Timeline: 00:00 - Intro 00:46 - The Conflict 17:13 - How to FIX a marriage 28:42 - Male vs Female Gender Roles 34:19 - What women NEED 40:35 - How to deal with Grief 1:18:28 - How to be Authentic
@@jakenewfield "People don't realize how much it takes to makes things easy". They become attached and tyrants to that hard process to make things not hard. It's mental bureaucracy. Lol. Relax, take it easy. But it's next to impossible to take people (Dentist) out of that frame who succeded professionally thanks to that frame. They will start thinking about "what did Sexton say? Okay now I gotta be more understanding. Omygosh I need to this I need to that". But they will do the same with brand new Sexton ammunition. That's withstanding fundamental stuff like "I need to fuck", and then she gotta fuck you there's no discussion on that that's next to the main reason you got with her, but that's out the modern frame. And your need to fuck can't subsidize, men and women aren't equal on almost everything, but the fact that you both work and bring money overshadows that fact. Like there's an easy frame that's the rule in every southeast asian family: "the mother decides everything realted to inside the home and the father decides everything outside the home" it's just an example but it should inspire you don't look to have a say in every subject it's wrong simply wrong. Ill leave you on a last dime: women dont understand men's intrinsic need for power. It cuts back to the lemon example of Sexton and the "Why" and the question at the beginning of when to to compromise to "happy wife happy life" and why we're two different species with different operating softwares, I let you meditate on that. Ask your wife on a dissent if she feels the need for respect and proof of serviance from you part, be surprised by the answer.
@@jakenewfield "People don't realize how much it takes to makes things easy". They become attached and tyrants to that hard process to make things not hard. It's mental bureaucracy. Lol. Relax, take it easy. But it's next to impossible to take people (Dentist) out of that frame who succeded professionally thanks to that frame. They will start thinking about "what did Sexton say? Okay now I gotta be more understanding. Omygosh I need to this I need to that". But they will do the same with brand new Sexton ammunition. That's withstanding fundamental stuff like "I need to fuck", and then she gotta fuck you there's no discussion on that that's next to the main reason you got with her, but that's out the modern frame. And your need to fuck can't subsidize, men and women aren't equal on almost everything, but the fact that you both work and bring money overshadows that fact. Like there's an easy frame that's the rule in every southeast asian family: "the mother decides everything realted to inside the home and the father decides everything outside the home" it's just an example but it should inspire you don't look to have a say in every subject it's wrong simply wrong. Ill leave you on a last dime: women dont understand men's intrinsic need for power. It cuts back to the lemon example of Sexton and the "Why" and the question at the beginning of when to to compromise to "happy wife happy life" and why we're two different species with different operating softwares, I let you meditate on that. Ask your wife on a dissent if she feels the need for respect and proof of serviance from you part, be surprised by the answer.
Depends on the marriage counselor. Some are not well trained, others are. I work with couples from time to time & it’s my job to be realistic with them.
It’s normal for relationships to encounter problems, but there’s always a way to navigate through them. My marriage faced major difficulties, but with the right support, my wife and I were able to solve our issues and fortify our bond. Solutions are possible if you’re committed to working together. Don’t give up-there’s always a solution.
I’m facing significant relationship problems and can’t stand the idea of losing her. My love and longing for my partner are profound, and I’m ready to do anything to restore our connection. I would greatly appreciate any advice or help you could give.
Moving on from someone you hold dear is invariably challenging, but in my experience, I was guided by a spiritual counselor who prevented the breakdown of my marriage. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
I appreciate your direction. I'll swiftly look her up online. Thanks. I'm hopeful that following this course of action will bring about positive changes for me too; her absence is deeply felt.
She’s a dentist and doing everything at home and you’re whining about packing time? Sorry to be blunt here: You need to put the work in. My husband and I had a lot of arguments when we had our second child. He wasn’t doing enough at home, I resented him and this totally killed my attraction for him. Financially we are pretty equal contributors and would be ok in a divorce and we almost got to that point. No one wants to parent their partner - it’s a complete turn off. She can leave if this continues and she will. Forget winning arguments (you’re also trying to win little anrguments with James and in the comments) and just be kinder. We have improved our relationship by being kinder in the ways we each needed. James is giving you priceless advice.
Have you considered things that you haven't been doing that killed his attraction for you? When guys are attracted to women, they move Heaven and Earth. If he wasn't doing things for you, perhaps you neglected his needs in some way.
That's an amazing conversation especially because it's put in a real life situation. James speaking so insightful on one side and the lovely connection and vulnerability shown in the couple on the other. Sounds like a warm friendly meeting.
