Insanely Overpriced Products (PART III)
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- Опубліковано 2 лют 2021
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Simon's Social Media:
Twitter: / simonwhistler
Instagram: / simonwhistler
Simon's Other Channels:
TodayIFoundOut: / todayifoundout
TopTenz: / toptenznet
Biographics: / @biographics
Visual Politik: / @visualpolitiken
Highlight History: / @highlighthistory
Geographics: / @geographicstravel
Go to bit.ly/noom_businessblaze to get your online evaluation so that you can start taking care of your health with Noom today!
Dude I love your bids but I want some more vids that feature death. Just to make it more interesting for you they can be deaths caused by subway
@@youdontneedtoknow6621 What about in a subway while eating subway?
@@JoshLyons01 anything so long as the death vids keep on coming
So is it just you ranting around a basement office all day long? U OK hun? Everything OK at home?
The US version of your noodles is Ramen. You can sometimes get them for 4/$1. Any idiot who pays more than a couple hundred for a purse (ONLY IF it's made out of actual leather) deserves to be ripped off. If it's not made of leather, my max price is $40 (assuming I'm feeling generous).
Danny: *Writes normal length intro*
Simon: *Goes off on many crazy tangents*
Also Simon: Jesus Danny, how long's this intro?!
Every. Damn. Time.
That's THE BLAZE and we love it 😍 😂
that's the reason we are here, tell me otherwise xD
it's alll about the tangents xD
That's why we're here
Nice try Danny get back in the basement!
Stop making fake UA-cam accounts and make shorter intros!! Because Simon is an angel who never gets distracted or goes on tangents..
That actually reminds me of the time when I ate a bug .....*goes off on tangent.....
I like how Simon's 'no-yelling' policy lasted less than 1 video
I wondered about that too, then saw the post that observed that this video is out of order.
If im not mistaken then you can hear that his voice is a little differen
This video was probably recorded before the previous one.
The videos aren’t recorded in the order they are released, this was probably done before hand.
@@johngerken4263 recording this video probably inspired Simon to go see the doctor in the first place.
I feel like about 40% of every Business Blaze episode is Simon being surprised that he's still reading the intro...
I feel like about 40% of every Business Blaze episode is just Danny's intro.
And?
Litchrally
At 10 minutes into a 35 minute video it’s closer to 28%
Bender from Futurama: "Im 40% intro!"
"If you're better educated, you make better decisions". Bullshit. I have a Master's degree and I haven't made a good decision since 1993.
Forgive me but I have to ask, was the degree one of them?
lol, I feel that
@@OtakuUnitedStudio you too, huh?
I, too, am highly educated, and I make mostly terrible decisions. My wife has even more degrees than I, and ... no, on second thought, I won’t go there. All of her decisions are fine, probably.
If you can remove the propaganda, you make MUCH better decisions. Once I figured the 2 party system in America consists of rich old men switching parties for a win, it explained most of the "crises" that American politicians have been going on about for 40+ goddamn years.
Who remembers Simon at the start of this channel questioning if ANY sponsor would pay here? Business LEGEND 🤣
sponsors got BLAZED boiiii xD
If he gets really desperate, there is always RAID SHADOW LEGENDS!!!!!
@@StevenLockey NEVER!!
@@Sarah_Grant Come, feel the lure of the RAID (as it grabs your wallet) 🤣
Loving that Sam has now gone beyond memes and is now adding in actual messages
All a part of his cry for help...from the basement....
@@Sarah_Grant ono , Simon got him too? Well, at least now Danny has company ....or someone to help him break out lol
I thought Matthew was his company
“I’m not rich” Says the guy with slave basement money.
"basement slave" works better in that statement
It's a little-known fact that all 2-storey walkup flats in
the Czech Republic must have slave basements by
legal decree.
@@DRUKENHOBO nah because the slave it’s free. It’s the basement that costs. That’s how they get you.
@@magnificentfailure2390 you’re thinking of the Slav basement
@@adzyw easy mistake to make, they still have serfdom right?
"All of these problems are just solved by not caring." this statement just saved me thousands of dollars in therapists fees. Thank you Simon!!
That's is the most profound statement I ever heard. And it gets more relevant as time goes on.
Welcome to today...
Simon: "I'm not rich."
Also Simon: "I have no idea how much anything costs."
Also Simon : "Moved from UK to Prague"
@@irekaias yeah apartments in Prague are hella expensive, tho I am not sure If UK is any better, I think not... maybe it's cheaper for him who knows
@@irekaias lol
@@AndrewMitchell123 Factually I think there is a chance that is at least it is cheaper than London... But we don't come to this channels for fact, we come for the BURNS hahahaha
And that's why he's not rich
"All of these problem are solve just by not caring"
Words to live by
That should be Simon’s next tee shirt.
