Opus 313 And while he keeps throwing out distractions to keep himself in the limelight, Bernie Sanders, is climbing higher in the polls. Trump and the MSM would love nothing more, than to ignore it, While pushing their last corporate, owned Hope Corporate Pete.
Just let him play with the phone .. keeps him occupied.. oh, and make sure he has snacks .. no tv after 8 tho and strict 10pm bedtime .... there's a note on the fridge if you forget .. and I'll be home by 11 ....
To be honest, after the NATO summit and Trudeau making fun of him, I'm surprised trump hasn't yet announced he's going to invade Canada or at least build a wall on the border with Canada...
@@carolinemaybe Actually I was threatened just the other day, "you'll be in a camp by the end of 2020" these people are ready to attack their neighbors for him ...frig-gin lunatic's.
Jarod Gordon ....their hilarity is the only thing that’s keeping me from going insane! Trump is brain dead 💀....the White House is literally a freak show!
I, have big hands! So I can tell you, his tiny hands are made for these smartphone keys! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 And most of the kids I know have bigger hands than Captain Stupid!
Throwing impeachment around for those reasons, is wrong. Those are reasons to vote him out, but impeachment is for high crimes and misdemeanors. Being an idiot is neither.
Ageism is as dumb as racism. Proud boomer for Bernie! No age, gender or skin color has an exclusive on stupidity, plenty of mislead folks of ALL ages still support tRump.
No it's a children's book so I have them both at a meeting in Kansas when a tornado sweeps them both up and drops them in a land called Oz where the dotard is granted a brain and Rocket Man gets a heart. Neither of them acquire any courage though just to be on the safe side.
I am pretty sure Lincoln can defeat Trump in a fight, if you guys didn't know, Lincoln was a Lawyer, a Surveyor, a licensed bartender and A PROFESSIONAL WRESTLER.
Trump talks so often about himself in third person, that it is not clear who he really was talking about. But most of the time he always talks about himself. 😉
Colbert is possibly the most linguistically talented man I have ever had the pleasure of listening to. Especially when we have such an illiterate in the White House. H
@@kdgc6217 North Korea said pretty soon they might have to call Trump a "dotard again" lol and also that Trump is what was it... An old man who has lost his whits or something to that effect
@Agent Fungus I've only ever been to county but from what I witnessed while in jail, there isn't much you can't get in there for enough soup or honey buns.
Twitter's reputation is "never" going to recover from Donald Trump's taint on the brand after he's gone for good. Never will anyone hear "Twitter" and not think of Donald Trump's flabby visage ever again. Never.
Nothing to do with him not being able to get on the golf course, due to the fall that took him to Walter Reed for his emergency "annual medical" evaluation.
"We refuse to negotiate with this poltroonish loitersack; this wiffle-waffle fustylugs, who doesn't have the sense of a ninnyhammer, you gilly, wetfoot fribble!" So, you've been talking to Jacob Rees-Mogg, I see...
@san juanita cruz It's a foolish person. While you never hear the full phrase anymore, some older people in the UK still might say 'Oh, you ninny!' or "Oh, what a ninny I've been!" when they perhaps have forgotten something important, mixed things up, or made a mistake in complicated instructions.
The phrasing of that North Korean threat to call him "Dotard" again makes me think of the French Knights in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. "Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!"
? You mean his job? Man, you can't please you republicans. Always hollering that Democrats don't work, but mad when they do. Make up your mind, Russia!
Unfortunately, what is going on is no better than "internal affairs" investigating any police incident regarding the wrong doing of said public service person. That being said, on with the show?
105 tweets & retweets in 1 day!
He has nothing better to do?
Or maybe we should be happy he's busy with the phone and not something else!
I think they're keeping him distracted.
Fir reel
Opus 313 And while he keeps throwing out distractions to keep himself in the limelight,
Bernie Sanders, is climbing higher in the polls. Trump and the MSM would love nothing more, than to ignore it, While pushing their last corporate, owned Hope Corporate Pete.
Just let him play with the phone .. keeps him occupied.. oh, and make sure he has snacks .. no tv after 8 tho and strict 10pm bedtime .... there's a note on the fridge if you forget .. and I'll be home by 11 ....
To be honest, after the NATO summit and Trudeau making fun of him, I'm surprised trump hasn't yet announced he's going to invade Canada or at least build a wall on the border with Canada...
What scares me is that people genuinely love this guy!
Coz Colbert is loveable...
... but if you meant Trump, damn.
