How I got into Harvard Residency after 140 Rejections
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- Опубліковано 21 лип 2024
- Dr. K's Guide release August 18th! bit.ly/3As3wsP
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#psychiatrist #medicalschool #rejection
We only call things "hard work" when we think we're suffering and sacrificing something. You can work long hours in a state of ease. You can be persistent at a task without feeling like it's a grind. You can be results oriented without debilitating fear. You can do things outside of your comfort zone and be okay with the discomfort. So, ask yourself: at what point did I start to associate effort with a negative emotion? What emotion is it? Why?
What should we call it instead of hard work?
@@coolpfpbut9505 acting
@@coolpfpbut9505 A good replacement might be challenging work, but challenging in what way? It helps to be specific. Does it require a lot of time, attention to detail, creativity, skills, etc? And then say that. Ultimately, it's not so much that using the term "hard work" is bad but rather that it's vague and typically means "I've suffered and want compensation" rather than "this task challenged me at my current ability" or "this was a time-consuming project"
Dr. K alt account? For real though, great insight
Fear of boredom. Fear of self-judgement for failure.
My favourite proverb is 七転び八起き。"Nana koro bi yao-ki" translates to "Fall down seven times, stand up eight."
Are you chinese?
Thanks so much for this comment
@@GabrielSimp This is Japanese, chinese would probably be 七転八起 or something (I don't know chinese lol), chinese does not have hiragana.
なるほどね!
@@happylittlemy It's often written as 七転八起 in Japanese anyway as a four-character phrase.
not to be dramatic but this youtube channel has changed my life
i hope in a good way 😅
@@fools. lol yeah in a good way
Same!
It is really good! I've been intensely studying psychology on my own for 4 years and thought I'd heard everything, but found this channel and was overjoyed at the new perspectives and fantastic lessons Dr. K has. He's so good at offering ways to move forward through life and not just focusing on what happened in the past like a lot of other channels do. That stuff is all fine and good to understand and know, it's definitely important, but eventually it feels like a rut and it's not helping anymore. Dr. K is the antidote to that rut. 😊
AOOOOE
genuinely felt a lump in my throat when he said he wished he'd saved the rejection letters. It's such a powerful statement cuz it's how I really feel - I think that people who can stomach being rejected so many times are just... amazing. You have to have incredible willpower to do that. And the thought of being so proud of all your hard work during your search for a med school that you hang it up on your wall....
I'm currently in the process of applying for jobs, and I got 1 rejection (by email) so far. I'm gonna save em all and make a collage of all my rejections lol
good luck with that sir! keep trying and you'll get it
:)
Keep at it. It took me almost a year to find a job I was happy with. Even taking a quick peek at a jobsite every day can eventually lead to something.
I got a new job today after many failed phone calls and applications. Hang in there buddy! It can be very taxing being unemployed so keep hope up and take care of yourself :)
Go for it, you can get it.
I'm 27, haven't touched college because I always felt I shouldn't go because of "what if's". I registered and start in a few weeks. This has really helped me to cope with emotions about it. Thanks Dr. K!
How's the journey so far?
Hey man, did u get into college?
I’m 27 too bro and thinking of pulling a DR K and going to med school, you got dis!!
As someone who applied to 50 jobs and internships this past spring, I did not expect any outcome. When I came to peace with the fact I tried my hardest and it just didn’t work out, i got an internship that paid 61% more than my current part time job I had lined up. Anything more than my effort was a blessing
I applied to 150 architecture jobs before i got one. Keep rolling the dice! 🎲
Quick question please...Did you meet the requirements or did you feel like you were qualified for all of those? I sometimes hesitate to apply when its the case for me
@@jeuneambitieux Sometimes employers put more requirements than they are actually looking for... like they state 3 years of experience is needed, but they will hire you with two. So no, I wasn't "perfectly" qualified for every job I applied for, but I knew I could perform the tasks of the job just as well as anyone else. Try to apply for jobs that you are slightly underqualified for too, they just might want you anyway!
African proverb: "One does not forgo sleeping in fear of nightmares." Not even a gamer but I goddamn love this channel and Dr.K
Get c0l0nised by big white men
Apparently sleep deprivation is worse than nightmares.
