Let's be real, i'm sure it's hard to suddenly hear this diagnosis.... But then again, how fortunate is your little boy to have parents who cared enough to get a diagnosis in the first place! You caught it so early and can provide all the help and therapy from such a young age! We will always love our kids and help them get through difficulies that come up. I wish your little sunshine all the best!!🧡💙💜❤💚!!
Does anyone else cry when they watch steph's videos like this ....it feels so good to hear you speak about what helps and does not help autistic individuals and the knowledge you share so people dont have to go through what we (the current autistic adult generation) went through and how our brains work. Keep up the great work girl ,when you speak from the heart the world stops to take note because they know you speak truth. even if it shows your imperfections you are honest and it means alot 👍❤❤
You blow me away Stephanie! You have so much insight into yourself and kids, I really admire you for all the work you put in for the whole family’s well being. Incredible post today👏🏻👏🏻
I overheard my mom saying I wasn’t a good dancer when I was 4yrs old and it stuck with me. It took me years to dare to dance in public and still struggle in my 30’s. Thanks for making parents aware of this important issue.
Thank you so much for addressing these things! My son is not yet diagnosed but it is very apparent that he is in many ways atypical for lack of a better term. These are all things I have struggled with and are getting better with and things I had to admit and change within myself. Boy it is not easy but once you try and keep trying it makes for a happier and healthier household. My son and I understand each other a lot more and have a great routine down! Thank you so much for your videos! I watch them to gain knowledge as I am very new to the autism community but I also watch because it doesn't make me feel so alone!🥰❣️❣️❣️
Yes. Last tip is just period. Kids do listen and pick up so always try to err on caution around them because my 4 year old TODAY! Didn’t talk until 2 and a half and then really didn’t full talk until 3.5 he can now repeat things he heard before he was speaking
I love your channel ! I’ve been watching a long time . I like how you give your kids respect and how you do not put their bad days out for Everyone to see and how you are careful about what you say about them. Your channel is informative about autism and at the same time you respect your kids feelings and safeguard their dignity. ❤️
Thank you for this raw and honest video! I really admire you because you are strong enough to look at your own weak moments in order to make growth happen for you and your kids. AWESOME!
First, I want to say I love your channel. You offer so much wonderful information! Being an autism mom means you are a superhero! Thank you for sharing. Don’t be too hard on yourself, being a very parent is hard work just trying to figure it all out. The fact that you are reflecting on your parenting in order to improve your skills as well as helping others means you are doing something right. ❤️❤️❤️
I came across your channel a while ago, and I can't remember the reason. I remembered the Autism content, so I'm revisiting. My two year-old has been diagnosed with ASD today and I'm learning to process what I can do to help her the most. Thank you for being a voice and sharing your experiences.
Just found your videos- wow. Wish I had known so much earlier - a) that my son was autistic and b) that videos like this existed. In all honesty when it really came home to me was on Christmas day when he was just turned 3. I was sooo excited and he came down the stairs and pretty much did an about turn and went back up them and had a meltdown and just opened and closed a cupboard door he liked to do that with. He didn’t open a single present that day and was not in the slightest bit interested. I really realised that day, there is something very different about him. I thank you for your honesty and reflections, it really helps us mums and dads out here struggling through to find our feet. I won’t hasten to apologise to my son if I feel I overreacted or didn’t do something right. I have said “you are finding your feet in the world and learning about it and I am learning about how to be a parent, I will make mistakes too.” It is genuinely such a learning experience. I just really wish I had understood and known it was autism a lot earlier - i just had no experience of it.
