Celebrity Pastor Fantasy Draft - John Crist

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  • Опубліковано 17 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,2 тис.

  • @andreah.5962
    @andreah.5962 6 років тому +1948

    Favorite line: "The Non Denomination Domination!"
    lol That is a great team name.

    • @kmills2902
      @kmills2902 5 років тому +9

      Andrea H. Say that 10 times fast! Lol!

    • @YTC12345
      @YTC12345 5 років тому +7

      My favorite is "SHOW ME THE TIETH MONEY"

    • @bigooman2396
      @bigooman2396 5 років тому +4

      @@kmills2902 omg I tried it lol nearly bit my tongue😄😄😄😄

    • @JLewis95
      @JLewis95 4 роки тому

      I like 1 and 10%

    • @fabiansmith5160
      @fabiansmith5160 2 роки тому

      😂

  • @7Annamallover7
    @7Annamallover7 6 років тому +2679

    The amount of work that went into this is unimaginable.

    • @thsu8
      @thsu8 6 років тому +20

      You mean printing 24 headshots? I know

    • @Adegail_
      @Adegail_ 6 років тому +80

      Agreed! The script is incredibly witty

    • @Themoment888
      @Themoment888 6 років тому +38

      Plus they have to research the stats

    • @changedname_8970
      @changedname_8970 5 років тому +1

      7Annamallover7 seriously!

    • @aspenallen459
      @aspenallen459 5 років тому +10

      @@Themoment888 which aton of people do every single week for whatever sport fantasy league they play. Lol I think the whole point of this parody is exactly what you said .."the work we put into some activities...think if we put that sort of effort into something that feeds are soul or our families'..hmm maybe that's not what they are saying but it's what im saying. If I put that much effort into improving any part of AspenAllen -my interactions with others, my physical body, my mental capabilities, hand eye coordination even, ya know, improving muscle tone or detoxing my body, patience, family relationships, my relationship with the Holy Spirit or quieting my mind to hear only what I'm supposed to hear for my greater good and what God wants me to hear to help others literally ANY thing I am, or say, or do...well I have to believe it would be a prettier picture.

  • @jordan473
    @jordan473 6 років тому +611

    “He’s about to raise $54 million for his private jet” I’m dead hahahahah

    • @codyantrim8700
      @codyantrim8700 4 роки тому +4

      And also funding and Christian airline and training pilots . Jessie is the real deal. And Kevin Zadai

    • @rdd7919
      @rdd7919 3 роки тому +2

      @carol lady Right! Not a single Christian Pastor on the board lol 😂. Hope that was part of the joke

    • @FeetintheGrass
      @FeetintheGrass Рік тому +1

      @@rdd7919yes, I agree. False teachers only on this one

    • @TurtleMyrtle12
      @TurtleMyrtle12 11 місяців тому +1

      ​@@FeetintheGrass Beth Moore is a false teacher? That's the first time I've heard that.

  • @Sarah-cb6cb
    @Sarah-cb6cb 6 років тому +175

    “When your pastor is on bye week, always start your youth pastor but expect way less production” 😂😂

    • @joshuas1834
      @joshuas1834 3 роки тому +4

      As a former youth minister, that part cracked me up.

    • @smg3250
      @smg3250 3 роки тому +2

      You are a cute potato. Friends? 🙂

  • @BasicallyHomeless
    @BasicallyHomeless 6 років тому +300

    This was LEGENDARY lol

    • @CookingWithLuke1
      @CookingWithLuke1 4 роки тому

      yo homeless how you doing man?

    • @andrewbeall4882
      @andrewbeall4882 4 роки тому +2

      Bro I love your random crap siege videos! Didn’t expect to see you here tho

    • @RicanSamurai
      @RicanSamurai Рік тому

      lol didn't expect to see you here

  • @SimplyJane12
    @SimplyJane12 6 років тому +1669

    "Tim Tebow is not a pastor."
    "....he is to me..." 😆😆😆

    • @bravos1076
      @bravos1076 6 років тому +43

      If Tim Tebow is available then I would choose Sadie Robertson for a pick. She always brings it when she preaches

    • @DWorshipband10
      @DWorshipband10 6 років тому +2

      E.E. 🤣🤣

    • @umbhacanga
      @umbhacanga 6 років тому

      😂

    • @philfreemedia
      @philfreemedia 6 років тому +3

      He is to me! Lol

    • @nochannelmusician769
      @nochannelmusician769 6 років тому +7

      I’d take Phil Robertson haha

  • @ladyzioness
    @ladyzioness 6 років тому +1814

    I like how he's low key exposing them

    • @DoubleAAFamily
      @DoubleAAFamily 6 років тому +95

      Lady Zioness except Francis chan, the only truthful on the bunch but that's why Francis wasn't really that important. People rather hear the prosperity pastors over the true ones.

    • @gmaxion2001
      @gmaxion2001 6 років тому +54

      andr123406 What's wrong with prosperous pastors? God said that the wealth of the wicked is stored up for the righteous. Where in the Bible does it say that Christians have to be poor?

    • @1689solas
      @1689solas 6 років тому +13

      No he's not. He has a video on UA-cam supporting these heretics.

