It changed me forever. I am a hermit now. I used to be a social, people pleaser. Now, I am discerning, and if energy is not reciprocal, I have no interest. Stay strong tribe!❣️
It's been just over two months since he abandoned me, destroyed my heart, slammed me to my very core. No one came to my rescue. No one understands what a covert narcissist does behind closed doors. I know my God sees all, he knows the truth and he will have to answer for his evil deeds one day soon and my healing will be to give my all to follow my faith and walk in love.
Thank you and the same to you that was very kind of you. Keep on surviving and don't forget our lord listens and knows our pain, give it all to him. 🙏🏻
Once trapped by a narcissist , they control your emotions , your time and all of your decisions . They make you their toy and tool to use whenever they want. We are not fools . We are people who have big hearts and faith in others and have no reason to distrust people we know . We would make lousy soldiers because we care more about others than ourselves .
I have to say there are soldiers with very big hearts. They sacrifice their lives for others. Empaths are soldiers in a war like no other, I think. Be brave. God speed.
There's a sense of relief once we fully let go of people who are possessed by dark energy. It can be difficult to reach that point, but it is essential for our well being to get there. Thank you for all the empowering work you provide us, Andrew, always appreciated.
@peterhensler7930, Yes. Or they put on a good show of charm or love, doing the love-bombing stage, stroking your ego. They move into sex fast to entice you that way too.
Not one person came to my help. People have no clue what this is. You have to do it yourself through God. Thank brother you are a wealth of knowledge. You are helping people!
Most people do not understand unless they have been through it. Once you are out, your clarity returns and you see how destructive narcissists have been.
Tonight I went Christmas shopping with my daughters. We had such a blast laughing and being goofy. I forgot about the narcissist for most of the day…very little ruminating. It was such a relief to not think about him. I dreaded the ride home by myself fearing the slap-in-the-face return of the constant rumination. I concentrated on how grateful I am for my children and the fact that I could feel like myself again. Today was a good day. I pray everyday that he will fade from my mind. God help us all. It’s such a long road to recovery ❤
That is great that you got to be goofy and laugh. I found last summer that when I could laugh again, the ruminations disappeared. Best wishes on your healing path.
Look like we did the same thing today I had to get out the house to go take my new grandbaby to take Santa Claus picture at the mall today I been feeling down send Thursday my kids daddy actually calling me to tell me he finally seen my ex-husband and his new supply after I told if he every seen th please do not confirm he actually have a new supply I already know because the brother told me in May telling what was going on I'm tired of these flying monkey tell me he good and smiling I had been crying the last two days still traumize over this reminisce over him what we did together 17years in this man life just over there in April then went on my cruise came back and got discarded. I had to get out the house to feel better and I did I had a good time my daughter and her baby daddy and the baby. I trying ro forget him listening to these podcast help me alot that these people don't change but change partner. I pray you keep healing and get back to what we all was happy with life❤
I was actually able to take a nap today, no Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde kicking or shaking me awake and berating me... aaand, the rain clouds rowed away, and the sky is blue and the sun is shining 😊 I am glad you made it too Andrew... because you have made a difference in my healing journey🫶✌️ 😊
Being an empath is a curse when you don't know what narcissism is. Being an empath going through narcissistic chaotic hell & mental, physical and psychological torture and abuse is totally decimating, but being an empath is a blessing because you/we were always kind and selfless. Yet, once we process and survive narcissistic abuse and gain clarity, we become wise and fierce. We start to see all the people who have never had our best interests at heart. It does get easier and lighter. I was destroyed and had nobody for a few years, but I have risen like a phoenix with hard work, daily reminders and discerning decision-making. I can sense a narcissist from 5,000 miles away. They are everywhere. God help any narcissist who dares to come near my third and better version of me. It wouldn't end well for them after what I've been put through. Stand tall and build your fierceness silently. The narcissists will fear you because they will know you know who they are. 🤜💥🤛💯😌
Just now starting to feel better after 20 yr marriage to a covert narcissist,flying monkeys my daughter,my sister ,all his side of family .been solely alone for 3 Christmases now. Lonely life but oh my goodness I got a lot of clarity,can’t believe these people existed thanks for your channel
Christmas is a hollow time in the process. This will be my fourth alone but it doesn't really bother me. The relief of not needing the opinionated individuals who favoured the other person is something I'm grateful for too. But there is a bit of a stigma where work colleagues can be curious about my life & asking about my plans for Xmas, which does get a bit tiring. Andrew speaks such sense
I can see why a person would be relieved when Xmas is over. I'll have two weeks off & am looking forward to loads of rest 🦦 I'm lucky I can eat what I like & sticking a leg of lamb in the oven to nibble on through Xmas day is a novelty, whilst having complete peace . TV bores me but I enjoy the radio.. I can go to the gym at different times in the holiday & do long swims without anybody making me feel bad. I've never really enjoyed my birthday but have become immune to any lonely feelings. The first couple of years post beeak up of family life were debilitating/ depressive on a general level but finding a vocational form of work that allows me my evenings & weekends, where I can commute by bike... am now in a place of contentment, which I always thought would be unattainable I've appreciated all the comments here They are meaningful 😇
@marylytle7888 Yes absolutely Yes. When you look at the comments most everyone is very kind, supportive, polite … share the videos. This is how the word gets out there -
He hit me and made me cry on my birthday a few months ago. That was the last straw, I broke up with him. It's been a painful journey but every day I am more and more grateful that he's gone. Andrew you have helped me learn about NPD, I had no idea when I met and fell in love with him. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, I now spend my time looking at each piece of me that made me an attractive supply to him. Reconciling the broken parts, the old wounds, has been tough but necessary. Thank you so much for these videos, they have been a lifesaver for me.
My heart goes out to you for what happened on your birthday. Every birthday, I went through grief & sorrow. They ruin everything that's special for US.
I was actually thinking about this earlier today at work, how certain people really don't matter to me anymore. I can love them from afar, but not really like them much. The few I really trust and have been there and continue to be there, is all that's important. Small circle, happy life! Sending love, light and virtual hugs to you and all! ❤️✨️🤗
I don't understand how one can love but not like. I no longer love most of my toxic family and find it completely alien to imagine that I could love them, close up or afar.
@LyndaHill that's totally understandable. When I speak of love them, I'm speaking from a universal perspective of loving everyone, which is how I view humanity will evolve into. Until then, I can love everyone, but not necessarily like their actions or lack of integrity, thus boundaries must be set to keep them away from my energy. There were times in the past where I found myself spewing nasty things and feeling very low and angry toward toxic individuals. All that did was set me into a spiral of self destruction. And, yes it still rears its ugly head at times. That being said, I make a conscious choice each day whether to hold on to that low state of being, or move forward into the light.
@sherrywayne444 Thanks for your thoughtful reply. I'm definitely not wishing ill on anyone but don't have space in my heart for these people any more. And that includes my grown children. I can barely believe that I'm writing this, although it's been over four years since any communications with any of them. Toxic families are a real trip, even as I'm an extremely loyal person, to be treated the way they treated me means for me that they won't ever have a seat at my table. It really only took one malignant narc to blow the entire thing up. Anyways, thank you and best wishes.
It is difficult when you call these people your family for many years and if one of them was someone you gave birth to. But it must be done if you want to regain your mental and/or physical health. It took me a long time to stop crying and embrace and love myself more than those who were putting me down and hurting me. Thanks, Andrew. You are a great help. Wishing you all the best.