They don’t love him they idolise him. They are ready to take up arms for him. It’s terrifying. Go to any Fox vid and read the comments.
@Airik Luna Cults never end well. 😐
@@carolinemaybe Actually I was threatened just the other day, "you'll be in a camp by the end of 2020" these people are ready to attack their neighbors for him ...frig-gin lunatic's.
They love tRump like tRump loves our flag. Falsely. They are using what they can before he deflates. They are taking advantage of a sick president.
Stephen Colbert. Seth Meyers. Trevor Noah. John Oliver. Hasan Minhaj. Bill Maher. Samantha Bee. Making current events tolerable and eye-opening.
Jarod Gordon ....their hilarity is the only thing that’s keeping me from going insane! Trump is brain dead 💀....the White House is literally a freak show!
Until the dotard-in-chief bans them .
Not Fallon though he’s shit
His tiny hands must be exhausted.
From stroking his own micropenis LOL
@@genghiskhan9269 LMAO 😂
He dictates the tweets. He’s a dictator.
I, have big hands! So I can tell you, his tiny hands are made for these smartphone keys! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 And most of the kids I know have bigger hands than Captain Stupid!
Trump's hands?
Being incompetent and not doing one's duty is enough ground for impeachment.
Throwing impeachment around for those reasons, is wrong. Those are reasons to vote him out, but impeachment is for high crimes and misdemeanors. Being an idiot is neither.
No golf for Declining Donnie since his panic attack two weeks ago.
Trump is living proof that baby boomers can also have an unhealthy relationship with social media.
Yea, boomers are known for loving modern technology
Ok Miller (kidding)
Ageism is as dumb as racism.
Proud boomer for Bernie!
No age, gender or skin color has an exclusive on stupidity, plenty of mislead folks of ALL ages still support tRump.
baby boomers are KNOWN for having an unhealthy relationship with social media.... how tf does your comment have 100 likes...?
As a boomer I agree
"Dah' Nile is a river Trump couldn't find on a map."
That is a well written joke.
In Dublin we often say "Do us a favour" while meaning "Do me a favour".
This is so hilarious I swear to God I think my life is going to be a lot better now
Have a wonderful week!
🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
It will. We will all grow
@Thrasymachus Monk Some out will only grow and retract in our pants
The only lesson the government and the society learn from history is they never learn from it--G.W.F. Hegel
Oh dang. That is a good one. Reminds me of "War is God's way of teaching Americans geography."
@@allyourcode I love that one!
I'm working on a new childrens book called The Rocket Man and the Dotard.
I'd like to read it. I'm personally thinking of a browser/mobile game.
Does it end in tears and a tantrum?
Just post a link when its published..so we can support it! 😃
No it's a children's book so I have them both at a meeting in Kansas when a tornado sweeps them both up and drops them in a land called Oz where the dotard is granted a brain and Rocket Man gets a heart. Neither of them acquire any courage though just to be on the safe side.
Gary Neudorf sounds great, but I wouldn’t use a nickname that Trump came up with
105 tweets is directly proportionate to him flushing 15 times a day : case solved!
I am pretty sure Lincoln can defeat Trump in a fight, if you guys didn't know, Lincoln was a Lawyer, a Surveyor, a licensed bartender and A PROFESSIONAL WRESTLER.
Rohan Navalkar you forgot vampire slayer. It is true though that he was known to be a pretty badass wrestler.
Unlike WWF clowns, he was a REAL wrestler.
@@kruleworld Why does everything say WWF is a wrestling organisation. It's WWE that is know for wrestling. WWF is World Wildlife Fund.
@@Tedinator01 shh🤐 nobody should know about that. It's confidential. How did you find out about it.
Rohan Navalkar ....my miniature dachshund,Lily, could beat Trump! She goes for the jugular....
Trump talks so often about himself in third person, that it is not clear who he really was talking about. But most of the time he always talks about himself. 😉
He’s distancing himself from himself.
"I don't know the man very well, I hardly know him."
Which will lead us to believe he has multiple personalities
Bob Dole also did that.
Recall the Jimmy dude in Seinfeld.
3:36 Is the funniest thing I’ve seen in a while. Rudy is the gift that keeps on giving.
"Me, me, me. Everyone wants to be like ME. That's why they even had a MeToo movement involving many of my former staff."
"I really try very hard to be [...] always legal..."
Obvious liar is obvious.
3:16 Rudy discovering the only thing that wasn't covered up was Stormy Daniels.
