Show Don't Tell - Direct and Indirect Characterization
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- Опубліковано 9 лип 2024
- One of the best ways to make characters feel real is by showing rather than telling. You've probably heard "Show Don't Tell" before, but we want to show you how you can use it when you write characters!
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L a T E N C Y by Mystery Mammal
Adverbs "dress up a bad verb and try to sell it back to you at twice the price" might well be one of my favourite pieces of writing advice I've ever heard.
You're having a good hair day :) But also, this is extremely helpful. I'm horrible about using adverbs as a crutch when I don't know how to describe something clearly. Thanks!
Thanks! 😊 The adverb struggle is REAL. It's so easy to slip into using them. Whenever I'm editing anything, removing adverbs is a huge chunk of the process 😅
I'm loving the videos! Solid production value. I can't wait to see more!
Appreciate it!
Men with eyeglasses will always be the most attractive 😎 Awesome video. Knowing when to show and tell is probably one of the hardest parts of writing.
Leave it to the imagination - can't beat it.
Shelby race car driver description was on point. Thank you
I'm old, I know. When I was at school I was not taught about "show, not tell". I was taught to balance description with action and to be intentional with the words I chose.
I like your video, because my biggest issue with the "show, not tell" is that 99.999% of it is all about creating dumbed down rules or laws that no-one really understands but must follow. The same goes to adverbs: adverbs are awesome when well used, and you need to know why you would rather use an adverb rather than a more powerful verb. That choice can also help hint at the personality of a character when it speaks when paired up with more vigorous dialogues from other characters. BTW, I have the impression (due to what I find online) that English speaking people nowadays seem to be trying to erradicate any adverb without realising words such as 'not' are adverbs. Am I being led astray by a vocal minority, or is this really a thing?
Sorry for the rant, and keep up the good work, Campfire Technology!
Adverbs are generally considered bad form these days, but they are by no means forbidden! One of the big issues is that some newer writers use them as a crutch, but they still have their time and place 🙂
Oh my god. This video is amazing. Thank you so much for putting everything into a way we can understand and yet still teach us so much. Definitely subscribing, god bless!
I enjoyed this - one small quibble, please make the background music a little quieter.
Thank you so much! Your having a good hair day.
~Rem
No problem! and thanks 😎
Very much appreciate this series. Well done, and it draws me to Campfire even more.
Glad you're enjoying it! 😊
Great video on a very popular subject. I like how you put it with regards to the reader--let's not forget we probably want people to read our books. I feel much more engaged and, yes, even a bit clever, when I'm putting the picture together, bit by bit, from the narrative.
The racecar driver example was good IF that was from another's POV. But my favorite is learning about a character from their own POV. Partly, I like this because it's more intimate yet difficult: Intimate because you're in the character's head, difficult because people don't usually describe their clothes right before a race--maybe if they're surveying themselves in a mirror, but that's kind of cheating and overdone (still you can use it well--see below). Plus in your description, it's just that, a description; nothing interesting is happening.
Here's another shot at it:
The engine screamed in Shelby's ears at the pitch of 7,500 RPM as she downshifted into the turn. Boomer swept into view in her rear-view-mirror, and she caught her reflection: Her helmet was dull after so many years, but her visor reflected as clear as the mirror, creating an infinite loop inside the cockpit.
Shelby accelerated through the apex of the turn, her seat pressing the twine stitching of her name into her back, reminding her who she was. She'd eaten so much dust, her suit would never be white again. The fabric flapped at the wrists where her gloves had rubbed for years, and a draft entered the tear near her ankle, humid, oil-soaked air fanning her leg, reminding her of her latest failure.
She grit her teeth and stepped on the accelerator.
Thanks for the video and fun!
I thoroughly enjoy your software and it's also really nice that you guys are making videos about writing too. Can't wait to see what you guys have more in store for us! :)
Thanks so much! Glad you're enjoying it 😊
Great video dude! Really appreciate the clarification especially when its super entertaining!
This is super informative! Thanks for this.
Good god, what a great video.
Thanks so much, glad you enjoyed it 😊
Great video! I loved your example clip selections. Keep 'em coming!
Thanks! Will do 😊
I can smell your vsauce inspiration, thanks for the help.
I'm praticularly trying to write a good continuation for an existing story, fanfiction, so i'm more worried about developing the original characters, but I'll need to make sure i understand the characters in the original work well enough.
