How suppressing our emotions & physiology can lead to depression
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- Опубліковано 31 жов 2020
- I LOVED recording this latest vlog for you, because it tied in many different topics (plus I got to read a passage from one of my favourite books!). Today I dive into topics like the importance of expressing physical pain at the visceral and primal animal levels. I also talk about the traumatic consequences of being forced to do things that we don’t want to do as a result of our current medical models, and I use what my mentors have called ‘the medicalization of birth’ as one prime example (this is where that favourite book comes in). Plus, I get into how darn important it is to express our life force energy and healthy aggressions so we don’t suppress our physiology, which when left suppressed and stored up internally can lead to what we term ‘depression,’ and in today’s special case, something all too common in ‘civilized’ society, postpartum depression.
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Resources I mention during this video:
► BOOK: Travels by Michael Crichton:
/ 7665.travels
► The Stiff Upper Lip Phenomenon & Healing Our Humanity
irenelyon.com/2020/10/04/the-...
► Functional Freeze Explained:
irenelyon.com/2020/07/12/func...
► Somatic Experiencing work of Peter Levine:
www.somaticexperiencing.com
► Gabor Maté’s work, in reference to anger and dis-ease:
drgabormate.com/preview/when-...
► Long-form Q&A:
• Q&A Chat with Irene Ly...
► Special Topic Lecture:
• ANGER AS MEDICINE (Spe...
► Article:
irenelyon.com/2016/08/23/ange...
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Thank you for being here!
1. Leave a comment and let me know how this video impacted you. Feel free to leave a question (my team answers them each week!)
2. To get more nervous system health resources, plus learn more about me and my credentials, plus the many ways you can work with me at the practical level, head to my website: irenelyon.com
3. Follow me on social here:
Instagram: / irenelyon
Facebook: / lyonirene
LinkedIn: / irenelyon
SoundCloud: / irenelyon
4. GOT QUESTIONS? Send an email to: support@irenelyon.com
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Please know that…
The statements on this UA-cam channel or in videos are simply opinion. Content presented or posted on this channel is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment or a professional therapeutic relationship. Content presented or posted is intended to provide general health information for educational purposes only and you should contact the appropriate healthcare professional before relying on any such information.
My website is a wealth of free resources and information on how to start this work, so here it is one more time: irenelyon.com
Thank you for this Irene. I had a NDE during my son's birth and the energy was trapped for over 15 years. I was strapped on the bed and later I realised that I had undiagnosed perinatal trauma as it felt like obstetric rape which led to the shut down. When I was ready to renegotiate the trauma, I was lying down on my front and my legs started to run and run and run. It was a primal and incredible release. I still have no idea how this experience has truly affected my son's nervous system. Only time will tell. Still feels like divine intervention that we are still both here. I did write to the hospital many years later (it was known locally to be a c-section hospital so not very prepared for vaginal deliveries) to share my story and to ask them what had changed. You can imagine the response. I really appreciate your work and what you share.
Maternal abuse is a very real and deliberate thing, I hope you’re doing well now ❤
@Elle Thank you. I am. I feel it is all part of the disavowing of women and the sacredness of birth in Western culture. So many women, like me, dissociate and then the trauma rises again to be felt and met at menopause.
My environment still does not allow me to safely express emotions. I am working hard to change it, move out on my own, but there is so much environmental kick back and resistance.
I realised decades ago that my shoulders and legs were painful because when my father was screaming at me, and any normal child would've raised their arms to protect their heads, or run away, if I'd tried either his violence would've escalated. So I must've tried either when I was very small. And now I find that all I need to do is pay attention to the tiny clues that tell me, now for example, that I'm feeling uncomfortable because I need to give myself a good wash and change my clothes ... ain't life grand! Thank you so much for your videos, Irene. If only the internet had arrived a bit earlier - but now other children can find out, yeah?? xxx
Terrible abuse that women go through ! So sorry to hear ! I was born into a family of women whom were terrified of childbirth -
Migraine headaches and extreme jaw tension holding - ( which I have always had - and @ 69 , several of my teeth have disintegrated in a very intensely stressful period ) seem to be connected to intense emotional expressions beginning @ birth - NOT ALLOWED or Punished !