"Obviously I don't do that with YOUR cards." That made laugh so loud.
One day, someone's going to make a whole video of Simon saying things like how he loves cocaine, Nazis, and domestic abuse.
Allegedly.
yeah, the fact he wasn't yet cancelled is incredible
but that's maybe bcs of his contacts so that ppl are afraid to cancel him, also he has a lot of coke so he can buy ppl
ALLEGEDLY xD
#cancelsimon
I'd be happy with a "Simon says something NSFW" super-cut.
We genuinely need a Business Blaze where Danny writes his life story.
More like a spin-off series 😂
You misspelled Biographics
we all know it should be on this channel and not Biographics unless he makes a merge video
Danny sounds like he has experienced quite the life. Not enough paper on this planet to write that down
And Simon can punctuate the story saying “Jesus Danny” a thousand times
Danny's poetry is evil, cruel and hilarious; he deserves a couple extra, moldy rations.
I gave him a dead horse to eat.
He started with its feet.
Ah, the poetry.
I have never laughed for as long and as hard as I did when Simon said "I see it in bold down here" and pointed at his bald head 😂😂 13:56
Simon- "Your body is a temple."
Also Simon- "COCAINEEEE"
My body is a temple! Old , falling apart, and most likely haunted.
"Cocaine" yes please
Also Simon: "Cocaine is a gift from the gods."
It all checks out in the end.
@@Riwillion ALLEGEDLY.
Ali Casper Adding cocaine to any weight reducing diet is helpful.
Still waiting for the Business Blaze x Biographics going over Danny's life
April 1st.
@@nickmoney April 1st lol
The biggest crossover event since some Marvel shit I've not heard of.
@@brainblaze6526 except we are still waiting for this, fact boi
Whenever Simon talks about his wife his entire face just changes into happiness and it is allegedly absolutely amazing, in my opinion.
Starting a petition for a video: "The 10 wackiest most bonkers things Danny has done he can't possibly expect us to believe"
Danny has had a very interesting life..Allegedly
My body is a crumbling a broken temple, but I am the god for whom it was made and this god wants coke zero and chicken nuggets.
Apparently we observe the same rituals 🤷🏼♀️
You too, huh?
this explains why I didn't 'remember' the cauliflower steak reference from the previous video
True OG Buisness Blaze Legends aren't bound by the time space continuum
Your not the only one!
That explains why he is yelling up a froth about the greeting card industry just a day after he told us his doctor said not to yell anymore...
When it starts to wrap up and you get ready to go to the next video.
Simon: "Jesus Christ, was this the introduction Danny?"
The number of emails I have with Danny being like "DANNY WHY SO LONG MY LEGS ARE TIRED" is high.
And by emails I mean yelling into the basement.
@@brainblaze6526 "hold on"
"pot noodles, what's that? Guess I'll Google it.."
Leave UA-cam, vid stops bc I've also already got maps open, and Google it to see it's just cup of noodles. Only to then return and have Sam damn insert a pic of them ten seconds later.. damnit.
I had to pause and go look up what pot noodles are too, we are on the same page lol.
😂
I guessed it was some variant of Maggie noodles. Didn't seem important enough for me to care.
I've been on the Internet for too long.
The Japanese and Koreans have some pretty good instant noodles. They aren't as good as fresh of course but edible.
@@kaltaron1284 That is absolutely true, I've had instant noodles from both Korea and Japan, and I have some pretty good Nissin Japanese ones ready for when I get a craving for them again :D. But at least the ones normally available in the Netherlands are quite bad in comparison. However some Indonesian ones are quite good as well, not quite as good as Japanese or Korean but fairly close - definitely edible to me.
When I say 'the other day' it could range from five minutes ago or a few moments after my birth.
Same.
All the new noise next door is actually people slowly drilling through the wall to free Danny😁
“Dammit, our covers blown! Switch to Plan E! Be strong, Comrade Danny. We shall rescue you!”
Or is it Danny drilling out...but where would Danny get a drill... yes you're right... its some one drilling in...
I love watching from the start of this channel, and watching Simon slowly reveal his true self. Going from "business casual" to "f*** this cup!" 😂
“All your problems can be solved by not caring” Tshirt. Take my money, please.
