We MUST UNLEARN what society has taught us & get back to the Basics of what the Bible says about relationship, I've tried it the world's way and there was no credibility, but when I released myself from the world ideologies is when I began to live my Blessed life. God's way has been Proven over and over.
This conversation was very necessary. Traditional dating, relationships, and marriage are alluding us as a society. We're now being taught convenience and preference. Let's take a step back and be who our Creator is calling us to be in these unions and covenants.
Yes. The society we live now.. uh. It becomes frustrating to think how we are such in a rush to do certain things, but when in reality we need to take our time in those specific areas. I'm learning every day, but good to know I'm not alone.
🗣🗣"STOP IDOLIZING MARRIAGE!" I am in DEEP gratitude for this episode. Taking time to develop ourselves and knowing we're only ready when we seek how we can serve another. I love everything about this conversation ❤
People need to stop idolizing certain people and things period. We tend to have idolize things period nowadays. There is a time and place for everything. I'm not going to get deep into that right now. Because most people only want to look at one or two things as being an issue. But there are countless things that need to be addressed.
I thought for a long time marriage is a goal of mine now I still want marriage but looking at things differently now to just be in a relationship isn’t enough if we are not helping each other to grow and become better together
That part about self love was so good to me. The problem for me is, I'm comfortable in my own skin and where I am in life to where it makes my family uncomfortable. I'm 27 and my family tells me constantly that I need to be careful because I'm too happy being alone. No, I just love who I am and where I am. And I won't be alone once that right fit to my life reveals themselves. When you love yourself, you don't compromise your peace anymore.
I agree with being intentional, however, how can a person jump straight to Courtship and learn to be friends as well? I do believe that bring friends first is very important, but if dating/courting is really on your mind, are you really being friends with them because there is a little motive. I needed a little more clarity on her comment Courting not dating yet friendship is important. Seems like a whole entire season/step is being missing or I misunderstood. Thanks!☺️
@@Ms.Cris421 I dont think a step is being missed at all. What I took from that is be ok with being a person friend and be careful about whom you are entering into relationships with, and so as to be careful of that it is a friendship. Courting comes after you get pass the friendship. As someone but it to me one day I need to know that I will like you. To me the intentional part is a whole part of that because you know what you want and need.
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥. A woman that has purpose beyond her career , I look for woman who has a relationship with God who is lead by Him and brings wisdom to the home , education is important but wisdom knowledge and understanding from the Throne room keeps all the blessings flowing . This is what I think a helpmate for me would vibe on my level . 🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊
You have a wrong understanding of the word helpmate. The creator did not give wisdom, knowledge and understanding to women. Those are attitude given to the person in the position of leadership; unless you are trying to say you are willing to be lead by a woman.
Damion Brown , women are made in Gods image . In Proverbs a certain woman had many different things going that made money . I would refer you to a teaching by Dr Myles Monroe about a woman’s roll in her mans life . Men are the seed ( ideas ) they come from the Father and we put them in the soil but before they sprout the soil must be good ground ( ie ) A godly woman ! To paraphrase , God gives a man an idea , the man talks to his wife and they pray and meditate on it , when conformation comes they begin the work together ! They have to agree because a house divided cannot stand ! 🕊
@@coreyhaga2623 you are reading a different Bible. Man was created in the image of God. Woman was created from Adam’s rib. When men listen to women that is what is referred to as the fall of man. The serpent is a symbol of earthly desires. A woman is the physical embodiment of earthly desires.
You guys nailed this on all levels. I loved all of the last points 1.) Find Purpose 2.)Sit in solitude 3.) Everything you do is a process to help us develop healthy perspective to grow and move forward in life. 4.) Healing is a journey and wholeness is a destination. Be patient with yourself. You all rock. Loved this.
Deep bow Queens and Kings. When I left the abusive relationship, I remember asking myself why. So I started the healing process. Part of the healing process was to start with my childhood truma, understanding my parents truma(that's also breaking generalizations curses). Learn how to be alone. While you're sitting with yourself work on yourself. You want to be whole when you God sends your mate. I can go on and on. It's work but it's worth it. Listen you might even lose some ppl on the way and you have to be ok with that. Everyone is not meant to go with you. Just trust the process. Sending healing and love.
1 year later this is so beautiful. Sometimes you have to experience the worst to understand your worth and how to sit in solute, love yourself and receive the bonus prize of a partner.
"What She Said, What He Heard" would be a great conversation as well. This was a great conversation and I loved that they ended with healing, perspective, and giving yourself grace. Keep going LaTerras. I believe expounding on marriage becoming an idol would be a great conversation to have as well, because a lot of people don't realize such is the case.
I don't care how many of these podcast I hear, I'm always learning something..a tool to use or something may rub me in away i need to recheck myself and make a change. 👏🏾👏🏾
What Elsa said..."courtship and intentionality"! Jay coming off the top of the dome in the beginning with a great question for Elsa! Love this off podcast!❤
The whole time I was thinking I know Laterras is back there biting his lip and trying not to run around the studio!! 😂😂 😂Jay saying something just confirmed it ! This was everything! ♥️
Some of the points make sense, others don’t. I wish we can stop thinking woman get dressed looking for men…. I get dressed, look in the mirror and if I’m happy with what I see, I don’t care if a man is. And this everyone needs counseling is so overrated. I mean YES, some do…. But it’s not a requirement to have a good life, relationships or marriage.