This was the most helpful video I’ve seen so far in all your videos Irene , just so affirming to go with my gut impulses!! Thank you Irene!
If you are pregnant and watching this ... content warning for the first half, it’s pretty intense about lack of human rights in hospital practices, but don’t stop! Either watch to the end or skip to half way through where Irene gets to Debbie in the young unwed girls room. Your body is like Debbie! You can do it! I believe in you and I believe in your body. You can do it. I’ve done it. If you’re listening to Irene you’re in the right place. Hire a doula if you can. You are a powerful mammal animal and you can do it. Love to you mama 💕
Just what I need to hear. Thank you.
Thank you for this video. My emotions have been suppressed for a long time due to childhood emotional neglect and later in anti depressants. Nowadays I have this lump in my throat which makes me feel I can cry all day. For the past years I give myself permission to cry but I am so tired and its making me anxious to all the grieve that is stored up. How do I deal with this? Cry all day?
Thank you for the insights I am getting by your videos which I am following now for a couple of months. I am 53, and stored trauma is getting out, but it is so overwhelming.
I understand how you feel I had that lump for years and thought it was a medical issue. I’ve dealt with some of my trauma and it’s has been gone for years now. I actually just these last few years realized that lump was from anxiety and not speaking up for myself.
Go steady & you will process. Much luck with your journey
@@hearme4581 thank you Simone, I know it is because of anxiety and by not having expressed my feelings and emotions for a long long time. It is all coming out now...what a journey! Your answer gives me hope😊. Thank you.
@@cherylwilsherlimberlife7210 Thank you Cheryl
Hi Hanneke den Hartog, Jen here from Team Lyon. It's great to hear that you're gleaning insights from watching Irene's video!
I can't say for sure what's happening with your sadness and throat, and if we've had early and/or developmental trauma feeling longstanding grief can often be part of the healing process. It can also be important to differentiate this from getting stuck in an trauma loop, which can also happen when we've had trauma.
Either way, pendulating with resources or cues of support or safety in your body and/or environment can be supportive - touching in to the sadness and sensation in your throat and touching out again. Irene's programs have also helped many of us. I'll link to her introductory program and a resource that might be of interest in case you want to check either out.
always
21daytuneup.com
irenelyon.com/2020/03/29/pendulation-how-to-shift-focus-to-calm-overwhelm/
You're the real deal... appreciate you!
Great, very enriching information!
Hey Irene, thank you so much for your content. I am really resonating with most of it.
I would however like to make a comment slightly off topic about the trauma and somatic effects of adoption for both the birth mother and the baby. I actually came to your channel as an adoptee finally recognizing the deep wound left by this experience. As much as I respect your work (and I really really do) its hard to hear a birthmothers post partum experience be minimized as simply "sadness" as most people do not know what an understatement that is, and even less so for the relinquished child. Again, I appreciate your work so much! Just wanted to say something in advocacy for adoptees and birthmothers out there.
Hi Reneé Hérbert, Jen here from Team Lyon. Great to hear that Irene's work is resonating with you for the most part. Thanks for your sharing about your experience here. In general I find that words can often fall short when it comes to capturing the depth of human experience, this can be particularly true when it comes to major losses. I can hear how the word "sadness" would not come close to the capturing the depth of the loss and grief experienced related to the experience of adoption.
Irene does differentiate between "nutritive" and "biological" sadness. I realize this doesn't address the that the world falls short of representing the depth of experience, and I'll link to an article she wrote about it here in case it's of interest to you.
irenelyon.com/2020/11/25/how-to-deal-with-sadness-2/
This is so real for me, thank you irene. Starting to un numb & allow my self to feel & express. Need to let my parents off the hook been mad at them for too long. & I see that it's culture
I gave birth to 4 children. The 1st 2 were birthed completely natural, the last 2, I needed help because my sacrum/pelvis had been injured in a car accident and I just couldn't...I've always wondered how my grunting/yelling affected my poor babies! I know I was incredibly loud and even though I was embarrassed, I couldn't hold it in!
