Its all because of effort. Effort is the key. When both parties lack it there will be no success. Unfortunately its happened to all of us. Maybe someday you’ll find someone who gives you the same effort you give them.
People are trash these days no matter what color they are ……and role reversal. The women want to be the alpha and the men are feminine. Meaning men want women to chase them ……………real talk
I’m ignoring him because he literally thinks it’s okay to talk to me when it’s convenient for him or “when he has time” . Guess what? I’m going to text him when I have time aka never 👸🏽
I am ignoring right now because every time I pay attention I wait for days to hear something back. This time I am not waiting, I learned my lesson and I've had enough.
Mildred Gardner That kind of behavior would leave me with the very fundamental doubt about his love which hangs over like a shadow even if the relationship were to continue. Good for you to call his bluff and remove the aggravation. Mature relationships are better and worth the wait.
@Me, myself, and I this happened to me with my recent EX. We were still "friends" after the break up and his life was spiraling down as in he lost his job(s) and his home. He started reaching out to me more frequent but I kept turning him down cause I've already moved on. He wasn't aware of this and asked me out on Vday. Then he asked, "so I shouldn't get emotionally involved with you?" I said, "uh no Sorry I just don't feel that way about you anymore". It wasn't devastating for me to tell him how I felt because all I could remember is how he treated me in the end of our relationship and he also wasn't a good friend when we still kept in touch after we broke up. I'll admit one thing I think being his friend in the end helped me actually move on cause I was so caught up in my old feelings for him that I couldn't see who he really was in my heart. He wasn't caring and was very selfish. So it opened up my eyes and made it easier for me to let him go. Hate to say it took about 2 yrs later after our break up to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But it happened...
I love it!! I agree!! Though, I'm not going to "ignore" him. I'm just going to live my life 100%, without giving any thought about how he feels about me. Happiness on my own terms. If he's worth MY time just maybe he can come with me. But I'm at the point, that I really don't care.
One thing about a smart woman men do not get: women give all of themselves. So when they run out of giving a shit, it’s OVER. Forever. No going back. So be careful guys. There is a limit and then you’re in the Twilight Zone.
When men run out of giving a shit, it's over too, permanently. We have our limits, and when women cross our limits, some of us go MGTOW. From what I have seen since my divorce, I am merely missing a category 6 hurricane of troubles. And yes, I walked out on her because she was involved with drugs behind my back.
@@jameswatsonatheistgamer there's also a lot of men out there. It's quite easy for women to get laid any night of the week than for a guy. Now real relationships of substance are a whole other issue.
Whatever energy you give me I will give that back and it’s not to play games at all. I treat people how they treat me. I will never allow a guy to control my emotions period.
Chenal Attwood I hate it when the dating coaches make it out to be like it’s always the woman’s fault and men are just wired to always “wander” bc a female did something to “trigger” him to have second thoughts. Men need to put in the same effort as women are expected to do as well. It’s like in this generation it’s our job as women to do all the work and chasing while the men just sit back and pick and choose which girl they like better.
@@Poison_Ivy22 You can't choose who to be attracted to. You call putting make up and putting a nice dress on putting effort? Lol not even close. Things have changed. Men are always the risk takers and I never seen a girl asking a guy out on a date. I always see guys ask woman out on dates and get rejected. When are girls gonna start asking guys they like out and taking a risk? Too painful if you get rejected right? Well men deal with that every single day and some are getting tired of it. We have feelings too. I've had girls give me the signals that they like me but when I ask them out on a date they say maybe or leave me hanging the next day. I don't have time for games and that's all girls like to play. Mind games. But guess what? I have better things to do.
Kenny z You clearly didn’t understand my comment but instead made up a completely different story in your head. I NEVER said anything about men being assholes for rejecting women, you’re entitled to be with who you want to be with, my comment was how I think it’s bullshit for how whenever a man talks to a woman now and leads her on telling her he wants to be with her then POOF he ghosts her and a lot of times he’ll come back around just to lead her on some more to have that satisfaction to see if he can still have her, I know bc I’ve seen this too many times. Both genders do it, yes. You are correct. But what I don’t like now is how dating coaches and people in general always somehow now make the dudes actions the woman’s fault bc she must have “said” or “did” something to “trigger” him to “run”.. like wtf last time I checked 2 wrongs don’t make a right! You said it yourself how it’s bullshit how women been doing this shit for years so what makes you think it’s okay for men to do the same thing? Looks like you’re excusing Men bc now it’s y’alls turn, right? Lol If a guy doesn’t like the girl, guys usually know from the beginning if he sees a future with the girl or not so if you all know you don’t want to be with the girl then why continue to lead her on just to get what you want out of it then drop her and ghost her bc you grew bored and call the girl crazy just bc you got her to grow feelings for you? Not only that but try to keep her on the side just in case if you might need a “back up” later? I don’t miss the single life one bit bc in this generation both men and women play too many games, y’all don’t know what it means to be in a relationship anymore and that’s why a lot of couples don’t last longer than maybe 3 years if you’re lucky. No one gets what it means to be in a relationship anymore, it’s hard to be in a relationship when you’re keeping 1 foot out to see what else might be out there when you promised a commitment with a person already, huh? Lol Everyone just wants to have their cake and eat it now to.
@Faeries_Xylia 923 Here's a virtual high five!!!! THIS is exactly what I've noticed in our generation and this is exactly what people do! You're absolutely spot on. Seriously, I wish I could like this comment a 100 times!!!
I've done this to a guy, only because he showed interest in me one day then act cold and distant towards me the next and it honestly made me not want to even bother with him.🤷♀️
Im going through that right now. He said he saw me once on train station and was searching me for 6 months to know who I am and he found my on facebook. He said he is in love with me. Even after one date we had he accidentaly saw me again near train station and he stood still forgot where he was going. He send me a text that day It was nice to see you. When I saw you I forgot where I was going cuz your so beautifull. I was laughing cuz I rhink he is in love with me but he is so insecure cuz once I texted him and he was so cold to me and ignoring me my text. Now I didn reach out for him about a month and he now is texting like crazy like how are you and what are you doing. Now Im ignoring him and he is now ok what is happening. Lol. I think he likesto play games and I dont. Im makeing him sweat now but Im still like ok and happy. If I see him again in town I will be like its nothong wrong between us.
You ignore me...I ignore you & pull away EVEN if I really like him...it’ll hurt but the hurt is worth it now than being in an unwanted relationship later
Yah it’s your ego. The bigger your ego is the more you’ll sacrifice to not have your ego hurt. But deep down you know wassup tho. deep down is where the truth lies.
Basic law of attraction, "Flee (ignore) and they will follow, Follow and they will Flee!" works everytime on every type of men. Another law of basic attraction, "You always want what you can't have"
Patches Michelle Yup. Guys put it in their heads that once they have the girl that she’ll always want him not realizing how many more options we do have waiting for us, they think they can treat the girl like crap and think she’ll always be there. If you don’t feed the animal it dies, well if you don’t give the girl the attention that she needs she’ll eventually find another man who will and she’ll forget all about you. Everyone moves on if you stay away long enough
@@darquequeen2323 I've heard tons of guys say this, actually he's helping in this response. Shows how desperate women are the warped psychology that women have when it comes to men, it's a weird law of attraction. But I agree, it's not fair to us.
Hist Ory trust me hun that will only work for so long before the girl comes to her senses and is over it. It happened to me too, the more the guy ignored me the more I wanted him to talk to me but once I had enough I was done and moved on, they try coming back once they see I’m over them but I never let them back in bc I moved on already.
