I'm Dating A Boomer Again

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  • Опубліковано 6 вер 2024
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 848

  • @Chowdeen
    @Chowdeen 3 місяці тому +306

    When describing your new partner not once did you mention your physical attraction or connecting you have. You just mentioned alot of ways he takes care of you. My therapist said to me once; “Are you looking for a relationship or are you looking for a parent?”

    • @helenaeliana5670
      @helenaeliana5670 3 місяці тому +68

      I actually think she is looking for a parent to be honest.

    • @TooCaro4U
      @TooCaro4U 3 місяці тому +19

      Did we watch the same video? Did you not see her beaming when talking about enjoying music together and going out and having fun together? And how they both raise each other up? She has already told us in the past how supportive and emotionally available he is. Did finding out how old he was change how you view him? I'll be honest, when she first mentioned him I imagined someone in their 30s or 40s and that seemed really healthy. When she said he was older, I worried. But then seeing how full of life and love Julia is when talking about him changed my mind.

    • @karleensage5613
      @karleensage5613 3 місяці тому +13

      She was full of life with Eileen. What happened there? New relationships come with excitement, with in 4 months the work begins to
      Maintain it. Yes, Julia is looking for someone to occupied her time. Elileen never did. Good luck to her.

    • @ninamunsch
      @ninamunsch 3 місяці тому +7

      @@TooCaro4U to be honest just liking the same music or football club and having similar routines isn’t that deep of a connection… I was surprised that she would mention these as evidence of their connection and not something deeper

    • @Zarzarrb
      @Zarzarrb 3 місяці тому

      Not everyone needs physical attraction, I don't. It's all about the mind. I see happy Julia, who's suffered for a fews.

  • @bryntu9m
    @bryntu9m 3 місяці тому +364

    I don’t care who you date. But you should have been single for a minute and worked on you and your mental health.
    You were with this person while you were still in a relationship with your ex-wife, you were open.
    Take care of you!

    • @KAIJUKING123
      @KAIJUKING123 2 місяці тому +3

      That’s what I’m saying

    • @jaizenkingtaurean3543
      @jaizenkingtaurean3543 2 місяці тому +1

      Who cares, her life

    • @bryntu9m
      @bryntu9m 2 місяці тому +3

      @@jaizenkingtaurean3543 OBVIOUSLY it’s her life and OBVIOUSLY she will do what she wants BUT this is a comment section and we’re free to leave our opinions. Of course she will do what she wants but a little advice doesn’t hurt anyone.
      And if advice/comments hurt Julia then she would turn comments off.
      And who cares, well….probably the 300+ people who agreed

  • @rainbowkiss100
    @rainbowkiss100 3 місяці тому +630

    Just some advice and it is with kindness- this is your first time dating men. Older men have their own baggage and different life views and are set in their own ways and there will always be an uneven relationship dynamic. Women can be toxic etc but men are a different game.

    • @starxvssv
      @starxvssv 3 місяці тому +24

      Exactly lol

    • @ravynwoods5902
      @ravynwoods5902 3 місяці тому +15

      We haven’t even met him yet.

    • @starxvssv
      @starxvssv 3 місяці тому +25

      @@ravynwoods5902 so?

    • @erinnnorris3989
      @erinnnorris3989 3 місяці тому +9

      Not always. Sometimes, they actually have worked through their own shit. It is very refreshing.

    • @leli4700
      @leli4700 3 місяці тому +42

      In long term older men are usually difficult and want their own way too much. Hope she will be more lucky and have it easier. But most older men seek a younger woman to tell her what to do. Hope it's not the case for her. Hope he can listen to her and her needs.

  • @MollyPrewittWeasley
    @MollyPrewittWeasley 3 місяці тому +1439

    I think it would be healthier for you to be single and take time to heal.

    • @mayfairlady_
      @mayfairlady_ 3 місяці тому +91

      a healthier option is to not give unsolicited advice ✨ thanks Ej chick who took the time to correct my spelling mistake, instead of the actual point ✨ brain dead

    • @zoooejenkins
      @zoooejenkins 3 місяці тому +59

      We cannot always heal in isolation. Especially when it comes to interpersonal / intimacy issues.

    • @sunshinesideofdarkside
      @sunshinesideofdarkside 3 місяці тому +25

      I understand what you mean but remember when she uploads is not on the same timeline as she is, this could be from a few months ago. Who knows? Everyone heals at a different pace. Sorry the other commenters started in on you like that. I think they should take their own advice and think about what you may have meant and ask clarifying questions instead of immediately attacking you, as I think your comment comes from a place of concern.

    • @pinpantrukutruku
      @pinpantrukutruku 3 місяці тому +75

      yeah.. she jumps from relationship to relationship to relationship.....

    • @pinpantrukutruku
      @pinpantrukutruku 3 місяці тому +16

      @@zoooejenkins thats true, but some time alone is needed too

  • @EmileeBreeana19
    @EmileeBreeana19 3 місяці тому +138

    You just got divorced. Be alone for a while. You need time to heal. Also keep in mind, you were sooooo in love with Eileen and thought she was your soulmate at first too. It’s called the honeymoon phase for a reason

  • @despairaid9361
    @despairaid9361 3 місяці тому +87

    Girl u need a break old men r not a good rebound 😭😭

  • @heavenleighdollanger
    @heavenleighdollanger 3 місяці тому +105

    Babyyyyy plz take time for yourself…… you don’t need a man or a women you only need YOU!!! And the pets

  • @glorias.2930
    @glorias.2930 3 місяці тому +496

    You need to take a break from dating, seriously.

    • @Poseidonblue123
      @Poseidonblue123 3 місяці тому +53

      She can’t be alone, I think that’s a fact that’s given

    • @louwinters508
      @louwinters508 3 місяці тому +11

      She doesn't want to. No point in telling her that.
      At least this time she's not tied down financially.

