With the loss of his father and finally feeling happy again, he seems he just really attached all of his well being onto Katie. When she doesn’t fully reciprocate yet and actually freezes, he worries that his happiness will be taken away. He doesn’t wanna go back to that dark place, but that’s not Katie’s burden to bare.
Amen! That was what I was thinking and to be honest, that would be kind of a red flag to me, as this kind of responsibility is scary. I wished they had a psychologist on set to step in. I don't know how this plays out, right in the middle now, but I am scared that he could do something to hisself.
@@KaitAC I think so too. Also further down the road, he might weaponize it to control her. "Oh, so just soup for dinner? I feel like you don't really love me anymore, that brings me to such a dark feeling...".
I complete agree, and I wonder too if Katie has her own insecurities (because she's mentioned that she's afraid he's going to leave) that also caused her to freeze up in that moment. It's sad to watch because there's a part of me that thinks, if Greg had done some more healing from the loss of his dad and they had met in real life, they would be perfect for each other!
@@JudgeJeana He weaponized it here too he said I gave you all of my vulnerability, I gave you that I love you, I told my mom you were the one. Now what he's doing is taking all that back because he perceived that he wasn't going to get what you wanted. These type of people only give to get something in return.
To know how the scenes play out and hear Dr. Honda’s on point speculations is so mind blowing. You are SO GOOD at what you do Dr. Honda! We’re so lucky to have you :D
Agreed! Never knew a name for it before. And, would be interested if Dr. Honda could do an episode on the psychology behind why this happens to people, if he hasn't already. Not enough parental bonding, perhaps?
I think the term was coined by Brene Brown, who has written and spoken about vulnerability and shame extensively. You can look up her TED Talk to hear her explain what a vulnerability hangover is and why it happens.
This episode was so exhausting to watch. She tried in every way possible to tell him she wanted him but just not directly. She does one thing that he doesn't like... he loses it. It wasn't fair.
I was on his side up to a point. I agreed that she was being very stiff and understood where he was coming from about inauthenticity, but if he really feels Katie is the one for him, it should take more than this one communication bump to end things. It’s like Greg has never been in a relationship before
@@abandonablesnowmanthat’s what I think is so interesting for people that are like so STRICTLY on his side, like do they not see where he may have been in the wrong? I don’t think anyone has a problem with his feelings. His feelings about the whole situation are completely valid but it’s the way he handled them that had everyone so up in arms. I just find it so odd when people back that behavior so much. (Disclaimer: I’m not saying you are one of those people. I’m just saying that at a certain point you were able to understand both sides and for some reason a lot of people don’t seem to have that point of view) I totally agree that if his love was truly so unconditional (as he made it seem), this bump shouldn’t of sent him into such a downward spiral. Katie and all of us saw it as a bump and he saw it as a brick wall.
@@brenna380 Yes! I appreciate your perspective too. I think a lot of people just see themselves as either person and defend that, but conflict is never completely one person’s fault. I’ve felt like Greg many times and I hope I’ve never torn someone apart the way he did
@@abandonablesnowman Why though? If its clear youre way beyond where someone is and they dont feel the same, why stick around? And it was multiple communication bumps, not just one.
@@brenna380 No one's love in a romantic relationship should be unconditional and its weird to assume that. He made the right choice in leaving imo. I would never accept her reaction from a man after pouring my heart out. And she didnt have to respond that way - she didnt when Blake confessed his "love" for her, did she? That + how she treated him on stage I think are clear indicators that he made the best decision for himself.
“He’s been drinking” Wow I didn’t think about that. Checking in with your physical state is so important. I don’t drink but sometimes I delay meals when I’m busy and then I’ll be more irritable with my husband. It helps a lot when we defer difficult conversations to times when we aren’t hungry, tired, or distracted.
I didn't think about that at all either. I know my worst moments with my SO is when I'm tired, hungry, and under the influence. So much is happening here despite the words....
Good point that seeing Greg's "dark side" is valuable information for Katie. If he handles conflict like this, he was never the right choice, sadly. Too bad she had to find out so late in the game after growing so fond of him.
I am dating someone right now and he moves at such a slow pace. Right now I feel like Greg, I'm losing my sh*t! Watching this really helped me calm down and trust before I did something to self sabotage.
I always appreciate Dr. Kirk's nuance, but here it's especially nice. After I watched this episode, I went on twitter to see what people were saying and hoo boy, were there some wild accusations. I think people watching reality tv sometimes want everything to be a villain/hero dynamic, where someone is evil and the other person does nothing wrong, but that's hardly ever true. Hearing Dr. Kirk apply some nuance, and not blame anyone is very refreshing.
You should watch some of the clips with Michael A. Really good example of a man who's lost his wife and is moving on and trying to do what he needs for himself and take care of a young son.
🙌👍👏👏👏 YES! @Psychology in Seattle, the Katie/Michael A. interactions would provide wonderful opportunities for comment: on grief/moving on, on mature love/communication, on dating with young children/becoming a step-parent.... The Tayshia/Zac vs. Tayshia/Ben relationships from last season (after Clare nearly tanked the show by running off with Dale about 5 minutes in 😂) would also be good for you to react to. There’s a striking difference in experience/maturity, and some outstanding examples of communication with a partner (and with a parent - Tayshia’s dad is amazing.)
I'm a little concerned with how Greg is characterizing Katie. To me, it feels like he's trying to put her into the role of his savior. It's like his happiness is solely dependent on the relationship working out. While a healthy and loving relationship can help you heal from past trauma, you also have to put in the work to be able to stand on your own if the relationship ends. I'm getting the vibe that if Katie does not reciprocate the same energy that he's giving to her, it could lead Greg to spiral into a deeper depression, which could thereby pressure Katie into staying with him because she feels responsible for his happiness. Some disclaimers: this is not me saying you need to love yourself before you can love somebody else, but simply that you cannot put your whole purpose of living on whether another person loves you back. Also, I have not watched the bachelorette so I have no idea what happens in the rest of this episode and I'm just commenting on some of the behaviors that I'm witnessing from Dr. Kirk's last two videos on the show.
I don’t see that at all. I see him taking responsibility for his own feelings by being vulnerable. I also think he should self care by walking away. I needed words from Katie and she didn’t give them to him. She’s human too and she didn’t get that in the moment.
@@grumylynn The fact that Greg is saying he hasn’t been happy for a long time, and that being with Katie is the happiest he has ever been, does indicate that he is making her responsible for his happiness. So I don’t see that as him taking responsibility for his feelings if he’s telling her she is the reason for why he is feeling this way (happy).
Hi Doctor. I just want to acknowledge that you have greatly improved your communication skills in front of the camera I have seen many of your previous videos (which are also very good), and compared to the new ones, I can see more of your personality and more of your great sense of humor. You're doing a great job and thank you so much for your videos.
