Marry, F*ck, Get Killed By (Dead Meat Podcast #43)

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  • Опубліковано 22 сер 2024
  • James and Chelsea play Marry, F*ck, Get Killed By. James has a thing for trucks.
    This episode sponsored by Squarespace! Try it for free at Squarespace.com/deadmeat.
    Get the full Dead Meat Podcast RSS Feed! ► cms.megaphone....
    Dead Meat on Social Media:
    Twitter ► / deadmeatjames
    Instagram ► / deadmeatjames
    Tiktok ► / deadmeatjames
    Facebook ► / deadmeatjames
    Chelsea Rebecca on Social Media:
    Twitter ► / carebecc
    Instagram ► / carebecc
    James A. Janisse on Social Media:
    Twitter ► / jamesajanisse
    Instagram ► / jamesajanisse
    Practical Folks (James and Chelsea's other channel):
    / practicalfolks
    MUSIC!!
    ~~Logo~~
    "U Make Me Feel" by MK2

КОМЕНТАРІ • 745

  • @dreaveronica6944
    @dreaveronica6944 5 років тому +957

    Come on James, how can you pass up on marrying Leatherface? He cooks, he's an interior designer, he would prbably get all dressed up and pretty for you but like would also have your back if anyone tries to mess with you. You chose wrong on that one man!

    • @Primekillerboy
      @Primekillerboy 5 років тому +82

      I think despite being a mass murderer, Leatherface would be the sub in any relationship given how easily his family bullies him : c But he's a big boi so that's ok!!!

    • @missi5059
      @missi5059 5 років тому +25

      I'd marry leather face in a heart beat.

    • @plantain.1739
      @plantain.1739 4 роки тому +37

      @@Primekillerboy Sub? SUB!? That boys a gentle top and you know it!

    • @HGmolotov
      @HGmolotov 4 роки тому +28

      @@Primekillerboy clearly you haven't seen Texas chainsaw 2

    • @memelord7567
      @memelord7567 4 роки тому +26

      Oh yeah and he's loyal. If someone talks shit about his fam, they're dead meat.

  • @reviveonset
    @reviveonset 5 років тому +713

    filing them taxes with oogie boogie

    • @mothmania1680
      @mothmania1680 5 років тому +35

      revive bold of you to assume he would even pay the taxes

  • @QueenMJade89
    @QueenMJade89 5 років тому +130

    Love the priorities! 🤣😆
    Chelsea: "None of these are fun ways to die. "
    James: :None of these are fun ways to fuck!"

  • @imsad6565
    @imsad6565 5 років тому +489

    James and Chelsea are *precious*

  • @emsguybob
    @emsguybob Рік тому +59

    Marrying Christine is more complicated than buying a car. Remember how jealous she gets ... if you even look at another girl!

    • @basementdwellercosplay
      @basementdwellercosplay Рік тому +7

      Don't even think about calling an uber

    • @Sharpe1502
      @Sharpe1502 10 місяців тому +6

      However, you’d never need car insurance because she repairs herself.

  • @mikusmachmane1898
    @mikusmachmane1898 5 років тому +67

    I died at James explaining the nastiness of the f#%$ing

  • @kaialexander6806
    @kaialexander6806 5 років тому +353

    Tbh I'm totally up for marrying a super intelligent shark, I wanna have a super intelligent shark wife.

    • @kingkraken583
      @kingkraken583 5 років тому +9

      Hayley Weasley don’t we all

    • @Nougatbars
      @Nougatbars 2 роки тому +1

      Same! That’s what I picked.

  • @EJMoreno
    @EJMoreno 5 років тому +254

    I have never laughed this much during one of your podcasts before. I usually love them, but this was just amazing.

  • @NervousYoungInhuman
    @NervousYoungInhuman 5 років тому +510

    Dead meat? More like
    Alive veggies

    • @thespecter6416
      @thespecter6416 5 років тому +31

      More like Beat Meat

    • @garrt8949
      @garrt8949 5 років тому +4

      Hahahaha

    • @bingbonghafu
      @bingbonghafu 5 років тому +3

      AHEEEHEEHEEHEHEHOOOOOO

    • @uwu-jn8yl
      @uwu-jn8yl 5 років тому +5

      That sound like a non horror channel version of dead meat

    • @codyscheel6214
      @codyscheel6214 5 років тому +2

      Superstar PLAYER LOUISPLAYZ yeah

  • @mizellda4902
    @mizellda4902 3 роки тому +17

    49:23
    PFFT MY HAND FLEW TO MY MOUTH. I'M MARRYING THE CANDYMAN IN A HEARTBEAT.