I'm still in the crying phase, feeling like a deer stuck in headlights. I've been here before with leaving narcs in my life.. but this time it's my now ex covert narc mother.. This one is seriously affecting me 💔 I trusted her all my life. 47 years of illusion. 😢
@user-ro3rv4nw2n Beautifully said... it's painful, but the only way to heal your soul, and find peace🕊. I'm praying for all of you, struggling. But always remember, the Good Lord knows your true heart! He can help you... just ask 🤲, and open the door for him. God bless you all 🙏.
@@c.a.5808 you are absolutely right. I am on my path with God, the highest power. it guides me and gives me strength. I am grateful for everything, my life, my peace and my heart. I would not trade with anyone. God bless, sending my love to you.
Thank you for describing when “no one is in your corner “. Wow! That hit home . Blows my mind but I’m stronger for it. Getting stronger everyday . Really appreciate how you give details of abuse /survivorship . I appreciate your work ….. Ann
Ann I know how you feel. It’s been a 18 months and I feel free even if I am not divorced to him. Here on this site you will get support and real caring from people you never met. Stay strong!!!
For the first time, and I'm 61, I am not attending family gatherings for the holidays. I skipped Thanksgiving, had a good time by myself, and I'm looking forward to being on my own for Yule as well. Thank you for the video, Andrew! ❤
I am so sorry Andrew that no one checked if your ok. I know how you felt i was isolated too and it is so lonely and the narc kicks you at your worst moment. Your such kind person with a good pure heart ❤
I absolutely understand the dark night of the soul and wondered if you had also descended into that depth of suffering. It’s a place from which many don’t return, but if you persevere, it leads to profound understanding. Your awareness opens up after the death of your ego. I’m so glad you survived and transcended your suffering.
I look forward to seeing your videos as they are so helpful and giving me the clarity and knowledge to heal from 33 years of abuse. Thank you Andrew and I am so sorry that you were hurt too❤ Namaste
The focus must be on yourselves/ourselves and in our "broken" hearts. NO one checking on you/me/us is not a shock to anyone who has been in a narcissistic relationship. Ii is a fact. The narc does NOT CARE. Blessings! ❤❤
You are so beautiful inside and out. Thank you for this message. Spent some time reflecting today with a woman who stepped into my life post discard and for how aligned the synchronization is of your messages to my own life is I can simply say it must be God at work. Loved this video too. They don’t matter. It’s all let go. And I have peace 😌 I pray this peace for all still in the pain and struggle. Andrew we weren’t alone with you here ❤️🙏
My last narc thought he was insulting me during my sleep, about 18 months after that it became glaringly obvious that my family were the first and most pressing problem, now I am free
You mentioned the phenomenon of the narc bringing up past shame and throwing it in your face. I heard a therapist say that they only want to recognize the version of you that they had the most control over, despite how much time has passed or how much you’ve changed. It’s one reason why, for instance, a narc mom will bring up dumb $hit you did in your teen years. You might be 40 with two kids and a mortgage, but mom treats you like a ‘dumb’ 16 year old. Why? She can’t control the 40 year old you in the way she could with the 16 year old version. I dunno if that tidbit will help anyone else, but hearing that was 🤯 for me. And if you’re young, reading this? It WONT change. Take action now. I’m 53, she’s 81 and the dynamic is the same. We’re LC and she doesn’t want to hear about my job or life, but she’ll bring up me getting bullied in middle school like it was yesterday.
@@barrys7515 you’re welcome😎 Yeah, when I first heard this, I thought about it for probably 3 days straight. I kept thinking about how she’ ll talk to me like I’m a teenager and expect me to respond like one. She’ll bring up old embarrassing stories from years ago and try to push my buttons. When I heard this theory, it all made so much sense.
That makes so much sense that they only want to recognize the version that they could control. That explains why they are stuck in fifty or sixty years ago and childhood. Thanks.
Made my own analogy years ago, before understanding Narcissism. I likened parents raising you in their funky ( sometimes ignorant) ways when you were a sapling. Not being with a depth of understanding of their children being individuals, self-cultivating of their own minds and spirit, those parents continued to use their old, cheap, rusty, worn out gardening tools and will do so to the end. Humans are often creatures of habit. Some are unchangeable. The late musician Joseph Zawinul, who played with Miles Davis, quoted: "The Son sits on the shoulders of the Father ( in your case Mother) and sees farther."
This is time consuming but worthwhile and you are correct - forever changed. Boundaries are not wiggly anymore, it's stressful to be that way, at first. Then, the new you decides that feels good to have respect again. So take your time to get to know yourself again, and your opinion matters. Your voice matters. You can come a long way giving yourself the time, care and attention you freely gave away to the ungrateful. Never again ❤
"Emotional vampires" is quite accurate! I personally think NARCS are Sociopaths. I read an apt description of their mindset which really helped me: "When love is a tool to be used to trap and manipulate someone, sociopaths can love." Unlike this community of REAL love & support, the physical pain (draining) of being abused takes a toll on your psyche. Don't expect an apology or closure. There are none. YOU HAVE to break the cycle yourself. Much love to all of you ❤
What is every bit as freeing as well is that now I know I never mattered to them either. I understand that I have no obligation to them or their flying monkees. Onward with a much lighter sense of direction. 😊 My "spidey sense" is strong and protective too! Andrew and subs on this beautiful channel, God bless and keep you! ❤
Of all the horrors of the relationship, one of the most degrading and soul destroying for me was the public defamation on social media. It was their favorite weapon of choice and the hardest injustice to deal with.
I can only guess how you knew about any Facebook posts. I hope you have gone through it and are done. It is always a good idea to tell friends and family that you do not want to hear anything that he is doing, who he is with, who he is doing what with where and when, or what he is saying about you. You can't control that and it is best to just not be informed about it at all.
Almost 3 years post narc. No contact. I went thru dark night of the soul. Narc soooo doesn't mean anything to me. All the flying Monkees r out of heart mind, and soul. It will take a lot of work!!!!!
Wow three years with no contact. I’m proud of you. Dark night of the soul…. it hurts soooo bad. I know. I’m three months out. I have no contact. I’m just trying to be good to myself. And then I can be good for those around me. I hope your life is going the way you want.
Slowing my life down is what I am doing. It was a rollercoaster summer with a shocking discard and devaluation after that and back in my country no better. People are cold, distant and indifferent. or very meddlesome. Feel that nasty emptiness in my stomach and heart with waves of nausea every day. Feel frustrated and alone. Do breathing exercises, cold training and due to financial difficulties, regular prolonged fasting. Being among people doesn't work well, I feel like I have to recover again and again, I quickly become fragmented and I notice that he is still busy with me. Thank you for your share ,💜🙏
You are doing what’s right for you. Sorry for your pain. I’m in that journey too. Being around people can make it worse. Healing takes time. Pouring energy into yourself is such a loving thing to do. We have to.
Continue to be strong, and one day you will understand how strong you've become. Seek no validation outside of yourself. I had the very welcome experience after 5 years away from the 22 year hell I went through with the narcissist of finally falling in love with myself. Once that happened I understood I needed no love from others.
It is a massively positive thing when they do not matter to you any more. When you finally stop caring what they think or say. The path to healing was to go inwards and discover and understand everything we had been trough and find ways to heal our wounds . Thank you Andrew 😊 God bless you ❤❤❤
I have average or mild empathy (not above average). I reserve it for those that deserve it, never for people that are among the dark triad or tedrad types.
