AUTISM | meltdown & shutdown - what does it mean and how do I help?

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  • Опубліковано 5 жов 2024
  • In this video I explain what meltdown and shutdown are including the similarities, the differences, why they occur and how we can support a child during either meltdown or shutdown. Both meltdown and shutdown are common amongst children and young people on the autistic spectrum, who struggle with emotional regulation or who have experienced trauma.
    Here are links I referred to during the video:
    Gareth Morewood on twitter: / gdmorewood
    Gareth’s website: www.gdmorewood.com
    Studio III: www.studio3.org
    Gareth Interviews Pooky about autism: • Autism, Anorexia & Me ...
    I interview Gareth about the low arousal approach: • Inclusion using the Lo...
    Book: The Reflective Journey: A practitioners guide to the Low Arousal approach: amzn.to/2KXT3wW
    Book: Is It OK to Ask Questions about Autism? amzn.to/2KQ0Y0C
    BITESIZE CPD | Using stock phrases to respond calmly to meltdowns: • BITESIZE CPD | Using s...
    3 ways to calm things down - practical ideas for managing anger & anxiety: • 3 ways to calm things ...
    SELF-HARM | 12 ways to get through the next minute when you feel the urge to self-harm: • SELF-HARM | 12 ways to... (these ideas can also be used to buy time for calming when someone is feeling overwhelmed).
    --
    I hope you find this video helpful. Please take a moment to leave a comment about what you did and didn't like or sharing your own ideas or experiences.
    Please also to let me know what other topics you'd like me to tackle in future videos and subscribe to be kept up to date with new videos as they’re published.
    You can also follow me on
    Twitter: / pookyh
    Instagram: / pookyh
    Facebook: / pookyh
    LinkedIn: / pooky
    Newsletter sign up: www.pookyknigh...
    You might also be interested in my books:
    The Mentally Healthy Schools Workbook: amzn.to/2YKfT0B
    Can I tell you about self-harm: amzn.to/2EkpcNc
    The Healthy Coping Colouring Book & Journal: amzn.to/2SfT4xG
    Using Poetry to Promote Talking and Healing: amzn.to/2BV80ML
    Self-Harm and Eating Disorders in Schools: amzn.to/2SSUJyN

КОМЕНТАРІ • 124

  • @laviniavolland2696
    @laviniavolland2696 5 років тому +102

    When I was a child my mother always used to give me a cold, wet washing cloth when I had meltdowns that I could put onto my face. It not only cooled me down and distracted me but I could sort of hide behind it and didn’t have to look at my surroundings. I still sometimes use this when I’m feeling especially upset or have a really bad day.

    • @curioustin1562
      @curioustin1562 2 роки тому +9

      My mother did this to me when I had a fever. We didn't know I was autistic until a year ago (I am 27 now.. :p).
      I'll try this - or, tell my close ones to try this, 'cause I'll probably not be able to - next time I have a meltdown. Thanks.

    • @earthshaker5842
      @earthshaker5842 Рік тому +3

      That's really nice and so did my mom even though she didn't know, she knew. Mom's know how to help their babies.

  • @x_Freya.Rose_x
    @x_Freya.Rose_x 3 роки тому +46

    I wish teachers are trained about this. I know I shouldn't get annoyed as it's not their fault. They haven't been educated. I had a particular experience in school where I had a 5 mins minimum presentation. I was DREADING this as I know I cannot speak in front of people without breaking down. I tried to warn and tell teachers about this but they pushed me. I had 2 weeks for my anxiety to build. The day before I had a sensory issue and broke down. My teachers left me crying and said I should be alone (even with signs of hyperventilation and panic) They came back to me not breathing properly (full on hyperventilation) and swaying because I was light headed. They were shouting at me because I wasn't responding because I was shutting down. They said that I was faking to get out of it. I fainted and woke up to my mum lying next to me, holding me close (because she knows it soothes me in a meltdown being help close) and my explaining explaining what happened. They said I was overwhelmed and it was just nerves. My mum knew it wasnt since she's experienced my meltdowns before. We left the school because of their lack of consideration and knowledge

    • @jkka1477
      @jkka1477 3 роки тому +6

      I feel you I go to public schools instead of the more helpful schools (therapy school, private school, disability school) . Because my parents can only afford public schools and the teachers handle it all wrong they’d rather me be safe than happy.