    • @dietsch4633
      @dietsch4633 6 років тому +12

      If you are god’s chosen you should be blessed. But he won’t bless you, if you don’t know what you have in Christ. Poverty is not an opinion. Health is issues is not an option. Enjoy a sad life if you think god wants you to prosper. You can be prosperous and have a hard life. Bet on it. We are fighting a war here.

    • @gmaxion2001
      @gmaxion2001 6 років тому +16

      @@dietsch4633 David Dietsch The Bible says that the wealth of the wicked is stored up for the righteous. Are you calling God a liar? Are you questioning His Word? God made all of this. God owns all of this. He could speak and his words would come to pass on Earth being as it's his will. Or have you forgotten how to pray? "Thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven."
      What about "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they will be filled." You're telling me that God wants those pastors to simply turn people away because they might grow in such a number that their tithes could build a bigger church and pay the Pastor's salary AND God forbid these Pastors get anything other than coach seats and a half-dead hoopty to go minister. If Christians are supposed to suffer in Earth is poverty, why even accept a blessing? If God wanted us poor, He would not have told Christ to tell us about mansions and streets of gold. Philippians 4:19 tells us all that God will supply all our needs according to His riches and glory. Some of Jesus' last words were commandments to go into the world and preach. You can't feed the bread of Christ if your church isn't making bread to grow and be prosperous.

  • @alastairheinrichs
    @alastairheinrichs 6 років тому +972

    This is the niche content I signed up for.

  • @truediva18
    @truediva18 5 років тому +497

    The joke with the black pastors, I laughed so hard. He confused John Gray and TD Jakes. 😂😂😂😂

  • @tylergoldberg1790
    @tylergoldberg1790 2 роки тому +24

    I'm a pastor. I think this will always be one of my favorite bits, no matter what! Everything is spot on!

  • @TheBlessingReport
    @TheBlessingReport 6 років тому +331

    John you are literally a comedy genius and you wit and intelligence is something to marvel at

  • @BibiA1010
    @BibiA1010 6 років тому +1436

    Furtick:Highest applause break per sermon of every white pastor😂😂😂I can't

    • @ma.francheskadeluna9635
      @ma.francheskadeluna9635 6 років тому +7

      Wahahhahahahahah 😂

    • @adambusta1969
      @adambusta1969 6 років тому +24

      U CAN do all things through Christ who gives you strength

    • @tanishahouse
      @tanishahouse 6 років тому +7

      The FACTSSSSSS 😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @biermannar10
      @biermannar10 6 років тому +7

      I was laughing so hard throughout this entire video! Lol.😁

    • @chelyalynniyah1997
      @chelyalynniyah1997 6 років тому +13

      He always comes to the season in great shape! HALLELUJER!!

  • @brettdavis5555
    @brettdavis5555 6 років тому +799

    Half the comments say the video is funny.
    Half the comments talk about the apostasy of the church.
    Maybe that was the point.

    • @MultiProudMother
      @MultiProudMother 6 років тому +24

      Indeed
      Open our eyes Lord

    • @lalaloopsie7986
      @lalaloopsie7986 6 років тому +21

      Yeah but he included two who are not apostates. Chan and Keller are not like the others. We might not agree with every detail but they are not false teachers.

    • @kristaharmon7584
      @kristaharmon7584 6 років тому +10

      Andy Stanley is not a false teacher either. :)

    • @brettdavis5555
      @brettdavis5555 6 років тому +1

      lucy Nunnery I’m not familiar with all of them up there, but Chan has said publicly on two separate occasions that he loves Mike Bickle, even after admitting to being warned of him.

    • @lalaloopsie7986
      @lalaloopsie7986 6 років тому +16

      @@brettdavis5555 I dont know who Mike Bikle is, but did he say he loves him as a person or as a preacher. I know Chan has admitted to repenting of many things he taught as a pastor and he also admitted to "doing church" in an antibiblical manner. Im not a huge fan or anything. I am just trying to be merciful with a man who has publicly repented of shepherding incorrectly. IDK we are all in a process of sanctification. I am just happy my process is not on youtube lol

  • @hoperainey5024
    @hoperainey5024 6 років тому +53

    As a pastors kid... all of these are absolutely HILARIOUS 😂😂😂😂my dad has been laughing at every video!! These are wonderful 🤗

  • @CheersNE
    @CheersNE 5 років тому +242

    "Pope Francis? He's Catholic do they count?" I have actually heard people say this. Too funny!

    • @aidanmccoy5034
      @aidanmccoy5034 4 роки тому +1

      It’s hilarious but I was so confused😂

    • @Amcsae
      @Amcsae 4 роки тому +20

      Definitely funny as a joke, but it makes me sad that it's such a common opinion.
      Having disagreements over doctrine is one thing, but you can't just decide that an entire group of people aren't Christian- only God can make that call.
      I still laughed though.

    • @jcovers5908
      @jcovers5908 4 роки тому

      HAH

    • @crystalhowley4259
      @crystalhowley4259 4 роки тому +17

      It is funny but really sad since the church can literally date back to the time of Christ. I pray one day we will be united once more as one body!

