YOU GET OFFENDED YOU LOSE

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 18 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,8 тис.

  • @ZeducationTyler
    @ZeducationTyler  8 місяців тому +185

    Goooood Mernin!

    • @anarchistscum6090
      @anarchistscum6090 8 місяців тому +4

      I turned 25 yesterday. At this point I feel like all eternity and a single moment are on in the same.

    • @reginagilby1101
      @reginagilby1101 8 місяців тому +6

      12:30 am in Aussie land 😎🇦🇺 but anyhow good mernin America

    • @jedison0311
      @jedison0311 8 місяців тому +8

      Mernin from Kenai Alaska

    • @JSFGuy
      @JSFGuy 8 місяців тому +4

      ​@@anarchistscum6090 🙋🏻 11th bday also. ,🍻

    • @specialsmithchick
      @specialsmithchick 8 місяців тому +3

      I was unsubscribed again. I have to check daily.

  • @JinxdCrow
    @JinxdCrow 8 місяців тому +952

    Zed in our defense the last time we made a decision on where to eat, we got mankind kicked out of Eden. 4:43

    • @nozrep
      @nozrep 8 місяців тому +55

      😂😂😂😂

    • @mommawant9989
      @mommawant9989 8 місяців тому +47

      Good one 😂😂😂

    • @emilydickey5990
      @emilydickey5990 8 місяців тому +32

      Hahaha cute

    • @V0ltron
      @V0ltron 8 місяців тому +27

      Hear hear! 👏

    • @patc4586
      @patc4586 8 місяців тому +28

      Because she didn't feel like cooking.

  • @mbourque
    @mbourque 8 місяців тому +269

    23:19
    women won't accept a guy under 6 foot, when height can't be changed, BUT get mad when men say that don't want a fat girl, when weight CAN be changed....

    • @louettesommers8594
      @louettesommers8594 8 місяців тому +14

      My wonderful husband of 45 years was only 5ft5. There are many many men who are taller but NOT a bigger than he was.
      I agree with your comment. 💜

    • @_Mamimi
      @_Mamimi 8 місяців тому +23

      My husband is 5’9. Only ugly women demand the 6 foot crap

    • @MiniLemmy
      @MiniLemmy 8 місяців тому +16

      Height is not an issue if he’s rich (apparently)

    • @tarrantwolf
      @tarrantwolf 8 місяців тому +7

      ​@@MiniLemmyevery digit after 5 adds 3 inches in height value

    • @blingbling574
      @blingbling574 8 місяців тому +3

      Just had a discussion today about the long term effects of waman eating poorly. There's this young woman in her prime who put on 50 or so pounds during the pandemic. She went from a 7 down to a 4. Sad, I still like her.

  • @andyroo7206
    @andyroo7206 8 місяців тому +191

    You gotta add Canada to that tax map! Everything here is busted (including our PM) yet we keep dishing out money to the government to give to other countries.

    • @Ryo7_7
      @Ryo7_7 8 місяців тому

      Castreau is holding Canada hostage it looks like.

    • @MykeLewisMusic
      @MykeLewisMusic 8 місяців тому +12

      And people here cheer it on for some reason.

    • @Daniel-nr2uf
      @Daniel-nr2uf 8 місяців тому +7

      @@MykeLewisMusicSheeple

    • @davebeech236
      @davebeech236 8 місяців тому +18

      And the UK!

    • @n4ughty_knight
      @n4ughty_knight 8 місяців тому

      All marxist influenced governments tax the shit out of society.

  • @punkr0ckgurl75
    @punkr0ckgurl75 8 місяців тому +20

    I have blue hair, I’ve had crazy hair since the 90s. I am not woke. I am not a Karen. I was just an old school punk who understood the corruption of the system and used small gestures to rebel. I also worked all my life and raised a great kid with manners and respect. He’s a gm of a restaurant and people adore him bc he is kind and sensible. What I see happening now is depressing and sad. The state of the world and the entitlement of people especially kids today is astounding! I’ve never been a conservative but I’ve jumped ship in light of the insanity happening now.

    • @FiglioBastardo
      @FiglioBastardo 8 місяців тому

      Maybe you should consider going natural now?

  • @UnscrupulousAgitator
    @UnscrupulousAgitator 8 місяців тому +145

    Good morning all 🙂
    Time to go to work
    To pay our taxes
    To support everyone but ourselves

    • @sarahmostacci1154
      @sarahmostacci1154 8 місяців тому +3

      Is t that the truth! I hope that this changes this year, we can only hope that everyone else opens their eyes to see what’s happening.

    • @chrissymodo
      @chrissymodo 8 місяців тому +3

      The UK is worse mate

    • @richardmead5969
      @richardmead5969 8 місяців тому +1

      true

    • @richardmead5969
      @richardmead5969 8 місяців тому

      for sure@@chrissymodo

    • @lorireed8046
      @lorireed8046 8 місяців тому +3

      I'm here just to say I had a 24 hours ban for "bullying" .... When that was over I was hit with a scammer ban while ON the first ban. LOL 🤣🤣🤣
      Funny how that works and zero ability to question it or fight it. UA-cam is salty AsF.

  • @gordonhill5431
    @gordonhill5431 8 місяців тому +14

    The shrinkage screwdriver got me good. 😂

  • @purplelove392
    @purplelove392 8 місяців тому +25

    Barry's 60 year superspreader birthday bash was a Jeff's plane reunion party.