    • @starchannel123
      @starchannel123 3 місяці тому +17

      She needs to go to therapy

    • @Poseidonblue123
      @Poseidonblue123 3 місяці тому +6

      @@starchannel123 yeah deal with her issues

    • @Pixieshandcrafteddesigns
      @Pixieshandcrafteddesigns 3 місяці тому +4

      @@starchannel123she said she goes to therapy.

  • @smileys462
    @smileys462 3 місяці тому +180

    I watched the "coming out again" video and I didn't want to say anything but it concerned me. NOT because Julia is with a man, or in another age gap relationship, but according to what was shared (if it's the same guy), this male friend knew she identified as a lesbian, knew she was going through marital problems, probably knew she experimented with substances to deal with the marital problems, knew her mental health was bad, *had* to know she was emotionally distraught and vulnerable....and got with her anyway. That doesn't sound like a friend, but a patient manipulator who has been waiting in the wings for the proper moment. I HOPE I'm wrong and I absolutely hate saying this because Julia gets so much hatred online and judgment too but I'm not judging her at all. I had something similar happen when a family member passed away and this guy I'd been acquainted with for around 5 years suddenly started paying extra attention to me and I thought it was all coincidence and sympathy but then I learned later he goes to funerals to pick up girls. What's worse is I'm not straight either and wasn't attracted to him *at all* and I told him that but he love bombed me into *acting* like a gf and used positive reinforcement to train me to behave how he wanted. I can't help but draw parallels. Although that's no dig at her bisexuality!!!!!!
    Again this isn't about the age gap- my manipulator and I were in our 20s. And I *really* hope she is actually with a kind person who genuinely wants to help and support her.

    • @oofihavenousernameideas2451
      @oofihavenousernameideas2451 3 місяці тому +26

      This 100%

    • @ninamunsch
      @ninamunsch 3 місяці тому +3

      What do you mean experimented with substances? Did she say thisv

    • @smileys462
      @smileys462 3 місяці тому +15

      @@ninamunsch in other videos she has mentioned it. No judgement tho people will do lots of things when going through a hard time.

    • @despairaid9361
      @despairaid9361 3 місяці тому +12

      This omg I rlly hope she reads this and thinks it trough all my alarm bells were ringing

    • @Longshot678
      @Longshot678 3 місяці тому +16

      Exactly. She falls for the love bombing every time. So nieve.

  • @Samilord755
    @Samilord755 3 місяці тому +80

    Julia I love you. But you need to heal and grieve your past marriage instead of jumping into a rebound relationship. You're literally repeating the same pattern of when you left Maria. Jeez I'm sorry someone needed to say it

    • @judithmoore1545
      @judithmoore1545 3 місяці тому +12

      It bears being noted. You are correct in seeing the same pattern as when she was with Maria. Literally hopped from a video with Maria to a “I have a new girlfriend” video and “Moving in with my new girlfriend.” Another person posted that everything feels like content opportunities. I agree. So in the meantime while it matters to no one I will now yawn from predictable boredom and exit this channel.

    • @Lennox2638
      @Lennox2638 3 місяці тому

      I basically DID say it lol

    • @jennijada6730
      @jennijada6730 3 місяці тому +1

      I totally agree with this comment

    • @DorisStyles
      @DorisStyles 2 місяці тому

      She probably moved on when she was still in the marriage (it happend to me too)

  • @trishxo
    @trishxo 3 місяці тому +57

    I know you need content but for the sake of your own emotional and mental health and the health of your relationship, I can’t understand why you wouldn’t keep this relationship offline

  • @michgonz314
    @michgonz314 3 місяці тому +92

    Is the relationship with him still open? Or youre just dating exclusively now? Do you live together already? What are your future plans? How long have you been together?

    • @Cody_Skye
      @Cody_Skye 3 місяці тому +4

      They've been together over a year, and yeah she lives with him. I doubt they're open, he claims to be very much in love with Julia. 🙄

    • @beanj580
      @beanj580 2 місяці тому

      Where are the animals julia claims to love so much?

  • @bobachii
    @bobachii 3 місяці тому +76

    Damn, you got a rebound problem. Get your own shit together and then get in a relationship. This is your chance.

  • @lisamandeville5111
    @lisamandeville5111 3 місяці тому +150

    Just something for you to know, age gap lesbian relationships can work. We have been together for 28 years with a 24 year gap. Today I'm 60 and she is 83. We now live full time in a van and travel the United States all summer, then we winter in Florida. What has happened is just a learning experience for your future.

    • @Nikkif1013
      @Nikkif1013 3 місяці тому +5

      My husband is 63 I’m 38. 25 year age gap here and we have been together almost 15 years.
      People love judging when they haven’t been in an age gap relationship. I was married before to someone a year younger than me but he was so immature. As I grew more mature it seemed he got more immature. Within 5 years and after one child I was divorced from it, best decision ever.

    • @Colourfullauriecake
      @Colourfullauriecake 3 місяці тому +3

      That's real cool! I hope to be living to my fullest with the one I love well into my wise years as well. We should all be so lucky 💜

    • @irrittt
      @irrittt 3 місяці тому +3

      Aw your story is so cute! 🥰 sounds like a rly beautiful love story 💘💘

    • @shaebellabella
      @shaebellabella 3 місяці тому

      I would love to follow you and your partner’s travel journeys if you share!

    • @corinatralala2556
      @corinatralala2556 3 місяці тому +1

      My husband and I have a 21 year old age gap and we have been together for 10 years (married for 6)❤

  • @karleensage5613
    @karleensage5613 3 місяці тому +39

    Julia, Spend time with your shadow. Finding someone to fill a void in your life will always become problematic. Maturity is finding and knowing who you’re. Honey, you’re still confused. Bless your heart.