I ignore him because I want nothing to do with him anymore. He took me for granted and he didn't think a second I would do that. That's how life goes when you are willing to walk away. He tries to re-engage with me. Why? He misses having access to me.
Actually I've had them all come back saying they messed up and made the biggest mistake of their lives. So it's not always physical! I think something just clicks in their heads because they are either focused on career or immature at the time and trying to search for better options etc.
By ignoring him I just don’t text first. I always let him initiate contact. This is why men always have the power, it’s up to them, if they want to contact you. There’s no point in developing feelings for men because they get to decide if they like you and they get to decide when they stop liking you and lose interest. He’ll decide that he likes you, makes you get interested in him then change his mind. There’s no point in liking guys because he will change his mind. Even in a relationship he will up and change his mind. There’s no point to love, because it all depends on the man’s feelings.
And when he found someone attractive in his eyes either they gonna stick around with you or cheat and try his chances to that other woman and when he gets busted he’s so quick to decide to break up with you. Lmao. Men just decide when to stick around and dump you
Actually the one doing the approaching gives all the power to the person being approached. You have the power, these men don't, they are given you power to get their Willie's wet.
Depends on the situstion. If someone's just being hurtful, playing endless rounds of happy-go-dick around, sport fucking other ppl's lives they can work out closure for their own damn selves. No one can count on closure from someone like that either. Just walk away, cuz any conversation with an abuser will only be toxic, blame shifting bull shit. I'm all about closure, no need for bad blood. But if someone's just trying to jerk me around = I'm out. Me explaining to that person that you don't crap on others is a waste of time. Maybe if they suffer enough consequences (i.e. repeatedly getting dumped) they'll consider alternative behaviour. It's also been my experience that jerks like that get super needy & demanding when they don't get the attention to which they feel entitled. Seems more like they're pissed they got ghosted on before they could fully ghost. No one owes them any time or effort & I don't play games with little kids.
sometimes Silence is the Best medicine, PULL AWAY if he disrespects you, a woman will NEVER LOOK like an IDIOT. if he doesn't appreciate you....you can't teach a GUY to LOVE YOU...WALK AWAY.
A real man would ignore you if you are a liability or he is not into you. Very similiar yo why women ignore men. Congrats, now you know real men also ignore women they've no interest in.
I ignore people because I actually want to get away from them. I sensed something disturbing in their character, and to provide a "please don't contact me statement" will only add fuel to their anger.
S J or it makes him chase you harder As in my case I think it’s a ego issue.... the I WONT LET YOU LEAVE ME I don’t want you. But I don’t want anyone else to love you either I see it as he like drama No thank you sir , play with someone else mind
Relationships shouldn't be this complicated. Anyone who cares about you or loves you would not ignore you. They wouldn't like that done to them!! That's horrible to do to someone. If you get a guy or girl that plays mind games or messes with your heart this way, use this as a major red flag and move on. Don't give them a second chance. If someone truly cares for you, they wouldn't put themselves in a position to lose you. Period.
This is misleading as far as Im concerned, I pull back because Im overwhelmed and he feels ignored. We're just misunderstanding, then because he feels Im doing it on purpose he pulls back. Hes not playing he thinks its what is the right thing. Were learning eachother. Were fighting old habits, wete human.
Darcy Marie Druck Tcb Yes and no. It’s guy’s nature to test the waters. They push to see where your boundaries are and what you’ll tolerate. That is not directly related to how they feel about you. Know your standards and don’t waiver.
I am pulling away because he started off love bombing and eventually I feel for it and open up... now he goes days without calling and then when he appears again, he start with the love bombing. I told him him I don't like going days without talking to him. So he did it again went a few days without reaching out and then he hit me up on Monday and I ignored. All this time not talking to him , has taught me not miss him. My body isn't craving him, I don't care if he has another woman anymore. Once a women stop caring, it's over. I can see us maybe being platonic friends in the future. And you know most guys don't like to be friend zone with no benefits. Sorry but you can't love bomb me, open my heart up and think you can go days without communication. It's sad because I thought he was different , oh well. One thing I learned never tell a guy he the only one when y'all aren't official because he feels like he don't have to compete. Getting back on the dating scene and won't let the love bombs infiltrate
youre just selfish like the rest of them. you require too much from us. take what you get. not like your gonna love bomb him all the time...you just aint
After a certain amount of time of showing that interest.. she needs more to go off of, some clarity. In that instance I don’t think it’s “neediness” but just wanting decent communication.
There are studies showing that men often think women are more attracted to them/into them than we truly are. They overestimate their attractiveness to us. It's scientifically documented, before any butthurt boys have a go. Not that I read replies once I've said what I've said.
I don’t think women became needy , I think it’s because women seek security and constant reassurance from the guy that she’s the only one and he’s hers.
Could be projection. To be vulnerable is to be feminine…and the guy doesn’t like that. He hasn’t learned to assimilate it into his masculinity. So he hits her with the shame he feels.
I'm having fun figuring out men behavior. Is like learnign a language. Once you start understanding the translation you are like ohhhhhh, That's what it means! So the more you know about men behavior, the best you can prepare mentally to handle anything they do. I know now when I'm wasting my time.
Your advise is absolutely valuable. The guy I was interested in, told me that he needs time to get over his ex, but he hopes that nothing changes between us. I told him that he shouldn't contact me until he has something serious to offer. Wished him Goodluck n walked away.
That means either he's not much of a text kind of guy or he's not that interested in you to always be hitting you up. I've been there. Younger me chased them even more when they would run. Now me today, I would not even be phased and move on. Nothing is more unnattractive than a man who likes to play girls heads, and has comittment issues and brings that problem with every girl they lead on.
Ignore them, not to get them to chase (they always will eventually if they value you), but to get over them and regain your self-respect. If you’re watching videos like this, the chances are you’re hung up on a guy who legit doesn’t value you enough to make you a priority in his life... Keep in mind that some men will only chase for their own egotistic purposes and because they want access to you. If they care to any extent, they do reach out after you’ve gone silent for a few days to a week. I’ve been going in circles with a guy for years though. He always comes back but it never goes anywhere. Regardless of all I’ve done for him over the past few years, all the money I’ve helped him out with (thousands of dollars, literally,) been there for him, gone to bat to defend him, etc., but he keeps me in the friend zone and is never there for me while he’s there willingly for other women, even some he just met! He doesn’t give a shit about me and probably never will! It’s been time to move on and let go for a long time and I try, then he will text to see if I’m ok, share things with me, etc. In my case, I don’t think I can remain his friend because I have feelings, he doesn’t... Why are relationships so damn hard? Ugh. These videos are therapeutic for me. I love your advice Elliot! ❤️
He's emotionally unavailable. So.....that explains it. I noticed that he's getting distant every day. So I did 2 steps backward. I became cold AF LOL! I do not chat him unless he's the one who reached out first. And when he respond with message that's not asking for a response, I do not respond. I'll go on and live my own life.
Windy Manaog I used to do that with my ex and it went on and on like that for years! Don't waste a lot of time on this guy, look for someone who really is excited to see you.
I'm ignoring because it is his loss, being that He was always needing me for something, so I can have peace and keep my resources as well! Good riddance!
Sometimes women ignore because we want to validate how he feels about us. For example: If I pull away and he chases ...well, I know he's interested. If he doesn't, then he wasn't as interested as I thought.... so personally, I'd rather let it go in the early stages than invest any more time and effort and possibly save some heartache in the long run. Any regrets Elliot? ;)
If it takes you to pull away for him to FINALLY be interested, lol he’s not in love. He doesn’t want his toy to be put away....yet. Once he gets a new toy, lol he will let you go. Sadly.
