finding a new job. of course, this takes a few months of soul search - what went wrong, what can i do better to see the red flags next time, what have i learned so i don't carry these toxic traits onto other places. also setting expectations that the new job might just be a place to chill before you go full throttle again at another place, and that's ok.
Never give 100 percent at job. Perform only what you are paid for. Being too good doesn’t gain any rewards. Only gets dumped with more work that is just abuse because they’d say “you are there and you showed up”. They’d slack of and won’t have initiative if someone can do it all.
Seeing things for what they are. A toxic work environment is a toxic environment. It doesn't say anything about me, my capabilities, and my future. A lot of people do not know that they are "toxic" because of different worldviews and experiences. Remembering that we can choose to deal with it or to leave and find a better workplace to grow.
I’m honestly terrified of getting another job and I fear I’ll deal with this again. It is such a horrible experience and I worked so hard and made so many excuses for the toxicity. I research all of the places I’m going to apply too and I just fear they all will be the same.
I assure you no Work Place is the same, respect your observation major league and there are some bad people out there (not all). You Can Do It and make it happen.
If you’re unlucky like me it seems to repeat itself until we stop running away and learn to deal with it. Those people should not have power over us compassionate sensitive souls this isn’t their world.
1. Acknowledge 2. Be Kind Yourself 3. Stop Blaming Yourself 4. Process the Hurt e.g. therapy, yoga and meditation 5. Reality Check e.g. you are worthy 6. Rebuild your confidence e.g. its going to come up sometimes, implement confidence boosters
@@HighSpeedNoDrag so it was a typical Wednesday night. You've never been in a toxic environment in your life. You have no idea how coworkers and particularly bosses can undermine your career and social life. I live in a small village my bosses were from the same village. They spread lies to keep me a subordinate. Now I can't get a job within 30 miles. I now have to drive 40 minutes to work. Can't get a date with a girl within 30 miles either. Some people WILL destroy your life if you don't be an all encompassing compliant beech regardless of ethics.
@@scottfeuerhammer3595 Calm down dude and I have been in Toxic Chernoblyl type environment(s) for the last 25 years plus. I believe you regarding your hardships and the offenders can be very dangerous and Never Underestimate any of them. It's almost like we need the Target's Hand Book to being a target and how to roll but of course it's not issued to us. Lastly, it's better to date a woman well outside your A.O. and good luck.
I just love how PTSD is used so loosely here. Lol. You dont have PTSD. Unless you're fresh back from the battlefield, you do not suffer from it. You had a bad experience. Suck it up and move along.
This conversation is so important. We downplay what happens in work environments all the time. I ended up developing a form of PTSD from a bad boss, and didn't realize it until years later. I had been refusing to acknowledge what I experienced as trauma, which prevented me from processing and moving on.
I'm glad you were able to identify it. How are you doing now, Gibby? Honestly, I find so much of the conversation about toxic workplace fluffy. It's fine if you are dealing with a bad boss or company that isn't a fit - but a toxic work environment is corrosive and it does result in trauma at a range of levels. Thank you for sharing your story here, someone is going to read it and get help because of it 💜
People usually say “it happens everywhere-“ no it doesn’t happen everywhere. I have survived places that have used my trauma against me and it really hurt especially after they claimed to be my “family.” And I really needed that. Another thing that happened was that I was held back because of how slow I was I couldn’t compete with others and that’s something that I don’t blame myself for anymore. It’s still hard to stand up for myself and what I need because I’m used to just letting people use me. I don’t know how to negotiate what I need especially when I know they need something from me that I won’t be able to give it to them. And sometimes I just need an open person who cares enough to hear that and let it be. I just left a bad place to work and got hired at another place that I think is nicer- and am honestly dreading it because I didn’t have time for myself, I’ve gone through a lot in the past year and would just like to have a vacation. But we all need money, and the pressure gets high sometimes. Should have picked something more simple and less complicated. Oh well.
@@999timepass I live in a world where my mind isn't weak enough to claim PTSD over a job. Let alone commit suicide over it. Yall have too many fake feelings. Consequences of growing up in the "Participation Trophy" Era. Welcome to the real world.
A supportive therapist helps. I worked in two consecutive toxic workplaces and still replay abusive encounters and scenarios in my head. It's hard to fully shake it, even years later.
Hit the nail on the head, my mom would say I am too judgmental or ungrateful, she only worked 7 years in her whole life & then brag to me how she gets along with everyone so well. I would love to put her in my work environment & see how well she would do.
Facts! People in the community believe I’m the problem. That manager was so cunning. I hate it. But knowing God is my source I had to learn to let it be.
I worked for a toxic company for 12 years and it affected me for the next 16 years after that, i’m still jaded about how I’ve been treated throughout my career
I totally agree with you. I started a new job 2 weeks ago and it was a very toxic working environment. The staff were rude, gossiping about each other, manager not trusting staff. Imagine on my first day the staff were gossiping to me about other colleagues. I informed my manager about some personal issues I had at home . One of my colleagues mentioned it to me by accident. I was shocked she found out. That’s soo unprofessional. I literally walked out on my lunch break and didn’t return. How can a manager be soo toxic and discuss my business with other colleagues. This work place gave me such bad anxiety there was no team at all. I’m soo happy I got out sooner than later.
Brooo I had the same experience, it’s been like 2 weeks now but I had this lumber job with a very toxic workplace. So I left, I did not feel comfortable with the job and it was toxic. The worst part is that my friends are almost shaming me, I almost don’t wanna talk to them anymore because they say it’s all my fault
@@mickraymond8824 Sorry to hear that Mike. Don't let them get you down, who feels it knows it.. They can only comment and disagree with you're decision but their not the ones going through it, you are. Anxiety and stress is not good for your health. You deserve better. Just do any job to keep some money coming in. Just for future reference dont tell your friends everything. Friends and family can be our biggest critics and they play a big part in our mental health declining at times. ❤
I left my job a month ago. I’ve been battling with the trauma from my toxic work environment. I’ve worked there for 2 and a half years. I wanted to leave. However, I stayed because I felt that financially supporting my daughter was important. During my last month there, my mental and physical health was deteriorating. I was having panic attacks. My boss and three coworkers were constantly gaslighting and undermining my work. I’m still healing. But I’m glad that I left that place behind.
It’s worth mentioning why the toxic workplace exists. They are simply leveraging the power they have over you by providing your living money. If you lose that fear, they lose a lot of their ability to mess with you.... easier said than done. I hope all recover that need it
This video is perfect!!! I had a horrible work experience. I just quit my job last week. I was working as a waitress and I dealt with rude customers and coworkers. My manager was rude to me and everyone in the kitchen. She would yell at me for every little thing. Another coworker called me fat. My name is Jessica and there was another waitress with the same name as me. One of the cooks in the kitchen said to me “I’m gonna call you fat Jessica so I don’t get you and the other Jessica confused”. That was my last day working there. Can’t wait to recover from working this shitty place ✌🏻
There is one job that really broke me and my confidence. I don't think bosses realize what an impact they have on employees when they treat the employee so poorly. It has been 2 years since I have gotten out of that horrific job. I was lucky that I was able to take a few months off and lived off of savings. I focused on art, music and things I really enjoyed and was good at. My confidence slowly started to come back these days I am working for the family business and thriving. There is life and hope after a traumatic and toxic work environment.
I left a toxic workplace (worked there for five years) over three years ago and I still have leftover coping mechanisms from that experience. My therapist said that I was constantly looking for a fight with my current boss because I had to do that at my old job. It still feels like a shock when I ask for something from my current boss, and she is totally reasonable and accommodating to me.
Yep, part of the toxic job hangover 🙁 If you haven't watched it yet, my newest webinar is up on my channel until tomorrow and it deep dives on recovery (therapy is an important piece, but not the full picture for everyone!)
I messed up at my current job and managers could not have been more understanding, supportive, and helpful. I ran to the bathroom and cried because I literally didn’t know what to do with managers and bosses who give a damn. I’m learning that THAT is a trauma response.
I think the most painful thing about working in my toxic workplace (moreso under a toxic boss) is to realize how your admiration for these people died a slow death. I know my boss has been trying to hoover me back, but unfortunately (fortunately) the esteem I had for him will never return. I feel sad just thinking about it because I really looked up to him.