@@jackmak2980 lol what
@@jackmak2980 lol I swear every attempt on positive comment on youtube will immediately be replied with an 11 year old trolls smh
I like it!
23, long story of depression, and tomorrow im going to apply to a college for the first time since high school. I, in part, have you to thank for it. Thank you for being one of the strands upon the rope with which I have been slowly pulling myself out of this quicksand.
Hope you're doing well mate
@@adityan3208 Doing great actually. Not in college but on the path there!
Good luck! I believe in you.
"Adopt a Genshin Impact mindset. Gotta grind."
Me looking at my one Crit Damage hat for that specific artifact set after getting dozens of Def/HP hat.
*This man speaks the truth.*
Me half listening until he said "Adopt a Genshin Impact"
Me: -a what?. Wow now which one-
As a self taught programmer who's struggling really hard at my coding project at the moment this was very much needed. Thank you Dr K
I hope it helps you. I'm in a similar boat, been dabbling with self teaching programming but fear is paralyzing me and its mainly because of everything said in this video. Been so focused on programming to get a job and make money etc and not like, just focusing on my actions and slowly getting better at it without expecting anything. Good luck.
@@justinwatson146 I'm a web developer 1-2 years experience. Best advice I can ever give to any new programmers is that whatever you make will never be perfect. Don't wait until you have X skillset or understanding before you start your project. Even if you make it shitty the first time you can go back and upgrade and then you're propagating a working mindset instead of "oh I'll start it as soon as I fully understand React". Also, you develop the skillset to see crap code and understand/make it better. Which is way more important to any company than being able to hammer out an app exactly like any bootcamp course.
@@justinwatson146 Any tips you could give me? I've been trying to teach myself programming, but i always end up stopping because i have no idea what to do next or where to even really begin.
@@secretchiley choose what do you like to do the most (check what are the main directions you can go as a programmer, choose 2-4, try each for 1-3 weeks), buy a 10£ course on Udemy (there are a lot of HUGE and good courses, smt like 'complete web dev bootcamp', just sort them by popularity and find a lecturer you like the most), complete that _1_ course. After that you can start thinking about mentoring or payed courses, but don't bother before. GL&HF.
@@secretchiley That depends on what you're intrested in doing. For general purpose programming I'd recommend starting with Python. For web, start with JavaScript (which is NOT related to Java, this was a marketing agreement and nothing else). Once you understand the logic of programming you can pretty easily move to any other language with little effort and learn more of the specifics of what each one excels at. Maybe the exception are data-handling languages like SQL and R (consider taking a look at R if you're intrested in learning Machine Learning / Data Science, as well as the Python libraries). Then, if you care about game development you can learn C++ to work in Unreal, or C# (way easier) to work in Unity. I originally started with C++, but in retrospective, it's like going into preschool where children are learning to count and try to teach them integration because sure, if you can integrate you sure can count. This is all that's wrong with computer science at universities at least in my country.
Edit: Something I forgot: At some point, you'll have the need to introduce asynchronic elements into your software. And you'll not understand how and why they work. But they do. Have faith in them. At some point, it'll click and you'll understand.
Just took an exam that would pretty much determine whether I am able to do undergrad med. I botched it hard and got a terrible score. Despite doing lots of work and trying to get a decent score that would give me somewhat of a chance at getting an interview at the end of the year, I still got a terrible score. I was hoping and praying that I would get a good score, trying to balance so many things in the final year of highschool, particularly last week in which a lot of things came up right before my exam. I tried and stuffed it. I did equally if not a little bit more work than my friend and yet he got a much higher score. I don't understand, it really feels like at times in your life the universe is just against you, no matter what you desire, how hard you work, how much effort you put in, that you will not be rewarded nor gain anything in return. This video has helped me understand that ultimately, the unrealistic lives people portray of success and nothing but success is far from the truth. Behind those successes are failures. For people who haven't experienced failure will experience it eventually, and they won't know how to respond to it. Failure is inevitable, at some point or another people will fail. It comes down to how you respond to that failure and how you grow from it.
How is life with you now?
Sometimes, there is merit to the idea of, “fuck it, do it anyways!”.