These are amazing tips. My daughter isn't autistic but this is great general parenting advice. My husband and I have a habit of talking about her in front of her (she's 3) 😬
1 - positive reinforcement, very ABA. I agree, it is a great advice. 2 - apologize for your kid’s diagnosis. Totally agree, there is no obligation to justify. 3 - Loud: put your hand over their mouth. Not good... agree. 4 - home school : I understand, but for me is better a child goes to a special autistic school dedicated center, based on therapies and learning trough it 5 - you are part of the problem; action from parents are reactions from the child. I agree. It is a need to be aware of his special needs. 6 - levels and labels : not helping, true. But somehow is needed to know levels of help they need and that is why. But maybe all should be reviewed and redone to call it properly based on the level of help needed 7- punish for meltdown : true, very difficult to see if is a child meltdown or tantrum... we need to wait when meltdown is gone to assist and change. 8 - frustration, walk away ... it is true is the best option. 9 - expecting things in a way: Xmas and birthdays... true, better to adjust expectations! We project our dreams on them and it may not work. 10 - Do not talk bad in front of the kids, they are more aware than we think. I totally agree with your points, I understand it all ! but after all I am in Holland. Love from... Holland.♥️ thank you for that video.
@Angola L you are rigth, as said for me it is the best option a dedicated school Autism center assuming that is available . I’ m not in Colorado, not in USA, I do understand we will always choose the best option available for Child and Family. ♥️🙂
Omg this just made my day🥰🥰🥰 I have 3 kiddos on the Spectrum and I can’t say maybe 2 or 3 of your mistakes was my mistakes. Ty for give more insight on how things can work and not work.
I don't know if you remember me but I asked you about my grandson and thank you for your advice we did get him diagnosed we are still learning and your videos are very helpful Thank you from the bottom of my heart tomorrow he has his first speech therapy appointment he is speech delayed severely
Thank you so much for what you do. I have 2 kids neither are special needs but you still inspire me and help me learn so much about parenting in general. You are a beautiful person!
Definitely punishing during meltdowns has been my biggest regret. What worked the best for me in getting eye level and just talking to him and giving him a hug !
I agree with you if your kid is struggling at school find another option for them whether it be homeschool or a specialized school. Why make them suffer through.
I got my similar diagnosis as an adult and I immediately forgave a lot. My parents didn't know what they didn't know and if they had, a lot of things they did, I know they would've done differently. As part of the apologizing for the diagnosis, be mindful of even disclosing it. It depends on the child and the situation, but maybe they don't want everyone to know, and ultimately it's their diagnosis.
I need more videos on pregnancy with autistic toddlers. My 2.5 year old likes my round belly and smiles at it but that's it. He's non verbal and I'd love to prepare for what's to come 💗
Wow. I am completely blown away. I only have 2 Autistic children and I struggle often. I am I new subscriber I look forward to recreating this video for my Followers. ❤
I’ve been following u for such a long time & I just got the news my 2yr old needs to be evaluated in July. I’m glad u made this video because I learned so much from it! I’m sure it wasn’t easy. Appreciate u so much ❤️
Good lord were you talking about all my parenting fails lol. Especially the I’m part of the problem oh goodness I cringe thinking of how I was with my son when he was small. I had three kids before and I thought I knew it all WRONGO! I knew squat lol
I’m also an autism mama, My son is 5 yrs old. He’s non-verbal with Mixed Receptive and Expressive Language disorder.. In the early years I watched your videos because I wanted to hopefully get some sort of idea of what life with an autistic child looked like. You gave me peace because I thought if you could do it with multiple children on the spectrum I could do it with my one child. Now after being in the autism community for some time, I feel guilty for watching some of the content. It feels like I stole your child’s privacy.. Your child’s medical records shouldn’t be for “US”the public… The fact that they still wear pull-ups to bed.. Just so many things that should be kept private for your babies sake.. What about their future? I feel like you could still have a great channel if you just shared your knowledge on the different therapies, and resources and programs that can be available without showing their faces and filming the private things that are nobody’s business.. I learned A LOT from you and what I should try and advocate for my child. Information that nobody was giving me.. And I want to thank you.. But, Your kids should come first Mama. Autism is a journey that us parents and family go through with them.. But, in the end it’s their life, they are the ones who will pay the ultimate price in the unforeseen future. Prayers for you and your beautiful children…❤
great video! just to add, negative reinforcement is not same as punishment, negative reinforcement involves the removal of a negative condition to strengthen a behavior. Punishment involves either presenting or taking away a stimulus to weaken a behavior.