I'm slowly working through my self doubt after leaving my last toxic job. The problem I have going forward is the lingering question, "Are all workplaces toxic?". I am becoming less and less convinced that there are companies that genuinely care about their employees and invest in them. The tide seems to be turning towards toxicity and micro-management, telling employees what/when/where/how to do their job. Do real leaders still exist? Or is micro-managing the rule of law? How do I find a company that treats employees as an asset and not a liability?
Not sure where everyone lives but where I live there is a governing body that makes sure your workplace is not allowing bullying behavior to happen at all. I have made a claim through them and they will investigate my coworkers and managers, both of whom they will find were participating in malicious gossip about me. They have been helpful. Highly recommend getting a third party involved.
Same. I am struggling to move on because I am scared it will happen again. I left but feel sorry for the other staff that feel they are unable to leave. Breaks my heart.
I just left a toxic job, and started a new one. I’m getting feedback on things I’m learning (it’s a creative environment, and aesthetic is huge) and I feel that I’m failing even though I’m learning. It sucks that I have to rebuild my confidence and remind myself that I was hired for a reason.
I worked in a toxic workplace, and I will tell you my story. I worked there for 4 years, and it started off well! The manager was welcoming and always was there if you had any issues, and would happily let you get on with the work, provided you worked hard, that’s fair and understandable. This nice manager, was demoted overnight and a new manager was brought into post 3 weeks later. The new manager started off quite friendly then started being rude, nasty, and pulling people up and shouting at them in public. She micromanaged, and there was a awful fear culture amongst the staff. Staff were threatened to be fired if they spoke out. It was like a workhouse. I complained to the HR department and nobody cared less, and fully stood by her!
I had a boss that was nice to you one 2nd and the next she would stab you in the back like nothing. I work for a medical center for nearly almost 11 years oh, at my recent job I've been working there for three years and those are the toxic managers. Was covid-19 gave us so much more work and their expectations have gone all the roof, they don't give us any time for ourselves we only get 30 minutes of lunch and my crazy boss is always watching my time. So as of this coming Wednesday I will be quitting! And I am happy but also very upset because I've worked there for almost 11 years and to be treated this way
After working multiple jobs and experiencing sooo much drama....i am done working jobs!!! i am a straight A student and even then, it still did not work out for me....starting my own business!!!
The timing of this video couldn’t be any better for me. Glad I’m tuned in for your content and thank you. Starting a new job next week. Feeling a loss of confidence stemming from the toxic environment that led me to an emotional break. This is a detox and taking so much time. This subject needs more airtime and thanks for giving it the attention it deserves.
I'm so sorry for what you've gone through. I know I don't have to explain this to you, but I feel like the conversations around toxic workplaces are superficial - but actual toxic work environment do real harm. Your new job is a great time to reset.. Taking time to consciously consider that the toxic behavior from your old company is not typical. Also that even if you see some of the same things, there is a spectrum; I say this because many of my clients are overly sensitive in their next role (it's a trauma response, your brain will be particularly sensitive to similar behaviors). Also, take time this weekend to write down all the reasons you're awesome and why your skills and experience are an extraordinarily asset to your new company. Don't be shy and don't consider feedback. The first few will be hard to write, but it gets easier. Aim for at least ten but ideally 20. If you get stuck and want some prompts, my direct messages are open on LinkedIn, feel free to ping.
I recovered from a toxic workplace that I left over a year ago. Being threatened and blackmailed by my manager was something I took very personally and it has caused some PTSD, which I have since sought professional help. I went on to launch a complaint for defamation of character and constructive dismissal. After a few months of investigating, my case was dismissed citing sufficient evidence for damages. I have since obtained a job position, but with a small company instead of a corporation. I could proudly say that I am in a better place where workplace toxicity doesn't exist which will help me move forward.
I know how much work you've done to recover, and to make sure your next step was the right step. I'm so glad your new job is going so well! Your future is bright, my friend. I know it!
I had my last day today. And it was toxic as ever during my handover. It affected me and i lost all my confidence. but now i am trying to forget it and look forward. This is a good niche video and helpful tips
I am a manger and I don’t think people talk about the toxic work environment caused by co workers. Drama, gossiping, black mail, stabbing. I have never in my life have experience so much crap. I had a co worker try to black mail me because I was doing my job trying to correct the employees that were participating in drama. Or get hostile when address your concerns about their performance, then blame you.
I was dealing with toxic co workers and management. I finally reached my breaking point yesterday and I finally quit. Now I’m having terrible anxiety at the thought of now having to start a new search.
I just left a toxic work place and actually had two toxic jobs in a row, now I have an actually good job. I’m so used to people being rude and getting mad over everything. So now at the new job, I keep apologizing for any little error and my boss is like, no it’s fine don’t worry! I’m so used to rude people that it’s like a culture shock to have a decent and understanding boss. So now I’m at a stage where I’m unraveling myself to normalize myself, if that makes sense. So I love this video!
I have news for you it's in the medical field...I worked at a major hospital known for its research& was bullied & humiliated in the small department while the doctors looked on & did nothing...recently I just left a pharmacy with 2 psycho pharmacists who constantly blamed me & yelled in front of customers for their mistakes!! So scared to make a move!!
Thank you for sharing this!! I am on my way out of a very toxic work environment. Which on top of a pandemic, political and social unrest was taking a HUGE hit on my mental health. Leaving a job during all of this is risky financially but being there was draining me and making me so miserable. I look forward to the journey of healing. Onward and upward!
I unfortunately have been in a toxic work environment for a few years now. It gets crazy, management changes hands, I get hopeful, but it just seems to get worse not better. There is age discrimination and extreme favortism (I am one of the only staff members that is over the age of 40), management only hires and promotes their equally younger friends with little experience and big heads. I feel unvalued, underappreciated, and my confidence is at an all time low. I am now in an "I should have left years ago" situation, but I feel stuck at the moment. I do have an exit strategy, however, my line of work as a creative is very competitive and there are very few open positions available, and when they do arise there are hundreds of applicants to compete with. I do not want to bring any of the mistrust, baggage, and negativity with me to my next position when I do finally land something better. This video was very helpful in recognizing that being in a toxic work environment can be damaging to your career even after you have moved on. Thank you!
I'm so sorry you're going through this, Yvonne. I hate to be the one to tell you about the impact after you leave, but I wish someone had told me. I was in a toxic workplace and didn't realize the trauma. I've worked with people who have been diagnosed with PTSD after leaving a toxic workplace. But I think knowing to expect an aftermath helps you navigate it. And you are bringing so much to the table for those opportunities.Have you signed up for my workshop? it's tomorrow and it's focusing on uncovering your Unique Awesomeness Quotient (UAQ). I think it would be so helpful for you to have this defined to rebuild your confidence and stand out in your job search.
bro i tell this to all professionals what i follow. which is keep distant from the job. dont get too attached. and you will be better for it. stop caring beyond the work assigned to you and the paycheck. and know to get up and go home every night after 8h. and realize in a 8h day you get maybe 4h of productivity at best when account for all the microbreaks such as snacks, coffee, tea, etc.
I'm giving myself a month to recover trauma from my toxic job place. By reading books, exploring entrepreneurship, and read and do some blogs and do some freelance work here and there. And oh yeah going back to school.
I was promoted as a manger at an all male environment. I had a team of 17 guys. There as a lot of animosity because of my gender and the other male managers would exclude me from meetings. I reported this behavior. Lower wage female workers had reported this behavior too. They were also gaslighted, they left, I left. I filed for disability for PTSD and I got permanent disability for this environment I had to work in. I suffer from agoraphobia and am currently working through my disability of abuse I suffered. Im writing a book right now. I go to therapy often. I can’t work right now and it’s because of this experience until I’m recovered. So sad.
what many employers nowadays do is that they slowly point out condition and they start tightening the rules. and it happens so slowly you will think its normal. my boss was an example who tried to act like a mentor and role model. but within a month of being promoted, the boss hands me a layoff. felt like a real knife in the back. but it was for the best. i know im worth a lot more even in the pandemic era. and i was being vastly underpaid.
@@JenniferBrick what say rings so true? after a while in toxic work environment you start feeling at fault, you defend coworkers, boss,etc. and can't see your true value. its too easy in this sort of environment for yiur hoss to keep you down by giving poor performance review and halt any xhanfe of progression.