I felt numb when he read the reddit post, and after he gave his praise to the decision of the OP and explained further, I broke down 3 times. This helped me understand the importance of growth better than anything else that I've read and heard from all my years of my life. Thank you so much.
I quit applying to jobs because I was discouraged from all the rejections and no-responses.
The past couple of months I've rolled about a hundred dice. Got a 5% hit rate for interviews and got pretty far in a few of them with ultimately no offer.
Still jamming them out and eating all the hits to the ego. I still get nervous and anxious but I'm working through the fear of failure and chugging along.
Update?
I'm currently in my first semester of medical school and there's been times where I've questioned myself and wondered if I have what it takes to finish through. Your videos are not only helpful but very therapeutic and you inspire me to one day do what you do and help others with their struggles. Much love from a future colleague
Yeah bro never give up. I'm about to recieve my score and apply for it in 2 weeks. It looks easy when we see people that already graduated cuz we just look at the results and not at their struggles.
UA-cam can be very toxic in this sense. Same thing as his mountain analogy.
Why make a video if it’s gonna get 5 views.
Keep creating. Whatever way you see fit and then improve with what comes to mind. Harnessing creativity is a duty you have to yourself and to others since no one will create things the way you do. And no one will come close to what you might create in 5, 10, 20+ years down the line with all that built expertise and lived experience. It's not about the views it's about how you view the work.
I don't know how other countries are but I think the issue this guy has comes from the way our school systems and society to some extent work, they value results alot more them effort, evaluation schools favor temporary memory instead of long term, its all about short term goals becasue it all "resets" next year.
True, as Daigo Umehara explains in his book , to improve you have to make very little improvements every day so you can improve over a big period of time.
Daigo my father
Ahh I was really down today after I made myself throw up (for not good reasons) and was feeling like I shouldn't be alive after I got my results that said I failed my math exam even though I did my best. I tried to work hard and concentrate, but I couldn't because I kept getting distracted and daydreaming about the most useless things. The opening tells me you're going to comment on how my hard work mattered so thank you for that :)
Glad that you found Dr K ' video
Take it from 45 year old: There's more to life than math exams. Much more. I've failed entire math classes and it didn't even come close to ruining anything in my life. So be kind to yourself. Know that you did your best. Be proud of yourself for that and know that there's more out there for you. In time, you'll barely even remember tests at all. Anyone who told you test scores were everything was lying to you. I hope you take some time today to practice some self-care. You definitely need it. You are not your grades. You are not your test scores. Your self-worth is a constant regardless of what's happening outside it. You are born with that worth and you will die with just as much, never losing so much as an ounce. Nothing can change your value as a human being. Nothing. Especially math tests.
@@m0L3ify facts
Have you heard of maladative daydreaming? It might be part of your problem and is a form of escapism
@@m0L3ify thank you so much!!
"Whether you think you can, or you think you can't - you're right." -Henry Ford
Whether you write this phrase under every fucking video or you don't, it'll still be there written by 400 different people.
Was just reading about Ford in Think and Grow Rich
@SuperLotus
Think and Grow Rich is all lies. If you want to know the details, Coffeezilla has a very good video breaking it down. It also doesn't fit at all with Dr. K's teachings IMO, although I don't think he's ever specifically talked about Think And Grow Rich. Dr. K's book would be Think, Act, Maybe Grow Rich, Maybe Don't Grow Rich, Accept All Outcomes
@@SuperLotus "growing rich" is still an outcome oriented approach. A more accurate phrase would be "whether you can or you can't, we don't know". What doctor K teaches us here is to do what is within our control, and that is acting, whether those actions will lead to "success" is outside of our control, but acting, learning and improving as human beings is valuable in and of itself, regardless of the outcome.
@@divagaciones1628 I think the title is misleading ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I’m in the process of applying to a Phd program… and I’ve thought for most of my life that I am too “stupid” or not intelligent enough to get in. But it’s really just a self fulfilling prophecy, a mindset I have to change. I’ve been studying for a month to get a good score on my GRE and my math score sucked, so I’m taking it again… and I studied more. I know I have a shot if I keep trying. Wish me luck 👍🏼
How'd it go? (I know, I'm late 😅)
when is dr k gonna talk about sigma male grindsets?