  • @txx9815
    @txx9815 8 місяців тому +40

    If you can't order a black coffee, you probably can't order straight whiskey either.😁

    • @FiglioBastardo
      @FiglioBastardo 8 місяців тому

      🤣 How dare you assume the whiskey's sexual preference!

    • @pineappleparty1624
      @pineappleparty1624 8 місяців тому +1

      I never understood people that drink. Why pay the price of a bottle for one tiny glass(shot) at a bar? It's not like it tastes better there. It's not like it's 5 star restaurant food you cant cook at home.

  • @rufus5966
    @rufus5966 8 місяців тому +51

    Residential Maintenance Supervisor = I mow my neighbor's lawn.

  • @melanied2989
    @melanied2989 8 місяців тому +35

    After watching this(Canadian here), I asked my husband “in French, everything is masculine or feminine. How do you speak French non-binary?” lol

    • @Andreseme23
      @Andreseme23 7 місяців тому

      I don’t know in French, but in Spanish, non binary people are literally trying to change the entire language so it “includes” them.
      In many Spanish speaking countries our useless politicians have even made laws to use a new gender neutral version of any word related to people. It’s insane.

  • @lemonyskunkketts7781
    @lemonyskunkketts7781 8 місяців тому +353

    Blue hair, green hair, orange hair, pink hair, bull nose rings, fat acceptance, all things that are no one wants to look at.

    • @ericortega1745
      @ericortega1745 8 місяців тому

      My cousin took a graduation photo with blue hair and a bull nose ring. She looks so stupid, bless her heart 😂

    • @theLadyjensen
      @theLadyjensen 8 місяців тому +14

      Colored hair is pretty, as long as they aren’t crazy. I’ve had my hair pink for over a decade (my dad likes it) 🤷🏼‍♀️

    • @PruneHub
      @PruneHub 8 місяців тому +36

      @@theLadyjensen Your dad is protecting your feelings (by lying.)

    • @TheAnimeist
      @TheAnimeist 8 місяців тому +13

      @@theLadyjensen If he likes it, see if he'll color his hair.

    • @jasondadudetoo4176
      @jasondadudetoo4176 8 місяців тому +16

      ​@@theLadyjensencolored hair is pretty like poison arrow frogs. Like bright colors are nice to look at from a distance but you know the thing that is bright colored is extremely toxic. And every other man knows exactly how your dad feels. He's trying not to hurt your feelings. But in the process you have hurt his feelings.

  • @TripleCrossProduct
    @TripleCrossProduct 8 місяців тому +6

    That last one, is a good way to spark up a conversation.

  • @WiscoBoundTrucker
    @WiscoBoundTrucker 8 місяців тому +43

    5:26 I worked for a place when I was a teen where I'd fold up boxes and such for shipping items. I would tell people I was a compressed fiberboard technician 😆🤣😆🤣

  • @Huldah4cs
    @Huldah4cs 8 місяців тому +34

    Been married a loooooong time. When we were dating he would either say: “I don’t have enough money for both of us to eat and I am starved” or I would say: “How about Chinese or Mexican or Thai.” Then we would go eat BBQ every…single…time…and that is how you stay married for a very looooong time.

  • @zombiebassman
    @zombiebassman 8 місяців тому +181

    17:16 my kid got in serious trouble for selling his Halloween candy and lunch snacks at school. Like some of these dumb kids were buying snack cakes from him for like 5 bucks each. The school was mad. I was impressed.

    • @debby8428
      @debby8428 8 місяців тому +20

      same with my kids. they bought candy bars from a big box store and sold them for a profit. even the teachers were buying. but then someone turned them in and they had to stop.

    • @TheStarshipGarage
      @TheStarshipGarage 8 місяців тому +18

      Hey, they're just businessman, these kids are learning economics

    • @markmurex6559
      @markmurex6559 8 місяців тому +14

      Smart kid.

    • @DaveSmith-cp5kj
      @DaveSmith-cp5kj 8 місяців тому

      The argument for stopping it is to prevent people from exploiting kids to make money, but then the schools immediately have kids go door to door to sell things to strangers in order to make the school money.

    • @MOE-db8oc
      @MOE-db8oc 8 місяців тому +21

      Well, they learned a real life lesson. If the powers that be (government) catches you doing well for yourself and they don’t get their cut, they will shut you down.

  • @martinblank6623
    @martinblank6623 8 місяців тому +27

    They're not trying to buy off foreign counties, they're laundering money for kickbacks.

    • @ProudCanadian1959
      @ProudCanadian1959 7 місяців тому

      Been saying that since the Ukraine came crying for money.

  • @nco_gets_it
    @nco_gets_it 8 місяців тому +39

    I don't swear as much as I used to...but I find myself rolling my eyes a lot at work...maybe I need an eye roll jar...LOL

    • @margimackowski-seif9305
      @margimackowski-seif9305 8 місяців тому +2

      You need the coffee up that says, "I'm sorry. Did I roll my eyes at you out loud?"

    • @kathybost1879
      @kathybost1879 8 місяців тому

      I never swore until the vegetable landed in the WH.

    • @markusgorelli5278
      @markusgorelli5278 8 місяців тому

      I did troubleshooting over the phone for a while. We once discussed whether it was better to be there in person. I said there are plusses, but then I wouldn't be able to roll my eyes when I wanted to. 🤣

  • @j.r.9879
    @j.r.9879 8 місяців тому +27

    6:35 just give me my black coffee without the stupidity.