I screamed that my TV because I’ve been saying this...SAYING this for years!!!! YEARS! I had a few tears that just fell and crying isn’t my thing. I say all of that to say, all of what was said HAD TO BE SAID. Thank you for the honesty.
I'm not familiar with you but I will say that I totally valued your contribution to the conversation.. I usually talk to the screen to join in on the convo but you guys had me quiet..😳🤭🤭🥰.. yall were finishing my thoughts... I was like YYYAASSSSS BLACK PEOPLE!!!👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 It was sooo good to my SOUL... thank you for sharing yourself with us... it was a really good healthy conversation🖤🖤🖤
I was just thinking the same thing Greg was saying about finding a fit rather than molding the person to my life. It takes patience. Patience comes from 1st being content single. Which means learning yourself, loving yourself, knowing your value. Contentment for me comes from my personal relationship with God. I am at peace being single, because I have sought God to fill my needs and desires. Hopefully, I will get so good at that I will continue that in a marriage if God gives me the opportunity again. #DivorcedKnowledge
Amen! Right there with you. God is so amazing! Being in His presence and in relationship with Him brings so much peace. Loving ourselves for who He created us to be and not who the world wants to mold us into being is so necessary. After divorce my perspective changed to wanting what God wants for me… and I’m content in my singleness until the one He sends comes.
I have listened to this twice! Thanks to the entire panel, you guys are amazing and God is doing great things within you all. I needed to hear it all and sharing it most definitely. Thanks Terry 😊
Oh my GOD! This is such a necessary video. I've watched it 7 times because my soul needed it. I really appreciated all 4 of you: Greg. Yonci, Elsa, and Jay all speaking from a place of wholeness, hearing and listening to one another, and disagreeing respectfully. Greg you hit the nail on the head when you stated that our actions, and I will add, speech sometimes, and how we respond in relationships stem from childhood trauma. I definitely agree that healing is necessary for adults who suffer from childhood trauma. I also loved you stating that we have to be ok with saying someone is not the right person for us, knowing what we need for ourselves and in relationship, being willing to wait for it, and acknoweding the things that are not accessible to us, may be what we need. Very powerful. The mentioning of the struggle of a caterpillar in a cocoon perspective was everything. Thank you. Yonci I loved how you spoke on having self-love, getting a life, noting that even the strongest of us will feel a certain way when we are not chosen, (if we're not healed). Elsa, I too, don't watch much TV. I like your idea of not having images being put in our minds to tell us how we need to be or look. I too, made marriage an idol. And I had to repent for that. I really loved your explanation of valuing courtship as well. Jay, I appreciated you saying that healing is a journey. As a result, we need to be patient with ourselves. I see that I do have more work to do on me. I thank you all for encouraging therapy. Jay and/or Elsa I want to know how I could book counseling sessions with either of you? I know it would probably be via Zoom because I'm in Chicago. Or do either of you have a therapist that you would recommend here? Thank you in advance for your reply.
I concur with Yonci, regarding women being sexualized by various forms of social media, not just the Hip Hop culture. However, the hip-hop culture in my opinion does sensationalize the idea of " CREAM ( Cash Rules Everything Around Me) " which influences women to want to be selected to be seen. The fact is you attract what you are. If you want to be looked at respectfully and not sexually then present yourself as such. Where focus goes, energy flows. Be a magnet for Godliness, integrity, authenticity, honesty, and inner beauty.
"We need each other" - Jay Celebrating our differences, appreciating that we are all equal in God's eyes but different. It is those differences that makes us stronger. Complimenting our differences, filling in the gaps. Together we are better. Creating Union. An opportunity to connect with the one that you choose to love forever. This was an inspiring conversation.
10% of my lobola (dowry) is coming straight to you Mr Whitfield! That man must thank you😅 Such nutritional filled, much needed conversation❤🙌🏾🙏🏾 The ladies represented us well😍💯 Love love this. It felt too short 🥺 Thank you again guys wow!
@@ChasingYonci I was thinking of you just today, when I heard someone repeat what you said about chemistry not necessarily meaning people should date. Amongst other gems 💯❤
The issue is we keep trying to make our own rules in relationship The Bible gives us the role we are supposed to have in a relationship. But we keep trying to create our own ideas when the creator already gave us the instructions! I really enjoy this podcast!
Know your purpose. Solitude and learn yourself Perspective. What are you learning during this season of your life or what you have experienced or experiencing? Learn and grow
It sure does take a lot of work to learn how to love yourself but when you do it's such a gift and is refreshing because then your not desperate to be loved by a man your able to embrace the wait of being loved by a man not force yourself on just any man because your thirsty for love and to be accepted by someone else more than your able to accept yourself.
