Violence against women: the end begins with men | Patricia Shea | TEDxNashville

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  • Опубліковано 1 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 148

  • @Pakam3
    @Pakam3 7 років тому +31

    I just watched a bunch of the TED talks on similar topics, and this one is underrated, yet it's one of the best. Thank you, Patricia Shea.

    • @SJO897
      @SJO897 4 роки тому +5

      because it puts the onus on us (men) and we can't face that.

    • @SudarshanDee
      @SudarshanDee 2 роки тому

      It absolutely is!

  • @Vixinaful
    @Vixinaful 2 роки тому +11

    "Few bad guys"? This is extremely common and its killing women every damned day! I am one of the victms and almost lost my life! DO NOT underplay this!

  • @rosesai8053
    @rosesai8053 7 років тому +37

    It shouldn't matter what gender you are, if you are being abused as a man it is WRONG
    If you are being abused as a women it is WRONG

    • @emmae6184
      @emmae6184 6 років тому +20

      Supergirlfans she’s not saying it’s not wrong when men are abused she’s just pointing out a societal problem of violence against women she even acknowledged that it hurts men too

    • @samanthaleon1886
      @samanthaleon1886 6 років тому +10

      She presented an idea to end violence, what is yours?

    •  5 років тому +1

      @@samanthaleon1886 - Here's an idea: Admit that violence is learned in the home .... from mothers!! That' a FACT.

    • @dmerlin777
      @dmerlin777 4 роки тому

      Rosesai THANK YOU! 🙏
      Absolutely!

  • @saradellabella8175
    @saradellabella8175 6 років тому +26

    I love this woman. She needs to speak to every police department and at intervention classes. This is an epidemic. I never thought it would happen to me and it did. It’s sick and should be criminal. They still make you the problem it’s not changing enough.

  • @MichaelWill6138
    @MichaelWill6138 7 років тому +32

    Completely against violence against women. But men who batter need help despite the heinousness of their crimes. We throw people away instead of treating them.

    • @mthomas769
      @mthomas769 7 років тому +5

      That is actually my job. It's amazing with the right programs seeing the transition by battering men over a 16 week period.

    • @osmosisjones4912
      @osmosisjones4912 7 років тому

      Michael Williams we know how she would react to her being batted by Hiawatha wife or her being getting herased molested by a bunch of horny chicks. or was indebted all his money in alimony leaving him homeless or killed work .. she laugh with women and men do. to.men's only problem is erectile dysfunction not prostate cancer blood pressure or one of many things inflicted by women. it's a south park episode Kartman laughing at breast cancer so beat his ass though she going face high penalty if she did she's would lose more if she didn't . but still don't hit girls no one said anything about pepper spray :-)

    • @angelaoftedahl8480
      @angelaoftedahl8480 6 років тому

      Michael 11803
      Will you please contact me.... I have a few questions for you if you don't mind. :)

    • @wselenag45
      @wselenag45 6 років тому +12

      Yeah you can treat them, but the damage they caused on the women is already done.

    • @SJO897
      @SJO897 4 роки тому +1

      well until we actually charge rapists then we can talk about this.

  • @Mahi-ni9kz
    @Mahi-ni9kz 4 роки тому +14

    7:30
    Year 2020
    Expectation: the safest city
    Reality: even leaving your house is dangerous

  • @mharrod258
    @mharrod258 4 роки тому +15

    Sad to see so many comments arguing what gender violence is 'important' or 'who is to blame' rather than acknowledging the many great men this lady is talking about. All of whom, every man could step up and become. Great Ted Talk.

    • @WoodysOpinion101
      @WoodysOpinion101 2 роки тому +1

      Violence is a human issue and not a gender issue

    • @mimosa27
      @mimosa27 Рік тому +2

      ​@Aj Wood 84 Thats true, but physical violence is overwhelmingly male.

    • @leo-lh4oy
      @leo-lh4oy Рік тому

      Men dont owe women anything

  • @mthomas769
    @mthomas769 7 років тому +30

    For the men commenting, let me share some information with you. 70% of homicides in domestic violence relationships happen shortly after she leaves and he no longer can control her at home. We lose 3 women a day to domestic violence. Men use violence for much different reasons than women. We are shamed when using the N word or R word but don't get shamed for calling a woman a bitch. The amount of violence perpetrated by men towards women far exceeds the vice versa. This isn't feminist garbage but rather reality for thousands of women every day. Men do not fear women at the same rate women fear men. It is our responsibility to stop this violence. Traditionally, we are the heads of households and predominantly the religious and business leaders. 45 male presidents and 0 female. To say otherwise means to keep your head in the sand.