    • @jp-ty1vd
      @jp-ty1vd 8 місяців тому +2

      way back when I used to go to Fartbucks, I would ask for a large coffee and listen to the "barista" take 5 minutes trying to talk me into ordering a "grande".

  • @jimreilly917
    @jimreilly917 8 місяців тому +122

    Zed, as a Nigerian Princess I’m offended that you think our royal family would scam anyone. Here in Nigeria we make the best flashlights. US special forces use them Thy can burn through metal. Send me $500 for your own.

    • @ontheroad5317
      @ontheroad5317 8 місяців тому +36

      I’m glad to hear you’re from the royal family, maybe you can help me.
      6 months ago, I sent you the $3000 in order to cover the costs of the bank transfers. But I still haven’t received the $14,000,000 that I inherited. I tried to email that nice financial officer, Joseph, but he hasn’t replied. I assume he must be out sick. Any assistance you can give me is appreciated.

    • @Kshthymyla
      @Kshthymyla 8 місяців тому

      @@ontheroad5317@jimreilly917 Please also let Joseph know that I’ve been trying to reach him about his camel’s extended warranty.

    • @jimreilly917
      @jimreilly917 8 місяців тому +23

      @@ontheroad5317 🤣on it’s way.🤡

    • @ontheroad5317
      @ontheroad5317 8 місяців тому

      @@jimreilly917 phew, I’m relieved, thanks!

    • @Eaglemadhatter
      @Eaglemadhatter 8 місяців тому +2

      What's the telegram to send the money's?

  • @rdmineer1
    @rdmineer1 8 місяців тому +18

    We've been driving under a subscription service for 100 years; tags, insurance, license, parking permit and parking meters.

  • @specialsmithchick
    @specialsmithchick 8 місяців тому +34

    Delicate white fish with pasta in a light, white sauce.
    It was tuna casserole.

  • @jonnel50505
    @jonnel50505 8 місяців тому +25

    Amazon should ask: Do you have your husbands consent to make this purchase?

  • @michaellowe3665
    @michaellowe3665 8 місяців тому +138

    Funny thing, if the blue haired barista is trans, they are also called "milkless".

    • @HubertofLiege
      @HubertofLiege 8 місяців тому +26

      May contain nuts

    • @cathoderaytube7497
      @cathoderaytube7497 8 місяців тому +7

      ​@@HubertofLiege Not necessarily, especially for the guys😂.

    • @ankavoskuilen1725
      @ankavoskuilen1725 8 місяців тому +2

      Interesting! So basically, when you order a milkless coffee, the barista gets offended?

    • @hollyberry2752
      @hollyberry2752 8 місяців тому +1

      😅🤣😂🤣

    • @jovalleau
      @jovalleau 8 місяців тому

      EEeeewwwwwww.
      Like.

  • @jjc4577
    @jjc4577 8 місяців тому +15

    the 12% of beef stat just tells me we need more cattle ranches.

  • @joebright4607
    @joebright4607 8 місяців тому +27

    Zed, they have breathalyzers for engine ignition. If we could attach them to phones the internet would calm down a good bit.

  • @ncamon
    @ncamon 8 місяців тому +12

    My girl not only always knows where she wants to eat, but also will always order something anyplace we go.

  • @V0ltron
    @V0ltron 8 місяців тому +227

    Here in SC we just passed Constitutional Carry, but each county has to have two mandatory training classes each month for people who choose to take it. But EVERY resident must now pay taxes, whether people choose the training or not. I thought it was a basic right to defend yourself. Then again having clean drinking water and oxygen to breathe is a bsic right, yet the government regulates those too... weird, huh???

    • @Ryo7_7
      @Ryo7_7 8 місяців тому +24

      They don't want law abiding citizens to live apparently.

    • @V0ltron
      @V0ltron 8 місяців тому

      ​@@Ryo7_7it's F'd up. The government basically saying : "yes you have the right to defend yourself and loved ones and property, to drink clean water and breath fresh air.... but you gotta pay me for it."

    • @ducewags
      @ducewags 8 місяців тому +23

      @V0ltron Todays fun fact, The government never gave any person any right's, but it can sure take them away, or tax them.
      Don't worry the taxes will get sent to other parts of Earth to a person, to do a thing.

    • @blakebryan865
      @blakebryan865 8 місяців тому +5

      I am in Charleston, my hubby has had conceal carry for years now but he hasn’t mentioned any of this. I will have to check our county. Thanks

    • @nozrep
      @nozrep 8 місяців тому +14

      right. correct. So it is your Constitutional duty to carry anyway, and your natural, inalienable, God given right to not follow those things that they attached to it. What you described of course is not actually Constitional carry. So stop calling it that, also, maybe.

  • @toddmichael4271
    @toddmichael4271 8 місяців тому +10

    That last Air Force ad is a hot subject that’s burning up the internet.

    • @aaronwinter447
      @aaronwinter447 8 місяців тому +1

      Im out of the loop and dont know what is going on. what happened?
      (EDIT: Nvermind Oh no! Air force member set himself on fire!?)

    • @ameliashostak4764
      @ameliashostak4764 3 місяці тому +1

      @@aaronwinter447 I'm late to the party and am watching some of these now older episodes, I also had NO Idea what the heck that was about, so I'm looking in the comments, lol. YOU are the only one who answered that for me, so thank you!