The wisdom flowing through this panel is very much respected! I thank God I found this channel. It’s helped me unlearn so much toxic thinking. I look forward to being an influencer one day. God Bless everyone!
The world definitely needs more people who can stand in their individuality with confidence and respect for other people's uniqueness. The conversation was great; the articulation was everything!!!
This is a great panel. You need self evolved individuals, with different view points to create genuine & honest dialogue. This is soo “LIT!” Great job Latterass!!! Absolutely enjoyed this!
I agree about being intentional. I also agree with dating = collecting data and that being tiring and overwhelming and just too much. Friendship is very important, but how will a person become friends without collecting data? Without getting to know them? Going straight to Courtship it appears that a step is missing because we haven't really become friends yet and now we are seriously, exclusively dating on the path of marriage. I just need additional clarification on her comment because maybe I misunderstood. ☺️
Collecting data is very necessary but it can also be harmful if you don’t handle it correctly…Don’t do “relationship things” in the collecting data phase. Meaning keep it to dates outside your person space, no sleepovers, etc. Anything that can emotionally attach someone to you during the “collecting data” phase can be harmful if you aren’t careful.
Yet another dose of wisdom shared by your guests. As always your podcast continues to assure us that there are resources available to us when we are ready and willing to do the work. This journey of self discovery and healing our wounds is not easy at all, we need all the help we can get, so thank you for this. May your podcast continue to grow to reach as many souls as possible, your future wifey included🙏
Purpose, solitude, purpose and therapy!!!!! This was rich, deep and good. Laterras, we will need part 2 with your lovely letter at the end. Thank you for another great episode. 🙏🏼👏
This was soothing to my spirit...now what do you do when you've gone to 3 therapist and THEY want to be your friend😒🤔?... like we laugh more than I get help... I've been told I got it but after watching the Dear Future Wifey podcast and being in solitude 2020 I knew what I was feeling that I didnt have it... I should have paid y'all on this podcast cause I got more help from the show than I did from all 3 of the therapist combined.. thanks for sharing you gifts with us... thanks Laterras for sharing you friends and encouraging them to do this for us🖤🙏🏽
This podcast was sooooo Powerful and needed. It was full of respectful substance. The biblical truths were also great because they are so foundational to life, relationships and love. 😊♥️ Thank you Laterras for presenting this great panel on your podcast.
I don’t think people don’t want to do the work. But I think the work is just too over bearing because there is no self work done before couples get married.
a collaboration not competition. in the right partnership, it will fit. love this conversation. We must understand who we are ourselves in order to know how you will fit with another.
Hello all 👋 Thank you Laterras, for a new episode. I look forward to listening to it. This sounds like a great idea, and thank you for bringing Christie and Jay back! I look forward to learning about the new guests as well.
Elsa was soooo on point with many of her views. She brought a wealth of wisdom into the conversation. I'd love to see a podcast on her initial comment. "I don't date" I think so many people need to understand how to get to that level in order to succeed in marriage. There's a wholeness that place exudes that many people can't see because it's such a foreign concept. But I agree with her, I'm too busy to not move on and in purpose. I don't date. I'm intentional and purposeful with who I spend time with. I don't need to just get outta the house. If I see the initial is going nowhere, let's not waste time....be intentional!
I had to share this before watching because I know the knowledge am about to get from this video is not for me alone am here to learn 🙌🏿 "You can have chemistry with so many people but that doesn't mean you are compatible"
I did the same thing, I shared it before even watching it because I saw the panel, Jay Barnett in particular. I saw him on Dear Future Wifey and his story was very inspiring.
This was soooooo goooood!!! Thank you so much guys for being part of offering sobeting alternative content to a lot of the poison we have doing the rounds about men, women and relationships. Media is soooooo powerful and we're blessed to have all of you showing up to share in this space. Laterras, you Sir, are the definition of a Kingdom powerhouse. Thank you soooooo much for stewarding you gift and space soooooo soooooo well. May God continue to bless and cover you and your family as your mission expands.
Great episode! I really liked what was said about men choosing differently when it comes to marriage. I think that's a topic that I'd like to see talked about on the show one day 🙂
This came out 8 months ago. Timing is amazing!!! This conversation is, was, and will always be necessary. This is incredibly important conversations we as adults seeking lasting permanent relationships leading to marriage if that's your desire should watch this. I thank you all for your wisdom and knowledge and passion for helping others and wanting to see us win in love. I needed to hear this!!! All of this!!! God bless you all 🤗🌻🌅 and THANK YOU AGAIN 😊
22:52 Yes Yonci! Powerful. A great read is by bell hooks, "Outlaw culture: resisting representations". 29:17 Wow. Speechless. Get it Yonci! 🙌🏾 25:12 Wow. Such a refreshing convo. Yassss, ya'll. I appreciate your authentic approaches to expectations, messaging and mindfulness. @Elsa, thank you for carving out self-perception and why we should be more aware of how we see ourselves in lieu of outside societal opinion. Deciding WHO I AM NOT, is indeed the first step. Thank you ALL for advancing the KINGDOM agenda!