At 45:21 I cried and I just wanted to give James Sexton a hug. At 1:43 James is making a good point most people dont think about "How can I be a more present and caring person to my partner? They usually only care when their partner is already into someone else.
Grief and tears are cleansing makes life more beautiful!!!!!! Humility and vulnerability are beautiful like after rain everything looks and smells more vibrant.
@porcupine783 men do it all the time. And we do it simpler and easier. Most of the things being addressed is more for the mother than the child. Putting things together at a place doesn't resonate from what I'm hearing and what I've seen in my life. There idea that men don't get it is sitcom logic. Dad's do as much or more for a huge if not the majority of American households. Now, is it to women's preferences, no, we're different and the needs and methods differ. But men do a damn fine job especially with record high single fathers. Keep an open mind and look around, you will see what I mean.
I find it interesting that none of the 3 people have suggested compromise. If he wants to leave on Monday, then she should negotiate: While I'm working on Saturday he should have the laundry done, bags packed, all baby gear ready for travel and the house cleaned. Then she would be ready to have a quick turn around and travel without being overwhelmed!
"I know she can do it a day"...well she may be can and she tell you straight in a face that she doesn't want to. And if you don't want to to stay for an extra day then offer her a help. Damn, just help her and you both will benefit
@@88Oleksiy He did offer. Is it possible that you have some preconceived ideas of this is/would play out? He discussed dividing rolls. He seems very willing to help.
I love and agree with this. But I think Feminist ideals wont allow for this. To the vast majority of the world, the overarching paradigm and purpose of a relationship is for a man to cater to the woman ceaselessly until she inevitably decides to be frustrated that he’s not making her happy and leaves. I know it’s a bit jaded and cynical to say and I’m not saying this about this couple, just the state of affairs.
She looks good, takes care of two kids, has a great career and I don’t hear him talking about helping her with the chores instead trying to push her to get it done faster and he is going to burn her out and if she makes decent money and he doesn’t contribute to house chores to help then she doesn’t need him and love and intimacy is helping doing chores to unload stress not add to it.
James Sexton is a great example of a masculine man who is emotionally intelligent and empathetic. He definitely is better than other psychologists/psychiatrists. ❤ Thank you for this awesome podcast.
31:00 Him: I like to think I’m emotionally in tune Her:🥴🤥 this was a good show to watch; to see a Divorce Lawyer talking to a couple who are not bitter with each other was informative
"People don't realize how much it takes to makes things easy". They become attached and tyrants to that hard process to make things not hard. It's mental bureaucracy. Lol. Relax, take it easy. But it's next to impossible to take people (Dentist) out of that frame who succeded professionally thanks to that frame. They will start thinking about "what did Sexton say? Okay now I gotta be more understanding. Omygosh I need to this I need to that". But they will do the same with brand new Sexton ammunition. That's withstanding fundamental stuff like "I need to fuck", and then she gotta fuck you there's no discussion on that that's next to the main reason you got with her, but that's out the modern frame. And your need to fuck can't subsidize, men and women aren't equal on almost everything, but the fact that you both work and bring money overshadows that fact. Like there's an easy frame that's the rule in every southeast asian family: "the mother decides everything realted to inside the home and the father decides everything outside the home" it's just an example but it should inspire you don't look to have a say in every subject it's wrong simply wrong. Ill leave you on a last dime: women dont understand men's intrinsic need for respect. It cuts back to the lemon example of Sexton and I let you meditate on that.
"People don't realize how much it takes to makes things easy". They become attached and tyrants to that hard process to make things not hard. It's mental bureaucracy. Lol. Relax, take it easy. But it's next to impossible to take people (Dentist) out of that frame who succeded professionally thanks to that frame. They will start thinking about "what did Sexton say? Okay now I gotta be more understanding. Omygosh I need to this I need to that". But they will do the same with brand new Sexton ammunition. That's withstanding fundamental stuff like "I need to fuck", and then she gotta fuck you there's no discussion on that that's next to the main reason you got with her, but that's out the modern frame. And your need to fuck can't subsidize, men and women aren't equal on almost everything, but the fact that you both work and bring money overshadows that fact. Like there's an easy frame that's the rule in every southeast asian family: "the mother decides everything realted to inside the home and the father decides everything outside the home" it's just an example but it should inspire you don't look to have a say in every subject it's wrong simply wrong. Ill leave you on a last dime: women dont understand men's intrinsic need for respect. It cuts back to the lemon example of Sexton and I let you meditate on that.