    • @charliepeck4353
      @charliepeck4353 4 роки тому +15

      If you don’t believe in salvation by faith in Jesus alone then you are not a Christian.

  • @heavymetalmusichead4969
    @heavymetalmusichead4969 6 років тому +264

    "Francis Chan's racial ambiguity." 😂😂😂😂

    • @asinegaasinega
      @asinegaasinega 3 роки тому +3

      Poking fun at the absurdity of what the world espouses in the best way!

  • @AMinnie
    @AMinnie 6 років тому +169

    This is one of the most original sketches I've ever seen on UA-cam. So well thought out. So funny. Soooo accurate. Just great content John. 👌🏾👌🏾

  • @sethwalker8952
    @sethwalker8952 6 років тому +228

    *dramatic pause*
    “SELENA” 😂

    • @davidlee595
      @davidlee595 6 років тому +4

      someone explain this please?

    • @ionsilvan9169
      @ionsilvan9169 6 років тому

      😂😂😂😂

    • @lynnie1333
      @lynnie1333 6 років тому +3

      David Lee they're talking about selena gomez

    • @lynnie1333
      @lynnie1333 6 років тому +8

      bubblelover343 yes, selena gomez attends hillsong

    • @lakin7878
      @lakin7878 6 років тому +4

      @@bubblelover343 that's Selena quintanilla but shes not alive so he wouldn't have her number

  • @MrWatsonComeHere
    @MrWatsonComeHere 6 років тому +88

    “Osteen, theTom Brady of Pastors” lol...

  • @Texas_Heat7
    @Texas_Heat7 6 років тому +44

    “Always converts in the red zone.” Hahaha

  • @ailyme189
    @ailyme189 6 років тому +487

    This is every southern church meeting I’ve been to.

    • @ailyme189
      @ailyme189 6 років тому +6

      squirtle turtal why

    • @EagleZtoTheGrave
      @EagleZtoTheGrave 6 років тому

      @@ailyme189 lol 😂😭😭😭

    • @cat777weasel
      @cat777weasel 6 років тому +3

      @squirtle turtal wtf you on m8? Ya creep.

    • @gmaxion2001
      @gmaxion2001 6 років тому

      So, you've never been to any Southern church meetings then?

    • @gmaxion2001
      @gmaxion2001 6 років тому

      Stephanie Parke Total creep. Probably a stalker too.

  • @raea3588
    @raea3588 6 років тому +468

    People are entitled to their opinion but it really brings a downer to the fun when we get too serious about the material in the comment section. Comedy is about exaggeration. Exaggerating something in our everyday lives and being able to laugh at ourselves. Christians can get far too serious, gloomy and even nasty about things that are important but not THAT important. This is why I love John Crist. Through comedy he brings these issues back down to reality and gives us some of God's joy along with it.

    • @jordan473
      @jordan473 6 років тому +13

      Rachel A. Well said

    • @toqueyessenia6813
      @toqueyessenia6813 5 років тому +8

      Rachel A. you are so wrong!! Do you think this is God's joy? Do you think God feels joy to see His wife (the church) rejecting His Holy Spirit and inviting Satan to their congregations? Do you think is God's joy to see people living in deception like this? I'm going to tell you, Jesus took people's souls very seriously. You don't know God's heart at all. Your comment only shows how you need to meet and know the one true living God. Hope you find it before is too late.

    • @ace-4634
      @ace-4634 5 років тому +6

      Yessy Quiles It’s a comedy. It’s a exaggeration.

    • @esppupsnkits4560
      @esppupsnkits4560 5 років тому +2

      Yessy Quiles where do you see a rejecting of the spirit and inviting satan?

    • @howo357
      @howo357 5 років тому +1

      Ok....

  • @c.t.6314
    @c.t.6314 6 років тому +336

    “Show me the tithe money”
    Oh my gosh 🙈!

    • @eansudholtz6533
      @eansudholtz6533 6 років тому

      Caden Taylor it’s “SHOW ME THE TIES MONEY” like Ties and Offering.

    • @c.t.6314
      @c.t.6314 6 років тому +7

      It’s spelled “Tithe” lol

    • @c.t.6314
      @c.t.6314 6 років тому +2

      Even Joel Osteen would know that haaa!

    • @brettdavis5555
      @brettdavis5555 6 років тому +1

      Too bad it fits with all those multimillionaire pastors up there.

    • @chloejones7993
      @chloejones7993 6 років тому +4

      @@eansudholtz6533 Please be kidding, please be kidding....lol

  • @RadRelics
    @RadRelics 3 роки тому +21

    You could have just named this video "The Wall of Heresy."

  • @RenewalCreations
    @RenewalCreations 5 років тому +391

    Wow, this is sad. That we are so much more a celebrity church culture, rather than glorifying Christ. All his videos are funny but man, do they point out the stuff we need to work on as a Body.

    • @derekhandson351
      @derekhandson351 5 років тому +25

      Amen to that.

    • @waitwhat6882
      @waitwhat6882 4 роки тому +14

      Amen

    • @jekku4688
      @jekku4688 4 роки тому +34

      his entire point, i believe. And he's good at it.