I can’t thank you enough for your video. I just got hired with a new company about 5 weeks now and I have been going through so much in those 5 weeks. I would come to work before the sun goes up and worked my butt off but found myself feeling excluded from the other two teammates who have been on the project for almost a year together. I would cry the whole way ride home from work because it was so upsetting and even expressed myself to one of the teammates just to come back for more bullying than the day before. This is my first time dealing with such a toxic work environment. I am going to a new project tomorrow and I’m praying the people that I will get to work with are just kind hearted, genuine and just good human beings. Thank you again for your videos. I have been feeling so drained and exhausted but I feel better now after watching your video 🤓
Thank you. I really needed this. Have been surfering this weekend after I keep getting messages and calls from co workers assigning new stuff to me that's due on Monday. I kept my boundary by not accepting these nonsense works and plan to wait till Monday to respond. But I still suffered during the weekend thinking about how much shit thats been waiting for me on Monday & how my toxic co workers are gonna be like why you not answering my calls. I could barely sleep this weekend and had like no rest at all mentally. So there I am desperately watching videos like this trying to find a way to survive another week with the toxic work environment I sign up for until I am able to find another job.
I’m glad I found this I have work PTSD and someone just brought that back to surface at my new employment. It made me sick, stressed, etc. I said they should never come back. They left but had to train me and it was the weirdest experience ever! I really hope she doesn’t make her way back to our job. I hope she finds success where she’s is going and stay or heck go anywhere else but here. I am still trying to recuperate from this experience!!! I felt like I was in a bad trance it felt unreal because it was that bad!!!
I left a toxic workplace nearly a year ago and Im still not recovered. Physical im doing better. I sleep better, the nightmares getting fewer and I gained all the weight I lost do to the stress. My selfesteme are slowly getting back. But I have a long way to go until I can be my self again. If I ever be. The bullying , discrimination the lack of communication and not knowing what going on even if it affected my work and all the stress this created among many other things that was wrong in this workplace.. All this I can I get past eventuelly My battles right now is to handle the betrayal from the one person I realy trusted and who always treated me nice. He turned against me when I resigned and from that day till my last day he was realy mean to me...every singel day But the worst battle im dealing with right now is my ptsd. I knew my boss was aggressiv and you realy had to tiptoe around him. I comment a thing he did (wrong) to another employee. Tiptoed my words . He exploded before I finished my sentence,,got so angry at me that I realy thought he would hit me. I kept calm and he backed of but never talked to me again For the first time in my life I was thankful for my experience of violent men. The years of experience how to stay calm in aggressiv or life -threating situations.Thankful for my years of trauma-therapy. But yet..here i am with my ptsd triggered again. Terrified of getting another job. Starting over from a place i never thought I be in again .Batteling my common sense whish sayes one thing and a boddy who scream the opposite.
Thank you for this video! For me coming out of a toxic workplace, I also had some difficulties with finding a new job. My self esteem was very low and this was obvious in the job interviews. I lost the ability of selling myself because I thought I wasn’t capable. Luckily I got over that, realizing it isn’t me and that I was doing well at previous companies. Now I have a wonderful new job where I receive so much recognition, wow that feels really good and really helped my self worth.
Thank you so much for this. I have 24 days left at my current toxic work place, and the last day has felt like a week in itself, struggling to get through a day without receiving an aggressive email or message and not having the confidence in myself to feel like I can not take it personally or respond. It makes working until late at night seem great so most people are offline and I can work in silence haha. I am thankful that I have been able to find something else and resign after months of biting the bullet, but I am also terrified about not being able to recover in time to start at the new place. From what I can see this new place is much better, I have asked all the right questions, but of course I thought my current workplace was bliss when I started and was deceiving... Thank you for all of these great recovery tips, it is such a life saver to have access to great info.
I think often times we accept it as not a big deal because when we bring a concern to HR or to our boss, they often invalidate their actions or they dismiss it, as “no big deal.”
Absolutely agree to it. I have used exit strategy because I was already in trauma. It took me sometime to heal and now my work scenario is a blessing. My Ace advice will be to myself and anyone - never ever underplay yourself, you are so worth the appreciation, implying exit strategy is the best strategy because whats the point in keeping a rotten nail.
You just made me realize how much my most recent job screwed with my head. I wasn’t able to understand why I’ve been so reluctant to apply for my next position or why I was having trouble networking for my side business. Seems so obvious, but it wasn’t. I had been feeling so under-qualified and underprepared. So gross and so ready to wash that feeling off. Moving forward, I know where to focus my self work. And I’m in therapy, so I’ll definitely bring this up. The average professional maturity level of that office was in a sandbox. This is so helpful! Thank you!!!
You are a God send! Nursing is hard , toxic co workers are very common! I was told to be fired. Plan: I let them.. I had enough confidence to get my unemployment. So now looking and processing what happened to me. My other plan is once get job pay off tons of debt, save,save, save! And invest. So I can have the privilege of quitting if this hampers my self esteem again.
Wow, this is the video that I didn't even know I needed...I have had an awful experience with my last workplace which I think has affected me more than I will let myself think.
Nope..nope...nope I will not seek therapy....over my ex-boss....no...I will not give her that kind of power.....I am seeking my father Jesus......with that this video is so helpful thank you....
I have just been signed off work for work related stress and I am still in bits! My mental health has taken I huge hit! This video really helped! Thank you!
I was tormented by Managers in an effort push me out so redundancy yes it worked. I have a new job but still struggle with PTSD not many understand how this destroys you. Thank you I dont feel my feelings are me being silly now.
Thank you so much for this ..I just endured 1.5 years of toxic workplace . Im on a leave of absence to deal with the trauma and stop blaming myself before finding another job. The gaslighting was so bad that I've lost myself and confidence but this has helped me a lot.
I have ptsd, extreme anxiety, & trauma from the job I have had for 25 years. There is a union that either can't or won't do anything about management who find the situation as green light to put targeted people they not able to "encourage" to retire or leave previously. I have worked hard to keep my job because of great pay, benefits, vacation. I have been told by Dr that I have PTSD, trauma, anxiety that is unbearable. Definitely discrimination. If you say that word they will fire u on a trumped up fake reason. I feel for everyone going through horrid working conditions that apparently are overall getting worse. If you wonder why people are "quiet quitting", don't rush to judgment.
Thank you so much for this video! I was literally thinking the same thing that you said...you don't want to bring the trauma from your toxic workplace into your new job. I'm really trying to avoid doing that. I also appreciated the last couple of tips about giving yourself a reality check and rebuilding your confidence. My confidence and sense of self-worth decreased drastically from being in a toxic workplace for the past 4 years. Thankfully, I've been able to successfully secure a new job, which itself is a great confidence booster!
I worked for a large bureaucratic organization and the toxicity is systemic and institutional. There was too much competition for promotions and they don’t identify specific criteria needed to get promoted.
Thank you for this analysis! I've been burned at my previous employer so many times... I took some time off and have been working for other employers since then. I still remember though all the toxicity that caused me to take time off with mental sickness 3 times! I also had to take Therapy to help myself to be more positive and to learn self love/care. I'm very careful now on who I want to work for in future and if I notice any signs of toxicity- I'm ready to leave and already made necessary preparations for that possible outcome. My partner had to step in and release me of the "duty" of work, but I still want to do my bit. Good luck to everyone struggling!
I had a traumatic childhood so I'm an expert at navigating toxic environments but workplace... no. When you're financially dependent on them it's so much worse and no matter what you do it's not about you in the end of the day. You need to get out.