I felt like James was missing a lot of the conversation and Jake got the short end of this stick in this conversation. He was talking about leaving for the trip early vs leaving the trip later. And I am assuming that you have more family in boston than just your sister who passed away. What I hear is, After your sister passed away you went on a long journey of trying to find meaning in something that was awful. A solo journey, away from your family. You meet your now wife and move away, again, from your home base. In that time you brought a life into this world and thats when people want to be with their families the most. I think its important to remember that James is a divorce lawyer and not a psychologist.
if I go on vacation I start packing a few months before the trip, with a packing list. And it isn't like I haven't traveled before. And I am only taking a carry on and a personal item like a backpack
This posdcast really deserves more love! So glad it was recommended to me and i was able to understand how to understand my partner and being the most compassion as we can be to learn as about each other's feeling. Thank you for this, i would definitely re-listen to it again when the similar situation faces and remind myself to be more understanding to my partner. ❤
I love all about this, it shows how Feminism, or if that word is triggering to anyone - breaking up role-grooming (which doesn't necessarilly mean that typical 'masculine' and 'feminine' attributes do not have their place and time when they are authentic) is truly great for everyone. Meeting each other as feeling human beings always is the essence of everything. Thanks guys!!
The literal definition of feminism “the belief in social, economic, and political equality of the sexes.” When it comes to running a household with a marital (or otherwise agreed upon partner) those individuals need to communicate and together agree upon they way they would best like to divide up the responsibilities.
@@stinkiaapje He talked about how there is a place for both and that the core of partnership and a happy life always is authenticity and talking about your emotions. Please point out what moment in the video you are referring to. (And no matter what he said anyway, I'd still state that to me, the video showed what I commented on.)
Very important to nurture your relationship. Do not make the child more important. I agree with James. Also our children are not ours. They are Gods. How you treat eachother models everything to your children. James is very wise!!!!!
Why Jake are you micro managing this woman about packing?? ….She knows exactly when to pack…Just STOP 🛑….seriously…She doesn’t need you to do her thinking for her…
@ Thank you…Women are master multitaskers..Trust me…I’m saving you from tiny little micro bickering moments that are not even worth it …If you continue to needle her on this point it will annoy her….Just ask her if there is anything that you can help her with and if so needs she will tell you…We have a literal road map of the to do list in our head…💚
so true. It took my husband years to learn to ask "what do you need me to do" instead of making fun of me for packing ahead of time and making checklists.
@ 💯💯We are Multitasking Masters…We literally have 10 different jobs going on at one time; We are organized, efficient, balanced and focused Don’t you dare say anything to screw me up and make my thinking system malfunction.Go back into your compartmental place if I need you I will call you …Men are single compartment thinking at all times…😂
Non-exclusive to need to be understood, men have the need to command influence and acceptance irrespective of being understood or not. That's the "ah she loves me. She'd take a bullet for me just like I do. She walks the walk."
I agree we are feeling creatures and there are many feelings that are demanding and unloving. I think the problem is we do not understand what True love is. This couple the woman is very dominating in the relationship and he panders to her. Codependence is NEVER LOVE. We are often drawn to our partners through our injuries.
The husband very clearly feels threatened by the attorney. He is running through the entire list of passive-aggressive moves, extremely little eye-contact, acting indifferent, doing other things and acting bored while the attorney is talking, dismissive, disapproving and skeptical tone of voice, questioning him in a subtle condescending (not constructive) way about his failures and about being an eccentric and unique guy, and on and on. The attorney is picking up heavily on it, is mostly unaffected but definitely reacting to it and isn't ashamed to keep being himself.
@@jakenewfield Hey man, I didn't think you'd actually read the comment and I never intended to insult or criticize anyone directly. It was just my observation, otherwise it was a good podcast. I'll take my comment down. Sleep deprivation sucks.
no need to delete the comment! I appreciate the observation. I need to receive critical feedback. I shouldn't be pissy or passive-aggressive towards my guests, and I need the feedback to help me for the next time (ideally I'll get to bed earlier, too)
Anyone who’s EVER worked a conference or a trade show in Vegas (or anywhere big), and not having time to recover or pack with a baby… seriously? My answer would be “go yourself” if he didn’t respect my and the family’s needs. She’s thinking ahead!! Most men only think about themselves. If you had a live in mother, might be easier
You marriage will not survive if you treat your husband with missandry. View your partner as a human being and don't make it about yourself. Not considering the other side is is bad, you're doing worse than he is.
