I'm a composer, visual artist, game developer, and writer, all of which encompass my career. My day job is frying chicken at a deli. Amongst the composers, I'm not the best composer but I may be the best at frying chicken. Amongst the deli workers, I'm not the best at frying chicken but I may be the best composer. Yet in each arena, I have plenty to learn from others.
@ketongu start with something stupidly small and simple. Once you have the hang of it, slowly build up and out bit by bit. I'm still a beginner at coding and this is what I always do when learning a new concept.
Loved these > allow yourself to be yourself > no man is an island > be yourself and people will come along for the ride > even a low IQ person is intelligent in other forms; emotional intelligence, statistical intelligence etc
@@rovertyenrab My theory is that people with a high level of emotional intelligence will have an acceptable IQ, but most folks with a high IQ don't have the same balance in emotional intelligence.
I read "how to talk to anyone" before I went to uni, one of the tips was to just ask questions, people love talking about themselves! And the person will come away with the impression that you were a really interesting person.
@@paulwood4142 Haha this was something I picked up after years of flopping conversations I didn’t wanna be in. Just asking questions about some of the missing pieces in a story goes a long way, and like you said, makes you look way more attentive and fun to talk to
@@ashlara1330 Liel Lowendes. Another of her books "How to make anyone fall in love with you" is also a great read, and tips can be transferred to friends etc
One thing I learned far too recently: All of the negative things that people have said to me in my life ALL PUT TOGETHER doesn't compare with the negativity I can give myself from five minutes with my own thoughts. Nobody is actually thinking all those things I am thinking! Or if they are they don't tell me, which is nearly the same thing from my perspective, right. Anyway, you're a real star. I wish there were voices out there when I was like 20, and I'm glad to listen to it today too; I hope someone that needs to hear this hears it rather than listens to the various bad opinions out there about how to present yourself to others. Cheers!
I agree to being yourself, I've always told people that "cool" to me isn't necessarily what I'm interested in, I find people "cool" when they are truly themselves and have their own deep interests. I think the biggest problem for most people is other peoples acceptance to other peoples interests. Some people will shut off as soon as you start to talk about something they arent interested in which can lead to alot of awkward situations. That being said, you're completely right with the listening aspect. If more people just decided to listen instead of waiting for their turn to talk, I'm sure everyone would find alot more interesting things in one an other
People often forget what you’ve said, but they remember how you made them feel. I remind myself that a lot - even during a social blunder, people likely won’t hold it against you if they can tell you’re trying to understand and be kind.
I love how this guy just popped up in my feed on day, the "no one knows you/advertising" video, and I just saw someone with such a unique perspective, insight, and presentation on things. He just talked into the camera about ragebait marketing, I immediately subscribed and this is another great video. A rare YT algorithm W.
I'm actually pretty good at holding a conversation now, only problem is that my social anxiety still wins out in a lot of situations. I had what seems in retrospect to have been an obvious missed connection with a very cute girl waiting for the bus last week and it's been killing me. Even in the worst case, having endured an awkward situation would've been so much better than how never knowing feels. It feels really stupid, and is the #1 thing I'd like to change about myself
I isolate a lot because of low self confidence. I never feel like I’m enough for people.. not interesting enough, or fun enough, it’s exhausting. So I isolate. I don’t even respond to texts anymore, and it eats away at me. It’s very lonely, yet I don’t want to talk to people, because it’s not fun. I numb by myself with scrolling, alcohol, binge eating, smoking weed. And In return, that’s all made me even more boring. I feel my personality getting more dull with the addictions and lack of social interactions. Idk how to pull myself out of this vicious cycle
drop the alcohol first. exercise; starting with walks etc. progressing to workouts delete the stupid apps, keep the good ones once you start to exercise you will feel inclined to eat more nutrition in time your mental capacity will open up to allow you to retain more knowledge good luck
keeping yourself clean, wearing clean and stylish clothes, sleeping an appriopriate amount of time, eating until you're not the hungry, drinking water, all of this goes a long way into making room for confidence to come in. It seems basic but it works. I'm not telling as soon as you do it you'll be super confident, but I have observed from personal experience that I also tend to isolate myself, and self loathe when I neglect eating, showering or sleeping. Next up, you could try doing/joining up classes for whatever activity you might find interesting, like drawing, pottery, music lessons, archery, whatever you find cool. Focus on the activity, but at the same time, try striking up a conversation or two to people there, maybe even ask them to go for a meal or a coffee. After all you have something in common (the class/activity you both do), so that's something you can talk about with your new friend. A great activity is exercise, stuff like running, the gym (and even walks) are great. The gym is really good cause as you keep showing up, you'll become more and more fit, and that might improve your self perception, in turn increasing your confidence. It might be hard at the beginning, but keep showing up, even when you dont feel like it, cause it'll pay off. Tackling addictions like alcohol, weed, and similar is very hard if you dont have a proper social group. Stuff like this is a problem, but they're also the first things you might do when you're stressed, depressed or lonely, acting as fast-acting "solutions" to your bad feels. In turn, their effects make cause more problems, so it's a really bad feedback loop, hence why you gotta have friends to support you, so that when you feel bad, you can contact them instead. It's sadly not as easy as just cutting drinking (tho you might try that, it never hurts) Making art, and (intentionally) consuming it might help with the personality bit, as you'll know what you like, and can talk about stuff you've seen or made. Stuff like music, games (look out for indie games, cause AAA games rarely inspire me as art), paintings, or just doodles. Lastly, just keep showing up, doing it, even if you suck at the beginning, even if you have bad days, if you keep going through, you'll eventually make it out of the tunnel, Good luck bro.
