Heard of a woman who left her husband after 50 + yrs. of marriage. When asked why she said 'I want the chance to die happy'. Misery is no way to live, male or female.
What's your point ! Should have left earlier if unhappy. So he could have found someone who cared. Probably what really happened, she got all of the good out of him,then he developed health issues so she bailed . Speaks volumes about a person's character !
Well, we have been married 51 years, since we were both 16 years old. We have lost 3 children. We have faced everything the world can throw at us and we are still rock solid together. People gather around us, because they know we are rock solid and a constant in a mad world.
While I agree with everything you say, hygiene and complacentness is a big issue for women with men. After men have reached their comfortable stage with their wives, they no longer feel like they have to bathe, take care of their teeth, yet expect to have beauty in front of their eyes. Don't forget that we too love to be with a man who cares about his appearance and hygiene.
Thank you for your comment. Women are not the epitome of standards alone. Men should also be responsible in relating to their wives aesthetically. Marriage is or should be a mutual agreement between two. Give and Get!
Let's say we all have areas of strength and weaknesses to work on; having said that few people go to the extreme of high-mentenance and others too negligence. However, if love is the core foundation of any relationship, things should workout as we accept some and change other habits. God bless, love you all❤🙏
Thank u for this wonderful comment hygiene teeth diet smelling nice is very important to me along with everything else that's important in a relationship
Marriage it's all about Loyalty, Trust, understanding, Love and communication. I was married for 37 yrs till death do us part 🙌. Passed away 6 yrs ago of diabetic compilation. .I'm 59 now widow. Just missed him dearly 😭💔
I did everything for my husband of 23 years and totally love and appreciated him and totally loyal. There was no sexless marriage and I never neglected myself either and we never had any conflicts. It's plain straight he cheated because he wanted to and he was going through a mid life crisis. I never cheated on him. I just served him with divorce papers.
Hello have you been claiming and nothing is happening reach out to him, and get your ex back, he does all kinds of spells. Check his last video and get his WhatsApp number. ua-cam.com/channels/FISUB9Vm5SuyhoEGrGuuUA.html 👆👆👆👆 on the video here
After 13 years of marriage I saw my wife meet another man for lunch and he kissed her when she got out of her car. Later when I confronted her she begged me not to leave her and said the affair was over. I caught her two more times without even trying. But this is not why I left. I left a year later because she was still mean and controlling. I thought my daughters were old enough to survive the breakup so I went to live with my mother. I could have forgiven almost anything but I couldn't forgive how mean and disrespectful she was to me. I have been divorced for sixteen years now. I live a peaceful single life.
DJ Tommy Keys That is why I left my first husband. He was controlling that I needed to call and ask permission to go grocery shopping. Mean he first started calling me names then started to threaten to beat me. But I left him and threw him out when I started getting calls from females. Then I knew for sure why he didn't want anything to do with me. He was a mean, controlling, cheating SOB. A few years later I found a man that treated me with respect. We now have been married 52 years. We enjoy each other and content.
It's not about neglecting herself but a rollercoaster of overwhelming duties, especially without a man's support as they grow their family. If a man is engaged in supporting her, she can find time to rest and take care of herself. This way, both the woman and man can be happy together 🥰
Caring too much about the baby/kids is injurious to it/them and the marriage relationship. Parental relationships with their kids are basically contractual, for lack of a better word, but your husband was there before, during and after the kids depart. Know where to prioritise and you will have happy days in your life here on earth and beyond. I wish the mothers can understand this.
My mother & father were married for 53 years until cancer took my father away. They were each other first, last, everything. They compromised and worked on their marriage. It was a 50/50 love. Neither controlled. Both were equal. I’ve been married for 18 years and my marriage is the same way. 50/50 love and we are still going strong.😊
My husband of 45 years married when we’re 20 years old and our married is going strong. He helps a lot at home, good provider and we work as team on everything we do. This doctor is talking about selfish men.
@@Gemmahaven nope, he's not talking about "selfish" men. That's where the problem is. Yall are told about a man's nature and yall go on attack mode. That's where the problem is. Yall so quick to want to be understood but when yall have to learn to understand us then yall go on defensive mode!!🙆♂️🙆♂️🙆♂️my goodness!!!!
@@Gemmahaven EXACTLY. The sad part is all these blogs vlogs and UA-cam channels NEVER make this important addition to their toxic propaganda. Selfish character so so sad and it is fulfilling "Humans will become lovers of themselves."
Hello have you been claiming and nothing is happening reach out to him, and get your ex back, he does all kinds of spells. Check his last video and get his WhatsApp number. ua-cam.com/channels/FISUB9Vm5SuyhoEGrGuuUA.html 👆👆👆👆 on the video here
Reason no. 8: because he can. Don‘t underestimate this reason. I think a lot of people can‘t really say why they leave. We don‘t need a reason to leave. We need a reason to stay!
Your reason to stay is that you vowed before Gd and your loved ones to build a home and a life together with children. Now the if there are problems, you talk it out or go to counseling. Divorce should be the last option.
Indeed I dolls leave because they can and use all the other seven reasons to justify their leaving, but none of those are the real reason. Spouses leave because they can! Period!
Shouldn’t men also keep themselves groomed and tidy after marriage? It works both ways and most of the time, you find men lacking in the areas of personal hygiene yet their women cope with them without running out to other men.
Right on men can look like dog big frumpy big ass belly but yet when a woman gains weight is a problem it is a two-way street the last I heard there was a man and a woman or two in a relationship 🤷
I once saw a cartoon, two fat men sitting by the beach on lounge chairs, three women walk by and the fattest of the two says. The one closest to the water is a bit too fat for my taste.😆😆😆
I just subscribed. Great video. I been marry for 33 yrs. I have learned to let go and not be controlling. I let God control my life first. Hard lesson to learn. Praise God, we have a happy marriage. Greetings from Arizona!!!
@Exposing Hidden Truth 😂🤣 Dude sometimes - i wonder what's there to cheat on in first place that was supposed to jk but standard norm for some - like there fare share child fraud case & there rise & since world is going with Western norm i guess knowing that is better & law system before you jump - since the results will be astonishing. I mean pretty undirectional law system we got ☕ can you just blame your own mistake on your own choice of ignorance .
Most time couple abandon their marriages because their was never love in the first place. Nobody wants to be controlled, both man/woman and submission is a two way thing even though it's emphasized more on the women since the man represent the home. Couples should be accountable to each other and let their partners know what they are up to. This is what I call accountability. Africans seem to get this whole marriage thing wrongly, men always trying to shrink the progress of women. Despite two couples being married, they should be able to give their partner space for their individual growth. Because even before being married God has his individual plan for the both of you. You come together so it becomes easier to achieve it. Remember two heads are better than one. But I always see the men try to shrink their women's growth just to fill high of themselves. This can also make women leave their marriage. It can make me too. That's not good leadership I tell you. Evidence of good leadership always show on your wife and children.
I completely agree. I believe some Africans place men above the woman in an uncomfortable level to the point of arrogance. If humility was implemented than maybe their marriages would last. Sadly, women are expected to be perfect.
Proverbs 14:1 [1]Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. La mujer sabia edifica su casa;Mas la necia con sus manos la derriba.
I’ve been married for 60 years. There are a lot of things that you say are true. You have to walk a mile in your lady’s shoe to understand her tasks. You have to do all of her task (household, kids 24-7) for three months then and only then that you can appreciate her and see how easy you have it at your job.
Narcissistic, and manipulation. Vanity. Human beings are in denial about aging, especially externally. In most accounts they want their spouses to remain youthful. I’m going on thirty-one years of marriage, and we’ve been together for thirty four years. True love shouldn’t be based on appearance or financial means. It’s how well you are able to work together through the hard times, and appreciate the love that is shared between the two. After all in the end , that’s whom is by your side. I hope everyone out there finds what they are looking for in a long term relationship.
Love you guys because you are a Perfect manifestation of a LOVE based relationship. With deep rooted and true LOVE nothing really matters except our partners welbeing and welfare.
In today's world this applies to both men and women.Women leave for the same reasons,especially if they are financially secure. Men should learn from this too.
@@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488 You took the comment right out of my keyboard bro. I was thinking, now didn't she just watch the damn video like the rest of us?
@@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488 Sadly yes....men cheat go home and hide everything.....or leave wife and children for someone young....in church it's always adultery by the husband....!!!
I left my husband because he didn’t respect me. I knew the only way he would learn to respect me was if I left him. He came to me to ask why I left him. I told him, “Because you didn’t respect me.” He treated his next wife with respect, much respect.
Proverbs 14:1 [1]Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. La mujer sabia edifica su casa;Mas la necia con sus manos la derriba.
I wish I would have known about this years ago. My husband died last year and I feel so guilty over a lot of this when I read about it. I think my marriage would have been a lot stronger if someone would have talked to me this way. God Bless you Dr. Jacob.