    • @osmosisjones4912
      @osmosisjones4912 7 років тому +3

      Michael 11803 how react if came home your brother was cut up by his wife or a horny chick at college came jumped to him grabbing and kissing after he said no getting him in trouble wife or girl friend and kicks him in the balls. not hypothetical actually so coming in plane sight comity . and remember a south park episode Kartam was making fun of breast cancer so Wendy beat his ass as so though she was going to face harsh punishment something women rarely get justice is something you don't want equal pay on .but she shut his mouth anyway because it was worth it she lose more if she didn't same for men you lose more if don't even you cut them from your life they'll come after you men only is sexist .stopping and stop insulting man's best friend to you horrible Creatures a

    • @letmebefrank5080
      @letmebefrank5080 6 років тому +3

      Michael 11803 You make an issue that 2/3 of tragic DV deaths are women victims. That may be true but you still have succumbed to classic *femin* *ist* *propa* *ganda* (without the gaps these words block the comment from appearing). You must look at other numbers to put that into perspective.
      Using USA statistics, according to OSHA data, in 2013, 88 men died tragically in workplace accidents per week (women are statistically insignificant), according to Wiki 13.5 men and 31.5 women died per week through IPV (or DV), according to WISQARS 54 women and 184 men died per week by suicide.
      Then consider that there are over 100,000 deaths from cancer each week.

    •  5 років тому +2

      Thanks to feminists lobbying, the FBI now classifies the contracting of killing of husbands by their wives as "multiple offender homicides" instead of DV homicides. Further, murders by women who kill by poisoning are not treated as DV homicides. Your stats are tragically flawed.

    •  5 років тому

      You're WRONG. Violence against men and boys perpetrated by women is not accounted for in any statistics you can find. Mothers teach their sons to be violent. FACT!

    • @nanochad2979
      @nanochad2979 3 роки тому +4

      40% of dv victims are men

  • @sofiajgrassetti9311
    @sofiajgrassetti9311 3 роки тому +5

    Neighbors are the worst in this case. I've asked and yelled for help crying many times even in the night when my ex boyfriend was beating me up and I got 0 help. No one helps because of the concern to get involved in it. Make ensure to have
    A. a no-abuser man
    B a no-abuser man
    C Don't let make it happens twice
    C. if your neighbors don't help report them as well failure to assist.
    People with common sense should intervein anonymously these people freaks me out indeed along with their indifference. Sucks

    • @SudarshanDee
      @SudarshanDee 2 роки тому

      I am so sorry this happened to you and that you were so betrayed on so many levels. I was fortunate three weeks ago because my downtown nosey neighbours all called the police AND the security team in my apartment building. Plus they stood by to protect the security staff who pounded on my door and opened it. If I had been living in a house or a different type of neighbourhood in the suburbs I could have died.

    • @DipakBithikaBarua
      @DipakBithikaBarua Рік тому

      🤷‍♂ima be minda ma own business

  •  5 років тому +11

    Violence against women BEGINS with single mothers' violence against their sons. Until that is addressed everything else is irrelevant. Children are TAUGHT to be violent, and their teacher becomes their victim when they grow up.

  • @sheldonbrown3261
    @sheldonbrown3261 5 років тому +16

    Considering one sided (non-reciprocal) domestic violence is women against men, domestic violence needs to end with women.

    •  5 років тому +1

      EXACTLY!!

  • @ad2989-j3k
    @ad2989-j3k 6 місяців тому +1

    Neighbours and onlookers don't intervene because when they do, at least 7 out of 10 times, women turn around, save the abuser and frame the intervener.

  • @itzben87
    @itzben87 5 років тому +23

    From a Man: To all the Men- "A man who raises hands at women is the weakest man".

    •  5 років тому +4

      A man who lets a woman beat him is not a man.

    • @allen_p
      @allen_p 4 роки тому +14

      If she hits first all bets are off. I don't go start a fight with 6' 7" guy that is solid muscle. Far too many women believe they allowed to hit men.. Don't start anything you can't finish.

    • @AB-ou8ve
      @AB-ou8ve 4 роки тому +1

      Allen Pape
      Amen

    • @ukulkarni
      @ukulkarni 2 роки тому +3

      And even the weakest man has a right to defend himself.

    • @leo-lh4oy
      @leo-lh4oy Рік тому

      Hope she sees this bro.