  • @tikibomber
    @tikibomber 8 місяців тому +68

    Many European Languages are gendered (NOT BINARY OR NON-BINARY) and the gendering of a language is not just limited to Spanish.

    • @tamsolo1584
      @tamsolo1584 8 місяців тому +1

      That would confuse most of them 😂😂😂

    • @melanied2989
      @melanied2989 8 місяців тому +6

      After watching this(Canadian here), I asked my husband “in French, everything is masculine or feminine. How do you speak French non-binary?” lol

    • @matthewreynolds8025
      @matthewreynolds8025 8 місяців тому +2

      Old English was gendered. Masculine, feminine or neuter. stopped using gendered language during the middle English period.

    • @skeptigal4626
      @skeptigal4626 8 місяців тому

      German has feminine, masculine and neuter.

    • @michaelbarnes7351
      @michaelbarnes7351 8 місяців тому

      Learn to code, code is binary.

  • @eddrew313
    @eddrew313 8 місяців тому +1

    Loved the show but also wanted to tell you that I just finished "Trailer Park Parable". Not what I expected, much, much, much better. Keep up the great work.
    Your 70+ yo fan, Ed

  • @kpm8879
    @kpm8879 8 місяців тому +25

    I read your book yesterday! SO GOOD! So well written and I cried for you and your brothers and your mama! God has a plan for you and you are bringing laughter to so many now! Thank you!!

  • @skipwalker3269
    @skipwalker3269 8 місяців тому +7

    Steak every meal, lost 55 lbs.

  • @elt.214
    @elt.214 8 місяців тому +23

    I blame Eve on the “woman don’t know where they want to eat” problem. Saw a meme about it and makes total sense. 😂

  • @Pegfoxx
    @Pegfoxx 8 місяців тому +8

    That guy selling cheetos in a bag is a good way to make money. At high school I used to make and sell small chocolate cakes for all the weed smokers lol. I made enough money to buy a Sega Genesis & Sonic the hedgehog, and I sold the cakes for just 2 dollars. The 80s & 90s were the best days of my life!

  • @DantesDarkside
    @DantesDarkside 8 місяців тому +30

    3:52 you can add all western european countries to that map as well, especially Germoney. 355 billion euros into foreign countries, but higher taxes on everything

    • @markmurex6559
      @markmurex6559 8 місяців тому +5

      US, Canada, the UK, Germany, and France.

    • @malumachado4561
      @malumachado4561 8 місяців тому

      Someone from the southern hemisphere here, sadly this is 99% of countries except maybe Switzerland.
      Our civil servants are among the top 10 highest paid in the world and we have close to 60%-70% unemployment. Our government enjoys Dubai's tax laws too 🤡

  • @kingscorpio9536
    @kingscorpio9536 8 місяців тому +3

    15:14 What? Meg! Wake up Meg!!! Where is his on the spot corrections? Help Tyler! 😂😂

  • @heathersimpson672
    @heathersimpson672 8 місяців тому +11

    I’m halfway through your book and shocked at how similar our childhoods were. I love the book so far!

  • @Eaglemadhatter
    @Eaglemadhatter 8 місяців тому +13

    Happily part of the 12% of beef eaters. Had a half pound of ground last night. Steak and eggs today maybe.

    • @paulcallicoat7597
      @paulcallicoat7597 8 місяців тому

      It wouldn't keep me happy. I ate 2#s of beef rib eye and a # of lamb loin chops. I only eat 4 days a week so I pack in up to 4#s of beef and let it digest for 2 days. Is it just coincidental that the 12# is exactly the number of metabolically healthy people that were found in that study of last year? I was just speculating that because I read that 88% of everyone in the USA are considered unhealthy and only 12% healthy.There must be some correlation. At the age of 71 I decided I was going to commit suicide but in a Christian way, not with a gun, so I stopped taking all the medications for blood pressure and cholesterol .Then I only ate the things that all doctors and the FDA Guidelines are telling us will cause strokes and heart attack. Beef/pork and saturated fats and lots of eggs and butter. WTF happened? I should be dead by now at almost 2 years eating this suicide,widow making diet.
      Results: I lost 42#s, normalized my blood pressure and have a resting heart rate of 54 bpm ,no arrhythmia or irregular hb and all arteries are clear. What about all those studies showing that high saturated fats were the cause of stroke and heart attack and all the doctors and talking heads on the tv telling us that low fat and plants were healthy and beef/pork and meat would kill us? According to our government and doctors anyone eating meat was an inconsiderate racist and animal abuser bent on destroying the planet,as well. (How dare you?) If they lied about the meat what else have they lied about? Try finding a rational,healthy vegan who is past 50 yo or any age for that matter. Many exhibit such a level of unhealthy mitochondrial that if they miss a couple meals they have symptoms such as headache, weakness to the point of fainting.They would have trouble walking any distance or exercise any amount. Keep eating beef and supporting our farmers who provide that meat.

  • @LloydMack4
    @LloydMack4 8 місяців тому +60

    So when my wife and I started dating, we went out and she kept saying she didn’t care where we ate, so I went to Taco Bell drive through. Been married now 40 years, and she has always been able to tell me where she would like to have dinner. Problem solved!

    • @mommawant9989
      @mommawant9989 8 місяців тому +6

      You da man! 👍

    • @otpyrcralphpierre1742
      @otpyrcralphpierre1742 8 місяців тому +5

      HEY! Finally, the problem is SOLVED!