As someone with social anxiety, the 1# thing you need to remember is that your imagination will always be worse than reality. Take it step by step, focus on one thing. Stop drinking, then try going outside more, at least go see the light of day in your yard. Talk to yourself like you're talking to a good friend, especially in hard moments. Whatever you do, don't self deprecate because the more you tell yourself something, the more you'll believe it, so tell yourself nicer things from now on (they don't have to be cheesy, just fair). I know it's easier said than done, that's why you gotta take it little by little to build up the momentum. It is absolutely doable and i believe in you man
I thing that you should mention, is balance is important in everything. Some people have no confidence, some people are overly confident. Some people believe they have no personality, some people believe that their personality is all that they are, and it takes over their lives.
I write poetry that never gets published. Im a half hipster, half chav (if that makes sense in some perverse stereotypical way) who doesnt fit in with most of the guys from my old estste or the upper middle class creatives that have gentrified my neighbourhood in London. I have chronic ADHD and definitely someone who is underacheiver relative to my intellect. I try and connect with others because it rarely comes to me, but I always feel this sinking feeling of imposter syndrome in a lot of my attempted connections.
I think social media has made us self conscious, like we're posting to the world even if its just you speaking to one person in a room alone. Nothings written in stone, be free!
been dealing with social anxiety since middle school and it never really got better until recently. I just started by talking with my older coworkers, it was a good start and i’ve definitely gotten a little better.
Love this video. Feels like it's tailored for me, it's kinda reminiscent of the old UA-cam. Love how authentic you are, and you're right, people are drawn to how genuine you are with your content. Bless you and I hope you make more videos ❤
Beautiful video. It just popped up on my UA-cam and I naturally clicked on it. I've had, and still have sometimes that feeling about something that I've said is wrong or awkward. I didn't align myself with people that resonated with my emotions and values, I was really hurt. I've put out on my Insta various perspectives and emotions, looking for people and their likes to validate them. I was wrong. People didn't care and it just pushed me back with it. Now I'm more open, as I've realized that I can share my emotions and opinions (not hurting anyone around me though) and I feel better. So, your message that nobody cares gives ourselves the freedom of expression without the fear of what others might think. Thank you for your contribution for collective consciousness. Wish you and all beautiful people here to find their true authentic self. Lots of love ❤️
I had a friend who once told me, "Sometimes I feel like you don’t understand what people are talking about." That comment really hurt me. We’re not as close anymore, but it still haunts me. I’m not into politics or science, I don’t read much... I feel like I don’t know anything. My therapist told me once: "But you do know things. You're interesting. You don’t talk a lot, but you feel. You understand the world through emotions and experiences, not just concepts and terms."
You're doing gods work. Nobody ever gives the little details to how conversations work, like, asking questions back, its such a simple thing that makes converations flow yet nobody brings it up, its part of the active listening part. Something that can seriously help is making a lil basic script for yourself with "goal posts", once a conversation starts (maybe through observation), and the person you've asked about something is finished talking, think of a relating question to the topic, even if its vaguely related (the video talks about this). People LOVE talking about themselves and their interests so it works great just to be that listener, and then you can make your exit if you dont want to talk/dont know what to say, it can be as simple as "well it was interesting and fun talking but I gotta go im on a schedule" with a polite smile and the other person will usually let you get off and do your own thing etc etc. You can customize your intros and outros to your pleasing. All it takes is making one small conversation with somebody to open up the flood gates to your own confidence, you'll actually feel pretty damn normal and relaxed after. Its really hard to get a basic structure when you're in the dark, these videos help alot
Great message. Owning your fails with humour is great because you get to feel good about yourself for a: not doing an impression of a coatstand, b: breaking through the awkwardness and taking the social initiative for once c: being funny, which inspires a lot more confidence than just feeling bad about your own awkwardness d: entertaining others and e: not dealing with a memory of embarrassment but a reminiscing of merriment of which you were the center. The challenging bit is to let go of being too serious about how you appear to others. I tel myself: I wasn't being smart in that actual moment anyway, doubling down on the hilarity won't make it worse. And hey, they may be laughing at me, instead of with me, whichever way, "this person made me laugh" is not the worst reputation to have.