Omg I'm so glad I came across this. I loved everyone's perspective and the conversation was just so healthy and needed in this society! Thank you! I thoroughly enjoyed this and will definitely share this with others!
Maaan you keep producing hits! I loved this. I need to learn how to make those sounds Jay was making!😂 But in the mean time until I do, here you go. BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOOM!😍😂
@@amandariley6946 I love having these convos. I’m always down for more. I actually host a UA-cam livestream on Sundays to discuss these sort of topics. So much to learn from one another.
The topic, contributions and, content were rich and, profound. Excellent hosts and, guest speakers. I'm looking forward to more of these, discussions. This was 'dope' indeed! I'm so looking forward, to more of these!
This is a great episode. I throughly enjoyed everyone’s perspective. I believe it takes seasoning to fully grasp and digest what they are truly saying. Thank you 🙏🏾
We MUST UNLEARN what society has taught us & get back to the Basics of what the Bible says about relationship, I've tried it the world's way and there was no credibility, but when I released myself from the world ideologies is when I began to live my Blessed life. God's way has been Proven over and over.
That's a word, Pamela. I totally agree.
Ok yall speaking speaking..love this conversation. Thank you
Perfectly said! The Bible simplify the answers on how to navigate every aspect of life. Our Father is Thee Ultimate Guide!
Amen!
FACTS!
“What’s available is not always what’s best for you” Facts‼️‼️
This conversation was very necessary. Traditional dating, relationships, and marriage are alluding us as a society. We're now being taught convenience and preference. Let's take a step back and be who our Creator is calling us to be in these unions and covenants.
Absolutely …
Yes. The society we live now.. uh. It becomes frustrating to think how we are such in a rush to do certain things, but when in reality we need to take our time in those specific areas. I'm learning every day, but good to know I'm not alone.
@@captionsofgrace It's all a process and we have to trust it
@@chrisparker6249 thanks I'm trying. It can be discouraging. I'm believing it will happen.
@@captionsofgrace I agree, it is challenging but we find strength in Him. We have to trust His process, not ours. You'll get there🙏💕👑
🗣🗣"STOP IDOLIZING MARRIAGE!" I am in DEEP gratitude for this episode. Taking time to develop ourselves and knowing we're only ready when we seek how we can serve another. I love everything about this conversation ❤
That’s so great! Thanks for the feedback! 🙏🏾
People need to stop idolizing certain people and things period. We tend to have idolize things period nowadays. There is a time and place for everything. I'm not going to get deep into that right now. Because most people only want to look at one or two things as being an issue. But there are countless things that need to be addressed.
I thought for a long time marriage is a goal of mine now I still want marriage but looking at things differently now to just be in a relationship isn’t enough if we are not helping each other to grow and become better together
Right it’s just to much
🗣️🗣️🗣️
That part about self love was so good to me. The problem for me is, I'm comfortable in my own skin and where I am in life to where it makes my family uncomfortable. I'm 27 and my family tells me constantly that I need to be careful because I'm too happy being alone. No, I just love who I am and where I am. And I won't be alone once that right fit to my life reveals themselves. When you love yourself, you don't compromise your peace anymore.
How a man chooses and how he marries is 2 different things!!!! Succinctly accurate😃🤷🏽♀️
HEALING AND WHOLENESS ARE 2 DIFFERENT THINGS, HEALING IS IN THE JOURNEY WHOLENESS IS THE DESTINATION
💯💯💯
I love that!
Speaaaaaaaaaak!
Agreed!!!
I am with Elsa, be intentional. I dont have time for the playing around. Friendship is so important
I agree with being intentional, however, how can a person jump straight to Courtship and learn to be friends as well? I do believe that bring friends first is very important, but if dating/courting is really on your mind, are you really being friends with them because there is a little motive. I needed a little more clarity on her comment Courting not dating yet friendship is important. Seems like a whole entire season/step is being missing or I misunderstood. Thanks!☺️
@@Ms.Cris421 I dont think a step is being missed at all. What I took from that is be ok with being a person friend and be careful about whom you are entering into relationships with, and so as to be careful of that it is a friendship. Courting comes after you get pass the friendship. As someone but it to me one day I need to know that I will like you. To me the intentional part is a whole part of that because you know what you want and need.
Same here 🙌🏾
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥. A woman that has purpose beyond her career , I look for woman who has a relationship with God who is lead by Him and brings wisdom to the home , education is important but wisdom knowledge and understanding from the Throne room keeps all the blessings flowing . This is what I think a helpmate for me would vibe on my level . 🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊🕊
Facts!
Glad to gain the knowledge that their are still people out there that still think that way.
You have a wrong understanding of the word helpmate. The creator did not give wisdom, knowledge and understanding to women. Those are attitude given to the person in the position of leadership; unless you are trying to say you are willing to be lead by a woman.