I dunno, sounds like the man said what he wanted, she said what she wanted. And she was pissed that he wanted to negotiate their desires. She's like, I said I don't want to, how dare you try to negotiate otherwise
I think Sexton was trying to give them benefit of doubt , but reality … he wasn’t thinking of going sooner because “he wanted more time” and she wasn’t trying “to make the return easier on him” … I think the truth is they both just wanted to be understood, but more importantly a bit of power assertion was beginning.. both sides. He wanted his way and she wanted to be stubborn ..the way it was presented initially was not how it really went down. They were probably both rude and dismissive of each others side.
Get him to pack in a day , i have a feeling he is not involved with the chores and the children or the housework, thats why he thinks one day is enough.
Some good points but James, the solution isn't men becoming more like women lol. Women need to understand men better too. We are not the same and never will be. Meet in the middle, not on the woman's side.
I love Sexton but defending abusive guilty people no matter what got them to that point just doesn’t fly with me seems more financial since all the clients are high paying
Unfortunately we all run out of things to say. Big fan of Sexton but he’s been on too many podcasts and says the same things. Which you have to do. Lol. Most people should just do one podcast, say their views and done. That’s why people lie the whole time. Want to come across more interesting and run out of things that they have actually done.
Dude be yourself. Stop being a pushover if your woman has burning desire for you she’ll stick around. If you have to worry about little things you’re doomed
Men lead, if she doesn't follow you to boston it's on her. And trying to convince is a disrespect of frame. Like this is non-exclusive to what Sexton said but at the end of the day you respect her for dishing out your insides for that decision her respect lies in following you irrespective of her opinion, just like her mother followed her father to america and my mother followed my father to canada. The best respect you can give her is continuing to be kind and strong to honor her sacrifice.
Timeline:
00:00 - Intro
00:46 - The Conflict
17:13 - How to FIX a marriage
28:42 - Male vs Female Gender Roles
34:19 - What women NEED
40:35 - How to deal with Grief
1:18:28 - How to be Authentic
I love how the guy who's job it is to help people end marriages seems like a better marriage counselor than most marriage counselors...
Agreed!
@@jakenewfield "People don't realize how much it takes to makes things easy". They become attached and tyrants to that hard process to make things not hard. It's mental bureaucracy. Lol. Relax, take it easy. But it's next to impossible to take people (Dentist) out of that frame who succeded professionally thanks to that frame. They will start thinking about "what did Sexton say? Okay now I gotta be more understanding. Omygosh I need to this I need to that". But they will do the same with brand new Sexton ammunition. That's withstanding fundamental stuff like "I need to fuck", and then she gotta fuck you there's no discussion on that that's next to the main reason you got with her, but that's out the modern frame. And your need to fuck can't subsidize, men and women aren't equal on almost everything, but the fact that you both work and bring money overshadows that fact. Like there's an easy frame that's the rule in every southeast asian family: "the mother decides everything realted to inside the home and the father decides everything outside the home" it's just an example but it should inspire you don't look to have a say in every subject it's wrong simply wrong. Ill leave you on a last dime: women dont understand men's intrinsic need for power. It cuts back to the lemon example of Sexton and the "Why" and the question at the beginning of when to to compromise to "happy wife happy life" and why we're two different species with different operating softwares, I let you meditate on that. Ask your wife on a dissent if she feels the need for respect and proof of serviance from you part, be surprised by the answer.
@@jakenewfield "People don't realize how much it takes to makes things easy". They become attached and tyrants to that hard process to make things not hard. It's mental bureaucracy. Lol. Relax, take it easy. But it's next to impossible to take people (Dentist) out of that frame who succeded professionally thanks to that frame. They will start thinking about "what did Sexton say? Okay now I gotta be more understanding. Omygosh I need to this I need to that". But they will do the same with brand new Sexton ammunition. That's withstanding fundamental stuff like "I need to fuck", and then she gotta fuck you there's no discussion on that that's next to the main reason you got with her, but that's out the modern frame. And your need to fuck can't subsidize, men and women aren't equal on almost everything, but the fact that you both work and bring money overshadows that fact. Like there's an easy frame that's the rule in every southeast asian family: "the mother decides everything realted to inside the home and the father decides everything outside the home" it's just an example but it should inspire you don't look to have a say in every subject it's wrong simply wrong. Ill leave you on a last dime: women dont understand men's intrinsic need for power. It cuts back to the lemon example of Sexton and the "Why" and the question at the beginning of when to to compromise to "happy wife happy life" and why we're two different species with different operating softwares, I let you meditate on that. Ask your wife on a dissent if she feels the need for respect and proof of serviance from you part, be surprised by the answer.