That shit's hilarious.
Dr K has a wife - distraction from the smegma grindset
@@Balloonbot i'm stealing this. smegma male is just too funny.
but for real though, "sigma male grindset" is another example of grifters appropriating a legitimate issue (people lacking purpose and not knowing what to do about it) to pose as gurus and make money off the vulnerable. they're 2021's pickup artists. Hell if you looked hard enough you'd probably find a big overlap between the people peddling PUA "guides" and the people peddling sigma grindset "guides".
You need social connections. Even people like Bill Gates had friends, romantic relationships, teammates, etc.
I needed to hear this today. Absolutely opened my eyes to the kind of perspective shift that I need to keep trying. Thank you.
i legit had tears swelling up, this is something I struggled with for a long time. thank you
So, I flunked outta med school. If I were to apply for conditional readmission, it would mean 2 years of remedial classes and then doing all 4 years. So, 6 years of schooling. I’m not sure that is worth it. I didn’t really wanna do it when I went there the first time.
Part of me though says, “Never give up,” but part of me says, “try something else that plays to your strengths,” but then I remember that like, talent probably isn’t all that relevant for success and playing to what I think my talents are won’t help either.
Right now I’m working as a Gardner and an EMT but I don’t think these jobs can provide me with the income for my long term goals.
Do what makes you happy my dude
If it can be both short term happiness and long term happiness, all the better
Being a doctor is a long-term goal. You will not only be broke, but indebted for a long, long time before your compensation outweighs the input.
if you think talent or inclination have no bearing on success in that field you are absolutely delusional.
It seems like the problem here is not that they're results oriented but that they need those results to be a guaranteed outcome of their actions. If instead they settled for their actions having a probability of producing the results they desire this problem goes away.
There is no difference between being 100% sure of success and being sure 100% sure you have 60% chance of success
@@AnnoyanceHazard I mean it is the same mindset. It's still oriented around success. It sets different bar where you move to action. But when it matters it still results in inaction, because it is perfectionist mind that counts those percentages (and underestimates them)
@@nowydexter13 I never said you have to be 100% sure of a 60% chance of success or anything like that. By probability I mean more that the person has a low to fair amount of confidence that the action will result in the outcome they desire but not that it is certain the the outcome will transpire or that it is definitely the case that there is a certain chance of the outcome transpiring. They need to get away from this certainty trap if they are to move in a better direction.
@@somedude6134 That I agree with. Ideally pursuing the goal would be worth without a need of any results. Goal itself would be just additional prize, something completely optional. With this mindset there would be no failure and no fear of it. So we would not mind even 1% chance of success
I was able to switch to a growth oriented mindset by thinking of my life like an MMO. When I play these MMOs I’m never focused on the result, I’m normally just focused on getting stronger. If I think of my studying like skilling up my knowledge tree, it’s more motivating for me.
I really really needed this, thank you :)
Awesome content today. My dear old dad used to say "do something even if it's wrong." Needless to say, don't take that too far, but he was talking about battling "freeze."
I needed to hear this. We live in a highly results driven world with KPI's, OKR's, and numerous results focussed targets placed on us. It can become overwhelming until you are reminded the world is not in your control, especially when it comes to other people. So much of the results we reap are due to rolling the dice. The KPI's and OKR's matter in the business world but all you can do is the actions that have the most chance of producing the desired result, you cannot control the actual outcome.
The part about focusing on growth instead of goals is actually something I've heard a lot in the fighting game community. One of the most common thing for people to tell new players, or even veterans sometimes is that they should not care about winning, just worry about getting better. Something like, sure you may have just lost 30 games in a row, but if you got punished for constantly jumping and not you're not constantly jumping, then you've learnt something and that's what's important
this channel helped me process my problems and get out of my head so well
a little story if you don't mind;
2 years ago I was entering university, I was dejected and uninterested, couldn't make myself work at university and basically dropped out, well I was still enrolled thankfully since I'm not stupid.
in the autumn I went into a few classes and gave up, only to regret it now when I realized I LOVE studying. I love biology and chemistry, I want to be at the top of my field and provide for my girlfriend. that's what my calling is. This channel's coverage on perfectionism, anxiety and depression helped me so much! I can't thank you enough.