He just did an interview with Nick Viall, another ex Bachelor who has a podcast. Greg did say he was curled up in a fetal position after this conversation with her. I think he believed she felt the same way toward him, but in that conversation he did not receive the validation he wanted from her. Also seems to point toward his anxious or insecure attachment style.
My husband and I both landed on most of the same conclusions watching this episode. Feels so validating to have a therapist draw the same conclusions! We can't believe people are Team Greg and somehow think he's emotionally mature enough to be the next Bachelor. This show is set up to make you act crazy, but it's clear that he needs time to process and therapy.
And Greg’s reaction was sadly a little familiar to me 😳 I have been working on my attachment style and communication but I have been there like him when you are terrified and retreat… in that moment when you’re upset, there’s the assumption that no one will show up for you, so you just want to run and your nervous system is a wreck. Retreat feels like the only way to be safe.
Greg is very aware of how the show works. He applied for two other seasons before getting cast on Katie’s season so he’s aware of the dynamic and how the lead has to be especially in the end stages. In a way I feel like through his emotions he was trying to cheat the system and highjack her season
Yeah, it’s hard to know his motives. He’s a trained actor, so there’s that, but was he trying to be the bachelor this whole time? He’s had a good edit this far, but it’s almost like his emotionality got in the way at some point and he sabotaged that goal, if that was a goal
There's no respect for her role as the Bachelorette, which to me is misogynistic. This is like her job and responsibility right now and he doesn't respect her desire to fulfill her role to the end. It's all about him and he better get emotionally reassured when and how he wants it.
@@ggsnaps I hadn’t thought of that, but that’s so true. It has a vibe of “quit your dream job and move to this state with me because I couldn’t possibly quit mine”
truly, especially hilarious since this is his third time applying (consecutively btw) and he finally made it on. You'd think he'd be well-versed in this show he's been fixated with getting on for 3 years, or at least familiar with its format but that's just my guess!
I’d LOVE to see you also compare katie and Greg’s relationship and this argument compared to her and Blake. I feel like what they have is so healthy and mature and is really set up for success
If this is only the second bachelor related show you’ve watched you’ve already totally caught on to the dynamics of the show! The seasons are getting increasingly raw and emotional and there seems to be no boundaries for what moments are caught on camera. I think that trend started in Arie’s season and escalated from there.
He is pushing his pain onto someone that he is not exclusively dating, even if she is implying that she wants to be exclusive with him. My current partner had just ended a long term relationship when we started to see each other, so she was not interested in another committed relationship early on. I caught the "feels" early and had to experience the pain of her going to see another man for a weekend getaway. It really sucked. However, I also realized that I had started to use my own emotional turmoil to guilt trip her and that made my personal pain even worse. I had to take a deep personal breath to realize what I was doing, that I was doing it because of my own insecurities, and she did not deserve that. I guess it worked in the long run, but even if it hadn't, I feel like I grew so much from that realization.
Wow, that's tough but good for you! That's some great emotional awareness and regulation. Maybe you should give Greg a call, he could learn a thing or two lol
Never clicked so fast on a video in my life. I loved this season of the Bachelorette, and I got addicted to your Love is Blind series. It honestly changed my relationship for the better bc I started implementing the changes you suggested for some of the couples.
Definitely looking forward to the #3 reaction video when he goes to visit her when things take a turn. Your objective perspective is very refreshing. There are so many people weighing in on this situation.... so many different interpretations of what is happening.
Oh greg. My dude. Ive been where greg is and ended up fully pushing away the first person i felt i could be 100% authentically me with. Theres a lot of fear and feels like the stakes are high. You feel right on the edge of this either being the start of the greatest years of your life or the fall to a completely new low you've never experienced before (black & white). And you havent been given a reason not to trust them or they've explained why theyre not saying the things you want/need them to say, but your body & soul feel so in-like them, so high on knowing them, so lucky to have even crossed paths with them, so special to have your feelings up to that point reciprocated & cared for in a way no one has before by them...that it feels too risky to just trust them (live in the grey area) to meet you there when you really need them to. Argh. I feel for greg. I could not picture going through all of that on television. Edit: feel like i have to state ive never seen the show..
So not fair to Katie. I agree with other commenters here about the red flag. Greg is acting like she owes him something because he gave her his "vulnerability", when no commitment has been made yet towards exclusivity. And, I have a hard time believing that he hasn't been like this to any other woman prior to her. I can imagine he has found that "crying" has worked on the women he has pursued in the past, and maybe even uses it as a subconscious tactic. I don't follow the bachelor, so I don't know if the season is already over, and she is with him or not, but, if not, I hope Katie is not too deep in her feelings to fall for it.
I believe his emotions and vulnerability are genuine, he’s hurt by the past and the loss of his father. However, I’m getting the sense he’s pushing those emotions onto Katie which comes across as emotional manipulation. He wants to win her over by making her feel responsible for his mental and emotional stability. This is pure guilt and sympathy baiting. I’m starting to think that maybe going on the show wasn’t right for him, at least not at this moment of his life. Perhaps he should seek some healing first. It hurts me to say, but I hope she doesn’t choose him because I get the sense it’ll be a very toxic relationship. I think she will pick him though.
Does Katie have to say she loves him, though, right then and there? In the clips I have seen, it's almost as though Greg felt "owed" a reciprocation of feelings. maybe she does love him but doesn't feel ready to say it? I know it wasn't a reality tv show lol, but when my partner said "i love you", i don't think i reciprocated for a couple more months. But here we are nearly 15 years later... idk I just find it odd how he let himself be vulnerable but behaved as though he was deserving of a prize for that. You do things because you want to, not for what you'll get.🤷♀️ edit: I just mean there is always a chance when you tell someone how you're feeling you won't get what you want right away... (I had to edit again to be clear I am not saying Greg is a bad person. I recently lost a parent and can only imagine the pain he is experiencing. He is a real person and I couldn't imagine the intense pressure if baring emotions on a TV program.. I am sure that added to the "vulnerability hangover". I hope he is doing ok!)
@@amvguerrero Well, I mean, yeah, but doesn't every one sort of expect it back. I expect it back from my kids, as well as my husband. I can't really imagine a scenario where they wouldn't say it back. Now in Greg's case, yeah, he could be feeling things more strongly than her, and that should be okay, but at the same time, I think she has said a lot that makes him think she is in love and for whatever reason, this was the night he thought he would be getting that back.
@@sabrinashelton1997 @Malo periculosam libertatem quam quietam servitutem I would hope a person would be able to trust their spouse will reciprocate love, like they committed to do. I think we should separate the two "givings"...one is physical (gifts/time), the other emotional (love). My original comment was in regards to the physical, but extends into emotional too, Love and the giving of it deserves to be a whole essay though! Yes, it is possible to GIVE to somebody WITH expectations, but that isn't coming from a right HEART/place of giving. Love just IS , love is a giver without taking, a good example is a Mama's love for her teenagers! You don't love somebody because you EXPECT them to love you in return, all you can do is love them, and HOPE they love you in return, or choose not to give your love to that person...therefore not giving at all...which is sometimes the right choice (except when it comes to your children!)
