It’s so weird that the parents want it spend on something that’s relatively similar (retirement savings vs dumping it into mortgage). Both are good investments with high return. Seems silly to squabble over which
@@TonyCox1351 A large amount of people think you should never pay off your house. That you can make more money investing the money. I guess that’s why the parents want her to put it into an investment retirement fund.
@@TonyCox1351 yeah id probably do full funded emergency fund, pay off any debt other than mortgage, then put half in retirement and the other half on the mortgage. It doesn't need to be all one way or the other.
Rachel and Dave are great together because she being his daughter, she can get away with a different level of banter that you just don't get with the other co-hosts lol.
She got pretty worried when she stepped over Dave’s words. She is worried about what dad thinks, just like most daughters would, lol. Cute none the less.
Btw, “honoring” your parents is VERY different from “obeying” your parents. ADULT children DO NOT owe obedience to their parents. Period. But suggestions are welcome, sometimes. 😉
👍 Precisely. This is consistent with an understanding I have formulated. Honoring them doesn't mean condoning their bad (if any) behavior either. I think God knew the Israelites were behaving badly while Moses was on the mountain - He still included honoring parents in the Ten Commandments. Later, Jesus rebuked the Pharisees (Matthew 15) for disregarding that very important Commandment. Rachel is demonstrating a very good example of this; both on how she handled Dave's disagreement, and in the advice she is passing on to the caller when explaining how to approach her parents.
“You live under my roof, you live under my rules” is null and void when you become an adult, move out, and become financially independent from them. My parents were angry that I decided to pay off my student loans and not go into more debt buying a house I didn’t want or need when I became a doctor. I just said “my money, my rules”, and did what I wanted to anyway. Dave is 100% right.
That's exactly how my parents are. Ever since i've moved out, they've wanted me to buy a newer car and I just won't do it. I love them from a distance, but I'm not gonna heed their advice to finance a depreciating asset.
Yes! Many people don't have the wherewithall to do it Dave's way. I think it's a good idea to have Dave's attitude but to express it kindly, gently, a la Rachel.
Wow, go Rachel! I’ve noticed over the years that Dave kind of dominates the conversations and options (a trait I can personally relate to and totally understand) and cohosts usually acquiesce, but you stood your ground with him and insisted your point be considered on its merits. Well done!
Dave and Rachel are a great combo. I feel that Rachel could be genuine and funny without worrying about what Dave thinks. The other personalities always seem like they are trying to “impress” Dave. John Delony is good too because he offers something from a different profession but still relates it to finance stuff
I've lived this! DO NOT EXPLAIN YOURSELF!!! Set the boundary and be done. If the parents then want to have a legit conversation about the decision because they are curious and unjudgemental about it, then go for it, but it must be separate from the boundary setting.
My mother told me that, if someone gave me money (expecially a rich relative, and there were some of those), say THANK YOU. If the person then tells you what to do with it, just give it back.
The back and forth between Dave and Rachel is top tier. Dave has a big personality and often steamrolls his cohost when he has one and Rachel is consistently the best at pushing back and standing firm. Also props to Rachel buying a Tesla with cash - big baller move there 😂
It's also evidence that Dave is legitimately a nice guy. He still has a good relationship with her. Cause she could definitely be successful elsewhere, she doesn't have to stay.
As a chronic explainer and a person who buys guilt trips, I agree with Dave. Don't try to explain. When there aren't healthy boundaries, explaining makes things worse. Just do what you want and avoid the conversation. If they question you, give as short an answer as you can. It's not rude. It's how you avoid resentment. Just don't feel like you owe anyone an explanation. It sounds like they might just have a different opinion. They might not care. She might be begging for advice. It's okay to get it, and decide to take a different route.
Honestly how much she says to her parents depends on how healthy her parents are. Healthy parents, you can tell them why you're doing what you're doing. Unhealthy parents, smile and keep your mouth shut and do what you want.
Exactly. Honestly from the call it sounded like she was the one who asked her parents for advice. It didn’t sound like they overstepped at all - so she can just make her decision and explain it to them and everyone will be okay.
Since the grandparents left her such a significant amount of money, I would say that they must have felt that she was honoring them while they were alive.
Some parents are very controlling people. After age 18 , these parents cannot ground their children or take away their phone or car keys, so they use money. The parents don’t want to relinquish control. The parents have untreated psychological problems. Usually, they’re arrogant and think they’re always right and they don’t respect personal boundaries. Not being in control of their adult children triggers anxiety and anger in them frequently. I have one of these parents. You cannot share information about your life like a child should be able to do with a parent. You aren’t close to your parent like adult children who have parents with a little humility and who respect boundaries.
