Things that I've found to make my anxiety experience a lot worse: 1) Caffeine (I'm sensitive to it. I had to cut out coffee and switch to green tea to lessen the amount of caffeine I get) 2) Eating too late (It would impact my sleep, I would have bad dreams sometimes.) 3) Rushing (I learned from mindfulness books like "30 Days to Reduce Stress" by Harper Daniels to slow down and let go) 4) Keeping things in (Journaling has been a life saver at times. Sometimes I'll get it all out on paper and throw it away) 5) Not setting boundaries or maintaining boundaries (I had to learn the hard way that I didn't have any boundaries and people would use me up, but I was letting it happen) 6) Related to #5, having bad relationships. Tolerating toxic people and people who are overly emotional. 7) Listening to too much negative stuff in terms of news and entertainment.
My watch just gave me a high stress alert watching this vid ...! Actually was high already, applying for jobs. The face it to break it, like a muscle - use it or lose it. Shape it or be shaped by it. My fave analogy is mountain v valley, you climb the mountain to get the view, and to get to the next i.e. better valley. You can stop for a rest anytime. Take small steps. Stay on an easy path sometimes. But keep climbing.
Hi Julia! Senior Shifter Chris is here! I love this video! This Sneaky Thing Makes Anxiety Worse This video really hits home to me. I know deep down; this is what is still causing me to be stuck. However, I have made small progress so that is a start. I think just by watching this video is the start today I am going to change that. It made me realize that I can accept all my feelings including the uncomfortable ones like anxiety. I know I have some decisions in my life I need to make, and like you said about our brains liking our same daily routines because it knows it is “safe” and keeping us alive, so I must tell my brain that some uncomfortable feelings is necessary to make a change. I can give my brain evidence of that I have done that before to help overcome anxiety.
Here are my notes: This Sneaky Thing Makes Anxiety Worse Thursday, November 9, 2023 8:35 AM When you try to avoid anxiety, you avoid certain things, or going to places, or try new things or interact with certain people. It tells your brain you cannot handle feeling anxious.
When we only focus on not feeling anxious, we miss out on life.
You can ground yourself, have healthy self-talk and encourage yourself to do something with the anxiety
Courage doesn't happen unless there is something to fear
Tell your brain you're in charge, your anxiety isn't.
The more you do things that typically make you feel anxious, the less anxious they are going to make you feel because you are showing your brain that it is safe. That it is okay, and you can handle and do it.
If you don't act out and meet new people to avoid anxiety, you will miss out on relationships with people because all relationships come with some level of anxiety and difficult feelings.
Face it until you break it.
If you fear change, even good change that you want, that is just the primitive way your brain is trying to keep you alive.
It is the unwillingness to feel anxiety that often keeps us most stuck.
QUESTIONS:
1. How has your unwillingness to feel anxious have been taking away from your life, and the life you want to be living? Unfortunately, yes, I have been in so many areas avoiding things, although I have made small progress. Progress, not perfection.
2. What kind of life do you even want? One of acceptance of all my feelings so that I can have a life that I am taking risks, trying new things, meeting new people and exploring new places.
3. What might you be willing to feel along the way to creating that life you want? All the feelings: anxiety, courage, hopefulness, failure…etc.
4. Are you willing to bring along anxiety with you? Yes, now that I understand that facing it until I break it is a way to handle life. I can do the things that cause anxiety repeatedly to the point where it no longer feels anxious.
E.G: I developed driving anxiety and over time I started to drive again to the point where it doesn't give me as much anxiety anymore.
I can also remind my brain of that example so that I can use it as proof that I can do hard things, even things that give me anxiety, and that when I do it often, it won't be as anxious anymore.
I am someone who has worried about anxiety all my life. Now, as an adult in my late 40s I am learning to deal with my anxiety and nervousness when in social situations. Thankfully I have professional help to get through this.