Watching this today as I start my new job next week. Damn, I needed this video, so glad it popped up in my recommendations. Thank you Jennifer. I didn't realize having been in a toxic environment for so long had such an impact on me and my mentality. I've been in such a bad department for so long it's made me so cynical and bitter towards how my new job will be and I haven't even started yet!!! That is why I really wish I could have had some downtime in between transitions to destress and mentally prepare, however, that was not an option. I'm going to try and go into my job with a new, optimistic attitude and hope for the best. Thank you~
Hello Jen, thank you for properly addressing this topic! 💖 i just quit my job yesterday. It took me a lot of time and guts to admit that I'm struggling mentally and physically because of them. When i told this to my manager, she told me I'm being so selfish to quit. Wow. I have been shamed verbally and emotionally abused in that workplace which has left me stripped completely of my self esteem and confidence 🥲
There is not a sufficient amount of discussion about recovering from a toxic workplace; it is truly trauma and we need to take it seriously. I'm glad I was able to open up a space for people who have felt a toxic workplace to start healing 💜
I put up with a toxic work place for 18 years and didn't realize until about 10 years ago but I stuck with it until a week ago. My boss had sold the place and we were under new owners and it got that bad I couldn't take anymore and I quit. My partner and I are buying a house so I need a job but after experiencing this toxic work place I'm scared to go back to work but I need to. After listening to what you said I just need time to get over what I went through and get my confidence back. Thank you for pointing this out. :)
I just want to get out so bad and I wanted and prayed for this job and I thought I finally had it. They pulled a bait and switch. They told me I was suppose to do one job and switched it for me to be a glorified secretary and that’s putting it nicely
Been watching your videos for years, Jennifer. They've always been a major help from someone with severe ADD and who had a late start in life. I'm grateful your videos have helped to foster a learning perspective on even the worst situations I have encountered in the workforce. God bless and here's hoping for more of your insight 🙏
I have also being part of such a workplace where they always talked shit about my college and it got crazy &l couldn't do it anymore l felt in the middle of the week prior to exam week
The remark about when you think you're over the toxic work place and something triggers it, I am so feeling that right now. I just need to power through this event, get back into therapy (had to cancel because I could no longer do it in person after returning back to the office), and acknowledge that I have more power than I believe and to ask for help when things start to overwhelm me. My boss and Dean have told me repeatedly I'm doing a good job, but that triggering event really shook me and I'm trying to believe that they're being honest about it.
I have a picture of the inside of my car's engine that I look at when I'm questioning my confidence. I had an engine die, the replacement then blew a head gasket, I worked 30 miles away and figured out how to make it to work by bicycle for 2 months while learning how to replace head gaskets on the weekends. Nothing boosts your confidence like overcoming that kind of obstacle.
Thank you for mentioning the personality disorder issue! Two weeks in and a coworker casually mentioned that he suspected the boss to be schizophrenic. Since that day the pieces started fall in the right place and I saw more and more toxic and even dangerous behaviours like demeaning and gaslighting, swearing, fraud,... I left without notice one evening and couldn't even find the courage to bring back my badge. They didn't pay my Christmas Day which was the day after and so legally required to be payed.
I’ve been retired for a year now, and I’m still having stress from working in a school district in California for 20 years. Being a guy is hard in the district. My last boss was a female school principal that hated men and would just talk to me really mean when no one was around. I filed a complaint with upper management and HR, and no one would listen to me, they kept shuffling me around. I was told that I needed to be very careful because she was a girl, and I would be on the losing end if it ever came down to my word against hers. It’s been 15 months since I’ve retired, and I’m still struggling to get over the stress.
Hey great video! I like your channel a lot. I'm in an environment now where I feel slightly depressed and anxious (to varying levels) the majority of the time. I had a job mess with me years ago in the same way. All the way back in 2005. I remember waking up feeling like crap on Saturdays. That's when you know its time to go.
I worked for a university in the UK in the electrical department's. I was destroyed over 8 years by a toxic working environment. Other peoples tramping ambition I never recovered. I was too badly damaged. That was 20 years ago!
Here from future Jennifer's link on my quitting day, processing my just over 3mos in a toxic company. Last night I figured I was financially positioned where i could quit this morning and wait for my new job to do all the redtape stuff. What I didn't expect was getting a little emotional telling my direct manager that I was leaving, mostly because of the other manager. For about two hours after leaving, I felt emotionally depleted, not sure I've never felt like that. I had planned the rest of my freedom day to go explore and had moments of giddiness, because I escaped. I know I need to take time to process it all, even with just the short time I was there,
Hi Jennifer just came across this. And I am going thru it now. Trying to get back into therapy to start getting everything in perspective. I had closure with my boss and of course they always make it seem like it your fault. You didnt take the OT when it was given she said. I told her the company messed me over. And other things that were going on. She didnt NEVER acknowledge anything. Lots of politics and biases there. They dont care how they make ppl feel. Im glad i left. But now I am working on letting go. And not holding on to any messed up stuff in the place. I thought of taking some time off before I start my new job to clear my head but not sure if i can. I probably will tho. Thanks.
I'm on my way out of a toxic workplace. My last day is in 2 days and I'm glad to be leaving but definitely have scars. I'm worried that the new job is going to be toxic as well but I don't want to think like that. I know I'm an awesome person and an awesome coworker once you get to know me. I'm using this video to reboost my confidence.
I went through an extremely toxic relationship with a boss that has impacted me to this day, and that's that I own my own company now. It takes a TON of effort and work to heal through this. Thank you for sharing this.
I’m in a toxic job now and it’s horrible. I feel like leaving it so bad but I don’t have anything else lined up. I feel so anxious every single day. It’s just gets worse and worse. I am so scared of getting a new job as well. I dream of work every single day. It’s awful
I used to be a very quiet and passive person at work. I haven't been able to work for 6 years due to working in a toxic working environment for 18 years. It has made me an extremely volatile person, who lacks patience and empathy. If I went back to work and my boss upset me, I wouldn't hesitate to knock them out cold and walk out.
Been almost a year in therapy since I quit and am still working thru trauma. Currently on Step 4..and all I can think of is watching that cursed building burn to the ground
I guess my end goal is just to get a position where I will be able to come and go from a toxic work environment on my own terms. That either means climbing the ladder and trying to get a supervisor position where I have little to no dealings with others telling me what to do, or get a job where I am working from home or start my own side hustle that eventually turns into a full blown business. In this day in age I’ve just come to learn that it’s going to be near impossible to find a toxic-free work environment. I just need to work on bettering myself so I can have more options open for getting away from the BS.
Face it out leave..but dont leave to hurly otherwise you gonna have a hard Time to recover. Go all thé way ...and dont bé ashamed for what péople do to you.
Have you recovered from a toxic workplace? What strategies helped you?
Lifting others helped me lift myself. Got this idea from Booker T Washington.
finding a new job. of course, this takes a few months of soul search - what went wrong, what can i do better to see the red flags next time, what have i learned so i don't carry these toxic traits onto other places. also setting expectations that the new job might just be a place to chill before you go full throttle again at another place, and that's ok.
Never give 100 percent at job. Perform only what you are paid for. Being too good doesn’t gain any rewards. Only gets dumped with more work that is just abuse because they’d say “you are there and you showed up”. They’d slack of and won’t have initiative if someone can do it all.
Uh, I have never recovered technically and one must expect and or pray for the worse and hope for the best.
Seeing things for what they are. A toxic work environment is a toxic environment. It doesn't say anything about me, my capabilities, and my future. A lot of people do not know that they are "toxic" because of different worldviews and experiences. Remembering that we can choose to deal with it or to leave and find a better workplace to grow.
I’m honestly terrified of getting another job and I fear I’ll deal with this again. It is such a horrible experience and I worked so hard and made so many excuses for the toxicity. I research all of the places I’m going to apply too and I just fear they all will be the same.
It gets better. After I left my toxic job, all the ones after have been way better.
@@cupcakelady6000 That’s awesome!!💕
I assure you no Work Place is the same, respect your observation major league and there are some bad people out there (not all). You Can Do It and make it happen.
If you’re unlucky like me it seems to repeat itself until we stop running away and learn to deal with it. Those people should not have power over us compassionate sensitive souls this isn’t their world.
@@tolulawson4680 , yeah , good people we are should support each other against those bullies.
1. Acknowledge
2. Be Kind Yourself
3. Stop Blaming Yourself
4. Process the Hurt e.g. therapy, yoga and meditation
5. Reality Check e.g. you are worthy
6. Rebuild your confidence e.g. its going to come up sometimes, implement confidence boosters
I didn't have self-blaming, but toxic workplaces really ruined my self-esteem. It took 4 years to recover.
yeah 4 years?, took one night and a 12-pack of Budweiser. Next morning, moving a little slow but Good To Go.
I hear you. 4 years for me as well. 3 years of counseling and medication.
@@HighSpeedNoDrag so it was a typical Wednesday night. You've never been in a toxic environment in your life. You have no idea how coworkers and particularly bosses can undermine your career and social life. I live in a small village my bosses were from the same village. They spread lies to keep me a subordinate. Now I can't get a job within 30 miles. I now have to drive 40 minutes to work. Can't get a date with a girl within 30 miles either. Some people WILL destroy your life if you don't be an all encompassing compliant beech regardless of ethics.
@@scottfeuerhammer3595 Calm down dude and I have been in Toxic Chernoblyl type environment(s) for the last 25 years plus. I believe you regarding your hardships and the offenders can be very dangerous and Never Underestimate any of them. It's almost like we need the Target's Hand Book to being a target and how to roll but of course it's not issued to us. Lastly, it's better to date a woman well outside your A.O. and good luck.