Thank you so much. I've decided on going out more this year after a year or so of isolating myself. A few days ago I went out and nothing but awkwardness. Tonight I'm going out again and just needed to hear SOMETHING. Because I feel trapped inside my boring body. But you made me feel better, I'm going to use the personality in the box thing tonight in a conversation. I have a tendency of dublicating conversations. I hate having the same conversation with everyone. That will be the next thing to work on.
Totally Agree! What I would add to that is that if you are passionate about something very niche it is good to give a bit of context about the topic and express why it is important to you. If others can understand why you want to talk about a given topic they generally feel interested and at ease. Also just a reminder to not forget that when people are telling awesome stories it is but a highlight and their lives will undoubtedly be made up for the majority out of mundane situations too.
I have always felt that diversity encourages unity. If you are only worried about how you are similar to others, you will never sit comfortable with the reality of nuance. You will try and snip and weed out any imagined fault. You aren't everyone's cup of tea, but who the fuck cares, they aren't drinking it.
Beautiful, mate!! Loved your conclusion.. what you said about being true to yourself and also not giving a shit, and that just being the recipe for it working out. All the best! ❤
Thank you for this video. I’m apart of this punk scene down in Miami, Florida. I spend a lot of my time performing and socializing and I’d always beat myself up for days, weeks about how much of an awkward person I am. At this point, you’re right, I should take myself less seriously and just be myself. I don’t need to be this super cool “rock star”.
Thanks for sharing Jonny. I don’t talk to my coworkers or strangers because of the title of this video. I don’t think I’m interesting. I’m in my mid 20s working a 9-5 office job. I don’t have a lot of experience or skills to promote and excel at projects. At work I don’t talk and avoid eye contact with coworkers who walk by my desk (which is pretty frequent). I spend most of my free time playing video games, browsing the subreddits of those video games, watching youtube and sometimes twitch. I hate going to work because of this. I want to change but I feel like I dug myself into a deep hole.
@ZEK.0 That's crazyyyy. I got into carravagio and art generally for 3 reasons. The first was the limited netflix series ripley , the second I cant fully remember but the third was when a friend showed me versace off that westside record
One thing a good friend of mine said is that the awkward silence you sometimes feel with friends isn't necessarily a bad thing and is only really awkward if you think it is. Oftentimes, just being there with someone, even when there is nothing being said, can help strengthen your bonds with people.
Hey I just wanted to say I really like your videos it really feels like I’m talking with a friend in a park late at night and I also use your videos to practice my English so, being you benefits people in more than ways you could imagine! Which is inline with what your saying in this video, just you talking by itself is useful to a person like me that is trying to sound more native in English! Keep doing you man 🫵
I really enjoy the style of your recordings. I also really enjoy your message. It has been very grounding and im glad to have stumbled upon it. This is the third video of yours ive had served at the top of my feed. Thank you for what you've done here.
I've been "In the little box" before, and it was the most miserable I've ever been. At the same time, it felt impossible to break out of that. People say baby steps, it'll get better, and that sounds super corny, but each step of confidence I got with a good interaction from someone because I was generally interested in what they were saying broke me "outta da box".
Oh I have many epic stories and adventures to tell from my younger wilder years, but alas I cannot tell them here without getting immediately banned. So I am delegated to tell the tame happenings from the past decade, which are very mild by comparison. There is a very big difference between a young musicians adventures, and a old musicians adventures. 🤘🧙🏻♂🤘
You know when you meet new ppl with your friends and you start sharing epic stories of some wild moments you had together. Well I'm the guy ppl would always forget was also there with them. It would be like "So Dave, Steve, Bill, and... someone else was there.. Jakeee? idk lol anyways...". Cant be the interesting guy for shit, but I like to hear other ppls stories more anyways. Gives you perspective on things, new info you never heard, good laughs... more often than not I learned about something that helped me in some areas of my life through a random conversation with someone id never see again.