Punishment is negative reinforcement too though. You're offering something negative in response to something negative, therefore reinforcing that the said behavior will get the child attention.
When my daughter vocal stims I do cover her mouth but more on and off really fast she thinks it's funny and it makes it a little more tolerable for this mama lol she starts giggling when I start doing that so it's a little different then just covering her mouth I try to make it fun for everybody expecially when it goes all day every day
I have a son who just like Lex he was recently diagnosed and Im still having trouble accepting the diagnosis sometimes I think he not...and other times I see it. He is autistic but its hard, I still learning and I want to help my son reach his full potential but I want to learn to understand where and when..he needs me.
I understand you want to explode Max potential the best you can, but you need a time to process and understand your child, by now the best you can do is to try to get up your spirits up and learn as fast as you can how to help autistic children. At the end it is all about to know the tricks that works with them and like that help them. Autism is not a tragedy, just difficult 😉
Can you describe your 5 year old more in depth. I have been having behavioral issues with my almost 4 year old but I can’t understand. Is she being a typical 4 year old or does she have something off. I have not taken her to the doctor because I’m trying to figure it out myself, which could be bad. I just don’t want want to take her to the doctor and it be something I’m doing. Also I believe it’s a sensory issue. I have started sensory boxes and she has gotten little better.
If you suspect autism or something else you should talk to the doctor so that the child can get help. Even if it is something you are doing, the doctor can help you out and provide advice.
Services for all disabilities are hard get do to funding in the schools specially is the firstvthong cut by school districts after referendums don’t pasc
I’m struggling with my reactions to behaviour traits that my autistic daughter (9 years old) and I need to change but I find it hard. When she’s screaming, yodelling, vocal stimming it hurts my ears and I can’t think. How do I change myself so I don’t tell her to stop?
Thank you for this, we are just starting our journey and I feel like learning from your experience will help me wity son. He's 20 months and we are having his evaluation tomorrow.
You've got Negative Reinforcement wrong. It's actually when you take something 'negative' or aversive away so you get an increase in positive behaviors. Like when it's loud and noisy, so you turn the radio off, it produces a positive effect (child is more calm). Negative reinforcement promotes an increase in positive behaviours always. What you've described is an example of a punishment. So many people get tripped up on the real meaning of Negative reinforcement and punishment. Negative reinforcement always is a positive outcome for the child.
I can understand why you would think that but that's not what negative reinforcement is. We think it's doing something for the child but it's really just teaching them that doing xyz gets them attention and it reinforces the negative behavior.
Strangers in that shopping mall can also be autistic people or other people with sensory etc issues. It seems to me you moved right from excessively apologetic about your kids' behaviour in public to totally inconsiderate. Maybe there's a middle way?..
I’m in the middle way. If it’s in an area no one can escape (restaurant, enclosed space) then we leave for our child and being respectful to those around us. If we are in the grocery store then, it’s not a big deal IMO. We will grab what we need to and move onto another aisle. It’s not in an enclosed space. I have sensory issues and I’d never expect others to not go shopping just because their child might have a meltdown and it might bother me. If they’re being over the top or appearing rude, I apologize for that but I don’t owe anyone an explanation why my child is crying or vocal stimming. There’s a way to accommodate to your child’s needs and still be considerate of others around you but no one should apologize for their or their child’s disability or owe them an explanation and you better bet if my child is melting down in public, THAT will be my priority. If I can relocate them I always choose that but sometimes that’s not a possibility.
@@OurLANDingCrew8 I appreciate your taking the time to respond in more detail about that. Kids shrieking/melting down in shopping centers/public transport, other public places are quite difficult for myself and someone else in my family to endure and it's comforting to know that there are mothers out there who do their best to act as mindfully and respectfully as possible in such situations. You mentioned somewhere that you are a sensory avoider, may I ask you to make a video about yourself and your coping strategies? It seems incomprehensible to me that you can have any issues at all, having this busy lifestyle. It's not that I don't believe you, just can't imagine. Would very much appreciate your making vids about yourself, on various aspects, as a high-functioning adult with autism.