Damion Brown , women are made in Gods image . In Proverbs a certain woman had many different things going that made money . I would refer you to a teaching by Dr Myles Monroe about a woman’s roll in her mans life . Men are the seed ( ideas ) they come from the Father and we put them in the soil but before they sprout the soil must be good ground ( ie ) A godly woman ! To paraphrase , God gives a man an idea , the man talks to his wife and they pray and meditate on it , when conformation comes they begin the work together ! They have to agree because a house divided cannot stand ! 🕊
@@coreyhaga2623 you are reading a different Bible. Man was created in the image of God. Woman was created from Adam’s rib. When men listen to women that is what is referred to as the fall of man. The serpent is a symbol of earthly desires. A woman is the physical embodiment of earthly desires.
You guys nailed this on all levels. I loved all of the last points
1.) Find Purpose 2.)Sit in solitude 3.) Everything you do is a process to help us develop healthy perspective to grow and move forward in life. 4.) Healing is a journey and wholeness is a destination. Be patient with yourself. You all rock. Loved this.
I heard somewhere that marriage is not an achievement it’s a call to duty! That was powerful!
Oooh! Love that!
Its not a competion, it's a collaboration that complements the unity
❤️❤️❤️
Deep bow Queens and Kings. When I left the abusive relationship, I remember asking myself why. So I started the healing process. Part of the healing process was to start with my childhood truma, understanding my parents truma(that's also breaking generalizations curses). Learn how to be alone. While you're sitting with yourself work on yourself. You want to be whole when you God sends your mate. I can go on and on. It's work but it's worth it. Listen you might even lose some ppl on the way and you have to be ok with that. Everyone is not meant to go with you. Just trust the process. Sending healing and love.
1 year later this is so beautiful. Sometimes you have to experience the worst to understand your worth and how to sit in solute, love yourself and receive the bonus prize of a partner.
"What She Said, What He Heard" would be a great conversation as well. This was a great conversation and I loved that they ended with healing, perspective, and giving yourself grace. Keep going LaTerras. I believe expounding on marriage becoming an idol would be a great conversation to have as well, because a lot of people don't realize such is the case.
Excellent points Shalondria!
Purpose ... Solitude ... Perspective ... Healing is a journey and WHOLENESS is the destination! 🙌🙏
I don't care how many of these podcast I hear, I'm always learning something..a tool to use or something may rub me in away i need to recheck myself and make a change. 👏🏾👏🏾
Amen! Stay on this journey
What Elsa said..."courtship and intentionality"! Jay coming off the top of the dome in the beginning with a great question for Elsa! Love this off podcast!❤
What Elsa said about marriage being made into an idol is so true!! I’m so glad she said that!!
This need to be a monthly session !!!
The whole time I was thinking I know Laterras is back there biting his lip and trying not to run around the studio!! 😂😂 😂Jay saying something just confirmed it ! This was everything! ♥️
Hilarious!!!!
Ha Ha Ha I know it was hard for him to be silent behind the camera. LOL
Some of the points make sense, others don’t. I wish we can stop thinking woman get dressed looking for men…. I get dressed, look in the mirror and if I’m happy with what I see, I don’t care if a man is. And this everyone needs counseling is so overrated. I mean YES, some do…. But it’s not a requirement to have a good life, relationships or marriage.
I screamed that my TV because I’ve been saying this...SAYING this for years!!!! YEARS! I had a few tears that just fell and crying isn’t my thing. I say all of that to say, all of what was said HAD TO BE SAID. Thank you for the honesty.
Wow!! ❤️ So glad it resonated with you!!
It was fun having this discussion. Thanks for opening your platform to us, Laterras. ❤️❤️
Thanks for being such an amazing guest.
@@DearFutureWifey My pleasure!
I'm not familiar with you but I will say that I totally valued your contribution to the conversation.. I usually talk to the screen to join in on the convo but you guys had me quiet..😳🤭🤭🥰.. yall were finishing my thoughts... I was like YYYAASSSSS BLACK PEOPLE!!!👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 It was sooo good to my SOUL... thank you for sharing yourself with us... it was a really good healthy conversation🖤🖤🖤
@@donnagranderson514 This made my day! Thank you, sweetie!!! ❤️
I need someone to unpack this with on rewind, pause, and discuss 🤔 many thoughts.
That’s actually a great idea! You down, Laterras? 😊
Yap!!
Yes me too!
Exactly. It is loaded. Expounding will also be a blessing to others and ourselves. Let's give it a shot
I agree
I was ready to listen to this conversation for another hour 💯
Elsa is literally wisdom in a nutshell. I love her❤️ So many profound truths throughout this entire discussion!
I was just thinking the same thing Greg was saying about finding a fit rather than molding the person to my life. It takes patience. Patience comes from 1st being content single. Which means learning yourself, loving yourself, knowing your value. Contentment for me comes from my personal relationship with God. I am at peace being single, because I have sought God to fill my needs and desires. Hopefully, I will get so good at that I will continue that in a marriage if God gives me the opportunity again. #DivorcedKnowledge
Amen! Right there with you. God is so amazing! Being in His presence and in relationship with Him brings so much peace. Loving ourselves for who He created us to be and not who the world wants to mold us into being is so necessary. After divorce my perspective changed to wanting what God wants for me… and I’m content in my singleness until the one He sends comes.