I just did. Great advice. Who would think that it is that simple. Good luck everyone of you on this journey called life. And for future me(I know you like reading past comments, you little archivist) It was the guy next dorm 414.
Thank you for the motivation - we just started posting this year, and although it's difficult to watch our own videos, the positive feedback we've received has been very encouraging.
Great approach to life in general. Being your authentic self and steadfastly sticking to your principles gets tons more respect than the db poser crying out for attention. Plus it just feels good!
Absorbing is the way to be interesting... if thats the case one key factor on where you will go in life socially is who you absorb. Therefore, you MUST be smart with who you choose to have in your life!
I don't see myself as a very confident person (I'm slowly managing to overcome that) and because of that I don't think I come off as particularly confident either, but I met a new person through an event where I was speaking and afterwards we went out. We were talking about confidence and one of the first things that person said to me was that they were surprised I didn't feel confident because I absolutely came off like I was when I spoke. They said it with such earnest and so casually that it kind of shocked me into realising, 'oh wow I really perceive myself in such a distorted way'. Idk guess I'm just trying to say I'd do absolute numbers if I just had confidence in myself and it's a little bit silly, but also really interesting, that such a trivial thing like our self perception stops us from being the best versions of ourselves.
Thank you, I really needed to hear this. I've a friend that used to talk in great detail about games she'd been playing and I honestly had no interest in, and I'd basically just switch off when she started going on about them, and now she doesn't talk about them anymore. But the bad thing is I only switched off because I felt like she wasn't interested in hearing about anything I'm interested in either, when actually that's all in my head coming from projection and/or self-consciousness. Our conversations could be much more interesting if I encourage her to speak freely again and also wax lyrical about my own interests sometimes.
I'm a composer, visual artist, game developer, and writer, all of which encompass my career. My day job is frying chicken at a deli. Amongst the composers, I'm not the best composer but I may be the best at frying chicken. Amongst the deli workers, I'm not the best at frying chicken but I may be the best composer. Yet in each arena, I have plenty to learn from others.
advice for how to move forward with coding? I'm stuck at getters and setters and dunno how tf to make actual programs
@@ketongu start with something you like, but not too complex.
You can make plenty of things already without having to use getters and setters
@ketongu start with something stupidly small and simple. Once you have the hang of it, slowly build up and out bit by bit. I'm still a beginner at coding and this is what I always do when learning a new concept.
@@JacobMotlMedia interesting!
@@JacobMotlMedia well put man
my cousin once told me to take myself less seriously, which at first i found irritating but it ended up sticking with me
@@ketongu yeah I know, those kind of comments feels like a personal attack at first
@@ketongu it's true innit? it's very mature to be okay with not appearing mature
How u do that wdym
Loved these
> allow yourself to be yourself
> no man is an island
> be yourself and people will come along for the ride
> even a low IQ person is intelligent in other forms; emotional intelligence, statistical intelligence etc
@@rovertyenrab My theory is that people with a high level of emotional intelligence will have an acceptable IQ, but most folks with a high IQ don't have the same balance in emotional intelligence.
I read "how to talk to anyone" before I went to uni, one of the tips was to just ask questions, people love talking about themselves! And the person will come away with the impression that you were a really interesting person.
@@paulwood4142 hi, just wondering who is the book by? Because when I looked it up seemed like several different authors came up.
I think he's talking about the one by Leil Lowndes. Read it too and it's a great book.
This is good advice, but it doesn't work with everyone.
@@paulwood4142 Haha this was something I picked up after years of flopping conversations I didn’t wanna be in. Just asking questions about some of the missing pieces in a story goes a long way, and like you said, makes you look way more attentive and fun to talk to
@@ashlara1330 Liel Lowendes. Another of her books "How to make anyone fall in love with you" is also a great read, and tips can be transferred to friends etc
Bro. When he pointed at the cyclist and said “he done it I bet” 😂
Felt like an Inbetweeners moment "he done it!"
@@darthriahuz1 inbetweeners like inbetween animators?
@@darthriahuz1 great tv show
That part almost felt scripted with how perfectly timed it was, this guy is great
OMG 😭 I read your comment exactly at the second he pointed out which made it 10x funnier loool
One thing I learned far too recently: All of the negative things that people have said to me in my life ALL PUT TOGETHER doesn't compare with the negativity I can give myself from five minutes with my own thoughts. Nobody is actually thinking all those things I am thinking! Or if they are they don't tell me, which is nearly the same thing from my perspective, right.
Anyway, you're a real star. I wish there were voices out there when I was like 20, and I'm glad to listen to it today too; I hope someone that needs to hear this hears it rather than listens to the various bad opinions out there about how to present yourself to others. Cheers!
