Every Auto Shop has that one guy. He's always late, drunk or high and the boss hates him with a fury of a thousand suns but he can fix anything and everything. Hell, he probably could cold start a rock.
my boss for my seasonal job is kinda like that. We’re pool technicians and he’s never sober, always in a wife beater and understands just abt nothing abt technology, he doesn’t even have a website for his company he only advertises off the side of his trailer. I’ve literally hit a bong of ice going 65 on the freeway then immediately pulled up to a damn mansion to service their pool. By all standards we kinda look like crackheads hitting shit until it works. Don’t let that fool you he’s done this 40 years, He can fix any part he can get replacements for and can whip up a makeshift fix with random items that works just as well for 1/5 the price, and do any project from construction to chemical work.
Diagnostics is just automating that process and digging down to specifics. Most people who know how to code can diagnose the bug. The more familiar they are with the language, the less they need a debugger. If the person who wrote the program encounters the bug, they can sometimes instantly know exactly where the bug is. A quick run through the IDE and the patch is made.
@@taitano12 That's the thing - they don't really run through anything, they just know, somehow. Like mechanic by noise says, what is broken, without even opening mechanism, these wizards of IT industry look at results and instantly say "program is glitched, and this is where code breaks", even if program seemingly works fine and nothing indicates trouble.
@@ceu160193 You would have to run it through an IDE. IFE stands for Integrated Development Environment and includes a coded editor and a compiler, among other things. You will need to edit and recompile the code even if you don't need any debugger or syntax analyzer.
I work in IT. Can confirm, sometimes you just know what the problem is, even if you cannot prove it. Fixed a number of problems where there was little evidence that the part I changed was the faulty part. One of the most challenging things in networking is when some dufus installs a random router on the network instead of a switch.
@@ceu160193 I once had a job where I had to interface a linux base program, running on redhat servers, with a windows client and a vendor specific database. It got to the point where I was able to diagnose pain points just by how the code was behaving. I couldn't fix it, but I could tell the coders what was wrong and every single time, they'd be astonished that I figured that out, without being a coder myself. It really is about seeing all the dots and connecting them at an intuitive level.
@@shadowstalker130666Kinda reminds me of my roommate from highschool, had to teach the guy how to use the washing machine, how to make food, etc. The guy even managed to ruin a saucepan of mine while boiling water for tea, he and his friend put some water to boil on the stove and went to play some games, I came home a few hours later and noticed that the whole apartment looked like there was a very fine mist in the air and the air smelled faintly of smoke and kind of metallic, I went into the kitchen and saw the metal saucepan on the stove faintly glowing red after the water had boiled off like 2 hours earlier and the stove still on the highest temperature setting 😅😂 I don't even want to know what the hell that smoke the whole apartment was full of contained, I'm like 90% certain it was made up of nothing but carcinogens and heavy metals 😅
How the hell? Was it a stove top kettle that she let boil dry? Jesus wept I have to assume you're American @shadoestalker130666 because we Europeans use electric kettles that switch off once they've boiled.
There's a story about a crewman on the USS Indianopolis, in WW2. The guy could mess up simply standing in a corner. No matter where he was assigned, somehow someway with absolutely no fault of his he'd screw up. Finally he was posted ashore. He screamed at them, pleaded to be left on board, as 'I'm your luck! Don't you get it? I'm your luck!" The first voyage the USS Indianopolis did without him was also its last. A strange coincidence, however if true, a very strange, eerie and frightening coincidence!
Yep, sounds like he was the "trouble magnet". Some engines used to have them in the oil system usually just before the oil pump. They would collect any loose iron filings in the oil before they could damage the pump and then, the rest of the engine. Some people are like them, they just naturally collect problems around them. The universe is stranger than we can possibly understand. :|
@@waynecampeau4566 It's some anomalous/SCP stuff, but it's real. Basically, such person somehow manipulates probability of events around them, so undesired things happen to them, instead of other people/nearby environment. But opposite also exists - I am myself can be described as "luck thief" as I somehow can steal luck of other people.
@@waynecampeau4566I'm that guy but for fresh-out-the-factory computer tech. I stand near it and it goes nuts and malfunctions in ways no one seem to be able to fix...until I take about 10 steps away from it. Then it runs just fine. Even had the same problem when building THIS computer. I had problem after problem after problem but eventually worked out all the kinks. I almost never have problems with it, now. But then, I've had it for almost two years at this point and it's not new anymore.
It's funny, I once knew a guy that technology just refused to work well around. Like automatic doors would never open for him for example. His friends used to make fun of him because he used to get in to those buildings by piggybacking off someone else who was either entering or leaving. Automatic lights as well never triggered. It was as if all sensors just didn't pick him up. He was also allergic to water. Yes you read that correctly. The more pure the weather the more he choked on it and broke out in hives. He was the nicest guy though. Always up for a laugh.
That's a 200-year old ship. Most of its parts are corroded thanks to the radiation it experiences, in which it shrinks and hardens. But it takes months to even see a dent, and this dude sees it in a day. Standing around? No, he's watching, and taking note of parts about to fall.
Ever take a car to a shop despite the car running perfectly and explain a problem because of a funny sound? And the mechanic immediately identifying the problem? Especially if you find out later that that car would have eventually exploded or something? I get the point of the story.