Yes!!
Depends on the marriage counselor. Some are not well trained, others are. I work with couples from time to time & it’s my job to be realistic with them.
James Sexton never disappoints. I could hear him over and over again. So much wisdom.
agreed!
It’s normal for relationships to encounter problems, but there’s always a way to navigate through them. My marriage faced major difficulties, but with the right support, my wife and I were able to solve our issues and fortify our bond. Solutions are possible if you’re committed to working together. Don’t give up-there’s always a solution.
I’m facing significant relationship problems and can’t stand the idea of losing her. My love and longing for my partner are profound, and I’m ready to do anything to restore our connection. I would greatly appreciate any advice or help you could give.
Moving on from someone you hold dear is invariably challenging, but in my experience, I was guided by a spiritual counselor who prevented the breakdown of my marriage. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
I appreciate your direction. I'll swiftly look her up online. Thanks. I'm hopeful that following this course of action will bring about positive changes for me too; her absence is deeply felt.
You should... I promise you will not regret it.
She’s a dentist and doing everything at home and you’re whining about packing time? Sorry to be blunt here: You need to put the work in. My husband and I had a lot of arguments when we had our second child. He wasn’t doing enough at home, I resented him and this totally killed my attraction for him. Financially we are pretty equal contributors and would be ok in a divorce and we almost got to that point. No one wants to parent their partner - it’s a complete turn off. She can leave if this continues and she will. Forget winning arguments (you’re also trying to win little anrguments with James and in the comments) and just be kinder. We have improved our relationship by being kinder in the ways we each needed. James is giving you priceless advice.
Absolutely my thoughts
agreed!
Have you considered things that you haven't been doing that killed his attraction for you? When guys are attracted to women, they move Heaven and Earth. If he wasn't doing things for you, perhaps you neglected his needs in some way.
@@aureatebingo! People only see one side and neglect the other side. It takes 2 to tango.
That's an amazing conversation especially because it's put in a real life situation. James speaking so insightful on one side and the lovely connection and vulnerability shown in the couple on the other. Sounds like a warm friendly meeting.
Thanks!
At 45:21 I cried and I just wanted to give James Sexton a hug. At 1:43 James is making a good point most people dont think about "How can I be a more present and caring person to my partner? They usually only care when their partner is already into someone else.
good points!
😂😂
Grief and tears are cleansing makes life more beautiful!!!!!! Humility and vulnerability are beautiful like after rain everything looks and smells more vibrant.
Make the dude pack and clean and prep for the baby and see how fast he needs two days
@@porcupine783 Hahahaha!
Still never get it. Going to work is far simpler than caring for a family and house all day every day. The shift never ends!
@GamingWithFusion Then don't do it. Its either worth it or it isn't to have kids. Hard is relative to value.
@porcupine783 men do it all the time. And we do it simpler and easier. Most of the things being addressed is more for the mother than the child. Putting things together at a place doesn't resonate from what I'm hearing and what I've seen in my life. There idea that men don't get it is sitcom logic. Dad's do as much or more for a huge if not the majority of American households. Now, is it to women's preferences, no, we're different and the needs and methods differ. But men do a damn fine job especially with record high single fathers. Keep an open mind and look around, you will see what I mean.
this!!!
I find it interesting that none of the 3 people have suggested compromise. If he wants to leave on Monday, then she should negotiate: While I'm working on Saturday he should have the laundry done, bags packed, all baby gear ready for travel and the house cleaned. Then she would be ready to have a quick turn around and travel without being overwhelmed!
good point!
Happy wife happy life..
James- "God, I hate that sentence"
lol
The worst
like it’s not true?
One of the best podcasts I’ve watched in a while. Really was able to get the best of James Sexton as well as the two hosts.
Thank you!
omg, watching james get misty eyed relating to the death of jake's youngest sister is just everything ❣
"I know she can do it a day"...well she may be can and she tell you straight in a face that she doesn't want to. And if you don't want to to stay for an extra day then offer her a help. Damn, just help her and you both will benefit
I was thinking the same thing. She's carrying the mental load of baby care, home care, etc. He's obviously not thinking of any of that!
I agree with you
@@acerpalmatum6446 you're right
@@88Oleksiy He did offer. Is it possible that you have some preconceived ideas of this is/would play out? He discussed dividing rolls. He seems very willing to help.
Thank you!!
James thanks for your wisdom.
Mr. Sexton You Give So Much To This World! Very Nice! 💫
I love this couple! How wise! I love how they help James Sexton with his grief and loss. Respect. True respect!