Hey Irene - I recently found you & have loved going through your channel. I can't ever seem to find info on trauma that happened as an adult - not in childhood. It was from an accident, so there was some medical trauma, but really the bigger part was after I was hit by a car (I was walking) - I had to close my retail store I owned for 25 years, lost my income & have spent the last several years moving several times through financial struggles & trying to rebuild my business while the legal system is figuring out that part. But I find myself constantly going into "freeze" which makes it impossible to be productive, then I beat myself up for not doing more. I didn't mean to ramble, I just really struggle to find any info about traumas we go through as adults - I'm 50 years old! I believe in higher purposes and I am in the constant hunt for the bigger reason, how I can contribute & help others through this experience - but I first have to heal myself!! Love from Seattle! ~Viki
Hey there Viki, Seth here from Team Lyon. Thanks for watching and commenting! When we go into this somatic approach to healing trauma, it really doesn't matter too much when or what the circumstances around the trauma are, though sustained early/developmental trauma and chronic stress need to be approached a bit differently than a simple shock trauma. Oftentimes, a trauma in adult life will 'unpack' old trauma from our childhood we may not even know we had! I recommend checking out Irene's free Healing Trauma video series. It's three videos that gets into the different kinds of trauma in detail... irenelyon.com/healing-trauma
Love the thumbnail image thing to this!! 😂😂😆 ...You should do one for every video 🤣😉 ... Seriously though: hilarious! And ironically light hearted. ☺️ Am very interested to listen to this. Saving it as well.
Great explanation...
Thank you 🙏🏻 ❤
Thank you Irene.
Does it make sense that the freeze type behaviours themselves were thwarted through shaming, and so they got stuck similar to a thwarted procedural action?
I seem to have a big problem with fear of the freeze response and associated behaviours. I sense that I need to become less afraid of freeze sensations first, or let them ‘play out’ and complete with acceptance before actively trying to emerge from freeze via movement/ orienting/ grounding etc? Any thoughts? ❤️
Hi Alex Polidori, Jen here from Team Lyon. I'm not sure I completely understand your question and will share a few related thoughts. If we're under threat, our first line of defense is social engagement. If that's not available, we turn to fight or flight. When we are shamed, we often go into collapse (freeze) and these more active defensive responses don't get a chance to mobilize yet they are still there waiting to express when the freeze lifts. This is why we typically want to come out of freeze slowly - there can be a lot of energy under there!
Emerging from freeze can take time, especially if it's a long term pattern. It's often advisable to participate in a program such as the ones Irene offers or to work with a practitioner to do so, and key elements include growing safety and capacity in the nervous system (including in some of the ways you named), inviting gentle movement into the system, and bringing curiosity to the felt sense of being in freeze.
Very interesting thanks! Do you have any videos or resources about how the jaw is connected to the rest of the body? I believe alot of my past truama is held in my jaw, and I'm using feldenkrais movement as one of the ways to release it
I also have so much stored in my jaw. I have wondered if it is partly because I don't feel comfortable sharing my voice/setting boundaries/etc. I'm curious, too!
Hi Oak Tree 2222, Jen here from Team Lyon. I don't believe Irene has videos about this specifically, and growing nervous system regulation often helps with jaw tension. Healthy aggression work in particular is often helpful as jaw tension in many instances is connected to unexpressed healthy aggression.
ua-cam.com/video/tqGsbFjihHo/v-deo.html
@@teamlyon3109 thanks for the link 😊
@@katepearlzorn7275 I have similar feelings, I've been working on voicing my opinions and boundary setting too instead of surpressing myself like when I was growing up, I've found singing helpful ☀️
she just released a video about this a few weeks ago!
I read that book in 1994 and loved it!
Irene, your hair looks amazingly healthy. Are you doing anhthing specific to receive such great results?