Exactly, It’s so obvious that children grow up and leave home, what happens then to the marriage 🤷♀️ we have 6 well adjusted adult kids. 4 in Australia you have to bring your kids up to be self sufficient. I almost chucked my babies out with the bath water 🤣 no I didn’t really 😅 but like us they loved to travel and party. They where NEVER my friends, they had plenty of their own, they where my kids, it was my job to equip them with the skills to be decent wives and husbands ✅👏
I agree but also he did wrong and it’s a shame leaving for another woman especially if she’s younger. Just move on because if he did that he wasn’t worth it when trying to fix any issues that made him leave. I don’t know your story why he left but if things couldn’t be worked out and you deserve another man who cares and loves you back
Narcissists leave their wives when they lose control over them too. They make sure they have found another good source of supply first then they discard the wife and carry on controlling the new supply.
My ex was no help at all . No support whatsoever. I was neglected emotionally and my needs didn't matter. Sex was the only thing he wanted from me and that is a lonely feeling. I felt empty inside. I focused on my children because they needed a parent who was there for them . I love my children very much . I was pretty much a mother to him and he appreciated nothing . He felt entitled. I regret wasting my life with a loser. Lesson learned .
Did you give exhusband support and his needs mattered? Did he feel ok? Usualy we get back what we give and often as result give what we get. My wife neglected sex so after few years I did to her the same. She negated anything I said - I said nothing then. Could she be sad that I neglected her emotionaly? She focused on children to distract them from me but it seems they are now not wery gratefull. When she saw a looser in me we divorced- she hoped for my guilt but lost in court. . Now she ask herself how come she was wrong?
@@heathernetto8938, he turned out to be a narcissist. I had no idea there was a name for his actions . I tried to be a good wife there's no pleasing some people ,he is one of them .
@@Mikexception , I absolutely did my best to support him if I believed in what he wanted . Corporal punishment isn't right when it comes to a toddler. Lesson learned, better to stay single in my case . Life is short
I've been in a relationship for six years with the sweetest heart I could of ever met,she was as poor as a door mouse when I met her but shone like a beacon and it's that light that still shines bright today and will always shine untill my eyes close.if you see beyond the surface the heart and soul is what matters but unfortunately only age teachers us that lesson.
You are correct - man in young age think that there will be many more lovely girls but at end he finds that he is gratefull that he couild know "that" one .
I agree with you on everything, that’s why my husband I have been married for 34 years and are still very happy. And I was only 19 and he was 22 and in the military when we got married. Out 2 oldest sons are married and we set such a good example for them they both have very happy marriages for over 12 yrs. Military marriages are extra hard, but with love and respect for each other it works.
Hello have you been claiming and nothing is happening reach out to him, and get your ex back, he does all kinds of spells. Check his last video and get his WhatsApp number. ua-cam.com/channels/FISUB9Vm5SuyhoEGrGuuUA.html 👆👆👆👆 on the video here
Ameeeennn!!! On the point of selfcare. It is so important to dress well as a woman and to be clean! Your own selfasteem will go up. And it is a bonus for your marraige. Amen.
You should be happy that you have been given the antidote to become a better woman for marriage. Humility commands this.. It's funny how a woman is the one asking such a question.. 😂😂😂
I started listening your reasons, but I think the one who wants to leave always finds it, so don't be bothered with it, the right one will not leave you, even if you control him and so on, he will just solve the problem with you without leaving you! 😉🙂
After leaving the wife for many years due to those very reasons why do the very man comes back suggesting that the woman gives him another chance .Truth be told a man who wants variety will have more than seven reasons of leaving his legitimate marriage.
Really, there never enough reason about any spouse to blame another for leaving. We all consciously or unconsciously contribute to a successful or failure relationships. We turn to the wrong resources to fix our issues. If we si mply choose to take responsibilities, and willing to build rather than destroy; many relationships would have been transformed into happy homes and families. 1 Corinthians 13:13 "And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." Matthew 7:3 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" God bless. Thanks
Naw, these 304’s today are opportunist. They marry just to get their kids and half your stuff along with child support. Men need to stop falling for this crap and stop getting married!
@@douglasparise3986 religion has nothing to do with having a workable relationship. "One way" is your perspective because you didn't get your way and the vice-versa. If you sit back and watch what's going on, and realize that nothing out there is worth to fight for except peace and love; you can easily bring the other person closer to you willingly. On the other hand, if you let the ego plays the blaming game (how dare he/she after all that I have done for her/him, or gone through, paid, sacrifice, loved, ... endless drama), you push away the person, and more issues kicks in to make you miserable. In a rare cases, it may be necessary to remove self from situations free of blame, hate, ... still didn't mean ok to point finger.. Nonetheless, following Jesus's teachings and develop spiritual practices definitely is the path to a joyful life / freedom. God bless🙏
There is no specific reason whyan leave. When man found someone who can benefit them more than you do, it can be financial , social status. Man can live with most dumbest of woman if they provide them supply..my dear beautiful woman accept reality and you really don't chase relationship. Embrace breakup and singlehood. Follow your dreams.you don't have to change yourself for anyone. If someone truly love you he will make efforts to be with you.
Hello have you been claiming and nothing is happening reach out to him, and get your ex back, he does all kinds of spells. Check his last video and get his WhatsApp number. ua-cam.com/channels/FISUB9Vm5SuyhoEGrGuuUA.html 👆👆👆👆 on the video here
As for No. 6, Doctor, I want to speak on behalf of the women (Not trying to be nice). I think its a man's duty to make his wife beautiful, by buying her good clothes. Yes, hygiene is a personal responsibility, but in a marriage, the two are one. As a husband, I must point out whats wrong in my wife. And if she can't correct it herself, I will do it for her. Walking out is the last option, when all options are exhausted.
Well I know that he was jobless for many years and didn't have a choice but let me support the family (including him). I didn't mind this and didn't point this out to him. I was patient but his ego couldn't take it finally he left (26 yrs). I didn't chase, didn't blame myself... As far as I know he continues to be jobless and is with another woman who supports him. I am glad to be free of all that idiocy and his laziness 👍🥂.
@@TheSharronW he had a job 4yrs in and out of the 26yrs. He said he was waiting for a better offer, what a con😏, he's 9yrs older I didn't know any better and tried to stick it out...
Dr. You are right. It's the first time I have heard someone speaking the truth. True love can be saved if we change. Surely it should be from both sides. In marriage togetherness is important. 👍👍👍🙏
You are right. We separated after 25 years at the age of 60. I really think there needs to be continued education for married people. We don't have the culture, family, community and village support any more. Our life is very lonely and we live in isolation. Plus our society is teaching women to become masculine which goes against flow of things. We have too much expectations from our partner. Also, there definitely needs to be mandatory education class requirement for people getting married. Most people have no idea what they are getting into.
@@southsweetpies8118 Me too. Both 60, and she finally hit her mid life crisis, got tattooed, drinking, partying with her oh so wise divorced sister . She is the one who served me with divorce papers. When she first told me she wasnt happy 5 years ago, I should have run for the door. Nothing I did , counsoling, etc helped. Oh and no sex was a big issue too. claimed to be dry down there, but yet never did anything about ( supposedly) until she openly began screwing around, just recently. The divorce cant happen fast enough.
@@joerivas9847 At 60…ha ha ..she is a joke ..it’s laughable ..just laugh at her my friend and move on ..nothing more ridiculous than an old granny ho…not a loss my friend …move on and chalk it down as experience
I don’t understand how and why a woman would ever fall in love and want get married from the jump. Women also gets trier of a man. Man think their really good in bed and their Not. Hell it’s man that also let them self go. Trust me it’s comforted that women stay in a marriage especially if he’s paying the bulk of the damn bills. I know a lot of women that are cheating on their husbands for more then 20 something years with different man. Women today have learned to NOT give a damn nor fuck about what their husband’s got going on.
Thank you Dr.Jacob for the video full of wisdom.I totally agree with you that..Men should take the leading role in a relationship and that's how a healthy family is built.Once a Wiseman said "Men build houses and women turn them into homes".
Hmm. I left my first husband. I got bored. My twenty-five year marriage to my soul mate: perfection. He loves an assertive woman. I have been very popular with men for years, and they love strong women. I do agree that a man needs to believe that he is free - NOT 'In control." As for sex: men are the ones with a short shelf life, not women. We can go forever. Men fizzle. If a woman stops being intimate it's because the man is boring in bed. Men need sex; so do women, so please don't assume. Never had any man cheat on me my whole life. Why? Because I know the secret of sex: each person must be willing to train each other overtly to do what turns us on. I agree that cheating is a total no-no. Cheating ruins any marriage. But men can't cheat, either. It annoys me that you are "preaching" to women. As for "lack of appreciation" - men stop appreciating their wives as well. Give me a break. When a man loves a woman, he lavishes her with love and appreciation. If you, a man, are not being appreciated, it's because you are not appreciatING your wife, OR: she doesn't love you. Divorce her asap. Appreciation from both sides is essential. Men: stop comparing your wife of several years with much-younger women. See?It goes both ways. LOVE HER FOR WHO SHE IS! Everything you say here goes for men, too. Today, most children don't actually leave home any more, lol. Children still in the home into their late twenties is a marriage-killer. Kick 'em out! Children are not "glue," by the way. When they grow up they are "adults." Sorry about this, but frankly, women do not like men preaching at them about keeping their men. P.S. As for being well-groomed and dressing well: PLEASE TELL OTHER MEN TO DO THIS FOR WOMEN! I have never seen so many shlumpy men as there are now. Big, fat bellies; ugly shorts and untucked shorts, down at the heels sneakers. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. How dare you? Are there any other women rolling their eyes here?