Thank you!
Great concept. Coach Sexton.. i love this idea.
I agree!
I NEED this man for marriage counselling!!
2:08:49 great photo😅
and thanks for having him, i need a new james podcast once every 6 motnhs on youtube
Can we get in the habit of saying Happy Spouse, Happy House..🏡 There are two people in the marriage……
I agree!
I love and agree with this. But I think Feminist ideals wont allow for this. To the vast majority of the world, the overarching paradigm and purpose of a relationship is for a man to cater to the woman ceaselessly until she inevitably decides to be frustrated that he’s not making her happy and leaves. I know it’s a bit jaded and cynical to say and I’m not saying this about this couple, just the state of affairs.
She looks good, takes care of two kids, has a great career and I don’t hear him talking about helping her with the chores instead trying to push her to get it done faster and he is going to burn her out and if she makes decent money and he doesn’t contribute to house chores to help then she doesn’t need him and love and intimacy is helping doing chores to unload stress not add to it.
That’s why they are together because he is a jerk. If he was a better guy she would have left
@@erwangaillard1637 lol I hope not!
I agree she's amazing
He literally said he would do the laundry. It is also not making assumptions based on your negative beliefs
This was so raw. I really enjoyed watching. Thanks so much for
I'm glad you enjoyed it!
James Sexton is a great example of a masculine man who is emotionally intelligent and empathetic. He definitely is better than other psychologists/psychiatrists. ❤
Thank you for this awesome podcast.
Thank you for watching it!
Only we can feel our feelings. Empathy is lovely
These suggestions aren't just great for romantic relationships but ALL relationships.
31:00
Him: I like to think I’m emotionally in tune
Her:🥴🤥
this was a good show to watch; to see a Divorce Lawyer talking to a couple who are not bitter with each other was informative
I knew James was going to say something about "happy wife, happy life." 😂❤
More of these please!!!❤
When I realized my husband was not againts me and just wanted the best for me, is when our relationship completely changed. James is so right
:)
james sexton is the male version of esther perel - what a legend!
"People don't realize how much it takes to makes things easy". They become attached and tyrants to that hard process to make things not hard. It's mental bureaucracy. Lol. Relax, take it easy. But it's next to impossible to take people (Dentist) out of that frame who succeded professionally thanks to that frame. They will start thinking about "what did Sexton say? Okay now I gotta be more understanding. Omygosh I need to this I need to that". But they will do the same with brand new Sexton ammunition. That's withstanding fundamental stuff like "I need to fuck", and then she gotta fuck you there's no discussion on that that's next to the main reason you got with her, but that's out the modern frame. And your need to fuck can't subsidize, men and women aren't equal on almost everything, but the fact that you both work and bring money overshadows that fact. Like there's an easy frame that's the rule in every southeast asian family: "the mother decides everything realted to inside the home and the father decides everything outside the home" it's just an example but it should inspire you don't look to have a say in every subject it's wrong simply wrong. Ill leave you on a last dime: women dont understand men's intrinsic need for respect. It cuts back to the lemon example of Sexton and I let you meditate on that.
Great analogy! So true!
@@Shangrila37 I agree!
I agree
Isn't she the cheating apologist?
just adore this conversation
I'm glad! :)
I'm exhausted and so happy to be single right now
"People don't realize how much it takes to makes things easy". They become attached and tyrants to that hard process to make things not hard. It's mental bureaucracy. Lol. Relax, take it easy. But it's next to impossible to take people (Dentist) out of that frame who succeded professionally thanks to that frame. They will start thinking about "what did Sexton say? Okay now I gotta be more understanding. Omygosh I need to this I need to that". But they will do the same with brand new Sexton ammunition. That's withstanding fundamental stuff like "I need to fuck", and then she gotta fuck you there's no discussion on that that's next to the main reason you got with her, but that's out the modern frame. And your need to fuck can't subsidize, men and women aren't equal on almost everything, but the fact that you both work and bring money overshadows that fact. Like there's an easy frame that's the rule in every southeast asian family: "the mother decides everything realted to inside the home and the father decides everything outside the home" it's just an example but it should inspire you don't look to have a say in every subject it's wrong simply wrong. Ill leave you on a last dime: women dont understand men's intrinsic need for respect. It cuts back to the lemon example of Sexton and I let you meditate on that.
lol
I felt like James was missing a lot of the conversation and Jake got the short end of this stick in this conversation. He was talking about leaving for the trip early vs leaving the trip later. And I am assuming that you have more family in boston than just your sister who passed away. What I hear is, After your sister passed away you went on a long journey of trying to find meaning in something that was awful. A solo journey, away from your family. You meet your now wife and move away, again, from your home base. In that time you brought a life into this world and thats when people want to be with their families the most. I think its important to remember that James is a divorce lawyer and not a psychologist.