Dear your comment helps as much! CHEERS!
I can relate to this so badly, sadly.
Bro, yer sound. Don’t worry.x
... we can be are own worst friend.
If we spoke to someone the way we speak to ourselves we'd get arrested!
@@DJCJ999 Thts so true mate I have never even heard someone in life giving th range abuse I have given myself in th past. Spot on brother.x
i really admire your ability to be able to concentrate on talking, while so much is happening around you
I agree to being yourself, I've always told people that "cool" to me isn't necessarily what I'm interested in, I find people "cool" when they are truly themselves and have their own deep interests.
I think the biggest problem for most people is other peoples acceptance to other peoples interests. Some people will shut off as soon as you start to talk about something they arent interested in which can lead to alot of awkward situations. That being said, you're completely right with the listening aspect. If more people just decided to listen instead of waiting for their turn to talk, I'm sure everyone would find alot more interesting things in one an other
May you find the person who is glad to listen to you
In my head cannon he is the biggest 40k nerd and is working as hard as he possibly can to make it seem like he's not :)
People often forget what you’ve said, but they remember how you made them feel.
I remind myself that a lot - even during a social blunder, people likely won’t hold it against you if they can tell you’re trying to understand and be kind.
I love how this guy just popped up in my feed on day, the "no one knows you/advertising" video, and I just saw someone with such a unique perspective, insight, and presentation on things. He just talked into the camera about ragebait marketing, I immediately subscribed and this is another great video. A rare YT algorithm W.
@@H-Real_8 same I've been watching his videos every day since then
The no one knows you video I found as well. Love this
i brush my teeth to this ish
@@noahdickinson7263 i eat my breakfast to this
me taking a bath rn
Exactly this
I'm actually pretty good at holding a conversation now, only problem is that my social anxiety still wins out in a lot of situations.
I had what seems in retrospect to have been an obvious missed connection with a very cute girl waiting for the bus last week and it's been killing me. Even in the worst case, having endured an awkward situation would've been so much better than how never knowing feels.
It feels really stupid, and is the #1 thing I'd like to change about myself
How did u get better at conversation
I isolate a lot because of low self confidence. I never feel like I’m enough for people.. not interesting enough, or fun enough, it’s exhausting. So I isolate. I don’t even respond to texts anymore, and it eats away at me. It’s very lonely, yet I don’t want to talk to people, because it’s not fun. I numb by myself with scrolling, alcohol, binge eating, smoking weed. And In return, that’s all made me even more boring. I feel my personality getting more dull with the addictions and lack of social interactions. Idk how to pull myself out of this vicious cycle
drop the alcohol first. exercise; starting with walks etc. progressing to workouts
delete the stupid apps, keep the good ones
once you start to exercise you will feel inclined to eat more nutrition
in time your mental capacity will open up to allow you to retain more knowledge
good luck
keeping yourself clean, wearing clean and stylish clothes, sleeping an appriopriate amount of time, eating until you're not the hungry, drinking water, all of this goes a long way into making room for confidence to come in. It seems basic but it works. I'm not telling as soon as you do it you'll be super confident, but I have observed from personal experience that I also tend to isolate myself, and self loathe when I neglect eating, showering or sleeping.
Next up, you could try doing/joining up classes for whatever activity you might find interesting, like drawing, pottery, music lessons, archery, whatever you find cool. Focus on the activity, but at the same time, try striking up a conversation or two to people there, maybe even ask them to go for a meal or a coffee. After all you have something in common (the class/activity you both do), so that's something you can talk about with your new friend.
A great activity is exercise, stuff like running, the gym (and even walks) are great. The gym is really good cause as you keep showing up, you'll become more and more fit, and that might improve your self perception, in turn increasing your confidence. It might be hard at the beginning, but keep showing up, even when you dont feel like it, cause it'll pay off.
Tackling addictions like alcohol, weed, and similar is very hard if you dont have a proper social group. Stuff like this is a problem, but they're also the first things you might do when you're stressed, depressed or lonely, acting as fast-acting "solutions" to your bad feels. In turn, their effects make cause more problems, so it's a really bad feedback loop, hence why you gotta have friends to support you, so that when you feel bad, you can contact them instead. It's sadly not as easy as just cutting drinking (tho you might try that, it never hurts)
Making art, and (intentionally) consuming it might help with the personality bit, as you'll know what you like, and can talk about stuff you've seen or made. Stuff like music, games (look out for indie games, cause AAA games rarely inspire me as art), paintings, or just doodles.