I’m beyond excited for this lol I could always see some weird intensity in Greg, so I wasn’t that surprised when he lost his mind, though I do think what he was feeling was valid and Katie’s response to him didn’t quite match his level
He needed validation all throughout the season and she kept giving it to him. This was the one time when she failed to do so in the way that he needed or expected. I don’t think this show was a good choice for him given where he is in his journey of healing.
This kind of videos make watching reality shows really worthwhile. I usually do the analysis with my wife, but this adds a lot of value. Thank you, so much.
Thank you for this! I'm one of the few people who think Katie didn't do anything wrong. She was true to her feelings and the process of the show (I think she still had some reservations about him but was falling in love). I don't understand why people are saying it's 100% her fault. They are thrashing the poor girl on social media. It's sad. It's like you can't convince these people of reality. They want to hate her.
100% with you. Especially after she was on the floor and basically begged him not to go. I was shocked so many ppl were coming for her. Even for bachelor nation this was next level!! I think a lot of them hated her b4 this and just used this as an excuse.
I've been in a relationship where for a while, he was "a few steps ahead" in how intensely he was feeling. I also loved him, but not exactly the same at that moment. Seeing this and your analysis really brought back that difficult feeling of wanting to reciprocate, love and reassure someone but also staying authentic about my own feelings. We also hit a similar difficult spot where he demanded I be equally emotional, equally frequently as him, which was tough, but we did eventually land on the same page in the end (:
I believe that this guy is grieving the loss of his father, etc., but my radar started pinging early on his approach to this. She could have been more explicit about having strong feelings while having to hold off on her official choice. but he also could have just said he has strong feelings and asked about hers, without raising the stakes to the point that if she let him down then his whole world would fall apart. Even if she were to choose him now and stop the show, she could never hold up his world for him. It felt like he was leveraging his grief to persuade her to appease his desire because he didn't have confidence she'd choose him.
Yes, this footage was filmed during "hometown week" and the following week is "fantasy suite week" where they get a chance for an overnight date with 3 of the contestants...
I had a similar thought. The show relies on having a season play out fully with a lot of tension of surprise to hook audiences to keep watching. The Bachelorette's contract may not allow her to "nuke" the show without breaching her contract. For someone to be a Bachelorette must also enjoy the spotlight to be on the show and part of that would be having a positive relationship with the studio. Nuking the show then ends her chances of perhaps being invited by the studio to participate in other programs. It would be interesting to know what exactly the contract and behind the scenes expectations are.
Also him acting like she's crazy or misreading him being upset by responding with "what am I doing?" and "how am I acting?" when she said she hates seeing him upset like that and stuff is, and I don't care what people want to say about it, gaslighting. HE WAS upset. He was acting upset. So for him to make her feel like the crazy one who was misreading the situation is gaslighting.
I disagree, I didn't see that as gaslighting. I interpreted that he was trying to get her to say why he was upset. But it seemed to go over her head and she didn't realize why her reaction upset him.
I feel bad that this was the way it seems like their relationship is ending. Greg should have been a bit more patient and understanding of Katie's position on this show and she tried to reassure him as much as possible without saying too much. He should know that this is how the show works, you have to wait until the last week to find out who she picks. I really thought they would end up together!
Bachelors and bachelorettes in the past have told contestants “it’s you and me at the end” but it usually ends in hurt feelings so I think Katie wanted to avoid this by not telling anyone how she’s really feeling
I can understand Greg's pain, but also I can't avoid to see him coming across as a manipulator, maybe not in a conscious way but I felt he knew she was having strong feelings for someone else at the same time and by using his pain he was trying to get her to commit to him before the proposal
Really appreciate your feedback on this. I have found viewers are on one side or the other; I appreciate a professional look at both sides and what they are doing well vs poorly. With that being said.......I have a feeling you're not going to be very supportive of Greg soon haha. He does have viewpoints that leads to his frustration, but how he handles it is damaging. It's like what you mentioned this video; there aren't as many of Katie's decisions that you can critique, but you have a few views of Greg that you think could be better.
Fantastic analysis! It was difficult to watch Greg put his heart on the line, open up to her and leave feeling rejected. I'm guessing Katie is under a great deal of pressure to fulfill contractual obligations and not do as her predecessor did in the previous season. As I watched, it brought to mind "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. If there's any credence to his theory, I'm guessing Greg's isn't "words of affirmation" and may, in part, be why he's not understanding what Katie is trying to say to him and having great difficulty reading between the lines? I'm guessing his may be physical touch and more of that may have helped him better understand her feelings? It was interesting when she said: "What do you need to know?" It seemed clear what he wanted to know and I wonder if that statement may have contributed to possible feelings of not being seen, heard or understood by her. I was hoping she'd say to him something to the effect of "I'm not going anywhere" because he seemed to be "the one" in her eyes. It may have given him just enough hope to hold on until the end-hard to say. It may be a statement that would fly under the studio's radar as well because it's open to interpretation. I'm curious how this ends and look forward to your next analysis!
I don't watch this show so I don't know what happens next but I've loved these reaction videos. Very interesting insights and a nice change of pace from the 90DF couples. Can't wait for the next one
You are SO GOOD at what you do!! Just the way you explain things in this video and others has helped me even understand more about my own relationship and life! I don’t think you’ll read this but I just wanted to say thank you!!! Your insight and videos have been so educational.
If I was this guys big brother, I’d tell him to that she doesn’t owe him anything. I’d say what can you control in this situation? And then I’d remind him that she will make a decision and it’s up to him to stick around if he believes it’s worth it. He needs to have the confidence to deal with his emotions and not make it about how she’s reacting.
As soon as I see a man stare with half shut eyes I know they are tremendously angry. You get to know the warning signs from experience. My guess is he has some for of emotional neglect growing up. Possibly from his mum. I hope he gets therapy because it would help him.❤
She kissed his hand and wiped his tears …”I love looking at you” what if she was going to telling him “I love you” then have to say something different and he didn’t catch it?
She was terrified if she didn't say anything it would make it worse, and terrified if she did say something it would be the wrong thing. I know the feeling.
“Good job, Katie-I think she saved it.” Uggh, how I wish you had been right about that, Dr. Kirk. More than a year later, and I still lament what could have been between these two. They seemed so “in love” to me!
i think that Greg needed to know, good or bad, where he stood with her. at this point, he's clearly fully invested and he knows if he goes any further and winds up getting burned in the end, it will devastate him. i also think that because he had no control of what happened with his father, being in control of this situation is something that he clung to. to control if he stays or if he goes, and prevents the heartbreak. at the very least, i think it would have been him and Blake at the end, and i think he knew that too.
I feel like you should work for Bachelor nation as a therapist, I heard that reality shows need to provide therapy to contestants since it is hard mentally some people can’t handle all the things that come with being on reality TV, and I think you’d be really helpful for them!