  • @jazminnew1529
    @jazminnew1529 5 років тому +9

    I don't want this for my children ❤️ or future generations..she's right. We can't do this alone.but we can do it together.. men and women

  • @solangeboudreau6467
    @solangeboudreau6467 5 років тому +31

    Awesome Ted Talk. The fragile masculinity in the comment section shows us all how these talks are desperately needed.

    •  5 років тому

      Nice ... typical male-bashing comment from a feminazi.

    • @nanochad2979
      @nanochad2979 3 роки тому +9

      can we stop pretending only 1 gender abuses the other?

    • @cheaze69
      @cheaze69 3 роки тому +1

      The fragile femininity here shows us why men hit women.

    • @leo-lh4oy
      @leo-lh4oy Рік тому +1

      Men dont owe women anything, if a woman is being assaulted only her son should save her, no one else is obliged to

  • @deets773
    @deets773 9 років тому +5

    What a great topic that the world needs to know about! Thank you for being brave enough to talk about this topic.

    • @MrROTD
      @MrROTD 8 років тому +1

      +deets773 Yeah because psychos wouldnt rape if they just knew it was wrong, oh wait they do know and dont give a fuck

    • @theknowall2232
      @theknowall2232 8 років тому +2

      +deets773 Rape definitions have trivialised rape, but the consequences for accused men are still serious. It is very often the revenge tactic for upset women, or a woman fraudulently seeking sympathy. See the video, *RAPE HYSTERIA - Part 1 | History Repeats Itself*

    • @WoodysOpinion101
      @WoodysOpinion101 2 роки тому +1

      Violence is a human issue not a gender issue

  • @kittykatross3896
    @kittykatross3896 Рік тому +1

    Violence begats violence, and I'm sorry, but we as a society cannot change unless the prisons are filled with them. Be it woman, man, or what have yolu

  • @supertatertot97
    @supertatertot97 9 років тому +24

    This is a beautiful video with a beautiful message. I don't understand why those of you men who are commenting are being so negative, so derogatory towards the main point of the video. You are perpetuating the cycle of violence against women. We have been trying for years and nothing is happening. Men don't listen to women, men listen to men. Men will listen to a challenge set forth by men. This is what our screwed up world needs to be hearing. Men don't just need o leave their "baby mommas" because they don't want to be responsible for the baby, they need to change. They need to be a role model that baby should see. But, men won't listen to me because I am a woman. So you men, take this talk to heart and put it upon yourselves to make a difference.
    On another not, this video wasn't about violence against men. If you want to see a video about that topic, find one.

    • @edwardmichaels6429
      @edwardmichaels6429 8 років тому +12

      It's part of a one sided broader lie based feminist narrative.

    • @osmosisjones4912
      @osmosisjones4912 7 років тому +2

      Alyssa Davis so if shouldn't leave our baby momma should we tell you not kill them. or is it only women have productive rights that's why no one listening to you

    • @user-dj9ik9nf5d
      @user-dj9ik9nf5d 7 років тому +4

      Alyssa Davis
      Check gynocentrism
      Man and women support women and nobody supports mana issue

    • @samanthaleon1886
      @samanthaleon1886 6 років тому +2

      @@MrROTD Whats your point then, what is the way to prevent violence for the next generation?

    • @PsychicsRfake456
      @PsychicsRfake456 5 років тому +7

      Alyssa Davis, so you wonder why men have a negative view of this video and then go on to paint men with a broad brush in a negative light

  • @damianbylightning6823
    @damianbylightning6823 7 років тому +5

    I think you mean 'fraudulent talks' not frequent talks. Can someone please start a campaign to stop rain on bank holidays. The problem with setting impossible targets is that the windbags who promote the domestic violence industry, can always scream that we've not met their demands. The logical conclusion is that the state must do more, more laws and more control over people's lives.

  • @the_man_of_science
    @the_man_of_science 3 роки тому +5

    When men are abused by women in a relationship, I'd like to hear something other than "as a wise man you should walk away", "men should walk away or if necessary only use as much force as the abuser", "women are weaker", "walk away and don't come back".
    Frankly speaking, a woman uses physical abuse against men only and only because she knows she can get away with it and even fighting back would be consequential only for the man.
    To the gallows she goes

  • @frecklefingers
    @frecklefingers 6 років тому +12

    If Patricia Shea is really concerned with children, she would acknowledge that abusive mothers are as common as abusive fathers. For some reason, it's difficult for feminists to acknowledge abusive behavior by women.