Point one: Be willing to walk away if a guy ignores you flip the script simply rule: No Call No Text No Show ok now I forget walk away ladies give him taste of his own medicine
There’s a difference between giving up and knowing when you’ve had enough. Some women stop responding to men because they realize that they are the provider for their needs and a reason for him to feel anything but lonely. Our human nature is nurturing others and (for many of us) we need to stand firm and make them realize that we will care, but not carry.
Problem is ive done this and he started chatting and chasing again only to bench me. So i deleted him again and the cycle started again and again until he was like WHY ARE YOU DELETING AND IGNORING ME ALL THE TIME? i explained caz hes benching me and ignoring me and not interested in me etc so when i explained this in a rational way he BLOCKED ME! Now hes gone! So be aware he may be up for games and come running back so he can keep you as a trophy or a backup option NOT because he misses and wants you!
@@belle2263 yeah. They want validation and attention with minimum effort. If they get it, than they disappear again, or will gost you. They are MPI-s=minimum possible investment guys.
@@kendall9289 how many times did u actually meet up? We met 3 x was supposed to be booty call but 3rd time he took me to movies as i was following Elliotts advice. Then he pulled away and this BS begun. Obviously he wants me but too scared or something im confused what he was actually doin and why he would take me to the movies if he wasn't wanting to keep seeing me in person. Perhaps if this is so common elliot should do a video on this to explain this BS behavior. It conditions us to never trust men
The thing is though if you are ignoring a guy it can help you in a way to get over him. If he’s too scared to confront you, he’s a shy guy and is afraid maybe you’ll bite his head off or don’t want his advances anymore(yes this has happened to me before), that is a turnoff and I’ll just lose all desire and attraction. If I’m ignoring him, and if he really cares, he better ask what’s up real quick otherwise whatever I felt for him is gone. So your ignoring ends up being where you’re just not into him anymore, and that may be ultimately a good thing
Bridgette Mezlini In general, you also have to consider that a guy might actually like a girl but is turned off by the fact that she started to ignore him for no apparent reason. Some guys will (justifiably) consider that an act of disrespect and stop dealing with the girl.
From a guy: never ignore him to get him back. I was and it immediately told me everything I needed to know. A man who respects himself will not put up with childish behavior like that.
Blunt relationship advice for those who struggle with the 'does he/she love me' question: I never ignore the one I love or play guessing games, hard to get or other immature games. I ask the questions I want the answers to and I have "the conversations" like a mature person. It's not a business transaction I'm not negotiating shit. It's a reltionship, and frankly if you can't discuss these kinds of things in general, such as: boundaries, deal breakers, commitment, relationship status, and provide clarity, without the person flaking out on you, LEAVE. ALSO LEAVE if there is no follow through: making (and keeping) solid plans, or there is eggshell walking, games of ANY KIND including passive agression, GET OUT! Don't tiptoe around fragile egos. Don't lower your standards, or energy to people please. TELL your s/o to LEVEL the fuck up (be mature) and Rise to match you or get the hell out of your way cuz you're not into letting people waste your time! This is HEALTHY THINKING beloveds. It doesn't make you cold to respect yourself. Any person male or female who has issues with your boundaries or you respecting yourself is not a person who loves you and most assuredly is a person you should avoid entirely because they do mean you harm.
I'm ignoring him because he played with my emotions for 5 weeks then said he hadn't got time for a date. I haven't got time to allow him into my heart in that case. I value myself
I hate the regret game. Shoulda coulda woulda. The over analyzing of every little thing I said or did is BRUTAL. It is my goal to drop that second guessing. My thinking is to learn how to stay present and truly be healthy and authentic to myself and if something I did or said made a guy turn away, then he is the wrong guy. Maybe I have this wrong, but It should not be that easy to scare away the right guy. Hard to stay steady when facing losing someone you really like. The temptation would be there to adjust yourself to pull him in. But, thanks Elliot for reinforcing that this would always be a mistake. Stay strong ladies.
I’ve ignored before and he’s chased.... apologized, confessed my importance in his life etc...but this time, I’m walking with no intentions of really looking back except things start happening the way I want it to.
Same thing happened to me. A guy back in 2013 led me on and hung out a few times to becoming distant, he stopped hitting me up and finally tells me days later after ignoring me "I've been thinking about alot, I can see us together for a while but not forever, you need someone better than me". But that wasn't all for another five months he continued to orbit around me, nothing else to offer me but empty promises on FB once in a while then ignored me again if I responded. I was done being his ego stroke. I moved on and found someone else and never looked back.
One more thing is remember that you teach people how to treat you. If you put up with bad treatment or their bullshit it will continue. Don't put up with bad or disrespectful treatment from men.
Men usually know from the getco if he wants to be with a girl or not, it’s just how their brains work. If he isn’t making any kind of commitment with you and only comes to you when he wants sex then that’s most likely all you’re going to get from the dude and it’s time to move on and not look into a future with him. If a man wants you he’ll do whatever it takes to make you his gf before another man tries if he never brings up having a relationship with you then he doesn’t want to be with you.
This video was comforting. I started to step back after chasing a man whose so totally unavailable. He would make plans then pull back and ignore me again. This time I'm trying to turn the tables. And you're right about negotiating he does it every time I get frustrated cause he doesnt make time to see me. I don't want to be the f**king idiot even though I want to keep the door open for him.
How about this, When he tells you who he really is believe him. When he tells you hes not ready for a relationship believe him.. When he tells you that he likes you but he just can't commit right now believe him. When they are not meeting your expectations there is nothing wrong with walking away and not wasting anybody's time.
I just went cold turkey. Deleted all social media and changed number. I dont ignore, I pull away. Maybe i was giving him hard time by being so interested, now he can breathe easy. Cheers
@@anna-mariagriego8585 maybe we are too eager and too interested... Maybe we are suffocating them with our love. Just pick yourself up and disappear. We wouldn't like to "bother" them, right
Yes I did exactly the same well done girl! They're scumbags chatting multiple women so forget them! Ignoring us means they're not interested in any loving interaction.
Happen to be outside witb a guy looking really hot when you know he'll drive by or can see.( wink) If that doesn't get his attention your not on his radar.
@@DarrionVaughn No, it is the guys job. If he likes her, he will do something. No need to be a mind reader, it is common sense. Well not so common I guess for you males, it should be.
A gave a guy 4 months of patience, he pulled out on x3 dates! Said he had huge walls built up , & I was to good to be true etc. Why did I even like him etc. In the end I had enough. He started to turn cruel for no reason . His lack of send esteem was getting me down. Good luck to him he’s going to need it . I was so dam patient with him. His loss.
Honestly I hate the chase. I don't do anything on purpose anymore. If I like a guy and he likes me I will give him my attention. If I don't like him I won't give him my attention. If I give him my attention and he takes it for granted, bye. But what annoys me most are the ones I ignore and continue to chase after me, and the ones when I move on they want my attention again. There's something about being uninterested that makes a guy really like you which baffles me because don't guys want to be with a girl that likes them?!? lmfao
I ignored a guy when he was trying to get laid after the third date and I wanted to wait because I had a feeling I am not his first choice. And I am glad I did it and he simply disappeared when I tried to contact him. I was able to avoid a disaster!
Sometimes we just have to let go. As for myself I have been taken care of myself and have been taken care of myself for the last three years. I was the one was looking for someone in places ,faces,and chasing . That was things I was going through . Bad time in my life and not putting myself through that anymore.
It seems to me Elliott that in your opinion a guy is never in love. It's all calculated and how he fares in a relationship. And when his Eyes wonder he thinks "Did I do the right thing of sticking with her"?. You Man suffer from the " It's always greener on the other side" syndrome. I'm so sick of it.