Having read all of the comments, most everything makes sense in concern to neurological science and basic principles, however i believe that is far different from basic thought and understanding common sense. I will say that being able to read certain feelings and emotions is not always my greatest strength (even with my proficient knowledge), but i will admit that its really up to us as the individual to want to talk about the anxiety and become aware of it - in and of itself - even if it doesn't make sense. I believe anxiety exists to help protect the ego. But that doesn't mean that bliss and inspiration are never around the corner - because there are always amazing vids and podcasts to listen to - and honestly thats really what makes all of us and the things that we do all the more interesting. What is difficult for me to accept however is that when somebody says 'anxiety' can never be conqured. It can. But depending if the specific person or client has a mood disorder or something like PTSD - that is totally understandable. And anxiety disorders of course. What we can all realize is that even if none of us interprets everything the same; we can all choose to educate ourselves and not judge one another based on our heritage, our social interactions, world issues, natural upbringing, and whatever resources are at our disposal.
Been trying to avoid feeing anxiety by not going out, not wanting to communicate with my parents, not suggesting places to go together. It mainly stems from a fear of my parents judging me about my decision, as they have a habit of being negative. I don't have a driver's license yet so I need them to take me to places not accessible through transit. I want to start letting myself feel anxiety and remind myself I will be okay, and any judgements made by my parents is just their opinion, not a fact.
Hi JKC Thank you for this upliftment and awareness in understanding one of the most basic drives in our nature as humans! Fear feeling is important and MUST be controlled and it is a big task. Fear is based on expectation, expectations are formed by imagination and sense of reality. Being able to navigate these thoughts and instincts is a big task for one's judgment! You provide a guide that is valuable.....THANK YOU!
(Singing.) Oh a spoonful of avoidance helps anxiety get worse! Anxiety get worse, anxiety get worse. Oh yes a spoonful of avoidance helps anxiety get worse. In the mostly frightful way!
I am actually less anxious around people I don't know than people I do know. I have tried facing my anxiety and it doesn't work, I still get anxious and I worry about people noticing my anxiety and calling me out on it because they have done that in the past and then I get embarrassed and want to hide.
if i feel anxious. i always talk to my inner child. coz I think shes not feel safe or scared being alone again. after talking i feel comfortable and safe. ❤
For exposure to work the experience must be seen as a success or you just reinforce the anxiety. That why it has not worked for me. I freeze and become mute. This takes 5 minutes to be release from. By then am exhausted.
I have only just subscribed - I quite value your content. But as an aside, it's incredible that having a hubby or someone tech-savvy helps you make these videos...Incidentally, - you are desensitising your HPA axis. ACT theory is what is being described here. Not original Of course, anxiety is normal when entering any new situation,- but this is experienced on a continuum. Those at the extreme to those who never experienced it in a very minor way. ACT is associated with moving towards your values..despite your anxiety. However, ACT acceptance is not "white knuckling it" - as also rather contradictory, is what is being expressed here.
But does that mean you have to continue being in a toxic environment full of hate and gossip and manuplation? Also I cut people off who are constantly breaking my boundaries even when you tell them over n over that you don't like it, does that mean am running away?
Things that I've found to make my anxiety experience a lot worse:
1) Caffeine (I'm sensitive to it. I had to cut out coffee and switch to green tea to lessen the amount of caffeine I get)
2) Eating too late (It would impact my sleep, I would have bad dreams sometimes.)
3) Rushing (I learned from mindfulness books like "30 Days to Reduce Stress" by Harper Daniels to slow down and let go)
4) Keeping things in (Journaling has been a life saver at times. Sometimes I'll get it all out on paper and throw it away)
5) Not setting boundaries or maintaining boundaries (I had to learn the hard way that I didn't have any boundaries and people would use me up, but I was letting it happen)
6) Related to #5, having bad relationships. Tolerating toxic people and people who are overly emotional.
7) Listening to too much negative stuff in terms of news and entertainment.
GREAT list. Thanks for this.