Lastly, just keep showing up, doing it, even if you suck at the beginning, even if you have bad days, if you keep going through, you'll eventually make it out of the tunnel,
Good luck bro.
As someone with social anxiety, the 1# thing you need to remember is that your imagination will always be worse than reality. Take it step by step, focus on one thing. Stop drinking, then try going outside more, at least go see the light of day in your yard. Talk to yourself like you're talking to a good friend, especially in hard moments. Whatever you do, don't self deprecate because the more you tell yourself something, the more you'll believe it, so tell yourself nicer things from now on (they don't have to be cheesy, just fair). I know it's easier said than done, that's why you gotta take it little by little to build up the momentum. It is absolutely doable and i believe in you man
i love british people
we hate ourselves
And people in general
This guy is a rare breed now, he is like the old version of the British.
@@ketongu Too many of us do.
And british humor. Their self awareness is refreshing.
I thing that you should mention, is balance is important in everything. Some people have no confidence, some people are overly confident. Some people believe they have no personality, some people believe that their personality is all that they are, and it takes over their lives.
''You're not a singular entity amongst a sea of robots'' 💙
I write poetry that never gets published. Im a half hipster, half chav (if that makes sense in some perverse stereotypical way) who doesnt fit in with most of the guys from my old estste or the upper middle class creatives that have gentrified my neighbourhood in London. I have chronic ADHD and definitely someone who is underacheiver relative to my intellect. I try and connect with others because it rarely comes to me, but I always feel this sinking feeling of imposter syndrome in a lot of my attempted connections.
This is cool and refreshing. Thanks for being so real. I really enjoy listening to you.
this video gave me so much of a grounded vibe of one’s self, you know, the kind of thinking where one’s is aware of one’s self and i love that!
You're really doing something special with your videos man. Thanks and looking forward to what else you come up with.
awkwardness is just fine and im sure most of us uninteresting folks have interesting stories.
I think social media has made us self conscious, like we're posting to the world even if its just you speaking to one person in a room alone. Nothings written in stone, be free!
I love this video! It feels like you're just talking to me in a casual way and it's just so comforting, thank you for making this and being you!
Love the night city background 🙏 🌃
I not only love listing to what you talk about (your insights) but also love your delivery and, especially, the look of your videos! Beautiful!
Thank you, man. This is like a side to the therapy.
been dealing with social anxiety since middle school and it never really got better until recently. I just started by talking with my older coworkers, it was a good start and i’ve definitely gotten a little better.
Love this video. Feels like it's tailored for me, it's kinda reminiscent of the old UA-cam. Love how authentic you are, and you're right, people are drawn to how genuine you are with your content. Bless you and I hope you make more videos ❤
Beautiful video. It just popped up on my UA-cam and I naturally clicked on it. I've had, and still have sometimes that feeling about something that I've said is wrong or awkward. I didn't align myself with people that resonated with my emotions and values, I was really hurt. I've put out on my Insta various perspectives and emotions, looking for people and their likes to validate them. I was wrong. People didn't care and it just pushed me back with it. Now I'm more open, as I've realized that I can share my emotions and opinions (not hurting anyone around me though) and I feel better. So, your message that nobody cares gives ourselves the freedom of expression without the fear of what others might think. Thank you for your contribution for collective consciousness. Wish you and all beautiful people here to find their true authentic self. Lots of love ❤️
Don't say the good answer, but the REAL answer.
I had a friend who once told me, "Sometimes I feel like you don’t understand what people are talking about." That comment really hurt me. We’re not as close anymore, but it still haunts me. I’m not into politics or science, I don’t read much... I feel like I don’t know anything.
My therapist told me once: "But you do know things. You're interesting. You don’t talk a lot, but you feel. You understand the world through emotions and experiences, not just concepts and terms."
You're doing gods work. Nobody ever gives the little details to how conversations work, like, asking questions back, its such a simple thing that makes converations flow yet nobody brings it up, its part of the active listening part.
Something that can seriously help is making a lil basic script for yourself with "goal posts", once a conversation starts (maybe through observation), and the person you've asked about something is finished talking, think of a relating question to the topic, even if its vaguely related (the video talks about this). People LOVE talking about themselves and their interests so it works great just to be that listener, and then you can make your exit if you dont want to talk/dont know what to say, it can be as simple as "well it was interesting and fun talking but I gotta go im on a schedule" with a polite smile and the other person will usually let you get off and do your own thing etc etc. You can customize your intros and outros to your pleasing. All it takes is making one small conversation with somebody to open up the flood gates to your own confidence, you'll actually feel pretty damn normal and relaxed after.