  • @user-ol7yf8hl7f
    @user-ol7yf8hl7f 3 місяці тому +128

    I had a friend who used to be attracted to mainly older men, until I realized she was being taken advantage of. I asked her why she found older men attractive, and she couldn’t answer. Finally she said that, since she had daddy issues, she never felt fatherly love from partners her own age. She just couldn’t. Since then she has benefited tremendously from therapy. Julia we love you but I can’t help but feel there’s some trauma tied to this. Please be safe

    • @ashleyjasmine300
      @ashleyjasmine300 3 місяці тому +14

      I completely understand what you’re saying but this isn’t true for everyone. I am in an age gap relationship with a man and there is no problem.
      I do not have “daddy issues”
      I’ve always been attracted to older men and just don’t tend to get along with people my age very well.
      I’ve been in this relationship for over 6 years and it is the healthiest relationship I’ve ever had.

    • @user-ol7yf8hl7f
      @user-ol7yf8hl7f 3 місяці тому +4

      @@ashleyjasmine300I definitely agree it’s not a problem for everyone and am happy for your long term relationship. It’s just concerning seeing Julia jump from relationship to relationship so quickly. Especially when she just got taken advantage of too. She has spoke of her past traumas so it’s just kind of sad to see 😞 I seriously pray she is okay

    • @Nikkif1013
      @Nikkif1013 3 місяці тому +1

      Your friend probably was tired of dealing with immature men her age. Women mature faster than men do. I don’t believe your friend told you she wants a father figure. You’re definitely making 💩 up.

  • @moondust9970
    @moondust9970 3 місяці тому +72

    I don't think the "unhealthy" pattern you mention is the age gap. It's the fact that once again, you will sacrifice your relationship for the modest price of views, easy content and your mental health. Your new partner truly seems great from what you tell us. Are really willing to risk him for a like from anonymous123 ?

    • @katydonna6015
      @katydonna6015 3 місяці тому +9

      UA-cam is her job. She shares her life on here. Her last relationship, nor the one before, broke down because of her sharing their life publically.

    • @ninamunsch
      @ninamunsch 3 місяці тому +4

      If a relationship can be “sacrificed” just from showing it to people, it’s not very strong then is it….

    • @moondust9970
      @moondust9970 3 місяці тому +3

      @@ninamunsch It must be nice to see the internet in rose tinted glasses... But the strongest person, the strongest relationship can be affected by "people's" (trolls and bored strangers on the other side of the planet) opinions and judgements. I just hope this relationship will be strong enough. Time will tell, I guess.

  • @ninamunsch
    @ninamunsch 3 місяці тому +12

    Another interpretation from what you described in your childhood could be that, since you had only your mother and she was a best friend to you, perhaps in some ways you were lacking a real parental figure. Therefore now you would be looking for a partner to fill in that role, as we are all programmed to look for partners that replace our parents (unless a lot of therapy and deconditioning took place). Obviously I can’t make assumptions from such little information but that could be a possible interpretation also. In which case there would still be nothing wrong and nothing to judge, and you’re absolutely right in that the responsibility lies with the parents and never the child

  • @taylorfrink1182
    @taylorfrink1182 3 місяці тому +25

    you've already gotten a lot of comments reiterating this, but girly just be careful, it can be super easy to miss red flags when you jump in quick to a new relationship after leaving a different, very toxic one (in part because you get in a habit of thinking, well since they aren't acting exactly like my ex, this must be fine/acceptable/normal/etc when sometimes it's still very much a red flag just a different shade of red). just stay aware and protect your emotions and mental health Julia xx wish you the best!

  • @Lady13Paranoid
    @Lady13Paranoid 3 місяці тому +66

    A question, how did you meet?

  • @ai2549
    @ai2549 3 місяці тому +11

    There will always be an unhealthy power imbalance, and I say this WHILE being in an age gap relationshp, me being 15 years older than my partner. The Power imbalance is SO obvious to me, the thing that matters is whether the older person chooses to exploit it or not. Denying the power imbalance will not make the relationshp healthy.

  • @admalma
    @admalma 3 місяці тому +24

    I'm getting flashbacks. No one can stop you from repeating the same problematic cycle, but at least keep your relationship offline. You can try to ignore this type of comments, but if you do a video with him, people won't be as supportive as the last time. I don't think you can take the scrutiny and criticism coming your way, the views are not worth it.

  • @laurakafi7201
    @laurakafi7201 3 місяці тому +22

    Enjoy your life, but definitely establish your own home so you have your sovereignty. Enjoy being hosted by him in his home and enjoy inviting him to your home. Have your own place.

    • @marieconner565
      @marieconner565 3 місяці тому +3

      A decent piece of advice advice right here :)

  • @GothToad
    @GothToad 3 місяці тому +42

    I don't care about the age of your partner, all I care about is them making you happy! Just make sure you're safe and happy and secure in any relationships you're in and we will all support you! (most of us, the nice ones, you have a loving and supportive community, just remember that!)

  • @Emma20248
    @Emma20248 3 місяці тому +99

    As a bisexual woman I can definitely relate!💜 Also, when I was in a relationship with a woman I was so much more comfortable in my queerness. Now being in a relationship with a (cishet) man I often feel like I don't belong in the queer space anymore and it makes me sad sometimes. It is so strange to suddenly be perceived as straight, and even though that is a privilege and it definitely has its pro's, I don't want to be perceived as someone I'm not.

    • @Notmyr3alname
      @Notmyr3alname 3 місяці тому +5

      I really relate too!

    • @Nobodysbby
      @Nobodysbby 3 місяці тому

      Why wouldn't you belong on a queer space if you dating a man if your bisexual. Who are you so worried is "perceiving" you to be straight ? & Your in a relationship so why are you worried if a another man or a women knows a) what's between your legs or b) who you would take home at night ? . You sexual identity or sexuality should NOT define how other perceived you. If other LGBT people are judging you it maybe seems like a problem with the community ? I mean should children and adults all walk around with gay lesbian or straight tags on our bodies ? How about you go where you feel safe and appreciated and that can be in all kind of places.