    • @skontheroad
      @skontheroad 3 роки тому +7

      Not that anyone asked my opinion, but I am an Orthodox Jew and still find his stuff hysterically funny (until he gets into his New Testament stuff... then I am lost! 🤷‍♀️) No judgements here! A lot of the pastor stuff is similar to the jokes we would make about the Rabbi, of the kids groups during services, JDate, even his "If Bible characters had iPhones" makes me laugh! People are people--doesn't matter why we are congregating, the outcome is still the same as human behavior is always very similar!

    • @danlevesque5437
      @danlevesque5437 3 роки тому +4

      @@skontheroad I saw your comment about getting lost on the new testament content and I was just curious (since you said you were orthodox I thought maybe you would consider the following thoughts) about all the old testament passages saing things like the LORD not sharing his glory with another, everyone who offered strange fire or simply laid a hand on the ark to steady it from falling, blood sacrifice for sin offerings looking forward to the day when the kingdom of God finally gets set up for real exactly how was Jesus able to claim all he did and then absolutely silence from heaven (except for his baptism from John the Baptist) remember the serpant on the pole in the wilderness looking at it to be healed all pictures and symbols of things written in the new testament shedding of his blood on the cross for the ultimate final payment of sins just something to really consider everyone else always said one day or a day will come or just a servant of the most high delivering a message from the LORD Jesus said "I Am"

  • @JosephTheDreamer
    @JosephTheDreamer 6 років тому +708

    Right on time for the Nike commercial there team 'Take a Knee'

    • @heyitsemgee
      @heyitsemgee 6 років тому +2

      I had the Nike commercial too... 😂

    • @savedfromself
      @savedfromself 6 років тому +6

      I'll take the knee, the Nike commercial AND Beth Moore's twitter. (Yep, fiyah!)

    • @emansuc
      @emansuc 6 років тому +2

      Had to like your comment to make it 667. Lawd have mercy. Lol

  • @doxazo5512
    @doxazo5512 6 років тому +65

    "Blessings to all of ya on your picks, we do the first-shall-be-last system"

  • @nathalierabearijao
    @nathalierabearijao 6 років тому +410

    Do this for celebrity worship leaders... please please please... I am going to lololollllll

  • @timb6558
    @timb6558 6 років тому +21

    As a youth pastor, that last line got me for sure! 😂

  • @dam4274
    @dam4274 5 років тому +42

    My first draft pick would be Charles Stanley. Loads of experience.

  • @Gary828
    @Gary828 6 років тому +305

    how did Benny Hinn end up on the waiver wire? Have you seen how many people he knocks out with his blazer? he could knock out every pastor on the board in under a minute.

    • @IfaKslays
      @IfaKslays 6 років тому

      Lmbo

    • @jesuschild07able
      @jesuschild07able 6 років тому +1

      He came out as fake.

    • @draggabeats
      @draggabeats 6 років тому +3

      Is he on the waiver wire? No one drafted him and dropped him. He’s still a free agent.

    • @Gary828
      @Gary828 6 років тому +2

      i think someone is getting way too technical about the Fantasy Pastor Draft

    • @nighttime5585
      @nighttime5585 6 років тому +2

      Benny Hinn is a fake...

  • @destinycallahan9157
    @destinycallahan9157 6 років тому +525

    “It’s catholic do they count? No they don’t count” 😂😂😂

    • @MarkMcDaniel
      @MarkMcDaniel 6 років тому +7

      Not unless you are taking some Bishop's underaged assaults.

    • @martinluther7052
      @martinluther7052 6 років тому +3

      Nope

    • @BlindWithStars
      @BlindWithStars 6 років тому +6

      The OG celeb pastor

    • @ohifonlyx33
      @ohifonlyx33 6 років тому +14

      Given the lack of sound theology on the board, I'd say why not...

    • @slibertas1996
      @slibertas1996 6 років тому +4

      Nope. They don’t count unless they are charismatic Catholics

  • @WillFamWonderings
    @WillFamWonderings 6 років тому +237

    Should've taken Benny Hinn. He would've knocked out all the other guys with his jacket!! LOL!!

  • @vanfulpen92
    @vanfulpen92 6 років тому +30

    I’d love to hear the mentioned pastors’ takes on this video 😂

  • @shelby2117
    @shelby2117 6 років тому +13

    "You're gonna have like the whole Methodist line-up right there."
    "I'm an ally."
    Yes! Lol

  • @Cinimomo
    @Cinimomo 6 років тому +238

    Joseph Prince's hair LOLOLOL this is absolute genius 😂😂

    • @Gg-ge5jp
      @Gg-ge5jp 5 років тому +2

      @scottbaino I'm sure he doesn't wear a wig.

    • @kellyalves756
      @kellyalves756 5 років тому +1

      Isn’t he that bozo who’s deposition is so popular right now?

    • @kwabenaboat2326
      @kwabenaboat2326 5 років тому

      @@kellyalves756 way to sound like Jesus much

  • @doxazo5512
    @doxazo5512 6 років тому +105

    "Red zone?"
    "Christmas and Easter"

  • @doccreed658
    @doccreed658 6 років тому +966

    Osteen gave up preaching long ago. He's basically a motivational speaker. He won't even say the word 'sin'; doesn't preach the full gospel. I'd pick Tebow over Osteen any day.