    • @jkka1477
      @jkka1477 3 роки тому +2

      And my mom thought I needed a program, but the program just avoided me from my emotions

    • @gailasprey7787
      @gailasprey7787 Рік тому +3

      I feel my teachers knew I had autism but didn’t understand what the heck that was. They treated me a lot different from everybody else in a bad way. They treated me sort of condescendingly when I cried (the main thing that happens when I’m stressed or upset) and then didn’t understand why I’d never tell them that I was not okay. Once my teacher went as far as to just plain tell me to “Stop” like it was that easy. If they were educated on it or told to do some research on it every once in a while on a good website or with videos by autistic people. Or people with any other disability for that matter. Then I feel this world would be way more easy for me and many others to traverse without as much judgement.

    • @missxapp7559
      @missxapp7559 11 місяців тому

      Omg exactly what i went through 😞 and my teacher called me slow aswell because i was trying to process the question

    • @blendpinexus1416
      @blendpinexus1416 2 місяці тому

      holy shit dude, my shutdowns never hit that point.

  • @bloodgutsandglitter8818
    @bloodgutsandglitter8818 4 роки тому +55

    I am 26 and seeking a diagnosis. This sounds like what happens with me often. My son is 4 and has a diagnosis and I am ashamed to say that this wasn’t obvious to me. 😔 thank you for your videos.

    • @MetallicAGirl14
      @MetallicAGirl14 3 роки тому +6

      Nobody noticed I had Autism until I watched a similar video that displayed symptoms in Girls when I was about 14 I wasn’t diagnosed until 15 and I might not have a diagnosis if I never watched the video

    • @babenberg
      @babenberg Рік тому +2

      Feel awesome that you will understand and give to your daughter a better experience than if you still didn't know, or if you weren't in the spectrum. Enjoy your awesomeness with your kid!!

  • @carljensen5730
    @carljensen5730 4 роки тому +67

    "shutdown" is a good term, but "Meltdown" is a terrible term, and doesn't describe what happens. The industry really needs to change that term. I think "spiral" would be a better term because it describes how Aspies spiral out of control, lashing out at others and increasingly loosing their ability to use rational thinking. These spiral often end in shutdowns where they just run out of steam.

    • @BipolarCourage
      @BipolarCourage 2 роки тому +8

      Meltdown isn't even a clinical term. The closest is "dysregulation"

    • @leahsilvas836
      @leahsilvas836 2 роки тому +7

      No...these terms are fine because they are not the same thing

    • @babenberg
      @babenberg Рік тому +8

      I find this comment somehow self centred, in the way that might describe a personal experience but not a general understanding of each uniqueness.
      Independently of which term we use, and strongly understanding the need to use the most accurate terms all the times, it is important to understand that general situations vary in details from person to person. Thus, using the most commonly accepted words to describe those situations makes more sense than ultra-defining them to be used by all.
      It is very positive that you, if this is the case, can define your experience with such detail, the rest of us can understand you and learn from you. In my case, I will probably use burn-up, more than meltdown, but I can see the relation between both terms, and I prefer to use the one that helps me better to communicate with others.
      For shutdowns, I still have not determined which term might describe better my personal experience. So I'll use shutdown until I find out what works better for me.

    • @stinkyxyla716
      @stinkyxyla716 Рік тому +6

      Personally, I think meltdown is good. Tantrum is bad. Autistic adults exist, and stigma needs to be extinguished. If people were actually educated on disabilities and mental health, they would know what the words "meltdown" in reference to autistic people means. I see where you're coming from with the verbiage sounding off, but I feel as though the negative stigma perpetuated by books,films,organizations, etc. Matter a whole ton more than a word that makes sense for people within the community. I definitely feel like I am spiraling, but those times don't correlate with my meltdowns. Those are definitely not within a spiraling category

    • @earthshaker5842
      @earthshaker5842 Рік тому +2

      @@babenberg Extremely strong comment rosteoman. Extremely strong comment...