I just finished my first 8 study point course with nearly perfect marks (I'm expected to get 40 study points in 1 year, I got 8 in 2 weeks, WHILE learning everything they taught me)
all I needed was a change of mindset, I went from avoiding work to avoiding leasure.
I went from not working because I won't get an A, to working because I want to increase my % ranking in the population and every single fact I learn contributes to it. I want to be there researching the newest technology with the best laboratory with the highest respect. I want to be that guy. it won't be easy, but I want to get there and go even further
Exactly about the grades vs actually learning information to apply the knowledge in chosen field. It's what motivated me through advanced degree knowing I will have to apply it in my profession.
Uhhh that story was insanely inspirational thank you
So glad I discovered your channel, Dr. K! Thanks for all the work you do.
This is what i'm trying to apply to my life right. Point A and Point B. Start and finish. Especially with fears, the goal is less important than the steps you take. ANY WORK, is better than NO WORK. The focus is not about what i don't do or accomplish, but everything i DID.
I studied 3D Art. So almost everything is based on skills, meaning my art portfolio shows my capability rather than my grades. Back in university, all i focus on was improving my art skills through the homework that i had to do. I wasnt doing homework to get a good grade, i was doing it to fail and learn things and experiment from it. I enjoyed the process and i did what i thought was good and applied the best one that fits, naturally grades came along, i got first in class, when i was first told about it, i didnt really feel much about it as i already feel fulfilled achieving my aims of improving my art skills... thats my definition of capability. So for other kind of studies that relates to grades for evidence of capability.... i guess it kinda make sense for it..? However thats probably one aspect. Like what dr k says, it depends on your definition and perspective. Enjoy the process. Dont stop trying. Be proud of the 90 times failures. Be proud that you never lose hope, and that you acted and do something about it.
well its the same with 3d art, no? I feel like all my art is not good enough (outcome)
@@shu3684 Oh thats true, i was focusing more on the grades and non graded validification of success. Thats true that art (outcome) can stop you from trying too. I guess put the reason for you to keep trying not on the outcome then. Probably on the process, like you enjoy doing it or something along those lines that still unconsciously leads you down a path where your ultimate end goal lies. If it gives more stress than necessary or constantly being reminded of, then ask urself why would you still want to invest time to do this in the first place. Evaluate your capabilities and everything logically to see if it is worth a shot. Sometimes it may takes gut feeling as well. Like you know ure good at a certain thing after a period of time and experiences. Things will not always go as plan becus of circumstantial factors, but you can look inwards at ownself to decide it. For me i just enjoy the process even though it was hard work. I found something that i am comfortable with to work hard for and to try more and learn more. The outcome ( good art) is the by product of what i was focusing on which is learning more and understanding my art. It wasnt my focus from the start. I enjoy the process of learning and listening to explanations and tutorials and admiring the the brush strokes and the theories and construction of art. I find it meaningful and soulful. So i kept doing it. I dont mind failing for it. I get a good gut feeling it may turn out better if i tried this and that. Its progressive and with abit more time comes insights and you will find the answer whether to go for it or not. Worth it or not.
Thanks Dr. K. I needed to this today. Have a good day!
I really needed this, I am 25 years old and currently doing my MBA and I am not sure whether it will bring any good results still I am definitely going to try my best cause that is what I have control over. I will save this video and watch it every morning.
This is a super good video illustrating the importance of hard work and trying to achieve things in life. So many people just look at the winners in life but forget the sacrifices and work they put in to get to that position.
I just found you recently at a time I think I really needed every single word you say! Thank you so much Dr. K
Love the dice analogy, keep rolling
This is exactly what I needed to hear! Thank you so much! You are doing a great service with these videos!
Following this channel is one of the most beneficial things I've done for my life in the last several years.
Man…Thank you. Did not know I needed this today, but I did.