    • @richardmead5969
      @richardmead5969 8 місяців тому +2

      true

    • @MOE-db8oc
      @MOE-db8oc 8 місяців тому +5

      Pretty tolerant woman. Surprised you made it to the next date. She is definitely a keeper.

    • @alfredofettuccine9425
      @alfredofettuccine9425 8 місяців тому +1

      Whenever a date tells me she does not know where she wants to eat, I casually mention that I have a coupon for Burger King. Then they decide pretty quick after that…

  • @RJ_MAGA
    @RJ_MAGA 8 місяців тому +2

    3:39.. Those are "impossible" burgers...🤣Impossible to enjoy eating.

  • @MojoMountainMan
    @MojoMountainMan 8 місяців тому +46

    21:10 Fun fact: NOTHING of clothing gets washed when it is given to the Goodwill. It is just taken and put on the shelf AS IT WAS DONATED

    • @teenapittman4241
      @teenapittman4241 8 місяців тому

      I have a small thrift shop and we don’t wash anything. If it smells, has stains or holes, busted seems , is very worn, or has animal hair on it we toss it. We do bag up the unwanted clothing separate from regular trash and people take the bags from our dumpster every day. With the understanding that they can’t scatter it about in the alley. Mostly they just pick up the whole bag and take it with them.

    • @pineappleparty1624
      @pineappleparty1624 8 місяців тому +1

      @@teenapittman4241 why though..? These things *should* be washed. In actual clothing stores the clothes are cleaned before shipping with allergen free soap. It would seem it could, and definitely should be illegal to sell clothes that could be toxic to people...

    • @jayhuff239
      @jayhuff239 8 місяців тому

      Why not be an intelligent adult and wash the stuff before you donate it.

    • @pineappleparty1624
      @pineappleparty1624 8 місяців тому

      @@jayhuff239 Again, allergies. Your flowery detergent doesn't work for everyone. i know the thrift store in my area even repairs clothing. I'm going to ask if they ever wash something. if NO, then they do not deserve business at all.

    • @MojoMountainMan
      @MojoMountainMan 8 місяців тому

      @@jayhuff239 99% of people do. That's why they all look clean in there. Workers at the outlets throw away stuff that looks dirty.

  • @brucejane7395
    @brucejane7395 8 місяців тому +4

    That’s why I only buy bread with seeds on crust. I take the seeds and plant my own bread.

  • @johhanwindsalor9478
    @johhanwindsalor9478 8 місяців тому +10

    The last one took me a second... and then, like an old flame... it burned bright in my memory!

    • @markcameron9410
      @markcameron9410 8 місяців тому +1

      Zeds stunned silence on that one made me laugh just as hard as the meme 😂😂😂

  • @andrewchristiansen8311
    @andrewchristiansen8311 8 місяців тому +3

    16:45 34 years old can confirm. @ 30 years old my peptic ulcers combined & formed a duodenal hemorrhage. Hemoglobin was 6 (15-18 Normal). I had 4 inches of my stomach cut out. They said I almost bled out in my sleep & required 2 transfusions before surgery. This is what 70+ hour work weeks, eating out daily, & never getting 5 hours sleep a day does to you. Drank 6 liters of Cola a day. Weigh 130lb 5'9.

  • @jackiec498
    @jackiec498 8 місяців тому +17

    "I post the memes because I'm unhappy, and I'm unhappy because I post the memes..." 😂

  • @frankdelarosa6461
    @frankdelarosa6461 8 місяців тому +16

    An old man thought I had a Trump cap today. He didn’t like it. It was a grey Texas Ranger ball cap. Insane! The letter T is upsetting people.

    • @kj7792
      @kj7792 8 місяців тому +2

      🤬🤬🤬 wow!! Where do you live. Be careful TDS is real😮

    • @blameyourmamma
      @blameyourmamma 8 місяців тому +6

      I usually respect my elders, but you should've told that old man to mind his own fuckn business.

    • @FiglioBastardo
      @FiglioBastardo 8 місяців тому

      TDS is set to plaid folks....

    • @ConservativeGrouch
      @ConservativeGrouch 7 місяців тому

      @@blameyourmamma At an event that involved beer and socializing, I was hanging with a couple of my bros in the large parking lot, roped off for the afternoon. A short fatty waddled over to where we were seated and demanded to know what we were talking about. I asked her why she thought she needed to know, which started a curt exchange, her demanding to know why I was there. I just started stonewalling until she just threw up her hands and waddled away. I should have told her I was a pimp on the lookout for new "talent" but that she wasn't up to standards.

    • @Meh-j9s
      @Meh-j9s 4 місяці тому

      Fuck em

  • @presidenttomato816
    @presidenttomato816 8 місяців тому +14

    Thankfully, my youngest daughter, being my daughter and raised primarily by me, knows exactly where she wants to eat on a daily basis! I know because she ALWAYS tells me EVERY DAY! 😂🤣

  • @the_rachel_sam
    @the_rachel_sam 8 місяців тому +3

    That one girl KNEW she wanted Wingstop lol

  • @Mr.Ramrodmagatron
    @Mr.Ramrodmagatron 8 місяців тому +13

    Just learning now you are having another baby, congratulations, brother. That's awesome 👌 🎉😮

    • @jp-ty1vd
      @jp-ty1vd 8 місяців тому

      7 more and you can start your very own girls softball team!