My son was just diagnosed a week and a half ago. He just turned three on Sunday. My beautiful boy.
Remember it is not a tragedy, just more difficult than it was expected. Your beautiful boy will always be. ♥️
Love from Holland.
Let's be real, i'm sure it's hard to suddenly hear this diagnosis....
But then again, how fortunate is your little boy to have parents who cared enough to get a diagnosis in the first place! You caught it so early and can provide all the help and therapy from such a young age! We will always love our kids and help them get through difficulies that come up. I wish your little sunshine all the best!!🧡💙💜❤💚!!
Does anyone else cry when they watch steph's videos like this ....it feels so good to hear you speak about what helps and does not help autistic individuals and the knowledge you share so people dont have to go through what we (the current autistic adult generation) went through and how our brains work. Keep up the great work girl ,when you speak from the heart the world stops to take note because they know you speak truth. even if it shows your imperfections you are honest and it means alot 👍❤❤
You blow me away Stephanie! You have so much insight into yourself and kids, I really admire you for all the work you put in for the whole family’s well being. Incredible post today👏🏻👏🏻
Your honesty and vulnerability is such a tool for other parents and people, thank you!
I overheard my mom saying I wasn’t a good dancer when I was 4yrs old and it stuck with me. It took me years to dare to dance in public and still struggle in my 30’s. Thanks for making parents aware of this important issue.
Thank you so much for addressing these things! My son is not yet diagnosed but it is very apparent that he is in many ways atypical for lack of a better term. These are all things I have struggled with and are getting better with and things I had to admit and change within myself. Boy it is not easy but once you try and keep trying it makes for a happier and healthier household. My son and I understand each other a lot more and have a great routine down! Thank you so much for your videos! I watch them to gain knowledge as I am very new to the autism community but I also watch because it doesn't make me feel so alone!🥰❣️❣️❣️
Yes. Last tip is just period. Kids do listen and pick up so always try to err on caution around them because my 4 year old TODAY! Didn’t talk until 2 and a half and then really didn’t full talk until 3.5 he can now repeat things he heard before he was speaking
I love your channel ! I’ve been watching a long time . I like how you give your kids respect and how you do not put their bad days out for Everyone to see and how you are careful about what you say about them. Your channel is informative about autism and at the same time you respect your kids feelings and safeguard their dignity. ❤️
Thank you for this raw and honest video! I really admire you because you are strong enough to look at your own weak moments in order to make growth happen for you and your kids. AWESOME!
First, I want to say I love your channel. You offer so much wonderful information!
Being an autism mom means you are a superhero! Thank you for sharing. Don’t be too hard on yourself, being a very parent is hard work just trying to figure it all out. The fact that you are reflecting on your parenting in order to improve your skills as well as helping others means you are doing something right. ❤️❤️❤️
I came across your channel a while ago, and I can't remember the reason. I remembered the Autism content, so I'm revisiting. My two year-old has been diagnosed with ASD today and I'm learning to process what I can do to help her the most. Thank you for being a voice and sharing your experiences.
Well welcome back! Just know it's okay to feel WHATEVER feelings you are feeling to process this and be her best advocate. You've got this mama!
Just found your videos- wow. Wish I had known so much earlier - a) that my son was autistic and b) that videos like this existed. In all honesty when it really came home to me was on Christmas day when he was just turned 3. I was sooo excited and he came down the stairs and pretty much did an about turn and went back up them and had a meltdown and just opened and closed a cupboard door he liked to do that with. He didn’t open a single present that day and was not in the slightest bit interested. I really realised that day, there is something very different about him. I thank you for your honesty and reflections, it really helps us mums and dads out here struggling through to find our feet. I won’t hasten to apologise to my son if I feel I overreacted or didn’t do something right. I have said “you are finding your feet in the world and learning about it and I am learning about how to be a parent, I will make mistakes too.” It is genuinely such a learning experience. I just really wish I had understood and known it was autism a lot earlier - i just had no experience of it.