This gentleman has been thoughtful enough to share some very important information in how to navigate in a world filled with narcissistic types. It can be stunning and at times overwhelming to discover just how many people are like this.Over my lifetime I have found that narcissists are fundamentality very weak people who need to control others and make them feel less than in order to maintain power or dominance. Over time these people can and will inflict severe emotional damage that, if left unchecked, can negatively impact one's life. Escaping free from this is like walking from darkness into sunshine.
Mom, sis, bro, n dad, REFUSED to have an adult to adult relationship w me. At 32, I began to put up boundaries, stand up for myself- and literally EVERYTHING EXPLODED. They began actively attempting to ruin my life and even in several occasions placed me in mortal danger. Been no contact nearly 5 years. Biggest bully, dad, has died. I felt RELIEF. Thanks for your important work, Andrew ❤
Yeah your whole world implodes; it is like being in a deep dark hole that gradually (with a ton of emotional work, education, and effort) starts to get filled up. After months or years, one day you realize the hole has been filled and you are back on level ground where you can FINALLY walk away .. FOR GOOD!!! 😊
I def understand the dark night of the soul. 😢 I definitely identify with everything that you say and feel. I’m very proud of you. Thank you for helping others.
I'm still living with a narcissist husband but I don't mind what he say or do. Each has its own bedroom and I wish I could get out. Wishing to be out of the country where they cannot reach me. And be able to send a grandson to college his future is in my hand.Thank you for the clarity.Merry Christmas.
All so true, and the people in my life that are still willing to listen to my struggles just don't understand why i don't just leave. No one can possibly understand the hell you need to go thru to escape a narcissist unless you have been through it.
Keep on listening to andrew, read everything that you can, start making a plan, start setting up boundaries, look up The Grey Rock method to help you get through it. You absolutely must break free, these people can actually make you emotionally ill and even physically ill. I understand how hard it is to do it, but I can also tell you that I did do it, and so did many others, and you can do it too.
One last thing... It is my turn to help other people recover and move on from narc relationships. 5 women have to come to me over the last year of my hard study of narcissim. And now it is my turn to HELP THEM. As so many others helped me survive this last year. This world is give and recieve .. We just have to learn to be decerning and act on it with clear boundaries. There are good people in this world! We must stay open to receive the blessings. That is the one thing i refused to let the demon narcs take from me. Real loving relationships.
I realized today that he don’t matter at all anymore when I didn’t care to respond to his messages or even read it. I have peace and I can get a good nights rest.
The key word punishment is real in physical,mental and spiritual ways. Once we process such actions on our lives and learn it will NEVER change, it is then that the narcissts no longer matter. What matters is one's inner healing. Peace will enter and the world is now light full of hills to climb , glory found on summits. These golden moments alone are worth more than gold and bring peace , a healing balm ❤
I not only made it across the country with two cats and a dog in the car....but I found a way to maneuver a lot of other folks in my life. I am listening to this message from you tonight and just wanted to thank you. I think listening to your videos over the 4.5 day of travel really helped me to do what it is I am doing now, and for that I am grateful.
I’m looking forward to moving to a new city and meeting new folks. At 72 I’m still active in business and gym and who knows there may still be life in my life. Thank you Andrew for giving me a new perspective. I’ve been separated since 4 years and still healing
I have been thru all of what u describe.my health however has prevented me from gaining enough distance from my ex .ge is a stalker,with ties to a cult and drug addicts.ty for all you do .he took a he could ..i wish id never fell for his lies 🙏🙏🙏🙏
Very inspiring video Andrew . We should all realise that we are far better off out of these toxic relationships, even though we crave closure and there are so many unanswered questions. I found that the longer I was out of the relationship, the more clarity I found, and the confusion subsided, and I saw that person for who they really are .
I love the pop of green behind you from the ferns 🙂. It brings out the green in your shirt 🙂. When they don't matter to you anymore is a good place to be. No bitterness. No looking back. You are looking forward. There is peace, freedom, thankfulness, and there is hope. I most definitely agree that the further you are out of the relationship, the more crystal clear things become. Most excellent video🙂. Virtual hug sent to you as well 🤗. Have a good evening🙂. God's blessings to you ☀️☀️☀️
It’s 2:42 cst on 12/9/23. I have listened to all of your videos. They are all perfectly right on. Thank you very much! They have all helped me tremendously!
Hey brother Andrew you look refreshed and well very grateful for your content my non-linear healing path brings me back for reminders and expansion of my thinking thanks for being yourself your authentic self matters thank you
Andrew, to not have anyone come check on you sounds soooo bad. Your inner strength is beyond amazing. Thank you for all you are doing to help us all grow faster than on our own. Greatly greatly appreciated. Keep it going brother. Mahalo
❤😂🎉🎉🎉 Thank you VERY much Andrew, especially for your vulnerable side!!! I learn a lot from you and truly appreciate your transparency. This is thee worst thing I've ever been thru but divorce is almost done. It will be a relief. God bless !!!😊
Yes, yes and yes, all true. Another great video Andrew. It’s good to reflect and remember how far you’ve come, it’s like it all happened to someone else.
Thank you. It been a hard ride forward. Some good days and bad days. But you just have to go on. This narc destroyed me in 20 months. Cant believe i let a person do that. Where i have no self confidence in me. Where i had no trouble before. Was married for 42 years and then widowed and never feeling out of place. Now this narc came into my life. Were i cant fit in. But i have to build myself up again. But sure it been a long ride. Hopfully i will get better.🌺🌺🌺🌺
2+ months away from my narc and I was really struggling today (well really the past week) and almost wanting to unblock + reach out. I’m super thankful for your videos they are so comforting and clarifying - thank you!
Thank you. Ive been DREADING the holidays as soon as they were over last year. If I go, I will be miserable. If I dont go, I will be talked about and accused of being "weird". Im so sick of this life.
Thank you Andrew for sharing your experience, strength, and hope. Thank you for being a ray of light in the midst of dealing with the darkness of narcissism. It is a glorious day when one is total free. They don’t matter. Be Free from the control, the manipulation, drama, chaos, abuse, etc. I pray that everyone who ever suffered from a narcissist will heal, grow, and thrive into a wonderful life.🌺💪🦋🦅🕊️✝️
You taught me so much! I love you and this community so much! This will be my 2nd Christmas away from her. She sabotaged last year's Christmas. By then I had gone through the process, stuck to my boundaries nipped it in the bud and told her in no uncertain terms to leave me alone! I turned to your channel and I knew I would gain wisdom from this community, always reminding me who I am now, having risen from the ashes where the dark Knight of my soul left me for dead! I almost said, you have no idea how much you and this community means to me, but YOU DO, that's why we can tell others, you are not alone. I love you all! I
@@emilywilson7308 I am doing so much better than I was the last time we spoke! Apparently, you are too! You are still an encouraging soul. I like that word, it contains the word courage and that's what it took for us to put the raging behind us. Much love and light.
Sometimes its been so long without the flying monkeys left in the wake of my total disregarded ex, that I ll say Im an only child. When people I see out ask about my siblings I have to think if I really have any . Its so much better this way.
My question is why did I fall so hard and take it? That is disturbing to me. Never again will someone treat me like this and me, take it. It’s more about me than her. I believed in something beautiful. She didn’t feel my idea of beautiful was the same. At least for a while I thought something was amazing. It was sooooo good. And now it’s soooo sad. I’m glad I had something that felt real for a little while. Maybe someday I’ll feel that again. If not, that’s okay too. At least I felt something amazing. And then I felt so awful and painful. It’s so confusing. I just want to give my best no matter what. I’m happy to learn and grow. My heart goes out to all of us who feel the deepest pain ever. Maybe great joy is ahead. At the very least, no more pain.