  • @InshasChoice
    @InshasChoice 3 роки тому +21

    I've had both in the last 2 days. I'm so used to them that I no longer feel shame. It's not easy when family members gang up on you and belittle you. Humans are horrible. I'm no child either

    • @babenberg
      @babenberg Рік тому +6

      Humans are horrible. Specially neuro-boring-typicals!!! hahahaha
      I'm looking for your smile :)
      Be happy that you are in the awesomeness spectrum. Get rid of unhealthy individuals or groups. There is plenty of people who will understand you and love you.

    • @gailasprey7787
      @gailasprey7787 Рік тому +6

      The fact that people just don’t care when you try to tell them why your crying your heart out over an 18/25 on a math test (my experience) and just assume your being dramatic is awful. I’ve heard people tell me wayyyy too often “stop crying” or rudely say “Why are you crying?” Or “You wouldn’t be crying over ThAt” which is super unhelpful because it just makes me feel like it’s a crime to cry with how often I hear it be used. It doesn’t do anything. I wish people got that.

  • @jessisworld2574
    @jessisworld2574 3 роки тому +11

    I love the color coded books in the background

  • @shaneabarnett9651
    @shaneabarnett9651 3 роки тому +21

    My daughter and I are both on the spectrum - sometimes she will have a shutdown when her brother starts crying and I cant get him to stop. I try to keep a blanket in the van that she can hide under that usually helps a lot

    • @sarahsullivan9014
      @sarahsullivan9014 3 роки тому +5

      My son is still in the process of getting a diagnosis, but uses a blanket over his head too when going to the grocery store. It seems to help him a lot.

  • @gamergurl3648
    @gamergurl3648 2 роки тому +12

    Whenever I get overwhelmed or just really stressed, I listen to music. I put both earbuds in, select a song I like, stare at a fixed spot, and I just let the song play. I focus on one specific sound in the song and try to track it all throughout. Just put all my focus into how that sound goes up or down in notes and stuff like that. It puts my mind on a less stressful subject and helps me calm down. Usually it’s effectiveness is pretty hampered once I reach the point of a shutdown though.

    • @blendpinexus1416
      @blendpinexus1416 2 місяці тому

      the one time i recently had a shutdown like that was after a stressful day at work, was heading home and immediately felt the dissociation and mental lights out of shutdown and so i rapidly pulled into a random parkinglot, shut the car off, and let it go thru. about 15min later of me listening to songs trying to essentially reboot my mind a cop tapped on the window, i basically had no communication abilities and thankfully that cop had an autistic kid so it didn't take long for em to catch on to what was happening. my breath was very uneasy and shaky, my movements were slow, calculated, and rough, my eyes didn't focus on anything specific. this was the first time anyone described what my full mental shutdown looked like externally and it's scary. he intially did call for backup but he did figure out what was going on and called them off before they got there. probably for good reason since concious control has left the building.

  • @bracknellparentcarerforum8705
    @bracknellparentcarerforum8705 5 років тому +18

    We find that we distract our child by talking about when we last did a burp for example which gets him to laugh. Also gentle singing to them and comforting
    words.

  • @SouthAfricaKnowsBest
    @SouthAfricaKnowsBest 2 роки тому +9

    why is every resource about children...why is it never 'person' or ubiquitous. makes me feel like a f**king infant having this

    • @Itsmeemily94
      @Itsmeemily94 Рік тому +3

      I relate, but the truth is there is more information out there for helping children on the spectrum because there is so many resources for teachers and parents,,, dont judge yourself with this condition but instead see that these resources could be helpful for you too! Its unfortunate we didnt have help to develope coping strategies and stock phrases to use when we were younger, however it is not too late :) Also it is easy for people to misunderstand and take it as tantrums so i understand there is alot of negative perceptions out there, but dont be too hard on yourself these people don't understand and thats why they say these hurtful things xxxx

  • @smacksalad
    @smacksalad Рік тому +4

    Had my first recognisable shut down last weekend, around other people. It wasnt pleasant, I essentially started passing out and forcibly shutting down mentally and then physically. I didnt know what was going on, couldnt explain it to myself let alone anyone else. I think I get it now and have shared this video to hopefully explain a little to people. I'm suspecting it wont work and I'll just have to remove myself from the entire situation, but we'll see. The all consuming shame that appeared after the shut down is STILL playing on me a week later. Its a nightmare.