I can relate to this, idk how a mother can be against this. I'm 35 and she is against me having ANY children for whatever reason. It's heartbreaking 💔 however I'm doing it with or without "approval"
This call was almost calling me through UA-cam lol. I’m in a situation with my sister and my children on what to do with my recent check I’ve received. I’m afraid to do anything with the money now 😢 I wish I never brought it up in the first place. Great show as always! Kate is great 💕😊
Ignore what the parents say and just do what you’re going to do. Tell them thanks for their concern but you’ve got it covered . You’ve got to shut the topic down and don’t discuss with them. It might be uncomfortable at first but it will get easier each time.
Love this, I may or may not have been yelling preach multiple time when this was going on lol!! God bless Dave, Rachel, and the lady and her parents!!!
She shouldn’t have to ask for approval from her parents nor explain to them what she’s going to do with the money. None of it is their business. It’s not her job to make mommy and daddy happy anymore.
I agree with Dave. None of us owe anyone an explanation. It’s what I’m teaching my kids right now with their friends. This way they can learn it now and not have that weight to have to explain ourselves to others, or to worry about what others think of what we do, not necessary at all!!
There is so much behind her parent’s opinion. They want her to be secure for years even if the marriage implodes. They might see something she’s missing like her house has been funded by her family one way or another but she’ll have to split it with her husband in case of a divorce. 😮😮 Maybe allow her husband to contribute more toward the house while she builds up a retirement/emergency fund.
I love seeing them answering questions/giving financial advice together; I find them to be the best of the Ramsey personalities individually and together.
I like the female touch Rachel brings. Woman are very emotional so it's never cut and dry when it comes to things like telling your parents no. Also she is the only one that can stand up to Dave because that's Dave baby girl so she know her job is safe lol
I work in an oil and gas adjacent industry and I'm excited for when I finally buy my first EV. It's too early for me in my opinion because I live in a cold climate so I bought a used next to new gas vehicle but I don't doubt my next vehicle will be an EV.
Honestly, I think both ways are great, so maybe just do a little bit of both if you're in this situation? - Topping up the emergency fund: yes, definitely, life is so much better and less stressful when you know you can just pay for that emergency repair, bridge the gap between jobs if you get laid off, pay that unexpected hospital bill... This should be your highest priority no matter what you do with the rest of the money. - Paying off the mortgage: sure, it saves a bunch of interest if you do it towards principal and use it to shorten the mortgage while keeping the same monthly payment, but maybe don't go all-in if the rate isn't too high (a little bit if it's under 3%, a bit more if it's 3-4%, all-in if it's over 4%) and definitely invest more once it's paid off. - House repairs: are they urgent? Do they add what you put in as value to the home? If so: do it, better than taking it out of the emergency account. If it can wait: wait. If it doesn't add the money you spent in value: find a cheaper solution. - Investing: do you already invest enough to have a good life later on? A dollar invested when you're 30 is worth a lot more than a dollar invested when you're 40. Depending on how much you already invest and have invested, and depending on the mortgage rate, it could be a better idea to go all-in on this or balance investing/mortgage.
If Rachel bought a Tesla with inheritance money while neglecting to pay off her debts, then Dave Ramsey would be tooting a different horn entirely. He would be lining her out like no one's business.
Sometimes Dave is not true to himself. He says he’s not disappointment, please. He is just saying that because the lady who called is on Dave’s side. Imagine the lady said the family wants to follow Dave and the lady wants to do something else’s, he will roll his eyes and moans and says don’t be stupid when people don’t follow his teachings. I have heard him say that multiple times.
Here’s how you respond to parents…awesome, thanks mom and dad…and then go do what you and your husband want. NO EXPLANATION TO YOUR PARENTS… they don’t need to know!!!!!
That is what I told my friend who feels like he will be judges by his parents for working as a personal trainer; I am like they do not need to know what you do in that gym.
I don't see why her parents would object to them using their inheritance to complete their emergency fund and pay down their mortgage. I mean, it's not like they are planning on buying his and her 's Teslas or something.