Thank you for your videos. It's great hearing someone who knows what these socalled people are. It's mind-blowing realizing they are what they are. I'm glad they stay away from me. I don't want them back. I see now they never were my friends. Waiting for them to change is a total waste. The time to leave them was yesterday. I also had some years to process and my plan is to relocate to a different town. Somewhere people don't know two X siblings and people don't think I'm like them. I retired from working in New York and when I returned to my hometown, this was what I experienced. Well, that was them. Not now.
Oh and thank you mentioning unplugging .. I thought for a moment you would mention unplugging from technology .. but I appreciate you describing what you meant and how you unplug.. i hope to be able to do this regularly and eventually too.. I sometimes reflect .. I can’t meditate due to noise disruptions here.. but lately when i go outside I haven’t really been listening to music .. sometimes I watch a video of yours if I suspect I won’t have “me-time” afterwards .. but lately I just have my ear phones in, but I just listen to nothing .. just the wind blowing .. thanks again ❤🌷🍀
💞FREEDOM, I have achieved complete “Emotional Detachment” from my family of origin, the many toxic people I have encountered throughout my life, the narc, and the environment. I am living my life without needing validation from those who have not experienced the challenges that make me unique, and I only answer to a Divine Creator of all we see and do not. It is not for me to give or ask for forgiveness for anything from anyone or to pretend to understand their motives for whatever actions perpetrated in my favor or against me. The spiritual path that is in front of me is designed for my growth and refinement into the person that has no other goal than to be authentic and has no preconceived destination in mind. It is not that they do not matter, it is that it needs to matter to them. Blessings!❤
It’s important to know when to share your light!! Great video! Another point that resonates with me is it takes work to heal from narcissistic abuse! It’s shocking how many people have been abused when they were children!! The reality of narcissism really requires the legal system to pair bond with empaths in some capacity! Mental evaluation should be a process in divorce cases!
Now that I too have understood that I was in a narcissistic relationship and backed out of it after 23 years of marriage...and above all have understood the traits of a narcissist...I can completely understand why Andrew was picked out by one. I mean the smile at the end of all his videos really says it all. And it's such a good analysis saying that we are 3 persons....before...during...and after.....the relationship. Who knows who I could have become in those 23 years without the "during" part!
I'm in a narc relationship and feel so trapped because he is a public treasures and a private nightmare. He was on hospice and I'm an unpaid servant. I still smile when I'm informed how great a person he is. How many women still appreciate the knowledge you have provided. Thank you
It is not a question of wanting to become. Is a question of "knowing" if you are. If you are, accepted and assign the responsibility where it belongs. Blessings❤❤
the most important is to regonize that there a these "takers" in our life. It took me so so many years. My empathy, my naivety ( believing every person is a good person only misunderstood and i came into their life to help. ... that was so extremly painful and i didn't understand why.. Now I am in a beautiful healing process with me - myself - and I. I'm so thankful for this. My life is changing for the better . And I thank you Andrew for sharing your wisdom and your experiences .it helps me so much. Thank you 🙏🏼
Wow, Andrew! You have come a very long way! I remember that video & the impact it had on me! Truly amazing how far you’ve come. I did not even know the word narcissism existed until I watched your first video! Thank You for truly being a life saver for me. So much love & appreciation for you Andrew❤! Keep-em coming still so much more to learn & discover!❤❤❤❤
Andrew ive been on this ride for nearly 2 months and youve been there the whole ride....i know how rock bottem feels...i think u msy have saved my life...its christmas time and ive lost my family....please keep these videos coming
Awesome.
😌😌💜
It changed me forever. I am a hermit now. I used to be a social, people pleaser. Now, I am discerning, and if energy is not reciprocal, I have no interest. Stay strong tribe!❣️
Ditto! 😊❤
@@a.zavala2355 Not an exciting existence but peaceful and safe.❣️
Same
Don't let these narcs keep us down! Get out there and socialize and have fun 🎉
I am attempting. Not as fulfilling as it used to be now that I am wiser,❣️
The moment I realized they don’t matter to me anymore is when I realized I am myself again and don’t need validation from anyone but myself.
I pray I can can get there
💯💯🙏
Amen
lovely
It's been just over two months since he abandoned me, destroyed my heart, slammed me to my very core. No one came to my rescue. No one understands what a covert narcissist does behind closed doors. I know my God sees all, he knows the truth and he will have to answer for his evil deeds one day soon and my healing will be to give my all to follow my faith and walk in love.
To everyone that went through this hell, I wish all the love in the world. Please teach every one about narcisism.Peace!
Thank you and the same to you that was very kind of you. Keep on surviving and don't forget our lord listens and knows our pain, give it all to him. 🙏🏻
One of your best videos thank you 🙏🏻
I share with good people, always love on good folks 1st, narcs don't matter anymore!!😁
When you get to the point of they don't matter anymore you can heal and have peace
Exactly 💯💯💯💯💯💯
Once trapped by a narcissist , they control your emotions , your time and all of your decisions . They make you their toy and tool to use whenever they want.
We are not fools . We are people who have big hearts and faith in others and have no reason to distrust people we know .
We would make lousy soldiers because we care more about others than ourselves .
💯💯😌💪
Horrible indeed!
So we'll stated 👏👏👌
I have to say there are soldiers with very big hearts. They sacrifice their lives for others. Empaths are soldiers in a war like no other, I think. Be brave. God speed.
We care Too much
There's a sense of relief once we fully let go of people who are possessed by dark energy. It can be difficult to reach that point, but it is essential for our well being to get there. Thank you for all the empowering work you provide us, Andrew, always appreciated.
Welcome 💯🙏😌☀️
Well said!!!
True.. you either become devoured by the evil of people or remove yourself, heal, and become empowered
So generally Narcs are good looking people?
@peterhensler7930,
Yes. Or they put on a good show of charm or love, doing the love-bombing stage, stroking your ego. They move into sex fast to entice you that way too.
Can you believe these people are jealous of us? We wouldn't have ever thought!
💯💯💯
Not one person came to my help. People have no clue what this is. You have to do it yourself through God. Thank brother you are a wealth of knowledge. You are helping people!
🙏💯☀️
Most people do not understand unless they have been through it. Once you are out, your clarity returns and you see how destructive narcissists have been.
100 percent true
You are such a die hard narcissist abuse defender! Thanks bro!!!
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
The narcissist slayer lol
He totally is!! 💯
a warrior ⭐
Tonight I went Christmas shopping with my daughters. We had such a blast laughing and being goofy. I forgot about the narcissist for most of the day…very little ruminating. It was such a relief to not think about him. I dreaded the ride home by myself fearing the slap-in-the-face return of the constant rumination. I concentrated on how grateful I am for my children and the fact that I could feel like myself again. Today was a good day. I pray everyday that he will fade from my mind. God help us all. It’s such a long road to recovery ❤
That is great that you got to be goofy and laugh. I found last summer that when I could laugh again, the ruminations disappeared. Best wishes on your healing path.
You will get there my friend. It is a long journey. But you will do it. Take everything to God in prayer. God bless
At some point there will be more good days than bad days.