This video hit home in so many ways and I really appreciate you doing it and your honesty.
Thank you for sharing your vulnerabilities and how you have changed. I love that so much. ❤️
You are heaven sent! Please never stop sharing.❤️❤️❤️
These are amazing tips. My daughter isn't autistic but this is great general parenting advice. My husband and I have a habit of talking about her in front of her (she's 3) 😬
1 - positive reinforcement, very ABA. I agree, it is a great advice.
2 - apologize for your kid’s diagnosis.
Totally agree, there is no obligation to justify.
3 - Loud: put your hand over their mouth. Not good... agree.
4 - home school : I understand, but for me is better a child goes to a special autistic school dedicated center, based on therapies and learning trough it
5 - you are part of the problem; action from parents are reactions from the child. I agree. It is a need to be aware of his special needs.
6 - levels and labels : not helping, true. But somehow is needed to know levels of help they need and that is why. But maybe all should be reviewed and redone to call it properly based on the level of help needed
7- punish for meltdown : true, very difficult to see if is a child meltdown or tantrum... we need to wait when meltdown is gone to assist and change.
8 - frustration, walk away ... it is true is the best option.
9 - expecting things in a way: Xmas and birthdays... true, better to adjust expectations! We project our dreams on them and it may not work.
10 - Do not talk bad in front of the kids, they are more aware than we think.
I totally agree with your points, I understand it all ! but after all I am in Holland.
Love from... Holland.♥️ thank you for that video.
@Angola L you are rigth, as said for me it is the best option a dedicated school Autism center assuming that is available . I’ m not in Colorado, not in USA, I do understand we will always choose the best option available for Child and Family. ♥️🙂
Omg this just made my day🥰🥰🥰 I have 3 kiddos on the Spectrum and I can’t say maybe 2 or 3 of your mistakes was my mistakes. Ty for give more insight on how things can work and not work.
I don't know if you remember me but I asked you about my grandson and thank you for your advice we did get him diagnosed we are still learning and your videos are very helpful Thank you from the bottom of my heart tomorrow he has his first speech therapy appointment he is speech delayed severely
This is all very good advice even for parents with typical children!
Thank you so much for what you do. I have 2 kids neither are special needs but you still inspire me and help me learn so much about parenting in general. You are a beautiful person!
Thank you so much for sharing.
I've been struggling quite a bit lately and this video is a huge help!
Definitely punishing during meltdowns has been my biggest regret. What worked the best for me in getting eye level and just talking to him and giving him a hug !
Lex is SO stink’n cute!!!!!!! Even his voice is absolutely adorable!!!!
Ughh right. He's just the cutest🥺🥰
I agree with you if your kid is struggling at school find another option for them whether it be homeschool or a specialized school. Why make them suffer through.
Thank you for sharing this! I really found this helpful, I have done/do some of these things. I found that you explained all this so well.
Stephanie your literally such an amazing mother thank you for this video ❤❤❤❤
I got my similar diagnosis as an adult and I immediately forgave a lot. My parents didn't know what they didn't know and if they had, a lot of things they did, I know they would've done differently. As part of the apologizing for the diagnosis, be mindful of even disclosing it. It depends on the child and the situation, but maybe they don't want everyone to know, and ultimately it's their diagnosis.
I need more videos on pregnancy with autistic toddlers. My 2.5 year old likes my round belly and smiles at it but that's it. He's non verbal and I'd love to prepare for what's to come 💗
Corporal punishment. If you hit an adult for any reason that’s assault. If you do it to a child it’s okay? Why do we have a higher standard for kids
👏🏻 👏🏻 👏🏻 so true!
Wow. I am completely blown away. I only have 2 Autistic children and I struggle often. I am I new subscriber I look forward to recreating this video for my Followers. ❤
I’ve been following u for such a long time & I just got the news my 2yr old needs to be evaluated in July. I’m glad u made this video because I learned so much from it! I’m sure it wasn’t easy. Appreciate u so much ❤️
Thank you! I needed this so much. Perfect timing, it's been a tough week🙏
You described negative reinforcement in a very clear way. I get it now.