This time I agree with Rachel’s advice. Sorry Dave. Even if you’re right and have the right to say anything you want, it doesn’t mean you should. Telling your parents that they don’t get a vote… is a bit disrespectful and condescending. Be patient and take the time to explain why you want to do things your way is perfectly fine and reasonable. It’s a chance for the kids to grow up and communicate like empathetic adults do and for parents to learn a thing or two by listening to them and understand that your kids got mind and heart of their own and they can handle their lives. Adult children should always understand boundaries and hold firm to your beliefs. But always be kind and respectful!
I agreed with Dave! Partially to Rachel. This is how I’d go: it’s sad that you are disappointed. I appreciate the advice but it’s and advice. I decided to do something else. If you want to hear I will explain, but explaining it does not give the right to discuss if I should do or not. I have weighted & made my decision.
I get my back up often because of the WAY people phrase suggestions. Things are often said like "do this" rather than "maybe you can think about doing this", i.e., as a command rather than proposing an option. The speaker has an obligation to phrase things the right way but the listener has the obligation to hear it with sensibility.
Many of us daughters totally understand what Rachael is saying. We were just raised to be polite and respectful which you can still do while being strong and independent.
I agree with her, the parents aren’t owed the explanation on why they don’t get a vote, but it’s worth considering doing. It makes the pill easier to swallow.
Their interaction is hilarious! She didn’t offer an explanation because Dave didn’t offer his advice expecting it to be followed. The callers parents don’t have that healthy boundary.
Question - the caller mentioned the parents wanting her to do some home repairs. If the home needs work (new roof, new furnace, new A/C, etc), do those cash with this money. Whatever is left, put towards the mortgage.
I agree with Dave about being firmer on the boundary. But also, I LOVE listening to Rachel push back against Dave. My hunch is she is one of 2 people on the planet who can push back effectively, the other being Mrs. Ramsey.
I was surprised no one suggested a split. Why did the decision have to be just one way or the other? She could have taken 20% and dropped it in retirement and put the rest where she wanted. In this case appeasing the parents a little is still a sound financial decision.
My parents helped us buy our house- the strings attached were them expecting us to give full finicial transparency to them, for them to stay with us when ever and for however ever long, and then to attack us and criticize us every time they stayed (which was very often), they had to have "their way" with our wedding- either not "allowed" to invite our friends, combining it with a baby shower, not allowed to elope either- we just wanted to go to court but that wasn't good enough, they come in my house criticize my parenting, my cleanliness (pls note this coming from a mother who used to make me spring clean with a tooth pick), just verbally abuse me and my husband over everything in the world every single time they're here.
Look up narcissistic parents in the magazine Psychology Today. Sounds like you have one for a parent. I have one too. Fortunately, I was wise to my parent by the time I was offered a gift of a down payment for a home. I saw my brother take money from my parent. Then, my parent tried to steamroll him into living according to my parent’s tastes. Just like your parent does to you.
This was interesting, it's the way agreeable (Rachel) & disagreeable (Dave) approach an issue - neither is wrong. Note : Agreeableness/Disagreeableness is a personality trait - both have their advantages/disadvantages (I am disagreeable 😎).
if I consigned a loan for the child to go to college, you dang well better believe I get to tell them what to do with the money they make until that loan is paid. I know this doesn't apply in this case here.
rachel's advice is better. also, a lot of families function together, and monitor each other's spending. everyone isn't on the independent, do what i want train after 18.
After FFEF, why not put 15% in retirement in addition to paying toward the home mortgage? That's not only a compromise but also BB steps 4 & 6 which work together.
You'd think that most parents would simply be thrilled that she's not blowing it all on new cars and fancy vacations.
Haha the problem is some parents aren't most parents. Maybe they're better, but you get different problems 😅
Why would someone not want their kid to travel?!
It’s so weird that the parents want it spend on something that’s relatively similar (retirement savings vs dumping it into mortgage). Both are good investments with high return. Seems silly to squabble over which
@@TonyCox1351 A large amount of people think you should never pay off your house. That you can make more money investing the money. I guess that’s why the parents want her to put it into an investment retirement fund.
@@TonyCox1351 yeah id probably do full funded emergency fund, pay off any debt other than mortgage, then put half in retirement and the other half on the mortgage. It doesn't need to be all one way or the other.
Rachel and Dave are great together because she being his daughter, she can get away with a different level of banter that you just don't get with the other co-hosts lol.
She got pretty worried when she stepped over Dave’s words. She is worried about what dad thinks, just like most daughters would, lol. Cute none the less.