  • @razorsedge5145
    @razorsedge5145 8 місяців тому

    I always lose these challenges. Not so much of the videos, but because of Tyler's reactions.
    Keep 'em coming, Tyler.

  • @monkeybird69
    @monkeybird69 8 місяців тому +23

    @12:38 next big thing... cannibal leader in Haiti, named Barbeque, getting the thumbs up from celebrities wearing t-shirts that say "Haiti is already great"

  • @dinkul903
    @dinkul903 8 місяців тому +72

    Fathers: Not only should you protect your daughter from blue hair, also consider the pig rings worn in the nose.

    • @crazysilly2914
      @crazysilly2914 8 місяців тому +6

      I call them snot rings.

    • @crazysilly2914
      @crazysilly2914 8 місяців тому +4

      I also call them “I’m Not a virgin rings"

    • @analyticalmind4493
      @analyticalmind4493 8 місяців тому

      ​@@crazysilly2914rings don't plug holes.

    • @crazysilly2914
      @crazysilly2914 8 місяців тому +1

      @@analyticalmind4493 you don’t get what it means lol

    • @analyticalmind4493
      @analyticalmind4493 8 місяців тому

      @@crazysilly2914 Oh, I know exactly what it means. It's also a reference to the fact that married people still sleep around.

  • @EastwoodHilfiger
    @EastwoodHilfiger 8 місяців тому +14

    when I first saw that picture of the clowns in the train station with the caption 'Members of congress on their way to the capitol' at 10:22, I thought it looked like York station in the UK. (I grew up in York and visited that station many times!)
    On closer inspection (the sign on the right of the picture particularly!) told me it is in York. So that means those congressmen not only have a long way to go, but are even on the wrong continent! SMH!

    • @deusvolt2146
      @deusvolt2146 8 місяців тому

      Spoiler....memes aren't real !

  • @Fiery154
    @Fiery154 8 місяців тому +6

    It’s not that I don’t know where I want to eat, it’s that I’ve been conditioned to not respond.
    Forever getting shut down.

  • @judierenfrow8073
    @judierenfrow8073 8 місяців тому +20

    After 40 years of marriage, my hubs no longer asks me where I want to eat. Here’s why. “ Where do yo want to eat? Me: Carlotta’s. Hubs: How about X, Y or Z? Me: Don’t ever ask me again!

  • @caniswolf3394
    @caniswolf3394 8 місяців тому +5

    Zed; "I have 1 daughter and another one on the way. I hope they will be okay."
    Father of his own daughters; "Get a gun and learn how to use it."
    Zed; "I'm an Air Force Veteran"
    Father of his own daughters; "Like I said, get a gun and learn how to use it."

    • @terryruggiero1718
      @terryruggiero1718 8 місяців тому +1

      👍🏻😅 I see nothing has changed in the 40+years since I was in the USAF.

  • @samuelhowie4543
    @samuelhowie4543 8 місяців тому +6

    The dishwasher one brought back some memories. We had a sign hanging above the sinks that said; K.P. It's not just a job, but an adventure.

    • @francess.8990
      @francess.8990 8 місяців тому +2

      This one also brought back memories for me. My favorite: a group of people were talking about an event that one couple had missed. The wife said they couldn't go because the husband had to work. Someone asked what kind of work he did and she very proudly replied "he is a maintenance engineer". At which point the husband spoke up and said " awe Hon, why do you always say that? You know I am the janitor at the elementary school". The look on her face was priceless.

    • @samuelhowie4543
      @samuelhowie4543 8 місяців тому

      @@francess.8990 😂😂

  • @debby8428
    @debby8428 8 місяців тому +11

    The former president celebrated his 60th birthday during the height of C. One of his famous guests put a picture on instagram of the party and no one was wearing face coverings. She was asked to take the picture down immediately. Its no wonder they didn't allow drones.

    • @heatherconner1125
      @heatherconner1125 8 місяців тому

      Not wearing face masks was the least of what was going on there.

    • @debby8428
      @debby8428 8 місяців тому

      @@heatherconner1125 oh boy!

  • @frankb389
    @frankb389 8 місяців тому +12

    5:04 I'm not like other girls.... you better check and see 😂

  • @beerbratscheese1230
    @beerbratscheese1230 8 місяців тому +4

    Now I know why fast food hamburgers are getting so expensive. More and more farmers are growing them with seedless buns.

  • @TnT_F0X
    @TnT_F0X 8 місяців тому +41

    No no... She asked for a sandwich.
    1/2 a pita, Tomato, Cucumber, Lettuce, Onion, vinaigrette.
    Bring her a 150 calorie sandwich!

    • @DM-qd7gw
      @DM-qd7gw 8 місяців тому +5

      100 of that being the pita

    • @joscelynpease6656
      @joscelynpease6656 8 місяців тому +2

      Sounds delicious!

    • @mixedmediaartgirl300
      @mixedmediaartgirl300 8 місяців тому +4

      Skip the pita🥙 .... lettuce wrap.🥬🥬

    • @CurrentlyDuck1
      @CurrentlyDuck1 8 місяців тому

      That sounds pretty good

    • @enlightenthebenighted8735
      @enlightenthebenighted8735 8 місяців тому

      I saw that meme on reddit before watching this. They didn't like that I pointed out that you don't have to cope eat after being mocked for being fat.

  • @DChrls
    @DChrls 8 місяців тому +25

    Blue hair use to mean an old woman. Now it means crazy woman.