“From holiday”
A holiday you stole from Danny
It was stolen fair and square, I’m sure your father would’ve agreed
*redistributed
Now I want a line of Simon Whistler greeting cards
They should have a photo of Danny getting whipped
Yes!
Lmfao
Here’s a card!
(Inside)
Would’ve gotten you something better but-COoCAaAIinE!!
I love how sams poem doesn’t come close to rhyming lol
And /thewhistlermister doesn't lead anywhere 😔
Sorry to be that guy, but poems don't have to rhyme. Many poems are based on the rhythm of the words and syllables.
@@nataliestanchevski4628 But the initial challenge was to rhyme the word corpse.
I mean, it was a slant rhyme, if those count
@@nataliestanchevski4628 I know but the point was it’s hard to rhyme lol
10:10 - Chapter 1 - Greetings from scamsville
17:35 - Mid roll ads
22:25 - Chapter 2 - Bags & rocks
27:40 - Chapter 3 - What is a domain name ?
31:35 - Chapter 4 - A parking spot in manhattan
Beloved family member, ye
Now a rotting corpse
We cast you now into the sea
To feed the seals and porps.
😂 Wicked funny, cool, thanks for the laugh
Decent arrempt ✌️
wtf is porps lol
sick poem tho xD
Clearly you have a future at Hallmark 😁
Porps? Like Porpoise? Lol Solid poem
So the cauliflower joke from the last vid is referring to this one got ya.
I should probably make some sort of effort to publish things in order or something.
@@brainblaze6526 NO! ONLY POST THEM IN RANDOM ORDERS!
@@brainblaze6526 you're still better at it than I am.
I haven't even recorded my first yet! 😋
@@brainblaze6526 true legends aren't bound by linear time
@@brainblaze6526 you definitely shouldn't.
Simon was genuinely excited that Danny included a poem
You missed an opportunity, instead of the wife beater shirt, you should have shown a Stella beer. OG buisness blaze
OGBB
Conspiracy theory time: We think Simon is holding Danny hostage in the basement when reality, Simon is trapped in the basement.
With Simon trapped in the basement making videos,Danny gives him scripts to read and to cover it up, he makes Simon joke that Danny is locked in the basement.
Twisted logic....I love it
Diabolical 😈
Holy shit it makes sense
And when there's a murder, he can just go over it on Casual Criminalist.
You want proof? In one of the videos he looks at an upward angle while talking about the dog walking by the window. QED
The blaze ignites at 5am here in Australia, best way to start me day.
Then you watch Simon? 🤣🤣
Well I'm sure it's better than the blazes you guys are used to.
Sydney here, you?
@@abridgeburner9927 SE Vic,
@@abridgeburner9927 Townsville.
“I like my family. Some would even say ‘love.’ But we’re British so, of course, none of those would be members of my family.” Is how I thought that was going to end.
It’s called Vasovagal syncope, Danny fainted from seeing himself bleeding. Allegedly.
I fire up today's Business Blaze, open my freshly cooked hand-delivered pizza, and Simon goes "Woahwoahwoahwoahwoahwoahwoah........." and into a Noom ad on eating healthily, no, I will not, I am having this pizza, even if it results in me dying on the shitter like Elvis, I'm having this glorious pizza... :P
On with the show now... :P
Last video: I do *not* remember that steak joke
This video: Ooooh. Simon uploaded out of order again
Classic dickhead move Whistler.
Simon: read Danny's poem
Danny: writes poem
Sam: creates background music & make the video black and white
Just magical
* next week simon creates another channel about reading poetry 😂😂😂
That stack of red solo cups is driving him mad with power. I love it!
Simons been getting these business blaze videos out at breakneck speed! Keep'em coming!!
Danny got hold of Simon's coke stash and is working at super speed! Allegedly.
Don't know if I'm the only one, but Business Blaze greeting cards with Danny's poetry sounds like a good idea
roses are red,
violets are blue
im here in the basement
thinking of you
What about a business blaze blazer?
If those existed, I might start actually giving cards again!
And when you open it up it can play a Yoko Ono song on loop
Roses are red
Danny loves rhymin'
Smash that dislike
Cancel Simon
this last couple of weeks has been wild for legends!
LEGENDS UNITE
I've watched so many Simon vids be it BB Bio Geo Mega Side .... I think I've missed a couple lol
If I actually needed a program like noom, this was the advertisement that would have had me buying it outright. Absolutely Epic.
"I'll just tell a bit of a personal story" as if you don't do that for at least 60% of every Business Blaze 😂
You need a "This card is bullshit" greeting card.
I would buy that
"You are receiving this card because I don't like you enough to get you a gift"
@@brainblaze6526 Also...