  • @javimartiarena4476
    @javimartiarena4476 Рік тому +2

    It can be pretty tragic/harrowing to watch an asd meltdown

  • @paulandrew6457
    @paulandrew6457 Рік тому +1

    I internalize everything and close down all I need is space and time ALONE to get myself together. I recently had meltdowns after people told me its not healthy to surpress your feelings. All it did was scare the crap out them and make me hate myself. Its not healthy for Autistic people to have meltdowns I thought like the genie had been let out of the bottle and meltdowns became more frequent than shutdowns I've had shutdowns for decades and know how to deal with them. Meltdowns are horrific.

  • @annemariestone6311
    @annemariestone6311 5 років тому +7

    Thank you, your video was quick, but loaded with great and helpful information. Great resources-I am always looking for more information to better understand, help, advocate, and help my son. I have ordered Morewood's book and am looking forward to reading it. I appreciate this. The next meltdown your voice will be in the back of my head saying be calm. 💜

  • @EmergencesDeSens
    @EmergencesDeSens Рік тому +1

    I love the way your books are sorted by colors!

  • @gillgrosset6969
    @gillgrosset6969 4 роки тому +3

    My teenage son calms himself after meltdowns by enveloping. He uses throws, duvet or weighted blanket to completely cover himself. He also likes to be gently tickled, usually he does not like to be touched but when it's on his terms it calms and soothes him.

  • @earthshaker5842
    @earthshaker5842 Рік тому +1

    I'm 25 and dealing with this, been addicted to drugs to cope with it because everyone thinks I'm completely normal and just a spoiled mean brat! I really don't mean to do this! I just can't fucking HELP IT WHEN I GET THE WILLIES AND I GO AHHHH AHAHHHHH AHHHHHH AHHHHH HAHHHHH AHHHHHH AHHHH and then I'm totally calm and I continue on with my day. Yes the child continues on with his day. Whatever, at least I know what's up with me.

  • @Mukundwa
    @Mukundwa Рік тому

    your colour coded books are like a massage to my brain

  • @Knowledge_Seeker64
    @Knowledge_Seeker64 5 місяців тому

    If you do any more videos about autism, please bear in mind that autistic people become adults that might try to learn about themselves through videos like these (like I am right now). Autistic adults may be severely underrepresented in the medical literature, but we absolutely exist. It's not just parents and friends of autistic people who have use for these channels, and to speak only to people that interact with us instead of the people you're talking about is to infantilize us and to practically exclude us from the conversation. I believe that you do care, which is why I write this comment as constructive criticism. Having said that, thanks for making this informative video, it's served as the first stepping stone for my understanding of my own shutdowns.

  • @jmvanzalinge5023
    @jmvanzalinge5023 11 місяців тому

    My son has autism and I've seen connections with myself as I've researched to help him. He definitely has meltdowns and I'm still trying to figure out the best way to help him and regulate myself in those situations so I can be there for him. My main triggers are chaos and conflict and while I shutdown a lot, since having kids I've gotten closer to meltdowns, especially when they're having them to begin with. As a child I would escape, whether that was physically removing myself, curling up in on myself, or by reading a book. But I can't just escape when my children need me so I'm trying to find a better way to handle myself in these situations.

  • @nancywysemen7196
    @nancywysemen7196 9 місяців тому

    mmmm....touching. so glad to be learning more about my family and self and world.

  • @blendpinexus1416
    @blendpinexus1416 2 місяці тому

    honestly they are pretty similar. for me i developed a more muted shutdown state that prevents a meltdown, but meltdowns do occur.

  • @christophercruz5891
    @christophercruz5891 Рік тому +2

    OMG I had no idea these things were different. I'm 25, completely blind, and have some of these tendencies. Usually what happens for me is it starts as a meltdown, where I'm trying to keep everything together. I might bounce on the chair or seat, breathe heavy and may hit my hand on my head but then it turns into a shutdown where I literally can't say a word. I usually get my stuffed dog Collina to pet when I get into one of these modes. I can actually feel a meltdown coming on and I'll tell somebody

    • @PookyH
      @PookyH  Рік тому +1

      Collina sounds great and I'm glad there are peopel you can ask for support when notice the warning signs! It's so helpful when there is someone or something that can help us to manage these moments because they can feel very lonely and scary otherwise...