Its really hard to get a basic structure when you're in the dark, these videos help alot
Hey man, I love to hear what you’ve got to say, really makes me rethink everything that is setting me back personally, so thank you very much.
I really like how you framed this video, visually appealing with the depth of field, light sources and background
You really are the little voice in my head, just much more well spoken coming out.
Great message.
Owning your fails with humour is great because you get to feel good about yourself for a: not doing an impression of a coatstand, b: breaking through the awkwardness and taking the social initiative for once c: being funny, which inspires a lot more confidence than just feeling bad about your own awkwardness d: entertaining others and e: not dealing with a memory of embarrassment but a reminiscing of merriment of which you were the center.
The challenging bit is to let go of being too serious about how you appear to others. I tel myself: I wasn't being smart in that actual moment anyway, doubling down on the hilarity won't make it worse. And hey, they may be laughing at me, instead of with me, whichever way, "this person made me laugh" is not the worst reputation to have.
Thank you so much. I've decided on going out more this year after a year or so of isolating myself.
A few days ago I went out and nothing but awkwardness. Tonight I'm going out again and just needed to hear SOMETHING. Because I feel trapped inside my boring body.
But you made me feel better, I'm going to use the personality in the box thing tonight in a conversation. I have a tendency of dublicating conversations.
I hate having the same conversation with everyone. That will be the next thing to work on.
Totally Agree! What I would add to that is that if you are passionate about something very niche it is good to give a bit of context about the topic and express why it is important to you. If others can understand why you want to talk about a given topic they generally feel interested and at ease. Also just a reminder to not forget that when people are telling awesome stories it is but a highlight and their lives will undoubtedly be made up for the majority out of mundane situations too.
Thanks, didn’t know I needed this today.
I have always felt that diversity encourages unity. If you are only worried about how you are similar to others, you will never sit comfortable with the reality of nuance. You will try and snip and weed out any imagined fault.
You aren't everyone's cup of tea, but who the fuck cares, they aren't drinking it.
You seem like a great person. This advice is very cool, and I admire anyone who can simply stand in front of a camera and just talk.
Bro definitely knows a lot about warhammer 40k
Haven’t wept in a while, thank u
I love the composition of this. Gives a nostalgic vintage vibe. Also a great message! Have a great day good sir
Man, i don't know exactly how i have fell on your pit, but thanks to the algorithm.
You mean a LOT to people who watch you.
Thanks kid.
Beautiful, mate!! Loved your conclusion.. what you said about being true to yourself and also not giving a shit, and that just being the recipe for it working out. All the best! ❤
so proud of u man
you have know idea how much ur voice just comforted me
I’m so glad I found your channel! You have such a way with words to uplift my spirits.
Thank you for this video. I’m apart of this punk scene down in Miami, Florida. I spend a lot of my time performing and socializing and I’d always beat myself up for days, weeks about how much of an awkward person I am. At this point, you’re right, I should take myself less seriously and just be myself. I don’t need to be this super cool “rock star”.
Thanks for sharing Jonny. I don’t talk to my coworkers or strangers because of the title of this video. I don’t think I’m interesting. I’m in my mid 20s working a 9-5 office job. I don’t have a lot of experience or skills to promote and excel at projects. At work I don’t talk and avoid eye contact with coworkers who walk by my desk (which is pretty frequent). I spend most of my free time playing video games, browsing the subreddits of those video games, watching youtube and sometimes twitch. I hate going to work because of this. I want to change but I feel like I dug myself into a deep hole.
UA-cam at its core,love it ❤️
Very reassuring and comforting, thank you.
My favourite channel on UA-cam. Cheers mate
@ZEK.0 yooooo is that carravagios david and goliath? I have the later version of that painting before he died on my lock screen. I love his work
@ absolutely is , and me too! Discovered it from the album art of Westside Gunn’s ‘Pray for Paris’ .
this tiny thread just made me smile. (:
@ZEK.0 That's crazyyyy. I got into carravagio and art generally for 3 reasons. The first was the limited netflix series ripley , the second I cant fully remember but the third was when a friend showed me versace off that westside record
@@suppifier6692 fucking mega. amazing how we can discover things through other pieces of media. Versace is a great track too! nice one
love the ambiance and the thought is comforting
This made me smile thank you
You are my new favourite person on UA-cam. You rock gentle giant!
Thank you for sharing, it really helps me.
One thing a good friend of mine said is that the awkward silence you sometimes feel with friends isn't necessarily a bad thing and is only really awkward if you think it is. Oftentimes, just being there with someone, even when there is nothing being said, can help strengthen your bonds with people.