    • @Nobodysbby
      @Nobodysbby 3 місяці тому

      Your insulting I feel like a whole generation of gay people and I don't think y'all even realize you are doing it. For you to say to actual gay people who have struggled that there are pros to being straight and more privileged that seems like something white supremacists would say how dare you say straight white people are superior. Im so sick of hearing it. You guys are the only ones thinking like this . How many straight and white people have suffered for you to realize you sound like a dictator. Straight white people have tons of their own struggles too navigating life if gay man and woman in the past generation could do it, ride above the bs & lead normal lives (like miss Julia is so successful doing. ) than so can this generation.

    • @Jess-Rabbit
      @Jess-Rabbit 3 місяці тому +6

      Absolutely 💯 I am the same and just wrote a similar comment. I know its ridiculous but I can't stand when people assume my sexuality. Just because I'm with a man doesn't mean I'm straight. I know logically why people would think that but it really bothers me

    • @em-tt1qg
      @em-tt1qg 3 місяці тому +1

      Ugh, I feel this one in my core.

  • @minamonday69
    @minamonday69 3 місяці тому +63

    What a trainwreck

  • @angelav4568
    @angelav4568 3 місяці тому +17

    You seriously need to be single. You're putting yourself through the same thing over and over again. If you can't be comfortable with just yourself, you're not going to have a successful relationship. I highly recommend you start therapy and focus only on yourself. There is a reason you keep seeking out relationships and can't be alone. It isn't healthy and your mental health is crucial to a happy and healthy relationship in the future.

  • @bd1043
    @bd1043 3 місяці тому +83

    Hm i dont think my issue with age gap relationships is that they're "different from the norm", because theyre not really that different from the norm tbh. In my opinion, people with huge age gaps generally are in different stages of life and have had experiences that make these relationships difficult. A person who is well over 50 has had WAY more experiences that someone in their 20s. I think this *can* lead to power dynamic issues, possible manipulation, and for the younger person to receive ideas built up by the older individual. My parents had a 40 year age gap, and it's certainly not something i'd ever want for myself.

    • @rebekahcreates
      @rebekahcreates 3 місяці тому +1

      +

    • @leli4700
      @leli4700 3 місяці тому

      Yes, older men often manipulate and force a younger person to something. Hope it won't be her case.

  • @starchannel123
    @starchannel123 3 місяці тому +17

    A healthy person dates the best person. Younger people can be mature. Old people can be immature and closed minded. Anyone who strictly sticks to a certain type tends to have issues that they need to unpack. I feel bad for people that are not open to the beautiful diversity of the world.

  • @Lennox2638
    @Lennox2638 3 місяці тому +12

    Julia.. as someone that cares about you, you should give yourself some time.. don’t jump into any relationship right away because more often than not, it’s a “rebound relationship” .. I know because at one time I was with someone and we ended up breaking up.. so a friend of mine introduced me to someone new .. we ended up getting together.. we have since broken up but in hindsight I’ve realized that I never should have been with the new person because it was just a rebound. Ultimately though, you’ll do what you want but PLEASE be cautious and remember everyone is all sh!ts and giggles at first. Then the mask comes off.

  • @itamarp3314
    @itamarp3314 3 місяці тому +16

    Flashbacks… the way she talks about him… anyway… good luck girl!

  • @jannetteg
    @jannetteg 3 місяці тому +9

    I'm sapiosexual, which means I'm attracted to intelligence, and I believe that comes with age... so I also tend to find older individuals attractive.

  • @violetwaterford9381
    @violetwaterford9381 3 місяці тому +31

    You may be addicted to "being in love" the rush when you first start a sexual relationship with someone new. Once the relationship gets old, you go into the depression and unsettled moods. The reason I say this is a pattern is seen in your videos and you have hooked onto a new relationship and not even legally divorced yet excited to start a new one with no serious thoughts when your still married. I don't think the age gap is the real issue, but you need to be in a love rush of starting new relationships with new partners like a drug addiction to get that HIGH to combat your personal depression issues.

    • @curlwhurl8054
      @curlwhurl8054 3 місяці тому +7

      I absolutely agree. I think she suffers with serious limerance. Love bombs like crazy in the beginning and then gets bored and jumps to something new instantly. There's no way she would have left Eileen if there was nobody to jump to.

    • @mercyfulvickv2810
      @mercyfulvickv2810 2 місяці тому +1

      Spot on

  • @hiramapontejr.1992
    @hiramapontejr.1992 3 місяці тому +48

    take time, dont rush

  • @CarolinaVasquezEnglish
    @CarolinaVasquezEnglish 3 місяці тому +18

    I think you are a beautiful young girl who has so much ahead of her. I think you're attracted to older people because you have unresolved emotional baggage,abandonment issues that you have not resolved and worked through.
    Take it from someone who was also raised without a father and was always looking for an older male to protect me and provide emotional support on a level that a father was supposed to. Only years later after counseling I realized that and have been working through it.
    I don't want to sound like I am judging you, but my humble opinion for you is to take your mental health as a priority.
    You just finished a long term relationship with a person who was much older..you were hurt, crying on camera for your pain 😢 and all of us sympathized with you, and jumping into another one with a person who also is an elder might not be the smartest or wisest decision. Dont you think ?
    I'm talking to you as if you were my sister and coming from a caring place. Take time alone, heal your wounds, learn to love yourself without the validation of another person, in this case a father figure. That way, the next person who comes around will get the best version of you. And you will also be able to pick a better partner from a healed placed. ❤ wish you all the best.

  • @lavaghoul
    @lavaghoul 3 місяці тому +22

    We aren’t surprised

  • @helloitsme9604
    @helloitsme9604 3 місяці тому +36

    You look absolutely stunning Julia!! Your hair color + that top & the hair clips is just 🔥🔥!!

    • @ingridonthemoon3783
      @ingridonthemoon3783 3 місяці тому +1

      Exactly my thoughts as soon as I played the video 😍👌🏻

  • @cassiebravevlogs1868
    @cassiebravevlogs1868 3 місяці тому +178

    IT WAS SUPPOSE TO BE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • @JuliaZelg
      @JuliaZelg  3 місяці тому +61

      Omg love this comment 😅💕

    • @thenursenanaofficial
      @thenursenanaofficial 3 місяці тому +8

      That's what I was thinking thought, too! 😭

    • @user-te7zk5qq5p
      @user-te7zk5qq5p 3 місяці тому +8

      ❤😊 There are lucky many lovely queer weman in this world. The flower field is full of pretty flowers. You will find your person and I wish you love! 💕 😊 Your future wife is out there go to find her.