I want to add that I'm only half way through at 56 minutes
yeah I think you are spot on
if I go on vacation I start packing a few months before the trip, with a packing list. And it isn't like I haven't traveled before. And I am only taking a carry on and a personal item like a backpack
I need to have my boyfriend listen to this cast....it will save me so much therapy money....
lol calling your wife dude is wild 😂
😢
Wow, i really love the conversation here. Deep stuff.
Thank you!
I totally agree with her because I do all those things as well.
This posdcast really deserves more love! So glad it was recommended to me and i was able to understand how to understand my partner and being the most compassion as we can be to learn as about each other's feeling. Thank you for this, i would definitely re-listen to it again when the similar situation faces and remind myself to be more understanding to my partner. ❤
I'm glad you enjoyed it!
please feel free to share this!
I LOVE that Chris just quoted Brandon Lee in the crow!!! “Mother is a name for God on the lips and hearts of all children”
Jim, good call getting regular couples to sit down and talk about reality. Maybe you can change legislation about family systems…
The attorney says itch other instead of each other 😂
lol!
1:19:30 Just be you. It's the only thing that nobody else can be. It's the most interesting thing you can be. 😊
thanks for bringing this part back to my attention. that was a great insight that James shared
@@jakenewfield so many gold nuggets ✨️ that was a great interview by all 3 of you!
thank you!
You are so inspiring
thank you!
"We are feeling creatures that somethimes think"🎉
I also thought that was a good line
I love all about this, it shows how Feminism, or if that word is triggering to anyone - breaking up role-grooming (which doesn't necessarilly mean that typical 'masculine' and 'feminine' attributes do not have their place and time when they are authentic) is truly great for everyone. Meeting each other as feeling human beings always is the essence of everything. Thanks guys!!
thank you!
The literal definition of feminism “the belief in social, economic, and political equality of the sexes.”
When it comes to running a household with a marital (or otherwise agreed upon partner) those individuals need to communicate and together agree upon they way they would best like to divide up the responsibilities.
The divorce laywer literally stated he believes in traditional gender roles.
@@stinkiaapje He talked about how there is a place for both and that the core of partnership and a happy life always is authenticity and talking about your emotions. Please point out what moment in the video you are referring to.
(And no matter what he said anyway, I'd still state that to me, the video showed what I commented on.)
This is incredible ❤
Thank you!
Very important to nurture your relationship. Do not make the child more important. I agree with James. Also our children are not ours. They are Gods.
How you treat eachother models everything to your children.
James is very wise!!!!!
“Uh-chuther” 💀😭
Why Jake are you micro managing this woman about packing?? ….She knows exactly when to pack…Just STOP 🛑….seriously…She doesn’t need you to do her thinking for her…
I think you are right
@ Thank you…Women are master multitaskers..Trust me…I’m saving you from tiny little micro bickering moments that are not even worth it …If you continue to needle her on this point it will annoy her….Just ask her if there is anything that you can help her with and if so needs she will tell you…We have a literal road map of the to do list in our head…💚
so true. It took my husband years to learn to ask "what do you need me to do" instead of making fun of me for packing ahead of time and making checklists.
@ 💯💯We are Multitasking Masters…We literally have 10 different jobs going on at one time; We are organized, efficient, balanced and focused Don’t you dare say anything to screw me up and make my thinking system malfunction.Go back into your compartmental place if I need you I will call you …Men are single compartment thinking at all times…😂
good luck y'all 💕
Thank you!
Non-exclusive to need to be understood, men have the need to command influence and acceptance irrespective of being understood or not. That's the "ah she loves me. She'd take a bullet for me just like I do. She walks the walk."
That lemon part was glossed over a little too fast.
yeah that was a good analogy
I agree we are feeling creatures and there are many feelings that are demanding and unloving. I think the problem is we do not understand what True love is.
This couple the woman is very dominating in the relationship and he panders to her. Codependence is NEVER LOVE.
We are often drawn to our partners through our injuries.
This whole video feels like a Marvel villian finally using his powers for goodbye
Beautiful wife brother, proud of you!
James forgot this was a three person conversation 😂 everyone else was ahum ahum right yea ahum good point yea
Being with a person you like and love is way more important than sex and lust in the long term .