Looks natural, no bleach or dye.
Hey Love n Light, Seth here from Team Lyon. Nope, she just washes and conditions :) and Peace Seeker is correct, no dyes.
This is really interesting, thank you again Irene for clarifying all of this. So what about surgeries where you’re put under general anaesthetic? Your conscious mind is knocked off but what about the subconscious? Does the body remember the surgery? And with that remember it’s powerlessness to protect itself from a foreign invasion and hence a trauma?? I’ve had two surgeries over the years; one when I was 7yrs old for a tonsillectomy which my parents still to this day say I am a completely different child after that, withdrawn, shutdown, lost my light and joy. I remember being told I would be asleep for the procedure and being a child and without extra detail, I assumed it was normal “sleep” as I already had known of. That I would drift off naturally and have dreams. I was completely traumatised that the doctor actually forced me to “sleep” and that it felt more like I was switched off, like a black out, and had no dreams. I felt completely disoriented by the whole experience and haven’t been the same since. That was a psychological trauma I suppose but would my body have stored the threat of someone cutting something in my throat and not being able to defend itself?
And when I was 20yrs old for spinal fusion where my spine was broken, taken apart and realigned as best they could with metalwork added. Still to this day I feel absolute terror from behind me all the time to varying degrees depending on how regulated I am. I don’t feel safe unless I’m completely alone in a room with all the doors closed. I can’t stand not being able to see or hear what’s going on behind me. So even when noise cancellation headphones and music earbuds work for helping reduce overstimulation for people on the spectrum, (I’m also on the spectrum) I can’t use them cuz my ears are like my radar and I don’t feel safe if I can’t hear what’s going on in the places around and behind me that I can’t see.
I’ve believed in the principle of consciously moving through pain for years now. I won’t even take a local anaesthetic for a tooth filling. Ridiculous! Fillings don’t even hurt. What I struggle with the most though is that I live with chronic pain. I can move through pain if I know I’m gona come out the other end, but when it’s ongoing and chronic it’s really hard to stay conscious with it when it eventually wears down your nervous system and mental health. And the low mental health adds to the pain and it becomes a vicious circle. But I don’t like to numb it either because then the unprocessed pain causes more chaos in my system. It seems like a no-win situation. Any thoughts on this and my above question about unconscious surgeries? Thanks!
Hi Sonya, Seth here from Team Lyon. Thanks so much for being here and for your questions. You asked... 'So what about surgeries where you’re put under general anaesthetic? Your conscious mind is knocked off but what about the subconscious? Does the body remember the surgery? And with that remember it’s powerlessness to protect itself from a foreign invasion and hence a trauma??' - the answer is yes! The body and subconscious still experiences the surgery and will be sending out the impulses to protect, which cannot be carried out at the time.
And yes, chronic pain with no end in sight is very different than a short-term pain that we know will come to an end. It sounds like, given your experiences, you would really benefit from some good somatic trauma work, either with a practitioner who knows how to work with surgical trauma, or by starting one of Irene's programs. I'll put links to those things below. I wish you so much grace and healing on your journey!
How to find a good somatic practitioner - ua-cam.com/video/04XF7ANnqGk/v-deo.html
Irene's programs - irenelyon.com/programs/
@@teamlyon3109 thank you I appreciate your reply and help. I’m on disability and struggling so I can’t afford any courses but thank god my country has a free counselling service and I’m currently working with a trauma therapist who does somatic experiencing with me. She is not specialised in surgical trauma unfortunately but it’s better than nothing! Irene’s free material is so valuable to me too so I thank you all so much! 🙏🏻
hello guys, how can I know when is there another online stream?
thanks for video : )
Hey Mirek - best way to follow and keep up to date is to first join my email list as I send out notices when I have new videos and livestreams. Also, Subscribe to this channel! You can join my email via my site: www.irenelyon.com
Irene, I’ve looked for the podcast version but I can’t find it anywhere. Is it out yet?
Hi Rick Rowan, Jen here from Team Lyon. Irene hasn't released a podcast yet.