  • @soulreaper6194
    @soulreaper6194 5 років тому +181

    I imagine the lady in the radiator cheeks would feel like oatmeal

  • @stephenstotch7471
    @stephenstotch7471 4 роки тому +28

    Petition for them to release that half-hour-long ‘F*cm, Marry, Get Killed By’ episode

  • @porkychedwick7396
    @porkychedwick7396 5 років тому +662

    Roses are red
    Violets are red
    Grass is red
    My garden is on fire

    • @arnavdass4695
      @arnavdass4695 5 років тому +16

      Jack Blessis creativity level
      💯💯

    • @durkiokrazy9855
      @durkiokrazy9855 5 років тому +6

      😂😂😂

    • @annihia3538
      @annihia3538 5 років тому +6

      Jack Blessis i know that joke

    • @annihia3538
      @annihia3538 5 років тому +5

      Arnav Dass it is on a show called dank doodle memes

    • @WhatLilMan
      @WhatLilMan 5 років тому +1

      What??

  • @GSnickerz
    @GSnickerz 5 років тому +78

    When are we getting ‘That’ll dampen your lamps’ merch?

  • @jokafoxy6516
    @jokafoxy6516 5 років тому +157

    can you show pics of the people if you ever do this again please? i want to get into it but i dont know who half of the people you're saying are.

  • @seanpaullawrence4836
    @seanpaullawrence4836 5 років тому +55

    James look of disappointment when Chelsea says doll tiffany 🤣🤣🤣

  • @nailsarelife
    @nailsarelife 2 роки тому +14

    The thing about getting killed by Mama is you'll either get a gruesome offscreen death that's quick, or she'll turn you into butterflies.

  • @break_the_galaxy
    @break_the_galaxy 2 роки тому +14

    As someone who has been a fan of The Nightmare Before Christmas pretty much ever since I was able to understand what the hell was happening in it, James' Oogie Boogie impression fcking kills me every time I watch this episode

  • @jules-sk5qu
    @jules-sk5qu 5 років тому +102

    *never knew this trend was going to be in in your channel*

  • @landonsimecek6795
    @landonsimecek6795 5 років тому +63

    James’s face at 8:43 shows exactly how everyone feels about Chelsea marrying anyone but him.

  • @hernanmerenzon8024
    @hernanmerenzon8024 5 років тому +17

    5:30 “I’m in Love with my Car” (Queen)

    • @arbiterofbenclan6820
      @arbiterofbenclan6820 5 років тому

      'I want something that kids can turn up and bang their heads to'

  • @babystone42
    @babystone42 Рік тому +7

    2 things, 4 years later 😂
    1. I think Chelsea forgot how hot Frank was under the mask...
    2. Donnie Darko ABSOLUTELY holds up. It's one of my favorite movies in general.

  • @brianarnold1170
    @brianarnold1170 5 років тому +78

    Marry : Chelsea
    F: James
    GKB: Both #Dreams

  • @hillhouseproductions
    @hillhouseproductions 5 років тому +75

    Donnie Darko absolutely holds up.

    • @jimkaplanarts
      @jimkaplanarts 2 роки тому +7

      YES. Came here to say this 3 years later.

    • @westofley
      @westofley Рік тому

      and frank was clearly the pick for fuck. Dude was hot

  • @Zeddyboi86
    @Zeddyboi86 5 років тому +45

    18:30. James’ face when he said “What?” was priceless!

  • @inkwithcaution
    @inkwithcaution 5 років тому +16

    "I'll just marry the shark" - Chelsea. Put that on a shirt please and on the back... Dead Meat lol

  • @hatedfruit9322
    @hatedfruit9322 5 років тому +60

    James broke the 4th wall at 12:40

    • @schuettjoel
      @schuettjoel 5 років тому +13

      I mean, there really wasn't a wall

    • @kevingutierrez5473
      @kevingutierrez5473 5 років тому +3

      Breaking the 4th wall is where the person in a videogame movie or video looks at you or is aware that your there

  • @habuhomeboy
    @habuhomeboy 5 років тому +20

    ALSO ALSO, Donnie Darko most definitely holds up. Its still amazing.