    • @EagleZtoTheGrave
      @EagleZtoTheGrave 6 років тому +14

      I've actually heard him say it before, I got to give credit where it's due lol

    • @lakin7878
      @lakin7878 6 років тому +17

      Yea he doesnt consider himself a pastor but a televangilist. I'm thinking maybe of how Christians are depicted now these days that he wouldn't want his title to be pastor

    • @randsollie7921
      @randsollie7921 6 років тому +28

      Is he supposed to preach sin? What verse is that. Maybe that's why all these other churches are so small (and jealous of the big boys) because Jesus said He would remove their candle stick (influence) Rev 2:5
      Maybe we should all pay some attention to what these pastors are saying and line it up with scripture. Preaching SIN is not the Gospel. Grace is the Gospel (Galatians 1:6) and that is what we are told to preach. Not sin.

    • @braedenmedlock4197
      @braedenmedlock4197 6 років тому +144

      Rand Sollie Yeah but the whole point of the gospel is to give us hope DESPITE our sin. If we don’t preach sin then the gospel means nothing

    • @TrevWILL79
      @TrevWILL79 6 років тому +9

      Nothing like his father, Sad :(

  • @levans3447
    @levans3447 Рік тому +2

    You really did that 😂 confused john gray with td jakes! Im dead

  • @waitwhat6882
    @waitwhat6882 4 роки тому +82

    As a Catholic I found this hilarious and I love John Crist

    • @oompaloompadoompa-de-doo3614
      @oompaloompadoompa-de-doo3614 2 роки тому +6

      As a Protestant, I say hello and Christ be with you

    • @alkittie8
      @alkittie8 2 роки тому +6

      I think it's fair to add Fr. Mike Schmitz in here now

    • @repent.sinner
      @repent.sinner Рік тому +2

      Mary cant save you, its also idolatry. Only Jesus, mary cant hear you and the pope cant forgive sins only Jesus can.

    • @crimsonstripes
      @crimsonstripes Рік тому +2

      ​@@repent.sinner It's true, but a lot of them don't put that much weight on Mary, the apostles, and the Pope thankfully. I like Michael Knowles Catholic theology a good bit.

    • @nikigirgus4301
      @nikigirgus4301 Рік тому +1

      @@repent.sinnertell Jesus you hate his mother. We’ll buy the popcorn. 😂

  • @ashleycnossen3157
    @ashleycnossen3157 6 років тому +51

    On rare occasions I wish there was a Love button for awesome UA-cam videos like this

  • @thousandfootdeepend1278
    @thousandfootdeepend1278 6 років тому +77

    "First and 10%" 😂😂

  • @wholesome122
    @wholesome122 6 років тому +105

    I lost it at Pope Francis twitter followers 😂

  • @onlyallegra
    @onlyallegra 2 роки тому +3

    Worst day I have had in six months and the only thing that centers me is watch all of these videos. This kind of humor brings me back to logic. Man I love this guy

  • @isistoldson
    @isistoldson 6 років тому +56

    I love how it’s not REALLY offensive. Like this is quality comedy😂

    • @jjboo4064
      @jjboo4064 3 роки тому

      Walking a tightrope

  • @weekendmom
    @weekendmom 6 років тому +58

    "He's Catholic. Do they count?" LOL

    • @Ryberg2.0
      @Ryberg2.0 6 років тому +5

      The Red Zone... Christmas and Easter.. 😂😂

  • @kermitismyspiritanimal9197
    @kermitismyspiritanimal9197 6 років тому +219

    My face and heart froze when John was choosing T.D. Jake's for John Grey.😱 NOT ALL BLACK PPL LOOK ALIKE!!!! 😆😂 I'm sure he did that on purpose though, it just didn't sink in at the moment LoL Love you John!!!😘

    • @danielroy8232
      @danielroy8232 6 років тому +11

      those guys actually look pretty similar.

    • @GustavusAdolphus2
      @GustavusAdolphus2 6 років тому +3

      @@danielroy8232 shame shame shame...
      Jk

    • @IfaKslays
      @IfaKslays 6 років тому +10

      Ikr! I did the same thing. I know John means no harm though. He's just being silly.

    • @eco6350
      @eco6350 6 років тому +60

      It was definitely part of the joke

    • @Lemons19902010
      @Lemons19902010 6 років тому +8

      That part was hilarious!

  • @Confusedbluebear
    @Confusedbluebear 6 років тому +102

    Oh my goodness 😂 😂 this was brilliant!!!!!! "Show me the tithe money!!" Not the private jet😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @CherylWalters
    @CherylWalters 6 років тому +9

    Just saw John with my family last night here in Houston - absolutely the medicine we needed in these stressful times! I haven't laughed this hard in quite a while. Dustin Nickerson is terrific as well... who probably gave the most memorable take away phrase... "Ponchos to Parkas." Thank you for grounding your innovative humor with thoughtful inspection on today's Christian social norms and "ab-norms"!

  • @JoanSweet
    @JoanSweet 5 років тому +30

    The fact that I knew all these names and have watched their sermons 😂😂. Oh myyyyzzzz. The TD jakes part broke me!