Hey I just wanted to say I really like your videos it really feels like I’m talking with a friend in a park late at night and I also use your videos to practice my English so, being you benefits people in more than ways you could imagine! Which is inline with what your saying in this video, just you talking by itself is useful to a person like me that is trying to sound more native in English! Keep doing you man 🫵
Thank you for trying to helping others like me. Not perfect warm talk is enough some times.
u r so cool brother
thank u for talking bout this
I really enjoy the style of your recordings. I also really enjoy your message. It has been very grounding and im glad to have stumbled upon it. This is the third video of yours ive had served at the top of my feed. Thank you for what you've done here.
Love this thank you ❤
Needed to hear this. Cheers man !
Just Mozza stood in the evening in London with the C100 talking ! Love it
I would've loved to have watched this 10 years ago, and the message is always important to remember regardless. Another banger.
wow. I did not know that... god bless you Jonny boy!🙏
You are dope, and I'm rooting for you!! Thank you for this!
I really needed to hear this omg 😭 thank you!
Jonny you are an angel
I love this! 🔥
I really appreciate the message!
another banger
I share the same sentiment as a whole. Being content with oneself and who you are is important. We're all interesting!
Hah, I needed this video today. Most people will forget what you told them right after you told them.
Ngl the thumbnail hooked me in coz of the moustache, reminded me of Harry dubois from disco elysium and ended up staying coz the video is fire
I've been "In the little box" before, and it was the most miserable I've ever been. At the same time, it felt impossible to break out of that. People say baby steps, it'll get better, and that sounds super corny, but each step of confidence I got with a good interaction from someone because I was generally interested in what they were saying broke me "outta da box".
This is brilliant
Thanks jonny, glad I found your channel.
Oh I have many epic stories and adventures to tell from my younger wilder years, but alas I cannot tell them here without getting immediately banned. So I am delegated to tell the tame happenings from the past decade, which are very mild by comparison.
There is a very big difference between a young musicians adventures, and a old musicians adventures. 🤘🧙🏻♂🤘
Loved that. Thank you!
You know when you meet new ppl with your friends and you start sharing epic stories of some wild moments you had together. Well I'm the guy ppl would always forget was also there with them. It would be like "So Dave, Steve, Bill, and... someone else was there.. Jakeee? idk lol anyways...". Cant be the interesting guy for shit, but I like to hear other ppls stories more anyways. Gives you perspective on things, new info you never heard, good laughs... more often than not I learned about something that helped me in some areas of my life through a random conversation with someone id never see again.
Your channel is great dude. Really enjoying your content so far.
this is probably top 10 channels on this platform. Incredibly unique and personal ✌
I just did. Great advice. Who would think that it is that simple. Good luck everyone of you on this journey called life.
And for future me(I know you like reading past comments, you little archivist) It was the guy next dorm 414.
This thumbnail looks so awesome, would make for a great Midwest emo coverart
Thank you for the motivation - we just started posting this year, and although it's difficult to watch our own videos, the positive feedback we've received has been very encouraging.
Great approach to life in general. Being your authentic self and steadfastly sticking to your principles gets tons more respect than the db poser crying out for attention. Plus it just feels good!
I really needed this today❤
I like this. You cool guy 👍
Wow what a wholesome video
Thank you. You have helped me a lot
Thank you Jonny
Absorbing is the way to be interesting... if thats the case one key factor on where you will go in life socially is who you absorb. Therefore, you MUST be smart with who you choose to have in your life!
I don't see myself as a very confident person (I'm slowly managing to overcome that) and because of that I don't think I come off as particularly confident either, but I met a new person through an event where I was speaking and afterwards we went out. We were talking about confidence and one of the first things that person said to me was that they were surprised I didn't feel confident because I absolutely came off like I was when I spoke. They said it with such earnest and so casually that it kind of shocked me into realising, 'oh wow I really perceive myself in such a distorted way'.
Idk guess I'm just trying to say I'd do absolute numbers if I just had confidence in myself and it's a little bit silly, but also really interesting, that such a trivial thing like our self perception stops us from being the best versions of ourselves.
are ya still confident
Thank you 🙏
"Say you like Warhammer 40k"
> stops painting for a second
Thank you, I really needed to hear this. I've a friend that used to talk in great detail about games she'd been playing and I honestly had no interest in, and I'd basically just switch off when she started going on about them, and now she doesn't talk about them anymore.
But the bad thing is I only switched off because I felt like she wasn't interested in hearing about anything I'm interested in either, when actually that's all in my head coming from projection and/or self-consciousness. Our conversations could be much more interesting if I encourage her to speak freely again and also wax lyrical about my own interests sometimes.