  • @lizmitchell4647
    @lizmitchell4647 5 років тому +47

    this whole episode is just reminding me of james reacting to chelsea going "what are your staNDARDS THEN" in drunk disney

  • @jeff95ist
    @jeff95ist 2 роки тому +8

    “None of these are a fun way to die”
    “None of these are a fun one to fuck”
    Lmao that was great

  • @darwyndehnke8217
    @darwyndehnke8217 5 років тому +34

    Donnie Darko still holds up, it's timeless imo, no pun intended...

  • @BabylonTerminator1
    @BabylonTerminator1 2 роки тому +14

    This is the only video on UA-cam where hearing the sentence "I'm gonna fuck that doll" isn't THAT weird

  • @Zeddyboi86
    @Zeddyboi86 5 років тому +14

    This is probably a bit odd, but DANG I like your guys’ shirts! (I have a weakness for plaid.) And the blend of red and blue is very complementary.

  • @KerioFive
    @KerioFive Рік тому +6

    y'all are the cutest couple ever.

  • @mctheplaywright
    @mctheplaywright 10 місяців тому +3

    “What are you going to do with your shark husband, or shark wife… it’s legal now” the way James says that makes it sound like gay shark marriage was recently legalized and he’s not psyched about it 😂

  • @lizzie4000
    @lizzie4000 5 років тому +50

    Why is Chelsea so cute?! You two are so adorable !!

  • @Realist00
    @Realist00 5 років тому +13

    Donnie Darko holds up. Make sure you watch Directors cut

  • @morganrhodes159
    @morganrhodes159 5 років тому +11

    You can never look eachother in the eye 😂😂😂

  • @ariagray4959
    @ariagray4959 5 років тому +33

    I'm early for once, love the podcast and the channel so much. Thank you for the humor you give me when I'm feeling bad

  • @ben2953
    @ben2953 5 років тому +45

    Im not deadmeat im grilled steak

  • @keane2182
    @keane2182 5 років тому +51

    Id love some pictures of the characters, barely know any that you say 😅

  • @ptboy18
    @ptboy18 4 роки тому +10

    1:58 " Because when you marry someone...you fuckem...YOU FUHKUM!" Such a hilarious delivery of that phrase. Also what sexual deparavities are yall referring to? *fans self

  • @darcytheaussie3097
    @darcytheaussie3097 5 років тому +559

    If you got this far in the comments...
    You get a participation award.

  • @SiRenfield
    @SiRenfield Рік тому +1

    When Dr. Hill’s head came out gave it some thought and I similarly went…”maybe f&$k if it’s *consensual* this time”. I mean I’m at least curious about a severed head going to town

  • @miss.belladonned
    @miss.belladonned 2 роки тому +5

    I forever envy the way James looks at Chelsea

  • @JustinY.
    @JustinY. 5 років тому +79

    If you get killed by DIO, at least you'll enjoy a donut before you die.

  • @maxmora647
    @maxmora647 5 років тому +6

    This was hilarious. Thanks for the laughs, guys.

  • @bsfilms3816
    @bsfilms3816 5 років тому +5

    2:00 James goes in depth about fucking is hilarious😂

  • @marcheeps6175
    @marcheeps6175 5 років тому +19

    When Yoda hit hard times he became lipstick gremlin

  • @garisonjones8062
    @garisonjones8062 5 років тому +4

    14:32 why can I see this so vividly?

  • @elonna8146
    @elonna8146 5 років тому +44

    This channel never disappoints. 😂 I always say I'm not gonna comment while watching the videos but I'm only 4 minutes in and here I am.

  • @reallostblueboy
    @reallostblueboy 5 років тому +11

    Dead meat?
    More like bread beet.

  • @hunterpelt2151
    @hunterpelt2151 5 років тому +4

    I listen to these podcasts while I work on my doctoral dissertation.... I'm not sure if it makes more or less productive.... I've no regrets.

  • @KatRenfigures
    @KatRenfigures 5 років тому +5

    Trick r treaters to do all your chores. That's amazing! Yes marry Oogie!