@@teamlyon3109 Ok that would explain why I couldn’t find it! Thanks! 🙏
Hello Irene, thank you very much for this useful topic!
I would have a comment ... I suppose it doesn't always (as in truly always) count as something bad to suppress our emotions if we do it willingly and that willingness is genuine from the depth of us = in sync with us ... right?... Because I can imagine many situations where it is actually also good to train our bodies, our strength and endurance we might want willingly also go sometimes cross our borders and suppress some of our emotions to use them "better way" = e.g. work with them willingly to manage them to go "out" different way than as they would want to (?)
Specific example connected to the topic you introduced - giving a birth. When I was giving birth to my first child I was for a short time also on epidural medication which then slowly stopped working (as it is supposed to so you can cooperate on pushing your child out) and when I was pushing the baby out I was already fully feeling the pain which made me scream. At that point I was also gently advised to suppress my screaming during the next weave and put all my breath rather than to the screaming (breath out) to the pushing (breath down to the diaphragm). Thanks to that my son's head was pushed out with the next contraction and the rest was really easy... I even didn't feel it as anything bad, there were my husband holding me from the left side and my good friend holding me from the right side. I didn't feel anything wrong and I believe that it was screaming suppression which was fully "in agreement" with me (accepted) and supported by me and I believe such kind of conscious transformation of your emotion should be ok with no future trauma, I believe. Although... it was really a huge test of my self-discipline at that moment to be honest, but I felt even proud on myself :)
I can also imagine men who train themselves in order to strengthen their body endurance to work with some kind of intended emotion suppression which they might want to transform and use for different purpose... I have already heard about anger being positively transformed into some productive activity or sport...
Could you confirm or explain please, if I do understand it correctly that not all "suppressed" emotion is harmful.
Thank you very much :)
Hi CrystallineSoll, Jen here from Team Lyon. Interesting question! I'll touch on some key points. Yes, for sure, sometimes we will consciously choose to not feel an emotion or to channel it in a different direction. What can be important here is the acknowledgement of what's happening and that we are making a choice.
For example, if I'm in a work meeting and start to feel very sad, I might say to myself I hear you, I feel this sadness, and let's (gently) hold it inside until I'm able to create some time and space to feel it later. They key is to check back in with ourselves when we have the chance to do so - the sadness (for example) may have passed, or it may still be there, waiting to the opportunity to move through. I don't think of this as suppression as we're in relationship to what's happening and giving it the space to express if needed.
I do want to differentiate some forms of "channeling emotions" into activity from the work of growing nervous system regulation. Many people who have a lot of activation in their nervous system might channel it into exercise (another example).
This might help them to feel better temporarily as they give the energy an outlet and because of the benefits of exercise, but this is not the same as growing nervous system regulation. It could be the same for power lifting - if someone channels their anger into lifting, it may be more constructive than yelling at someone for sure, and again it typically won't grow foundational nervous system regulation. Hope this helps to clarify a few things!
@@teamlyon3109, hello, yes, it definitely provides some additional interesting views. Thank you very much! :)
I have seen intuitive dancing encouraged by therapists to reduce trauma stored in the body, does this work?
Hi Kate Pearl, Jen here from Team Lyon. Every person and nervous system is unique, so if you're drawn to a practice the best bet is often try it out and see how it feels to you. That said, it can be important to distinguish between practices that help us to discharge energy, connect more deeply with our bodies and ourselves, etc. and those that grow nervous system regulation. There is often overlap and they are not one and the same.