Keep up with excellent self-care, as that is the key to healing. 💪🏻🌈🦄
Look like we did the same thing today I had to get out the house to go take my new grandbaby to take Santa Claus picture at the mall today I been feeling down send Thursday my kids daddy actually calling me to tell me he finally seen my ex-husband and his new supply after I told if he every seen th please do not confirm he actually have a new supply I already know because the brother told me in May telling what was going on I'm tired of these flying monkey tell me he good and smiling I had been crying the last two days still traumize over this reminisce over him what we did together 17years in this man life just over there in April then went on my cruise came back and got discarded. I had to get out the house to feel better and I did I had a good time my daughter and her baby daddy and the baby. I trying ro forget him listening to these podcast help me alot that these people don't change but change partner. I pray you keep healing and get back to what we all was happy with life❤
❤🙏
I was actually able to take a nap today, no Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde kicking or shaking me awake and berating me... aaand, the rain clouds rowed away, and the sky is blue and the sun is shining 😊 I am glad you made it too Andrew... because you have made a difference in my healing journey🫶✌️ 😊
☀️😊❤️
You have brought me to tears of happiness!!!
They will only have this abusive dualistic approach behaviour until they get you where they want you to be.
@georgea1706 Yeah, and in this particular case, he wanted me dead. God provided me with a way to escape...praise God 🙏
@@ERElena8856 😊
Being an empath is a curse when you don't know what narcissism is. Being an empath going through narcissistic chaotic hell & mental, physical and psychological torture and abuse is totally decimating, but being an empath is a blessing because you/we were always kind and selfless. Yet, once we process and survive narcissistic abuse and gain clarity, we become wise and fierce. We start to see all the people who have never had our best interests at heart. It does get easier and lighter. I was destroyed and had nobody for a few years, but I have risen like a phoenix with hard work, daily reminders and discerning decision-making. I can sense a narcissist from 5,000 miles away. They are everywhere. God help any narcissist who dares to come near my third and better version of me. It wouldn't end well for them after what I've been put through. Stand tall and build your fierceness silently. The narcissists will fear you because they will know you know who they are. 🤜💥🤛💯😌
I don’t care about the Narcissist and I have Never been so happy in my life!!
It is better to be alone than to be unsure
Great thought!
Absolutely!!
Just now starting to feel better after 20 yr marriage to a covert narcissist,flying monkeys my daughter,my sister ,all his side of family .been solely alone for 3 Christmases now. Lonely life but oh my goodness I got a lot of clarity,can’t believe these people existed thanks for your channel
Christmas is a hollow time in the process. This will be my fourth alone but it doesn't really bother me. The relief of not needing the opinionated individuals who favoured the other person is something I'm grateful for too.
But there is a bit of a stigma where work colleagues can be curious about my life & asking about my plans for Xmas, which does get a bit tiring.
Andrew speaks such sense
Same here. I always rejoice when Christmas is over - it's a great relief. That and my birthday are the loneliest times.
Thats really powerful to read! Thanks for sharing.
I can see why a person would be relieved when Xmas is over. I'll have two weeks off & am looking forward to loads of rest 🦦 I'm lucky I can eat what I like & sticking a leg of lamb in the oven to nibble on through Xmas day is a novelty, whilst having complete peace . TV bores me but I enjoy the radio.. I can go to the gym at different times in the holiday & do long swims without anybody making me feel bad.
I've never really enjoyed my birthday but have become immune to any lonely feelings. The first couple of years post beeak up of family life were debilitating/ depressive on a general level but finding a vocational form of work that allows me my evenings & weekends, where I can commute by bike... am now in a place of contentment, which I always thought would be unattainable
I've appreciated all the comments here They are meaningful 😇
@@Martin-rh7mf God bless you, Martin!🌹
Andrew is saving lives every day!!! Help him by sharing these videos on your social networks!!!
@marylytle7888 Yes absolutely Yes. When you look at the comments most everyone is very kind, supportive, polite … share the videos. This is how the word gets out there -
He hit me and made me cry on my birthday a few months ago. That was the last straw, I broke up with him. It's been a painful journey but every day I am more and more grateful that he's gone. Andrew you have helped me learn about NPD, I had no idea when I met and fell in love with him. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, I now spend my time looking at each piece of me that made me an attractive supply to him. Reconciling the broken parts, the old wounds, has been tough but necessary. Thank you so much for these videos, they have been a lifesaver for me.
My heart goes out to you for what happened on your birthday. Every birthday, I went through grief & sorrow. They ruin everything that's special for US.
🤗🙏
@@jesusitrustinyou6900 Thank you for the kind words and the same for you. I wish you, healing, hope and peace.
❤ I'm so glad you are now free. Take care of yourself. And never never never never never go back.🎉❤
I was actually thinking about this earlier today at work, how certain people really don't matter to me anymore. I can love them from afar, but not really like them much. The few I really trust and have been there and continue to be there, is all that's important. Small circle, happy life! Sending love, light and virtual hugs to you and all! ❤️✨️🤗
💯💯😌🙏
Agreed. I love from afar and will pray as led but will not allow shame and other toxicity.
I don't understand how one can love but not like. I no longer love most of my toxic family and find it completely alien to imagine that I could love them, close up or afar.
@LyndaHill that's totally understandable. When I speak of love them, I'm speaking from a universal perspective of loving everyone, which is how I view humanity will evolve into. Until then, I can love everyone, but not necessarily like their actions or lack of integrity, thus boundaries must be set to keep them away from my energy. There were times in the past where I found myself spewing nasty things and feeling very low and angry toward toxic individuals. All that did was set me into a spiral of self destruction. And, yes it still rears its ugly head at times. That being said, I make a conscious choice each day whether to hold on to that low state of being, or move forward into the light.
@sherrywayne444 Thanks for your thoughtful reply. I'm definitely not wishing ill on anyone but don't have space in my heart for these people any more. And that includes my grown children. I can barely believe that I'm writing this, although it's been over four years since any communications with any of them. Toxic families are a real trip, even as I'm an extremely loyal person, to be treated the way they treated me means for me that they won't ever have a seat at my table. It really only took one malignant narc to blow the entire thing up. Anyways, thank you and best wishes.
It is difficult when you call these people your family for many years and if one of them was someone you gave birth to. But it must be done if you want to regain your mental and/or physical health. It took me a long time to stop crying and embrace and love myself more than those who were putting me down and hurting me. Thanks, Andrew. You are a great help. Wishing you all the best.
I'm still in the crying phase, feeling like a deer stuck in headlights.
I've been here before with leaving narcs in my life.. but this time it's my now ex covert narc mother..
This one is seriously affecting me 💔 I trusted her all my life. 47 years of illusion. 😢
@user-ro3rv4nw2n
Beautifully said... it's painful, but the only way to heal your soul, and find peace🕊.
I'm praying for all of you, struggling. But always remember, the Good Lord knows your true heart! He can help you... just ask 🤲, and open the door for him.
God bless you all 🙏.
@@c.a.5808 you are absolutely right. I am on my path with God, the highest power. it guides me and gives me strength. I am grateful for everything, my life, my peace and my heart. I would not trade with anyone. God bless, sending my love to you.
Broken with no glue left,they do not love I loved but he never did
Dealing with other people is one of the hardest things to do in life.
Thank you for describing when “no one is in your corner “. Wow! That hit home . Blows my mind but I’m stronger for it. Getting stronger everyday . Really appreciate how you give details of abuse /survivorship . I appreciate your work ….. Ann
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
I so sad that you had to go through that - I hope you are okay now.
Ann I know how you feel. It’s been a 18 months and I feel free even if I am not divorced to him.
Here on this site you will get support and real caring from people you never met. Stay strong!!!
I am so sorry you felt nobody was in your corner! The community here is in your corner!