  • @BlazerTheDemon
    @BlazerTheDemon 5 років тому +3

    1:22 Lol James XD That was me waiting for the rumble. Good videos and keep it up!

  • @kingofthedead5675
    @kingofthedead5675 5 років тому +4

    2 mill here since the start look forward to every Friday now!

  • @toastbears
    @toastbears 3 роки тому +6

    James casually reasoning out how he could face fuck the lady in the radiator has both ruined my day and saved my week
    Shark Husband also still stands as a phenomenal pick, shark husband means u are immune to any possible future killer shark scenarios, probably, maybe, or at least gives you a front row seat for an epic monster battle a la King Kong
    gg

  • @Noah-we4oc
    @Noah-we4oc 5 років тому +5

    "Sexy leatherface from texas chainsaw massacre"
    -Joey Tribbiani

  • @lorettaaa_reacts
    @lorettaaa_reacts 5 років тому +3

    I’ve really been enjoying listening/watching the podcast. It’s fun to listen to when I’m in the tub too 😂

  • @marybellefleur
    @marybellefleur 2 роки тому +1

    This is just the thing I needed to listen to today. It's silly and sweet and makes the office paperwork fly by. Thanks you two.

  • @ronincruickshank4175
    @ronincruickshank4175 5 років тому +2

    Here's one
    Ricky Chapman/Caldwell (Silent night deadly night).
    Angela Baker (Sleepaway Camp).
    Freddy ( Busta Rhymes from Halloween 8).

    • @mizellda4902
      @mizellda4902 3 роки тому

      Probably Marry Angela, Fuq Ricky, and Get killed by Freddy ig

  • @Mewwt
    @Mewwt 5 років тому +17

    Frank from Donnie Darko does have a confirmed kill, albeit an accident. Vehicular manslaughter.
    Oh, and I think the film holds up, but the director's cut, not the theatrical. It adds some stuff that makes the film make some sort of sense.

  • @jasonking7570
    @jasonking7570 5 років тому +6

    Oh my God 😂😂 honestly, I love that you guys are so comfortable as to play this game and post it. It's really awesome 😁😁
    Also, "None of these are fun ways to fuck" James A Janisse, 2018

  • @kianleslie6248
    @kianleslie6248 3 роки тому +3

    18:30 Jame's face XXDDD

  • @geistbeatz
    @geistbeatz 5 років тому +4

    Damn James has a thing for the Sawyers apparently haha

  • @dankwolf2465
    @dankwolf2465 5 років тому +15

    This made me laugh so much especially when it got to the Orphan discussion "Now I'm on a list," that got me laughing really good. Nice guys, also she's I believe the Orphan is 33 in the movie I recently watched it.

  • @TheNoble117
    @TheNoble117 5 років тому +13

    I feel like if I had the choice of Freddy I’d want to get killed by him because I’d like to see what crazy stuff he’d pull

  • @Finchese
    @Finchese 5 років тому +140

    PewDiePie VS T-Series (2018-19) KILL COUNT
    Uploaded by Dead Meat 2 mins ago

  • @quantumcadence142
    @quantumcadence142 5 років тому +1

    Knowing you watch WWE, even if it’s just the Rumble, adds so many layers to how much I love you guys.

  • @shamonwright
    @shamonwright 5 років тому +1

    Donnie Darko held up pretty well when I saw it for my first time last year, became a favorite of mine.

  • @NamelessWilkins
    @NamelessWilkins 11 місяців тому +1

    This is couple goals.

  • @ghostiegoober108
    @ghostiegoober108 5 років тому +13

    I wonder what that says about you when someone rather marry a shark...

  • @juliannakropla
    @juliannakropla 5 років тому +3

    Donnie Darko is definitely good! I might be biased though as its one of my favorite movies. The whole timeline and time travel business within the movie is hard to follow at times but it holds up well. Definitely would recommend watching it!!

  • @evanwalker6444
    @evanwalker6444 5 років тому +4

    I like how at the beginning of this video James just clarified the difference between marry and fuck 😂 I love this

  • @scetchman12
    @scetchman12 4 роки тому +6

    I loved when James said “You’re joking, I can’t believe my eyes”. I genuinely thought it was a clip from the movie.