I LOVE BEING A MEMBER OF YOUR LANDing Crew! Great Vlog as always! You are so brave. Hell Lex!
Your channel is A HUGE BLESSING TO SO MANY GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR BEAUTIFUL FAMILY
Good lord were you talking about all my parenting fails lol. Especially the I’m part of the problem oh goodness I cringe thinking of how I was with my son when he was small. I had three kids before and I thought I knew it all WRONGO! I knew squat lol
Love the lex cameo he’s the cutest
I just love love love you Steph....thank you for loving on your kiddos. Hang in there momma.
Have a great night Stephanie!
As my son was just diagnosed (messaged you on Instagram) I needed this today! Thank you ❤️
I’m also an autism mama,
My son is 5 yrs old. He’s non-verbal with Mixed Receptive and Expressive Language disorder.. In the early years I watched your videos because I wanted to hopefully get some sort of idea of what life with an autistic child looked like. You gave me peace because I thought if you could do it with multiple children on the spectrum I could do it with my one child. Now after being in the autism community for some time, I feel guilty for watching some of the content. It feels like I stole your child’s privacy.. Your child’s medical records shouldn’t be for “US”the public… The fact that they still wear pull-ups to bed.. Just so many things that should be kept private for your babies sake.. What about their future? I feel like you could still have a great channel if you just shared your knowledge on the different therapies, and resources and programs that can be available without showing their faces and filming the private things that are nobody’s business.. I learned A LOT from you and what I should try and advocate for my child. Information that nobody was giving me.. And I want to thank you.. But, Your kids should come first Mama. Autism is a journey that us parents and family go through with them.. But, in the end it’s their life, they are the ones who will pay the ultimate price in the unforeseen future. Prayers for you and your beautiful children…❤
I needed this today, outside of our home I apologize so much for my son .
great video! just to add, negative reinforcement is not same as punishment, negative reinforcement involves the removal of a negative condition to strengthen a behavior. Punishment involves either presenting or taking away a stimulus to weaken a behavior.
Punishment is negative reinforcement too though. You're offering something negative in response to something negative, therefore reinforcing that the said behavior will get the child attention.
Number 5!!! Yes yes yes!! Say it loud for the people in the back. I am trying to work on my self with this right now.
I love your channel. Lex popping up behind you reminds me of my son. He loves to jump up behind me as well.
I LOVE watching your videos!
I love you so much ❤️ Where did you get the wall art behind you?
Definitely felt the I’m the problem. I had to stop catering to him and wait for his demands for drink or food.
When my daughter vocal stims I do cover her mouth but more on and off really fast she thinks it's funny and it makes it a little more tolerable for this mama lol she starts giggling when I start doing that so it's a little different then just covering her mouth I try to make it fun for everybody expecially when it goes all day every day
I would and still do, is just going outside and breath. (Would do this when my hubby was home.)
I have a son who just like Lex he was recently diagnosed and Im still having trouble accepting the diagnosis sometimes I think he not...and other times I see it. He is autistic but its hard, I still learning and I want to help my son reach his full potential but I want to learn to understand where and when..he needs me.
I understand you want to explode Max potential the best you can, but you need a time to process and understand your child, by now the best you can do is to try to get up your spirits up and learn as fast as you can how to help autistic children. At the end it is all about to know the tricks that works with them and like that help them.
Autism is not a tragedy, just difficult 😉
The best video Thank you 😊
This is so hopeful
Positive thoughts and vibes ❤❤❤👍🍩🍪
Can you describe your 5 year old more in depth. I have been having behavioral issues with my almost 4 year old but I can’t understand. Is she being a typical 4 year old or does she have something off. I have not taken her to the doctor because I’m trying to figure it out myself, which could be bad. I just don’t want want to take her to the doctor and it be something I’m doing. Also I believe it’s a sensory issue. I have started sensory boxes and she has gotten little better.