So true 🙌🏿
Absolutely Awesome!
"What do you need from me today?" Powerful! Thank you Elsa. You just taught me something new to bring to my marriage.
I have listened to this twice! Thanks to the entire panel, you guys are amazing and God is doing great things within you all. I needed to hear it all and sharing it most definitely. Thanks Terry 😊
Oh my GOD! This is such a necessary video. I've watched it 7 times because my soul needed it. I really appreciated all 4 of you: Greg. Yonci, Elsa, and Jay all speaking from a place of wholeness, hearing and listening to one another, and disagreeing respectfully. Greg you hit the nail on the head when you stated that our actions, and I will add, speech sometimes, and how we respond in relationships stem from childhood trauma. I definitely agree that healing is necessary for adults who suffer from childhood trauma. I also loved you stating that we have to be ok with saying someone is not the right person for us, knowing what we need for ourselves and in relationship, being willing to wait for it, and acknoweding the things that are not accessible to us, may be what we need. Very powerful. The mentioning of the struggle of a caterpillar in a cocoon perspective was everything. Thank you. Yonci I loved how you spoke on having self-love, getting a life, noting that even the strongest of us will feel a certain way when we are not chosen, (if we're not healed). Elsa, I too, don't watch much TV. I like your idea of not having images being put in our minds to tell us how we need to be or look. I too, made marriage an idol. And I had to repent for that. I really loved your explanation of valuing courtship as well. Jay, I appreciated you saying that healing is a journey. As a result, we need to be patient with ourselves. I see that I do have more work to do on me. I thank you all for encouraging therapy. Jay and/or Elsa I want to know how I could book counseling sessions with either of you? I know it would probably be via Zoom because I'm in Chicago. Or do either of you have a therapist that you would recommend here? Thank you in advance for your reply.
I concur with Yonci, regarding women being sexualized by various forms of social media, not just the Hip Hop culture. However, the hip-hop culture in my opinion does sensationalize the idea of " CREAM ( Cash Rules Everything Around Me) " which influences women to want to be selected to be seen. The fact is you attract what you are. If you want to be looked at respectfully and not sexually then present yourself as such. Where focus goes, energy flows. Be a magnet for Godliness, integrity, authenticity, honesty, and inner beauty.
"We need each other" - Jay
Celebrating our differences, appreciating that we are all equal in God's eyes but different. It is those differences that makes us stronger.
Complimenting our differences, filling in the gaps. Together we are better.
Creating Union. An opportunity to connect with the one that you choose to love forever.
This was an inspiring conversation.
Thank you! 🙏🏾
Yea so much better than those platforms that bash each-other genders
@@sg5720 Thank you! Really glad you enjoyed it!
These discussions get me so excited about my next relationship to come. I feel better equipped to serve.
Wow! Thank you for this raw, thought-provoking conversation!!🙏
Absolutely, Elsa ... Dueces. When you know you don't ENTERTAIN longer than you need too.
10% of my lobola (dowry) is coming straight to you Mr Whitfield! That man must thank you😅
Such nutritional filled, much needed conversation❤🙌🏾🙏🏾
The ladies represented us well😍💯
Love love this.
It felt too short 🥺
Thank you again guys wow!
That's hilarious. 😅🤣😂 Tell your future husband he needs to send 10% to me! Lol
@@DearFutureWifey 🤣🤣definitely
So glad you enjoyed it!! Ha Ha
@@ChasingYonci I was thinking of you just today, when I heard someone repeat what you said about chemistry not necessarily meaning people should date. Amongst other gems 💯❤
@@nosiphopakamile8972 Love it!! ❤️❤️
This is good for single people.
People are struggling with their baggage and the current society is not healing
❤️❤️❤️ Thanks!! Really glad to hear it.
Great job Laterras! Love seeing Jay in action and Yonci's energy clicks so well with this platform. Greg added so much value to the conversation.
Thank you!! ❤️ Warms my heart to know folks enjoyed this episode.
Laterras, I love this idea! This needed to be addressed. This topic was 🔥🔥🔥🔥‼️
❤️❤️❤️
Yonci is very wise...I especially enjoyed her ability to break it down and speak to the heart of the matter.
Thank you so much!! Means a lot. ❤️
I agree!!
@@ChasingYonci I just subscribed to your Channel!☺️
@@Ms.Cris421 Thank you, luv!!
The issue is we keep trying to make our own rules in relationship The Bible gives us the role we are supposed to have in a relationship. But we keep trying to create our own ideas when the creator already gave us the instructions! I really enjoy this podcast!
🎯
Excellent podcast. Each panelist kept it LIT. #learning
Know your purpose.
Solitude and learn yourself
Perspective. What are you learning during this season of your life or what you have experienced or experiencing? Learn and grow
Healing is a journey and WHOLENESS is the destination
Thoroughly enjoyed it.
that's the hard part. If I'm at such peace single, I don't want to disrupt that peace in the name of being in a relationship.
I really like the salt analogy that Yonci shared
So did I. It was a good one.
I felt that 👌🏾
I agree with you, the best analogy ever.