When no one is in our corner, we towel ourselves up and come out to box stronger ❤👊🏽
What a great feeling 🙏🏾 I hope anyone struggling get there.9months out
😌🙏🙌
Stay out my friend, l made the mistake to go back. What a mistake that has proven to be….😢
For the first time, and I'm 61, I am not attending family gatherings for the holidays. I skipped Thanksgiving, had a good time by myself, and I'm looking forward to being on my own for Yule as well. Thank you for the video, Andrew! ❤
Good deal🎉. Me too. I’m spending time enjoying my life now and getting better everyday. I’m so grateful to “The Most High. 😊❤
@@user-by4sd2jy2c 👍 and Mothers Day is fast approaching but the narc stepmom gets zero from this girl! 😁
I needed this today! ❤
I still love my 93 year old mom and sister. Just need help to be brutally honest with myself.
Keep my distance.
😌😌🙏
That's the great truth. Be proud of yourself 😊
You love them freely but love yourself the most ❤🌈
Big hug to you 🤗
@@rubyjet9513 thank you 🙏 so much!!!! Hugs 🤗 🥰🥰🥰🙏🙌🙌🙌🌻🌻🌻💕💕💕💕💕😘😘😘
@@rturney6376 🌹❤️
I’m sorry Andrew to hear how it went down. You are a Light for so many!!!
☀️❤️🙏
I get really mad thinking about how Andrew was treated!🤬
I am so sorry Andrew that no one checked if your ok. I know how you felt i was isolated too and it is so lonely and the narc kicks you at your worst moment. Your such kind person with a good pure heart ❤
try turning off your phone for 1 week. see who comes looking for you 😢❤
The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference.
👍💯✔💪🙏
I realized he didn't matter anymore the day he ended the relationship. I had been looking for a safe way out and he provided it that day.
I absolutely understand the dark night of the soul and wondered if you had also descended into that depth of suffering. It’s a place from which many don’t return, but if you persevere, it leads to profound understanding. Your awareness opens up after the death of your ego. I’m so glad you survived and transcended your suffering.
It’s worse than death
I call this the "Black Room."
The new birth for christians
I look forward to seeing your videos as they are so helpful and giving me the clarity and knowledge to heal from 33 years of abuse. Thank you Andrew and I am so sorry that you were hurt too❤ Namaste
Namaste..😌🙏🙌
I don't understand how 5 months could go by and no one checked up on you to see if you were OK! 😢
I know… GØD it breaks my heart!!! 💔💔💔💔
@@jennifernewton4637
Me too!!!
The focus must be on yourselves/ourselves and in our "broken" hearts. NO one checking on you/me/us is not a shock to anyone who has been in a narcissistic relationship. Ii is a fact. The narc does NOT CARE. Blessings! ❤❤
It doesn't surprise me. It is very common for men to have very little to no support.
@@hydrostatic8048not surprising, but still, heartbreaking 😔💔
You are so beautiful inside and out. Thank you for this message. Spent some time reflecting today with a woman who stepped into my life post discard and for how aligned the synchronization is of your messages to my own life is I can simply say it must be God at work. Loved this video too. They don’t matter. It’s all let go. And I have peace 😌
I pray this peace for all still in the pain and struggle. Andrew we weren’t alone with you here ❤️🙏
Thank you for sharing 🙏🙌❤️
So sweet!❤
My last narc thought he was insulting me during my sleep, about 18 months after that it became glaringly obvious that my family were the first and most pressing problem, now I am free
Of both
@@louisemorgan3237 this is wonderful to hear you are FREE- of both toxic situations. 🙏💪❤️
Now
Our mind is a garden
Our thoughts are the seeds,
We can grow flowers, or
We can grow weeds.
😉💯❤️
I love this poem! Did you write it?
You mentioned the phenomenon of the narc bringing up past shame and throwing it in your face. I heard a therapist say that they only want to recognize the version of you that they had the most control over, despite how much time has passed or how much you’ve changed. It’s one reason why, for instance, a narc mom will bring up dumb $hit you did in your teen years. You might be 40 with two kids and a mortgage, but mom treats you like a ‘dumb’ 16 year old. Why? She can’t control the 40 year old you in the way she could with the 16 year old version. I dunno if that tidbit will help anyone else, but hearing that was 🤯 for me. And if you’re young, reading this? It WONT change. Take action now. I’m 53, she’s 81 and the dynamic is the same. We’re LC and she doesn’t want to hear about my job or life, but she’ll bring up me getting bullied in middle school like it was yesterday.
@@barrys7515 you’re welcome😎 Yeah, when I first heard this, I thought about it for probably 3 days straight. I kept thinking about how she’ ll talk to me like I’m a teenager and expect me to respond like one. She’ll bring up old embarrassing stories from years ago and try to push my buttons. When I heard this theory, it all made so much sense.
That makes so much sense that they only want to recognize the version that they could control. That explains why they are stuck in fifty or sixty years ago and childhood. Thanks.
Made my own analogy years ago, before understanding Narcissism. I likened parents raising you in their funky ( sometimes ignorant) ways when you were a sapling. Not being with a depth of understanding of their children being individuals, self-cultivating of their own minds and spirit, those parents continued to use their old, cheap, rusty, worn out gardening tools and will do so to the end. Humans are often creatures of habit. Some are unchangeable.
The late musician Joseph Zawinul, who played with Miles Davis, quoted: "The Son sits on the
shoulders of the Father ( in your case Mother) and sees farther."
This is time consuming but worthwhile and you are correct - forever changed. Boundaries are not wiggly anymore, it's stressful to be that way, at first. Then, the new you decides that feels good to have respect again. So take your time to get to know yourself again, and your opinion matters. Your voice matters. You can come a long way giving yourself the time, care and attention you freely gave away to the ungrateful. Never again ❤
"Emotional vampires" is quite accurate! I personally think NARCS are Sociopaths. I read an apt description of their mindset which really helped me:
"When love is a tool to be used to trap and manipulate someone, sociopaths can love." Unlike this community of REAL love & support, the physical pain (draining) of being abused takes a toll on your psyche. Don't expect an apology or closure. There are none. YOU HAVE to break the cycle yourself. Much love to all of you ❤
Thank you for this message.
My life has changed for the better. ❤
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
What is every bit as freeing as well is that now I know I never mattered to them either. I understand that I have no obligation to them or their flying monkees. Onward with a much lighter sense of direction. 😊
My "spidey sense" is strong and protective too!
Andrew and subs on this beautiful channel, God bless and keep you! ❤
☀️🙌💯
Thank you, JB!❤
Of all the horrors of the relationship, one of the most degrading and soul destroying for me was the public defamation on social media. It was their favorite weapon of choice and the hardest injustice to deal with.
Wow!😮
I can only guess how you knew about any Facebook posts. I hope you have gone through it and are done. It is always a good idea to tell friends and family that you do not want to hear anything that he is doing, who he is with, who he is doing what with where and when, or what he is saying about you. You can't control that and it is best to just not be informed about it at all.
Almost 3 years post narc. No contact. I went thru dark night of the soul. Narc soooo doesn't mean anything to me. All the flying Monkees r out of heart mind, and soul. It will take a lot of work!!!!!
Wow three years with no contact. I’m proud of you. Dark night of the soul…. it hurts soooo bad. I know. I’m three months out. I have no contact. I’m just trying to be good to myself. And then I can be good for those around me. I hope your life is going the way you want.
Thank you so much for your kindness.
Slowing my life down is what I am doing. It was a rollercoaster summer with a shocking discard and devaluation after that and back in my country no better. People are cold, distant and indifferent. or very meddlesome. Feel that nasty emptiness in my stomach and heart with waves of nausea every day. Feel frustrated and alone. Do breathing exercises, cold training and due to financial difficulties, regular prolonged fasting. Being among people doesn't work well, I feel like I have to recover again and again, I quickly become fragmented and I notice that he is still busy with me. Thank you for your share ,💜🙏
Welcome 😌😌🙏💯
You are doing what’s right for you. Sorry for your pain. I’m in that journey too. Being around people can make it worse. Healing takes time. Pouring energy into yourself is such a loving thing to do. We have to.