It’s ok to feel uncomfortable, acknowledge anxiety & let go. Be courageous, feel the fear & do it anyway, thank you Julia. ❤
you got it!
Feel like Julia is a superhero shielding me from anxiety 😂Pushed back against it this year, and know who to thank :)
celebrating you showing up for you Chris🙌🏻
My watch just gave me a high stress alert watching this vid ...!
Actually was high already, applying for jobs.
The face it to break it, like a muscle - use it or lose it. Shape it or be shaped by it.
My fave analogy is mountain v valley, you climb the mountain to get the view, and to get to the next i.e. better valley.
You can stop for a rest anytime. Take small steps. Stay on an easy path sometimes. But keep climbing.
Hi Julia! Senior Shifter Chris is here!
I love this video! This Sneaky Thing Makes Anxiety Worse
This video really hits home to me. I know deep down; this is what is still causing me to be stuck. However, I have made small progress so that is a start.
I think just by watching this video is the start today I am going to change that. It made me realize that I can accept all my feelings including the uncomfortable ones like anxiety.
I know I have some decisions in my life I need to make, and like you said about our brains liking our same daily routines because it knows it is “safe” and keeping us alive, so I must tell my brain that some uncomfortable feelings is necessary to make a change. I can give my brain evidence of that I have done that before to help overcome anxiety.
Here are my notes:
This Sneaky Thing Makes Anxiety Worse
Thursday, November 9, 2023
8:35 AM
When you try to avoid anxiety, you avoid certain things, or going to places, or try new things or interact with certain people. It tells your brain you cannot handle feeling anxious.
When we only focus on not feeling anxious, we miss out on life.
You can ground yourself, have healthy self-talk and encourage yourself to do something with the anxiety
Courage doesn't happen unless there is something to fear
Tell your brain you're in charge, your anxiety isn't.
The more you do things that typically make you feel anxious, the less anxious they are going to make you feel because you are showing your brain that it is safe. That it is okay, and you can handle and do it.
If you don't act out and meet new people to avoid anxiety, you will miss out on relationships with people because all relationships come with some level of anxiety and difficult feelings.
Face it until you break it.
If you fear change, even good change that you want, that is just the primitive way your brain is trying to keep you alive.
It is the unwillingness to feel anxiety that often keeps us most stuck.
QUESTIONS:
1. How has your unwillingness to feel anxious have been taking away from your life, and the life you want to be living?
Unfortunately, yes, I have been in so many areas avoiding things, although I have made small progress. Progress, not perfection.
2. What kind of life do you even want?
One of acceptance of all my feelings so that I can have a life that I am taking risks, trying new things, meeting new people and exploring new places.
3. What might you be willing to feel along the way to creating that life you want?
All the feelings: anxiety, courage, hopefulness, failure…etc.
4. Are you willing to bring along anxiety with you?
Yes, now that I understand that facing it until I break it is a way to handle life. I can do the things that cause anxiety repeatedly to the point where it no longer feels anxious.
E.G: I developed driving anxiety and over time I started to drive again to the point where it doesn't give me as much anxiety anymore.
I can also remind my brain of that example so that I can use it as proof that I can do hard things, even things that give me anxiety, and that when I do it often, it won't be as anxious anymore.
Anxiety: 👿
There's a video you know....
You are absolutely right Julia. Thanks for a great video!
That's what I was doing, not do inconfortable things to avoid feeling anxious, thank you for this powerful message ❤
Love the way you say 'anxious'.
I am someone who has worried about anxiety all my life. Now, as an adult in my late 40s I am learning to deal with my anxiety and nervousness when in social situations. Thankfully I have professional help to get through this.
So glad to hear it, and good for you.
Hello Julia and group. My name is Cindy, and I struggle with anxiety and worry. It is really affecting
my life.