  • @kylebenson889
    @kylebenson889 5 років тому +2

    GEOCITIES!!!! so many memories

  • @Gay_fraggle
    @Gay_fraggle 7 місяців тому

    For some reason this reminded me of the fact that IT IS CANON that if Chop Top scratches one specific part on his metal plate, he will insistently get off
    I have no clue why but I thought it was funny

  • @JahmezFox
    @JahmezFox Рік тому +1

    Man, some of these were rough choices but I’m glad they both got to end with a fun one

  • @BigLee1901
    @BigLee1901 8 місяців тому

    How Conal Cochran takes the Stonehenge piece, I have a stupid theory just for a good laugh, I picture this taking place after Leprechaun 4: In Space, the giant Leprechaun ends up on Earth and picks up the piece of Stonehenge like a toy block and brings it to California for Cochran (Cochran did say we wouldn't believe how they got it there, and that's a way I wouldn't believe if my life depended on it, especially considering Leprechaun 4 takes place way in the future, but it's possible that he time traveled into the past)

  • @trevorthepoop
    @trevorthepoop 5 років тому +3

    1:20 me recording on royal rumble night (I wouldn't in case I missed it)

  • @JahmezFox
    @JahmezFox Рік тому +1

    42:11 man I’d marry the shit out of Connal Cochrane, dude owns a toy company, I’m basically marrying into a fortune

  • @freshchris9457
    @freshchris9457 5 років тому +6

    the title tells me i'm going to love this vid

  • @emilydougherty6623
    @emilydougherty6623 5 років тому +2

    8:43 Jame’s reaction

  • @conradsmith6619
    @conradsmith6619 5 років тому +2

    You guys function so well as a couple.

  • @ItchyPeenar
    @ItchyPeenar 5 років тому +5

    you guys should play Dead By Daylight on the channel sometime

  • @genozuzek7401
    @genozuzek7401 Рік тому

    I met Bill Mosely at a convention. Couldn't have been sweeter. You can tell James, he's a generous lover.

  • @arthurojimenez883
    @arthurojimenez883 5 років тому +1

    Ya'll are the best! These Podcast games are my fave! ❤

  • @lightswitch8868
    @lightswitch8868 5 років тому +3

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOEL ARNOLD!!!!!!!
    Is it that Joel? Or a different one cuz theres a lot of Joels lately, its like an invasion

  • @rohithkumar8708
    @rohithkumar8708 4 роки тому +1

    7:10 .... 🤣🤣🤣🤣, It's funny hearing to that now.

  • @noaharnold18
    @noaharnold18 5 років тому +1

    Can I just say I LOOOOOOVE that James is into wrestling because I’m a huge wrestling fan!!

  • @Cryptosuchus
    @Cryptosuchus 5 років тому +388

    *Don't press read more* 🤔
    *You now have good luck for the rest* *of 2019 Have a good day* 😁👍

  • @DocStewie77
    @DocStewie77 5 років тому +1

    I'm literally already 47 minutes into this on Spotify, but don't think I'm not about to watch this, too.

  • @moviemoth4192
    @moviemoth4192 5 років тому +1

    Great now I’m playing fuck, marry, get killed by with my friends lmao 😂

  • @JahmezFox
    @JahmezFox Рік тому

    23:36 all I can think is “is tamra here?” over and over and over 😅😅

  • @janajackson4626
    @janajackson4626 5 років тому +3

    honestly, the podcast episode i didn’t know I needed.

  • @rhea.treece
    @rhea.treece Рік тому +1

    6:35 something in my brain needs to be studied cus why was my immediate reaction to chelsea saying this "FUCK FRANK THE RABBIT!!!"

  • @blikboygaming6205
    @blikboygaming6205 5 років тому +7

    Love the podcast but got notification in school got a detention

  • @ProbablyHunter
    @ProbablyHunter 5 років тому +1

    I gotta agree I was very impatient for the rumble aswell

  • @noahfredenburg3993
    @noahfredenburg3993 5 років тому +1

    Marry Laurie Strode, F*** Michael Myers, get killed by Audrey Two 😂

  • @witchbtch8155
    @witchbtch8155 5 років тому +5

    I'm not typically a podcast person but honestly, I've gotten really into listening to you guys. Even though you're discussing horror movies, it's so comforting for whatever reason lol Keep up the good work guys!