I work in a very noisy plant as a machine operator and despite there being dozens of other machines running at the same time as mine i can tell if something's wrong from across the entire plant just from the sound and vibrations in the floor, infact, i can tell who is working and who is slacking off by the intermediate pauses of everyone elses machines. Once you spend enough time working with a machine you can almost feel something about to go wrong on an emotional level like the machine itself is part of your own body. I also yell at them when they don't work like their people and i can somehow intimidate them, it doesn't actually work but it does make me feel better.
I am this human. I MUST know everything I can about mechanics. I teach myself how to fix things. I even diagnose machines by the sounds they make and I notice when 1 of 200 parts starts to make a different sound.
@@xunheilvsnipezx3324 My best story related to fixing equipment was when a high speed sorting machine with a few hundred spinning rollers had a single bearing failure in one of the rollers. it kept spinning but the sound profile changed enough that I left my station to investigate it. once I localized it to one bin I told the operator to shut it down and I tested each roller by hand and found the bad one. thankfully it was a unused bin and the roller was replaced soon enough. I also had to fix a leaking pneumatic system. it was supposed to hold a vacuum when power is cut but it had a slow leak that would equalize it after only a few seconds. I remembered we hired an outside tech to replace the hoses and they had made a mistake connecting a fluid supply line to the vacuum line. They had to totally rebuild the inside of the machine after they flooded it with fluid. I had guessed they also installed the hoses incorrectly. However there was no schematics available for that EXACT version of the machine. just a vaguely similar one with a few less parts. LONG story short I re-ran the vacuum lines so the "closed on power loss" valve was between the air intake and the component that needed the sustained vacuum. The complex part is the system has to go between -5 inches of pressure. and positive 40 inches of water pressure during a purge. and that needed to be recalibrated by hand using three needle valves. Heck in a Factory job I had I heard a small explosion followed by a insane rattle in the next room over. I called my supervisor over and told him the exact spot on what machine had failed based on the sound alone. A half inch bolt was torn off of a large shaker platform and the material it was supporting was free to shake itself and impact nearby parts. I could tell that just by the sound and previously looking at the machine. The supervisor later told me I was absolutely right with what happened and where. Do you happen to know of any companies needing to hire someone like me? I did all those repairs and many more like them without any formal training. I am just really good at solving problems and tired of working for minimum wage.
I suffer the same ailment! A notable story, I was at a red light and noticed a sound from the engine of the car next to me. I Hollered at the girl and told her she better pull over and shut her car down, her engine was about to blow up, she looked at me like a creep and sped off at the green. Two blocks later, there was a loud bang, and smoke started blowing out of her exhaust. I waved as I drove by.
Same. I will ALWAYS get a repair manual for ANY vehicle that own or am in charge of. And I read technical manuals and engineering reports for fun. When Bender opened up a centerfold and got aroused by a schematic circuit diagram, it took me back to my childhood and the Electronics Now centerfolds. I know hackers that jerk off to circuit diagrams and spec sheets. They don't do THAT for me, but I fully understand. 😁
It's not the only sort of useful human either... and yes, I know there will be someone whining about how we are not that special, how there must be other beings out there like us. But I would just shake my head, because I have been in factories here. A lot of them, less now in our modern efficiency culture, have that one guy. The one HR and shift lead both would love to see the end of. The one they keep asking to retire. The one who can fix half the machines in the place. The one who will tell you why x isn't working, and what y did to make it act up. He will wander over, when he gets to it, and the whole thing will get back to work. And then, when a new owner or manager comes in, and sends him home? Way more often than is believable, he will get a phone call asking how to do x, or where the spare for z is. I have seen companies lose half again the ANNUAL cost for keeping Smith, because they had to buy a whole new machine. I have seen them have to pay double and triple for him to come back for a few days, and fix things. And... I have seen companies die because they didn't.
Either the guy is a good mechanic... Or he is that one sane guy wondering why everyone else is ignoring the obvious warning signs. Thus out of fear for his own life he works to keep everything working. Sort of like a sane normal man in a horror movie shouting at everyone to avoid the haunted house, keep garlic around with the guy with fangs and a bat fetish, and keeps a loaded shotgun after hearing that some brat in a Halloween costume and a knife is going around and breaking into homes in your neighborhood to stab people. Which possibility do you think is worse?
Call me Smith 😂 Came across three electric motor failures. All one in a million faults. Even had the client disbelieve me. They flew out a technician from the other end of the country. For him to only say. Never seen that before. Brought up a fault with electric motor synchronisation. Said the pulleys where different by 5mm. Was told I was an idiot. $300000 later on parts and another fitter. Showed him and said, they think I'm crazy. Two new pulleys later the motors are still in the shed 15 years later.
Human curiosity, tenaciousness and problem solving for win! Thanks for finding and narrating this gem of a story! For the Algorithm! For the Author! For the Narrator! In Rememberance of The Beard!
This one I can almost believe. I have met people that can understand problems before I can. I have experts that are amazed I bring in stuff before it’s broken. I have learned to hear cracks, failed bearings, rubbing stuff. It’s often less than half the price to fix before it actually fails.