    • @amandag.1453
      @amandag.1453 3 місяці тому +3

      @@thenursenanaofficialdu bist doch immer bei Jane im ASMR Chat , UA-cam ist klein 🙈😂😂

    • @rebeccabaldwin9594
      @rebeccabaldwin9594 3 місяці тому +3

      Nope meeeeee! 😅

  • @Elizabeth76335
    @Elizabeth76335 3 місяці тому +184

    Waiting for the cover 'i kissed a Boomer and I liked it' by Julia Zelg 😅

  • @ashb1212
    @ashb1212 3 місяці тому +16

    Your channel is amazing to watch. You said once you felt like you overshared and I don't agree. Watching your videos is like watching a journey. That's what life is our perspectives of people change we fall in and out of love, we have ups and downs, good days and bad. The wonderful thing about the internet is that we can experience the different styles of life and people. Sadly, there are those who can't just keep their negativity to themselves. Life your best life girl and you do you. I am bisexual myself and my brother is gay and is married to a man and he called me "greedy" and I got called that by my mum at first too and I remember getting mad like why are bi people called this yet many people have polyamorous relationships and most of the time nobody has an issue because it involves straight people. Just because I like both men and women does not make me a sex maniac.

  • @Longshot678
    @Longshot678 3 місяці тому +5

    The reason people are saying the reason your marriage broke down was the age difference is because for someone THAT much older to desire a relationship with someone young enough to be their grandaughter, that there is *usually* something intrinsically wrong with that person. They likely want someone they can have a lot of infuence over, and they themselves are likely *extremely* emotionally stunted; eileen being a perfect example of this.
    In my opinion, you continue to seek these relationships as a protective measure against actual intimacy, because relationships with these types of older people can never last. and even if they do, you'll outlive them by a longshot. The relationship will be over by the time you're 40 no matter what.
    I really feel that this is a toxic relationship pattern that you continue to repeat because you subconsciously feel that being with people your age is too high stakes, too "real". You're scared of having an equal partner. You choose people who are not only mostly intrinsically stunted & dysfunctional, but who you know you will vastly outlive.
    Just my two cents.

  • @heathermirabal1
    @heathermirabal1 3 місяці тому +46

    It’s not the age gap, it’s getting into another relationship so quickly

  • @cherylbrown2357
    @cherylbrown2357 3 місяці тому +12

    I really hate to be a Debbie Downer but .....although I am very happy for you ..this is a new relationship and you are still in the Honey moon phase when everything is new and great ...it's always great at the beginning ...let's see if things are still the same 6 months or a year from now ...I'm just being realistic here ,.I hope you have found your person but it's all still very new ....if it's still this great and exciting a year from now then you will know this is the person for you !!! Either way I hope it works out and I'm happy for you!!!

  • @user-dp4sx7xs1v
    @user-dp4sx7xs1v 3 місяці тому +7

    Isn't it too soon to move on? Just asking??

    • @TimeMovie93150
      @TimeMovie93150 3 місяці тому

      people in toxic relationships (or even healthy ones!) are usually over it way before the relationship ends, so no. speaking from experience

  • @lanaborodina1499
    @lanaborodina1499 3 місяці тому +42

    Boomer dudes (specifically dudes) can be unbearably patriarchal and sexist - this is their "factory setting", even though some of them claim to be pro-feminists and pro-everything blah-blah. I could feel it with my ex, who was 14 years older. And I am an X-er (born right in the middle of 1970s), I can imagine how this could feel to a millennial.

    • @marieconner565
      @marieconner565 3 місяці тому

      Key phrase..."can be" not 'are', there are exceptions to most rules, if you think about it .

    • @lanaborodina1499
      @lanaborodina1499 3 місяці тому

      @@marieconner565 Oh yeah, and we all hope that the exception is exactly our case, until we learn it is not, otherwise where the statistics comes from.

    • @carebear8655
      @carebear8655 3 місяці тому +2

      She’s not even a millennial. She’s a zillennial *sorry, I have to be that person* 🤣

    • @janin.2331
      @janin.2331 3 місяці тому

      ​​​@@carebear8655She was born in 1994 and is a Millennial in almost every existing definition out there, she is just a younger Millennial. Zillennials are just a combination of the youngest Millennials and oldest Gen Z by the way. I'm Zillennial as well (born in 1995) but also considered Millennial in many definitions.

    • @carebear8655
      @carebear8655 3 місяці тому

      @@janin.2331 Well, it’s silly. What does someone born in 94 have in common with a person born in 1980? My mother was born in the early 60s, and it’s as clear as day her upbringing was much more similar to someone from “Gen X”. I was born in 1995 and barely relate to Millennial memes. The west loves their labels and boxes.

  • @poeppiesnoeppie
    @poeppiesnoeppie 3 місяці тому +13

    It will never work sorry ❤

  • @PotatoCouch666
    @PotatoCouch666 Місяць тому +4

    dude. be alone for a while instead of drowning yourself in another relationship to mask everything.

  • @ciciisims
    @ciciisims 3 місяці тому +31

    Julia I’ve been watching you for YEARS and I’ve NEVER seen you so happy and smile so much when talking about someone or something!! You’re absolutely radiant and I am SO EXCITED to meet him!!!

  • @tinahatfield8077
    @tinahatfield8077 3 місяці тому +5

    I have reservations about this relationship you are speaking of. I would feel better for you had you waited maybe a year after breaking it off with Eileen. It feels like you’ve jumped from the fire into the frying pan. Eventually, you’ll get burned again. This “new person” is only new to us as you have had him in your life while still with Eileen. You have had no time alone to adjust & really work on yourself. I care about you, Julia. I have respect for you. I feel you are so young & just need some serious time to date around & enjoy your freedom before getting into a relationship. I also wonder if you being with a man now has anything to do with your desire for a baby?