    •  5 років тому +1

      Wayyy MORE abusive according to DOJ Bureau of Justice Statistics. OVER 60% of child abuse in the home is by mothers!!! ONLY 2% by bio-fathers, rest is by step-fathers and mom's boyfriends.

    • @SudarshanDee
      @SudarshanDee 2 роки тому

      Shut up.

  • @kdlofty
    @kdlofty 11 місяців тому

    So what do you do if two women are married and one assaults the other? Domestic violence starts and ends with BOTH men AND women.

  • @smellyface28
    @smellyface28 7 років тому +13

    *Warning* if you are an overly sensitive male, this video may be triggering.

  • @sedefashley2021
    @sedefashley2021 3 роки тому +1

    This is one of those Ted talks that did not get the views it deserved.

  • @kittykatross3896
    @kittykatross3896 Рік тому

    My daughter asked me "What did you DO to cause THIS?

  • @annalisavajda252
    @annalisavajda252 Рік тому +2

    I think it has to do with cultural acceptance in general and some abusers have female enablers too. Depends how they were raised someone like me allowed to shout at my brother's and argue with them but not assaulted by them won't tolerate a boy that wasn't raised to be non violent with girls thinks assault is just "playing" with girls etc. Some domestic abuse victims victim blame other survivors too though female battered women's shelters can be awful places not really healing environments in my experience because everyone is traumatized there. Police dismiss concerns don't enforce protection orders what's acceptable gets redefined and violence is allowed to escalate you maybe only get hit once every few months at first but gradually that becomes a bi weekly thing then maybe daily because tolerance builds up to the problem and if you refuse to tolerate it even occasionally someone else may think your boundaries too strict.

  • @Nicky_LarSwana
    @Nicky_LarSwana 9 років тому +7

    and what about women's violence against men?
    you really need to read

  • @poppingcats1
    @poppingcats1 7 років тому +16

    13:23 Why violence against women is so tolerated?????? what???? I don't know what world you're living in lady, but the only violence that tolerated is violence against men. It's engrained in the minds of every man that women > men. If a woman is in trouble, if a woman is in need of help, you as a man need to drop everything you're doing and help her. I saw a girl hitting a man, I don't know their relationship but she as WAILING on him, he had enough and shoved her hard away from him. This caused the once passive onlookers to engage and beat him, badly. It was perfectly fine that she was hitting him as hard as she could, actively trying to harm him, but the second he defends himself not by striking but by pushing her away, he's beat up.
    This thought that violence against women is laughable, and shows how crazy you must be to believe it. What happens when there's a hostage situation? What happens in the event of an emergency such as a fire? "women and children first". As men we're expected to bend over backwards for women, ANY women. Hold their bags, hold the door open, allow them to go first, help them carry things in; it's clear in our society women are a protected class, who, in virtue of their gender, get many things handed to them and help at any turn; as a man you're just supposed to man up.

    •  5 років тому +1

      It is violence against MEN that is tolerated. This woman would make Paul Joseph Goebbels proud.

  • @tondun
    @tondun 5 років тому +5

    According to the Center for Disease Control, domestic violence rates between the genders are practically equal. If men reported domestic violence more, everyone would know that women are more likely to initiate domestic violence.

  • @joydot7620
    @joydot7620 7 років тому +13

    having listened to this i am taken aback by the comments - a number of men watched it but many seem to have heard something very diff. wierd

    •  5 років тому +1

      Because it's anti-male propaganda.

  • @kittykatross3896
    @kittykatross3896 Рік тому +1

    I had mzzy FACE beat in by a"GUY" who thought he was caring, and KNEW it was gonna be OKAY.. I had 13 hours of Reconstructive Surgery because my Boyfriend LOVED me so much??

  • @kittykatross3896
    @kittykatross3896 Рік тому

    He committed suicide because he KNEW he would go to jail. He was only 34 years of age.

  • @fatimabostan5314
    @fatimabostan5314 4 роки тому +1

    thank you

  • @yasminekhalida2536
    @yasminekhalida2536 3 роки тому

    Very jolly lady.

  • @kittykatross3896
    @kittykatross3896 Рік тому

    wORLDLY we have a LOT to DO!!!

  • @mr.jakirhosenronnyronny4705
    @mr.jakirhosenronnyronny4705 6 років тому +1

    Thanks a lot

  • @bradrichards8122
    @bradrichards8122 3 роки тому +2

    This lady is looking through a straw.

  • @osmosisjones4912
    @osmosisjones4912 7 років тому +6

    erectile dysfunction could be sign as prostate cancer. their could be many causes of prostate cancer. over use past limits kick in. The balls testicular injuries is prostate cancer effects mostly men. and it's even more common then breast cancer..