Colbert is possibly the most linguistically talented man I have ever had the pleasure of listening to. Especially when we have such an illiterate in the White House.
H
*WE ARE THE NORTH KOREANS WHO SAY DOTARD!*
*FETCH US.... A TRADE AGREEMENT! A NICE ONE.*
*OR WE SHALL SAY DOTARD...AGAIN!*
Ah! The Knights who say 'Dotard' sketch... 😊 ...🌳🌳🌳🚀 🌳🌳🌳
There's always room for a bit of Python.
Dear diary,
I couldn't agree with North Korea more.
- December 10, 20thelastyearever
What a time to be alive, huh?
Savage but well done.xx
I can't stop laughing! This is EPIC. What has happened??????
@@kdgc6217 North Korea said pretty soon they might have to call Trump a "dotard again" lol and also that Trump is what was it... An old man who has lost his whits or something to that effect
Harmonic Rain Sounds like the love affair is over. Here comes the nasty breakup. Hold on tight!
Now I know why so many people wanted to move to Canada 3 years ago.
America is the laughing stock of the world, well done Donnie
"I may not be much, but I'm all I think about"
Solid SWC flash back
7
3:39 what just happened? That's the look I get on my face when I realise I went to work without pants again
North Korea has some genuinely hilarious burns.
Phones are not allowed to prisoners.He'll have to write letters instead.
You never heard of the keister bunny? K.🐰=😦😧😨😰🎇💦 💩🙌🗣🤳
Letters? Can do
Words and sentences? 🤔
Oh oh!
Big block letters, joined up writing comes later.
@Agent Fungus I've only ever been to county but from what I witnessed while in jail, there isn't much you can't get in there for enough soup or honey buns.
I'm surprised Trump didn't spell United States wrong 😄😄😄
thanks to autocorrect which he actually has to override to spell that poorly
Maybe not, but he does pronounce it in a 'unique' way...
The United Shtatesh...🙃
@@YusufGinnah True So he is the President of the United Shtesh 🤪
"I looked into Ukraine, because..."
"I need to set up a safe house somewhere outside the U.S."
1:34 That joke should have been "because me all me thinks about."
3:15 Rudy GHUOLIANI🧟♂️ - still laughing...😂😂😂
Twitter's reputation is "never" going to recover from Donald Trump's taint on the brand after he's gone for good.
Never will anyone hear "Twitter" and not think of Donald Trump's flabby visage ever again.
Never.
Please don’t ever speak of Donald Trump’s taint again....*shudder*
Doesn't bother me, I never use Twitter anyway. Especially with Bronzer Boy whining all over it like a tragic little drama queen.
You've obviously never considered that these people on TV could be lying to you but you've never tried to consider that because it is happening
Thanks for sharing the 'Rocky' image. How I wish I hadn't just eaten....
Could have been worse, you could be sitting down to eat, then completely lost your appetite!
3:05 I was really hoping for an “I fart in your general direction” 😊
Trump has made the presidency a daily SNL opening skit.
The SMARTEST SHOW EVER!!!! Love it!!!! 👏👏👏
“Special relationship!!”, UK 🇬🇧 you hear that! You done be replaced! Jealous?
Fatima Mirza
Jealous? More like relieved, I think.
Tickled pink!
"Trump's just like Rocky except he can't climb stairs and he fights for Russia."
Damn! Good line.
Nothing to do with him not being able to get on the golf course, due to the fall that took him to Walter Reed for his emergency "annual medical" evaluation.
I did not know he fell. Please describe the event in loving detail. Was it 'stairs' that got him? Did he get tangled in shoe tissue?
Collusion is great this time of year 🤣🤣
Fun Fact: "Honest Abe" was his wrestling name.
"Abe is comin out of here with a win, and you are comin out on a wheelchair, just bein' honest with yah"
Hahahaha! OMG, the look on Guiliani's face is priceless.
Nothing says "innocence" like giving multiple explanations for the same supposedly innocent act.
Love it" Denial is not just a river ........."
I think he's maga guilty !
"I may not be much, but I'm all I think about."
~ Jerry Blank, Strangers With Candy
AWESOME! Colbert makes me happy.
Are we sure trump didn't just have a stroke and decided to live tweet through the whole thing?
"The collusion there is lovely this time of the year". :D :D
When you find yourself agreeing with Kim Jong Un 😱😱😱😱
The new best "Nile" joke!
