Psychology Lecture: Coping with Grief and Loss by Sheila Schindler

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  • Опубліковано 25 жов 2017
  • Sheila Schindler is a Licensed Master Social Worker specializing in end of life and bereavement care on the Pediatric Team at Hospice of Michigan and an adjunct professor at GRCC. The very painful experience of grief and loss affects nearly all human beings at some point in their lifetime. In this presentation, the bio-psycho-social dynamics of grief will be explored, along with a discussion of the research on healthy ways to cope with loss. Expressive therapies and goals of grieving will be presented in order to provide some direction and hope for people coping with a loss or supporting another in grief.

КОМЕНТАРІ • 26

  • @mbords01
    @mbords01 3 роки тому +7

    Yes, we all should realize it is "unavoidable"; yet when this hits you, you are numb and paralyzed. No medication to relieve this! You almost become a dead tree trunk-- you feel hollow inside; it is just a matter a time when you eventually fall!

  • @ioanekirarahu951
    @ioanekirarahu951 2 роки тому +9

    I'm 68, and my wife died a few days ago. People generally I feel have no idea about this stuff until they actually go through it. My sister died in 1997, and my father died in 1985. That were hard sure, but nothing like this. My wife had a pair of significant strokes in quick succession, which completely incapacitated her, so we could see it coming. The past few visits she couldn't talk, and couldn't hardly move. But she responded enough with gestures that she knew I was there, and was happy to see me. It is hard to even know what I'm feeling, let along know how to deal with it. I hope this video isn't too old to get some kind of response. People are kind, and I recognize and appreciate that. I'm sure some of them may have gone through what I'm talking about, but I doubt the majority.

    • @ioanekirarahu951
      @ioanekirarahu951 2 роки тому +2

      This is a few days later, and while it hasn't been long, I am starting to feel better, but it still goes up and down and up and down.

    • @DachshundPal
      @DachshundPal 2 роки тому +1

      I’m sorry for your loss. Thank you for posting your update on this platform. I am glad that you are starting to have moments in which you feel better. It brings me comfort in my grief to know that with time I too may have moments that are better. Thank you again and take care.

    • @kelleymcfadden9675
      @kelleymcfadden9675 2 роки тому +1

      Please allow me to share my best friend's story with you, not to compare her experience with anyone else's, but to help you find true peace, comfort and hope. God bless you!
      Family Story
      Little did our family of six know that Friday evening, September 24th, 2021, would be the last night our family would be complete. We laughed together, played games, sang, and enjoyed listening as our 16-year-old son, Ethan, played the piano for us. I packed a lunch for Ethan for a church mountain hike he was going on the following day.
      My mother (who was visiting from out of state) and I woke early with Ethan on Saturday morning. He hugged me and smiled, never pulling away or rushing me. He got in the car, waved, said he'd see me later and he loved me. It was hard to watch my "new driver" heading out on his own that morning. As Ethan pulled out of the gate, I turned to my mother and said, "It's just so hard letting go." Little did I know how much "letting go" I was really doing. That was the last time I saw Ethan. He did not make it home that evening.
      That afternoon, a friend tried to contact my husband, leaving an urgent message to call him back. He tried several times to return the call to no avail. As we were preparing supper, an overwhelming feeling of deep concern for Ethan filled my heart. I quietly blinked back tears. I glanced out the window, half expecting to see a police officer pull up to the house, but no one arrived. However, within a few minutes, a patrol car DID pull into the driveway. In my heart, I feared the worst. My husband and I went out to meet the officer, who confirmed our fears. Hesitantly, he told us our son had fallen off of
      a bluff and had succumbed to his injuries. Our hearts were crushed; they still are.
      Yet, in all of our brokenness, deep, continual grief and loneliness, our family has such a blessed Hope and assurance that we will see our dear son and brother again. You see, when Ethan was a young boy, he was saved; he put his faith in Jesus alone to forgive his sins and to take him to Heaven when he died. He realized some very important truths from the Bible that he would want to share with you.
      His Story
      Everyone is a sinner. Sin is any violation of God’s Law. God is holy, just and righteous, and He cannot allow sin in His presence. Ethan realized that he - like all of us - had sinned; and his sin separated Him from God.
      “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; ” (Romans 3:23)
      “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” (Romans 5:12)
      He understood that, because of his sin, he deserved to spend eternity in Hell.
      “For the wages of sin is death;” (Romans 6:23a) [Wages: price]
      “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8)
      Ethan believed that Jesus, God’s Son, paid the price for all sin when He died on the cross - because His sinless sacrifice was the only thing that could satisfy the just demands of a righteous, holy God. Jesus was buried in a borrowed tomb, but He arose the third day, triumphant over sin, death, and Hell. Jesus is alive today!
      “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
      “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9)
      Ethan was sorry for his sin, repented (turned), and received by faith the free gift that God offered to him.
      “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
      “...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23b)
      Because of this great salvation, Ethan lived his life serving Jesus. He worked hard to spread this Good News to the world. He is alive in Heaven with Jesus today; and because of this great HOPE in Christ, we know we will see him again soon - not because he was a great kid, but because of his faith in the great Saviour!
      “And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.” (John 10:28)
      Your Story
      What about you? What if you had fallen to your death that day - What if you were to die today? Where will you spend eternity - Heaven or the Lake of Fire? There will not be any parties in the Lake of Fire. It is a place of eternal torment for those who reject God's Son.
      The Word of God is very clear that there is only One Way to Heaven.
      “Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)
      We did not know that Ethan would step into eternity that day; however, because he put his faith in Jesus alone for his salvation, Ethan was ready to go. Some day - perhaps today - you will take your last breath here on earth, and you will step into eternity. Where you spend eternity is determined by what you do with Jesus Christ. Will you accept Him or reject Him? You are not promised another day or another breath. Eternity begins soon - Are you ready?
      “...Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved…” (Acts 16:31b)
      “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
      “(...behold, now is the day of salvation.)” (2 Corinthians 6:2c)
      ******************************
      This testimony has been made into a tract form as well, so if you or your church are interested in having them to pass out, please go to libertyfaith.net and you will find our contact info there. God bless!
      Tribute to Ethan Lakey
      ua-cam.com/video/EhobcQZ6Qb8/v-deo.html