  • @carlalsss
    @carlalsss 3 місяці тому +9

    Some people in the comments forgetting that Julia is a grown up woman

    • @Poseidonblue123
      @Poseidonblue123 3 місяці тому +8

      She is. The fact is that she is 18+ , but her way of dealing with her problems is not mature.

    • @kittybelly
      @kittybelly 2 місяці тому +3

      Crazy. Because she keeps calling herself mature but is the maturity in the room with us?

  • @aracnofiliaaa
    @aracnofiliaaa 3 місяці тому +7

    i really really hope this is not love bombing because it sounds like it. We care for you Julia, just be careful

  • @sarahchurchill3184
    @sarahchurchill3184 3 місяці тому +67

    date whoever makes you happy. you don’t have to justify anything. you look so much happier already and i love it!

  • @mayragarcia9367
    @mayragarcia9367 3 місяці тому +8

    you did homegirl dirty dirty.

  • @namenamee5061
    @namenamee5061 3 місяці тому +6

    The nicokadoavocadoification of Julia zelg.

  • @velkata94
    @velkata94 3 місяці тому +7

    you explain that you have found a soul mate. But mate does not always mean loving in the sense of the word passion, romance, irrepressible attraction. In most cases, a soulmate is a friend, a very close friend, you feel like a real family. This does not mean, however, that you will not seek after time, without even realizing it, the real burning attraction of passion, which is stronger than reason

    • @curlwhurl8054
      @curlwhurl8054 3 місяці тому +11

      She also called Eileen her soul mate when she first introduced her....

  • @annamarchi4600
    @annamarchi4600 3 місяці тому +10

    babyy just be alone for a whilee

  • @Tishmazza
    @Tishmazza 3 місяці тому +4

    You don’t have problem to date older people or being attacked to older people, but do you have problem or are you not happy about ageing? (If you tend to worry too much about ageing) Because that’s a pattern right there. It’s a condition called Gerascophia. Those people (apart from others symptoms) prefer to have way older partners.

  • @Jess-Rabbit
    @Jess-Rabbit 3 місяці тому +22

    As a bisexual woman who is married to a man I basically can't tell anyone I'm bisexual unless I know they are also LGBTQ and have less of a chance of judging me. When I was younger people used to ask me "how do you know you're bi if you've never had sex with a girl". Hmm maybe the same way you know you're straight when you're a kid, duh. Why is it suddenly different if you're a woman who likes two genders? I definitely feel like I'm not allowed to call myself bi because I'm married to a man and that's frustrating. People act like your sexuality just disappears depending on who you're with. I'm not straight just because I'm in a hetero relationship

    • @cam410
      @cam410 3 місяці тому +3

      That's right. I'm bisexual too and I had only one girlfriend. Now im with s cishet man and we live together. People think "it was a phase" and it wasn't. It's so frustrating sometimes, but the important thing is you know who you are and that's enough ❤

    • @amazonionavalon8252
      @amazonionavalon8252 3 місяці тому +1

      I usually describe myself as Bisexual but tend to have long-term relationships with men. Not that we need to justify our desires or use labels though! ❤

    • @polina400
      @polina400 3 місяці тому +1

      This is so sad, I get this too. Like, it doesn’t make sense. Why do they think I need to have sex with woman to know I’m bi? It’s about feeling the attraction…

    • @itsanditimevarietyshow
      @itsanditimevarietyshow 3 місяці тому +1

      I have no issues with bisexuals. But I do think it's odd to call yourself bi if you've never taken the plunge. LOL

    • @ainhoasr6577
      @ainhoasr6577 3 місяці тому

      ​@@itsanditimevarietyshowbastante estúpida tu respuesta...

  • @daniellebuie8098
    @daniellebuie8098 3 місяці тому +4

    Happy for you, Julia! I came out as bi in the 90s, and I totally relate to what you're saying... frequent distrust from the lesbian community and frequent assumption of promiscuous intentions from straight folx. And also bi erasure since I've been married to a woman. Also she's 16 years my senior and we have 99 problems 😂 but literally none of them have anything to do with the age difference. Sometimes i worry about her dying a lot sooner than me, but honestly I could go before her. Life doesn't play by predictable rules, that's for sure. Happened exactly that way for my godfather, who lost his much younger partner to cancer. In any case... Wishing you all the best! ❤

  • @clefairy2260
    @clefairy2260 3 місяці тому +9

    why do you keep doing the same thing 😭

  • @becky5212
    @becky5212 3 місяці тому +15

    I’m so confused! You were previously so insistent you were repulsed by 🍆 specifically so how does that suddenly change? 🙈😂

    • @carmencar123
      @carmencar123 3 місяці тому +5

      He can’t get it up no more so😮

    • @kittybelly
      @kittybelly 2 місяці тому

      @@carmencar123They can, it’s just more of a process. Which is even more of a turn off, I would imagine.

  • @d11j09l92
    @d11j09l92 3 місяці тому +5

    The previous two were unhealthy, not to mention you started dating this one while you were still married to Eileen. Please take a break from dating.

  • @__tatiana__
    @__tatiana__ 3 місяці тому +9

    not againnnnnnn

  • @shannonmathews7235
    @shannonmathews7235 3 місяці тому +4

    My husband and I have been together for over 5 years. We have a 19 year age gap. And I've been questioned and no it's not for money because we're broke. It's because I laid eyes on him and I knew he was my person, he's so handsome , I just think he's the most wonderful person I've ever met. We even had a baby a few years ago and it's his first baby at 52. I've never been happier in my life. So I get it! Girl live your life, love who you want to love, and fuck what anyone else thinks.

  • @Regina.6692
    @Regina.6692 3 місяці тому +12

    She moved on fast, huh

    • @mason4966
      @mason4966 2 місяці тому +1

      Not quite. I think she "moved on" long before the actual divorce. She was very unhappy.