Agreed …. Me too
Wow. I needed this. I have PTSD from my previous job/ toxic boss....it’s really been a struggle. Thank you!
Sending so many positive healing vibes 💜
I have it too ... it is aweful
Same! Amen! I'm glad I'm not the only one
I just love how PTSD is used so loosely here. Lol. You dont have PTSD. Unless you're fresh back from the battlefield, you do not suffer from it. You had a bad experience. Suck it up and move along.
@@swing2gether wow didn’t know you could self diagnose people 🤯
I have found, after 18 years in a toxic work environment, I left and BECAME MY OWN BOSS!!
Wow. That's great! You are doing what I dream of doing.
That is the best way I believe otherwise there is the fear that one will repeat the cycle moving from one job to the other
@@lindagithaiga1974
Believe me I periodically have nightmares. And I get angry sometimes.
Me too.
It's PTSD!
This conversation is so important. We downplay what happens in work environments all the time. I ended up developing a form of PTSD from a bad boss, and didn't realize it until years later. I had been refusing to acknowledge what I experienced as trauma, which prevented me from processing and moving on.
I'm glad you were able to identify it. How are you doing now, Gibby?
Honestly, I find so much of the conversation about toxic workplace fluffy. It's fine if you are dealing with a bad boss or company that isn't a fit - but a toxic work environment is corrosive and it does result in trauma at a range of levels.
Thank you for sharing your story here, someone is going to read it and get help because of it 💜
A bad job is not traumatic, nor do they cause PTSD.
People usually say “it happens everywhere-“ no it doesn’t happen everywhere. I have survived places that have used my trauma against me and it really hurt especially after they claimed to be my “family.” And I really needed that. Another thing that happened was that I was held back because of how slow I was I couldn’t compete with others and that’s something that I don’t blame myself for anymore. It’s still hard to stand up for myself and what I need because I’m used to just letting people use me. I don’t know how to negotiate what I need especially when I know they need something from me that I won’t be able to give it to them. And sometimes I just need an open person who cares enough to hear that and let it be. I just left a bad place to work and got hired at another place that I think is nicer- and am honestly dreading it because I didn’t have time for myself, I’ve gone through a lot in the past year and would just like to have a vacation. But we all need money, and the pressure gets high sometimes. Should have picked something more simple and less complicated. Oh well.
@Chad Kollmann then you have not been in a toxic work environment.
@@999timepass I live in a world where my mind isn't weak enough to claim PTSD over a job. Let alone commit suicide over it. Yall have too many fake feelings. Consequences of growing up in the "Participation Trophy" Era. Welcome to the real world.
Currently healing. It's been 2 months. Sleeping alot. Isolation and depressed. Sadly don't wanna get back out into the world. I rather work from home.
A supportive therapist helps. I worked in two consecutive toxic workplaces and still replay abusive encounters and scenarios in my head. It's hard to fully shake it, even years later.
True. But it makes you a better person to recognize it.
I have PTSD for a toxic boss I had over 2 years ago even after leaving the job.
Add to it that family members who don't understand, expect you to be normal and blame you, labeling you as the problem.
True. Its because they cant believe an employer would let it happen.
Hit the nail on the head, my mom would say I am too judgmental or ungrateful, she only worked 7 years in her whole life & then brag to me how she gets along with everyone so well. I would love to put her in my work environment & see how well she would do.
Exactly!!! So easy for people to judge if the have not experienced a toxic work place.
Facts! People in the community believe I’m the problem. That manager was so cunning. I hate it. But knowing God is my source I had to learn to let it be.
I worked for a toxic company for 12 years and it affected me for the next 16 years after that, i’m still jaded about how I’ve been treated throughout my career
I totally agree with you. I started a new job 2 weeks ago and it was a very toxic working environment. The staff were rude, gossiping about each other, manager not trusting staff. Imagine on my first day the staff were gossiping to me about other colleagues. I informed my manager about some personal issues I had at home . One of my colleagues mentioned it to me by accident. I was shocked she found out. That’s soo unprofessional. I literally walked out on my lunch break and didn’t return. How can a manager be soo toxic and discuss my business with other colleagues. This work place gave me such bad anxiety there was no team at all. I’m soo happy I got out sooner than later.
I'm glad you escaped quickly, Kisha!
You were wise!!👏🏽
Brooo I had the same experience, it’s been like 2 weeks now but I had this lumber job with a very toxic workplace. So I left, I did not feel comfortable with the job and it was toxic. The worst part is that my friends are almost shaming me, I almost don’t wanna talk to them anymore because they say it’s all my fault
@@mickraymond8824 Sorry to hear that Mike. Don't let them get you down, who feels it knows it.. They can only comment and disagree with you're decision but their not the ones going through it, you are. Anxiety and stress is not good for your health. You deserve better. Just do any job to keep some money coming in. Just for future reference dont tell your friends everything. Friends and family can be our biggest critics and they play a big part in our mental health declining at times. ❤
@@kishageorge7788 I’ll try that next time :) it’s been tough but that’s how life be, I hope you have good luck on your next job or current❤️
I left my job a month ago. I’ve been battling with the trauma from my toxic work environment. I’ve worked there for 2 and a half years. I wanted to leave. However, I stayed because I felt that financially supporting my daughter was important. During my last month there, my mental and physical health was deteriorating. I was having panic attacks. My boss and three coworkers were constantly gaslighting and undermining my work. I’m still healing. But I’m glad that I left that place behind.
It’s worth mentioning why the toxic workplace exists. They are simply leveraging the power they have over you by providing your living money. If you lose that fear, they lose a lot of their ability to mess with you.... easier said than done. I hope all recover that need it
I actually started tear up watching this. Damnit
You'll get through this, Jeremy 💜
I did too
This video is perfect!!!
I had a horrible work experience. I just quit my job last week. I was working as a waitress and I dealt with rude customers and coworkers.
My manager was rude to me and everyone in the kitchen. She would yell at me for every little thing.
Another coworker called me fat. My name is Jessica and there was another waitress with the same name as me. One of the cooks in the kitchen said to me “I’m gonna call you fat Jessica so I don’t get you and the other Jessica confused”.
That was my last day working there.
Can’t wait to recover from working this shitty place ✌🏻
I'm so glad you escaped!
@@JenniferBrick Transitioned and You Can Do It!
holy hell
I had a similar work place experience my co workers were all like that as well even after I left I still got harassed online too it was really bad
Bruh wtf good thing you left
There is one job that really broke me and my confidence. I don't think bosses realize what an impact they have on employees when they treat the employee so poorly. It has been 2 years since I have gotten out of that horrific job. I was lucky that I was able to take a few months off and lived off of savings. I focused on art, music and things I really enjoyed and was good at. My confidence slowly started to come back these days I am working for the family business and thriving. There is life and hope after a traumatic and toxic work environment.
Why do these videos have such low views! These are gold! Please don't get discouraged, Jennifer - this channel will blow up one day
I left a toxic workplace (worked there for five years) over three years ago and I still have leftover coping mechanisms from that experience. My therapist said that I was constantly looking for a fight with my current boss because I had to do that at my old job. It still feels like a shock when I ask for something from my current boss, and she is totally reasonable and accommodating to me.
Yep, part of the toxic job hangover 🙁
If you haven't watched it yet, my newest webinar is up on my channel until tomorrow and it deep dives on recovery (therapy is an important piece, but not the full picture for everyone!)
I messed up at my current job and managers could not have been more understanding, supportive, and helpful. I ran to the bathroom and cried because I literally didn’t know what to do with managers and bosses who give a damn.
I’m learning that THAT is a trauma response.
I think the most painful thing about working in my toxic workplace (moreso under a toxic boss) is to realize how your admiration for these people died a slow death. I know my boss has been trying to hoover me back, but unfortunately (fortunately) the esteem I had for him will never return. I feel sad just thinking about it because I really looked up to him.
Thank you for this video! After leaving a toxic work environment it left me with low self esteem and nearly loosing my faith.
I'm sorry you went through that Natalie; know you're not alone, but there are so many great companies and positive opportunities ahead for you.
I'm slowly working through my self doubt after leaving my last toxic job. The problem I have going forward is the lingering question, "Are all workplaces toxic?". I am becoming less and less convinced that there are companies that genuinely care about their employees and invest in them. The tide seems to be turning towards toxicity and micro-management, telling employees what/when/where/how to do their job. Do real leaders still exist? Or is micro-managing the rule of law? How do I find a company that treats employees as an asset and not a liability?