  • @theauntofdragons
    @theauntofdragons 6 років тому +41

    This is the most fun and relatable video ever lol. I understood all the references!! I need to call my mom and thank her

  • @ABElizabeth5
    @ABElizabeth5 6 років тому +913

    Hilarious but also sad

    • @josmeryfrias1349
      @josmeryfrias1349 6 років тому +49

      Sad :/ If we don't reflect Jesus we lose our goal.

    • @Hmfirestormz
      @Hmfirestormz 6 років тому +28

      AB Elizabeth yea... the all those men and woman up there bringing shame to His name

    • @thatonegirlelaine
      @thatonegirlelaine 6 років тому +47

      Hmfirestormz I would seriously disagree with Francis Chan. He is rock solid.

    • @ajservant9907
      @ajservant9907 6 років тому +36

      I believe that Steven furtick is a great pastor God has used him to help me with so much in life.

    • @alantinoalantonio
      @alantinoalantonio 6 років тому +6

      @@thatonegirlelaine agreed. Everbody else are charlatans

  • @emf49
    @emf49 6 років тому +11

    Brilliant satire John. Your humorous skits brighten up my days!

  • @trendylooper3255
    @trendylooper3255 6 років тому +191

    *He’s the Tom Brady of Pastors...I’m dead, but also alive in God*
    *Amen*

  • @psychlops924
    @psychlops924 5 років тому +13

    After reading these comments I have to say: I am so glad I don’t belong to a church where we have to worry about choosing a pastor we like or that we believe in. Having lay ministers chosen by the Spirit to serve the congregation seems like a great way to avoid the pitfalls everyone is complaining about here.

  • @melissakrieger34
    @melissakrieger34 6 років тому +57

    The expressions you make are hysterical. 😂

    • @inputname2727
      @inputname2727 6 років тому +1

      😨😀

    • @darinjuliesims354
      @darinjuliesims354 6 років тому +1

      Especially when he nodded and then nodded again when the guys said "Selina"

  • @jennetterussell5823
    @jennetterussell5823 6 років тому +20

    The Pope's Twitter followers killed me 😂 That's hilarious

  • @marimayn716
    @marimayn716 6 років тому +20

    "Whole Methodist lineup" 😂😂😂😂😂😂. This was epic!!

  • @olusakinmissiondiaries
    @olusakinmissiondiaries 4 роки тому +11

    "I went to online campuses and I couldn't find a single parking space." 😂😂

    • @StasiaAleen
      @StasiaAleen 4 роки тому +3

      He said “all 9 campuses”

    • @ih82r8
      @ih82r8 3 роки тому +1

      @@StasiaAleen They both work actually LOL (but yeah it was all 9)

    • @ameliac504
      @ameliac504 Рік тому

      ROFL

  • @fosterfuchs
    @fosterfuchs 5 років тому +17

    I know there was a mention of private jets. But the PPR formula should have included the size of the compounds they live in.

  • @sanorris08
    @sanorris08 6 років тому +6

    Take a Knee🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. This is so funny! How do you do these videos without cracking up every week! Thanks for the laugh!

  • @blondie4lyfe245
    @blondie4lyfe245 6 років тому +22

    Wow!! John has really blown up in popularity!!🙌🙌🙌I'm proud!!!

  • @EricChamplin
    @EricChamplin 6 років тому +21

    "He's Catholic does that even count!?" hahaha

  • @angelaroberts2882
    @angelaroberts2882 5 років тому +60

    The mix up of John gray and jakes was hella shady 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @VictoriaABaldwin
    @VictoriaABaldwin 5 років тому +132

    i’m actually cringing at how serious people are taking this video and how negative the comments are. the video is a joke lol

    • @jd9039
      @jd9039 5 років тому

      Kinda true, I don't wanna sound legalistic. Cause this can turn into a (negative joke) Who are we to judge (anything)or (anybody). Especially when non Christian have to listen to this now.......it'll deffinatly be confusing.😥

    • @arandomuser9459
      @arandomuser9459 5 років тому +1

      Bible Studies with Victoria
      Exactly. I’m not even religious and I seem to like this guy more than a lot of Christians if the comments are anything to go by.

  • @RH-tv9hk
    @RH-tv9hk 5 років тому +10

    "The number of minutes their sermon goes over" 😆

  • @tewoflostelahun
    @tewoflostelahun 6 років тому +144

    Great to have Tim Keller's theology 🙌🙌

    • @danielsaezv
      @danielsaezv 6 років тому +4

      Best part in the video!

    • @AJS2095
      @AJS2095 6 років тому +2

      @@matthiasbates9660 *cough* Rick Warren..

    • @caseysykes5273
      @caseysykes5273 6 років тому +1

      HE SAID IT. THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN.

    • @LovelyKelly645
      @LovelyKelly645 6 років тому

      @@matthiasbates9660 u don't know where any of their souls are going

    • @danielsaezv
      @danielsaezv 6 років тому

      Matthias Bates And who put you in charge of hell?

  • @radiopoet1330
    @radiopoet1330 6 років тому +36

    This is great! He didn’t cross the line of respect yet this was so funny!