If you suspect autism or something else you should talk to the doctor so that the child can get help. Even if it is something you are doing, the doctor can help you out and provide advice.
Does Noah feel sad when his siblings go to public school and he doesn’t ? I’m dealing with this issue with my kids
No he goes to center so it doesn’t seem to bother him as much
Loved this steph but curious 🤔what is ur guys disciplinary methods now? Just curious 🤔not trying to be rude
What are your recommendations for education on handling meltdowns, tantrums etc
Services for all disabilities are hard get do to funding in the schools specially is the firstvthong cut by school districts after referendums don’t pasc
For number 1, do you think intrinsic motivation is better than extrinsic motivation?
Every child is different.
First comment love your vlogs
I’m struggling with my reactions to behaviour traits that my autistic daughter (9 years old) and I need to change but I find it hard. When she’s screaming, yodelling, vocal stimming it hurts my ears and I can’t think. How do I change myself so I don’t tell her to stop?
You can get noise cancelling earbuds
I know I’m guilty of doing a lot of these.
Thank you for this, we are just starting our journey and I feel like learning from your experience will help me wity son. He's 20 months and we are having his evaluation tomorrow.
Good luck, and remember, if it goes with Autism, it is not a tragedy, just harder than expected. ❤️🍀
@@LauraGiral thank you 💗
your eyes look soooo grey today!
Question how do you get dad to accept child who is on the spectrum and not yell and discipline as if he is not
The only think I can think about is to talk to him.
Hi
How you know why the acting certain way new parents here
You've got Negative Reinforcement wrong. It's actually when you take something 'negative' or aversive away so you get an increase in positive behaviors. Like when it's loud and noisy, so you turn the radio off, it produces a positive effect (child is more calm). Negative reinforcement promotes an increase in positive behaviours always. What you've described is an example of a punishment. So many people get tripped up on the real meaning of Negative reinforcement and punishment. Negative reinforcement always is a positive outcome for the child.
I can understand why you would think that but that's not what negative reinforcement is. We think it's doing something for the child but it's really just teaching them that doing xyz gets them attention and it reinforces the negative behavior.
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Sandwich it all in between the 5’s. That was me. Getting rid of the 5’s 🙌🏼 makes for happier parent and child😉
Hi 12:11.
Strangers in that shopping mall can also be autistic people or other people with sensory etc issues. It seems to me you moved right from excessively apologetic about your kids' behaviour in public to totally inconsiderate. Maybe there's a middle way?..
I’m in the middle way. If it’s in an area no one can escape (restaurant, enclosed space) then we leave for our child and being respectful to those around us. If we are in the grocery store then, it’s not a big deal IMO. We will grab what we need to and move onto another aisle. It’s not in an enclosed space. I have sensory issues and I’d never expect others to not go shopping just because their child might have a meltdown and it might bother me. If they’re being over the top or appearing rude, I apologize for that but I don’t owe anyone an explanation why my child is crying or vocal stimming. There’s a way to accommodate to your child’s needs and still be considerate of others around you but no one should apologize for their or their child’s disability or owe them an explanation and you better bet if my child is melting down in public, THAT will be my priority. If I can relocate them I always choose that but sometimes that’s not a possibility.
@@OurLANDingCrew8 I appreciate your taking the time to respond in more detail about that. Kids shrieking/melting down in shopping centers/public transport, other public places are quite difficult for myself and someone else in my family to endure and it's comforting to know that there are mothers out there who do their best to act as mindfully and respectfully as possible in such situations.
You mentioned somewhere that you are a sensory avoider, may I ask you to make a video about yourself and your coping strategies? It seems incomprehensible to me that you can have any issues at all, having this busy lifestyle. It's not that I don't believe you, just can't imagine. Would very much appreciate your making vids about yourself, on various aspects, as a high-functioning adult with autism.
I feel like you hit so many nails on the head! I think this is a great video and will be helpful to so many parents!💖