Not sure where everyone lives but where I live there is a governing body that makes sure your workplace is not allowing bullying behavior to happen at all. I have made a claim through them and they will investigate my coworkers and managers, both of whom they will find were participating in malicious gossip about me. They have been helpful. Highly recommend getting a third party involved.
Same. I am struggling to move on because I am scared it will happen again. I left but feel sorry for the other staff that feel they are unable to leave. Breaks my heart.
I just left a toxic job, and started a new one. I’m getting feedback on things I’m learning (it’s a creative environment, and aesthetic is huge) and I feel that I’m failing even though I’m learning. It sucks that I have to rebuild my confidence and remind myself that I was hired for a reason.
I worked in a toxic workplace, and I will tell you my story. I worked there for 4 years, and it started off well! The manager was welcoming and always was there if you had any issues, and would happily let you get on with the work, provided you worked hard, that’s fair and understandable. This nice manager, was demoted overnight and a new manager was brought into post 3 weeks later. The new manager started off quite friendly then started being rude, nasty, and pulling people up and shouting at them in public. She micromanaged, and there was a awful fear culture amongst the staff. Staff were threatened to be fired if they spoke out. It was like a workhouse. I complained to the HR department and nobody cared less, and fully stood by her!
I'm so sorry you went through that.
@@JenniferBrick Even to this day I feel rather annoyed
HR always sides with the badly-behaved person.
Jennifer… I was just let go last week from a toxic work environment.
In my 33 years in logistics, I have never been treated so horribly.
I had a boss that was nice to you one 2nd and the next she would stab you in the back like nothing. I work for a medical center for nearly almost 11 years oh, at my recent job I've been working there for three years and those are the toxic managers. Was covid-19 gave us so much more work and their expectations have gone all the roof, they don't give us any time for ourselves we only get 30 minutes of lunch and my crazy boss is always watching my time. So as of this coming Wednesday I will be quitting! And I am happy but also very upset because I've worked there for almost 11 years and to be treated this way
It's so hard, it's like a breakup when you do exit. Feel those feels, and know there is light on the other side.
I'm a nurse and it's the same for us
Nsg is the worst. Could be a whole video.
After working multiple jobs and experiencing sooo much drama....i am done working jobs!!! i am a straight A student and even then, it still did not work out for me....starting my own business!!!
The timing of this video couldn’t be any better for me. Glad I’m tuned in for your content and thank you. Starting a new job next week. Feeling a loss of confidence stemming from the toxic environment that led me to an emotional break. This is a detox and taking so much time. This subject needs more airtime and thanks for giving it the attention it deserves.
I'm so sorry for what you've gone through. I know I don't have to explain this to you, but I feel like the conversations around toxic workplaces are superficial - but actual toxic work environment do real harm.
Your new job is a great time to reset.. Taking time to consciously consider that the toxic behavior from your old company is not typical. Also that even if you see some of the same things, there is a spectrum; I say this because many of my clients are overly sensitive in their next role (it's a trauma response, your brain will be particularly sensitive to similar behaviors).
Also, take time this weekend to write down all the reasons you're awesome and why your skills and experience are an extraordinarily asset to your new company. Don't be shy and don't consider feedback. The first few will be hard to write, but it gets easier. Aim for at least ten but ideally 20. If you get stuck and want some prompts, my direct messages are open on LinkedIn, feel free to ping.
I recovered from a toxic workplace that I left over a year ago. Being threatened and blackmailed by my manager was something I took very personally and it has caused some PTSD, which I have since sought professional help. I went on to launch a complaint for defamation of character and constructive dismissal. After a few months of investigating, my case was dismissed citing sufficient evidence for damages. I have since obtained a job position, but with a small company instead of a corporation. I could proudly say that I am in a better place where workplace toxicity doesn't exist which will help me move forward.
I know how much work you've done to recover, and to make sure your next step was the right step. I'm so glad your new job is going so well! Your future is bright, my friend. I know it!
I had my last day today. And it was toxic as ever during my handover. It affected me and i lost all my confidence. but now i am trying to forget it and look forward. This is a good niche video and helpful tips
Focus on rebuilding your confidence friend. You can recover from this.
@@JenniferBrick Stay Positive and Maintain a positive attitude that generates Positive Isotopes.
I am a manger and I don’t think people talk about the toxic work environment caused by co workers. Drama, gossiping, black mail, stabbing. I have never in my life have experience so much crap. I had a co worker try to black mail me because I was doing my job trying to correct the employees that were participating in drama. Or get hostile when address your concerns about their performance, then blame you.
I was dealing with toxic co workers and management. I finally reached my breaking point yesterday and I finally quit. Now I’m having terrible anxiety at the thought of now having to start a new search.
I just left a toxic work place and actually had two toxic jobs in a row, now I have an actually good job. I’m so used to people being rude and getting mad over everything. So now at the new job, I keep apologizing for any little error and my boss is like, no it’s fine don’t worry! I’m so used to rude people that it’s like a culture shock to have a decent and understanding boss.
So now I’m at a stage where I’m unraveling myself to normalize myself, if that makes sense. So I love this video!
Can I just say, most of the jobs I've had are toxic. I need to get out of retail because I know I'm better than the way they treat me and others.
I have news for you it's in the medical field...I worked at a major hospital known for its research& was bullied & humiliated in the small department while the doctors looked on & did nothing...recently I just left a pharmacy with 2 psycho pharmacists who constantly blamed me & yelled in front of customers for their mistakes!! So scared to make a move!!
It's especially bad in govt. jobs
Thank you for sharing this!! I am on my way out of a very toxic work environment. Which on top of a pandemic, political and social unrest was taking a HUGE hit on my mental health. Leaving a job during all of this is risky financially but being there was draining me and making me so miserable. I look forward to the journey of healing. Onward and upward!
I unfortunately have been in a toxic work environment for a few years now. It gets crazy, management changes hands, I get hopeful, but it just seems to get worse not better. There is age discrimination and extreme favortism (I am one of the only staff members that is over the age of 40), management only hires and promotes their equally younger friends with little experience and big heads. I feel unvalued, underappreciated, and my confidence is at an all time low. I am now in an "I should have left years ago" situation, but I feel stuck at the moment. I do have an exit strategy, however, my line of work as a creative is very competitive and there are very few open positions available, and when they do arise there are hundreds of applicants to compete with. I do not want to bring any of the mistrust, baggage, and negativity with me to my next position when I do finally land something better. This video was very helpful in recognizing that being in a toxic work environment can be damaging to your career even after you have moved on. Thank you!
I'm so sorry you're going through this, Yvonne. I hate to be the one to tell you about the impact after you leave, but I wish someone had told me. I was in a toxic workplace and didn't realize the trauma. I've worked with people who have been diagnosed with PTSD after leaving a toxic workplace. But I think knowing to expect an aftermath helps you navigate it.
And you are bringing so much to the table for those opportunities.Have you signed up for my workshop? it's tomorrow and it's focusing on uncovering your Unique Awesomeness Quotient (UAQ). I think it would be so helpful for you to have this defined to rebuild your confidence and stand out in your job search.
bro i tell this to all professionals what i follow. which is keep distant from the job. dont get too attached. and you will be better for it. stop caring beyond the work assigned to you and the paycheck. and know to get up and go home every night after 8h. and realize in a 8h day you get maybe 4h of productivity at best when account for all the microbreaks such as snacks, coffee, tea, etc.
@@asadb1990 👍
I’ve had the opposite from being young and femaike
Age discrimination is very real. I bit the bullet and handed in my resignation. Had to take control of a soul destroying situation.
Thank you! I worked for a company that pushed Scientology and micromanaged everyone.
Woah what?! I sense a story here!
Did you work for Tom Cruise? 🤣
@@sarahpoindexter5718 Hahaha!
I'm ok with Scientology but not with micro-managing. Curious that a company would utilize religion, did you work in a church?
I'm giving myself a month to recover trauma from my toxic job place. By reading books, exploring entrepreneurship, and read and do some blogs and do some freelance work here and there. And oh yeah going back to school.
Thank you for reaffirming the exact same thing I want to do to get some confidence & peace of mind back!!
Suffered PTSD from 3 toxic workplaces and bosses ,underwent therapy.In better place now. ☺️
I'm in a new job but I'm dealing with trauma of my old job.