As you said, all we can do is try! With that in mind, Dr.K, I would love to have a conversation with you on my podcast. You have inspired me and have taught me a lot about my own cognitive incapacities & have helped in my ability to resolve my enmities. It would be my greatest pleasure to discuss Psychology, the East vs the West, and philosophy. Dhanyavad
As a guy applying to medical school right now, I hope I get in on the first try
I'm waiting for the entrance exam results for med school in my country, god I hope I make it, I'm so fucked if I don't
Hope both of you get in! ♥️
I got my results from the entrance exam yesterday and I passed it. I hope you guys will succeed as well!
me too 18000 applicants 1700 places, I'm praying
It took me two cycles to get in, bro. If you don't get in, that's not the end of it. Just come back stronger. And just so you know, at my school a very large proportion (maybe even the majority) are reapplications or non-traditional. If you take a gap year to boost your MCAT or research or whatever, adcoms don't care very much. As long as you show you were grinding during that year, you're good.
Oh my god. This is amazing. Thank you for this.
You always give me hope in this life with your encouragement, thank you
Thanks for the video, Dr. K
Knowing the odds is far better than giving life to the grind. I was in school got set up with a bad professor for 2 of my classes, I got snowed in for 2 weeks and the deadline for dropping the class was over and I did not want to pay for dropping. So I ended up going and over that time I had a breakdown and a massive change in the outlook of my life, boy how I wish I just dropped the class and paid the bill. For, pushing the stone up the hill is strong, but walking around it is wise.
Balance is the key
Thanks Dr. K, needed this today
I didn't know I needed this video. Thank you, Dr. K.
That Genshin analogy made me laugh out loud 😅 gonna have to use that one. Love the content Dr. K. Keep it up :)
Well as a 3.2 GPA in High school, I focus myself on only subjects that would achieve my dream as a computer science student like Math, Chemistry, and other science classes and suprisingly I got accepted to a Computer science University.
I'm preparing to become a civil servant and in my country that requieres to pass a selection process, including exams. And not only that, depending on what marks you get you chose first what position you get (within your field) and where. So it's a very competitive, results oriented enviroment. And it sucks, there's no other way to put it.
As someone currently applying to medical school and getting increasingly discouraged and disillusioned, thanks for this. Can't control what happens afterward, but I can control whether or not I finish these apps.
I love Dr K's casual look the best
For the people who struggle with a result-focused mind and want to look at life action-oriented, there is definitely a trap in viewing being action-oriented as a result. In viewing action-orientation as a result in your mind then chasing it, you will only get headaches and headaches and headaches (speaking from personal experience here). Forcibly trying to make that work through determination is not the way. Being result-focused and viewing the act of meditation resulted in me being unable to meditate. For meditation is an act. I also viewed awareness as some goal and that once I get it, I would be able to meditate and that's just not how it works. As far as I know, I can switch to action-orientation mentally but I do not know how to explain the steps in switching from result to action focus. I can only shed light on this trap for now (first sentence).
Would hope to see some Q & A on stuff like this. This somewhat relates to the mind, meditation stuff and I think it would be a really valuable asset for HG have some mental/mind/meditation "common problems", like for meditation, they address what tension during a headache is, why meditation doesn't work for many (which can be a variety of many things).
Hard work only matters if you actually care about the thing you are doing, otherwise you will just create a prison of your own success and you'll be stuck working hard on something you don't care about.
@@jadedbreadncircus9159 To each their own but if you make a bunch of money doing things you hate doing, then your gonna get trapped because you'll be too scared to walk away from the money, you get stuck in a loop. People just chase money into an early grave.
@@isaaccardin2535 that advice is only useful once someone’s basic needs are met. By his post, he would’ve been better off going to school/getting trained in something
@@jadedbreadncircus9159 yeah most people in the arts don’t make enough to live off of, but we only hear about the ones that do. It’s called survivors bias because the media only likes to cover the few who took big risks and were successful instead of the masses who tried and failed
Dr. K your videos have are eye opening and extremely helpful. Could you please explain what you did after being rejected by several medical schools and you're you eventually got into med school
Damn i needed this ive been failing this certification exam twice now and im afraid to fail the next. Im so exhausted Ive been studying for hours.