  • @SuperDelightfulone
    @SuperDelightfulone 5 років тому +1

    So never heard of John Christ, but I have been having some bad days and I believe God but this in my feed to help me relax an d to know he has this...thanks for the SMILE

  • @zdp85magic
    @zdp85magic 2 роки тому +2

    “..it wrecked me…” 😂 😂 😂

  • @adambusta1969
    @adambusta1969 6 років тому +189

    Joel osteen "Tom Brady of pastors "

    • @ScrewBallTheAlien
      @ScrewBallTheAlien 6 років тому +29

      Adam Busta I didn’t know Tom Brady was a heretic

    • @lukeedwards2019
      @lukeedwards2019 6 років тому +1

      /ShadowSaber/ so true

    • @c.t.6314
      @c.t.6314 6 років тому +2

      Yeah Joel Osteen wears makeup. He probably best defines a poser.

    • @kena90
      @kena90 6 років тому +11

      That’s an insult to Tom Brady, right?

    • @c.t.6314
      @c.t.6314 6 років тому

      Definitely lol

  • @imabeliever85
    @imabeliever85 6 років тому +6

    This might be John’s masterpiece, one of the best UA-cam videos ever

  • @tchristian04
    @tchristian04 6 років тому +40

    Having an orthodoxy rating would be useful with that bunch

    • @reader86thefirst
      @reader86thefirst 6 років тому +1

      Keller was the only orthodox guy in the bunch. Of course, he was the only one picked for theology.

    • @slibertas1996
      @slibertas1996 6 років тому

      James Almond Chan

    • @reader86thefirst
      @reader86thefirst 6 років тому

      @@slibertas1996 I stand corrected.

    • @reader86thefirst
      @reader86thefirst 6 років тому

      @@slibertas1996 Also, Giglio.

  • @robervin4384
    @robervin4384 6 років тому +1

    Now that's a comedian I can appreciate. Bravo! Smart, extremely witty & well thought out. Hope he does a gig in our neck of the woods.

  • @livelovelaughlearnlead6680
    @livelovelaughlearnlead6680 3 роки тому +1

    I come back to this all the time 😅 to get a good laugh

  • @brookbrennan4224
    @brookbrennan4224 3 роки тому +3

    Loved that Andrew was in this! Recently finished I Said This / You Heard That. Love his humor! And the jokes about his dad in this are great 😂😂

  • @Whitefoxmedia1
    @Whitefoxmedia1 6 років тому +326

    Hahahaha this is so good!:) I didn’t realize John was so famous!:)

    • @GustavusAdolphus2
      @GustavusAdolphus2 6 років тому +1

      Shame, shame, shame,

    • @Whitefoxmedia1
      @Whitefoxmedia1 6 років тому +1

      Michael Williams haha I know right!;)

    • @MiaRioOnline
      @MiaRioOnline 6 років тому +1

      that's not a reason to smile here, brother haha

    • @Whitefoxmedia1
      @Whitefoxmedia1 6 років тому +1

      I'm not sure what you mean? Why shouldn't I smile?

    • @MiaRioOnline
      @MiaRioOnline 6 років тому +1

      I think the video is making fun of these pastors, no?

  • @YoursTrulyChris
    @YoursTrulyChris 6 років тому +141

    The first shall be last anyone?????

    • @audrab6546
      @audrab6546 6 років тому +11

      Yours Truly, Chris YES

    • @rh3973
      @rh3973 6 років тому +6

      @Yours Truly, Chris I thought of you when he said that!

    • @elroetadele9875
      @elroetadele9875 6 років тому +13

      You. Are. EVERYWHERE

    • @hannawelchvideos3715
      @hannawelchvideos3715 6 років тому +7

      Thought of you when he said that. Actually I think of you any time I hear that 😂

    • @dontsubscribe3702
      @dontsubscribe3702 6 років тому +9

      I've seen you on every blimey cow comments section...

  • @heyrob-net
    @heyrob-net 3 роки тому +1

    I recognized everyone on the board but Francis Chan. People in the comments obviously respected him greatly so I watched a few of his UA-cam videos and just finished reading Crazy Love. Amazing. You never know where you're going to find inspiration.

  • @angelpjc
    @angelpjc 3 роки тому +1

    Brilliant!! Kudos

  • @FoxBlockhead
    @FoxBlockhead 6 років тому +52

    On a Bye week start your youth pastor but expect less production 🤣🤣🤣 my side hurts !!!

    • @DalgonaC
      @DalgonaC 6 років тому

      FoxBlockheadlp I didn't get that joke, could you explain?

    • @theonlyessence
      @theonlyessence 6 років тому +7

      @@DalgonaC in fantasy sports, teams/players have a "bye" week meaning they are not scheduled to play at that time. So he's joking saying when the regular pastor is gonna be out, the youth pastor will speak but isn't as popular or well received by the congregation

    • @DalgonaC
      @DalgonaC 6 років тому

      Hahaha, thank you for explaining. I finally get the joke.

  • @samuelstephen2762
    @samuelstephen2762 6 років тому +12

    "Selena?!" Hahaha this was nicely done guys!

    • @brandynnolen921
      @brandynnolen921 6 років тому

      Samuel Stephen Selena Gomez! She and Justin Bieber could do a song with Lecrae! That would be awesome!