Unfortunately they want and encourage the contestants to basically go crazy because it’s better for drama. I bet they told Greg to go on the balcony and catch a look at Blake and Katie on their date to stir up his emotions. It would be great if they had a therapist though
One interesting thing to know that might change your perspective on the entire situation that I thought when you suggested he watch hulu - from what I understand they aren't allowed contact with the outside world for the duration of the show. They don't have access to phones or computers or anything like that (except in special cases, like a father who was allowed to facetime his son daily). I've never seen them watching television on the show and I'm not even sure they have a television in the house. From what I understand this helps to speed up the process of "falling in love" for the contestants because really, all they have to do all day is work out/swim, talk to other contestants, and think about their relationships.
I’d always thought that knowing when to take a step back as feelings start to become overwhelming was a normal intuitive action - especially in a romantic relationship. But I guess it’s something you mature into.
@@Cathee45 I don't believe that Blake is as emotionally invested in Katie as Greg appears to be. Plus Blake has shown a questionable pattern of relationships where he is strongly attached from the get go before any significant emotional connection being formed. I wouldn't consider Blake to be a secured attached person. But, it's just speculation on my part. 😏
@@Cathee45 Personally I can’t stand Blake lol he comes off to me like he really understands the show’s format and is trying to play a character to be cast multiple times in the show
@@Cathee45 I like Blake. People poke fun at him because this is his 3rd bachelorette but I don’t think Clare should count. And he’s not the first to come in mid season. On Matt’s season I was actually thinking that a Katie and him would make a good match.
@@barbararosa9116 I see where you're coming from. He was not one of my favourites but I did like how supportive and caring he was when Katie shared her past traumatic experience (the SA).
I feel like Greg is coming on a bit too intense and too "Emo" for want of a better descriptor. You are on a show. The show needs to play out. Take it down a notch and relax. Plus, for me, there is something very off-putting about how he is behaving here. I like the vulnerability but not the desperation. They haven't known each other that long, he signed up for this gig so I feel it is a bit emotionally manipulative to be making it so dramatic. But I'm sure the producers love it - great for ratings! Not so great for a healthy relationship though.
Totally agree. This whole thing gives her a red flag. Not really self-sabotage but more showing who he really is. Still a sweet man but only for the right woman
Agreed! I commented similar elsewhere...the red flag for me is that even if this wasn't the bachelorette and they were dating in the "regular world"...once he said all that, she still may not have even reciprocated! Idk it is offputting and I appreciated Dr. Honda's perspective on how fragile Greg is and how he likely needs therapy.
His dad died too. My dad died a few years ago. He probably feels betrayed by his dad subconsciously for leaving him. I’ve felt that way and pushed it onto others. So that’s my best guess.
I’m so sorry for your loss. This was where my thoughts went during the betrayal discussion as well. With all of the talk about his dad and his inability to talk about it, it seems this is a viable source of that betrayal feeling, even if he does not recognize it.
Dr. Honda, it might provide some helpful nuance into these reality shows if you watched The Hills reaction videos from Whitney Port on UA-cam. She was on reality TV and her husband is a reality TV producer and they discuss a lot of behind the scenes stuff about reality shows. For example, these shows strategically edit in facial expressions and audio clips at times when they didn’t really happen in order to tell a more captivating story. They also discuss how reality shows often blur the lines between acting and reality, since stars are prompted to hit “story beats” throughout filming, even though the discussions are their own.
I honestly think that the "I just like looking at you" was edited in, especially since he never repeated it at the AFR. Someone also mentioned that Greg is friends w a producer on the show.
Greg resembles Anakin Skywalker here when his fear of losing her takes him to the dark side, which inevitably causes him to lose her. Greg should have just trusted the power of the force of love.
It's amazing how you are so on point with Greg! The thing is that she CAN show him more emotion and tell him how she feels without saying "love." She has in the past with him. This is the first time she held back and he noticed it. She was more vulnerable with him in their previous dates, but as soon as he gets vulnerable she doesn't. That's why he's losing it. He didn't expect that. In Katie's defense, I think she blanked out on him or was at loss for words.
Also recommend watching/reacting to the movie Short Term 12. Amazing portrayal of kids in a group home as well as the emotions of social workers who work with them.
I feel that Greg is trying to audition for a soap opera. 🤔 Desperately wanting to be cast into a role, and eventually fandom. I know feelings are not facts, it’s just the vibe I’m getting.
I don't really feel that vibe but who knows? You may be right. I think that many contestants come on this show for publicity. I certainly got that vibe from Brendan on Tayshia's season.
With the loss of his father and finally feeling happy again, he seems he just really attached all of his well being onto Katie. When she doesn’t fully reciprocate yet and actually freezes, he worries that his happiness will be taken away. He doesn’t wanna go back to that dark place, but that’s not Katie’s burden to bare.
Amen! That was what I was thinking and to be honest, that would be kind of a red flag to me, as this kind of responsibility is scary.
I wished they had a psychologist on set to step in. I don't know how this plays out, right in the middle now, but I am scared that he could do something to hisself.
And even if Katie chose him, in time he would still go back to that dark place when the "novelty" wears off.
@@KaitAC I think so too. Also further down the road, he might weaponize it to control her. "Oh, so just soup for dinner? I feel like you don't really love me anymore, that brings me to such a dark feeling...".
I complete agree, and I wonder too if Katie has her own insecurities (because she's mentioned that she's afraid he's going to leave) that also caused her to freeze up in that moment. It's sad to watch because there's a part of me that thinks, if Greg had done some more healing from the loss of his dad and they had met in real life, they would be perfect for each other!
@@JudgeJeana He weaponized it here too he said I gave you all of my vulnerability, I gave you that I love you, I told my mom you were the one. Now what he's doing is taking all that back because he perceived that he wasn't going to get what you wanted. These type of people only give to get something in return.
To know how the scenes play out and hear Dr. Honda’s on point speculations is so mind blowing. You are SO GOOD at what you do Dr. Honda! We’re so lucky to have you :D
🙌 That was exactly my reaction too 😂
Perfectly said!!
My thoughts exactly!
I wish he was my therapist 😔
I’m so happy someone sees what I see, some of the women commenting on Twitter are ludicrous, like the gaslighting BS.
It's pretty interesting to hear you speak of a "vulnerability hangover." I've never heard it put that way before, but that's exactly how it feels.
Agreed! Never knew a name for it before. And, would be interested if Dr. Honda could do an episode on the psychology behind why this happens to people, if he hasn't already. Not enough parental bonding, perhaps?
I think the term was coined by Brene Brown, who has written and spoken about vulnerability and shame extensively. You can look up her TED Talk to hear her explain what a vulnerability hangover is and why it happens.
Brene Brown coined that phrase
This episode was so exhausting to watch. She tried in every way possible to tell him she wanted him but just not directly. She does one thing that he doesn't like... he loses it. It wasn't fair.