@@Frank00yea but at least she does it unlike the other hosts who are terrified of him lol
Oh that’s his daughter??
Finna call in to tell her to shut up
😂😂😂
Btw, “honoring” your parents is VERY different from “obeying” your parents. ADULT children DO NOT owe obedience to their parents. Period. But suggestions are welcome, sometimes. 😉
❤❤❤
👍 Precisely. This is consistent with an understanding I have formulated. Honoring them doesn't mean condoning their bad (if any) behavior either. I think God knew the Israelites were behaving badly while Moses was on the mountain - He still included honoring parents in the Ten Commandments. Later, Jesus rebuked the Pharisees (Matthew 15) for disregarding that very important Commandment.
Rachel is demonstrating a very good example of this; both on how she handled Dave's disagreement, and in the advice she is passing on to the caller when explaining how to approach her parents.
We all have choice and there are consequences. It's her money and if she's spending and investing it responsibly, that's her choice.
“You live under my roof, you live under my rules” is null and void when you become an adult, move out, and become financially independent from them. My parents were angry that I decided to pay off my student loans and not go into more debt buying a house I didn’t want or need when I became a doctor. I just said “my money, my rules”, and did what I wanted to anyway. Dave is 100% right.
That's exactly how my parents are.
Ever since i've moved out, they've wanted me to buy a newer car and I just won't do it. I love them from a distance, but I'm not gonna heed their advice to finance a depreciating asset.
And you made the right decision to pay off your student loan before buying a house. 👍
ANGRY BECAUSE YOU PAID OFF STUDENT LOANS?? What did they expect you do?
Yes! Many people don't have the wherewithall to do it Dave's way. I think it's a good idea to have Dave's attitude but to express it kindly, gently, a la Rachel.
I absolutely love watching Dave and Rachel. Such a good balance and genuinely funny
She can talk her mind because he won’t fire her. It makes for a better dynamic.
I think it's so much fun watching those two
Wow, go Rachel! I’ve noticed over the years that Dave kind of dominates the conversations and options (a trait I can personally relate to and totally understand) and cohosts usually acquiesce, but you stood your ground with him and insisted your point be considered on its merits. Well done!
Dave and Rachel are a great combo. I feel that Rachel could be genuine and funny without worrying about what Dave thinks. The other personalities always seem like they are trying to “impress” Dave. John Delony is good too because he offers something from a different profession but still relates it to finance stuff
Well, it's her dad not their dad
Well it’s logical. He won’t fire his daughter lol
Agreed on the other personalities having a different energy around Dave.
Rachel was given the position, not earned the hard way.
not trying to impress, he is their boss, do not cut off your boss or disagree. idk what is so hard to understand
Rachel is right! Having the conversation is not a lack of boundaries, as long as she has the conversation ONCE and her parents then drop it
I love it when Daughter gets on her dad like this 4:10. You can see how connected Dave is with his family.
I've lived this! DO NOT EXPLAIN YOURSELF!!! Set the boundary and be done. If the parents then want to have a legit conversation about the decision because they are curious and unjudgemental about it, then go for it, but it must be separate from the boundary setting.
...and don't receive money from family open ended..
My mother told me that, if someone gave me money (expecially a rich relative, and there were some of those), say THANK YOU. If the person then tells you what to do with it, just give it back.
Thank you for the advise. Period.
The back and forth between Dave and Rachel is top tier. Dave has a big personality and often steamrolls his cohost when he has one and Rachel is consistently the best at pushing back and standing firm. Also props to Rachel buying a Tesla with cash - big baller move there 😂
It's also evidence that Dave is legitimately a nice guy. He still has a good relationship with her. Cause she could definitely be successful elsewhere, she doesn't have to stay.
As a chronic explainer and a person who buys guilt trips, I agree with Dave. Don't try to explain. When there aren't healthy boundaries, explaining makes things worse. Just do what you want and avoid the conversation. If they question you, give as short an answer as you can. It's not rude. It's how you avoid resentment. Just don't feel like you owe anyone an explanation. It sounds like they might just have a different opinion. They might not care. She might be begging for advice. It's okay to get it, and decide to take a different route.
I love the Relief Society motto name! :)
Rachel: Sorry go what! (Taps Dave on the arm) while Dave proceeds losing his mind made my day lol
Honestly how much she says to her parents depends on how healthy her parents are. Healthy parents, you can tell them why you're doing what you're doing. Unhealthy parents, smile and keep your mouth shut and do what you want.