I understand the need to act despite failure. What I want to know is how to get the motivation necessary to act. My desire is strong but my fear still paralyzes me.
needed this
While yes, your hard work is what matters, the steps you take and what you learn from them, that you shouldn't look at that top, but at the progress you make, what sucks is when you fail and you feel your hard work, what you've done, was for nothing. I'm 23 and still living with my parents, dad is working abroad because he makes more money there and this has been going on for almost 10 years. I've been in college for 5 years now because I chose to go because I thought it was going to be the better path for me to have a better future (getting a degree and all that), and I'm also trying to get my driver's license. I should've finished college at least 2 years ago, haven't been able to do it because unfortunately 1 class with 1 subject has been my Achile's heel for this long, have been struggling with it and just can't get over it, have tried many ways to help me, none have worked, my mental state, my drive, the person I was 5 years ago, gone, because I keep focusing on the result. Driver's license? Haven't finished it yet because I unfortunately fail the driving exam because 1 small hiccup and I get nervous and botch it.
And then I come to my parents, tell them I failed despite trying very hard to succeed, I studied, I tried remaining calm, and it still wasn't enough but i don't want to give up, and what do I hear from them? You failed because you didn't try hard enough, you failed because you are not focused, you failed because you don't care, while they at the same time tell me to not think of them, to stay calm, to not worry about it.
Just how in the hell can someone focus on the path and not the end goal, when every single time you trip on the path you get told that what you're doing is just not enough? At this point I even think that going to college 5 years ago was a mistake because I look back now, see this wide eyed young guy who was passionate and eager, and now I look at myself, a husk of who I used to be. I want to go back to being that guy, but I feel like I'm too beaten up and tired.
This video goes hand in hand with his motivation video. Don’t think about anything besides today’s goals.
Edit: The Gambler Black is now officially the strongest god in DND LOL.
truee and it will make more sense if you watch it after the motivation video
This was such a good video.
Thank you. Thank you for so very aptly putting this video out today as I am churning out secondaries for my nth attempt at applying to med schools. The grind has been so real, so exhausting, and so existentially challenging, but this today gave me more strength to continue. Finding that intrinsic motivation during a long grind can be exhausting. I needed this today.
This appeared on my yt recommendation at such a good time istg and i was just thinking abt how i should stop caring abt the outcome and focus on just studying today tho I was a little unsure abt this thought this video really helped me sort out my thoughts
This is such a good video!
Great lesson. We're always taught that the outcome is all that matters and our value as human beings is always measured by the outcome. How much money do I have? what's my position within my company? what degrees do I have? these are the things that are constantly used to measure and evaluate us, but the truth is that we have very little control over those things. What we should really be asking ourselves is "what can I do at this very moment to grow as a person?" and then do it. Our actions are the only thing under our control, and thus the only thing with which we should measure ourselves, not their outcome.
I learned a lot from this vid, make me much happier too.
The personally exciting child-like feelings you get from doing something big is the most overlooked; being why people struggle so much.
-In music, it can be the sweet melodies
-In art, it can be the exciting worlds you love to create most
-In Accounting, it can be the high interest in economy logistics or simply luxurious themes
-In game creation, it can be to simulate the most fascinating things about life or what life could be
-In cooking, it can be to see people enjoy your ideas or to enjoy the hot steamy professional chef vibe in the kitchen
Our passions consist of so many enjoying feelings that contribute to our persistence, and the rest of the world sees it exclusively as a hardworking, money chaser kind of persistence which I think causes most of our misery and confusion.
As someone who's preparing to apply for med school in about a year or two, this was really helpful.
Man thanks for this. Preparing for an entrance exam for my masters but was really demotivated considering the competition in my country.
Man this was great.
Epic Buff Sir!
I relate to this alot, I was getting rejected from jobs quite a bit following undergrad and felt lost and then decided to pursue a masters which i completed and then ended up in the same situation. I became depressed and hopeless about my life for a while even to the point just letting time pass by. I am now pursuing other things and i even panicked by trying too many different things at once in order to be successful in my own and family’s eyes. Right now im doing better but its a long road im on and ahead but im feeling hopeful.
Great work Dr keep up , your stream is just amazing , can you talk about some ADHD stuff and neurodivergency in general
Lovely man
Yooo that Genshin Impact mindset!!. Grinding for artifacts everyday for content that doesnt exist yet.
Holy moly... The title, gave me goosebumps!
Edit: its been 2 minutes into video, my goosebumps aren't going away. Maybe, I'm gonna have goosebumps throughout this video. This is fricking awesome!