  • @kevindossey3649
    @kevindossey3649 8 місяців тому +5

    i used to hustle garbage pail kids, ones that I drew myself. sold them for a quarter back in the 80s LOL

    • @markmurex6559
      @markmurex6559 8 місяців тому

      I did that too, but I also got in trouble for drawing a large one on the school sidewalk with crayons.

  • @mbourque
    @mbourque 8 місяців тому +11

    7:39
    there are MANY languages that use masculine and feminine terms...

  • @KaleidoscopeJunkie
    @KaleidoscopeJunkie 8 місяців тому +32

    RUM & COKE -
    Sugar, caffeine and booze.

    • @ontheroad5317
      @ontheroad5317 8 місяців тому +2

      Mmmmmm. That’s three of my food groups right there.

    • @JMan-24
      @JMan-24 8 місяців тому +1

      I came here looking for this comment. Nicely done!!!

  • @Mark-om3cl
    @Mark-om3cl 8 місяців тому

    The aqua thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminium and steel one made me chuckle.

  • @Rogueflier
    @Rogueflier 8 місяців тому +51

    12%’ers…HOLD THE LINE!👊

    • @kri249
      @kri249 8 місяців тому +4

      Why only 12%? Because we're as rare as a steak should be.

    • @markmurex6559
      @markmurex6559 8 місяців тому +1

      I'm a jerky man myself. I always snack on jerky.

    • @timothycormier3494
      @timothycormier3494 8 місяців тому

      Holding strong on my end! 😁

    • @sooyster4033
      @sooyster4033 8 місяців тому

      with you till the end my brothers

    • @iseaglewings4031
      @iseaglewings4031 8 місяців тому

      I don't even understand how that stat is possible... I'm a woman and I eat a pound of meat most days. Unless it's like 12% of NYC or some places with lots of vegetarians.

  • @LadyHawke78
    @LadyHawke78 8 місяців тому +16

    As an unashamed member of the “passing-grade cup-size” club (also known as the “IBTC…”) 23:04 had me 💀💀💀
    🤣🤣

    • @kellykirkwood4567
      @kellykirkwood4567 8 місяців тому +7

      I’d forgotten about that IBTC!! Good throwback to my youth. 😂

    • @jp-ty1vd
      @jp-ty1vd 8 місяців тому +4

      we just called them "bee stings". (:

    • @justforever96
      @justforever96 8 місяців тому +4

      Don't worry. Some of us don't like large breasts. They kind of turn me off. Just a handful is fine. I think it looks better personally and don't get the obsession with large ones. Seems weird and creepy to me. And I think largely a learned behavior.

    • @jp-ty1vd
      @jp-ty1vd 8 місяців тому

      @@justforever96 big boobs look good with clothes on but kinda wierd naked. just my opinion. I'm a B-C guy myself.

    • @OneHitWonder383
      @OneHitWonder383 8 місяців тому +1

      The most important thing about a woman is not what's in front of her chest. The most important thing about a woman is what is behind her eyes.

  • @FictionCautious
    @FictionCautious 8 місяців тому +38

    Listen to the devil > believe the devil > become the devil
    Conclusion: Earplugs are humanity's last hope and savior.

  • @klf6992
    @klf6992 8 місяців тому +1

    Im reading our book. Will finish today. Thanks I guess. We have alot in common although Im from The South and older. Thank God y'all made it out and bless your Mom.

  • @mineduck3050
    @mineduck3050 8 місяців тому +27

    I think every american without fingerprints on file should go to nyc and claim they are paco martinez. Go have a 5 star manhattan holiday with a 10k debit card to spend.

    • @justforever96
      @justforever96 8 місяців тому

      I really doubt they are running everyones fingerprints.

    • @madtabby66
      @madtabby66 8 місяців тому

      Well damn my federal job!

    • @stephenater9687
      @stephenater9687 8 місяців тому

      Veterans need not apply.

    • @FuriosaSonoran
      @FuriosaSonoran 7 місяців тому

      If the "service" is free... YOU are the product. Pay off: then your biometrics (yes, all of them including facial scan) will be theirs (the gov/NWO).

  • @testi2025
    @testi2025 8 місяців тому +1

    >zed talking about taxing people to death
    >Scandinavia

  • @fredj7701
    @fredj7701 8 місяців тому +6

    4:02 you should put Canada in that to.

  • @Jessica-ul6me
    @Jessica-ul6me 8 місяців тому +1

    I've never been so afraid as when a swarm of bees came out of the four loko cans in the bushes outside.

  • @DUDE-ww8cf
    @DUDE-ww8cf 8 місяців тому +1

    When you come home and find the Amazon boxes in the garage hide them . Then on a Saturday morning reseal them and put them on the front steps . Priceless

  • @Ryo7_7
    @Ryo7_7 8 місяців тому +11

    Milkless??...If I ever hear that, I know the apocalypse is around the corner.

  • @commanderrico8892
    @commanderrico8892 8 місяців тому

    It’s amazing that Tyler is still on UA-cam. I love seeing these fireworks fly.

  • @daviddewey2107
    @daviddewey2107 8 місяців тому +4

    I love putting together Ikea furniture because when it gets done it looks like I'm an actual Carpenter. When I do carpentry it looks great too, but only if you're about 50 ft away.

  • @The_NonDescript
    @The_NonDescript 8 місяців тому +3

    14:10 I love how blissfully Tyler missed that meme.