  • @emoender8672
    @emoender8672 Рік тому

    Thanks for explaining. It made me realise a lot of things about myself as an autistic person. I hope my parents will understand somewhen as well

  • @berserker3414
    @berserker3414 Рік тому +2

    I don't know if I'm autistic because I was never diagnosed (and according to people I'm smart and for some reason they think these two teems are incompatible?) but I can relate to a lot of struggles you all experience.
    One thing I hate it's being emotionally overwhelmed in social situations and being in front of people without having the possibility to leave. I feel trapped. Specially if friends are trying to ''fix'' my bad mood faster when I like to process/cope with things on my own term/alone. I don't like to feel like sht and having to worry about people's moods because I'm not always happy and this somehow affects them (?). I don't have the energy to put a mask on when I'm overwhelmed or to feel joy for you when I'm dealing with a shtty timeline rn.
    I don't know if they do it with good intentions or because my human emotions are a burden to them, but just leave me alone. (They don't ''understand'' why I'm like this... but like, I'm like this with everyone including my parents... they just leave me alone)

  • @BipolarCourage
    @BipolarCourage 2 роки тому +1

    2 psychologists said my shutdowns are from PTSD.

  • @elenavash5440
    @elenavash5440 Рік тому

    Listening this in order to understand how to help myself through my shutdowns

  • @dylancuthbert3207
    @dylancuthbert3207 Рік тому +3

    I had an autistic shutdown 4 years ago and I'd say it was terrible I couldn't speak or function for a year and Ive just found it it happens because the autistic person is being neurotypical in social interaction that they can't cope with but get through. And the recovery I will say I'm not as great with social aspects as I was before I had it :(

    • @dylancuthbert3207
      @dylancuthbert3207 Рік тому

      @pateckaaron7013 misinformation

    • @dylancuthbert3207
      @dylancuthbert3207 Рік тому

      @Lucas Milito misinformation autism is for life

    • @sandravanwijk5699
      @sandravanwijk5699 9 місяців тому

      dude I think he meant before he had an autistic shutdown ..
      @@dylancuthbert3207

  • @AnaLKyo
    @AnaLKyo 2 роки тому +1

    I love the way you articulate!

  • @carmattvidz4426
    @carmattvidz4426 Рік тому

    As a kid when i had a melt down the school would just lock me in a room by myself. I wish she was my teacher back in 1989. I still have bad memories of been locked in those rooms.

  • @saidialifajr504
    @saidialifajr504 2 роки тому +3

    Have you arranged those books according to color? 🤔

  • @iceriahikari4707
    @iceriahikari4707 Рік тому

    Since I was a child I've had a lot of series of meltdowns. Then due to people judging me and telling that I am very dramatic, my meltdowns end up in a shutdown. After an explosion of emotions, I stop moving for several minutes, maybe even 10-30 minutes at most. Even until now, when I am in an uncomfortable situation, I just end up shutting down

  • @jamiestables4283
    @jamiestables4283 4 роки тому +2

    Loved the video, so informative. I've watched a few videos through Creative Education and I can honestly say I've enjoyed every one.

  • @stephaniewright4693
    @stephaniewright4693 3 роки тому +5

    I have meltdowns regularly, I need someone to keep me feeling safe, support and secure but end up not eating or making myself so anxious that I throw up every day before work to hold in my outburst melt downs, meltdowns on your own are hard, I don't know who to call as I don't have many friends and don't want to worry my parents into an early grave! I have meltdowns if I'm tired or just adjust to something new eg going on holiday or returning from holiday even though I'm excited, changing a juice flavour so now I just drink water, anything unexpected. If anyone know tips for adult female meltdowns I would appreciate some information to support me.
    Thanks for the lovely video

    • @InshasChoice
      @InshasChoice 3 роки тому +1

      You can contact me if you want. No, I'm not a creep, I'm weird but that's to be expected. Let me know if you're interested

  • @otakus1216
    @otakus1216 3 роки тому +1

    Smiling and saying it's okay helps

  • @aven_snow
    @aven_snow 9 місяців тому +1

    Any tips on helping a person who is a danger to themselves or others when having a meltdown? I know that restraint is not a good option so what are some alternatives to stop violent behaviour? Thank you.