this is great info and all but what can one do when they still live with parentals who tell you you have no right to express your emotions cuz you're being provided for? I'm in my 40s (shame already for not being able to provide for myself n told how I'm keeping the parentals from enjoying their lives). I can't yell or hit things to express my anger n frustration cuz I'll get shamed or belittled n told to stop or get kicked out. I no longer have a garden to tend to cuz we moved into an apartment nor a punching bag cuz she didn't want it hanging in my room nor on her porch. I only have distractions available n all it had done was increase everything to where I get panic attacks n depression near every day. i find sources such as your videos but I don't have money to get into any programs. I've tried screaming into pillows when they are out at rare times but by then I'm either exhausted or thinking there's no point by then. I can't even express my anger n frustrations with a close friend cuz I'm conditioned to believe it's so wrong that i can't even start to try. I don't know if that's shame I feel or embarrassment. i just want to no longer live so this mind can finally stop spinning but I'm too cowardly to do anything n told how ill just go to hell n be tormented forever if I do. I've tried the suicide hotline twice but even they felt so uncomfortable to my crying n unloading, they kept wanting to hand me over to another which had me feel far worse about myself. so I'm the one who is terrible that no one wants to be my friend. no one wants to deal with me, not even myself. I hate myself so much cuz no one else except one person has showed me that I have any worth yet it's not convinced me to love myself.
sigh
at least you guys are figuring out your lives n have support from others.
HI hairkyoki, Jen here from Team Lyon. Good to hear that you found Irene's video here helpful. And yes, working to heal when we're living with the same family system that contributed to the development of trauma in the first place can be very challenging - you are definitely not alone in that experience. I'll share a few ideas here for things you can try.
- keep watching and learning here and where you can find things that speak to you, and generally finding things that grow your awareness that you CAN heal
- give yourself permission to feel your emotions and find ways to express them that are doable in your current situation, regardless of what your parents say or do (I realize this can mean finding ways to do it on your own). With anger and frustration, what we call healthy aggression, sometimes we just need to let it out and doing so (screaming into a pillow) doesn't typically support trauma resolution or help to grow nervous system regulation. I'll link to two resources of Irene's that might be supportive here.
- if you don't feel comfortable expressing in these ways with your friends, consider finding a "buddy" to do this work with, perhaps in an online group for forum related to healing
- take advantage of Irene's free resources. I'll link to them here too.
- I hear and respect that don't have the resources to invest in online programs, and if it's feasible, Irene's drop in classes can be a way to experience her teaching "live" while being in a healing field with others interested in the work. You also get the recording so it's something you can do on your own too.
Hope you find something supportive here.
Empower Yourself Resource Your Healthy Aggression: medium.com/@irenelyon/empower-yourself-restore-your-healthy-aggression-7bd02a273550
How to work with anger in a healthy way: ua-cam.com/video/4wdeBJ39Cuw/v-deo.html
Drop in class: irenelyon.com/drop-in-class-1
Free resource centre: irenelyon.com/free-resources-2/
Actually it would be great if there is a list of books you recommend through your videos. I read better than watching videos, it feels calmer and more self driven.
Hello, Sophia from Team Lyon here. Irene has put out a couple of blogs on books she recommends, they might be of help to you:
irenelyon.com/2011/01/23/a-bakers-top-ten-booklist-handpicked-books-id-call-art/
irenelyon.com/2020/05/17/books-i-love-plus-an-open-heart-surgery-analogy/
When did that scopaline (?) misuse occur?
Hi T Duston, Seth here from Team Lyon. I don't have the book in front of me so I'm not sure of the exact date, but it was in the 1960's.
thank you, super interesting! screams need to get out, so true. maybe a strange question comes up: I am in love and since some months have a wonderful fulfilling sex life. my neighbor rang on my door the other day to tell me that his sleeping-room is next to mine and he can't stand those sex sounds any more. so now me and my partner feel uncomfortable and "listened to". so automatically we hold back which is actually making me sad and angry. what to do about society's problems with human/animal sounds? like with giving birth I think it is natural to scream and make noises when you are in pleasure. how could holding back harm me? how can I get out those energies anyway?
Hi there, Seth here from Team Lyon. Holding back your natural sounds, in any circumstance, is going to feel repressive, and can lead to diminished life energy and joy. Frankly, I think the thing to do with society's problem with mammalian sounds is to say, 'screw them!'. That being said, it's good to be respectful of a neighbour when it comes to any kind of noise, so I suggest a middle ground. Tell your neighbour that you will not engage in loud sex after a certain hour - whatever the quiet hours are in your neighbourhood, and the rest of the time have at it! If he can't deal with it when he's not trying to sleep then that's his problem. If you and your partner want to have sex after 'quiet hours', then hey, other parts of the house can be fun :) Another idea is to move your bed so it's against a different wall, or put in sound proofing on the problem wall.
