I don't think there is anything illegal about typing random stuff in ACARS while you are waiting or something.
@@A.Lifecraft Oh yeah, I doubt anything bad would happen as a result. But it would be a hilarious story!
Having a confessional hotline is actually a great idea, better even than ASRS alone to make aviation safer.
Let her? You MADE Stella fly! Actually, that might be the only way to get me to fly again.
Hi Kelsey ! Im a guy from Spain and I just discovered your channel one month ago and I subcribed straight ago.It is amazing!
I have been working as a cabin chief for the last 15 years.Not working right now due to covid 19 and I miss flying a lot.
I love your videos ,keep up the good work and wish you safe flights up there.
greetings from Spain
"Known for flying and taxiing rather quickly". Oh, you mean South West?
Dead give away...that and sending gifts and pizza to ATC - guess that ‘rumor’ about them spans the industry. 😬
Duh! SW = Unsafe
I was guessing either American or Southwest but “known for fast taxi” is definitely Southwest.
My first thought was Continental (now United), because they have a hub in Houston, but the fast taxi part was a dead giveaway for Southwest.
hi jacob
Kelsey, this was the funniest video I’ve seen. Your story telling is perfect!!
Oh my God! “Here, crap in this bag!“… funniest aviation story I’ve ever heard, Kelsey!
That second story was hilarious. Gotta love SW pilots
As a retired Air Traffic Controller, that has checked out to FPL in 3 different Centers, ZMP, ZME and ZAN, Sir do I have some stories for you. Great videos Kelsey.
Gracious alive, I sure do love Aviation and the stories shared! God Bless!
13:10
"Sit tight" literally.
I can't describe how much respect and love I got for you! I really admire people who talk about their passion. it's just something in their eyes 😍🙏🏼
Please don't kidnap him.
Pilots: Sarah why did you bring that?! There are two of us. 🤣
Flight attendant wasn't smart enough to take the batteries out first?! 🤣 rookie move.
Other "Pilots" have popped up, trying to mimic ur videos ..but urs r Truly The Best! Very Informative & Humble ..as u Always admit when u have made the same mistakes 😌
Seems common among aviators. I know that when Blue Angels debrief each individual is expected to- not only own up to their mistakes, but bring them up themselves and explain how they will correct it moving forward. I always loved that high level personal responsibility/accountability, self awareness and intellectual honesty. More aviation youtubers are a wonderful thing, but yeah, this guy is awesome!
Kelsey. I love these stories!!! Deep from the trenches of the flight deck!
Keep em coming!
love this series please keep these videos coming!! Love your content! I want to be a pilot when I get older!
Glad you enjoy the videos!
This made my whole day, really picked me up! Thank you
Hi , keep up your Captain's stories they are the best. The "bring me two t-shirts , pants etc.. story" was absolutely hilarious. I laughed so much I cried. "You know it's only rock and roll."
I LUV how discreet you are!
I figured it was AA because they were known for aggressiveness back in the 1980s and 90s under Crandall, but I should’ve known it was SW.
I think you had a really great colleague in that last one! To have the initiative to call for the air pump 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
Where I worked we did some maintenance manuals for Air Force support carts. I illustrated the schematics that show the electrical, data, hydraulics and heating/AC for the carts. The schematics traced from the control to the equipment. I got bored so I added a bogus line that terminated in a small ceramic toilet. The writer was at first puzzled by the extra line, then burst out laughing when he traced it to the commode. It wasn’t in the final illustration, just in a temp file I made for the occasion. He pinned it up at his workstation. There are not a lot of laughs in the tech pub business and the guys appreciated my sense of humor.
I once had a full bowl evacuation as we took off from London for New York. I was in business class with my very senior boss sitting in front. It came as a complete surprise and presaged an illness that confined me to my hotel room for a week afterwards. I am proud to say that, with the help of a trusted purser, and the good fortune of flying with hand luggage only, I managed to remedy the situation with nobody suspecting (or being kind enough to pretend). Just to emphasise that this was a full evacuation at about 6-7 on the Bristol Stood Chart, possibly a good pint or so. Thank God for Delta Airlines’ wipe clean leatherette seat material.
Oh my word, that reminds me of a story when I was flying as SLF. I boarded the aircraft and all was well. I might have had a few too many free beers to drink and then I fell asleep. I woke up just when we were on final approach. The seat belt signs were on but I decided to ignore them anyway and proceeded to walk to the toilet at the back. The flight attendant who was sitting in her jump seat there told me to go back to my seat. I patiently explained my situation to her, but she was adamant that I had to sit down and buckle up. I warned her that if I didn't pee NOW or she might have a smelly wet seat to clean up, but I had to return to my seat anyway. She was very good though. As soon as the spoilers were retracted she came to me and said I could use the toilet. I just barely managed to hold it in, so she didn't have a smelly wet seat to clean up and I didn't have any smelly wet pants to wear for the rest of day That is my little story about me for the night, so I bid you good night :)
I'm not a pilot or into aviation but I love this channel! Great job kelsey🙂 👏
This is by far in my top 5 favs of your vids 🤣😂🤣 I think I tee teed myself 🤫🤷♀️ I hope we get to hear more of these stories. Thanks for the laughs 😘
I laughed so hard at the Code Brown story I was crying! 🤦♂️ So it’s not just in my line of work that we have to deal with these Codes! 😂🤦♂️ Love your channel! Thanks for the great tips to low hour pilots like myself! 👍
"Accidently activated her vibrator" This made my day!!!
If he craped himself due to touchdown, I can't imagine what would happened if he was flying on ryanair
Dude, his pants were Colm Meaney in Die Hard 2. Touchdown = explosion.
It would blow a hole through the seat
O'Leary would probably charge him a year's salary for seat dry cleaning...
It would set off a ejecter seat
Better than that British Airways 747.
10:44 the way that you say 'a some of you know that have been on the channel for a while you know back in the day i used to fly private jets' really makes it sound like it's you
8:07 Nine times out of ten it's an electric razor, but every once in a while...
Pan Pan! I'm declaring a stool emergency! Request emergency landing and a gate near a bathroom, Over!
An airline that taxi’s quickly............Hmm, I wonder who that could be? “*cough* *cough* est”🤣
Southwest? Been there done that
Crazy how much a youtube can influence you. Love your videos brother!
I don't know what's funnier, the story about the Captain with intestinal misery or all the posted comments I've been reading regarding this video. LOL!!! Thanks Kelsey, your a delight to listen to.
Felt so bad for that last guy
This has to be the funniest 💩 I've ever heard in aviation!
Glad you liked it Samuel. 👍
Just new to your channel and got to say I love your content mate. I'm still laughing at the "you saying you have commitment issues" joke from your other video 🤣🤣
There are 2 types of people. People who have shit themselves, and people who are going to shit themselves.