I was on his side up to a point. I agreed that she was being very stiff and understood where he was coming from about inauthenticity, but if he really feels Katie is the one for him, it should take more than this one communication bump to end things. It’s like Greg has never been in a relationship before
@@abandonablesnowmanthat’s what I think is so interesting for people that are like so STRICTLY on his side, like do they not see where he may have been in the wrong? I don’t think anyone has a problem with his feelings. His feelings about the whole situation are completely valid but it’s the way he handled them that had everyone so up in arms. I just find it so odd when people back that behavior so much.
(Disclaimer: I’m not saying you are one of those people. I’m just saying that at a certain point you were able to understand both sides and for some reason a lot of people don’t seem to have that point of view)
I totally agree that if his love was truly so unconditional (as he made it seem), this bump shouldn’t of sent him into such a downward spiral. Katie and all of us saw it as a bump and he saw it as a brick wall.
@@brenna380 Yes! I appreciate your perspective too. I think a lot of people just see themselves as either person and defend that, but conflict is never completely one person’s fault. I’ve felt like Greg many times and I hope I’ve never torn someone apart the way he did
@@abandonablesnowman Why though? If its clear youre way beyond where someone is and they dont feel the same, why stick around? And it was multiple communication bumps, not just one.
@@brenna380 No one's love in a romantic relationship should be unconditional and its weird to assume that. He made the right choice in leaving imo. I would never accept her reaction from a man after pouring my heart out. And she didnt have to respond that way - she didnt when Blake confessed his "love" for her, did she? That + how she treated him on stage I think are clear indicators that he made the best decision for himself.
“He’s been drinking”
Wow I didn’t think about that. Checking in with your physical state is so important. I don’t drink but sometimes I delay meals when I’m busy and then I’ll be more irritable with my husband. It helps a lot when we defer difficult conversations to times when we aren’t hungry, tired, or distracted.
I didn't think about that at all either. I know my worst moments with my SO is when I'm tired, hungry, and under the influence. So much is happening here despite the words....
"just go to bed." Mind blown. I need this kind of guidance.
Good point that seeing Greg's "dark side" is valuable information for Katie. If he handles conflict like this, he was never the right choice, sadly. Too bad she had to find out so late in the game after growing so fond of him.
“Dude, go to bed!” 😂
I am dating someone right now and he moves at such a slow pace. Right now I feel like Greg, I'm losing my sh*t! Watching this really helped me calm down and trust before I did something to self sabotage.
I always appreciate Dr. Kirk's nuance, but here it's especially nice. After I watched this episode, I went on twitter to see what people were saying and hoo boy, were there some wild accusations. I think people watching reality tv sometimes want everything to be a villain/hero dynamic, where someone is evil and the other person does nothing wrong, but that's hardly ever true. Hearing Dr. Kirk apply some nuance, and not blame anyone is very refreshing.
You should watch some of the clips with Michael A. Really good example of a man who's lost his wife and is moving on and trying to do what he needs for himself and take care of a young son.
🙌👍👏👏👏 YES! @Psychology in Seattle, the Katie/Michael A. interactions would provide wonderful opportunities for comment: on grief/moving on, on mature love/communication, on dating with young children/becoming a step-parent....
The Tayshia/Zac vs. Tayshia/Ben relationships from last season (after Clare nearly tanked the show by running off with Dale about 5 minutes in 😂) would also be good for you to react to. There’s a striking difference in experience/maturity, and some outstanding examples of communication with a partner (and with a parent - Tayshia’s dad is amazing.)
Michael A was too precious for the bachelorette 🥺
I'm a little concerned with how Greg is characterizing Katie. To me, it feels like he's trying to put her into the role of his savior. It's like his happiness is solely dependent on the relationship working out. While a healthy and loving relationship can help you heal from past trauma, you also have to put in the work to be able to stand on your own if the relationship ends. I'm getting the vibe that if Katie does not reciprocate the same energy that he's giving to her, it could lead Greg to spiral into a deeper depression, which could thereby pressure Katie into staying with him because she feels responsible for his happiness.
Some disclaimers: this is not me saying you need to love yourself before you can love somebody else, but simply that you cannot put your whole purpose of living on whether another person loves you back. Also, I have not watched the bachelorette so I have no idea what happens in the rest of this episode and I'm just commenting on some of the behaviors that I'm witnessing from Dr. Kirk's last two videos on the show.
I do watch the Bachelorette, and I think your comments are spot on 🙌💐
10000%
💯
I don’t see that at all. I see him taking responsibility for his own feelings by being vulnerable. I also think he should self care by walking away. I needed words from Katie and she didn’t give them to him. She’s human too and she didn’t get that in the moment.
@@grumylynn The fact that Greg is saying he hasn’t been happy for a long time, and that being with Katie is the happiest he has ever been, does indicate that he is making her responsible for his happiness. So I don’t see that as him taking responsibility for his feelings if he’s telling her she is the reason for why he is feeling this way (happy).
Finally someone who understands her reaction it's clear she wanted to say it back but she couldn't
Hi Doctor.
I just want to acknowledge that you have greatly improved your communication skills in front of the camera
I have seen many of your previous videos (which are also very good), and compared to the new ones, I can see more of your personality and more of your great sense of humor.
You're doing a great job and thank you so much for your videos.
He just did an interview with Nick Viall, another ex Bachelor who has a podcast. Greg did say he was curled up in a fetal position after this conversation with her. I think he believed she felt the same way toward him, but in that conversation he did not receive the validation he wanted from her. Also seems to point toward his anxious or insecure attachment style.
THANK YOU for reacting to this! I've seen some pretty polarizing perspectives of this argument so I really wanted a more objective opinion on this.
My husband and I both landed on most of the same conclusions watching this episode. Feels so validating to have a therapist draw the same conclusions! We can't believe people are Team Greg and somehow think he's emotionally mature enough to be the next Bachelor. This show is set up to make you act crazy, but it's clear that he needs time to process and therapy.
And Greg’s reaction was sadly a little familiar to me 😳 I have been working on my attachment style and communication but I have been there like him when you are terrified and retreat… in that moment when you’re upset, there’s the assumption that no one will show up for you, so you just want to run and your nervous system is a wreck. Retreat feels like the only way to be safe.
Yup
thank you for your comment gives some context
Greg is very aware of how the show works. He applied for two other seasons before getting cast on Katie’s season so he’s aware of the dynamic and how the lead has to be especially in the end stages. In a way I feel like through his emotions he was trying to cheat the system and highjack her season
exactly! i said that he was trying to get her to "pull a clare"
Yeah, it’s hard to know his motives. He’s a trained actor, so there’s that, but was he trying to be the bachelor this whole time? He’s had a good edit this far, but it’s almost like his emotionality got in the way at some point and he sabotaged that goal, if that was a goal
There's no respect for her role as the Bachelorette, which to me is misogynistic. This is like her job and responsibility right now and he doesn't respect her desire to fulfill her role to the end. It's all about him and he better get emotionally reassured when and how he wants it.