This is hilarious, but it is so close to home. There is always agape love. Remember, the marriage vows said, “for better or for worse”. And it is a vow before God. Have faith in the Good Lord.
Good for you Babs! The words spoken here by the good Dr. are true. No one want to walk away but to me a marriage is a partnership ordained by God between Man Woman and God. When there is a lack of understanding between the man and the woman, and a lack of the meeting of the minds, then it will not last. Children as beautiful as they are and May be, they do not come before the marriage and the partnership. Just my opinion. Marriage is real!
That's so true about men being in control. I'm a Christian and that's Biblical. After 25 years of marriage my ex didn't wanna be married anymore. That wasnt our problem. He was being emotionally abusive and I wouldn't take it anymore. I left for a little while and wanted him to stop, instead he wanted to be alone. We are friends now. It took years but God has healed my heart from the pain of divorce. I didn't want it. I didn't know how to be with a man who was turning ours kids against me. Everything is better now. ❤ Once you have children together I don't know how you can just totally stop loving your ex spouse. There's always love there, even if we were bad together.
7 reasons why men leave their wives after many years of marriage 1) Control - women controlling the man and having a final say. 2) Sexlessness 3) Extra marital affairs - cheating 4) Lack of appreciation 5) Empty nest - the glue keeping them together is kids & once they leave they are empty 6) Wife neglecting herself 7) Endless conflicts
Understanding and accepting the true commitment of the sacrament of vow of marriage is all that matter to the adults who say YES to thier final decision with thier life journey.
You're doing a wonderful job indeed 👍...not only "ministering" to the married folks and their family relationships but more importantly, passionately drawing people to GOD, Who is The true Creator of the original "Marriage Institution" 💞 And you also encourage them to seek His Grace and come to Faith in His Son Jesus, the only Saviour. HalleluYAH! 🙌 Praise the Lord! 👏Amen 😇 GOD BLESS you Dr. Jacob 👼
We used to spend long weekends away alone together on our anniversary. At the end he started inviting our friends on our trips. He never asked me first. I would have said no. That time was to invest in our relationship.
I know with experience, that if we keep Jesus Christ at the centre of our marriage, going to him for all our solutions, our marriage relationship gets better, happier, exciting & Stronger. Praise Jesus!!
One word to you my Brother.... you're absolutely RIGHT on your presentation. You're RIGHT... there is no absolute Permanent in life....I learn this in my life. Great knowledgeable.❤️
This just sounds like a beat down on women … We are ALL responsible for our own feelings … It’s not OUR job to spend time blowing smoke up you know where to help this individual feel SPECIAL …. It’s a two way street … Men leave marriages after many years when the life partner decides she can no longer tolerate the selfish …. self serving …. thoughtless behaviour …. she now realises how much she brings to the table and what her value is … So maybe you should give a talk about being a genuine … Loving … considerate …. Supportive partner who cares for his wife and children as much as he cares for himself …. Talk about …You give nothing you get nothing … Talk about how her sacrifices have assisted him with security in his life and allowed HIM to live his dreams … To climb his ladder of success … Your little chat here makes out that ALL women have issues ,…. Women don’t withhold their love if they’re balanced in their views and are valued by their partners …. Men leave because women have had a gut full of their bs … These men who demean their wives then expect them to just take it are delusional … And clearly have NO idea about how relationships are suppose to work … Change can only come about when the individual sees his / her issues and decides to address it themselves … You can’t try and change another it never works because without ownership of what needs to be addressed it becomes an external shift which never lasts … You can never make someone see something in themselves if they’re not ready or willing to see it for themselves …
I can't agree more. Daktaris arguement is so one sided and biased. It assumes that all men are angels and are all socialized the same way. It is unfortunate.
Great It's a 2 way traffic We deserve love as we love Listened to as we listened Protected as we protect Honesty and genuineness applies Cleanliness on both Meekness on both Lastly fear of God on both
Women often control men way beyond what any human being can handle due to how they have been taught or due to selfishness. Dr. Jacob was right spot on with the #1 issue of why men leave their marriage.
Here's 1 Reason. Stupidity. Instead of communicating and WORKING on there marriage they end it and look for another Woman to make them Happy. But they soon find out the problem wasn't their wives but Them.
Women are very ignorant most times when it comes to such things. Especially when women are controlling the marriage for a long time.. they will never realize their defects in Marriage
Being male, I can see why you put forth the reasons for men leaving their wives. Many women leave their intolerable husbands too. For some of the same reasons.
After leaving, they try what is out there, they always regret and try to come back. He thought the grass was greener on the other side, I moved after the divorce, I accomplished more as a divorcé than whe I was married. It was a gift for him to leave.
1. Men hate being controlled 2. Sexlessness ❤️ 3. Wife cheated 4. Lack of appreciation 5. Emptiness (Children leave) 6. Wife neglecting herself (Stops staying physically beautiful) ❤️ MEN ARE VISUAL. 7. Conflicts and arguments
My husband of forty eight years walk away and I am not guilty of none of the 7 were doing fine until we inherited a piece of land he told me that he doesn't love me anymore
I have been married to my husband for almost 35 years and neither one of us ever cheated on the other! WE are partners 50/50 but we expect 30% from the other and GIVE 70%. He has always treated me like a princess therefore I have always made sure that I looked, smelled, and acted like his princess! I have always taken care of myself because he has always taken care of me!!
How did you make him give of himself so? I try to give my hubby praise and general affection and complements.. and give him space. I’m careful not to nag. He only ignores me though. I don’t like to fight. I don’t know what to do better. I even lost 25 lbs. but he hardly seems to notice. I need better strategy
Omg he said men need sex…😒men need to learn how to please their wives first. That’s one reason why sex toys are in such demand. A lot of men just don’t know what to do periodtttttt!!!!
@@truffaut650truffaut6 who said they have no clew .. They do is just that the come for it when they are in need and many of them have forgotten we also needed it If not what else wouldn’t you get from you family
My hysband has pleased me twice sexually, and it wasn't with intercourse. Men have orgasims just looking at a woman, I have yet to have any physical pleasure, so it became, just get it over with and get off me!!!
I totally agree this is why we as a woman don’t want it. Togetherness passion and good energy connecting. A woman need it to. Give it to me right are nothing at all
1' lack of real communication , 2' boredom , 3' loss of intimacy and emotional connection , 4'partner maybe controlling , 5' got involved way to young , 6' infidelity , 7' health issues
More comments: My husband and I were married for many years before he died. I did not look like I did when I was young, but neither did he. He said I was beautiful inside . He loved me and this is the difference between fickle men that are immature and good Christain men who really do love their wives and are faithful. No marriage is perfect , but love overrides those times, if there are those times. There are book published about why men cheat. They say because men go through mid life crisis. The men wants a change regardless of how ugly, beautiful or good their spouse is, they men want to change their jobs, their friends, their life style. How they handle this common problem with men varies. Women dont blame yourselves. Some men never matures. Period.
Excellent common sense. Women don't blame themselves when they are doing their best. This is typical sexist BS. Blame it on e the innocent and the victim crap.
@@samsilverman824 I have been married to my husband for 21 years. We support one another. I am neither property nor any man's servant. Men will always leave either by the door or by dying. That's the reality. If my husband wants to leave, he knows where the door is. he has known where the door is since the days we got married. Just as I know where the door is. Equality not ownership. I am not his dog to be lead around on a leash, neither is he. We are equal and very strong. A woman should serve her husband? F** that BS.
This is the best comment I read .. they always make it seems as if it’s only men that have reasons to break up with a woman, as if women don’t have reasons to break up with men too.. it’s such a one sided thing, I have noticed..
No they’re not.. I know many many Husbands/ Wives That still together till the end… They aren’t about these break up trends .. they don’t believe in Love they Believe in Loyalty !!!! they are in this world but not of it and that makes the bond Peaceful and enduring !!!! 32 years Baby !!!!
Let God blessed ur heart and blessed ur marriage..only the smart ones will listen instead of arguing his points but don't take the lessons teaches here
The first two comments was enough for me! Equal respect for each other and if couples argue, give yourselves a "time out" to get your "shit" together. NO FISTS or SLAPS. 43 years strong. And please consider the children and grandchildren..........