Poetry is dead
What is wrong with you, Danny?
Get it together
I want to see a biographic on Simon but his wife hosts and writes the script.
just wanna thank ya simon, since my fiance left, business blaze over the past few months is one of the only things that put a smile on my face. you guys are a dream team. keep it up
I’m assuming (hoping) this video was filmed before Simon realized that he has vocal damage.
indeed
The one and only time Noom sponsors Business Blaze.
Oh so THIS is where the cauliflower steak thing came from! In the last video Simon said it was an OG reference and I thought I'd missed a video!
Simon made a cauliflower steak business blaze reference on the last video and I was really confused, but it turns out Simon is just so intellectually ahead of me that he saw it coming in the next video.
When I hear Big Money all I hear is “Save Big Money at Menards!”
A fellow (at least former) midwesterner, eh? That's the bare facts, folks!
Simon, this is your best channel BY FAR
"I reacted like that because im really into domestic abuse" LMAO keep it up and CANCEL SIMON
Yeah, but the meme should have been a Stella
this is his only channel I watch on the regular.
SMASH that dislike button xD
Today I Found out, Simon doesn't weigh his vegetables.
I was born and raised on a dairy farm and we always had real food... Imagine my reaction when I was introduced to Ramen noodle cups in college... I literally spit it out and thought my friend had lost her mind. She had an affinity for the (somehow) slimey salty cardboard crap in a cup...
I don’t want a Business Blaze T-Shirt. I want a Brilliant Business Blaze Blazer!
When you’re preparing to blaze by yourself and then Simon gives us a business blaze perfect timing! Keep calm and blaze on
Business blaze notification is my sign to start the days blazing
@@sleedog11 I mean life is enough reason for me but business blaze is my excuse 😂
@@brittanywoodman6559 dran right
I love how Simon called the cauliflower steak a reference in the last video and I was confused af but now it was cleared up in this one. XD
This is one channel that watching previous vids will exponentially increase the enjoyment. So. Many. Throwbacks. And it's Simon [&Danny and Sam of course] so they're great fun.
Same! I have watched all the videos for the life of me couldn't remember that one
Some channels don't like inside jokes. I appreciate that this channel does them and refers to them before they've been told the first time. It's glorious.
My uncle’s body
is now a Corpse
I’m so excited
I get his Porsche (American pronunciation)
Simon talking of his Larder.
Me thinking of an old Sovjet Offroad car.
That's a Lada.
@@ericg7044 Sounds rather similar when spoken
I believe you're thinking Lada, the Soviet car. Which sounds like "larder" for those with r-dropping accents.
Bet you will freak out when you learn how many chemicals are in a banana.
This reminds me of a reddit post where someone posted the chemical composition of an apple and claimed it was what was in the vaccines basically baiting a bunch of anti vaxers into making themselves look stupid when it was revealed what it actually was.
@Brandon Quist one hundred percent of people who have ingested DMHO eventually died. Most of those who have inhaled it will only survive with immediate emergency treatment. It causes rust on ferrous alloys and causes organic matter to decay more easily. Plus, it's been consumed by every tyrant, criminal, and serial killer ever. And on top of that, the only real restrictions on it are in areas where corporations have ownership of it so they can force others to purchase it even of they don't want to.
Fuck bananas. Trying to poison us all.
Everything is chemicals. Literally everything.
I typically get a small print from a local artist that fits in an envelope. Then write a handwritten note on the back.
I typically fart in the general direction of whoever has a birthday, except if it's my mom. Then I do absolutely nothing. All my friends and family live thousands of miles from me so it's just symbolic - but I did briefly think of them while letting off that stinker.
I just write on my friends forehead it saves on cost. #SmartThink
Miss Manners is the pen name of Judith Martin. She's an etiquette columnist who was very popular when printed newspapers were also very popular, and has a curious mixture of tradition and modern practicality on many issues surrounding social interaction. (Or, at least, her kids do, as she's in her 80s and can't be arsed to write her own columns most of the time anymore. So her kids do.) She also disdained greeting cards, although give the demure image she promoted of herself she'd never run around the room screaming about them. She much preferred a handwritten note, even a brief, formulaic one.
I used to cook for severely over priced weddings and I've made so many cauliflower "steaks" and fried buffalo cauliflower hors d'oeuvres. They were actually one of the less sad vegan entrée alternatives, usually it was just whatever vegetable everyone else got but a lot of it but the grill marks on a slab of something and a veg looked better.
Simon, I once heard of people buying "oxygenated" water. People will buy anything.