@@ggsnaps I hadn’t thought of that, but that’s so true. It has a vibe of “quit your dream job and move to this state with me because I couldn’t possibly quit mine”
"I think she saved it."
Ahaha...
Dr. Honda’s face when she said “I love looking at you” made me audibility laugh. That was America’s reaction as well 😂
Greg is shocked to find out that apparently he's been on the bachelorette this whole time
LOOL
😂😂 I’m saying!
truly, especially hilarious since this is his third time applying (consecutively btw) and he finally made it on. You'd think he'd be well-versed in this show he's been fixated with getting on for 3 years, or at least familiar with its format but that's just my guess!
this genuinely made me laugh 😂
😁 😁 😁 😁
“Go watch Hulu, they got Rick & Morty” 😂😂
I’d LOVE to see you also compare katie and Greg’s relationship and this argument compared to her and Blake. I feel like what they have is so healthy and mature and is really set up for success
If this is only the second bachelor related show you’ve watched you’ve already totally caught on to the dynamics of the show! The seasons are getting increasingly raw and emotional and there seems to be no boundaries for what moments are caught on camera. I think that trend started in Arie’s season and escalated from there.
He is pushing his pain onto someone that he is not exclusively dating, even if she is implying that she wants to be exclusive with him. My current partner had just ended a long term relationship when we started to see each other, so she was not interested in another committed relationship early on. I caught the "feels" early and had to experience the pain of her going to see another man for a weekend getaway. It really sucked. However, I also realized that I had started to use my own emotional turmoil to guilt trip her and that made my personal pain even worse. I had to take a deep personal breath to realize what I was doing, that I was doing it because of my own insecurities, and she did not deserve that. I guess it worked in the long run, but even if it hadn't, I feel like I grew so much from that realization.
🙌 Good for you! Way to be differentiated!💐
That would be really difficult to do! Good for you on the self-reflection!
So hard to come to your realizations but so amazing that you did! :)
Wow, that's tough but good for you! That's some great emotional awareness and regulation. Maybe you should give Greg a call, he could learn a thing or two lol
Well done, you! 🏆
Never clicked so fast on a video in my life. I loved this season of the Bachelorette, and I got addicted to your Love is Blind series. It honestly changed my relationship for the better bc I started implementing the changes you suggested for some of the couples.
Definitely looking forward to the #3 reaction video when he goes to visit her when things take a turn. Your objective perspective is very refreshing. There are so many people weighing in on this situation.... so many different interpretations of what is happening.
Oh greg. My dude. Ive been where greg is and ended up fully pushing away the first person i felt i could be 100% authentically me with. Theres a lot of fear and feels like the stakes are high. You feel right on the edge of this either being the start of the greatest years of your life or the fall to a completely new low you've never experienced before (black & white). And you havent been given a reason not to trust them or they've explained why theyre not saying the things you want/need them to say, but your body & soul feel so in-like them, so high on knowing them, so lucky to have even crossed paths with them, so special to have your feelings up to that point reciprocated & cared for in a way no one has before by them...that it feels too risky to just trust them (live in the grey area) to meet you there when you really need them to. Argh. I feel for greg. I could not picture going through all of that on television.
Edit: feel like i have to state ive never seen the show..
So not fair to Katie. I agree with other commenters here about the red flag. Greg is acting like she owes him something because he gave her his "vulnerability", when no commitment has been made yet towards exclusivity. And, I have a hard time believing that he hasn't been like this to any other woman prior to her. I can imagine he has found that "crying" has worked on the women he has pursued in the past, and maybe even uses it as a subconscious tactic. I don't follow the bachelor, so I don't know if the season is already over, and she is with him or not, but, if not, I hope Katie is not too deep in her feelings to fall for it.
Oh bad mood-itis!!! My new favorite technical term!!!
I believe his emotions and vulnerability are genuine, he’s hurt by the past and the loss of his father. However, I’m getting the sense he’s pushing those emotions onto Katie which comes across as emotional manipulation. He wants to win her over by making her feel responsible for his mental and emotional stability. This is pure guilt and sympathy baiting. I’m starting to think that maybe going on the show wasn’t right for him, at least not at this moment of his life. Perhaps he should seek some healing first. It hurts me to say, but I hope she doesn’t choose him because I get the sense it’ll be a very toxic relationship. I think she will pick him though.
Thought the same thing!
Does Katie have to say she loves him, though, right then and there? In the clips I have seen, it's almost as though Greg felt "owed" a reciprocation of feelings. maybe she does love him but doesn't feel ready to say it?
I know it wasn't a reality tv show lol, but when my partner said "i love you", i don't think i reciprocated for a couple more months. But here we are nearly 15 years later... idk I just find it odd how he let himself be vulnerable but behaved as though he was deserving of a prize for that. You do things because you want to, not for what you'll get.🤷♀️ edit: I just mean there is always a chance when you tell someone how you're feeling you won't get what you want right away...
(I had to edit again to be clear I am not saying Greg is a bad person. I recently lost a parent and can only imagine the pain he is experiencing. He is a real person and I couldn't imagine the intense pressure if baring emotions on a TV program.. I am sure that added to the "vulnerability hangover". I hope he is doing ok!)
Yes! I always am telling my husband, it's not giving from the right place if you are giving it because you expect something in return.
@@amvguerrero Well, I mean, yeah, but doesn't every one sort of expect it back. I expect it back from my kids, as well as my husband. I can't really imagine a scenario where they wouldn't say it back. Now in Greg's case, yeah, he could be feeling things more strongly than her, and that should be okay, but at the same time, I think she has said a lot that makes him think she is in love and for whatever reason, this was the night he thought he would be getting that back.
Agreed!
It's ok and I get you and I agree.
@@sabrinashelton1997 @Malo periculosam libertatem quam quietam servitutem I would hope a person would be able to trust their spouse will reciprocate love, like they committed to do.
I think we should separate the two "givings"...one is physical (gifts/time), the other emotional (love). My original comment was in regards to the physical, but extends into emotional too, Love and the giving of it deserves to be a whole essay though!
Yes, it is possible to GIVE to somebody WITH expectations, but that isn't coming from a right HEART/place of giving.
Love just IS , love is a giver without taking, a good example is a Mama's love for her teenagers! You don't love somebody because you EXPECT them to love you in return, all you can do is love them, and HOPE they love you in return, or choose not to give your love to that person...therefore not giving at all...which is sometimes the right choice (except when it comes to your children!)
I’m beyond excited for this lol I could always see some weird intensity in Greg, so I wasn’t that surprised when he lost his mind, though I do think what he was feeling was valid and Katie’s response to him didn’t quite match his level
Finally a healthy perspective on this situation.
He needed validation all throughout the season and she kept giving it to him. This was the one time when she failed to do so in the way that he needed or expected. I don’t think this show was a good choice for him given where he is in his journey of healing.