The husband very clearly feels threatened by the attorney. He is running through the entire list of passive-aggressive moves, extremely little eye-contact, acting indifferent, doing other things and acting bored while the attorney is talking, dismissive, disapproving and skeptical tone of voice, questioning him in a subtle condescending (not constructive) way about his failures and about being an eccentric and unique guy, and on and on. The attorney is picking up heavily on it, is mostly unaffected but definitely reacting to it and isn't ashamed to keep being himself.
yeah I think I was sleep deprived and acting irritable... which is really a shame.
I really hope that my sleep deprivation/irritability wasn't noticeable... but clearly it was
@@jakenewfield Hey man, I didn't think you'd actually read the comment and I never intended to insult or criticize anyone directly. It was just my observation, otherwise it was a good podcast. I'll take my comment down. Sleep deprivation sucks.
no need to delete the comment! I appreciate the observation. I need to receive critical feedback. I shouldn't be pissy or passive-aggressive towards my guests, and I need the feedback to help me for the next time (ideally I'll get to bed earlier, too)
Have you considered the fact the attorney at times pathologises the man for being...a man and not more like a woman?
If I hear “itch other” again I’m gonna freak out
lol!
Omg, less than 3 minutes in…I was like, “typical dad to an infant!”. And the fact that he has more than one child too.
I'm the 2nd child that I was referring to
Anyone who’s EVER worked a conference or a trade show in Vegas (or anywhere big), and not having time to recover or pack with a baby… seriously? My answer would be “go yourself” if he didn’t respect my and the family’s needs. She’s thinking ahead!! Most men only think about themselves. If you had a live in mother, might be easier
You marriage will not survive if you treat your husband with missandry. View your partner as a human being and don't make it about yourself. Not considering the other side is is bad, you're doing worse than he is.
I dunno, sounds like the man said what he wanted, she said what she wanted. And she was pissed that he wanted to negotiate their desires. She's like, I said I don't want to, how dare you try to negotiate otherwise
lol trust me, Christina is the more rational one here!
What was your favorite part of the interview? Let me know!
I think Sexton was trying to give them benefit of doubt , but reality … he wasn’t thinking of going sooner because “he wanted more time” and she wasn’t trying “to make the return easier on him” … I think the truth is they both just wanted to be understood, but more importantly a bit of power assertion was beginning.. both sides. He wanted his way and she wanted to be stubborn ..the way it was presented initially was not how it really went down. They were probably both rude and dismissive of each others side.
Yo…you need two days to pack. 9 month old and all the way from one coast to another? Bro, you’re coconuts!
lol!
I’m sorry but I would definitely prefer to buy an audio book if he’s just gonna not let them speak. My goodness they can’t get a thought out.
56:54 Are you sure James?
lol
takes a lot of guts to become a dentist especially because the debt 😭 that’s a career where you really got to see it through
james sure is a talker 😂
Get him to pack in a day , i have a feeling he is not involved with the chores and the children or the housework, thats why he thinks one day is enough.
Some good points but James, the solution isn't men becoming more like women lol. Women need to understand men better too. We are not the same and never will be. Meet in the middle, not on the woman's side.
I love Sexton but defending abusive guilty people no matter what got them to that point just doesn’t fly with me seems more financial since all the clients are high paying
“half a day” I’d divorce the attorney just for being so ignorant
lol
This is one of the worst click-bait titles ive seen in years
can you give me a recommendation of what to change the title to? I'll change it
I can already tell she has no respect for this guy. It’s so obvious to me. Wont last
Unfortunately we all run out of things to say.
Big fan of Sexton but he’s been on too many podcasts and says the same things. Which you have to do. Lol.
Most people should just do one podcast, say their views and done.
That’s why people lie the whole time. Want to come across more interesting and run out of things that they have actually done.
27 mins in...I dont give a shit what day you two leave....just leave the conversation and move on.
lol!
Dude be yourself. Stop being a pushover if your woman has burning desire for you she’ll stick around. If you have to worry about little things you’re doomed
🌟
Let him Do the chores and pack and look after the child ,he couldn’t do it
true
Men lead, if she doesn't follow you to boston it's on her. And trying to convince is a disrespect of frame. Like this is non-exclusive to what Sexton said but at the end of the day you respect her for dishing out your insides for that decision her respect lies in following you irrespective of her opinion, just like her mother followed her father to america and my mother followed my father to canada. The best respect you can give her is continuing to be kind and strong to honor her sacrifice.
Like at least and consider subscribing to Jake. This man is releasing video after video and needs the support.
Thank you!!!