As a marine engineer with 30 years slinging a spanner this story clicks well with me, thank you for a well presentment story and a chuckle . All the best to you and yours , The Aussie Boomer
For those who are arguing about we humans not being so special, just remember that all the humans in this stories are astronauts (or its equivalent). And in a life or death situation even if don't know how to solve the problem, you would at least try.
The problem is people forget how unique we are, how special out species is. Our muscle density is astounding, as is our bone structure. We are designed from the very root to be endurance based hunters, the ONLY thing on Earth to evolve this way. This is absolutely terrifying. A human can kill literally any animal on the planet simply by chasing it. Don't even have to wound it, just chase it and keep it running and you will kill the damn thing through raw exhaustion. Are many species faster than us? Yup. However they will overheat long before we will. Only the horse can sweat across it's body like we can, but the horse is not even half as efficient at it. This is how we terrorized animals for most of our early history. We chased them till they dropped then killed them. We are omnivores but our metabolism is designed to extract energy far more efficiently from meat (our brains require meat protein to function optimally as well) but we can subsist upon an all plant diet if we need to. For peak health we need both, with more meat on days we will be more active and less meat on days we aren't. Human metabolism is very odd, as we continue to metabolize rather efficiently even while on the move...which most animals CANNOT. They have to rest after eating to allow their body to metabolize it properly. Humanity is the single most terrifying creature on our planet. We are stubborn, adaptive, and crazy. Humans are also so strong our body has several limiters on it so we don't break our own bodies making use of that strength. People lifting cars is rare but not so rare that you can't find a story of it once a year at least. What never gets mentioned is what happens to those people, the pain they endure after that day, how many bones they broke, or the fact their spine compressed to handle the weight and now they are a full inch or more shorter. We have the ability to breath fire for short periods of time and STAY ALIVE doing it to save someone else...then live with short breath the rest of our lives as payment for going past our limits. Other animals don't have this. You don't see a chihuahua ripping hunks out of a german shepherd, yet we HAVE seen humans literally breaking bones in a bear already.
Wasn't there an anecdotal story similar to this (probably won't do it justice, been a while)? An owner brough a specialist to check some mechanism, the guy spent a few hours just walking around and stopping here and there, then took out a small hammer, hit a spot on the mechanism once and that was it. His invoice was for $10K. The finance manager was incensed and demanded a breakdown of the invoice. The breakdown was as follows: - hitting a spot to straighten/fix it - $5 - knowing where and how to hit to fix the issue - $9,995.
A dam in Pennsylvania as I remember the story. One of the big turbines froze up. Wear on one of the ring sets of bearing had flat sides. Basically all the bearings had a bit of grind/flatted area. 1 in a million chance. But the had to shut down for some maintenance and couldn’t get it to spin back up. 1 hammer blow. Let it return to functionality. With replacement parts ordered. Percussion maint At least that was the story I heard. The engineer was on his honeymoon and had to come back because of it. They paid 😅
Its when they close their eyes, lift their chin, lay a hand on the Machine, and tilt their head as if listening to something- That is truly when the Magic happens.
Some humans truly are blessed by the Omnissiah to fix everything they touch. It doesn't really matter what it is, and they don't even really need to know what it is either, often they don't... but they still manage to fix it. It's so weird, and kinda cool to see it in person, or do it one's self.
I suppose there is some truth to this. I fixed a problem on a weed trimmer this year by replacing the old retainer ring holding the bearing if you can call it that by replacing it with a centre plate for a bathtub. I just drilled the hole out enough to slide over the spline, put a couple of washers to fill the space for the head to screw tight and there hasn't been a peep from anyone about it. The original ring was just spinning and making a bigger hole.
Human pattern recognition allows us to see things aliens cannot, and empathy for anything, even machines, allows us to care enough to fix it before it gets bad.
Greetings Mentlegent! For the Rhyhtm that is Algo Every ship needs a *MacGuyver* Human. Sadly, not all Humans qualify. But the ones that do tend to find these jobs.
Yes, blesses be The Duct Tape. Looking someone comment how important is. Remember hearing about story human and duct tape how ship was saved back. Don t remember story, but important thing Duct Tape is awesome.
It depends on the Human, though. The majority of humans would be utterly lost. But there are plenty of Smiths to go around. Epic nerds like me and a very large minority; I'd say around 15% of the world's population. That's 15 people in a room of 100. And most of the other humans have the abilities of pattern recognition, pack bonding with just about anything including inanimate objects and semi-sentient objects like ships, and curiosity and can, therefore, give an actual Engineer quite a bit of help; with diagnostics, if nothing else. "Uuuuh... Should that be doing that??" would often be enough recognize a problem. Then there's the sketchy types. Those ones will be a problem regardless of competency. So, yeah, every ship needs a human, and most will be useful, especially in an emergency. But be sure to get a quality human as soon as possible. Any species that can pack bond with a patch of dirt or call the ocean itself a lover AND fall in love with a ship is a species you want to include in your crew. Smith wasn't just staring at the wall, he was listening to the ship. Letting it tell him what might need fixing. Telling him if anything is changing. Too bad he dropped out of pilot training; he would have made an excellent pilot, captain, and/or engineer.