Would love to see a video on black & white thinking in relationships! 🙂
This kind of videos make watching reality shows really worthwhile. I usually do the analysis with my wife, but this adds a lot of value. Thank you, so much.
Thank you for this! I'm one of the few people who think Katie didn't do anything wrong. She was true to her feelings and the process of the show (I think she still had some reservations about him but was falling in love). I don't understand why people are saying it's 100% her fault. They are thrashing the poor girl on social media. It's sad. It's like you can't convince these people of reality. They want to hate her.
100% with you. Especially after she was on the floor and basically begged him not to go. I was shocked so many ppl were coming for her. Even for bachelor nation this was next level!! I think a lot of them hated her b4 this and just used this as an excuse.
I've been in a relationship where for a while, he was "a few steps ahead" in how intensely he was feeling. I also loved him, but not exactly the same at that moment. Seeing this and your analysis really brought back that difficult feeling of wanting to reciprocate, love and reassure someone but also staying authentic about my own feelings. We also hit a similar difficult spot where he demanded I be equally emotional, equally frequently as him, which was tough, but we did eventually land on the same page in the end (:
Ahh good, I suppose patience is so important in love
I believe that this guy is grieving the loss of his father, etc., but my radar started pinging early on his approach to this. She could have been more explicit about having strong feelings while having to hold off on her official choice. but he also could have just said he has strong feelings and asked about hers, without raising the stakes to the point that if she let him down then his whole world would fall apart. Even if she were to choose him now and stop the show, she could never hold up his world for him. It felt like he was leveraging his grief to persuade her to appease his desire because he didn't have confidence she'd choose him.
this was so beautifully put
Yes, this footage was filmed during "hometown week" and the following week is "fantasy suite week" where they get a chance for an overnight date with 3 of the contestants...
I had a similar thought. The show relies on having a season play out fully with a lot of tension of surprise to hook audiences to keep watching. The Bachelorette's contract may not allow her to "nuke" the show without breaching her contract. For someone to be a Bachelorette must also enjoy the spotlight to be on the show and part of that would be having a positive relationship with the studio. Nuking the show then ends her chances of perhaps being invited by the studio to participate in other programs. It would be interesting to know what exactly the contract and behind the scenes expectations are.
leaving it on a cliffhanger!!! Can't wait for you to react to the next day...
Also him acting like she's crazy or misreading him being upset by responding with "what am I doing?" and "how am I acting?" when she said she hates seeing him upset like that and stuff is, and I don't care what people want to say about it, gaslighting. HE WAS upset. He was acting upset. So for him to make her feel like the crazy one who was misreading the situation is gaslighting.
I disagree, I didn't see that as gaslighting. I interpreted that he was trying to get her to say why he was upset. But it seemed to go over her head and she didn't realize why her reaction upset him.
@@ilanam3398 You're giving a MAN too much credit.
I feel bad that this was the way it seems like their relationship is ending. Greg should have been a bit more patient and understanding of Katie's position on this show and she tried to reassure him as much as possible without saying too much. He should know that this is how the show works, you have to wait until the last week to find out who she picks. I really thought they would end up together!
I'm so glad you are doing this!
Bachelors and bachelorettes in the past have told contestants “it’s you and me at the end” but it usually ends in hurt feelings so I think Katie wanted to avoid this by not telling anyone how she’s really feeling
Yes or said they liked or loved multiple ppl. I think she was trying desperately not to do that and contractually couldn't outright say it.
yes. thank you! this is the only breakdown of this that matters tbh
Omg I was still so nervous to watch it a second time with you 😫
I can understand Greg's pain, but also I can't avoid to see him coming across as a manipulator, maybe not in a conscious way but I felt he knew she was having strong feelings for someone else at the same time and by using his pain he was trying to get her to commit to him before the proposal
Really appreciate your feedback on this. I have found viewers are on one side or the other; I appreciate a professional look at both sides and what they are doing well vs poorly.
With that being said.......I have a feeling you're not going to be very supportive of Greg soon haha. He does have viewpoints that leads to his frustration, but how he handles it is damaging. It's like what you mentioned this video; there aren't as many of Katie's decisions that you can critique, but you have a few views of Greg that you think could be better.
Does Greg even know he's on a game show?
🤣!!
Ya he found out that he was just a contestant on the Katie show. Then he left and dodged a bullet. Katie showed her psycho ex gf role too.
Casually clicked this from my algorithm and now I’m straight up taking notes.
Fantastic analysis! It was difficult to watch Greg put his heart on the line, open up to her and leave feeling rejected. I'm guessing Katie is under a great deal of pressure to fulfill contractual obligations and not do as her predecessor did in the previous season. As I watched, it brought to mind "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. If there's any credence to his theory, I'm guessing Greg's isn't "words of affirmation" and may, in part, be why he's not understanding what Katie is trying to say to him and having great difficulty reading between the lines? I'm guessing his may be physical touch and more of that may have helped him better understand her feelings? It was interesting when she said: "What do you need to know?" It seemed clear what he wanted to know and I wonder if that statement may have contributed to possible feelings of not being seen, heard or understood by her. I was hoping she'd say to him something to the effect of "I'm not going anywhere" because he seemed to be "the one" in her eyes. It may have given him just enough hope to hold on until the end-hard to say. It may be a statement that would fly under the studio's radar as well because it's open to interpretation. I'm curious how this ends and look forward to your next analysis!
I don't watch this show so I don't know what happens next but I've loved these reaction videos. Very interesting insights and a nice change of pace from the 90DF couples. Can't wait for the next one
You are SO GOOD at what you do!! Just the way you explain things in this video and others has helped me even understand more about my own relationship and life! I don’t think you’ll read this but I just wanted to say thank you!!! Your insight and videos have been so educational.
If I was this guys big brother, I’d tell him to that she doesn’t owe him anything. I’d say what can you control in this situation? And then I’d remind him that she will make a decision and it’s up to him to stick around if he believes it’s worth it. He needs to have the confidence to deal with his emotions and not make it about how she’s reacting.
i've definitely been greg, so sad. hopefully this can be a learning experience for him
Thank you for the analysis Dr. Kirk Honda! :)
This was the best review of this moment! Thanks :)
“On Hulu, they’ve got Rick and Morty…” 😂 😂
😆😆😆
I absolutely love your assessment of this situation. wow, this was great.
Wait please keep going. Uh this is like a cliff hanger lol!! It's so nice to hear Dr. Hondas professional insight on these moments and situations
As soon as I watched this episode I said "goodness I hope Dr. Honda covers this fight."
"Maybe he'll wake up and feel better" ..... oh no.... don't get your hopes up....
Your take on this was spot on!! I really enjoyed watching it! Greg needs therapy!
As soon as I see a man stare with half shut eyes I know they are tremendously angry. You get to know the warning signs from experience. My guess is he has some for of emotional neglect growing up. Possibly from his mum. I hope he gets therapy because it would help him.❤
He is so freaking good at what he does ⭐️
“Dude go to bed” 😂
She kissed his hand and wiped his tears …”I love looking at you” what if she was going to telling him “I love you” then have to say something different and he didn’t catch it?