Exactly. Honestly from the call it sounded like she was the one who asked her parents for advice. It didn’t sound like they overstepped at all - so she can just make her decision and explain it to them and everyone will be okay.
You could say thank you for teaching me to handle money correctly. We got this now. 👍
Great idea.
Since the grandparents left her such a significant amount of money, I would say that they must have felt that she was honoring them while they were alive.
I'm still trying to wrap my mind around why a 30-year old married woman's parents and grandparents are mixed up in each-other's financial affairs.
It happens a lot, unfortunately.
Some parents are very controlling people. After age 18 , these parents cannot ground their children or take away their phone or car keys, so they use money. The parents don’t want to relinquish control. The parents have untreated psychological problems. Usually, they’re arrogant and think they’re always right and they don’t respect personal boundaries. Not being in control of their adult children triggers anxiety and anger in them frequently.
I have one of these parents. You cannot share information about your life like a child should be able to do with a parent. You aren’t close to your parent like adult children who have parents with a little humility and who respect boundaries.
Come meet my family everyone thinks they have an opinion and they know more than me and they always "want to help."
This was one of the best family bantering I’ve heard in a while, hilarious!
Dave is right on this one. I made my decision at 35 to have another child, my mother disagreed. Imagine me explaining to her WHY .
I can relate to this, idk how a mother can be against this. I'm 35 and she is against me having ANY children for whatever reason. It's heartbreaking 💔 however I'm doing it with or without "approval"
Rachel and Dave are by far the most entertaining combination
Entertaining and dumb as rocks.
Awesome interaction between Dave and Rachel!
This call was almost calling me through UA-cam lol. I’m in a situation with my sister and my children on what to do with my recent check I’ve received. I’m afraid to do anything with the money now 😢 I wish I never brought it up in the first place. Great show as always! Kate is great 💕😊
I love the Dave/Rachel dynamic.
Totally agree with Rachel here. She brings such a wonderful breath of fresh air to this show.
Your daughters reactions are precious Dave!
Ignore what the parents say and just do what you’re going to do. Tell them thanks for their concern but you’ve got it covered . You’ve got to shut the topic down and don’t discuss with them. It might be uncomfortable at first but it will get easier each time.
These two are hilariously adorable together
Love this, I may or may not have been yelling preach multiple time when this was going on lol!! God bless Dave, Rachel, and the lady and her parents!!!
She shouldn’t have to ask for approval from her parents nor explain to them what she’s going to do with the money. None of it is their business. It’s not her job to make mommy and daddy happy anymore.
I agree with Dave. None of us owe anyone an explanation. It’s what I’m teaching my kids right now with their friends. This way they can learn it now and not have that weight to have to explain ourselves to others, or to worry about what others think of what we do, not necessary at all!!
It's not about the parents. It's about KAte starting to build those boundaries. IF not now, then when.
Love Rachel and Dave's dynamic as always!
Rachel is his daughter
Yes what a wonderful dynamic between father and daughter
@@cuh720 and?
I had to tell my dad I was grown and would be making my own decisions now.
Don’t ever let your parents or other family members tell you how to live.
And never ask for money ever.
I love that Rachel and Dave can disagree respectfully...
Dave and Rachel, you two are soo funny 😆
There is so much behind her parent’s opinion. They want her to be secure for years even if the marriage implodes. They might see something she’s missing like her house has been funded by her family one way or another but she’ll have to split it with her husband in case of a divorce. 😮😮 Maybe allow her husband to contribute more toward the house while she builds up a retirement/emergency fund.
😅 this is hilarious.. Dave's and his daughters back and forth
Honour your parents always brings blessing. You can still do with your money as you wish and honour them
You are absolutely right. Unfortunately for the caller parents like her mom and dad confuse honor with obey.
Moon beam 🤣🤣
Best conversation between father and daughter. I liked this one.
This was absolutely the funniest session! Oh my! Loved the banter between dad and daughter.
I love rachel and ramseys relationship!
I love seeing them answering questions/giving financial advice together; I find them to be the best of the Ramsey personalities individually and together.
Rachel and Dave make a great combo! Such a cute dynamic between them
Agreed! She's not afraid to give a different approach/opinion!!
Their father daughter dinamic is awesome
I like Rachael's way of appoarching. I love how Dave brought up the tesla. 😂😂
This was hilarious. And, I love that Rachael got a Tesla!!! I want one too….someday.