The answer he tries to give: the same things people truly may think period. There r no surprises in here. Elliot claims regret is a powerful emotion. ta ta.
I don't pull away. I know that i deserve better and I just can't stand feeling like a second choice, second option. If things are want for me will meet me half way. other than that am prioritizing my time, my energy in something worth my happiness. Be strong out there ladies and don't be afraid to walk away and tou dint have to compromise your values to love someone who doesn't put much effort.
Women ignore them because they are no more interested, for me , no matter what they are trying to take me back, there’s no way I’m going back, because the fire is gone.
I wouldn’t negotiate a man into committing because even if he decided to not let you get away AND GIVES YOU WHAT YOU WANT! When he’s starts to cheat , he will say “ I told you I wasn’t ready for a relationship “ !
I only ignore people after they do not try and work on the relationship. Or treat me like i am a convenience. I let them know i am not happy with their behavior and try and see if we can fix the situation and if he doesn't understand commitment i am gone. They always regret it ... ALWAYS. I do not put up with bad behaviors.
I blocked him because he does this thing where everything is good and then he randomly gets moody and says or does some asshole, cold, or mean shit… (he’s a cancer). He’s super sweet, he’s a grown man, he works, own place, takes care of himself, takes care of me, motivates me, roots for me to succeed, but he’s done it about 3 times and each time i tell him it’s a trigger don’t do that. The other we were we playing around on the phone I told him to relax jokingly he was like apologize or you’re gonna get a punishment and I said no I’m not gonna apologize thinking we’re just joking around having fun and he deadass hung up on me. I find that to be extremely rude and disrespectful. Gave him like 10 minutes to text or call back, he didn’t so I blocked. First time doing it. I’m done talking. Don’t disrespect me. Hanging up the phone on me is a big deal to me because it triggers my abandonment issues. It’s been 2 nights… miss him but still cannot tolerate that. So the focus is back primarily on ME. when I’m supposed to, I’ll meet someone else, and someone even better.
I didnt understand whats being said in the video. Girls do what YOU think is right at that moment. Ignore, pull away whatever . Nobody does anything create a drama unless one is hurt or has some problem with the situation and mostly guys KNOW why she is doing it.
I really do enjoy all your videos question why do guys close their eyes during sex
we do only if she's below a 6
kidding lol. not sure why
Elliot Scott 😂😂😂😂😂😂 seriously ???
So what does it mean when he open his eyes and close them back 🤔🤔
@@ElliotScottDating I don't think you are 😂
@@marieanne1989 he thinks you're his grandmom
Elliot Scott Lol great answer
The power of walking away is the best feeling when you realize you deserve wayyy better
The one the pulls away it's in a better position.
Yes! I did. Blocked him and it’s been 4 weeks no contact I feel sooo accomplished
7 Signs He's A Safe Man And That You Can Trust Him - Jonathon Aslay podcast
Very very true
Absolutely! Walking away is a powerful act of self-respect. Knowing your worth and choosing better for yourself is such a liberating feeling! 💪❤
I walked away bc he was treating me like an option and I deserve better
Wait take it back...texted him...🌝
Same here 😀
@@LemeaGabralla88 bahahaha
I need this. Congratulations that you did it.
Yas honey!!! Drop them and find better.
Why are relationships so hard these days. Why can’t we just meet someone, like each other, build a relationship and call it a day.
Good point 👍
Its all because of effort. Effort is the key. When both parties lack it there will be no success. Unfortunately its happened to all of us. Maybe someday you’ll find someone who gives you the same effort you give them.
People are trash these days no matter what color they are ……and role reversal. The women want to be the alpha and the men are feminine. Meaning men want women to chase them ……………real talk
❤️
Many there are many choices these days with many social media
I’m ignoring him because he literally thinks it’s okay to talk to me when it’s convenient for him or “when he has time” . Guess what? I’m going to text him when I have time aka never 👸🏽
Ava The Darling same and it’s working. He is sending snaps all the time now 🤣🤣🤣
You are right .. smart woman 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Boo that’s the same exact thing I’m doing to my man 💁🏻♀️
Ava The Darling black
Purgatory RUST yes I’m black, and? Troll.
I ignore him even though I'm in love because it's going nowhere frankly
Same here.
This is very true for a lot of women.
same here too😭😭
I'm in love too 🤦 I have the ignore button on READY.
Nerd Incognito Sue what was the reason it keeps happening? It keeps happening to me as well.
I am ignoring right now because every time I pay attention I wait for days to hear something back. This time I am not waiting, I learned my lesson and I've had enough.
Mildred Gardner That kind of behavior would leave me with the very fundamental doubt about his love which hangs over like a shadow even if the relationship were to continue. Good for you to call his bluff and remove the aggravation. Mature relationships are better and worth the wait.
Same here!! I want him to reach out. No more reaching out first and not getting a response. I am setting my boundaries
@@mildredgardner991 isn't it satisfying when the shoe is on the other foot though 😁
@Me, myself, and I this happened to me with my recent EX. We were still "friends" after the break up and his life was spiraling down as in he lost his job(s) and his home. He started reaching out to me more frequent but I kept turning him down cause I've already moved on. He wasn't aware of this and asked me out on
Vday. Then he asked, "so I shouldn't get emotionally involved with you?" I said, "uh no Sorry I just don't feel that way about you anymore". It wasn't devastating for me to tell him how I felt because all I could remember is how he treated me in the end of our relationship and he also wasn't a good friend when we still kept in touch after we broke up. I'll admit one thing I think being his friend in the end helped me actually move on cause I was so caught up in my old feelings for him that I couldn't see who he really was in my heart. He wasn't caring and was very selfish. So it opened up my eyes and made it easier for me to let him go.
Hate to say it took about 2 yrs later after our break up to see the light at the end of the tunnel. But it happened...
I love it!! I agree!! Though, I'm not going to "ignore" him. I'm just going to live my life 100%, without giving any thought about how he feels about me. Happiness on my own terms. If he's worth MY time just maybe he can come with me. But I'm at the point, that I really don't care.
If he is hot and cold
Treat him like a cold turkey
Motto::: never beg someone to love you
And dont ignore people to get them to like you
Edfyr lol why not? He treats me like an option
True
Oh damn right
@@Hi-vp2bq bec if you show them you like them, they take you for granted : )
One thing about a smart woman men do not get: women give all of themselves. So when they run out of giving a shit, it’s OVER. Forever. No going back. So be careful guys. There is a limit and then you’re in the Twilight Zone.
When men run out of giving a shit, it's over too, permanently. We have our limits, and when women cross our limits, some of us go MGTOW. From what I have seen since my divorce, I am merely missing a category 6 hurricane of troubles. And yes, I walked out on her because she was involved with drugs behind my back.
No great loss. Plenty of easy pussy out there.
@@jameswatsonatheistgamer right but less women of substance. pick your poison.
@@hodmedia844 Vodka.
@@jameswatsonatheistgamer there's also a lot of men out there. It's quite easy for women to get laid any night of the week than for a guy. Now real relationships of substance are a whole other issue.
I match energy!! The only time I ignore or pull away is because I received that same energy!🤷🏾♀️
Starchild goddess_’333 exactly
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Love this. Match your energy
Facts
Right!
Whatever energy you give me I will give that back and it’s not to play games at all. I treat people how they treat me. I will never allow a guy to control my emotions period.
I'm not ignoring. I've pulled away. And he knows why.