How do we reverse the many years of suppressed emotions?
Hi D K, Jen here from Irene's Team. The work that Irene teaches is very effective at allowing us to release suppressed emotions and more from our bodies. If you haven't already seen the free Healing Trauma video series. I'd recommend giving it a watch.
irenelyon.com/healing-trauma
@@teamlyon3109 Thank you, I'll watch the videos.
Unfortunately, however, depending on what happened to them afterwards, the babies born to the pregnant teenagers could have ended up with their own trauma-related difficulties.
Do you work with combat veterans?
Hi Pablo Ravizzoli, Jen here from Team Lyon. There are some vets in Irene's programs, and many Somatic Experiencing Practitioners (SEPs) do work with vets. There's an online video where Peter Levine, the founder of Somatic Experiencing, works with a vet named Ray. I'd recommend checking it out if this is an area of interest for you.
www.somaticexperiencing.com/rays-story
@@teamlyon3109 thank you!!
That Crichton story is horrific.
Re meddling, empathy gap, atrocious (not merely absent) bedside manners, shame:
Briefly, an old classic “People Will Talk (1951-Cary Grant & Jeanne Craine)” about a Dr. Praetorius and an out of wedlock mother (he’ll fix that too but bear with me). Nurse: “She knew what she was doing; she’ll take what’s coming to her.” Dr. Praetorius: “I never want to hear you say anything as idiotic and heartless as that again. For one thing, you’re a nurse. For another, you’re a woman. I’m ashamed of both of you.”
Well, I’ve never been pregnant ("t" stands for Tim). But my right leg had to be sliced open for emergency surgery after a slip on black ice while acknowledging a passing student (so it was worth it, and I’d do it again) and oddly but par for the course of those who were traumatized early, I experienced shame for inadvertently busting my leg (as before, after an inadvertent slip in 2nd grade, because I’d be noticed and get in trouble, as at home, and even earlier and always (so I can’t say there wasn’t consistency). Procedural memory?
Emergency surgery at a Sacred Heart hospital (what’s in a name anyway). The surgeon explained that the anesthesiologist delayed me 24 hours asserting that because 5 hours earlier I’d consumed a tablespoon of instant powdered milk in my tea (nothing else that day of vigorous work) and so much food would create a risk. I replied, “You KNOW that’s policy talking (not medicine)”. The surgeon hid his face recognizing the absurdity he was helpless to correct.
Well, said anesthesiologist was reticent concerning the sedation. Said some people just had dreams or wouldn’t remember, said he. Surgery: dream during procedure, handling, prodding, voices, slicing, something wet running all over, and an expressive image of the pink flesh of a whopping salmon as its skin was slit stem to stern. Post-surgery: Tim (relates said dream to said anesthesiologist). Anesthesiologist (who told me people dreamed, now said with ridicule and disgust): “Oh, weird!”
Post-surgical handling and planned treatment was worse. Bedside manners belonged in a bedpan, not a hospital. I know bones and muscle, how they best heal to prevent loss and restore for pre-surgery performance. So, a friend arrived and kept the engine running (his reward in the sweet bye & bye will be great). Without Rx, I fully recovered in record time (the pain was inexpressible, I admit, but saved more in the long run).
Again, Praetorius, who initially was a licensed M.D. and began with a butcher shop while practicing medicine to raise money for a compassionate humane and effective clinic of his own, responding at a board hearing motivated by envy, and criticized for giving the impression that he was a butcher and not a doctor: “Do you prefer I give the impression given by so many of our esteemed colleagues, that they are doctors and not butchers?”
Touché Irene-again my comments and experience concerning each moment of this video would be to say to others “...what she said...”.