  • @TheStarshipGarage
    @TheStarshipGarage 8 місяців тому +2

    8:53 dawg those excavator toys were PEAK! I had one and I played with it until it got really badly rusted :( Then I switched to lego.

  • @cannon3267
    @cannon3267 8 місяців тому +4

    the guy who opens a restaurant named "I DON'T KNOW/CARE" is going to a) get rich b) become a hero to every guy who has a girl friend or wife

    • @janeenschultz8502
      @janeenschultz8502 8 місяців тому +2

      There is a bar in my hometown called "Somewhere" and another called "The Alibi". Good senses of humor.

  • @nevisstkitts8264
    @nevisstkitts8264 8 місяців тому +1

    22:48 u callin' me a slacker? gonna have to double that beef consumption again ...

  • @joshuayantis1763
    @joshuayantis1763 8 місяців тому +4

    I can quote all the Austin Powers movies from heart. I love Austin Powers. Also, when I was in high school, I sold Mountain Dew out of my locker. When questioned by the principal and superintendent I told them it's capitalism. I have the supply to fill the demand. I made a killing.

  • @bentdriver
    @bentdriver 8 місяців тому

    That last meme was a real burn. LMFAO

  • @brettsteele7386
    @brettsteele7386 8 місяців тому +4

    The last one was Fire.

  • @nothanksgoogle5879
    @nothanksgoogle5879 8 місяців тому

    Bro came back at her with a dose of her own toxin 🤣

  • @bykini
    @bykini 8 місяців тому +4

    3:54 Add Germany. In fact, Germany is already deep red. (But not the good red).

  • @whywouldigivemyrealname5162
    @whywouldigivemyrealname5162 8 місяців тому +2

    Fun fact. The national debt per person is 102k now, and that includes babies. The national debt per taxpayer is 266k.
    I'm living below my means and saving as I sit here and get more and more pissed off that it's all going to be for naught. It's super hard to sacrifice like I do knowing that things are probably going to implode before I see the results. But there's a slim enough chance that it will work for me that I'm going to keep pressing on.

  • @beyondrepair8949
    @beyondrepair8949 8 місяців тому +3

    Student loans will be forgiven - ah Bullwinkle that trick always works. And this time for sure Rocky. If you know, you know.

  • @Shane0622
    @Shane0622 8 місяців тому +1

    dangit I actually lost at the screwdriver lol it caught me off guard.

  • @justintrefney1083
    @justintrefney1083 8 місяців тому +5

    First time I went golfing I shot a 90!. Then on the second hole I got an 88

  • @b3pahunter546
    @b3pahunter546 8 місяців тому +1

    That gas-powered guitar was a real thing. I saw it.

  • @carlhursh505
    @carlhursh505 8 місяців тому +9

    Zed, you were in the Air Force, NOT the military. 😂

    • @donadeavera9608
      @donadeavera9608 8 місяців тому +1

      How would the "military" win battles without airforce backup?😅

    • @jp-ty1vd
      @jp-ty1vd 8 місяців тому

      @@donadeavera9608Ancient Rome did it.

  • @daszieher
    @daszieher 8 місяців тому

    this one was really good. Had me rolling😂
    bring on the dad jokes and memes.
    Also the grilled Air Force...

  • @christianjosephkarner
    @christianjosephkarner 8 місяців тому +24

    I am from Vienna. A Wiener. I am white. Are these sausages from Netflix?

    • @dehydratedwater9806
      @dehydratedwater9806 8 місяців тому +2

      Are Vienna sausages a real thing there? Or like in the states just a version of potted meat with a stiffy.

    • @jimreilly917
      @jimreilly917 8 місяців тому

      Here in the USA hotdog makers market them as wieners sometimes. I’ve no idea why. They are not even close to sausage of any kind. 🇺🇸🇦🇹

    • @jimreilly917
      @jimreilly917 8 місяців тому

      😂

    • @nozrep
      @nozrep 8 місяців тому +3

      ok but the cross-linguistical puns that you just typed are not caught by most so you are going to have to make another comment explaining the additionally funny jokes you just made. Remember w and v both have different soundings in English and German. Also, I don’t speak German. But I am pretty sure you were making some cross-language pun jokes and I LIKE IT!!!! Also, please explain.

    • @LynyrdSkynyrdFan
      @LynyrdSkynyrdFan 8 місяців тому

      😂😂

  • @jcboutoire
    @jcboutoire 8 місяців тому

    Tyler's response to the Air Force meme is the only time today that I laughed out loud. I work overnights and have been up since 8:40 last night and it's 5 pm.

  • @jamesfoskey2804
    @jamesfoskey2804 8 місяців тому +7

    17:10 kid selling cheetos at school.
    Tyler: that's stupid but props to the kid.
    Also Tyler. "I sold kool-aid singles for $1 and made a killing."

  • @willo8856
    @willo8856 8 місяців тому

    The screwdriver one you laughed on the inside 😂

  • @cherylweber1246
    @cherylweber1246 8 місяців тому +5

    A woman knows where she wants to eat, she wants to a, make you guess, to stimulate conversation, b, you to choose a high end place as a demonstration of your love and adoration of her so all of her friends will be jealous, c, or she wants to order too little food so she can eat your food and you can't get mad, or d, all of the above.

    • @markmurex6559
      @markmurex6559 8 місяців тому

      They should just stop playing those games.