He's a red neck. Fixing a pipe with duct tape was impressive so your average red neck would be conducting magic when it comes to fixing things. It does not have to work at 100%, it just has to work well enough.
I mean. I ride my bike, I hear a small thingy something somewhere dingy and its wrenching time. And yeap, a lose bolt or something clacketing somewhere. Nothing serious, but when your machine speaks, you listen.
We humans have two capabilities that put us far and beyond other land species. Our pattern recognition capabilities are second to none, and our conclusive leap capabilities. Our ability to make that 1-2-3 connection. That, my xeno friends, is why every ship needs a human.
(I am a people person, not a weirdo extrovert, but because I do people stuff - general headology, advising, problem support, rehab, assessment, etc etc. Thing under bonnet goes brr, I am happy. If it makes smoke or bad noises, I seek a man who collects spanners.)
humans constantly take in billions of inputs, but consciously only process a couple of thousands (if that). But the rest of the inputs are still processed by the subconscious mind. If you experience a "gut feeling", your subconscious is telling you, that it has detected a pattern, that your conscious mind has missed or simply cannot detect, as it is missing some of the inputs that were discarded to the subconscious. Of course your "gut feeling" still needs to be honed. It can't detect patterns, if it has never experienced that pattern before. It is not omniscient. But if you for example drive often and you have a "gut feeling" that that car in front of you will change lines and cut you off, better listen to it... it might save your live.
"2137" ? The lord once by the shore, He was looking for people ready to follow Him; To catch hearts With the truth of God's words O Lord, it is you who have looked upon me, Your lips have spoken my name today. I leave my barge on the shore, I'll start a new fishery with you today...
United States Navy have men like that I don't remember what the technical name is in the Navy but the guys called me everything guy because they can do everything on the boat.Maintenance wise.
hey can anyone tell me what was the story were there is a crew that had a malfunctioning ship and when they got to dock a tech priest entered their ship and waked the ship's reactor with a wrench
Now as good as all of you mechanical savants are, there is an opposite being. That would be me. The anti-mechanic. I can describe in detail how the internal combustion engine works. But if I have to do anything more complex than an oil change there exists a better than average chance I will make it worse.
Every Auto Shop has that one guy. He's always late, drunk or high and the boss hates him with a fury of a thousand suns but he can fix anything and everything. Hell, he probably could cold start a rock.
I knew a woman who could fix your computer over the phone. She would say, "Work, dag nab you!", and your computer would start working properly.
@@snidecommenter7117here comes the magic words!
my boss for my seasonal job is kinda like that. We’re pool technicians and he’s never sober, always in a wife beater and understands just abt nothing abt technology, he doesn’t even have a website for his company he only advertises off the side of his trailer. I’ve literally hit a bong of ice going 65 on the freeway then immediately pulled up to a damn mansion to service their pool. By all standards we kinda look like crackheads hitting shit until it works.
Don’t let that fool you he’s done this 40 years, He can fix any part he can get replacements for and can whip up a makeshift fix with random items that works just as well for 1/5 the price, and do any project from construction to chemical work.
It's most known in IT industry, where someone has unexplainable ability to detect bugs and errors without even running diagnostics.
Diagnostics is just automating that process and digging down to specifics. Most people who know how to code can diagnose the bug. The more familiar they are with the language, the less they need a debugger. If the person who wrote the program encounters the bug, they can sometimes instantly know exactly where the bug is. A quick run through the IDE and the patch is made.
@@taitano12 That's the thing - they don't really run through anything, they just know, somehow. Like mechanic by noise says, what is broken, without even opening mechanism, these wizards of IT industry look at results and instantly say "program is glitched, and this is where code breaks", even if program seemingly works fine and nothing indicates trouble.
@@ceu160193 You would have to run it through an IDE. IFE stands for Integrated Development Environment and includes a coded editor and a compiler, among other things. You will need to edit and recompile the code even if you don't need any debugger or syntax analyzer.
I work in IT. Can confirm, sometimes you just know what the problem is, even if you cannot prove it. Fixed a number of problems where there was little evidence that the part I changed was the faulty part.
One of the most challenging things in networking is when some dufus installs a random router on the network instead of a switch.
@@ceu160193 I once had a job where I had to interface a linux base program, running on redhat servers, with a windows client and a vendor specific database. It got to the point where I was able to diagnose pain points just by how the code was behaving. I couldn't fix it, but I could tell the coders what was wrong and every single time, they'd be astonished that I figured that out, without being a coder myself. It really is about seeing all the dots and connecting them at an intuitive level.
My niece cant make instant ramen. Shes 25, and ive still never forgiven her for ruining a copper tea kettle. She melted it.
Soooooo, she burned water?
@Zuzax yes, yes she did. Lol. Somehow managed to ruin a tea kettle making tea.
@@shadowstalker130666Kinda reminds me of my roommate from highschool, had to teach the guy how to use the washing machine, how to make food, etc.