God bless you, Jorie, every step of the way on the healing path.❤
Continue to be strong, and one day you will understand how strong you've become. Seek no validation outside of yourself. I had the very welcome experience after 5 years away from the 22 year hell I went through with the narcissist of finally falling in love with myself. Once that happened I understood I needed no love from others.
@@kevinpeasetennisprofession4905thank you, i love you ❤
It is a massively positive thing when they do not matter to you any more. When you finally stop caring what they think or say. The path to healing was to go inwards and discover and understand everything we had been trough and find ways to heal our wounds . Thank you Andrew 😊 God bless you ❤❤❤
Sending love and kindest thoughts,to everyone here,❤️❤️❤️
You too flower!!!
🌈 🎀😘
@@marieeakin8534you too hope you're doing well,⭐❤️✨✨🫂
Thank you, Flower!!!❤💗💕
I have average or mild empathy (not above average). I reserve it for those that deserve it, never for people that are among the dark triad or tedrad types.
💯💯😌
This gentleman has been thoughtful enough to share some very important information in how to navigate in a world filled with narcissistic types. It can be stunning and at times overwhelming to discover just how many people are like this.Over my lifetime I have found that narcissists are fundamentality very weak people who need to control others and make them feel less than in order to maintain power or dominance. Over time these people can and will inflict severe emotional damage that, if left unchecked, can negatively impact one's life. Escaping free from this is like walking from darkness into sunshine.
😌😌🙏
Andrew you are an Angel Thankyou so much
Mom, sis, bro, n dad, REFUSED to have an adult to adult relationship w me. At 32, I began to put up boundaries, stand up for myself- and literally EVERYTHING EXPLODED. They began actively attempting to ruin my life and even in several occasions placed me in mortal danger. Been no contact nearly 5 years. Biggest bully, dad, has died. I felt RELIEF. Thanks for your important work, Andrew ❤
Welcome 🙏😌🙌
Same, I’m seeing a pattern with narcissistic tendencies towards Christians. We seem to be singled out and it mentions this many times in the Bible.
Yeah your whole world implodes; it is like being in a deep dark hole that gradually (with a ton of emotional work, education, and effort) starts to get filled up. After months or years, one day you realize the hole has been filled and you are back on level ground where you can FINALLY walk away .. FOR GOOD!!! 😊
I’m filling my hole with positive energy. Some day I hope it keeps me grounded to a full filled life.
@@kevinpeasetennisprofession4905
Good idea!🎉
I def understand the dark night of the soul. 😢 I definitely identify with everything that you say and feel. I’m very proud of you. Thank you for helping others.
I'm still living with a narcissist husband but I don't mind what he say or do. Each has its own bedroom and I wish I could get out. Wishing to be out of the country where they cannot reach me. And be able to send a grandson to college his future is in my hand.Thank you for the clarity.Merry Christmas.
All so true, and the people in my life that are still willing to listen to my struggles just don't understand why i don't just leave. No one can possibly understand the hell you need to go thru to escape a narcissist unless you have been through it.
Keep on listening to andrew, read everything that you can, start making a plan, start setting up boundaries, look up The Grey Rock method to help you get through it. You absolutely must break free, these people can actually make you emotionally ill and even physically ill. I understand how hard it is to do it, but I can also tell you that I did do it, and so did many others, and you can do it too.
I am back to my original self!!! Feels great..❤😂
That takes time but it's well worth it.
One last thing...
It is my turn to help other people recover and move on from narc relationships.
5 women have to come to me over the last year of my hard study of narcissim. And now it is my turn to HELP THEM.
As so many others helped me survive this last year.
This world is give and recieve ..
We just have to learn to be decerning and act on it with clear boundaries.
There are good people in this world!
We must stay open to receive the blessings.
That is the one thing i refused to let the demon narcs take from me.
Real loving relationships.
I realized today that he don’t matter at all anymore when I didn’t care to respond to his messages or even read it. I have peace and I can get a good nights rest.
Thank You Andrew for helping me climb out of the pit I was thrown into. God bless you.
Snake pit!
The key word punishment is real in physical,mental and spiritual ways. Once we process such actions on our lives and learn it will NEVER change, it is then that the narcissts no longer matter. What matters is one's inner healing. Peace will enter and the world is now light full of hills to climb , glory found on summits. These golden moments alone are worth more than gold and bring peace , a healing balm ❤
Thank you!! I’m so glad I found your videos! ❤
Welcome..😌💜🙏
exactly. Thank you. Huge HUGZ!!
So true, they are the broken ones. I was the scapegoat and I left all of them more than a decade ago. Now I see clearly that I am the healthy one.
I just love that head nod ,,it's (take heed everyone)t.y. Andrew❤️
🤔🤔🤭❤️
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlonethat head nod is deep from your Heart,so genuine soul you are Andrew,,✨✨✨❤️
I not only made it across the country with two cats and a dog in the car....but I found a way to maneuver a lot of other folks in my life. I am listening to this message from you tonight and just wanted to thank you. I think listening to your videos over the 4.5 day of travel really helped me to do what it is I am doing now, and for that I am grateful.
🙌🙏🤗♥️
I’m looking forward to moving to a new city and meeting new folks. At 72 I’m still active in business and gym and who knows there may still be life in my life. Thank you Andrew for giving me a new perspective. I’ve been separated since 4 years and still healing
Welcome 💪☀️💯
I have been thru all of what u describe.my health however has prevented me from gaining enough distance from my ex .ge is a stalker,with ties to a cult and drug addicts.ty for all you do .he took a he could ..i wish id never fell for his lies 🙏🙏🙏🙏
yes I'm finally done and as good as heald I believe it's been a eye opener but there narc abuse channels clarify everything
Very inspiring video Andrew . We should all realise that we are far better off out of these toxic relationships, even though we crave closure and there are so many unanswered questions. I found that the longer I was out of the relationship, the more clarity I found, and the confusion subsided, and I saw that person for who they really are .
I love the pop of green behind you from the ferns 🙂. It brings out the green in your shirt 🙂. When they don't matter to you anymore is a good place to be. No bitterness. No looking back. You are looking forward. There is peace, freedom, thankfulness, and there is hope. I most definitely agree that the further you are out of the relationship, the more crystal clear things become. Most excellent video🙂. Virtual hug sent to you as well 🤗. Have a good evening🙂. God's blessings to you ☀️☀️☀️
It’s 2:42 cst on 12/9/23. I have listened to all of your videos. They are all perfectly right on. Thank you very much! They have all helped me tremendously!
Welcome 🙌🙏❤️
There is a great sense of freedom A relief that it's over They do not live rent free in your head anymore A new beginning
Hey brother Andrew you look refreshed and well very grateful for your content my non-linear healing path brings me back for reminders and expansion of my thinking thanks for being yourself your authentic self matters thank you
Agree
You give such sensible and wise guidance thank you Andrew. SC, York, Uk
Welcome 🙌❤️☀️
Andrew, to not have anyone come check on you sounds soooo bad. Your inner strength is beyond amazing. Thank you for all you are doing to help us all grow faster than on our own. Greatly greatly appreciated. Keep it going brother. Mahalo
❤😂🎉🎉🎉 Thank you VERY much Andrew, especially for your vulnerable side!!! I learn a lot from you and truly appreciate your transparency. This is thee worst thing I've ever been thru but divorce is almost done. It will be a relief. God bless !!!😊
Yes, yes and yes, all true. Another great video Andrew.