I love it when Rachel is on. Ready for more female leadership with a healthy father daughter/parent child relationship!
Love how Rachel doesn’t mind being snarky with her dad. So entertaining to see
Dear Mom and Dad:
You had your chance with your life. Let me have my chance with mine.
I like the female touch Rachel brings. Woman are very emotional so it's never cut and dry when it comes to things like telling your parents no. Also she is the only one that can stand up to Dave because that's Dave baby girl so she know her job is safe lol
Emotional = stupid and reckless
I work in an oil and gas adjacent industry and I'm excited for when I finally buy my first EV. It's too early for me in my opinion because I live in a cold climate so I bought a used next to new gas vehicle but I don't doubt my next vehicle will be an EV.
"I would never say you shouldn't do this, stop being stupid. I never said any of that!" Dave's underhanded way of saying all of that. Lol
Honestly, I think both ways are great, so maybe just do a little bit of both if you're in this situation?
- Topping up the emergency fund: yes, definitely, life is so much better and less stressful when you know you can just pay for that emergency repair, bridge the gap between jobs if you get laid off, pay that unexpected hospital bill... This should be your highest priority no matter what you do with the rest of the money.
- Paying off the mortgage: sure, it saves a bunch of interest if you do it towards principal and use it to shorten the mortgage while keeping the same monthly payment, but maybe don't go all-in if the rate isn't too high (a little bit if it's under 3%, a bit more if it's 3-4%, all-in if it's over 4%) and definitely invest more once it's paid off.
- House repairs: are they urgent? Do they add what you put in as value to the home? If so: do it, better than taking it out of the emergency account. If it can wait: wait. If it doesn't add the money you spent in value: find a cheaper solution.
- Investing: do you already invest enough to have a good life later on? A dollar invested when you're 30 is worth a lot more than a dollar invested when you're 40. Depending on how much you already invest and have invested, and depending on the mortgage rate, it could be a better idea to go all-in on this or balance investing/mortgage.
theres no need to tell the parents that you didnt follow their advice.... she should do what she wants and let them be none the wiser
Team Dave and Rachael is always interesting. They have different perspectives.
Good news is either her or her parents are both looking at something reasonable.
If Rachel bought a Tesla with inheritance money while neglecting to pay off her debts, then Dave Ramsey would be tooting a different horn entirely. He would be lining her out like no one's business.
How would he know what her debts are?
@@superblump87 They're family? Most families know about each other's finances etc
Sometimes Dave is not true to himself. He says he’s not disappointment, please. He is just saying that because the lady who called is on Dave’s side.
Imagine the lady said the family wants to follow Dave and the lady wants to do something else’s, he will roll his eyes and moans and says don’t be stupid when people don’t follow his teachings. I have heard him say that multiple times.
@HSFY2012 mine don't. I NEVER discuss MY money with anyone.
She's not doing anything.
Here’s how you respond to parents…awesome, thanks mom and dad…and then go do what you and your husband want. NO EXPLANATION TO YOUR PARENTS… they don’t need to know!!!!!
That is what I told my friend who feels like he will be judges by his parents for working as a personal trainer; I am like they do not need to know what you do in that gym.
I don't see why her parents would object to them using their inheritance to complete their emergency fund and pay down their mortgage. I mean, it's not like they are planning on buying his and her 's Teslas or something.
All I know is it sounds like she has great parents who care ‘ and a great family
We’re talking about what she’s wants and what the parents want, but why aren’t we talking about what the dog wants?
😂😂😂😂
Rachel is the only cohost with the balls to stand up to Dave, that’s why she’s the goat. Technically goat jr, Dave’s the goat. 🐐
This time I agree with Rachel’s advice. Sorry Dave. Even if you’re right and have the right to say anything you want, it doesn’t mean you should.
Telling your parents that they don’t get a vote… is a bit disrespectful and condescending. Be patient and take the time to explain why you want to do things your way is perfectly fine and reasonable.
It’s a chance for the kids to grow up and communicate like empathetic adults do and for parents to learn a thing or two by listening to them and understand that your kids got mind and heart of their own and they can handle their lives.
Adult children should always understand boundaries and hold firm to your beliefs. But always be kind and respectful!
Option C: don't tell them what you chose to do with it
Hey Dave, keep in mind your Ford has mufflers, & Rachael's Tesla does not have them. 😆😆 CHEERS!
This episode was hilarious 😂
I love when Rachel and her dad argue.