Thank you, ladies!!! ❤️❤️
BTW: I did an entire video on dating without titles.
It sure does take a lot of work to learn how to love yourself but when you do it's such a gift and is refreshing because then your not desperate to be loved by a man your able to embrace the wait of being loved by a man not force yourself on just any man because your thirsty for love and to be accepted by someone else more than your able to accept yourself.
The wisdom flowing through this panel is very much respected! I thank God I found this channel. It’s helped me unlearn so much toxic thinking. I look forward to being an influencer one day. God Bless everyone!
I am watching this for the first time and really love it . All couples should see this. Whether you are planning to get married or you are married.
How a man chooses and how he marries is different 😮!! @Jay Barnett. Powerful gems 💎
U see that peace and being humble omg your relationship will go far
The world definitely needs more people who can stand in their individuality with confidence and respect for other people's uniqueness. The conversation was great; the articulation was everything!!!
This is a great panel. You need self evolved individuals, with different view points to create genuine & honest dialogue. This is soo “LIT!” Great job Latterass!!! Absolutely enjoyed this!
Well said!
This is the best and healthiest conversation I’ve heard between men and women in a long time.
I love what Elsa said about intentionality and pursing friendship. The “collecting data” phase can be tiring.
I agree about being intentional. I also agree with dating = collecting data and that being tiring and overwhelming and just too much. Friendship is very important, but how will a person become friends without collecting data? Without getting to know them? Going straight to Courtship it appears that a step is missing because we haven't really become friends yet and now we are seriously, exclusively dating on the path of marriage. I just need additional clarification on her comment because maybe I misunderstood. ☺️
Collecting data is very necessary but it can also be harmful if you don’t handle it correctly…Don’t do “relationship things” in the collecting data phase. Meaning keep it to dates outside your person space, no sleepovers, etc. Anything that can emotionally attach someone to you during the “collecting data” phase can be harmful if you aren’t careful.
"I may not need it in a general sense but I need it from you." Wow Greg!
The heart speaks.
Please guys let the conversations continue. This was very insightful
Yet another dose of wisdom shared by your guests. As always your podcast continues to assure us that there are resources available to us when we are ready and willing to do the work.
This journey of self discovery and healing our wounds is not easy at all, we need all the help we can get, so thank you for this.
May your podcast continue to grow to reach as many souls as possible, your future wifey included🙏
Purpose, solitude, purpose and therapy!!!!!
This was rich, deep and good. Laterras, we will need part 2 with your lovely letter at the end. Thank you for
another great episode. 🙏🏼👏
Glad you enjoyed it!
This was soothing to my spirit...now what do you do when you've gone to 3 therapist and THEY want to be your friend😒🤔?... like we laugh more than I get help... I've been told I got it but after watching the Dear Future Wifey podcast and being in solitude 2020 I knew what I was feeling that I didnt have it... I should have paid y'all on this podcast cause I got more help from the show than I did from all 3 of the therapist combined.. thanks for sharing you gifts with us... thanks Laterras for sharing you friends and encouraging them to do this for us🖤🙏🏽
This was truly amazing… the conversation had me nodding my head in agreement. Thank you Latteras…❤️
This podcast was sooooo Powerful and needed. It was full of respectful substance. The biblical truths were also great because they are so foundational to life, relationships and love. 😊♥️ Thank you Laterras for presenting this great panel on your podcast.
He is amazing. I was honored to be a part of it.
I like Elsa…“Guard your gates”. Great podcast and panel. Thank you.
I don’t think people don’t want to do the work. But I think the work is just too over bearing because there is no self work done before couples get married.
Before he corrected them he gave 4 positive affirmations! How does God move PRAISE Acknowledgement! Come on now you betta preach!! So good.
We need to hear more of these talks, it really helps me tremendously! Thank you so much!
a collaboration not competition. in the right partnership, it will fit. love this conversation. We must understand who we are ourselves in order to know how you will fit with another.
Hello all 👋 Thank you Laterras, for a new episode. I look forward to listening to it. This sounds like a great idea, and thank you for bringing Christie and Jay back! I look forward to learning about the new guests as well.
❤️❤️
Wonderful Episode. I look forward to the next “Off the Podcast”. Great job Elsa, Jay, Yonci & Greg.
Thank you, luv!!!
Elsa was soooo on point with many of her views. She brought a wealth of wisdom into the conversation. I'd love to see a podcast on her initial comment. "I don't date" I think so many people need to understand how to get to that level in order to succeed in marriage. There's a wholeness that place exudes that many people can't see because it's such a foreign concept. But I agree with her, I'm too busy to not move on and in purpose. I don't date. I'm intentional and purposeful with who I spend time with. I don't need to just get outta the house. If I see the initial is going nowhere, let's not waste time....be intentional!
Communication is key & it's so much more than talking/speaking....they hit alot of tangible points 💯⭐🔥
I had to share this before watching because I know the knowledge am about to get from this video is not for me alone am here to learn 🙌🏿
"You can have chemistry with so many people but that doesn't mean you are compatible"
Thank you
I did the same thing, I shared it before even watching it because I saw the panel, Jay Barnett in particular. I saw him on Dear Future Wifey and his story was very inspiring.