  • @BonnieBlue2A
    @BonnieBlue2A 6 років тому +348

    Thank you for using this script to show everything that is wrong with modern Christianity.

    • @emf49
      @emf49 6 років тому +49

      Exactly!! I think some people missed the point of the exercise!!

    • @nikkileeyork
      @nikkileeyork 6 років тому +2

      BonnieBlue2A seriously!

    • @lucianalove9492
      @lucianalove9492 6 років тому +6

      Honestly didn't know most of them & I grew up in a church. The only one I know that I like is Joyce Meyer

    • @Geenster0128
      @Geenster0128 6 років тому +15

      I think it was all done in fun, these people are really on the same team, not competing with each other... this video just highlights some one their sttengths!

    • @JenniferJohnson-fh8fx
      @JenniferJohnson-fh8fx 6 років тому +3

      I think it shows many things that are right!!

  • @thfield2417
    @thfield2417 6 років тому +1

    I’ve watched this maybe 20 times. Can’t get enough!!🤣🤣🤣

  • @DannyFlamez
    @DannyFlamez 2 роки тому +1

    I like sermons from Joseph Prince & Joel Osteen, so I could appreciate the jokes about them the most. Overall, this video was Genius. When it was over I immediately thought, "I hope there's a part 2 to this."

  • @twotime88
    @twotime88 6 років тому +27

    you sick John, this made me wheze from laughter...

  • @fpp144
    @fpp144 6 років тому +13

    "Show me the tithe money!"
    I died 😂

  • @shiffpup2529
    @shiffpup2529 6 років тому +9

    LOL! My fantasy football team from last season was the Colorado Church Plants.

  • @teejay8105
    @teejay8105 5 років тому +2

    Love it! Brilliant and hilarious at the same dang time!

  • @lashaundadiaz7453
    @lashaundadiaz7453 5 років тому +3

    This is genuisly hilarious!!! 😂🤣😂😂

  • @jackjones3657
    @jackjones3657 5 років тому +12

    Hilarious! This is genius comedy that speaks truth without being dogmatic. Great work.

  • @mumvictoria2757
    @mumvictoria2757 6 років тому +4

    Spot on! Completely out of the park for nailing the excesses and what's wrong with the focus of many churches today with your killer sense of humor. The beauty of your bits are that there's laughter and then sadness when the reality sinks in. The condition of the church as a whole today is heartbreaking. In the area that I'm in it's extremely dry spiritually and most of the churches are contaminated in one way or another and not even remotely led by the Holy Spirit

  • @hannamgeorge
    @hannamgeorge 6 років тому +10

    Also please do one for worship pastors!

  • @Comment_Momma
    @Comment_Momma 4 роки тому

    Thank you for this, glad to see my favorites missed this list. God bless!

  • @kandykaye9981
    @kandykaye9981 Рік тому +2

    “The whole Methodist line up” 😂

  • @WrightIdeaswithSusan
    @WrightIdeaswithSusan 6 років тому +6

    So glad to see that Andrew picked his dad. Good boy!!

  • @masterstepz9800
    @masterstepz9800 5 років тому +66

    Francis Chan is the only one I know that preaches the Gospel and the whole truth. I liked the TD Jake's and John Gray joke.

    • @memoriestwins
      @memoriestwins 5 років тому

      MasterStepz9 • yes rest all are idk who !

    • @masterstepz9800
      @masterstepz9800 5 років тому +17

      @@memoriestwins I only know Francis Chan is legit because he preaches the true Gospel. Also, he left his old mega church and started a new church. That is a man you know would give up his wealth for Christ.

    • @memoriestwins
      @memoriestwins 5 років тому +3

      And now he is doing the beyond thing ! Leaving the Pond to fish in Asia. I don’t want him to go but he has to go. Wish I cN go with his family to the mission field

    • @Brucev7
      @Brucev7 5 років тому

      Yoking issues

    • @ThePynkMic
      @ThePynkMic 4 роки тому +2

      Francis Chan?!! 😂😂🤣🤣🤣 awaw poor dear

  • @marvinthemaniac7698
    @marvinthemaniac7698 5 років тому +13

    As a young child, Joyce Meyer used to scare me whenever my parents watched her sermons on TV.

    • @jeffholmes2459
      @jeffholmes2459 5 років тому +3

      Marvin the Maniac you were wise to be scared , JM is a scary bitch !!!

    • @RC-pe9yv
      @RC-pe9yv 5 років тому +2

      She is scary. I’ve heard behind the scenes, she’s even worse, always screaming and yelling at everyone. Benny hinn as well. They both make my skin crawl.

    • @rickyrickalvous2982
      @rickyrickalvous2982 3 роки тому +1

      You have no idea the repressed fear you've awakened

    • @marvinthemaniac7698
      @marvinthemaniac7698 3 роки тому

      @@rickyrickalvous2982 I don't?

  • @dianne6155
    @dianne6155 2 роки тому +1

    disneyland then this are my favorites. followed by … all the others. portland, nashville, valentine’s day, bible peeps with iphones … 😂

  • @Heartwing37
    @Heartwing37 5 років тому

    Excellent point made! What times we live in!