Men run us in the ground deplet all of our good energy by being childish irresponsible and inconsiderate. Most times they are looking for a mother they can sleep with.. then it’s our fault that they leave smh…. I’ll rather be alone who’s loving us women when we are giving everything to these men we have to provide everything for everyone in the relationship most time neglecting our own wants and needs to ensure everyone else is happy
This would apply for me as a wife not only for a husband I've been married nearly 30 years I could have leave my husband but I couldn't afford hurting my son feelings ,spot on all that reasons!! 🥺🥺Apply to my husband
Huh! When I was sick, none of the bills were paid on time! 32 years he never gave me a present for my birthday or anniversaries over $10!! He lied to everyone, including me about being a pharmacist and just not wanting to practice; he was never even enrolled in college!!! He never had any control over his home environment with his mom and dad and he often took that out on me!!! I think the marriage lasted so long because I made so many allowances for him including when he lied!!! I gave him the opportunity to tell the truth within a couple of hours with no repercussions!!! Men who say or think they want control don't know how run their own lives and purposely look for a woman who can take control!!!!! I was simply a scapegoat for all his problems!!!!!
My husband proposed to me. We lived for 35 together. Then he leaves us. He never had enough money. He wanted sex all the time. He was weak, always put blame on me. He didn't direct the children the correct path. But blamed me for everything. His daughter threw him out if her home. His son wanted to hit him. But i still love him though we are separated. I am strong and happy staying alone. Working in USA . I cry why did it had to be me?
I really enjoy listening to you!! You are spot on on relationships. I was married for 30 years, happily, so much love. No regrets!! Love, people!! Forget possessions & competing, just love & Love God!! You will have a good life maybe even spectacular. Love is God given.
Wonderfull, These are mega words of wisdom, It looks like you are the Solomon of this time. Blessed is the woman who gave birth to you. And I really bless the Almighty through His grace who has blessed you with such kind of wisdom and so you bless us Too. Thanks so much Dr., I have learnt a lot from yr teachings. To have spoken in my life as you knew who I am
Wonderfully presented, still this may annoy opposite sex never mind let's look at postive's. Marriage and family is a balanced act, a devine relationship cannot be measured in terms of value. Love should be pure from either direction
I came across your videos just yesterday and I cannot stop watching. You are spot on with all the things you say . It’s very timely with what’s happening in my life at this present time. UA-cam’s very best real talk.
Wow awesome message Dr. K.N. Jacob, so vital information and first time watching your channel and I have to subscribe as I heard you sharing the first reason. God continued blessing on your ministry sir.
And of course there are those who say "to hell with this" and give up on the marriage, but remain as a roommate. The "marriage" dies and the relationship sort of morphs into something else. And the wife may remain essentially clueless.
Men don't just leave, they were never there, men don't just leave, they left a long time ago in the relationship & marriage. It is too much out there for a man to stay true & real. I know this, I sit among college students daily & these young ladies & men are all in competition with one another. The young ladies are now acting like men, they say I saw my mom go through with my father I'm not going through that & a lot of young men are going both ways they don't care anymore
So basically pander to all the Narcissistic tendencies in your male partner and you should be ok. Except you will be a shell of a person. Find a man who truly loves you and you may actually communicate. Love respect and communication that’s the key
And please remember to subscribe to my UA-cam Channel to access over 890 inspirational videos free of charge. Here’s the link… ua-cam.com/users/DrKNJacob
It's about the two parties not really men or women,it's vise vasa,it all needs love courage, commitment trust and wisdom application for women and knowledge for men (biblical),to sustain marriage.Thanks,I'm EVANZ here in Bungoma West Hospital KENYA.
Heard of a woman who left her husband after 50 + yrs. of marriage. When asked why she said 'I want the chance to die happy'. Misery is no way to live, male or female.
Kikikiki...... dying happy
Good for you. We all deserve happiness.
She didnt get it. The change begis in ourselves. "Doing the same thing and expecting a change" is the well known expression.
Exactly
What's your point ! Should have left earlier if unhappy. So he could have found someone who cared. Probably what really happened, she got all of the good out of him,then he developed health issues so she bailed .
Speaks volumes about a person's character !
Well, we have been married 51 years, since we were both 16 years old. We have lost 3 children. We have faced everything the world can throw at us and we are still rock solid together. People gather around us, because they know we are rock solid and a constant in a mad world.
Beautiful Godly marriage 🙏❤️ amen to that.
Beautiful & very inspired other couples to be strong what ever the struggles have to be faced. GBU
Great 2 hear💕
Good on you guys! That’s fantastic!
The two of you are a match made in heaven!🎯❤ My condolences to you and yours for the losses of your children🙏🏾
While I agree with everything you say, hygiene and complacentness is a big issue for women with men. After men have reached their comfortable stage with their wives, they no longer feel like they have to bathe, take care of their teeth, yet expect to have beauty in front of their eyes. Don't forget that we too love to be with a man who cares about his appearance and hygiene.
Thank you for your comment. Women are not the epitome of standards alone. Men should also be responsible in relating to their wives aesthetically. Marriage is or should be a mutual agreement between two. Give and Get!
Let's say we all have areas of strength and weaknesses to work on; having said that few people go to the extreme of high-mentenance and others too negligence. However, if love is the core foundation of any relationship, things should workout as we accept some and change other habits.
God bless, love you all❤🙏
Thank u for this wonderful comment hygiene teeth diet smelling nice is very important to me along with everything else that's important in a relationship
Y'all always find a way to make it the man's issue.
@@melisshalindsey4032 Great Point
Marriage it's all about Loyalty, Trust, understanding, Love and communication. I was married for 37 yrs till death do us part 🙌. Passed away 6 yrs ago of diabetic compilation. .I'm 59 now widow. Just missed him dearly 😭💔
You are so right. Agree 110%%
And I’m so sorry for your loss. Remember the good times, your loved one will always be with you in your heart
Sorry for your loss, you are still very blessed to have those beautiful memories!
You married quite Young. Do not feel sorry for the loss of your beloved just thank God and celebrate for the time you so enjoyed together
Sorry. But alot of men. Just don't say anything. They take cheating to thier death bed. I am not saying he did that 2 you. Alot of guys do.
I did everything for my husband of 23 years and totally love and appreciated him and totally loyal. There was no sexless marriage and I never neglected myself either and we never had any conflicts. It's plain straight he cheated because he wanted to and he was going through a mid life crisis. I never cheated on him. I just served him with divorce papers.
Hello have you been claiming and nothing is happening reach out to him, and get your ex back, he does all kinds of spells. Check his last video and get his WhatsApp number. ua-cam.com/channels/FISUB9Vm5SuyhoEGrGuuUA.html 👆👆👆👆 on the video here
Sorry that happened.
Good on you but some men wont let you go,
@@vivhiggins5656 What do you mean they won't let go?
@@deirdremorris9234 Why are you sorry?
After 13 years of marriage I saw my wife meet another man for lunch and he kissed her when she got out of her car. Later when I confronted her she begged me not to leave her and said the affair was over. I caught her two more times without even trying. But this is not why I left. I left a year later because she was still mean and controlling. I thought my daughters were old enough to survive the breakup so I went to live with my mother. I could have forgiven almost anything but I couldn't forgive how mean and disrespectful she was to me. I have been divorced for sixteen years now. I live a peaceful single life.
big up man,it's not easy for any man,to let go of family.......much respect....,
Amen
Smart & lucky mam
GOOD FOR YOU.
DJ Tommy Keys That is why I left my first husband. He was controlling that I needed to call and ask permission to go grocery shopping. Mean he first started calling me names then started to threaten to beat me. But I left him and threw him out when I started getting calls from females. Then I knew for sure why he didn't want anything to do with me. He was a mean, controlling, cheating SOB. A few years later I found a man that treated me with respect. We now have been married 52 years. We enjoy each other and content.
Narcissist personality disorder is also a major cause in today’s society. Which many are not aware of.
👍100% correct ma'm
That's the first reason a woman will walk out.
@@honeybadger8942 Yes Honey, but after enduring years of this, a man may walk out too.
@@haimlevy1950 True !
Very true. I agree with you 100% .
It's not about neglecting herself but a rollercoaster of overwhelming duties, especially without a man's support as they grow their family. If a man is engaged in supporting her, she can find time to rest and take care of herself. This way, both the woman and man can be happy together 🥰
🙌🏻
You just said a mouthful
Man should support with out being told what and how to do.
Caring too much about the baby/kids is injurious to it/them and the marriage relationship. Parental relationships with their kids are basically contractual, for lack of a better word, but your husband was there before, during and after the kids depart. Know where to prioritise and you will have happy days in your life here on earth and beyond. I wish the mothers can understand this.
What will you argue for all the mothers who are 'awoke' and want to abandon their post for socialpolitical reasons.