    • @carolmusselman8859
      @carolmusselman8859 Рік тому

      My mom died May 1, 22, today is her birthday, she would've been 89, I miss her and I'm so sad.

    • @ioanekirarahu951
      @ioanekirarahu951 Рік тому +1

      @@carolmusselman8859 I'm sorry for your loss. This is the way of life-out close ones eventually leave us, but it is still difficult. Best to you.

  • @mininarayanan656
    @mininarayanan656 2 роки тому +1

    Beautiful talk. Thank you so much for sharing and for being YOU in the talk.

  • @cherylross393
    @cherylross393 Рік тому

    Grief really shuts you down it's so horrendous 😞. It's true it comes in waves.🌊 and you never get used to it each time is different.

  • @garymoore354
    @garymoore354 Рік тому

    This was very helpful and informative 👏

  • @dtylice
    @dtylice 2 місяці тому

    Four months? Support evaporated more quickly than that for me.

  • @cherylross393
    @cherylross393 Рік тому +1

    Dreaming that it isn't true but just a bad dream.

  • @cherylross393
    @cherylross393 Рік тому

    Wish we could go together in loving group's ❤️ but we can't 😭. Love is conducive of grief.

  • @sniperammow4865
    @sniperammow4865 3 роки тому +3

    . my moms sister died and she is very sad, trying to fix that rn.