    • @swimdownx6365
      @swimdownx6365 7 років тому

      Osmosis Jones and I like to take inspiration from a south park episode Wendy was talking about breast cancer Karmen was making jokes about it Wendy was gonna Beat him up but Karmen told the teacher and Wendy was gonna get in big trouble . but principle a breast cancer survivor told her what consequences take em cancer isn't gonna play by the rules neither can you do what you can beat the Sh#t out of that fat lump. on stage now saying mens only problem is erectile dysfunction witch could be sign prostate CANCER. like Wendy I you'l lose more if you don't beat abuse the sh#t out of that fat lump.

  • @tompalmer5986
    @tompalmer5986 5 років тому +3

    I agree that violence against women is the number one human rights issue in the U.S. But there are blurred lines. How about this: One time this guy and I were laying on a bed with a woman. She was very drunk, and she decided she wanted to take us both on. We didn't respond to her advances, and she started yelling "Why not!?" We still didn't oblige her, and it hurt her feelings very badly. Sometimes yes doesn't mean yes. She was too drunk to give consent.

    • @LucyInk121
      @LucyInk121 3 роки тому +8

      You've answered your own question. She was drunk.

    • @tompalmer5986
      @tompalmer5986 3 роки тому

      It hurt her feelings pretty badly when we didn't oblige her.

    • @creepyscope7824
      @creepyscope7824 Рік тому

      @@tompalmer5986 your miss bud! Yall should f her then you both disappear!

  • @allen_p
    @allen_p 4 роки тому +2

    The beginning starts with women. Take responsibility for your safety
    Drunk at parties, leaving a bar with a man/men not knowing their name and your friend doesn't know where you're going, ....... Women get so many free passes to not be responsible.

    • @mharrod258
      @mharrod258 4 роки тому +8

      Victim blaming at its finest.

    • @alwdance
      @alwdance 3 роки тому +3

      a woman in the UK recently did everything possible in her power to make sure she was safe on a walk home yet still ended up murdered. so your suggestion is that women just stay home/take an extreme amount of precautions while men are free to live their lives however they please?

    • @Silverswitch1
      @Silverswitch1 3 роки тому

      @@mharrod258 the victim in every crime could have always done something to avoid that crime. It isn’t victim blaming, it is giving very good advice.

    • @leo-lh4oy
      @leo-lh4oy Рік тому

      A man doesnt need to do anything for a woman

    • @MalesAreDemons
      @MalesAreDemons Місяць тому

      So don’t trust men I never did

  • @mahekparvez5952
    @mahekparvez5952 4 роки тому

    Brilliant

  • @rebeccastanhope3989
    @rebeccastanhope3989 2 роки тому +1

    What about the church?

  • @Ewereruth
    @Ewereruth 6 років тому +4

    I agree to this until it got to objectification, women and the media objectify women.
    Women should be taught to respect men.

    • @leo-lh4oy
      @leo-lh4oy Рік тому

      They only respect money and violence

  • @beruriernoir1313
    @beruriernoir1313 6 років тому +3

    Feminism,a momevent to defend womens rights,at the cost of mens rights

    • @emmae6184
      @emmae6184 6 років тому +4

      nico pro what did say that was against men. Antifeminists love to reach for things that aren’t there.

    • @alwdance
      @alwdance 3 роки тому +4

      ah yes, I’d love to hear the rights men are losing in the name of feminism

    • @nanochad2979
      @nanochad2979 3 роки тому +2

      @@alwdance maybe that she didn't say that men are almost equally as likely to be abused? are 2 times more likely to be assualted and 3.5 times more murdered?

    • @MalesAreDemons
      @MalesAreDemons Місяць тому

      @@nanochad2979Yh by other MEN

  • @leelee6000
    @leelee6000 5 років тому +9

    I'm good man I never hurt lady's xxxxx

  • @aspenivy3268
    @aspenivy3268 3 роки тому

    Wrong. Even in the case of emotionally unstable person who'd can't control his or her anger. They might show some discretion. They know not to take something out on their boss are their favorite materials. It's almost a different talk to give you find someone that will literally break that car, and get in a fight with every single person. some people, the men in this case are just that narcissistic and they're going on this very basic primal fact of brute Force to enforce their will that's it. They do not care about the point of view or the will of the victim. It is a form of violence and objectification again to try to make it about men. it's about teaching women to protect themselves, and hoping that you would not treat them like nothing but instead value their experience and potential