The guy even managed to ruin a saucepan of mine while boiling water for tea, he and his friend put some water to boil on the stove and went to play some games, I came home a few hours later and noticed that the whole apartment looked like there was a very fine mist in the air and the air smelled faintly of smoke and kind of metallic, I went into the kitchen and saw the metal saucepan on the stove faintly glowing red after the water had boiled off like 2 hours earlier and the stove still on the highest temperature setting 😅😂
I don't even want to know what the hell that smoke the whole apartment was full of contained, I'm like 90% certain it was made up of nothing but carcinogens and heavy metals 😅
Tbh it mostly comes down to forgetting, a timer helps quite a bit.
Also get an electric kettle, at least if you forget it you get cold water.
How the hell? Was it a stove top kettle that she let boil dry?
Jesus wept I have to assume you're American @shadoestalker130666 because we Europeans use electric kettles that switch off once they've boiled.
There's a story about a crewman on the USS Indianopolis, in WW2.
The guy could mess up simply standing in a corner.
No matter where he was assigned, somehow someway with absolutely no fault of his he'd screw up.
Finally he was posted ashore.
He screamed at them, pleaded to be left on board, as 'I'm your luck! Don't you get it? I'm your luck!"
The first voyage the USS Indianopolis did without him was also its last.
A strange coincidence, however if true, a very strange, eerie and frightening coincidence!
Yep, sounds like he was the "trouble magnet". Some engines used to have them in the oil system usually just before the oil pump. They would collect any loose iron filings in the oil before they could damage the pump and then, the rest of the engine. Some people are like them, they just naturally collect problems around them. The universe is stranger than we can possibly understand. :|
@@waynecampeau4566 It's some anomalous/SCP stuff, but it's real.
Basically, such person somehow manipulates probability of events around them, so undesired things happen to them, instead of other people/nearby environment.
But opposite also exists - I am myself can be described as "luck thief" as I somehow can steal luck of other people.
@@waynecampeau4566
Yup.
Oil pan magnet somewhere close to the sump. Sometimes embedded into the drain plug(some people just like the idea).
@@waynecampeau4566I'm that guy but for fresh-out-the-factory computer tech. I stand near it and it goes nuts and malfunctions in ways no one seem to be able to fix...until I take about 10 steps away from it. Then it runs just fine. Even had the same problem when building THIS computer. I had problem after problem after problem but eventually worked out all the kinks. I almost never have problems with it, now. But then, I've had it for almost two years at this point and it's not new anymore.
It's funny, I once knew a guy that technology just refused to work well around. Like automatic doors would never open for him for example.
His friends used to make fun of him because he used to get in to those buildings by piggybacking off someone else who was either entering or leaving.
Automatic lights as well never triggered. It was as if all sensors just didn't pick him up.
He was also allergic to water. Yes you read that correctly. The more pure the weather the more he choked on it and broke out in hives.
He was the nicest guy though. Always up for a laugh.
If a ship relies on my knowledge, intuition and problem-solving, it is doomed.
That's a 200-year old ship. Most of its parts are corroded thanks to the radiation it experiences, in which it shrinks and hardens.
But it takes months to even see a dent, and this dude sees it in a day.
Standing around? No, he's watching, and taking note of parts about to fall.
Ever take a car to a shop despite the car running perfectly and explain a problem because of a funny sound? And the mechanic immediately identifying the problem? Especially if you find out later that that car would have eventually exploded or something?
I get the point of the story.
Answers to your first 2 questions? Yes. And yes.
Of course every ship needs a Human, you never know if you meet any dangerous animal in need of pets.
hahha. love that. pets. hahah
There will be scritches
Boops and belly rubs to
If you have a Human, you've already met a dangerous animal and... he now has pets.
I work in a very noisy plant as a machine operator and despite there being dozens of other machines running at the same time as mine i can tell if something's wrong from across the entire plant just from the sound and vibrations in the floor, infact, i can tell who is working and who is slacking off by the intermediate pauses of everyone elses machines. Once you spend enough time working with a machine you can almost feel something about to go wrong on an emotional level like the machine itself is part of your own body.
I also yell at them when they don't work like their people and i can somehow intimidate them, it doesn't actually work but it does make me feel better.
It's experience. Like the guy who can gap spark plugs by eye. And that is in 1/1000th inches.
I am this human. I MUST know everything I can about mechanics. I teach myself how to fix things. I even diagnose machines by the sounds they make and I notice when 1 of 200 parts starts to make a different sound.
This is the definition of a Crew Chief or Flight Engineer depending on the service. I only say that because you sound alot like me.
I know the feeling. It drives me made from light fixtures, car, truck, and my 3d printer. I can feel hear or smell a problem coming.
@@xunheilvsnipezx3324 My best story related to fixing equipment was when a high speed sorting machine with a few hundred spinning rollers had a single bearing failure in one of the rollers. it kept spinning but the sound profile changed enough that I left my station to investigate it. once I localized it to one bin I told the operator to shut it down and I tested each roller by hand and found the bad one. thankfully it was a unused bin and the roller was replaced soon enough.