That part 🙌🏾 shared on my WhatsApp network ✊🏾
That's a Wrap for real! Anything besides intention wastes my energy which I value just as much if not more than my time!
This is straight Fire!!🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥Yesssss Guard your gates (eyes, ears) protect what you allow into your heart!!! Learn to Love and Value Yourself First ~
This was soooooo goooood!!! Thank you so much guys for being part of offering sobeting alternative content to a lot of the poison we have doing the rounds about men, women and relationships. Media is soooooo powerful and we're blessed to have all of you showing up to share in this space.
Laterras, you Sir, are the definition of a Kingdom powerhouse. Thank you soooooo much for stewarding you gift and space soooooo soooooo well. May God continue to bless and cover you and your family as your mission expands.
❤️❤️❤️ Amazing!!!
This conversation was sooooo good! Thank you to everyone!! ❤️🔥❤️#gems💎
Great episode! I really liked what was said about men choosing differently when it comes to marriage. I think that's a topic that I'd like to see talked about on the show one day 🙂
Yes! This was good, I would love to dive deeper into this topic.
Same here! I would love to hear more on that! “Men choose differently when it comes to marriage”. 🤔
This came out 8 months ago. Timing is amazing!!! This conversation is, was, and will always be necessary. This is incredibly important conversations we as adults seeking lasting permanent relationships leading to marriage if that's your desire should watch this. I thank you all for your wisdom and knowledge and passion for helping others and wanting to see us win in love. I needed to hear this!!! All of this!!! God bless you all 🤗🌻🌅 and THANK YOU AGAIN 😊
This was great! Thanks for confirmation that me being alone at this time is the right move!
22:52 Yes Yonci! Powerful. A great read is by bell hooks, "Outlaw culture: resisting representations". 29:17 Wow. Speechless. Get it Yonci! 🙌🏾 25:12 Wow. Such a refreshing convo. Yassss, ya'll. I appreciate your authentic approaches to expectations, messaging and mindfulness. @Elsa, thank you for carving out self-perception and why we should be more aware of how we see ourselves in lieu of outside societal opinion. Deciding WHO I AM NOT, is indeed the first step. Thank you ALL for advancing the KINGDOM agenda!
Thank you, luv!! Really glad it resonated with you. All glory to God. ❤️
@@ChasingYonci Amin.
So insightful I loved this episode 🌼watching from Zambia 🇿🇲
Great dialogue!! I loved the panelists’ chemistry. Would love to see them do this again! 💗
Healing is a process.
And Wholeness is the destination!!!
@@Rach706 Yes ma'am so true.
"Manage my expectations." Phenomenal truth. Thank you Jay!
Omg I'm so glad I came across this. I loved everyone's perspective and the conversation was just so healthy and needed in this society! Thank you! I thoroughly enjoyed this and will definitely share this with others!
Hands up one of the Best segments on the tube!!!!!🙏🙏🙏❣❣❣❣❣
Maaan you keep producing hits! I loved this. I need to learn how to make those sounds Jay was making!😂 But in the mean time until I do, here you go. BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOOM!😍😂
First 10 minutes....and it’s ALREADY 🔥!!! Good STUFF ALREADY!
I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation. I wanted more though 😁. Great work Laterras 👏🏽
That’s so sweet. We felt like 40 min was so long and made sure we wrapped it up.
@@ChasingYonci it didn’t feel like 40 minutes at all. I hope there’s a part 2 in the future 😊
@@amandariley6946 I love having these convos. I’m always down for more. I actually host a UA-cam livestream on Sundays to discuss these sort of topics. So much to learn from one another.
"Your experiences shape your belief system. Your belief system creates your patterns. And your patterns form your habits." This is so true!
The topic, contributions and, content were rich and, profound. Excellent hosts and, guest speakers. I'm looking forward to more of these, discussions. This was 'dope' indeed! I'm so looking forward, to more of these!
Love this platform
When each person is mentally healthy individually then the union stands strong. Understanding AND Communication is the 🗝️ key.
Yonci made a good point about self love...it is a journey one must make. It is opening that pandora's box and dealing with self first.
Wonderful people in here, we want more of this stuff ....thank you LRW👏🏾👏🏾
This is a great episode. I throughly enjoyed everyone’s perspective. I believe it takes seasoning to fully grasp and digest what they are truly saying. Thank you 🙏🏾
🙏🏾
EXCELLENT Episode!!! I’ve shared and listened and discussed all of this with friends. Thank you to each of you!!
This is GENIUS!! FOUR different perspectives. # PURPOSE
Word: not having what’s available is key!
Absolutely loved this and so much resonates with me. There is no real title except for fiancé and wife. PERIOD 👏🏽👏🏽
Powerful! I love this! I can have these conversations all day! Great perspective from each guest!
Thank you! ❤️
This is one of the, if not Thee smoothest conversations I've heard EVA! Well done
🔥🔥🔥 we definitely need these conversations
Relationship is about servitude👏👏