I’m so glad our president is using his time so wisely
I spit my soda at that sudden zoom in 3:40 LOL
Stephen should have included malarkey in his list of n.korean insults
Shakespearean insults......you gotta love them😅😂😄😜
And here I thought the Rocky photo was just a reference to his massive brain damage, and constant coating of oil. Silly me.
*"...except he can't climb steps, & he's fighting **_for_** Russia"* 😄
At this point I'm really hoping the White House doctor is giving him sugar pills instead of his real heart meds...
Another great one Stephen. Loved it
"Greatest of all presidents," folks. Said it himself.
You improve the quality of my existence ❤️
If a clerk at gamestop was caught tweeting this much on his job he'd get fired...
...just sayin'
"We refuse to negotiate with this poltroonish loitersack; this wiffle-waffle fustylugs, who doesn't have the sense of a ninnyhammer, you gilly, wetfoot fribble!" So, you've been talking to Jacob Rees-Mogg, I see...
@san juanita cruz It's a foolish person. While you never hear the full phrase anymore, some older people in the UK still might say 'Oh, you ninny!' or "Oh, what a ninny I've been!" when they perhaps have forgotten something important, mixed things up, or made a mistake in complicated instructions.
Even trolls dont tweet that much
About Rudy Giuliani: Scou-bidou-bidou... like the French song of the 60's.
Stephen you are so funny!!
Lol urbandictionary: Dotard - A cross species between on Orangutan and an Oompa Loompa. 🤣
Omg 😂 thanks
"the time when we cannot but call him a 'dotard' again may come" lmao
Me: Barely texts 3x a day
45: Tweets like a tween...
Me: Ok Boomer - NOT ...lol.. jK #OrangeTrashPanda
The phrasing of that North Korean threat to call him "Dotard" again makes me think of the French Knights in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. "Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!"
Aside from the extremely bizarre stuff about rain, I'm not surprised by the recent actions by #DimwitDonald or, if you like #ToddlerTantrumTrump
Autum Breeze #make Russia great again
if i tweeted 105 times when I'm supposed to be working I'd be fired.
Trump and his Twitter account is like R.Kelly with a video camera, they just don't wanna put it down...
Well said sir
And it damns them. But their sickness is in control...
How can you tweet so much when you're spending all you're time flushing the toilet?
If you think Trump isn't insane..
Rudis face however almost got all my coffee all over the place, just a split second glance but too funny.
If you think Trump retweeting an image of his face on Rocky Balboa was bad you should look at Ben Garrison's depictions of Trump those are far worse.
Good old Zyklon Ben; I loved his first lady comparison piece, really showed what he was made of (racism and toadyism)
Ghoulliani - done. I'm using it going forward.
This guy has absolutely has nothing better to or does he?
? You mean his job? Man, you can't please you republicans. Always hollering that Democrats don't work, but mad when they do. Make up your mind, Russia!
@@JBond-zf4dj I think he was referring to Trump.
@@JBond-zf4dj lol a lil quick to the trigger ace
Farken edit, lazy dotard.
Honestly, I can't tell anymore.
Ghoulianni's facial expressions says it all. The guys a kook. Priceless!
*Would bone spurs also prevent sanity from running in Trump's family too?*
🤣😂😅😂🤣🤣 Scooby Doo villain who is scarier without the mask 🤣😂😅
And trump said am not watching the impeachment and he is so much busy BUT he can tweet 100000000 n weekend ffs.
I, Myself and Me... Always the three of him... Trumpitrumpel LOL
Dang millennials and their phones...
That de Nile joke is something I had to research... well done Steve, well done.
Those pronouns were perfect!
"Stable genius"
Thank God for President Trump! God bless the real American people. Trump will not be stopped. Trump 2020
Scooby doo villain that is scary with out the mask🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Called him a dotard! Lmao rofl lol
He is embarrassing the fuck out of the United States 💀
Unfortunately, what is going on is no better than "internal affairs" investigating any police incident regarding the wrong doing of said public service person. That being said, on with the show?
Scooby Doo villain whose scarier without the mask 🤣🤣🤣
I was hoping Gooliani would never come back - bummer.....
Excellent as always. De Nile was bit of a ‘dad’ joke
RE: picture of Giuliani- isn't that the melt-y villain from Raiders of the Lost Ark?
No. That role’s taken by Mick Mulvaney.
Jar-Jar Binks and Donald J Trump -- "ME-sa likie Putin!"
Colbert breaks it down like no one else lol
2:53 - They really poured through the thesaurus for this one. ;)