Chenal Attwood I hate it when the dating coaches make it out to be like it’s always the woman’s fault and men are just wired to always “wander” bc a female did something to “trigger” him to have second thoughts. Men need to put in the same effort as women are expected to do as well. It’s like in this generation it’s our job as women to do all the work and chasing while the men just sit back and pick and choose which girl they like better.
Faeries_Xylia 923 👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽
@@Poison_Ivy22 You can't choose who to be attracted to.
You call putting make up and putting a nice dress on putting effort? Lol not even close. Things have changed.
Men are always the risk takers and I never seen a girl asking a guy out on a date. I always see guys ask woman out on dates and get rejected.
When are girls gonna start asking guys they like out and taking a risk? Too painful if you get rejected right? Well men deal with that every single day and some are getting tired of it. We have feelings too.
I've had girls give me the signals that they like me but when I ask them out on a date they say maybe or leave me hanging the next day. I don't have time for games and that's all girls like to play. Mind games.
But guess what? I have better things to do.
Kenny z You clearly didn’t understand my comment but instead made up a completely different story in your head.
I NEVER said anything about men being assholes for rejecting women, you’re entitled to be with who you want to be with, my comment was how I think it’s bullshit for how whenever a man talks to a woman now and leads her on telling her he wants to be with her then POOF he ghosts her and a lot of times he’ll come back around just to lead her on some more to have that satisfaction to see if he can still have her, I know bc I’ve seen this too many times.
Both genders do it, yes. You are correct.
But what I don’t like now is how dating coaches and people in general always somehow now make the dudes actions the woman’s fault bc she must have “said” or “did” something to “trigger” him to “run”.. like wtf last time I checked 2 wrongs don’t make a right!
You said it yourself how it’s bullshit how women been doing this shit for years so what makes you think it’s okay for men to do the same thing? Looks like you’re excusing Men bc now it’s y’alls turn, right? Lol
If a guy doesn’t like the girl, guys usually know from the beginning if he sees a future with the girl or not so if you all know you don’t want to be with the girl then why continue to lead her on just to get what you want out of it then drop her and ghost her bc you grew bored and call the girl crazy just bc you got her to grow feelings for you? Not only that but try to keep her on the side just in case if you might need a “back up” later?
I don’t miss the single life one bit bc in this generation both men and women play too many games, y’all don’t know what it means to be in a relationship anymore and that’s why a lot of couples don’t last longer than maybe 3 years if you’re lucky. No one gets what it means to be in a relationship anymore, it’s hard to be in a relationship when you’re keeping 1 foot out to see what else might be out there when you promised a commitment with a person already, huh? Lol
Everyone just wants to have their cake and eat it now to.
@Faeries_Xylia 923 Here's a virtual high five!!!! THIS is exactly what I've noticed in our generation and this is exactly what people do! You're absolutely spot on. Seriously, I wish I could like this comment a 100 times!!!
When ignore, I'm protecting myself. I'm scared. I don't want to be hurt again.
Same here 💯
You right
I don't ignore. Im not rude. I just fall back and do me. They either chase or we don't communicate. It's that MF simple.
Exactly!
Wow, first female I've heard about speak that..
I swear
I agree 👍
Yep 👍
I've done this to a guy, only because he showed interest in me one day then act cold and distant towards me the next and it honestly made me not want to even bother with him.🤷♀️
He’s crazy, controlling and manipulative. Good job for immediately running!
Im going through that right now. He said he saw me once on train station and was searching me for 6 months to know who I am and he found my on facebook. He said he is in love with me. Even after one date we had he accidentaly saw me again near train station and he stood still forgot where he was going. He send me a text that day It was nice to see you. When I saw you I forgot where I was going cuz your so beautifull. I was laughing cuz I rhink he is in love with me but he is so insecure cuz once I texted him and he was so cold to me and ignoring me my text. Now I didn reach out for him about a month and he now is texting like crazy like how are you and what are you doing. Now Im ignoring him and he is now ok what is happening. Lol. I think he likesto play games and I dont. Im makeing him sweat now but Im still like ok and happy. If I see him again in town I will be like its nothong wrong between us.
Fearful avoidant
Same
You ignore me...I ignore you & pull away EVEN if I really like him...it’ll hurt but the hurt is worth it now than being in an unwanted relationship later
I know that right
True!
@@Shardedom 💯 ❤️
@@georginabrigs1891 ❤️💯
Yah it’s your ego. The bigger your ego is the more you’ll sacrifice to not have your ego hurt. But deep down you know wassup tho. deep down is where the truth lies.
I don't ignore, i just forget he even exists. Oops !
🤣😂😘
Lmbo!😂
So how will you feel if others do this too you?
@@princeofdreams5526 Really?
Lmao
I walked away because he expects me to be available when ever he needed me. The days we made plans to be together he stood me up, so I walked away.
Same here....
👏👏👏💖
I've never been stood up. That's certainly a good reason to end it
@@aodh5966 That's very rude.
This has happened to me two times by now, in less that a month. I'm done. I need a man, not a boy.
Basic law of attraction, "Flee (ignore) and they will follow, Follow and they will Flee!" works everytime on every type of men. Another law of basic attraction, "You always want what you can't have"
😕
Works on women too
That’s not love.
When you ignore someone, you teach them to live without you.
Not when your with a man who loves the singke life to begin with
Patches Michelle Yup. Guys put it in their heads that once they have the girl that she’ll always want him not realizing how many more options we do have waiting for us, they think they can treat the girl like crap and think she’ll always be there. If you don’t feed the animal it dies, well if you don’t give the girl the attention that she needs she’ll eventually find another man who will and she’ll forget all about you. Everyone moves on if you stay away long enough
Hist Ory Why would you even treat a woman badly to begin with? That makes no sense.
@@darquequeen2323 I've heard tons of guys say this, actually he's helping in this response. Shows how desperate women are the warped psychology that women have when it comes to men, it's a weird law of attraction. But I agree, it's not fair to us.
Hist Ory trust me hun that will only work for so long before the girl comes to her senses and is over it. It happened to me too, the more the guy ignored me the more I wanted him to talk to me but once I had enough I was done and moved on, they try coming back once they see I’m over them but I never let them back in bc I moved on already.
When it is a hopeless situation, walk away. If I see him showing interest in any other girls, walk away.
What if you’re not yet exclusive and he’s flirting with another girl?
@@notme7310Red flag, move on.
I ignore him because I want nothing to do with him anymore. He took me for granted and he didn't think a second I would do that. That's how life goes when you are willing to walk away. He tries to re-engage with me. Why? He misses having access to me.
Exactly same thing happened to me I’m done
Exactly that 💯
Men almost always come back... sometimes it takes years, but it will happen. There’s a 9 out of 10 chance. At least in my experience.
That is very true
years...babe..i dont have time for that
SB169885 who does? Lol
Hist Ory lol I know!
Actually I've had them all come back saying they messed up and made the biggest mistake of their lives. So it's not always physical! I think something just clicks in their heads because they are either focused on career or immature at the time and trying to search for better options etc.
By ignoring him I just don’t text first. I always let him initiate contact. This is why men always have the power, it’s up to them, if they want to contact you. There’s no point in developing feelings for men because they get to decide if they like you and they get to decide when they stop liking you and lose interest. He’ll decide that he likes you, makes you get interested in him then change his mind. There’s no point in liking guys because he will change his mind. Even in a relationship he will up and change his mind. There’s no point to love, because it all depends on the man’s feelings.