Having read all of the comments, most everything makes sense in concern to neurological science and basic principles, however i believe that is far different from basic thought and understanding common sense. I will say that being able to read certain feelings and emotions is not always my greatest strength (even with my proficient knowledge), but i will admit that its really up to us as the individual to want to talk about the anxiety and become aware of it - in and of itself - even if it doesn't make sense. I believe anxiety exists to help protect the ego. But that doesn't mean that bliss and inspiration are never around the corner - because there are always amazing vids and podcasts to listen to - and honestly thats really what makes all of us and the things that we do all the more interesting. What is difficult for me to accept however is that when somebody says 'anxiety' can never be conqured. It can. But depending if the specific person or client has a mood disorder or something like PTSD - that is totally understandable. And anxiety disorders of course. What we can all realize is that even if none of us interprets everything the same; we can all choose to educate ourselves and not judge one another based on our heritage, our social interactions, world issues, natural upbringing, and whatever resources are at our disposal.
Just found your channel. Love your videos. Thank you!
Been trying to avoid feeing anxiety by not going out, not wanting to communicate with my parents, not suggesting places to go together. It mainly stems from a fear of my parents judging me about my decision, as they have a habit of being negative. I don't have a driver's license yet so I need them to take me to places not accessible through transit. I want to start letting myself feel anxiety and remind myself I will be okay, and any judgements made by my parents is just their opinion, not a fact.
Thanks ❤ I'm not going to let anxiety win
No you are not! 👏
Anxiety: 👿
I just started watching your Videos, very helpful for me. Thank you,
Kevin F
Hi JKC
Thank you for this upliftment and awareness in understanding one of
the most basic drives in our nature as humans!
Fear feeling is important and MUST be controlled and it is a big task.
Fear is based on expectation, expectations are formed by imagination and
sense of reality.
Being able to navigate these thoughts and instincts is a big task for one's judgment!
You provide a guide that is valuable.....THANK YOU!
You're welcome. Glad you're here and thanks for watching.
❤ I needed this thank you
Thank you! 😊
Anxiety has ruined my life to be successful at my age now and been with me since I was a baby. I will be a tough cookie to fix.
(Singing.) Oh a spoonful of avoidance helps anxiety get worse! Anxiety get worse, anxiety get worse. Oh yes a spoonful of avoidance helps anxiety get worse. In the mostly frightful way!
I love her hair, she has such a cool look. ....in addition to being an awesome doctor.
I am actually less anxious around people I don't know than people I do know. I have tried facing my anxiety and it doesn't work, I still get anxious and I worry about people noticing my anxiety and calling me out on it because they have done that in the past and then I get embarrassed and want to hide.
Julia, I'm so lucky i've found you❤ is showing up to things that scare me and admitting that i'm anxious similar to exposure therapy?
if i feel anxious. i always talk to my inner child. coz I think shes not feel safe or scared being alone again. after talking i feel comfortable and safe. ❤
Yes
For exposure to work the experience must be seen as a success or you just reinforce the anxiety. That why it has not worked for me. I freeze and become mute. This takes 5 minutes to be release from. By then am exhausted.
"Face until you break it"
"anyways"? Really? "Anyways"
Perhaps not.
Anyway, good talk. "Feel the fear and do it anyway."
No its getting exponentially worse and worse and worse
Come to Oz - great southern land
👍
I have only just subscribed - I quite value your content. But as an aside, it's incredible that having a hubby or someone tech-savvy helps you make these videos...Incidentally, - you are desensitising your HPA axis. ACT theory is what is being described here. Not original Of course, anxiety is normal when entering any new situation,- but this is experienced on a continuum. Those at the extreme to those who never experienced it in a very minor way. ACT is associated with moving towards your values..despite your anxiety. However, ACT acceptance is not "white knuckling it" - as also rather contradictory, is what is being expressed here.
😊
🤗🥰
But does that mean you have to continue being in a toxic environment full of hate and gossip and manuplation?
Also I cut people off who are constantly breaking my boundaries even when you tell them over n over that you don't like it, does that mean am running away?
Don't expect an answer from this creator..but no, you are expressing healthy self-assertion.😊