She was terrified if she didn't say anything it would make it worse, and terrified if she did say something it would be the wrong thing. I know the feeling.
“Good job, Katie-I think she saved it.”
Uggh, how I wish you had been right about that, Dr. Kirk. More than a year later, and I still lament what could have been between these two. They seemed so “in love” to me!
i think that Greg needed to know, good or bad, where he stood with her. at this point, he's clearly fully invested and he knows if he goes any further and winds up getting burned in the end, it will devastate him. i also think that because he had no control of what happened with his father, being in control of this situation is something that he clung to. to control if he stays or if he goes, and prevents the heartbreak. at the very least, i think it would have been him and Blake at the end, and i think he knew that too.
That's a really great point about control
I feel like you should work for Bachelor nation as a therapist, I heard that reality shows need to provide therapy to contestants since it is hard mentally some people can’t handle all the things that come with being on reality TV, and I think you’d be really helpful for them!
Unfortunately they want and encourage the contestants to basically go crazy because it’s better for drama. I bet they told Greg to go on the balcony and catch a look at Blake and Katie on their date to stir up his emotions. It would be great if they had a therapist though
Would really love to see you watch their last conversation after this. Really appreciate your perspective.
One interesting thing to know that might change your perspective on the entire situation that I thought when you suggested he watch hulu - from what I understand they aren't allowed contact with the outside world for the duration of the show. They don't have access to phones or computers or anything like that (except in special cases, like a father who was allowed to facetime his son daily). I've never seen them watching television on the show and I'm not even sure they have a television in the house. From what I understand this helps to speed up the process of "falling in love" for the contestants because really, all they have to do all day is work out/swim, talk to other contestants, and think about their relationships.
Please do Part 3 and comment on the day after when he goes to her room and continues the fight and he leaves.
I’d always thought that knowing when to take a step back as feelings start to become overwhelming was a normal intuitive action - especially in a romantic relationship. But I guess it’s something you mature into.
I can’t wait for you next Katie and Greg video!!
That's interesting. I wonder how a person who is securely attached would react while being in the same position as Greg.
Like Blake maybe
@@Cathee45 I don't believe that Blake is as emotionally invested in Katie as Greg appears to be. Plus Blake has shown a questionable pattern of relationships where he is strongly attached from the get go before any significant emotional connection being formed. I wouldn't consider Blake to be a secured attached person. But, it's just speculation on my part. 😏
@@Cathee45 Personally I can’t stand Blake lol he comes off to me like he really understands the show’s format and is trying to play a character to be cast multiple times in the show
@@Cathee45 I like Blake. People poke fun at him because this is his 3rd bachelorette but I don’t think Clare should count. And he’s not the first to come in mid season. On Matt’s season I was actually thinking that a Katie and him would make a good match.
@@barbararosa9116 I see where you're coming from. He was not one of my favourites but I did like how supportive and caring he was when Katie shared her past traumatic experience (the SA).
The sudden non spon Hulu ad took me out AHHAHAHAH dr Honda is so loveable
Really looking forward to Part 3!!!!!!
I feel like Greg is coming on a bit too intense and too "Emo" for want of a better descriptor. You are on a show. The show needs to play out. Take it down a notch and relax. Plus, for me, there is something very off-putting about how he is behaving here. I like the vulnerability but not the desperation. They haven't known each other that long, he signed up for this gig so I feel it is a bit emotionally manipulative to be making it so dramatic. But I'm sure the producers love it - great for ratings! Not so great for a healthy relationship though.
Totally agree. This whole thing gives her a red flag. Not really self-sabotage but more showing who he really is. Still a sweet man but only for the right woman
Know
Agreed! I commented similar elsewhere...the red flag for me is that even if this wasn't the bachelorette and they were dating in the "regular world"...once he said all that, she still may not have even reciprocated! Idk it is offputting and I appreciated Dr. Honda's perspective on how fragile Greg is and how he likely needs therapy.
This smacks of sexism.
@@mad6andchili against her or him?
His dad died too. My dad died a few years ago. He probably feels betrayed by his dad subconsciously for leaving him. I’ve felt that way and pushed it onto others. So that’s my best guess.
I’m so sorry for your loss. This was where my thoughts went during the betrayal discussion as well. With all of the talk about his dad and his inability to talk about it, it seems this is a viable source of that betrayal feeling, even if he does not recognize it.
Dr. Honda, it might provide some helpful nuance into these reality shows if you watched The Hills reaction videos from Whitney Port on UA-cam. She was on reality TV and her husband is a reality TV producer and they discuss a lot of behind the scenes stuff about reality shows. For example, these shows strategically edit in facial expressions and audio clips at times when they didn’t really happen in order to tell a more captivating story. They also discuss how reality shows often blur the lines between acting and reality, since stars are prompted to hit “story beats” throughout filming, even though the discussions are their own.
I honestly think that the "I just like looking at you" was edited in, especially since he never repeated it at the AFR. Someone also mentioned that Greg is friends w a producer on the show.
Greg for sure was in a flow state during that performance.
Hahaha! “Dude, just go to bed.” It’s sweet how you empathize with the guy.
Please do more of these
Greg resembles Anakin Skywalker here when his fear of losing her takes him to the dark side, which inevitably causes him to lose her. Greg should have just trusted the power of the force of love.
💯💯
I cringed right along with you at the pivotal moment Dr. Honda! .... and I've watched this already 😬😔
Can you do the conversation Katie and Greg had the following day?
I think that he was definitely the front runner until Blake entered the scene.
Please please please 🙏🏽 do Steven and Olga 90 day season 6, his behaviour was very troubling and would love your evaluation of it. Thank you 🤍
Yes!
7:01 LoL nope Katie didn't save it... haha....
I wonder how well the phrase 'I've never felt this way before' correlates with a later divorce?
It's amazing how you are so on point with Greg! The thing is that she CAN show him more emotion and tell him how she feels without saying "love." She has in the past with him. This is the first time she held back and he noticed it. She was more vulnerable with him in their previous dates, but as soon as he gets vulnerable she doesn't. That's why he's losing it. He didn't expect that. In Katie's defense, I think she blanked out on him or was at loss for words.
Love is not what you SAY - it's what you do and it takes TIME for love to grow. LUST is what he feels.
Also recommend watching/reacting to the movie Short Term 12. Amazing portrayal of kids in a group home as well as the emotions of social workers who work with them.
Love your assessment/perspective of things, had a good laugh at the "dude, go to bed". Relateable tbh
I feel that Greg is trying to audition for a soap opera. 🤔 Desperately wanting to be cast into a role, and eventually fandom. I know feelings are not facts, it’s just the vibe I’m getting.
I don't really feel that vibe but who knows? You may be right. I think that many contestants come on this show for publicity. I certainly got that vibe from Brendan on Tayshia's season.