  • @dianelindenberger6941
    @dianelindenberger6941 Рік тому +1

    There is no timeline to feeling grief

  • @kelleymcfadden9675
    @kelleymcfadden9675 2 роки тому

    Please allow me to share my best friend's story with you, not to compare her experience with anyone else's, but to help you find true peace, comfort and hope. God bless you!
    Family Story
    Little did our family of six know that Friday evening, September 24th, 2021, would be the last night our family would be complete. We laughed together, played games, sang, and enjoyed listening as our 16-year-old son, Ethan, played the piano for us. I packed a lunch for Ethan for a church mountain hike he was going on the following day.
    My mother (who was visiting from out of state) and I woke early with Ethan on Saturday morning. He hugged me and smiled, never pulling away or rushing me. He got in the car, waved, said he'd see me later and he loved me. It was hard to watch my "new driver" heading out on his own that morning. As Ethan pulled out of the gate, I turned to my mother and said, "It's just so hard letting go." Little did I know how much "letting go" I was really doing. That was the last time I saw Ethan. He did not make it home that evening.
    That afternoon, a friend tried to contact my husband, leaving an urgent message to call him back. He tried several times to return the call to no avail. As we were preparing supper, an overwhelming feeling of deep concern for Ethan filled my heart. I quietly blinked back tears. I glanced out the window, half expecting to see a police officer pull up to the house, but no one arrived. However, within a few minutes, a patrol car DID pull into the driveway. In my heart, I feared the worst. My husband and I went out to meet the officer, who confirmed our fears. Hesitantly, he told us our son had fallen off of
    a bluff and had succumbed to his injuries. Our hearts were crushed; they still are.
    Yet, in all of our brokenness, deep, continual grief and loneliness, our family has such a blessed Hope and assurance that we will see our dear son and brother again. You see, when Ethan was a young boy, he was saved; he put his faith in Jesus alone to forgive his sins and to take him to Heaven when he died. He realized some very important truths from the Bible that he would want to share with you.
    His Story
    Everyone is a sinner. Sin is any violation of God’s Law. God is holy, just and righteous, and He cannot allow sin in His presence. Ethan realized that he - like all of us - had sinned; and his sin separated Him from God.
    “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; ” (Romans 3:23)
    “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” (Romans 5:12)
    He understood that, because of his sin, he deserved to spend eternity in Hell.
    “For the wages of sin is death;” (Romans 6:23a) [Wages: price]
    “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8)
    Ethan believed that Jesus, God’s Son, paid the price for all sin when He died on the cross - because His sinless sacrifice was the only thing that could satisfy the just demands of a righteous, holy God. Jesus was buried in a borrowed tomb, but He arose the third day, triumphant over sin, death, and Hell. Jesus is alive today!
    “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
    “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9)
    Ethan was sorry for his sin, repented (turned), and received by faith the free gift that God offered to him.
    “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
    “...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23b)
    Because of this great salvation, Ethan lived his life serving Jesus. He worked hard to spread this Good News to the world. He is alive in Heaven with Jesus today; and because of this great HOPE in Christ, we know we will see him again soon - not because he was a great kid, but because of his faith in the great Saviour!
    “And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.” (John 10:28)
    Your Story
    What about you? What if you had fallen to your death that day - What if you were to die today? Where will you spend eternity - Heaven or the Lake of Fire? There will not be any parties in the Lake of Fire. It is a place of eternal torment for those who reject God's Son.
    The Word of God is very clear that there is only One Way to Heaven.
    “Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)
    We did not know that Ethan would step into eternity that day; however, because he put his faith in Jesus alone for his salvation, Ethan was ready to go. Some day - perhaps today - you will take your last breath here on earth, and you will step into eternity. Where you spend eternity is determined by what you do with Jesus Christ. Will you accept Him or reject Him? You are not promised another day or another breath. Eternity begins soon - Are you ready?
    “...Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved…” (Acts 16:31b)
    “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
    “(...behold, now is the day of salvation.)” (2 Corinthians 6:2c)
    ******************************
    This testimony has been made into a tract form as well, so if you or your church are interested in having them to pass out, please go to libertyfaith.net and you will find our contact info there. God bless!
    Tribute to Ethan Lakey
    ua-cam.com/video/EhobcQZ6Qb8/v-deo.html

  • @cherylross393
    @cherylross393 Рік тому

    Saying things is not really useful at these points 😕 Better to be there to listen mostly or do thing's to help out during the loss.

  • @cherylross393
    @cherylross393 Рік тому

    Such a sad fast horrid story.😧😭

  • @pennyschnee-bosch8058
    @pennyschnee-bosch8058 2 роки тому +1

    I need support.
    A free support group, if possible.
    Please reach out to me if you have any information to provide. Thank you and blessings..