I also had to fix a leaking pneumatic system. it was supposed to hold a vacuum when power is cut but it had a slow leak that would equalize it after only a few seconds. I remembered we hired an outside tech to replace the hoses and they had made a mistake connecting a fluid supply line to the vacuum line. They had to totally rebuild the inside of the machine after they flooded it with fluid. I had guessed they also installed the hoses incorrectly. However there was no schematics available for that EXACT version of the machine. just a vaguely similar one with a few less parts. LONG story short I re-ran the vacuum lines so the "closed on power loss" valve was between the air intake and the component that needed the sustained vacuum. The complex part is the system has to go between -5 inches of pressure. and positive 40 inches of water pressure during a purge. and that needed to be recalibrated by hand using three needle valves.
Heck in a Factory job I had I heard a small explosion followed by a insane rattle in the next room over. I called my supervisor over and told him the exact spot on what machine had failed based on the sound alone. A half inch bolt was torn off of a large shaker platform and the material it was supporting was free to shake itself and impact nearby parts. I could tell that just by the sound and previously looking at the machine. The supervisor later told me I was absolutely right with what happened and where.
Do you happen to know of any companies needing to hire someone like me? I did all those repairs and many more like them without any formal training.
I am just really good at solving problems and tired of working for minimum wage.
I suffer the same ailment! A notable story, I was at a red light and noticed a sound from the engine of the car next to me. I Hollered at the girl and told her she better pull over and shut her car down, her engine was about to blow up, she looked at me like a creep and sped off at the green. Two blocks later, there was a loud bang, and smoke started blowing out of her exhaust. I waved as I drove by.
Same. I will ALWAYS get a repair manual for ANY vehicle that own or am in charge of. And I read technical manuals and engineering reports for fun. When Bender opened up a centerfold and got aroused by a schematic circuit diagram, it took me back to my childhood and the Electronics Now centerfolds. I know hackers that jerk off to circuit diagrams and spec sheets. They don't do THAT for me, but I fully understand. 😁
It's not the only sort of useful human either... and yes, I know there will be someone whining about how we are not that special, how there must be other beings out there like us. But I would just shake my head, because I have been in factories here. A lot of them, less now in our modern efficiency culture, have that one guy. The one HR and shift lead both would love to see the end of. The one they keep asking to retire.
The one who can fix half the machines in the place. The one who will tell you why x isn't working, and what y did to make it act up. He will wander over, when he gets to it, and the whole thing will get back to work.
And then, when a new owner or manager comes in, and sends him home? Way more often than is believable, he will get a phone call asking how to do x, or where the spare for z is. I have seen companies lose half again the ANNUAL cost for keeping Smith, because they had to buy a whole new machine. I have seen them have to pay double and triple for him to come back for a few days, and fix things. And... I have seen companies die because they didn't.
Every ship needs a Human JOT on it.
{Jack Of All Trades)
Either the guy is a good mechanic... Or he is that one sane guy wondering why everyone else is ignoring the obvious warning signs.
Thus out of fear for his own life he works to keep everything working.
Sort of like a sane normal man in a horror movie shouting at everyone to avoid the haunted house, keep garlic around with the guy with fangs and a bat fetish, and keeps a loaded shotgun after hearing that some brat in a Halloween costume and a knife is going around and breaking into homes in your neighborhood to stab people.
Which possibility do you think is worse?
Just make sure you get the right human. I've known so that couldn't see a pattern on a checkerboard.
Yea, don't want to get a left human, there are all failed art students.. hehehe😁
@@JRMshadow260a I mean, right humans can be failed art students as well, just look at Hitler.
Call me Smith 😂
Came across three electric motor failures. All one in a million faults. Even had the client disbelieve me. They flew out a technician from the other end of the country. For him to only say. Never seen that before.
Brought up a fault with electric motor synchronisation. Said the pulleys where different by 5mm. Was told I was an idiot. $300000 later on parts and another fitter. Showed him and said, they think I'm crazy. Two new pulleys later the motors are still in the shed 15 years later.
Human curiosity, tenaciousness and problem solving for win! Thanks for finding and narrating this gem of a story! For the Algorithm! For the Author! For the Narrator! In Rememberance of The Beard!
Don't forget pattern recognition. A lot of the time it's even subconscious, but it IS there.
Yep. Helped me replace my camaro's alternator when it went out a few weeks ago.
FOR THE BEARD!!
This one I can almost believe. I have met people that can understand problems before I can. I have experts that are amazed I bring in stuff before it’s broken. I have learned to hear cracks, failed bearings, rubbing stuff. It’s often less than half the price to fix before it actually fails.
As a marine engineer with 30 years slinging a spanner this story clicks well with me, thank you for a well presentment story and a chuckle . All the best to you and yours , The Aussie Boomer
For those who are arguing about we humans not being so special, just remember that all the humans in this stories are astronauts (or its equivalent). And in a life or death situation even if don't know how to solve the problem, you would at least try.