  • @kittybelly
    @kittybelly 2 місяці тому +1

    This feels so dark. And that’s coming from someone who was a sugar baby for ten plus years and dated older men in my 20s as well. You’re not being honest with yourself and your viewers can feel it. That’s why all these comments are calling you out as gentle as they can. It’s crazy to see an audience so disappointed across the board yet so supportive. This just popped up on my recommended. What a rabbit hole.
    She’s even repeating all the dogwhistles older people use to groom. “Mature” “responsible”. Woof. 🥴

  • @__elise333
    @__elise333 3 місяці тому +8

    Sexuality is complex and can be confusing! I feel like the labels just complicate it more. ( for me anyway ) But if you find one you feel comfy in, then go with it! Super happy for you Julia! You look so beautiful and happy :’)

  • @autumnt396
    @autumnt396 3 місяці тому +7

    That seems kind of fast. I think you should take time to heal

  • @zoooejenkins
    @zoooejenkins 3 місяці тому +17

    Every word you said described me. I also prefer a mature look over a youthful one. And older people are way more confident, experienced, and refined than younger people. I find them very magnetic and attractive.

  • @isaperez9667
    @isaperez9667 2 місяці тому +1

    I'm bisexual too. I've been married with a man for 23 years, and now I'm in an age gap relationship with a woman. I'm 15 years older than her and I am so in love. I understand you

  • @TiSa1985
    @TiSa1985 3 місяці тому +3

    You look so vibrant and happy :-) nice to see after such a long time with you looking unhappy. You like who you like, love who you love and we have nothing we can say about that. Important thing is that you are happy and that’s that. Will be exciting to see your introduction video of your hubby :-)

  • @Lietotajvards9
    @Lietotajvards9 3 місяці тому +76

    Youre attracted to older people because your dad wasnt present in your life so you want safety, stability, wisdom and someone who actually is present in your life and protects you.

    • @DaveGrohlsprincess
      @DaveGrohlsprincess 3 місяці тому +12

      I’m attracted too men older than me because my generation suck.

    • @MaryCostantini
      @MaryCostantini 3 місяці тому

      shut up

    • @stephaniebaird6937
      @stephaniebaird6937 3 місяці тому +7

      sooo where did you get your psychology degree from?

    • @CarolinaVasquezEnglish
      @CarolinaVasquezEnglish 3 місяці тому +10

      ​@stephaniebaird6937 you don't need to be a psychologist to see it.
      It is obvious at this point.

    • @hayleygrimes8804
      @hayleygrimes8804 3 місяці тому +2

      @@DaveGrohlsprincessSame.

  • @KaylaTotts
    @KaylaTotts 3 місяці тому +4

    I have mixed feelings on this, but its not my life or my relationship so who am i to say anything. Plus I've made my fair share of choices that people disagreed with. I will say you seem a lot happier

  • @EGO_200
    @EGO_200 3 місяці тому +36

    Uhm this is weird…
    You just got out of a marriage. Like seriously, moving into a new relationship so quickly?

  • @zelahfines6535
    @zelahfines6535 3 місяці тому +3

    Perhaps an unpopular opinion but I don’t think there is right time to get in a new relationship. Everyone is saying it’s too soon but if it’s right for you then it would be inauthentic to put it off simply so that others wouldn’t judge you, even though you feel up for it.
    No matter how it turns out in the end, it’s your journey.
    All the best!

  • @bellaramirez6806
    @bellaramirez6806 3 місяці тому +30

    Just because a divorce was recently finalized doesn’t mean she felt single a LOT longer ago. Like maybe over a year…you can be in a relationship on paper and not feel seen or heard or loved for a long time. She knows herself and her boundaries. Plus life is short let her live. You can’t control when you meet a person who is right for you.

    • @michellecrispino7349
      @michellecrispino7349 3 місяці тому +1

      Omg I'm soooooo happy you said this. I agree so much with this ❤

  • @katiewright4075
    @katiewright4075 3 місяці тому +2

    Julia, I’m so excited for you to introduce your new partner 😊 this video really resonates with my life right now and I’m so happy to be able to relate to someone going through a similar experience. I had also thought I was a lesbian prior to my current partner who is a man.. were also in an age gap relationship and have been together for 3 years. I’ve truly never been happier. It’s so good to see you smile and talk about how much you have in common because I can feel what you’re describing. Also, Everything you said relating to how you feel about men and women and coming to terms with being bisexual is seriously everything I have felt myself. When you mentioned the stigma against bisexuals even within the community .. it’s so true.. I’ll admit I used to have that same mindset about dating bisexual women when I thought I was fully lesbian.. never did I think I would be realizing that I like men as well. I can admit now that I used to have some toxic ways of thinking from internalized insecurities. We learn and we grow. don’t listen to the negative comments… if you’re happy In your new relationship that’s all that matters ❤

  • @determineddiva5402
    @determineddiva5402 24 дні тому

    I’ve been following you for years because you represent a lot of us that are into older ppl. I personally have always been attracted to really old men. Ppl have made fun of me for my attraction or they think I’m joking when I mention that I find liver spots sexy. I truly appreciate the fact that you love who you love out loud and unapologetically. I also truly appreciate how open you’ve been with your relationships with Maria and Eileen. I’m glad you found your new bf and are sharing this new experience with your supporters. You deserve happiness.

  • @jenniicaroline1218
    @jenniicaroline1218 3 місяці тому +4

    LOVE your makeup especially this lip color!! would love an updated makeup routine video!

  • @luckaregrat923
    @luckaregrat923 3 місяці тому +3

    Question: will you get your own place? Are you planning on staying in London or moving somewhere else? :) In the video you make it seem like staying at your partner's place is a temporary solution because you have just moved out of your ex wife's apartment.