My mother & father were married for 53 years until cancer took my father away. They were each other first, last, everything. They compromised and worked on their marriage. It was a 50/50 love. Neither controlled. Both were equal. I’ve been married for 18 years and my marriage is the same way. 50/50 love and we are still going strong.😊
My husband of 45 years married when we’re 20 years old
and our married is going strong. He helps a lot at home, good provider and we work as team on everything we do. This doctor is talking about selfish men.
@@Gemmahaven nope, he's not talking about "selfish" men. That's where the problem is. Yall are told about a man's nature and yall go on attack mode. That's where the problem is. Yall so quick to want to be understood but when yall have to learn to understand us then yall go on defensive mode!!🙆♂️🙆♂️🙆♂️my goodness!!!!
@@Gemmahaven EXACTLY. The sad part is all these blogs vlogs and UA-cam channels NEVER make this important addition to their toxic propaganda. Selfish character so so sad and it is fulfilling "Humans will become lovers of themselves."
@@65May2 that was a time of true care for family
Hello have you been claiming and nothing is happening reach out to him, and get your ex back, he does all kinds of spells. Check his last video and get his WhatsApp number. ua-cam.com/channels/FISUB9Vm5SuyhoEGrGuuUA.html 👆👆👆👆 on the video here
Reason no. 8: because he can. Don‘t underestimate this reason. I think a lot of people can‘t really say why they leave. We don‘t need a reason to leave. We need a reason to stay!
Your reason to stay is that you vowed before Gd and your loved ones to build a home and a life together with children. Now the if there are problems, you talk it out or go to counseling. Divorce should be the last option.
@@lisar915r9 Absolutely right!
Good reason not to leave is to stick to given to somone and himself as well word. Someone who do not treat seriously himself is no worthy any trust.
Well said! Or, said otherwise, we need at least one more reason to stay than to leave.
Indeed I dolls leave because they can and use all the other seven reasons to justify their leaving, but none of those are the real reason. Spouses leave because they can! Period!
Shouldn’t men also keep themselves groomed and tidy after marriage? It works both ways and most of the time, you find men lacking in the areas of personal hygiene yet their women cope with them without running out to other men.
Right on men can look like dog big frumpy big ass belly but yet when a woman gains weight is a problem it is a two-way street the last I heard there was a man and a woman or two in a relationship 🤷
I once saw a cartoon, two fat men sitting by the beach on lounge chairs, three women walk by and the fattest of the two says. The one closest to the water is a bit too fat for my taste.😆😆😆
Very true
The video is on why men leave, not the other way around.
Yes yes ....always shift the blame to the men.
I just subscribed. Great video. I been marry for 33 yrs. I have learned to let go and not be controlling. I let God control my life first. Hard lesson to learn. Praise God, we have a happy marriage. Greetings from Arizona!!!
So it,s ok to cheat ☕
@Exposing Hidden Truth 😂🤣 Dude sometimes - i wonder what's there to cheat on in first place that was supposed to jk but standard norm for some - like there fare share child fraud case & there rise & since world is going with Western norm i guess knowing that is better & law system before you jump - since the results will be astonishing.
I mean pretty undirectional law system we got ☕ can you just blame your own mistake on your own choice of ignorance .
@@silverwings8486 😆
Most time couple abandon their marriages because their was never love in the first place. Nobody wants to be controlled, both man/woman and submission is a two way thing even though it's emphasized more on the women since the man represent the home. Couples should be accountable to each other and let their partners know what they are up to. This is what I call accountability. Africans seem to get this whole marriage thing wrongly, men always trying to shrink the progress of women. Despite two couples being married, they should be able to give their partner space for their individual growth. Because even before being married God has his individual plan for the both of you. You come together so it becomes easier to achieve it. Remember two heads are better than one. But I always see the men try to shrink their women's growth just to fill high of themselves. This can also make women leave their marriage. It can make me too. That's not good leadership I tell you. Evidence of good leadership always show on your wife and children.
I couldn't have said it better!!
If God has all the plans why would mankind suffer?
I completely agree. I believe some Africans place men above the woman in an uncomfortable level to the point of arrogance. If humility was implemented than maybe their marriages would last. Sadly, women are expected to be perfect.
Ok then , women can remain separate n single n become , grow as research professor with high salary
Proverbs 14:1
[1]Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.
La mujer sabia edifica su casa;Mas la necia con sus manos la derriba.
I’ve been married for 60 years. There are a lot of things that you say are true. You have to walk a mile in your lady’s shoe to understand her tasks. You have to do all of her task (household, kids 24-7) for three months then and only then that you can appreciate her and see how easy you have it at your job.
“Children are part of my family not part of my marriage”,👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Hi dear how are you doing?
I love this. This is strong
Amen 👍
Narcissistic, and manipulation. Vanity. Human beings are in denial about aging, especially externally. In most accounts they want their spouses to remain youthful. I’m going on thirty-one years of marriage, and we’ve been together for thirty four years. True love shouldn’t be based on appearance or financial means. It’s how well you are able to work together through the hard times, and appreciate the love that is shared between the two. After all in the end , that’s whom is by your side. I hope everyone out there finds what they are looking for in a long term relationship.
True
I've been married 38 years and I'm growing old with my wife so I don't notice the change it's so gradual and that's why you should get married young
Just don't look at old photos and you'll be fine
Love you guys because you are a Perfect manifestation of a LOVE based relationship. With deep rooted and true LOVE nothing really matters except our partners welbeing and welfare.
@@lohdoris6229 thank you, I taught my kids the toughest thing in life is to find true love everything else is easy
In today's world this applies to both men and women.Women leave for the same reasons,especially if they are financially secure. Men should learn from this too.
Yes yes...always shift the blame onto the men. Got it.
@@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488 You took the comment right out of my keyboard bro. I was thinking, now didn't she just watch the damn video like the rest of us?
Well said.
Women cause nothing , Just men .
@@rev.jimjonesandthekool-aid4488 Sadly yes....men cheat go home and hide everything.....or leave wife and children for someone young....in church it's always adultery by the husband....!!!
Hmmm… some men create environments that they want to later leave.
“Telling women don’t wear makeup“
“Telling women whatever you want”
Respect comes naturally with love! Without respect there will be no love! When respect disappear , love follows, resulting to separation!
I left my husband because he didn’t respect me. I knew the only way he would learn to respect me was if I left him. He came to me to ask why I left him. I told him, “Because you didn’t respect me.” He treated his next wife with respect, much respect.
100%
@@deborahroper3694 too bad he couldn't do that for you!
Proverbs 14:1
[1]Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.
La mujer sabia edifica su casa;Mas la necia con sus manos la derriba.
I wish I would have known about this years ago. My husband died last year and I feel so guilty over a lot of this when I read about it. I think my marriage would have been a lot stronger if someone would have talked to me this way. God Bless you Dr. Jacob.
I'm sorry for your loss. But Don't live the rest of your life in pain. Correct, Forgive 💖 Heal yourself and enjoy your life.
@@michelle-zd2nc Thank you❤
So sorry for your loss! Please be good to yourself. We all screw up. Dont relive those moments.
@@deirdremorris9234 Thank you ❤
These reasons apply to both sides to be fair and every marriage goes through challenges and they test their commitments to God and to each other.
Children are part of my family, not part of my marriage. Brilliant. Love this.
Yes, it is brilliant.
Profound
Yes. My wife neglecting our relationship in favor of (micro-managing) the children is a sad point in my marriage.
@@zvipatent I agree completely!
Exactly, It’s so obvious that children grow up and leave home, what happens then to the marriage 🤷♀️ we have 6 well adjusted adult kids. 4 in Australia you have to bring your kids up to be self sufficient. I almost chucked my babies out with the bath water 🤣 no I didn’t really 😅 but like us they loved to travel and party. They where NEVER my friends, they had plenty of their own, they where my kids, it was my job to equip them with the skills to be decent wives and husbands ✅👏
I'm 60 years old and can say with complete certainty that men who leave their wives after many years is because there's another women. That's all.
After the sex stops.
I agree but also he did wrong and it’s a shame leaving for another woman especially if she’s younger. Just move on because if he did that he wasn’t worth it when trying to fix any issues that made him leave. I don’t know your story why he left but if things couldn’t be worked out and you deserve another man who cares and loves you back
Narcissists leave their wives when they lose control over them too. They make sure they have found another good source of supply first then they discard the wife and carry on controlling the new supply.
That was what happened in my marriage .
Cincin totally agree with you. It's always another woman.
My ex was no help at all . No support whatsoever. I was neglected emotionally and my needs didn't matter. Sex was the only thing he wanted from me and that is a lonely feeling. I felt empty inside. I focused on my children because they needed a parent who was there for them . I love my children very much . I was pretty much a mother to him and he appreciated nothing . He felt entitled. I regret wasting my life with a loser. Lesson learned .
That's where the problem lies. He wants a wife...not a mother.