The problem is people forget how unique we are, how special out species is. Our muscle density is astounding, as is our bone structure. We are designed from the very root to be endurance based hunters, the ONLY thing on Earth to evolve this way. This is absolutely terrifying. A human can kill literally any animal on the planet simply by chasing it. Don't even have to wound it, just chase it and keep it running and you will kill the damn thing through raw exhaustion. Are many species faster than us? Yup. However they will overheat long before we will. Only the horse can sweat across it's body like we can, but the horse is not even half as efficient at it. This is how we terrorized animals for most of our early history. We chased them till they dropped then killed them. We are omnivores but our metabolism is designed to extract energy far more efficiently from meat (our brains require meat protein to function optimally as well) but we can subsist upon an all plant diet if we need to. For peak health we need both, with more meat on days we will be more active and less meat on days we aren't. Human metabolism is very odd, as we continue to metabolize rather efficiently even while on the move...which most animals CANNOT. They have to rest after eating to allow their body to metabolize it properly. Humanity is the single most terrifying creature on our planet. We are stubborn, adaptive, and crazy. Humans are also so strong our body has several limiters on it so we don't break our own bodies making use of that strength. People lifting cars is rare but not so rare that you can't find a story of it once a year at least. What never gets mentioned is what happens to those people, the pain they endure after that day, how many bones they broke, or the fact their spine compressed to handle the weight and now they are a full inch or more shorter. We have the ability to breath fire for short periods of time and STAY ALIVE doing it to save someone else...then live with short breath the rest of our lives as payment for going past our limits. Other animals don't have this. You don't see a chihuahua ripping hunks out of a german shepherd, yet we HAVE seen humans literally breaking bones in a bear already.
That is top-tier leadership right there actually listening to your subordinates and trusting them in their judgment.
Wasn't there an anecdotal story similar to this (probably won't do it justice, been a while)?
An owner brough a specialist to check some mechanism, the guy spent a few hours just walking around and stopping here and there, then took out a small hammer, hit a spot on the mechanism once and that was it. His invoice was for $10K.
The finance manager was incensed and demanded a breakdown of the invoice.
The breakdown was as follows:
- hitting a spot to straighten/fix it - $5
- knowing where and how to hit to fix the issue - $9,995.
A dam in Pennsylvania as I remember the story. One of the big turbines froze up. Wear on one of the ring sets of bearing had flat sides. Basically all the bearings had a bit of grind/flatted area. 1 in a million chance. But the had to shut down for some maintenance and couldn’t get it to spin back up. 1 hammer blow. Let it return to functionality. With replacement parts ordered. Percussion maint At least that was the story I heard. The engineer was on his honeymoon and had to come back because of it. They paid 😅
loved this story about the ship's human
thanks for the narration
I was expecting something like that, but this particular take is sooooooooooo much Good and Fun!)
thank you for the story. Here is a like and comment for entertaining me and to help your channel grow and get you the recognition you deserve.
So, maybe a human farmer. He could probably hear the engine noise like you can hear an electric charger
Its when they close their eyes, lift their chin, lay a hand on the Machine, and tilt their head as if listening to something- That is truly when the Magic happens.
That's a fun one! Glad to hear you sounding better.
Loved it, thanks
Great story. For the author! For our narrator! For the algorithm!
Well done, thanks for the video :) "Applause"
Some humans truly are blessed by the Omnissiah to fix everything they touch. It doesn't really matter what it is, and they don't even really need to know what it is either, often they don't... but they still manage to fix it. It's so weird, and kinda cool to see it in person, or do it one's self.
LOL, Can I be that human??? hehehe
Emergency engineer ! Meaning his job was to make sure, there were no emergencies.
Well of course he looked like he did nothing.
He was in those rooms listening to the sounds, not staring at walls.
I suppose there is some truth to this. I fixed a problem on a weed trimmer this year by replacing the old retainer ring holding the bearing if you can call it that by replacing it with a centre plate for a bathtub. I just drilled the hole out enough to slide over the spline, put a couple of washers to fill the space for the head to screw tight and there hasn't been a peep from anyone about it. The original ring was just spinning and making a bigger hole.
pettern reconation, is a very strong part of how the human brain works.
I accidentally set my top 200 fiction podcast feed to Ireland. ASN and A boarder prince are showing up. Congrats!!
Every ship needs a human... and a good supply of their most famous invention, duct tape!
Human pattern recognition allows us to see things aliens cannot, and empathy for anything, even machines, allows us to care enough to fix it before it gets bad.
would be cheaper to just replicator or copy human brains and make them into ship ai. what could go wrong? >= 3
You'd probably just need to use an actual human brain.
it would fly by a bleu giant just to see how hot it gets near the surface and then ask the crew why they are complaining about the heat :D
SkyNet?
Oh, you haven't heard of "Jeff the bartender"
@@Archer74 Isn't that the sentient black hole?
Good story! Thanks!
So the human played the role of the XO.
Every ship needs a human NERD. Get the title right 😂😂
Nah, red neck. They need a red neck. Or maybe a Russian. Either should work. Doubt me? Look up some of their engineering feats (red neck engineer).
Hey, just a quick suggestion, can you move yourself down to shoulder level and lower the text slightly? Can’t wait for more vids!
Likes for the algorithm, Comments for the Visibility Throne!
Greetings Mentlegent!
For the Rhyhtm that is Algo
Every ship needs a *MacGuyver* Human. Sadly, not all Humans qualify. But the ones that do tend to find these jobs.
Duct tape and bubble-gum have kept many of my planes flying.
When I as a Crew Chief in the Air Force.
Seriously.
Yes, blesses be The Duct Tape. Looking someone comment how important is. Remember hearing about story human and duct tape how ship was saved back. Don t remember story, but important thing Duct Tape is awesome.