They put O in H2O? Exciting 😅😅😅
@@snood1205 pretty sure that's legal 😅. I've seen so much expensive water it's nuts. I drink a lot of water. It comes from the tap no need to buy it 😅. If I take a deep breath before I drink it's with extra oxygen
@@snood1205 ikr. First thought when I saw it was "wrong aisle, first aid is aisle 9". Immediately followed by "GDI, too many people are gonna fall for this crap...marketers are true villains using people's own ignorance against them.
@@stephjovi My fish has oxygenated water too, wouldn't drink it, but that's cuz it's fishy's home.
@@andiward7068 well sure they have those oxygen pumps right? Use that on tap water bottle it sell it for $30 dollars a bottle as oxygenated water 😅. If people ask you were the idea came from you can say you watch a blazing business channel for ideas 🤪
Simon calling out our sweaty boy Salvia
Now that's the crossover that gets it right
Holy shit, is it just me or is Simons ADHD off the charts for this one. I like it!
Yep..us people with ADHD are the best at these types of things ( This channel and his energy )
Started watching yesterday's Blaze and recommended video on the side was this one. LEGEND.
Dang. I grew up near San Bernardino. If I'd known how valuable the rocks were there I might have never moved away.
Danny escaped his imprisonment, wrestled Simon, won, imprisoned him instead of him and now he is forcing him to film and read his scripts everyday.
This is legit one of the best comments I've seen in the bb channel so far
How much did Simon pay you to make this fake news?
Shhh...I don't want the Simon clones from the other channels finding out and coming to free him!
This isn't any ordinary Business Blaze, this is a Marks and Spencer Business Blaze...
legend
The red cup perched jauntily on the bulb behind you is a nice touch. I do think it belongs there and adds to the ambience. Bravo.
Woah woah woah woah woah....... Time to blaze while I blaze. 😜😂 Love the videos Simon Sam and Danny! 🤘
Cheers mate, hope you’re smoking on some good shit.
Apathy doesn't solve problems so much as dissolve them.
10:03 you should do a show where it's introduction the whole way, and then you end the episode.
Sam's meme game has been top notch, lately! Thanks, Sam! 👍
I’m very happy with the frequency of business blaze uploads.
Give me more now.
I shouldn't watch business blaze while eating. The wife beater shirt! Lol
I do that too. "The Other Day" is anywhere from yesterday to 3 years ago.
Simon kinda sorta admitting he doesn’t know how to use the scales in the store makes me laugh 😂
But scales are so easy to use! Well, with the exception of the really exotic ones.
My favourite greeting card poem:
"Thoughtful observation
About the passage of time..
Platitude, platitude, platitude;
And emotional ending rhyme."
Perfect! 😄 #chef's kiss in over-the-top BB style#
I love how I am drawing a guy eating cake and just hear "do you want to get a better eating habit?"
Best part is the drawings expression which is like "wait what" while putting a piece of cake in his mouth.
The thing I love about this channel is that Simon is totally by himself when he films these. Yet ,he behaves as though he's talking to a friend.
I think Danny could have a MacGyver moment where he fashions a rudimentary weapon from the ragged edge of a Fray Bentos pie lid and slices through his bonds to escape to glorious freedom, this may also be a fever dream from the copious amount of additives in Pot Noodles
The boy with the blaze is firing out the videos recently
On behalf of the czech people, I would like to congratulate Simon on his really rather good pronunciation of "tři" at 0:46.
A coworker and I were facing layoff at the turn of the century, and he was brainstorming ideas to make money without really working. His best was varnished tumbleweeds. He was sure Japanese gardeners would snap them up as very Zen.
The fray bentos pie is how Simon got Danny into the basement and addicted to that sweet sweat columbian Blaze
That's not true...Allegedly
Old school cartoon style. Big basket with a stick holding it up, string holding the stick, with that pie sitting under it.
I feel this is Simon’s best blaze.
legit the best channel on youtube guys. honestly pulled me through my darkest days. Thank you
the british pound is actually based on the value of a pound of cauliflower
The Cauliflower Standard.
Do you have to change that to broccoli when travelling?.
@@bombercountyblues That's when you go to Europe. Pretty sure the US use crisps/chips.
MORE YELLING I WANT SIMON UNHINGED!
There's clearly a gap in the market for vegan leather wrapped rocks.
Non-gmo, gluten free, fair trade, handmade, vegan, imported, leather wrapped rocks
Out of everything in the video, the most shocking part is Simon knowing Gaelic.
Every episode of Business Blaze is another step into the deep dark recesses of Danny's life.