    • @marie2721
      @marie2721 2 роки тому +1

      Compassionate friends and Griefshare

    • @kelleymcfadden9675
      @kelleymcfadden9675 2 роки тому

      Please allow me to share my best friend's story with you, not to compare her experience with anyone else's, but to help you find true peace, comfort and hope. God bless you!
      Family Story
      Little did our family of six know that Friday evening, September 24th, 2021, would be the last night our family would be complete. We laughed together, played games, sang, and enjoyed listening as our 16-year-old son, Ethan, played the piano for us. I packed a lunch for Ethan for a church mountain hike he was going on the following day.
      My mother (who was visiting from out of state) and I woke early with Ethan on Saturday morning. He hugged me and smiled, never pulling away or rushing me. He got in the car, waved, said he'd see me later and he loved me. It was hard to watch my "new driver" heading out on his own that morning. As Ethan pulled out of the gate, I turned to my mother and said, "It's just so hard letting go." Little did I know how much "letting go" I was really doing. That was the last time I saw Ethan. He did not make it home that evening.
      That afternoon, a friend tried to contact my husband, leaving an urgent message to call him back. He tried several times to return the call to no avail. As we were preparing supper, an overwhelming feeling of deep concern for Ethan filled my heart. I quietly blinked back tears. I glanced out the window, half expecting to see a police officer pull up to the house, but no one arrived. However, within a few minutes, a patrol car DID pull into the driveway. In my heart, I feared the worst. My husband and I went out to meet the officer, who confirmed our fears. Hesitantly, he told us our son had fallen off of
      a bluff and had succumbed to his injuries. Our hearts were crushed; they still are.
      Yet, in all of our brokenness, deep, continual grief and loneliness, our family has such a blessed Hope and assurance that we will see our dear son and brother again. You see, when Ethan was a young boy, he was saved; he put his faith in Jesus alone to forgive his sins and to take him to Heaven when he died. He realized some very important truths from the Bible that he would want to share with you.
      His Story
      Everyone is a sinner. Sin is any violation of God’s Law. God is holy, just and righteous, and He cannot allow sin in His presence. Ethan realized that he - like all of us - had sinned; and his sin separated Him from God.
      “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; ” (Romans 3:23)
      “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” (Romans 5:12)
      He understood that, because of his sin, he deserved to spend eternity in Hell.
      “For the wages of sin is death;” (Romans 6:23a) [Wages: price]
      “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8)
      Ethan believed that Jesus, God’s Son, paid the price for all sin when He died on the cross - because His sinless sacrifice was the only thing that could satisfy the just demands of a righteous, holy God. Jesus was buried in a borrowed tomb, but He arose the third day, triumphant over sin, death, and Hell. Jesus is alive today!
      “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
      “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9)
      Ethan was sorry for his sin, repented (turned), and received by faith the free gift that God offered to him.
      “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
      “...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23b)
      Because of this great salvation, Ethan lived his life serving Jesus. He worked hard to spread this Good News to the world. He is alive in Heaven with Jesus today; and because of this great HOPE in Christ, we know we will see him again soon - not because he was a great kid, but because of his faith in the great Saviour!
      “And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.” (John 10:28)
      Your Story
      What about you? What if you had fallen to your death that day - What if you were to die today? Where will you spend eternity - Heaven or the Lake of Fire? There will not be any parties in the Lake of Fire. It is a place of eternal torment for those who reject God's Son.
      The Word of God is very clear that there is only One Way to Heaven.
      “Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)
      We did not know that Ethan would step into eternity that day; however, because he put his faith in Jesus alone for his salvation, Ethan was ready to go. Some day - perhaps today - you will take your last breath here on earth, and you will step into eternity. Where you spend eternity is determined by what you do with Jesus Christ. Will you accept Him or reject Him? You are not promised another day or another breath. Eternity begins soon - Are you ready?
      “...Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved…” (Acts 16:31b)
      “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
      “(...behold, now is the day of salvation.)” (2 Corinthians 6:2c)
      ******************************
      This testimony has been made into a tract form as well, so if you or your church are interested in having them to pass out, please go to libertyfaith.net and you will find our contact info there. God bless!
      Tribute to Ethan Lakey
      ua-cam.com/video/EhobcQZ6Qb8/v-deo.html

    • @richardbradshaw7830
      @richardbradshaw7830 Рік тому

      @@marie2721 Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹️and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday..

    • @richardbradshaw7830
      @richardbradshaw7830 Рік тому

      Well am really sorry about that okay 😒☹️and I know how it feels to be lonely without our love ones, we've all lost our love ones in death one way or the other, either a spouse, child, family members, or a true friend that meant the world to us, such is life I understand how you feel but life must move on because death is inevitable no matter how hard we try! And we'll all have to face it someday..

  • @TJ-kk5zf
    @TJ-kk5zf 4 роки тому +3

    her laughter is really awkward

    • @Dman9fp
      @Dman9fp 4 роки тому

      Most all people surrounded in death constantly for their jobs are awkward imo, as who's to say whether it's a product from being in or a soft pre-requisite of the job, idk