  • @lornskib
    @lornskib 4 роки тому +2

    Hi Pooky. I am looking forward to trying to use more strategies with my 13 Yr old daughter who is, as yet, undiagnosed. I have viewed this vid through the creative education website whilst beginning their free course on working with a child with PDA. I have recently discovered that I too may well be Autistic and have PDA. We unfortunately have to wait another 2yrs for assessment, we've been waiting for 2 so far!

    • @Itsmeemily94
      @Itsmeemily94 Рік тому

      I hope you and your daughter have finally received diagnosis and learning coping strategies that work for you both, god bless you and your family x

  • @duanescot
    @duanescot Рік тому

    I love how her books are all organized by shades and color..

  • @maviswheeler8318
    @maviswheeler8318 Рік тому

    Hi loved your video
    When my son has moments when it's too much for him I try to find a logic key to open a "door" to take a different path. Example we went back to the train station the wrong way round. Once I realised this my key lock was let's go a different way. Sometimes you have to wait till he's calmer until I can find a logic key . Sometimes you just ride out the storm , be calm and understanding and patient. We can get out of the storm in minutes or an hour. Guess its listening to his fears and trying to work out the trigger. Best wishes to everyone. As parents we are more in tune than passersby give us credit for.

  • @jkka1477
    @jkka1477 3 роки тому +1

    my mom has a low self esteem. I had many meltdowns and behavioral delays, and then I suffered with stress and anxiety. And I had poor vocal control. So that many people thought I was always behaving badly (Including my father) and my sister was only 3 so she was learning from me. I wasn’t actually punished as a toddler so I had to be punished through older childhood. Which sucks!!!!

    • @jkka1477
      @jkka1477 Рік тому

      @lucasmilito7421 I’m not a doctor and I’m sick of getting scammed in the replies about an herbal supplement that “cures” autism, IT DOES NOT. Your child JUST HAS LESS ANXIETY CAUSING BEHAVIORS. Studies PROVED that there’s NO CURE for autism.

  • @claytonstoneman3151
    @claytonstoneman3151 Рік тому

    This made me feel a bit better, thank you:)

  • @terryculkin596
    @terryculkin596 5 років тому +3

    Informative and very helpful Pooky, thank you again. There are lots of things happening in my grandsons life, lots of change, including a new school! I know that this video will be helpful to me and to his dad but would ask, 'is it normal for a youngster to cut off from those who love them, is this part of his as yet un diagnosed Autism or might it Be to do with still missing his grandma? He avoids coming to see me but is still friendly and loving when we are together. I’ve gone off track here, doing a rambley answer sorry.