I hear you bro!
I did loose my sense of worthiness.🥺😰 And I was the team lead!
I was promoted as a manger at an all male environment. I had a team of 17 guys. There as a lot of animosity because of my gender and the other male managers would exclude me from meetings. I reported this behavior. Lower wage female workers had reported this behavior too. They were also gaslighted, they left, I left. I filed for disability for PTSD and I got permanent disability for this environment I had to work in. I suffer from agoraphobia and am currently working through my disability of abuse I suffered. Im writing a book right now. I go to therapy often. I can’t work right now and it’s because of this experience until I’m recovered. So sad.
what many employers nowadays do is that they slowly point out condition and they start tightening the rules. and it happens so slowly you will think its normal. my boss was an example who tried to act like a mentor and role model. but within a month of being promoted, the boss hands me a layoff. felt like a real knife in the back. but it was for the best. i know im worth a lot more even in the pandemic era. and i was being vastly underpaid.
My friend, I'm so glad you know your value and that you deserve so much better than how your toxic manager treated you.
@@JenniferBrick what say rings so true? after a while in toxic work environment you start feeling at fault, you defend coworkers, boss,etc. and can't see your true value. its too easy in this sort of environment for yiur hoss to keep you down by giving poor performance review and halt any xhanfe of progression.
I can’t thank you enough for your video. I just got hired with a new company about 5 weeks now and I have been going through so much in those 5 weeks. I would come to work before the sun goes up and worked my butt off but found myself feeling excluded from the other two teammates who have been on the project for almost a year together. I would cry the whole way ride home from work because it was so upsetting and even expressed myself to one of the teammates just to come back for more bullying than the day before. This is my first time dealing with such a toxic work environment. I am going to a new project tomorrow and I’m praying the people that I will get to work with are just kind hearted, genuine and just good human beings. Thank you again for your videos. I have been feeling so drained and exhausted but I feel better now after watching your video 🤓
Thank you. I really needed this. Have been surfering this weekend after I keep getting messages and calls from co workers assigning new stuff to me that's due on Monday. I kept my boundary by not accepting these nonsense works and plan to wait till Monday to respond. But I still suffered during the weekend thinking about how much shit thats been waiting for me on Monday & how my toxic co workers are gonna be like why you not answering my calls. I could barely sleep this weekend and had like no rest at all mentally. So there I am desperately watching videos like this trying to find a way to survive another week with the toxic work environment I sign up for until I am able to find another job.
I’m glad I found this I have work PTSD and someone just brought that back to surface at my new employment. It made me sick, stressed, etc. I said they should never come back. They left but had to train me and it was the weirdest experience ever! I really hope she doesn’t make her way back to our job. I hope she finds success where she’s is going and stay or heck go anywhere else but here. I am still trying to recuperate from this experience!!! I felt like I was in a bad trance it felt unreal because it was that bad!!!
This helped tremendously! I have blamed myself for so much of what happened with a toxic company and boss. Thank you for this video!!
I left a toxic workplace nearly a year ago and Im still not recovered. Physical im doing better. I sleep better, the nightmares getting fewer and I gained all the weight I lost do to the stress. My selfesteme are slowly getting back. But I have a long way to go until I can be my self again. If I ever be. The bullying , discrimination the lack of communication and not knowing what going on even if it affected my work and all the stress this created among many other things that was wrong in this workplace.. All this I can I get past eventuelly My battles right now is to handle the betrayal from the one person I realy trusted and who always treated me nice. He turned against me when I resigned and from that day till my last day he was realy mean to me...every singel day But the worst battle im dealing with right now is my ptsd. I knew my boss was aggressiv and you realy had to tiptoe around him. I comment a thing he did (wrong) to another employee. Tiptoed my words . He exploded before I finished my sentence,,got so angry at me that I realy thought he would hit me. I kept calm and he backed of but never talked to me again For the first time in my life I was thankful for my experience of violent men. The years of experience how to stay calm in aggressiv or life -threating situations.Thankful for my years of trauma-therapy. But yet..here i am with my ptsd triggered again. Terrified of getting another job. Starting over from a place i never thought I be in again .Batteling my common sense whish sayes one thing and a boddy who scream the opposite.
Thank you for this video! For me coming out of a toxic workplace, I also had some difficulties with finding a new job. My self esteem was very low and this was obvious in the job interviews. I lost the ability of selling myself because I thought I wasn’t capable. Luckily I got over that, realizing it isn’t me and that I was doing well at previous companies. Now I have a wonderful new job where I receive so much recognition, wow that feels really good and really helped my self worth.
Thank you so much for this. I have 24 days left at my current toxic work place, and the last day has felt like a week in itself, struggling to get through a day without receiving an aggressive email or message and not having the confidence in myself to feel like I can not take it personally or respond. It makes working until late at night seem great so most people are offline and I can work in silence haha.
I am thankful that I have been able to find something else and resign after months of biting the bullet, but I am also terrified about not being able to recover in time to start at the new place. From what I can see this new place is much better, I have asked all the right questions, but of course I thought my current workplace was bliss when I started and was deceiving...
Thank you for all of these great recovery tips, it is such a life saver to have access to great info.
I think often times we accept it as not a big deal because when we bring a concern to HR or to our boss, they often invalidate their actions or they dismiss it, as “no big deal.”
Absolutely agree to it. I have used exit strategy because I was already in trauma. It took me sometime to heal and now my work scenario is a blessing. My Ace advice will be to myself and anyone - never ever underplay yourself, you are so worth the appreciation, implying exit strategy is the best strategy because whats the point in keeping a rotten nail.
You just made me realize how much my most recent job screwed with my head. I wasn’t able to understand why I’ve been so reluctant to apply for my next position or why I was having trouble networking for my side business. Seems so obvious, but it wasn’t. I had been feeling so under-qualified and underprepared. So gross and so ready to wash that feeling off. Moving forward, I know where to focus my self work. And I’m in therapy, so I’ll definitely bring this up. The average professional maturity level of that office was in a sandbox. This is so helpful! Thank you!!!
You are a God send! Nursing is hard , toxic co workers are very common! I was told to be fired. Plan: I let them.. I had enough confidence to get my unemployment. So now looking and processing what happened to me. My other plan is once get job pay off tons of debt, save,save, save! And invest. So I can have the privilege of quitting if this hampers my self esteem again.
Having money in the bank and lower cost of living (not spending alot) let's you give the middle finger to ANY company
Wow, this is the video that I didn't even know I needed...I have had an awful experience with my last workplace which I think has affected me more than I will let myself think.
3 min in-- and I really, REALLY needed to hear this. 😭 Thank you so much.. 🙏🏼
You're gonna get through this friend 💜✨
Nope..nope...nope I will not seek therapy....over my ex-boss....no...I will not give her that kind of power.....I am seeking my father Jesus......with that this video is so helpful thank you....
I have just been signed off work for work related stress and I am still in bits! My mental health has taken I huge hit! This video really helped! Thank you!
Thank you so much. I was BADLY harassed after my mom passed last year. They laid me off last week after one coworker yelled in my face. ❤thank u
Respected Jennifer Madam,you are a kind human with humane healing counselling touch almost angelic. Thank you. 🙏
I was tormented by Managers in an effort push me out so redundancy yes it worked. I have a new job but still struggle with PTSD not many understand how this destroys you. Thank you I dont feel my feelings are me being silly now.
Thank you so much for this ..I just endured 1.5 years of toxic workplace . Im on a leave of absence to deal with the trauma and stop blaming myself before finding another job. The gaslighting was so bad that I've lost myself and confidence but this has helped me a lot.
I have ptsd, extreme anxiety, & trauma from the job I have had for 25 years.
There is a union that either can't or won't do anything about management who find the situation as green light to put targeted people they not able to "encourage" to retire or leave previously. I have worked hard to keep my job because of great pay, benefits, vacation. I have been told by Dr that I have PTSD, trauma, anxiety that is unbearable.
Definitely discrimination. If you say that word they will fire u on a trumped up fake reason.
I feel for everyone going through horrid working conditions that apparently are overall getting worse.
If you wonder why people are "quiet quitting", don't rush to judgment.
I'm escaping this month 💪
Thank you so much for this video! I was literally thinking the same thing that you said...you don't want to bring the trauma from your toxic workplace into your new job. I'm really trying to avoid doing that. I also appreciated the last couple of tips about giving yourself a reality check and rebuilding your confidence. My confidence and sense of self-worth decreased drastically from being in a toxic workplace for the past 4 years. Thankfully, I've been able to successfully secure a new job, which itself is a great confidence booster!