It’s good to reflect and remember how far you’ve come, it’s like it all happened to someone else.
I am trying to get out of this relationship I hope after Christmas I will be free it won’t be easy but I no longer care. I just want to be free ❤
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thank you for sharing your experience with your healing, its encouraging that we can heal as well. Boy, these people sure do a number on us.
Strength and compassion for others radiate from you Andrew. This continues to elevate you
Thank you For This Positive Message Andrew
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
I think some people don't check on you because they are also in a dysfunctional relationship and they don't want to think about it.
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Nobody is knocking on my door.❣️
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@@emilywilson7308 not so bad...no abuse.❣️
A wonderful and liberating feeling! Thanks to my therapist and me working on myself. I am in a place I honestly didn’t know existed!!
Thank you. It been a hard ride forward. Some good days and bad days. But you just have to go on. This narc destroyed me in 20 months. Cant believe i let a person do that. Where i have no self confidence in me. Where i had no trouble before. Was married for 42 years and then widowed and never feeling out of place. Now this narc came into my life. Were i cant fit in. But i have to build myself up again. But sure it been a long ride. Hopfully i will get better.🌺🌺🌺🌺
2+ months away from my narc and I was really struggling today (well really the past week) and almost wanting to unblock + reach out. I’m super thankful for your videos they are so comforting and clarifying - thank you!
Thank you. Ive been DREADING the holidays as soon as they were over last year.
If I go, I will be miserable. If I dont go, I will be talked about and accused of being "weird". Im so sick of this life.
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
Thank you Andrew for sharing your experience, strength, and hope. Thank you for being a ray of light in the midst of dealing with the darkness of narcissism.
It is a glorious day when one is total free. They don’t matter. Be Free from the control, the manipulation, drama, chaos, abuse, etc.
I pray that everyone who ever suffered from a narcissist will heal, grow, and thrive into a wonderful life.🌺💪🦋🦅🕊️✝️
You taught me so much!
I love you and this community so much!
This will be my 2nd Christmas away from her. She sabotaged last year's Christmas. By then I had gone through the process, stuck to my boundaries nipped it in the bud and told her in no uncertain terms to leave me alone!
I turned to your channel and I knew I would gain wisdom from this community, always reminding me who I am now, having risen from the ashes where the dark Knight of my soul left me for dead!
I almost said, you have no idea how much you and this community means to me, but YOU DO, that's why we can tell others, you are not alone.
I love you all!
I
That is wonderful, John! We are on the healing path together.💪🏻🌈🦄
@@emilywilson7308 I am doing so much better than I was the last time we spoke!
Apparently, you are too!
You are still an encouraging soul.
I like that word, it contains the word courage and that's what it took for us to put the raging behind us.
Much love and light.
Your story seems like mines...
Sometimes its been so long without the flying monkeys left in the wake of my total disregarded ex, that I ll say Im an only child. When people I see out ask about my siblings I have to think if I really have any . Its so much better this way.
My question is why did I fall so hard and take it? That is disturbing to me. Never again will someone treat me like this and me, take it. It’s more about me than her. I believed in something beautiful. She didn’t feel my idea of beautiful was the same. At least for a while I thought something was amazing. It was sooooo good. And now it’s soooo sad. I’m glad I had something that felt real for a little while. Maybe someday I’ll feel that again. If not, that’s okay too. At least I felt something amazing. And then I felt so awful and painful. It’s so confusing. I just want to give my best no matter what. I’m happy to learn and grow. My heart goes out to all of us who feel the deepest pain ever. Maybe great joy is ahead. At the very least, no more pain.
Thank you.
Thank you for your videos. It's great hearing someone who knows what these socalled people are. It's mind-blowing realizing they are what they are. I'm glad they stay away from me. I don't want them back. I see now they never were my friends. Waiting for them to change is a total waste. The time to leave them was yesterday. I also had some years to process and my plan is to relocate to a different town. Somewhere people don't know two X siblings and people don't think I'm like them. I retired from working in New York and when I returned to my hometown, this was what I experienced. Well, that was them. Not now.
Oh and thank you mentioning unplugging .. I thought for a moment you would mention unplugging from technology .. but I appreciate you describing what you meant and how you unplug.. i hope to be able to do this regularly and eventually too.. I sometimes reflect .. I can’t meditate due to noise disruptions here.. but lately when i go outside I haven’t really been listening to music .. sometimes I watch a video of yours if I suspect I won’t have “me-time” afterwards .. but lately I just have my ear phones in, but I just listen to nothing .. just the wind blowing .. thanks again ❤🌷🍀
💞FREEDOM, I have achieved complete “Emotional Detachment” from my family of origin, the many toxic people I have encountered throughout my life, the narc, and the environment. I am living my life without needing validation from those who have not experienced the challenges that make me unique, and I only answer to a Divine Creator of all we see and do not. It is not for me to give or ask for forgiveness for anything from anyone or to pretend to understand their motives for whatever actions perpetrated in my favor or against me. The spiritual path that is in front of me is designed for my growth and refinement into the person that has no other goal than to be authentic and has no preconceived destination in mind. It is not that they do not matter, it is that it needs to matter to them. Blessings!❤
It’s important to know when to share your light!! Great video! Another point that resonates with me is it takes work to heal from narcissistic abuse! It’s shocking how many people have been abused when they were children!! The reality of narcissism really requires the legal system to pair bond with empaths in some capacity! Mental evaluation should be a process in divorce cases!
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Now that I too have understood that I was in a narcissistic relationship and backed out of it after 23 years of marriage...and above all have understood the traits of a narcissist...I can completely understand why Andrew was picked out by one. I mean the smile at the end of all his videos really says it all. And it's such a good analysis saying that we are 3 persons....before...during...and after.....the relationship. Who knows who I could have become in those 23 years without the "during" part!
Thank you for sharing..🙏💜😌
I'm in a narc relationship and feel so trapped because he is a public treasures and a private nightmare. He was on hospice and I'm an unpaid servant. I still smile when I'm informed how great a person he is. How many women still appreciate the knowledge you have provided. Thank you
yes this amen andrew have a good night 🌟
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I moved out at sixteen things, changed some , I loved it, one thing for sure I don't wanna become bitter
It is not a question of wanting to become. Is a question of "knowing" if you are. If you are, accepted and assign the responsibility where it belongs. Blessings❤❤
the most important is to regonize that there a these "takers" in our life. It took me so so many years. My empathy, my naivety ( believing every person is a good person only misunderstood and i came into their life to help. ... that was so extremly painful and i didn't understand why..
Now I am in a beautiful healing process with me - myself - and I. I'm so thankful for this. My life is changing for the better .
And I thank you Andrew for sharing your wisdom and your experiences .it helps me so much. Thank you 🙏🏼
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Yes, Andrew. Thank You for sharing. My life is healing, and I have found peace 🙏
Wow, Andrew! You have come a very long way! I remember that video & the impact it had on me! Truly amazing how far you’ve come. I did not even know the word narcissism existed until I watched your first video! Thank You for truly being a life saver for me. So much love & appreciation for you Andrew❤! Keep-em coming still so much more to learn & discover!❤❤❤❤
Andrew ive been on this ride for nearly 2 months and youve been there the whole ride....i know how rock bottem feels...i think u msy have saved my life...its christmas time and ive lost my family....please keep these videos coming
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