  • @sabrinagarner8613
    @sabrinagarner8613 3 місяці тому +1

    One relationship to an other well i have done that and it doesn't work out in the long run. You should take time for yourself and find out who you are. No labels

  • @lorat.4701
    @lorat.4701 3 місяці тому +4

    Dear Julia! First of all you are not weird!! You are different and you stand out from the crowd and that is FANTASTIC. That is something to be cherished!!!! Thank you so so much for sharing your life with us. I have recently broke up with my girlfriend who was 20 years older than me and found myself (I swore for ages that I was a lesbian) dating an older man now. For the first time in 25 years. When I tell you our life is crazily similar (moved to the UK when I was 18 on my own too) I mean it and your openness always gives me hope that some people do actually understand and I am not alone. Might be a birthday thing as we share the same birthday (again lol what are the odds!) - I'm not sure, but thank you from the bottom of my heart and keep shining like the absolute star you are xx Always trust your gut and the glow you have lately - that's all you need to know you're on the right path.

  • @thedogmother603
    @thedogmother603 3 місяці тому +14

    I don’t comment on anything social media wise usually but I wanted to say a couple things here.
    1. You don’t have to specifically define your sexuality. I understand being in the spotlight might be the reason you feel you have to, but you can just be “Julia”. Sexuality can be a hard thing to define. You love who you love.
    2. Once you started talking about your new person, your demeanor changed. You are glowing and come across as genuinely happy with this companion. He sounds interesting and I look forward to “meeting” him. 😊

  • @bangbutton8322
    @bangbutton8322 3 місяці тому +13

    Have you considered being single?

  • @HiHi-lt1cb
    @HiHi-lt1cb 3 місяці тому +9

    I don't think age matters as long as you're both adults. I hope you're happy! 😊

  • @isthatyoursandwich
    @isthatyoursandwich 3 місяці тому +4

    Girl take time to find yourself and to heal

  • @MissLea922
    @MissLea922 3 місяці тому +5

    Does he have any children? Or does he want children?

  • @crvenalee
    @crvenalee 3 місяці тому +4

    Please work on your mental health and trauma. Dating can wait. Father figure was absent, you might have an issue that requires attention. Take care of yourself, please

  • @AA-lq5pu
    @AA-lq5pu Місяць тому

    Its best to take a year off to heal. When I took off a year to heal and watched many psychology videos it made me see the patterns. And now I know I will never get into another toxic relationship again. I also one had a thing for someone who was like 40 years older than me so I do understand the attraction.

  • @vladdybrooker
    @vladdybrooker 3 місяці тому +5

    Friendly advice here... But older men can expect you to mother them whilst also expecting to call all of the shots

  • @drnot442
    @drnot442 3 місяці тому +1

    It’s “so great to have someone on your team” 💯! This is so true, and I’m so happy for you!

  • @karleensage5613
    @karleensage5613 3 місяці тому +2

    Sounds like a new relationship with butterflies. Eventually, butterflies die, taking care of daddies girls short lived . A year from now, let us know what happening, hopefully no broken hearts.

  • @tinashort9098
    @tinashort9098 3 місяці тому +12

    Damn…how bad was Eileen for Julia to go straight😂😂😂😂

  • @marianavalemari5250
    @marianavalemari5250 3 місяці тому +10

    I’m 100% supportive of you making your own choices, but I’m Brazilian, and don’t blame Brazil on it. Yes, it was normal at a certain time that our grandparents had an age gap relationship, but you’re not living in Brazil, I don’t know how much culture from Brazil you’re watching since you moved, but I didn’t see you helping while you were in Brazil people who were suffering with the big tragedy that it was happening on Rio Grande do Sul, and there isn’t a single video on your UA-cam channel dedicated to talk about what happened at Rio Grande do Sul, and how people could help, which would been great since most of your viewers aren’t from Brazil. And it isn’t normalized in Brasil as much as it was before relationships with an big age difference. I love your content, I support your life choices, but you can’t go out at UA-cam, talking in English with an community who isn’t from Brazil and blaming on Brazil as a way to justify why you feel attracted to older people

    • @XxXRedSkullsXxX
      @XxXRedSkullsXxX 3 місяці тому +2

      That isn't what she said at all. 😂

  • @bethgardner2257
    @bethgardner2257 3 місяці тому +4

    I’m obsessed with the hair/hair clips/top combo in this video 😍 you’re glowing!!

  • @MakenzieHallie
    @MakenzieHallie 3 місяці тому +10

    I am so happy for you girl!! 🎉 You seem like your glowing. So excited for you to have an equal in a partner. Someone truly supportive in all ways. You deserve it!! ❤

  • @ladyredl3210
    @ladyredl3210 3 місяці тому +4

    Congratulations on your new relationship, Julia. Whatever makes you the happiest should be top priority.

  • @kayleighjweb
    @kayleighjweb 3 місяці тому +9

    Honestly you are GLOWING and your hair and everything just looks so amazing!!! I’m so happy for you and can’t wait for your future videos 😭💖

  • @Ghostywiththemosty
    @Ghostywiththemosty 3 місяці тому +5

    Will never understand dating people you will out exist but want you to be happy wish your content wouldn’t be so relationship based feel like we haven’t had a Julia focusing on Julia era in a long long time

  • @PharmacyTechLabs
    @PharmacyTechLabs 3 місяці тому +35

    You have not even let the sheets cool down, and already, you have another person. That's nuts!

    • @medusa2234
      @medusa2234 3 місяці тому +11

      Let her live her life. If you were in a long relationship which war not good for a long time, you often moved on long time ago. If you have not lived through it you cannot understand. Also, everybody is different.

    • @PharmacyTechLabs
      @PharmacyTechLabs 3 місяці тому +1

      @@medusa2234 Yeah, I've seen a few go from relationship to relationship. 😄 🤣 😂

    • @medusa2234
      @medusa2234 3 місяці тому

      If you do it chronically it is another story again..

    • @PharmacyTechLabs
      @PharmacyTechLabs 3 місяці тому +1

      @@medusa2234 Yes, I believe she will.

    • @oofihavenousernameideas2451
      @oofihavenousernameideas2451 3 місяці тому +2

      It’s unhealthy