Did you give exhusband support and his needs mattered? Did he feel ok? Usualy we get back what we give and often as result give what we get. My wife neglected sex so after few years I did to her the same. She negated anything I said - I said nothing then. Could she be sad that I neglected her emotionaly? She focused on children to distract them from me but it seems they are now not wery gratefull. When she saw a looser in me we divorced- she hoped for my guilt but lost in court. . Now she ask herself how come she was wrong?
@@heathernetto8938, he turned out to be a narcissist. I had no idea there was a name for his actions . I tried to be a good wife there's no pleasing some people ,he is one of them .
@@Mikexception , I absolutely did my best to support him if I believed in what he wanted . Corporal punishment isn't right when it comes to a toddler. Lesson learned, better to stay single in my case . Life is short
Did you work or was you a stay at home wife?
I walked away after 20yrs with 4 children. Never regret.
If Your Still Single Can We Chat?
@@ericfreshcorn3590
Divorced not single. Single means never been married. People don't seem to understand that.
@@eddieboggs8306 There Is A Huge Diffrence
If there is one thing I love about what you do, is your Honesty
I've been in a relationship for six years with the sweetest heart I could of ever met,she was as poor as a door mouse when I met her but shone like a beacon and it's that light that still shines bright today and will always shine untill my eyes close.if you see beyond the surface the heart and soul is what matters but unfortunately only age teachers us that lesson.
You are correct - man in young age think that there will be many more lovely girls but at end he finds that he is gratefull that he couild know "that" one .
I agree with you on everything, that’s why my husband I have been married for 34 years and are still very happy. And I was only 19 and he was 22 and in the military when we got married. Out 2 oldest sons are married and we set such a good example for them they both have very happy marriages for over 12 yrs. Military marriages are extra hard, but with love and respect for each other it works.
I have been married fifty years, so shut up. It means NOTHING!!!
Good for you both !
Hello have you been claiming and nothing is happening reach out to him, and get your ex back, he does all kinds of spells. Check his last video and get his WhatsApp number. ua-cam.com/channels/FISUB9Vm5SuyhoEGrGuuUA.html 👆👆👆👆 on the video here
40 years in our relationships
No dull moment , in our vocabulary
Is loving always with one another .
Congratulations
Ameeeennn!!! On the point of selfcare. It is so important to dress well as a woman and to be clean! Your own selfasteem will go up. And it is a bonus for your marraige. Amen.
This is nice 👍. Please also let's have "why women leave their men"
True! Visevisa
This is a man. How would he know why a woman does things? He is talking like a man and why men do what they do...
You should be happy that you have been given the antidote to become a better woman for marriage. Humility commands this..
It's funny how a woman is the one asking such a question.. 😂😂😂
Allow for a two sides of the coin. He is an expert counselor. Let's have the other side
"He married you for sexual initimacy"😳🤣
I started listening your reasons, but I think the one who wants to leave always finds it, so don't be bothered with it, the right one will not leave you, even if you control him and so on, he will just solve the problem with you without leaving you! 😉🙂
After leaving the wife for many years due to those very reasons why do the very man comes back suggesting that the woman gives him another chance .Truth be told a man who wants variety will have more than seven reasons of leaving his legitimate marriage.
Well he'll die a miserable life😒😒
Can you elaborate on your point, Curtis?
I don't know if anyone wants to feel controlled
You said it all
Really, there never enough reason about any spouse to blame another for leaving. We all consciously or unconsciously contribute to a successful or failure relationships. We turn to the wrong resources to fix our issues. If we si mply choose to take responsibilities, and willing to build rather than destroy; many relationships would have been transformed into happy homes and families.
1 Corinthians 13:13
"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
Matthew 7:3
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?"
God bless. Thanks
Naw, these 304’s today are opportunist. They marry just to get their kids and half your stuff along with child support. Men need to stop falling for this crap and stop getting married!
Great Point
Well said!
Its not going to work if its a one way street.i don't care how "religious " a person claims to be. Narcissism is rampant
@@douglasparise3986 religion has nothing to do with having a workable relationship.
"One way" is your perspective because you didn't get your way and the vice-versa.
If you sit back and watch what's going on, and realize that nothing out there is worth to fight for except peace and love; you can easily bring the other person closer to you willingly. On the other hand, if you let the ego plays the blaming game (how dare he/she after all that I have done for her/him, or gone through, paid, sacrifice, loved, ... endless drama), you push away the person, and more issues kicks in to make you miserable.
In a rare cases, it may be necessary to remove self from situations free of blame, hate, ... still didn't mean ok to point finger..
Nonetheless, following Jesus's teachings and develop spiritual practices definitely is the path to a joyful life / freedom.
God bless🙏
June of 2022 will be 70 years of married to the same woman for me. I was 18 when we were married.
Good I Sir
There is no specific reason whyan leave. When man found someone who can benefit them more than you do, it can be financial , social status. Man can live with most dumbest of woman if they provide them supply..my dear beautiful woman accept reality and you really don't chase relationship. Embrace breakup and singlehood. Follow your dreams.you don't have to change yourself for anyone. If someone truly love you he will make efforts to be with you.
Hello have you been claiming and nothing is happening reach out to him, and get your ex back, he does all kinds of spells. Check his last video and get his WhatsApp number. ua-cam.com/channels/FISUB9Vm5SuyhoEGrGuuUA.html 👆👆👆👆 on the video here
100%
As for No. 6, Doctor, I want to speak on behalf of the women (Not trying to be nice). I think its a man's duty to make his wife beautiful, by buying her good clothes. Yes, hygiene is a personal responsibility, but in a marriage, the two are one. As a husband, I must point out whats wrong in my wife. And if she can't correct it herself, I will do it for her. Walking out is the last option, when all options are exhausted.
Well said sir x
Correct...
You should like a very sweet and caring man x. I wish more men out there were like you
@@makedafindlay9398 Thankyou
My Compliments! Your wife is a lucky Woman.
Well I know that he was jobless for many years and didn't have a choice but let me support the family (including him). I didn't mind this and didn't point this out to him. I was patient but his ego couldn't take it finally he left (26 yrs). I didn't chase, didn't blame myself... As far as I know he continues to be jobless and is with another woman who supports him. I am glad to be free of all that idiocy and his laziness 👍🥂.
What could possibly be the problem that a man could not work FOR 26 YEARS!! A bit of a user I think! Good job he's not there now!
@@TheSharronW he had a job 4yrs in and out of the 26yrs. He said he was waiting for a better offer, what a con😏, he's 9yrs older I didn't know any better and tried to stick it out...
Put Jesus Christ the center of your marriage and nothing goes wrong ❤️🙏
Its all about men, let it go. Women have feelings too and they have to be felt
Not to mention women get blamed for everything!
Dr. You are right. It's the first time I have heard someone speaking the truth. True love can be saved if we change. Surely it should be from both sides. In marriage togetherness is important. 👍👍👍🙏
Yes, we are a team.
He said everything in very simple straight term! I love this!
You are right. We separated after 25 years at the age of 60. I really think there needs to be continued education for married people. We don't have the culture, family, community and village support any more. Our life is very lonely and we live in isolation. Plus our society is teaching women to become masculine which goes against flow of things. We have too much expectations from our partner. Also, there definitely needs to be mandatory education class requirement for people getting married. Most people have no idea what they are getting into.
tellll me (29 yrs in )
@@southsweetpies8118 Me too. Both 60, and she finally hit her mid life crisis, got tattooed, drinking, partying with her oh so wise divorced sister . She is the one who served me with divorce papers. When she first told me she wasnt happy 5 years ago, I should have run for the door. Nothing I did , counsoling, etc helped. Oh and no sex was a big issue too. claimed to be dry down there, but yet never did anything about ( supposedly) until she openly began screwing around, just recently. The divorce cant happen fast enough.
Ray you’re getting into a serious topic now: Feminism. It is destroying the fabric of our society.
@@joerivas9847
At 60…ha ha ..she is a joke ..it’s laughable ..just laugh at her my friend and move on ..nothing more ridiculous than an old granny ho…not a loss my friend …move on and chalk it down as experience
@@joerivas9847 (
1. Control
2. Sexless marriage
3. Extra marital affairs
4. Lack of appreciation
5. Empty nest
6. Wife neglecting herself
7. Endless conflicts
I don’t understand how and why a woman would ever fall in love and want get married from the jump. Women also gets trier of a man. Man think their really good in bed and their Not. Hell it’s man that also let them self go. Trust me it’s comforted that women stay in a marriage especially if he’s paying the bulk of the damn bills. I know a lot of women that are cheating on their husbands for more then 20 something years with different man. Women today have learned to NOT give a damn nor fuck about what their husband’s got going on.
@@shewanamiyienda6872 heartwarming
True
@@douglasparise3986 🤣
@@flinx649 this is why men die before their wives,because it is much better
Thank you Dr.Jacob for the video full of wisdom.I totally agree with you that..Men should take the leading role in a relationship and that's how a healthy family is built.Once a Wiseman said "Men build houses and women turn them into homes".