You definitely clocked the vsauce inspiration 😂 As for writing fan fiction, that is a delicate balance because character in stories will change, but you want them to change in a way that feels consistent with the original work. Happy writing!
If I may:
The thing about fanfiction is it's not inherently the same process as writing fiction. You should draw from the source material of course, but always remember that development of character and story are different - the most notable part of this being that people go into fanfiction already knowing the characters.
And nobody "understands" the original characters enough to replicate them in wholly different situations. Don't expect to, and give yourself leeway on it. It's not about being as well done as original fiction. It's about fun and loving the characters and story you're drawing inspiration from.
Cheers. :)
this video was rlly good make more plz
On it! 😊
Like the Alton Brown of story planning
This is the highest compliment I have ever gotten. Good Eats is the greatest cooking show of all time.
"Showing don't Telling" is ,as you said, not a rule For example, JK Rowling doesn't avoid the adverbs, and the Harry Potter series isn't a bad story, its the whole opposite, it's great. But she still created an amazing "mind theather" even if she didn't use this tactic. I'm not saying you shouldn't use "Show don't Tell", only that it is not necesary. 😊
I also think it's dangerous to say things like "adverbs are your nemesis." This is kind of just in vogue, guys. Words are tools. Different tools for different jobs. In the right context, adverbs are good tools.
"He angrily threw a tantrum" is both redundant and unhelpful.
"He stared at her flatly" gives context into how/why he's staring. It might still not be necessary depending on how you set it up, but it's not bad.
I was wondering if there is any plan to make story editable in real time from multiple people. I would like to do projects and storybuild with friends. I was messing with my google drive just before thinking about this. As is, one person would be required to gather all the groups info and chart, organize, link, and take the full grunt of the work on a large project. I would like a means to split the workload amongst a trusted few.
Our upcoming software Campfire Blaze is going to have collaboration features like this! Check it out: www.campfiretechnology.com/blaze/
@@AroundTheCampfire awesome I'm stoked. Pun intended.
@@AroundTheCampfire I got a $250 bonus today. I will be buying the $300 wildfire this weekend. I could really use a disc code if you are feeling sweet lol
Can you please put out an all-in-one tutorial?
I do understand most of your points, however I'm having trouble understanding how adverbs reduce clarity. To me, they actually ADD to clarity. Take your example:
John threw the ball angrily. You know exactly how he is feeling.
John flung the ball. Not as clear because flinging can be used to mean an imprecise throw, not a harsh one. If anything, when I hear that someone flung a ball, I imagine that rather than throwing for a purpose, or having some kind of target, they threw it with a lack of effort or care, simply to get it away from themselves. You still then have to describe that he was angry in order to give the reader an understanding of why he was doing it, but you've taken twice as long.
I get your points and "flung" might not be the best example, it was just simple. The reality is that the distinction here relies on the context around the sentence. We should know that John is angry from the situation. Saying he threw something "angrily". Doesn't really mean anything. Like you said about flung and it's different contexts, you could also imagine throwing "angrily" a bunch of different ways. I think I would actually use something like "drove the ball into the fence" or "hurled it into the fence." Both of those communicate a sense of intensity that you don't get from "threw." "John hurled the ball at the fence" sounds a lot better than "John angrily threw the ball at the fence."
@@AroundTheCampfire Maybe I'm just broken, but to me it feels like the first one (using hurled) prioritizes the action and the second (angrily threw) prioritizes the emotion behind the action, which (at least in this situation) is more important. To restate what I mean: the first one seems to say that the way the ball hit the fence is the really important part and him being angry is extra detail where the second one seems to say that his anger is what matters and that his manifestation of that anger (the throwing) illustrates that point further but isn't really the focus.
I understand the notion of not overdoing the adverbs because using them every time is, frankly, lazy. But it seems like "solo verbs" or "adverb-modified verbs" can each be useful in their own right depending on what emphasis you are trying to place on the sentence.
Beyond that, there are also some verbs that have no correctly emphasized variant on their own. For example, he cleaned the shop vigorously. There isn't really a "vigorous" variant of clean, so without an adverb, you can't effectively portray the effort he put into his cleaning job. One could argue "purge" or "purify" but to say "he purified the shop" doesn't quite sound right.
Thanks for the advice and information. Campfire has helped me improve my writing immensely. (And how would you propose to state that the improvement was immense without an adverb, hmm?) : )
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