Tell your parents ok and do what you want!
These two together are great🎉
Rachel's 100% right here.
I agreed with Dave! Partially to Rachel.
This is how I’d go: it’s sad that you are disappointed. I appreciate the advice but it’s and advice. I decided to do something else. If you want to hear I will explain, but explaining it does not give the right to discuss if I should do or not. I have weighted & made my decision.
I get my back up often because of the WAY people phrase suggestions. Things are often said like "do this" rather than "maybe you can think about doing this", i.e., as a command rather than proposing an option. The speaker has an obligation to phrase things the right way but the listener has the obligation to hear it with sensibility.
I adore you David and Rachel!!!! You remind me of my relation with my dad! ❤😊
Many of us daughters totally understand what Rachael is saying. We were just raised to be polite and respectful which you can still do while being strong and independent.
Same deal with my parents. They are literally trying to leverage things over my head to get stuff out of me.
I agree with her, the parents aren’t owed the explanation on why they don’t get a vote, but it’s worth considering doing. It makes the pill easier to swallow.
Rachel you are so cool about the Tesla enjoy the jokes about it hahhahaha
Their interaction is hilarious! She didn’t offer an explanation because Dave didn’t offer his advice expecting it to be followed. The callers parents don’t have that healthy boundary.
Dave is right in this situation!
Hello does the house need to be fixed????
Pay off your bills. With 80 percent of your mortgage gone you are much closer to freeing up all of your future income for investing.
Dave is the type that would poke and poke and poke, making shady comments, and then get offended when the person bites back.
Lmao Dave was going crazy 😂
Question - the caller mentioned the parents wanting her to do some home repairs. If the home needs work (new roof, new furnace, new A/C, etc), do those cash with this money. Whatever is left, put towards the mortgage.
Text on telegram⬆️⬆️
I agree with Dave about being firmer on the boundary. But also, I LOVE listening to Rachel push back against Dave. My hunch is she is one of 2 people on the planet who can push back effectively, the other being Mrs. Ramsey.
Telling someone, anyone, even parents they don’t have a free pass to walk all over your boundaries is not mean.
Making way to big a deal outta this.
Kinda wonder if Dave is allowing Rachel to charge the Tesla on Ramsey Solutions office power.
He is. He talked about that before lol 😂
George bought one, too. Must drive Dave crazy! LOL
Did Dave Buy Rachel a gas electric generator on a trailer to tow behind the Tesla? 😁
I was surprised no one suggested a split. Why did the decision have to be just one way or the other? She could have taken 20% and dropped it in retirement and put the rest where she wanted. In this case appeasing the parents a little is still a sound financial decision.
This is why i refuse to accept monetary gifts from anyone
How will they know.
My parents helped us buy our house- the strings attached were them expecting us to give full finicial transparency to them, for them to stay with us when ever and for however ever long, and then to attack us and criticize us every time they stayed (which was very often), they had to have "their way" with our wedding- either not "allowed" to invite our friends, combining it with a baby shower, not allowed to elope either- we just wanted to go to court but that wasn't good enough, they come in my house criticize my parenting, my cleanliness (pls note this coming from a mother who used to make me spring clean with a tooth pick), just verbally abuse me and my husband over everything in the world every single time they're here.
Look up narcissistic parents in the magazine Psychology Today. Sounds like you have one for a parent.
I have one too. Fortunately, I was wise to my parent by the time I was offered a gift of a down payment for a home. I saw my brother take money from my parent. Then, my parent tried to steamroll him into living according to my parent’s tastes. Just like your parent does to you.
This was interesting, it's the way agreeable (Rachel) & disagreeable (Dave) approach an issue - neither is wrong.
Note : Agreeableness/Disagreeableness is a personality trait - both have their advantages/disadvantages (I am disagreeable 😎).
You're an adult. Your parents don't get to tell you what to do. They can offer advice, but that's about it.
if I consigned a loan for the child to go to college, you dang well better believe I get to tell them what to do with the money they make until that loan is paid. I know this doesn't apply in this case here.
Glad you don’t respect your parents..boomers raised a generation of druggies..
@@insideoutsideupsidedown2218 This wasn't about co-signing a loan.
rachel's advice is better. also, a lot of families function together, and monitor each other's spending. everyone isn't on the independent, do what i want train after 18.
After FFEF, why not put 15% in retirement in addition to paying toward the home mortgage? That's not only a compromise but also BB steps 4 & 6 which work together.