Hmm. I left my first husband. I got bored. My twenty-five year marriage to my soul mate: perfection. He loves an assertive woman. I have been very popular with men for years, and they love strong women. I do agree that a man needs to believe that he is free - NOT 'In control." As for sex: men are the ones with a short shelf life, not women. We can go forever. Men fizzle. If a woman stops being intimate it's because the man is boring in bed. Men need sex; so do women, so please don't assume. Never had any man cheat on me my whole life. Why? Because I know the secret of sex: each person must be willing to train each other overtly to do what turns us on. I agree that cheating is a total no-no. Cheating ruins any marriage. But men can't cheat, either. It annoys me that you are "preaching" to women. As for "lack of appreciation" - men stop appreciating their wives as well. Give me a break. When a man loves a woman, he lavishes her with love and appreciation. If you, a man, are not being appreciated, it's because you are not appreciatING your wife, OR: she doesn't love you. Divorce her asap. Appreciation from both sides is essential. Men: stop comparing your wife of several years with much-younger women. See?It goes both ways. LOVE HER FOR WHO SHE IS! Everything you say here goes for men, too. Today, most children don't actually leave home any more, lol. Children still in the home into their late twenties is a marriage-killer. Kick 'em out! Children are not "glue," by the way. When they grow up they are "adults." Sorry about this, but frankly, women do not like men preaching at them about keeping their men. P.S. As for being well-groomed and dressing well: PLEASE TELL OTHER MEN TO DO THIS FOR WOMEN! I have never seen so many shlumpy men as there are now. Big, fat bellies; ugly shorts and untucked shorts, down at the heels sneakers. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. How dare you? Are there any other women rolling their eyes here?
Yes i am.
Perfectly said 👏👌✌👍
Well said, here no need to attack women here it works both ways. Love must be true love not egos.
In all what you just said, just swap man for woman and see the results
No, You said it all. 😂😂😂 TY
I agree with everything you wrote here.
This is hilarious, but it is so close to home. There is always agape love. Remember, the marriage vows said, “for better or for worse”. And it is a vow before God. Have faith in the Good Lord.
Good for you Babs! The words spoken here by the good Dr. are true. No one want to walk away but to me a marriage is a partnership ordained by God between Man Woman and God. When there is a lack of understanding between the man and the woman, and a lack of the meeting of the minds, then it will not last. Children as beautiful as they are and May be, they do not come before the marriage and the partnership. Just my opinion. Marriage is real!
That's so true about men being in control. I'm a Christian and that's Biblical. After 25 years of marriage my ex didn't wanna be married anymore. That wasnt our problem. He was being emotionally abusive and I wouldn't take it anymore. I left for a little while and wanted him to stop, instead he wanted to be alone. We are friends now. It took years but God has healed my heart from the pain of divorce. I didn't want it. I didn't know how to be with a man who was turning ours kids against me. Everything is better now. ❤ Once you have children together I don't know how you can just totally stop loving your ex spouse. There's always love there, even if we were bad together.
Hi nice to meet you.
Hello Sorry About What Happened I am ACristian Too And Single I Live In Ohio
7 reasons why men leave their wives after many years of marriage
1) Control - women controlling the man and having a final say.
2) Sexlessness
3) Extra marital affairs - cheating
4) Lack of appreciation
5) Empty nest - the glue keeping them together is kids & once they leave they are empty
6) Wife neglecting herself
7) Endless conflicts
Understanding and accepting the true commitment of the sacrament of vow of marriage is all that matter to the adults who say YES to thier final decision with thier life journey.
You're doing a wonderful job indeed 👍...not only "ministering" to the married folks and their family relationships but more importantly, passionately drawing people to GOD, Who is The true Creator of the original "Marriage Institution" 💞 And you also encourage
them to seek His Grace and come to Faith in His Son Jesus, the only Saviour. HalleluYAH! 🙌 Praise the Lord! 👏Amen 😇
GOD BLESS you Dr. Jacob 👼
8:16 "Children are part of my family, not part of my marriage." 📚📖🧑🎓
We used to spend long weekends away alone together on our anniversary. At the end he started inviting our friends on our trips. He never asked me first. I would have said no. That time was to invest in our relationship.
I know with experience, that if we keep Jesus Christ at the centre of our marriage, going to him for all our solutions, our marriage relationship gets better, happier, exciting & Stronger. Praise Jesus!!
One word to you my Brother.... you're absolutely RIGHT on your presentation. You're RIGHT... there is no absolute Permanent in life....I learn this in my life. Great knowledgeable.❤️
Sqw
I been with my wife for 35years but you are so right my friend I'm glad someone is 👄 talking about this i like this guy
This just sounds like a beat down on women … We are ALL responsible for our own feelings … It’s not OUR job to spend time blowing smoke up you know where to help this individual feel SPECIAL …. It’s a two way street … Men leave marriages after many years when the life partner decides she can no longer tolerate the selfish …. self serving …. thoughtless behaviour …. she now realises how much she brings to the table and what her value is … So maybe you should give a talk about being a genuine … Loving … considerate …. Supportive partner who cares for his wife and children as much as he cares for himself …. Talk about …You give nothing you get nothing …
Talk about how her sacrifices have assisted him with security in his life and allowed HIM to live his dreams … To climb his ladder of success … Your little chat here makes out that ALL women have issues ,…. Women don’t withhold their love if they’re balanced in their views and are valued by their partners …. Men leave because women have had a gut full of their bs … These men who demean their wives then expect them to just take it are delusional … And clearly have NO idea about how relationships are suppose to work …
Change can only come about when the individual sees his / her issues and decides to address it themselves … You can’t try and change another it never works because without ownership of what needs to be addressed it becomes an external shift which never lasts … You can never make someone see something in themselves if they’re not ready or willing to see it for themselves …
I can't agree more. Daktaris arguement is so one sided and biased. It assumes that all men are angels and are all socialized the same way. It is unfortunate.
Great
It's a 2 way traffic
We deserve love as we love
Listened to as we listened
Protected as we protect
Honesty and genuineness applies
Cleanliness on both
Meekness on both
Lastly fear of God on both
@@ruthmahindu1150 Amen 🙏🏽 i strongly with u Yessss
Women often control men way beyond what any human being can handle due to how they have been taught or due to selfishness. Dr. Jacob was right spot on with the #1 issue of why men leave their marriage.
Girl I couldn't have said it better myself but right on it! 👏 This man sounds like a female bastard he probably doesn't have a woman in his life.
Here's 1 Reason. Stupidity. Instead of communicating and WORKING on there marriage they end it and look for another Woman to make them Happy. But they soon find out the problem wasn't their wives but Them.
And that is true
🎯🎯🎯🎯🎯
It also sounds like men are doing a favor to the women by staying in the marriage.
Women are very ignorant most times when it comes to such things. Especially when women are controlling the marriage for a long time.. they will never realize their defects in Marriage
Absolutely right and frankly speaking women don't need such men in their lives. The ladies are Absolutely better off without them.
Being male, I can see why you put forth the reasons for men leaving their wives. Many women leave their intolerable husbands too. For some of the same reasons.
After leaving, they try what is out there, they always regret and try to come back. He thought the grass was greener on the other side, I moved after the divorce, I accomplished more as a divorcé than whe I was married. It was a gift for him to leave.
1. Men hate being controlled
2. Sexlessness ❤️
3. Wife cheated
4. Lack of appreciation
5. Emptiness (Children leave)
6. Wife neglecting herself (Stops staying physically beautiful) ❤️ MEN ARE VISUAL.
7. Conflicts and arguments
8. Because they got a chance to cheat and they wanted to.
😅😅😅😅
My husband of forty eight years walk away and I am not guilty of none of the 7 were doing fine until we inherited a piece of land he told me that he doesn't love me anymore
@@louisesinclair4832 don’t listen to these people. Your husband was 🗑️
@@louisesinclair4832 I Will Date You When You Get Back On Your Feet
I have been married to my husband for almost 35 years and neither one of us ever cheated on the other! WE are partners 50/50 but we expect 30% from the other and GIVE 70%.
He has always treated me like a princess therefore I have always made sure that I looked, smelled, and acted like his princess!
I have always taken care of myself because he has always taken care of me!!
How did you make him give of himself so?
I try to give my hubby praise and general affection and complements.. and give him space. I’m careful not to nag. He only ignores me though. I don’t like to fight. I don’t know what to do better. I even lost 25 lbs. but he hardly seems to notice. I need better strategy
@@Oyuki-Mayonesa you dont need all that sis. Doesnt seem as though he's interested. Just pack
Omg he said men need sex…😒men need to learn how to please their wives first. That’s one reason why sex toys are in such demand. A lot of men just don’t know what to do periodtttttt!!!!
Like seriously, most of them are selfish, Anyway that's why they say communication is key
You as a woman have to teach them. They have no clew.