Point on exactly stay out of ya feelings.🤗
N B - true. Good luck out there 💕💕
And when he found someone attractive in his eyes either they gonna stick around with you or cheat and try his chances to that other woman and when he gets busted he’s so quick to decide to break up with you. Lmao. Men just decide when to stick around and dump you
Actually the one doing the approaching gives all the power to the person being approached. You have the power, these men don't, they are given you power to get their Willie's wet.
Wow you take 0 accountability for yourself huh. You sound like a child.
Decent people provide closure.
Thank you 🐸
Exactly
Really depends how the other person treated them.
Shaun Hensley, Perfectly Said, and TRUTH!
Depends on the situstion.
If someone's just being hurtful, playing endless rounds of happy-go-dick around, sport fucking other ppl's lives they can work out closure for their own damn selves.
No one can count on closure from someone like that either. Just walk away, cuz any conversation with an abuser will only be toxic, blame shifting bull shit.
I'm all about closure, no need for bad blood. But if someone's just trying to jerk me around = I'm out. Me explaining to that person that you don't crap on others is a waste of time. Maybe if they suffer enough consequences (i.e. repeatedly getting dumped) they'll consider alternative behaviour.
It's also been my experience that jerks like that get super needy & demanding when they don't get the attention to which they feel entitled. Seems more like they're pissed they got ghosted on before they could fully ghost. No one owes them any time or effort & I don't play games with little kids.
I’m ignoring him because he disappeared for days so just giving him a taste of his own medicine and yes I’m willing to walk away.
Yesss, so trueee
Wow you so rock❤❤❤
sometimes Silence is the Best medicine, PULL AWAY if he disrespects you, a woman will NEVER LOOK like an IDIOT.
if he doesn't appreciate you....you can't teach a GUY to LOVE YOU...WALK AWAY.
Love yourself first ❤️💯. The groom waits on the bride to come!!!! It’s not ignoring... it’s knowing self worth and not wasting time.
Yup!! Know your worth.
The bride makes a beautiful entrance when she loves and TRUSTS him
A Real man wouldn’t even ignore you..Period!
sometimes people have to ignore for their own sanity and mental health and they still do be real
Sure he would
A real man would ignore you if you are a liability or he is not into you. Very similiar yo why women ignore men. Congrats, now you know real men also ignore women they've no interest in.
A real man would ignore u at the first sign of game or manipulative tendencies
I ignore people because I actually want to get away from them. I sensed something disturbing in their character, and to provide a "please don't contact me statement" will only add fuel to their anger.
S J
or it makes him chase you harder As in my case
I think it’s a ego issue....
the I WONT LET YOU LEAVE ME I don’t want you. But I don’t want anyone else to love you either
I see it as he like drama
No thank you sir , play with someone else mind
True
I do the same.
Oh yes
I agree I block and tell them to fuck off
Relationships shouldn't be this complicated. Anyone who cares about you or loves you would not ignore you. They wouldn't like that done to them!! That's horrible to do to someone. If you get a guy or girl that plays mind games or messes with your heart this way, use this as a major red flag and move on. Don't give them a second chance. If someone truly cares for you, they wouldn't put themselves in a position to lose you. Period.
This is misleading as far as Im concerned, I pull back because Im overwhelmed and he feels ignored. We're just misunderstanding, then because he feels Im doing it on purpose he pulls back. Hes not playing he thinks its what is the right thing.
Were learning eachother. Were fighting old habits, wete human.
Well said, Darcy, all these mind games are so immature and a complete waste of valuable time that could have spent getting to know one another.
Darcy Marie Druck Tcb Yes and no. It’s guy’s nature to test the waters. They push to see where your boundaries are and what you’ll tolerate. That is not directly related to how they feel about you. Know your standards and don’t waiver.
That's true I've apologized to my ex and still haven't gotten a response yet
Than how else do u show your worth?
I am pulling away because he started off love bombing and eventually I feel for it and open up... now he goes days without calling and then when he appears again, he start with the love bombing. I told him him I don't like going days without talking to him. So he did it again went a few days without reaching out and then he hit me up on Monday and I ignored. All this time not talking to him , has taught me not miss him. My body isn't craving him, I don't care if he has another woman anymore. Once a women stop caring, it's over. I can see us maybe being platonic friends in the future. And you know most guys don't like to be friend zone with no benefits. Sorry but you can't love bomb me, open my heart up and think you can go days without communication. It's sad because I thought he was different , oh well. One thing I learned never tell a guy he the only one when y'all aren't official because he feels like he don't have to compete. Getting back on the dating scene and won't let the love bombs infiltrate
U escaped a narcissists. Be happy u did🙏
You saved yourself from the misery of a narcissist. Right on!
VVVENUSSS SSSIRENSSS that guy is probably a narcissist.. Good for you just ignore him.
This is exactly what's happening to me right now but I can't do it anymore.
youre just selfish like the rest of them. you require too much from us. take what you get. not like your gonna love bomb him all the time...you just aint
lmao when he’s like “I’m not looking for a relationship” and then straight up full-on dates someone after he stops talking to you
This happens all the time
truth is you was playing games, he noticed that, so he moved on to someone else
@@zero1188 nah, I’m pretty sure it’s because they only see you as hook up material and decided they don’t like your personality enough to date you
If you aint tryna fuck what did you expect
Why is a woman automatically needy when a woman is interested ? I don’t get it
After a certain amount of time of showing that interest.. she needs more to go off of, some clarity. In that instance I don’t think it’s “neediness” but just wanting decent communication.
There are studies showing that men often think women are more attracted to them/into them than we truly are. They overestimate their attractiveness to us.
It's scientifically documented, before any butthurt boys have a go. Not that I read replies once I've said what I've said.
I don’t think women became needy , I think it’s because women seek security and constant reassurance from the guy that she’s the only one and he’s hers.
@@DallasJayCook and she usually isn't in the early stages.
Could be projection. To be vulnerable is to be feminine…and the guy doesn’t like that. He hasn’t learned to assimilate it into his masculinity. So he hits her with the shame he feels.
I'm having fun figuring out men behavior. Is like learnign a language. Once you start understanding the translation you are like ohhhhhh, That's what it means! So the more you know about men behavior, the best you can prepare mentally to handle anything they do. I know now when I'm wasting my time.
That is too much compromise right there. They can either follow your lead or keep it pushing. Men are very well aware of what they are doing?
MICHELLE TORRES
And usually the language spells he has a Wife & kids at home...
I’ve never seen this type behavior fail me
Same things for woman's
MICHELLE TORRES word
I ignore him because I’ve had enough 🤣
Your advise is absolutely valuable. The guy I was interested in, told me that he needs time to get over his ex, but he hopes that nothing changes between us. I told him that he shouldn't contact me until he has something serious to offer. Wished him Goodluck n walked away.
I’m ignoring him because he’s taking hours to respond and the conversation is very dry.
Same
Same
That means either he's not much of a text kind of guy or he's not that interested in you to always be hitting you up. I've been there. Younger me chased them even more when they would run. Now me today, I would not even be phased and move on. Nothing is more unnattractive than a man who likes to play girls heads, and has comittment issues and brings that problem with every girl they lead on.
He’s just not that interested in you
👍
I usually only ignore when I no longer wanna be bothered and I'm completely done.
As Corey Wayne will say walk away and mean it! And that is so true. If you keep walking away and going back you lose your value.
Exactly also known as dress rehearsal...repetative...after awhile until she finally had had ENOUGH!!!