I worked for a large bureaucratic organization and the toxicity is systemic and institutional. There was too much competition for promotions and they don’t identify specific criteria needed to get promoted.
Thank you for this analysis! I've been burned at my previous employer so many times... I took some time off and have been working for other employers since then. I still remember though all the toxicity that caused me to take time off with mental sickness 3 times! I also had to take Therapy to help myself to be more positive and to learn self love/care. I'm very careful now on who I want to work for in future and if I notice any signs of toxicity- I'm ready to leave and already made necessary preparations for that possible outcome. My partner had to step in and release me of the "duty" of work, but I still want to do my bit. Good luck to everyone struggling!
I had a traumatic childhood so I'm an expert at navigating toxic environments but workplace... no. When you're financially dependent on them it's so much worse and no matter what you do it's not about you in the end of the day. You need to get out.
Watching this today as I start my new job next week. Damn, I needed this video, so glad it popped up in my recommendations. Thank you Jennifer.
I didn't realize having been in a toxic environment for so long had such an impact on me and my mentality.
I've been in such a bad department for so long it's made me so cynical and bitter towards how my new job will be and I haven't even started yet!!! That is why I really wish I could have had some downtime in between transitions to destress and mentally prepare, however, that was not an option.
I'm going to try and go into my job with a new, optimistic attitude and hope for the best. Thank you~
Hello Jen, thank you for properly addressing this topic! 💖 i just quit my job yesterday. It took me a lot of time and guts to admit that I'm struggling mentally and physically because of them. When i told this to my manager, she told me I'm being so selfish to quit. Wow. I have been shamed verbally and emotionally abused in that workplace which has left me stripped completely of my self esteem and confidence 🥲
Thanks for a great video and treating this topic seriously.
There is not a sufficient amount of discussion about recovering from a toxic workplace; it is truly trauma and we need to take it seriously. I'm glad I was able to open up a space for people who have felt a toxic workplace to start healing 💜
Didn’t realize I’m suffering from PTSD. It’s caused me so much self doubt!! Thank you for this video!
I put up with a toxic work place for 18 years and didn't realize until about 10 years ago but I stuck with it until a week ago. My boss had sold the place and we were under new owners and it got that bad I couldn't take anymore and I quit. My partner and I are buying a house so I need a job but after experiencing this toxic work place I'm scared to go back to work but I need to. After listening to what you said I just need time to get over what I went through and get my confidence back. Thank you for pointing this out. :)
I just want to get out so bad and I wanted and prayed for this job and I thought I finally had it. They pulled a bait and switch. They told me I was suppose to do one job and switched it for me to be a glorified secretary and that’s putting it nicely
Been watching your videos for years, Jennifer. They've always been a major help from someone with severe ADD and who had a late start in life. I'm grateful your videos have helped to foster a learning perspective on even the worst situations I have encountered in the workforce. God bless and here's hoping for more of your insight 🙏
I have also being part of such a workplace where they always talked shit about my college and it got crazy &l couldn't do it anymore l felt in the middle of the week prior to exam week
The remark about when you think you're over the toxic work place and something triggers it, I am so feeling that right now. I just need to power through this event, get back into therapy (had to cancel because I could no longer do it in person after returning back to the office), and acknowledge that I have more power than I believe and to ask for help when things start to overwhelm me. My boss and Dean have told me repeatedly I'm doing a good job, but that triggering event really shook me and I'm trying to believe that they're being honest about it.
I have a picture of the inside of my car's engine that I look at when I'm questioning my confidence.
I had an engine die, the replacement then blew a head gasket, I worked 30 miles away and figured out how to make it to work by bicycle for 2 months while learning how to replace head gaskets on the weekends.
Nothing boosts your confidence like overcoming that kind of obstacle.
Thank you for mentioning the personality disorder issue! Two weeks in and a coworker casually mentioned that he suspected the boss to be schizophrenic. Since that day the pieces started fall in the right place and I saw more and more toxic and even dangerous behaviours like demeaning and gaslighting, swearing, fraud,... I left without notice one evening and couldn't even find the courage to bring back my badge. They didn't pay my Christmas Day which was the day after and so legally required to be payed.
This video is definitely needed. Used your video to leave. Still recovering almost a year ❤❤❤
I’ve been retired for a year now, and I’m still having stress from working in a school district in California for 20 years.
Being a guy is hard in the district. My last boss was a female school principal that hated men and would just talk to me really mean when no one was around. I filed a complaint with upper management and HR, and no one would listen to me, they kept shuffling me around. I was told that I needed to be very careful because she was a girl, and I would be on the losing end if it ever came down to my word against hers.
It’s been 15 months since I’ve retired, and I’m still struggling to get over the stress.
Hey great video! I like your channel a lot. I'm in an environment now where I feel slightly depressed and anxious (to varying levels) the majority of the time. I had a job mess with me years ago in the same way. All the way back in 2005. I remember waking up feeling like crap on Saturdays. That's when you know its time to go.
I worked for a university in the UK in the electrical department's. I was destroyed over 8 years by a toxic working environment. Other peoples tramping ambition I never recovered. I was too badly damaged. That was 20 years ago!
Here from future Jennifer's link on my quitting day, processing my just over 3mos in a toxic company. Last night I figured I was financially positioned where i could quit this morning and wait for my new job to do all the redtape stuff. What I didn't expect was getting a little emotional telling my direct manager that I was leaving, mostly because of the other manager. For about two hours after leaving, I felt emotionally depleted, not sure I've never felt like that. I had planned the rest of my freedom day to go explore and had moments of giddiness, because I escaped. I know I need to take time to process it all, even with just the short time I was there,
I can’t thank you enough for your site! I’ve been looking for something since I can’t afford a life coach. You are an absolute Godsend!!
Hi Jennifer just came across this. And I am going thru it now. Trying to get back into therapy to start getting everything in perspective. I had closure with my boss and of course they always make it seem like it your fault. You didnt take the OT when it was given she said. I told her the company messed me over. And other things that were going on. She didnt NEVER acknowledge anything. Lots of politics and biases there. They dont care how they make ppl feel. Im glad i left. But now I am working on letting go. And not holding on to any messed up stuff in the place. I thought of taking some time off before I start my new job to clear my head but not sure if i can. I probably will tho. Thanks.
I'm on my way out of a toxic workplace. My last day is in 2 days and I'm glad to be leaving but definitely have scars. I'm worried that the new job is going to be toxic as well but I don't want to think like that.
I know I'm an awesome person and an awesome coworker once you get to know me. I'm using this video to reboost my confidence.
Thank you for all this info. I’m currently working on getting myself out of a toxic work environment. Scary at my age.
I went through an extremely toxic relationship with a boss that has impacted me to this day, and that's that I own my own company now. It takes a TON of effort and work to heal through this. Thank you for sharing this.
I’m in a toxic job now and it’s horrible. I feel like leaving it so bad but I don’t have anything else lined up. I feel so anxious every single day. It’s just gets worse and worse. I am so scared of getting a new job as well. I dream of work every single day. It’s awful
I used to be a very quiet and passive person at work. I haven't been able to work for 6 years due to working in a toxic working environment for 18 years. It has made me an extremely volatile person, who lacks patience and empathy. If I went back to work and my boss upset me, I wouldn't hesitate to knock them out cold and walk out.
You hit every bullet points that has had me struck and emotional bound❗ 🙋🏾➰🙇🏾
Been almost a year in therapy since I quit and am still working thru trauma. Currently on Step 4..and all I can think of is watching that cursed building burn to the ground
I needed this. Even years after a toxic work environment.
I guess my end goal is just to get a position where I will be able to come and go from a toxic work environment on my own terms. That either means climbing the ladder and trying to get a supervisor position where I have little to no dealings with others telling me what to do, or get a job where I am working from home or start my own side hustle that eventually turns into a full blown business. In this day in age I’ve just come to learn that it’s going to be near impossible to find a toxic-free work environment. I just need to work on bettering myself so I can have more options open for getting away from the BS.
what you actually need is a cathartic experience to help you get your power back. I still don't know what activity that is.
Face it out leave..but dont leave to hurly otherwise you gonna have a hard Time to recover. Go all thé way ...and dont bé ashamed for what péople do to you.
thank you, this has been really helpful as I face into my last few days in the toxic place