@@truffaut650truffaut6 who said they have no clew ..
They do is just that the come for it when they are in need and many of them have forgotten we also needed it
If not what else wouldn’t you get from you family
My hysband has pleased me twice sexually, and it wasn't with intercourse. Men have orgasims just looking at a woman, I have yet to have any physical pleasure, so it became, just get it over with and get off me!!!
I totally agree this is why we as a woman don’t want it. Togetherness passion and good energy connecting. A woman need it to. Give it to me right are nothing at all
The question isn't why men leave their wives but why they got married in the first place.
1' lack of real communication , 2' boredom , 3' loss of intimacy and emotional connection , 4'partner maybe controlling , 5' got involved way to young , 6' infidelity , 7' health issues
More comments: My husband and I were married for many years before he died. I did not look like I did when I was young, but neither did he. He said I was beautiful inside . He loved me and this is the difference between fickle men that are immature and good Christain men who really do love their wives and are faithful. No marriage is perfect , but love overrides those times, if there are those times. There are book published about why men cheat. They say because men go through mid life crisis. The men wants a change regardless of how ugly, beautiful or good their spouse is, they men want to change their jobs, their friends, their life style. How they handle this common problem with men varies. Women dont blame yourselves. Some men never matures. Period.
Every Man and Woman is different, so all these people with their individual assessments mean nothing.
Excellent common sense. Women don't blame themselves when they are doing their best. This is typical sexist BS. Blame it on e the innocent and the victim crap.
What An ugly blame machine. Yuk
Always blame men. Got it..
@@Zhahn-Pam The wife should serve her husband.
@@samsilverman824 I have been married to my husband for 21 years. We support one another. I am neither property nor any man's servant. Men will always leave either by the door or by dying. That's the reality. If my husband wants to leave, he knows where the door is. he has known where the door is since the days we got married. Just as I know where the door is. Equality not ownership. I am not his dog to be lead around on a leash, neither is he. We are equal and very strong. A woman should serve her husband? F** that BS.
I would say this also applies to wives
leaving their husbands as well.(That is
Life).
This is the best comment I read .. they always make it seems as if it’s only men that have reasons to break up with a woman, as if women don’t have reasons to break up with men too.. it’s such a one sided thing, I have noticed..
Ha!! Most of the videos are about the wives leaving. Shush and give men there glory for once.
@@nomadnomad8571
As,I said,”That is Life”.
That's another video....not this one.
@@johnspartan98
Have you seen the other video then.Tell us about it.We all want to know.
No they’re not.. I know many many Husbands/ Wives That still together till the end… They aren’t about these break up trends .. they don’t believe in Love they Believe in Loyalty !!!! they are in this world but not of it and that makes the bond Peaceful and enduring !!!! 32 years Baby !!!!
I've always known these things,but to hear someone like you put all this in a nutshell is great. Good job.
Thank you so much sir. So many marriages are in this very trouble, unfortunately majority of them end up not getting back
Very insightful. Just got married last year with the most wonderful man I met. I will always remind him of that. Thanks. I'll definitely subscribe. :)
Let God blessed ur heart and blessed ur marriage..only the smart ones will listen instead of arguing his points but don't take the lessons teaches here
Very enlightening video. I hope I don't stop being appreciative. 😊 Thank you Doc Jacob. Children are not part of the marriage relationship
1.control 2. Sexlessness 3. Extramarital affairs 4. Lack of appreciation 5. Empty nest 6. Wife neglecting herself 7. Endless conflicts
Yeah mostly all of them get as big as a house after they’re secure then don’t understand why their men look at more fit women.
👌
Thanks for the synopsis! I should've read the comments first 😀
Nagging women are the worst.
Check all seven for me. We divorced after 23 years. Now, we both are poor retirees but it was worth it.
The first two comments was enough for me! Equal respect for each other and if couples argue, give yourselves a "time out" to get your "shit" together. NO FISTS or SLAPS. 43 years strong. And please consider the children and grandchildren..........
much appreciation on your topic. I have just known your UA-cam channel today. I believe this will definitely change my life. Am texting from Malawi
Well done for this, quite educative, how about why women walk away out of marriage after a number years?
This guy tells it like it is. Thank you for no sugar coating.
To act and look perfect all the time for years. Best to stay single, then there are no broken hearts.
Men run us in the ground deplet all of our good energy by being childish irresponsible and inconsiderate. Most times they are looking for a mother they can sleep with.. then it’s our fault that they leave smh…. I’ll rather be alone who’s loving us women when we are giving everything to these men we have to provide everything for everyone in the relationship most time neglecting our own wants and needs to ensure everyone else is happy
@@selfmotivation5611 you are spot on!
Amen brother, ,,,you nailed the issues completely, I'm sending this to all my friends
Not to mention...
Men cheat because they can!
I agree 100%. Best marriage counseling I've heard in years!
This would apply for me as a wife not only for a husband I've been married nearly 30 years I could have leave my husband but I couldn't afford hurting my son feelings ,spot on all that reasons!! 🥺🥺Apply to my husband
Huh! When I was sick, none of the bills were paid on time! 32 years he never gave me a present for my birthday or anniversaries over $10!! He lied to everyone, including me about being a pharmacist and just not wanting to practice; he was never even enrolled in college!!! He never had any control over his home environment with his mom and dad and he often took that out on me!!! I think the marriage lasted so long because I made so many allowances for him including when he lied!!! I gave him the opportunity to tell the truth within a couple of hours with no repercussions!!! Men who say or think they want control don't know how run their own lives and purposely look for a woman who can take control!!!!! I was simply a scapegoat for all his problems!!!!!
Hi 👋
My husband proposed to me. We lived for 35 together. Then he leaves us. He never had enough money. He wanted sex all the time. He was weak, always put blame on me. He didn't direct the children the correct path. But blamed me for everything. His daughter threw him out if her home. His son wanted to hit him. But i still love him though we are separated. I am strong and happy staying alone. Working in USA . I cry why did it had to be me?
You said he never had enough money,,,, perhaps you made him feel worthless.
Are you sure you aren't a narcissist?
Why did it have to be you? because it was your choice!
I really enjoy listening to you!! You are spot on on relationships. I was married for 30 years, happily, so much love. No regrets!! Love, people!! Forget possessions & competing, just love & Love God!! You will have a good life maybe even spectacular. Love is God given.
I love it when men talk about marriage. I grew to love my husband by understanding men better through advice I got from male friends
I'm born to be celebrated not being tolerated that's my portion in Jesus name Amen 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 by Steve Irungu Jermaine
Wonderfull, These are mega words of wisdom, It looks like you are the Solomon of this time. Blessed is the woman who gave birth to you. And I really bless the Almighty through His grace who has blessed you with such kind of wisdom and so you bless us Too. Thanks so much Dr., I have learnt a lot from yr teachings. To have spoken in my life as you knew who I am
Wonderfully presented, still this may annoy opposite sex never mind let's look at postive's. Marriage and family is a balanced act, a devine relationship cannot be measured in terms of value. Love should be pure from either direction
Dr.K.N. Jacob , please do a video too on why women leave their husbands after many years together
I came across your videos just yesterday and I cannot stop watching. You are spot on with all the things you say . It’s very timely with what’s happening in my life at this present time. UA-cam’s very best real talk.
Wow awesome message Dr. K.N. Jacob, so vital information and first time watching your channel and I have to subscribe as I heard you sharing the first reason. God continued blessing on your ministry sir.
Wonderful observation on causes of failed marriages.
And of course there are those who say "to hell with this" and give up on the marriage, but remain as a roommate. The "marriage" dies and the relationship sort of morphs into something else. And the wife may remain essentially clueless.
Men don't just leave, they were never there, men don't just leave, they left a long time ago in the relationship & marriage. It is too much out there for a man to stay true & real. I know this, I sit among college students daily & these young ladies & men are all in competition with one another. The young ladies are now acting like men, they say I saw my mom go through with my father I'm not going through that & a lot of young men are going both ways they don't care anymore
I’ve been married for 53 yrs and we are closer than ever. We are equals. Men do not have control over their wives!!!
Do you crack the whip and he jumps?
So basically pander to all the Narcissistic tendencies in your male partner and you should be ok. Except you will be a shell of a person. Find a man who truly loves you and you may actually communicate. Love respect and communication that’s the key
Yep
Yes my lord.
Thank you Dr. K N Jocob this is so encouraging may The Heavenly Father continue blessings be with you and all of us who so need this in our marriage.
This was excellent. I recommend this and have subscribed! Many thanks.
And please remember to subscribe to my UA-cam Channel to access over 890 inspirational videos free of charge.
Here’s the link…
ua-cam.com/users/DrKNJacob
It's about the two parties not really men or women,it's vise vasa,it all needs love courage, commitment trust and wisdom application for women and knowledge for men (biblical),to sustain marriage.Thanks,I'm EVANZ here in Bungoma West Hospital KENYA.