Reminds me of a quote from Les Brown:
"Do what you can, where you are, with what you have, and never be satisfied."
9/22/21 Edit:
Third time revisiting this video. First time was absorbing, second time was with note taking. This time around I’m trying to get through my analysis paralysis where I’ve been offered a job with good opportunities but high stress and low pay.
As Dr. K says and as is what I am trying to turn into one of my mantras: I have no control over the results, only my actions. I have no control over whether or not I will be of a similar personality to my coworkers, I have no control over how stressful the job will be, I have no control over whether or not this job will just plain work out for me- whether it will make me miserable like previous jobs, or whether it will help me and my personal and professional growth immensely.
And so, my analysis paralysis says: “It might not work, so why even try?”
Dr. K’s advice says: “You are correct. It might not work. Which is precisely why you should try.”
I do not control my results.
I only control my actions.
Success is usually measured in monetary climb/ status.
That is the most common way for people to think about success.
But success can be so much more.
To me true success is the moment when you truly know yourself, a moment that most people never see.
Success is being completely comfortable failing at whatever it is you are doing.
Because that is the only real way to reach excellence in whatever it is you try to accomplish.
Don't want to achieve anything special in life?
Fine, don't but don't be an idiot and complain about it.
Just accept that by doing nothing for "reasons", you effectively commit to the bottom part of the hierarchy that is society.
Which is completely fine, only if you do not blame it on stuff.
You're right, I'm gonna apply for that Google internship and I'm be frickin proud of it
Steve Rogers didn't become Captain America, without applying 5 times under different names until a man saw the potential in him 👍
I love the first captain America
And also some good ol' giga steroids
Remember that, statistically, anything that can possibly happen will happen given infinite time. And the things we're after are generally not that unlikely.
Would love to see you and Tom Bilyeu have a talk.
man how can i have this mindset that Dr.K have ?? .. that's a success to me
10:33 when he said that I got scared for a second, because I play the game while listening to his videos
SAME
Same as the mountain analogy, I always thought why should I put in effort to learn a music instrument if I won't be able to reach its expert level
I want a hug from this guy
"If you roll the dice enough, generally speaking, things will come in your favor."
Not if you keep rolling crit fail after crit fail and eventually your dice break.
i know this is going to sound repetitive but keep rolling despite the crit-fails - trust me, i've felt the exact same way on numerous occasions
Keep rolling till we roll into the grave.
Try experimenting with techniques, give it a push in a slightly different angles, it might not end up in results but will surely end up in a beautiful place. Take a break when ur stressed, keep annealing so you won't crack.
@@brajat5538 everyone cracks, One way or other and we don't live forever.
Sometimes when one set of dice keeps failing, we need a new set of dice before the crit success' come rolling in
As an athlete, I identify with this wholeheartedly. I used to only play matches against people I was relatively sure I was going to beat. I ended up with unbridled anxiety at the thought of losing a match. I finally realized that the game ITSELF is the goal. Winning is just a bonus. I learned to enjoy PLAYING more than winning. My anxiety evaporated.
7:44 let go of success. Lol this is the same message I’ve been getting. From life circumstances, hamzas video etc.
Just do. Don’t do bc of getting the job. Or etc. just everyday ask yourself am I going to study today. Am I going to apply for jobs today.
8:26 as a human being you are not entitled to the fruits of your actions. All you are entitled to is actions. You don’t get to control results. All you get to control is actions.
10:19 keep trying. Keep rolling the dice. You literally just have to keep trying. Keep doing.
12:28 if you want to take control of your life you have to stop letting external circumstances dictate your actions. Controlling your life is about acting. You have to do.
I love you Dr. K.
How do I tilt the possibility of success in my favor?
I know the first step is to try and get things done. But like which things should be done to get closer to the outcome effectively? Like seriously, I wish they taught this in school.
Instead of thinking in terms of did I succeed or not at this big thing, one could think of it as a probability, e.g. 1%, then ask how you can improve that chance to 2%. That may be somewhat subjective, but it is an interesting way of framing the path forward.
One can search for a list of ideas that would help, then one can rate them based on how much of a percentage increase one hypothesizes would work.
Thank you so much sir.