Ignore them, not to get them to chase (they always will eventually if they value you), but to get over them and regain your self-respect. If you’re watching videos like this, the chances are you’re hung up on a guy who legit doesn’t value you enough to make you a priority in his life... Keep in mind that some men will only chase for their own egotistic purposes and because they want access to you. If they care to any extent, they do reach out after you’ve gone silent for a few days to a week. I’ve been going in circles with a guy for years though. He always comes back but it never goes anywhere. Regardless of all I’ve done for him over the past few years, all the money I’ve helped him out with (thousands of dollars, literally,) been there for him, gone to bat to defend him, etc., but he keeps me in the friend zone and is never there for me while he’s there willingly for other women, even some he just met! He doesn’t give a shit about me and probably never will! It’s been time to move on and let go for a long time and I try, then he will text to see if I’m ok, share things with me, etc. In my case, I don’t think I can remain his friend because I have feelings, he doesn’t... Why are relationships so damn hard? Ugh. These videos are therapeutic for me. I love your advice Elliot! ❤️
Right 100
He's emotionally unavailable. So.....that explains it. I noticed that he's getting distant every day. So I did 2 steps backward. I became cold AF LOL! I do not chat him unless he's the one who reached out first. And when he respond with message that's not asking for a response, I do not respond. I'll go on and live my own life.
Windy Manaog I used to do that with my ex and it went on and on like that for years! Don't waste a lot of time on this guy, look for someone who really is excited to see you.
Don't respond at all
I'm ignoring because I'm sure he's less than 51%.
I'm ignoring because it is his loss, being that He was always needing me for something, so I can have peace and keep my resources as well! Good riddance!
I think the reason why regret is so powerful is u always feel u can go back and reverse things but you know u cant😕
Sometimes women ignore because we want to validate how he feels about us. For example: If I pull away and he chases ...well, I know he's interested. If he doesn't, then he wasn't as interested as I thought.... so personally, I'd rather let it go in the early stages than invest any more time and effort and possibly save some heartache in the long run.
Any regrets Elliot? ;)
ABSOLUTELY. And you helped me remember another one of womens love needs: validation
This is true
If it takes you to pull away for him to FINALLY be interested, lol he’s not in love. He doesn’t want his toy to be put away....yet. Once he gets a new toy, lol he will let you go. Sadly.
That's what I do
Truth Sayer 1000%
I ignore him because he acts like I don’t have options so he can treat me how he wants. I deserve better.
What happened with this guy?
Point one: Be willing to walk away if a guy ignores you flip the script simply rule: No Call No Text No Show ok now I forget walk away ladies give him taste of his own medicine
There is power in being the "dumper'. It feels great.
There’s a difference between giving up and knowing when you’ve had enough. Some women stop responding to men because they realize that they are the provider for their needs and a reason for him to feel anything but lonely. Our human nature is nurturing others and (for many of us) we need to stand firm and make them realize that we will care, but not carry.
Problem is ive done this and he started chatting and chasing again only to bench me. So i deleted him again and the cycle started again and again until he was like WHY ARE YOU DELETING AND IGNORING ME ALL THE TIME? i explained caz hes benching me and ignoring me and not interested in me etc so when i explained this in a rational way he BLOCKED ME! Now hes gone! So be aware he may be up for games and come running back so he can keep you as a trophy or a backup option NOT because he misses and wants you!
Attention seeker. That is why I block them.
@@xdxdxdxd4575 you think men do this to get attention? I believe i was possibly dealing with a narcissist which may explain it.
@@belle2263 yeah. They want validation and attention with minimum effort. If they get it, than they disappear again, or will gost you. They are MPI-s=minimum possible investment guys.
Good riddance to him and well done to you
@@kendall9289 how many times did u actually meet up? We met 3 x was supposed to be booty call but 3rd time he took me to movies as i was following Elliotts advice. Then he pulled away and this BS begun. Obviously he wants me but too scared or something im confused what he was actually doin and why he would take me to the movies if he wasn't wanting to keep seeing me in person. Perhaps if this is so common elliot should do a video on this to explain this BS behavior. It conditions us to never trust men
Men want what they can't have. It's as simple and as complicated as that.
So do women
@@gimmeyouripaddress524 Most of us want you guys to step up and be good husbands and fathers and not make us more crazy!
The thing is though if you are ignoring a guy it can help you in a way to get over him. If he’s too scared to confront you, he’s a shy guy and is afraid maybe you’ll bite his head off or don’t want his advances anymore(yes this has happened to me before), that is a turnoff and I’ll just lose all desire and attraction. If I’m ignoring him, and if he really cares, he better ask what’s up real quick otherwise whatever I felt for him is gone. So your ignoring ends up being where you’re just not into him anymore, and that may be ultimately a good thing
Bridgette Mezlini In general, you also have to consider that a guy might actually like a girl but is turned off by the fact that she started to ignore him for no apparent reason. Some guys will (justifiably) consider that an act of disrespect and stop dealing with the girl.
@@oriole2430 one hundred times this.
What do you say when he reaches out tho?
that's manipulation.. why would anybody want to be in a manipulative relationship feeling bad/helpless? Relationship is supposed to be something good
Sounds like games, good luck finding a man, otherwise find cats and settle for being booty call lol
When you like the video before even watching 💕💁🏽♀️😘
From a guy: never ignore him to get him back. I was and it immediately told me everything I needed to know. A man who respects himself will not put up with childish behavior like that.
Shut the fuck up
Blunt relationship advice for those who struggle with the 'does he/she love me' question: I never ignore the one I love or play guessing games, hard to get or other immature games. I ask the questions I want the answers to and I have "the conversations" like a mature person. It's not a business transaction I'm not negotiating shit. It's a reltionship, and frankly if you can't discuss these kinds of things in general, such as: boundaries, deal breakers, commitment, relationship status, and provide clarity, without the person flaking out on you, LEAVE. ALSO LEAVE if there is no follow through: making (and keeping) solid plans, or there is eggshell walking, games of ANY KIND including passive agression, GET OUT! Don't tiptoe around fragile egos. Don't lower your standards, or energy to people please. TELL your s/o to LEVEL the fuck up (be mature) and Rise to match you or get the hell out of your way cuz you're not into letting people waste your time! This is HEALTHY THINKING beloveds. It doesn't make you cold to respect yourself. Any person male or female who has issues with your boundaries or you respecting yourself is not a person who loves you and most assuredly is a person you should avoid entirely because they do mean you harm.
❤
I'm ignoring him because he played with my emotions for 5 weeks then said he hadn't got time for a date. I haven't got time to allow him into my heart in that case. I value myself
I hate the regret game. Shoulda coulda woulda. The over analyzing of every little thing I said or did is BRUTAL. It is my goal to drop that second guessing. My thinking is to learn how to stay present and truly be healthy and authentic to myself and if something I did or said made a guy turn away, then he is the wrong guy. Maybe I have this wrong, but It should not be that easy to scare away the right guy. Hard to stay steady when facing losing someone you really like. The temptation would be there to adjust yourself to pull him in. But, thanks Elliot for reinforcing that this would always be a mistake. Stay strong ladies.
Thank you for the clarity. I pulled away and ignored him, he was dishonest and caused unnecessary drama with his actions.
I’ve ignored before and he’s chased.... apologized, confessed my importance in his life etc...but this time, I’m walking with no intentions of really looking back except things start happening the way I want it to.
Same thing happened to me. A guy back in 2013 led me on and hung out a few times to becoming distant, he stopped hitting me up and finally tells me days later after ignoring me "I've been thinking about alot, I can see us together for a while but not forever, you need someone better than me".
But that wasn't all for another five months he continued to orbit around me, nothing else to offer me but empty promises on FB once in a while then ignored me again if I responded. I was done being his ego stroke. I moved on and found someone else and never looked back.
One more thing is remember that you teach people how to treat you. If you put up with bad treatment or their bullshit it will continue. Don't put up with bad or disrespectful treatment from men.