Thank you for the video.
Every ship needs a human
I burn water. Not melt the pot, pan, or kettle. Literally caught water on fire.
Would love to see a follow up to this story from the author
Thank you for the reading
Ah yes those pattern recognition primates, they are quite crazy I'll have you know.
It depends on the Human, though. The majority of humans would be utterly lost. But there are plenty of Smiths to go around. Epic nerds like me and a very large minority; I'd say around 15% of the world's population. That's 15 people in a room of 100. And most of the other humans have the abilities of pattern recognition, pack bonding with just about anything including inanimate objects and semi-sentient objects like ships, and curiosity and can, therefore, give an actual Engineer quite a bit of help; with diagnostics, if nothing else. "Uuuuh... Should that be doing that??" would often be enough recognize a problem.
Then there's the sketchy types. Those ones will be a problem regardless of competency. So, yeah, every ship needs a human, and most will be useful, especially in an emergency. But be sure to get a quality human as soon as possible.
Any species that can pack bond with a patch of dirt or call the ocean itself a lover AND fall in love with a ship is a species you want to include in your crew. Smith wasn't just staring at the wall, he was listening to the ship. Letting it tell him what might need fixing. Telling him if anything is changing. Too bad he dropped out of pilot training; he would have made an excellent pilot, captain, and/or engineer.
He's a red neck. Fixing a pipe with duct tape was impressive so your average red neck would be conducting magic when it comes to fixing things. It does not have to work at 100%, it just has to work well enough.
I mean. I ride my bike, I hear a small thingy something somewhere dingy and its wrenching time.
And yeap, a lose bolt or something clacketing somewhere. Nothing serious, but when your machine speaks, you listen.
We humans have two capabilities that put us far and beyond other land species. Our pattern recognition capabilities are second to none, and our conclusive leap capabilities. Our ability to make that 1-2-3 connection. That, my xeno friends, is why every ship needs a human.
Something I read once... "Humans are the ultimate in self-programming remotes."
AKA The tinkering lazy engineer is turned into a god.
To any aliens out there, I volunteer to be a human aboard any ship.
Flashbacks of driving to game cons with an Engineer friend, who would bring me to instant dread by saying "Now that's really interesting because...."🙀
(I am a people person, not a weirdo extrovert, but because I do people stuff - general headology, advising, problem support, rehab, assessment, etc etc. Thing under bonnet goes brr, I am happy. If it makes smoke or bad noises, I seek a man who collects spanners.)
humans constantly take in billions of inputs, but consciously only process a couple of thousands (if that). But the rest of the inputs are still processed by the subconscious mind.
If you experience a "gut feeling", your subconscious is telling you, that it has detected a pattern, that your conscious mind has missed or simply cannot detect, as it is missing some of the inputs that were discarded to the subconscious.
Of course your "gut feeling" still needs to be honed. It can't detect patterns, if it has never experienced that pattern before. It is not omniscient. But if you for example drive often and you have a "gut feeling" that that car in front of you will change lines and cut you off, better listen to it... it might save your live.
And here I thought he whacked it with a wrench.
I work security and I am that fuck up. However I can spot a problem a mile away.
AH yes still good to see duct tape is still the best repair tool even in the future xD
Smith sounds like a fellow INTJ
A true "Grease Monkey" :)
"2137" ?
The lord once by the shore,
He was looking for people ready
to follow Him;
To catch hearts
With the truth of God's words
O Lord, it is you who have looked upon me,
Your lips have spoken my name today.
I leave my barge on the shore,
I'll start a new fishery with you today...
Let me guess.. percussive maintenance
For the Algorithm, for the Author(s), for the Holographic Voice!
Someone should explain to them that humans have a wide variance of "quality".
United States Navy have men like that I don't remember what the technical name is in the Navy but the guys called me everything guy because they can do everything on the boat.Maintenance wise.
Stoopid Deathworlders fixing stuff and acting all like “it must be Tuesday”
Did anyone notice he said “mentlegents” instead of “gentlemens” at the beginning?
hey can anyone tell me what was the story were there is a crew that had a malfunctioning ship and when they got to dock a tech priest entered their ship and waked the ship's reactor with a wrench
Now as good as all of you mechanical savants are, there is an opposite being. That would be me. The anti-mechanic. I can describe in detail how the internal combustion engine works. But if I have to do anything more complex than an oil change there exists a better than average chance I will make it worse.
Humans see patetns others don't because of our mix of being both an apex predator and a prey species
Munchousens
neat
What is "mooching"
For the Algorithm11!
My pet rock died :(
Ahh yes pineapple on pizza delicious 😋 let it begin 😊
Only with Ham ... (sometimes Bacon is an acceptable substitute)
Comment
Algorithm
it's so weird seeing you in the videos now. I'm so used to hearing a voice without a body from you. 😅😂
no offense. I just have to get used to it first
8th, 4 June 2023
Umpteenth (same day)
I'm sorry but I just can't watch with you bouncing around. Do you have a pod cast with each individual story or is it only the large compilations?
There should be one of spotify , but it had not been updated in a couple months. Its called ASN Humans Are Space Orcs , HFY and other stories
For the Algorithm the story and the voice