Men usually know from the getco if he wants to be with a girl or not, it’s just how their brains work. If he isn’t making any kind of commitment with you and only comes to you when he wants sex then that’s most likely all you’re going to get from the dude and it’s time to move on and not look into a future with him.
If a man wants you he’ll do whatever it takes to make you his gf before another man tries if he never brings up having a relationship with you then he doesn’t want to be with you.
“Give it right back to them!” Match their responses.
This video was comforting. I started to step back after chasing a man whose so totally unavailable. He would make plans then pull back and ignore me again. This time I'm trying to turn the tables. And you're right about negotiating he does it every time I get frustrated cause he doesnt make time to see me. I don't want to be the f**king idiot even though I want to keep the door open for him.
How about this, When he tells you who he really is believe him. When he tells you hes not ready for a relationship believe him.. When he tells you that he likes you but he just can't commit right now believe him. When they are not meeting your expectations there is nothing wrong with walking away and not wasting anybody's time.
In short he doesn’t care
I decided to walk away because I know what I want and I’m solid.
I just went cold turkey. Deleted all social media and changed number. I dont ignore, I pull away. Maybe i was giving him hard time by being so interested, now he can breathe easy. Cheers
I need to do this right now. My guy is always working, says he can't handle too many texts from me...wtf. today is day 1....go kick rocks!
@@anna-mariagriego8585 maybe we are too eager and too interested... Maybe we are suffocating them with our love. Just pick yourself up and disappear. We wouldn't like to "bother" them, right
@@chermoka right...I actually just cut him off. He'll be back, but I may not want him then.
Yes I did exactly the same well done girl! They're scumbags chatting multiple women so forget them! Ignoring us means they're not interested in any loving interaction.
The minute you realize “oh he is seeing other girls while he is seeing me and he keeps saying he is busy”…I’m ignoring him! He acts so surprised…
I am ignoring him cause he lives down the road from me but can never visit me
Genevieve Reindl damn that really sucks
Happen to be outside witb a guy looking really hot when you know he'll drive by or can see.( wink)
If that doesn't get his attention your not on his radar.
LMAO. What an ass he deserves dumping
@@DarrionVaughn No, it is the guys job. If he likes her, he will do something. No need to be a mind reader, it is common sense. Well not so common I guess for you males, it should be.
You're doing great sweetie
I once ignored a guy who didn’t value me, and it felt liberating. He eventually came back, but by then I had outgrown the situation.
A gave a guy 4 months of patience, he pulled out on x3 dates! Said he had huge walls built up , & I was to good to be true etc. Why did I even like him etc. In the end I had enough. He started to turn cruel for no reason . His lack of send esteem was getting me down. Good luck to him he’s going to need it . I was so dam patient with him. His loss.
Honestly I hate the chase. I don't do anything on purpose anymore. If I like a guy and he likes me I will give him my attention. If I don't like him I won't give him my attention. If I give him my attention and he takes it for granted, bye. But what annoys me most are the ones I ignore and continue to chase after me, and the ones when I move on they want my attention again. There's something about being uninterested that makes a guy really like you which baffles me because don't guys want to be with a girl that likes them?!? lmfao
I ignored a guy when he was trying to get laid after the third date and I wanted to wait because I had a feeling I am not his first choice. And I am glad I did it and he simply disappeared when I tried to contact him. I was able to avoid a disaster!
nice
When your fine ass ignores them lmfaoo
Sometimes we just have to let go. As for myself I have been taken care of myself and have been taken care of myself for the last three years. I was the one was looking for someone in places ,faces,and chasing . That was things I was going through . Bad time in my life and not putting myself through that anymore.
Treated me like an option so he'll get the same action.
I ignore toxicity point blank period. Bye, see ya.
I just match their energy now, i used to get bothered by being dismissed etc but now im just like, boy byeee. Next 😉
If you like him, ignore him and he calls your bluff he never liked you so why would you want to stay in that??
I started to ignore him because he pulled away I really don't have time for his mind games because he is that type of person..
It seems to me Elliott that in your opinion a guy is never in love. It's all calculated and how he fares in a relationship. And when his Eyes wonder he thinks "Did I do the right thing of sticking with her"?. You Man suffer from the " It's always greener on the other side" syndrome. I'm so sick of it.
Renate Lewis date women
Right--he never lasts in a relationship but is giving all his experience...
@@ShaunHensley why r u here? Learning tricks?
@@ShaunHensley I'll bet you couldn't even get a woman even if you would be more pleasant. LMAO!
Preach!
The answer he tries to give: the same things people truly may think period. There r no surprises in here. Elliot claims regret is a powerful emotion. ta ta.
I'm doing myself a favor by ignoring them. They can pursue me.
This is the second or even maybe the first time I see a guy making sense. You are good well done. Perfect for what I believe 👌
being chased is better then chasing
I wound up with a guy thinking I was ignoring him because my phone broke.
I managed to get back in touch we both had a good laugh.
I talk to this ex from time to time and later I ignore him. Cause he deserves it.
I don't pull away. I know that i deserve better and I just can't stand feeling like a second choice, second option. If things are want for me will meet me half way. other than that am prioritizing my time, my energy in something worth my happiness. Be strong out there ladies and don't be afraid to walk away and tou dint have to compromise your values to love someone who doesn't put much effort.
I just block and delete . That way, I dont even notice if Im the one thats been ghosted and I do me lol!
That is exactly what i did, i pulled away and i didn't tell him anything eventhough i found out things about him that are very true.
Women ignore them because they are no more interested, for me , no matter what they are trying to take me back, there’s no way I’m going back, because the fire is gone.
Nevr beg for everything... treat them same how they treat you..simple
I wouldn’t negotiate a man into committing because even if he decided to not let you get away AND GIVES YOU WHAT YOU WANT! When he’s starts to cheat , he will say “ I told you I wasn’t ready for a relationship “ !
6 weeks of negotiating his busy work schedule and now I am walking away. Thank you for this validating video. I'm free!
I only ignore people after they do not try and work on the relationship. Or treat me like i am a convenience. I let them know i am not happy with their behavior and try and see if we can fix the situation and if he doesn't understand commitment i am gone. They always regret it ... ALWAYS. I do not put up with bad behaviors.
I blocked him because he does this thing where everything is good and then he randomly gets moody and says or does some asshole, cold, or mean shit… (he’s a cancer). He’s super sweet, he’s a grown man, he works, own place, takes care of himself, takes care of me, motivates me, roots for me to succeed, but he’s done it about 3 times and each time i tell him it’s a trigger don’t do that. The other we were we playing around on the phone I told him to relax jokingly he was like apologize or you’re gonna get a punishment and I said no I’m not gonna apologize thinking we’re just joking around having fun and he deadass hung up on me. I find that to be extremely rude and disrespectful. Gave him like 10 minutes to text or call back, he didn’t so I blocked. First time doing it. I’m done talking. Don’t disrespect me. Hanging up the phone on me is a big deal to me because it triggers my abandonment issues. It’s been 2 nights… miss him but still cannot tolerate that. So the focus is back primarily on ME. when I’m supposed to, I’ll meet someone else, and someone even better.
Well I did it because I was ignored so just thought of mirroring his actions. I also have some self respect . I deserve better
Ignoring in form of showing that something is wrong is emotional abuse. If you said what is wrong and then ignore him, is so much better.
I didnt understand whats being said in the video. Girls do what YOU think is right at that moment. Ignore, pull away whatever . Nobody does anything create a drama unless one is hurt or has some problem with the situation and mostly guys KNOW why she is doing it.