  • @babenberg
    @babenberg Рік тому

    First 3 seconds of the video and I'm like: "I just love your background color organisation. That's just as cool as it is unrealistic in my library hahahaha."
    I'm an adult with Autism, plus the ADHD freebie.
    I was looking for definitions of meltdown and shutdown, and I thought this was a video for adults within the spectrum. SO I was a bit surprised when I heard "that's the child reacting.." here and there.
    Thoughts up to minute 03:21:
    Anyway, I kept watching, of course, since the explanation just got me at full. Yes I think that for those who find that they are in the spectrum of being awesome, this explanation works. At least, it works for me.
    Also, I think that the same response a child may need from the adult in charge is the same response we as adults can do once we identify those moments. It has been frustrating to me all my life as a father, to not understand why I was overreacting, since I am a very logical person and don't like to get mad at all. Yet sometimes, as explained, I felt overloaded with stimulus or emotions, lost control of my mental process, and had meltdowns where I rise my voice and act angry, even not being angry for any specific reason. Situations like sudden disordered noise, or while starting a day trip and getting all together, forgetting this and that and try to focus on having all under control (a not nice combo AD&ADHD in this cases)... Specially when I wasn't expecting the situation. Because if I know what is going to happen, I can adapt using my logic side, and be ready.
    Thoughts up to minute 05:57:
    Then I find myself writing about not children... sorry. I have no experience with kids. Well, I have experience with an autistic young person, back in time when I had no idea of my own condition, when I was educated to think that autism equals mental illness, when there was no research done, when autism as is wasn't defined, and usually was a side characteristic of a person with more conditions.
    I still find useful the techniques in this video for adults, who can identify the situations by themselves and apply them.
    Thoughts up to minute 06:25:
    That's just gold.
    Final thoughts:
    Thank you for this video. Thank you. I'm literally in tears.
    From the perspective of an autistic person diagnosed in the adulthood, the conclusions that can be reached are vast and important.
    As I said before, adults can understand why, and how to treat ourselves in this situations, and also learn to how to d do with kids. And here I want to add the possibility to reach out to kids within the spectrum that doesn't show qualities of it by masking (among others), and that may lead them to a complex life until adulthood. As we know, kids lack of emotional tools and experience. They are in a constant learning-something-new state, and it take decades for all of us to reach a point where we can start using our knowledge.
    I believe that the inclusion of autistic adults in the educational field of autistic kids is important.
    Personal note:
    I've discovered my autism just at the beginning of this year. It's rough, yet liberating.
    I've been in the health industry since I was born in a medical family. Now three generations of health professionals, and soon the fourth gen is coming.
    I was unable to identify my condition, based on the orthodox ideas from before the 90's.
    I've been working with Down Syndrome people (back in my student days), whom I love the most and are my favourite kind of people, and now I know why I enjoy being and communicating with them so much: They are clear, direct, clean, and full of love. That, for an autistic person like me, is the recipe for an awesome relationship. I can understand them better than I do with neuro-boring-typicals (half joking), and the reason is just that I'm autistic.
    If I could have/met an adult able to identify my condition when I was a kid, many situations could be avoided. That's why it is very important that we share the word, and provide this support to kids who may need it.
    Thank you again for this, and all of your videos.

  • @snowypuff1992
    @snowypuff1992 Рік тому

    Iv found im going into meltdowns and shut down more as i get older im 30 now
    Never been taught to cope or self soothe either

  • @alice_mation
    @alice_mation Рік тому

    Do the steps for meltdowns work for a young adult whose meltdowns consist of saying no one loves them and that they shouldn't exist?

  • @BipolarCourage
    @BipolarCourage 2 роки тому +1

    It is actually pointless to try dialogue if someone is in meltdown or shutdown

    • @Itsmeemily94
      @Itsmeemily94 Рік тому

      Its not "pointless" its just the wrong time to have a dialogue, that person will be able to give you thier full attention and have a dialogue with you once they have calmed down, its not pointless, its just a terrible idea and does not help the person in crisis at all, and being told its pointless will actually make things worse for that person (i know this from personal experience) in the confusion try telling that person its ok and be reassuring that they can take some time to calm down then we can have this discussion once you are ready to there is no rush or pressure that way

  • @keatonwright5764
    @keatonwright5764 Рік тому

    I wish the top row of books went from purple on the left to red and then orange and the bottom row was backwards so that it slinks along in a connected, correct rainbow. It should be purple then red then orange.

  • @grrrl.pusher
    @grrrl.pusher 2 роки тому +1

    do all autistic people experience both? or is it possible that an autistic person's main response is to either meltdown or shutdown?

    • @grrrl.pusher
      @grrrl.pusher Рік тому

      @Pateck Aaron trying to cure your son of autism is abusive.

  • @anjachan
    @anjachan Рік тому

    shutdown most of the time ... I think to often. Sometimes Meltdown. I just need alone time, some sleep.

  • @traingirlalkmaar
    @traingirlalkmaar Рік тому

    What is helpful for me with both is getting my teddy (k3 Hanne it is a Dutch singer teddy) and listening to music and be in a quiet room (at home in my bedroom) at work in the locker room be there for 5 or 10 minutes and it helps me to let go of my full head

  • @SouthAfricaKnowsBest
    @SouthAfricaKnowsBest 2 роки тому +1

    i love yur books.

  • @libranjeskatameesis6638
    @libranjeskatameesis6638 Рік тому

    thank you i was not familiar with this stage

  • @stormyco8446
    @stormyco8446 Рік тому

    I think I might have autism, I relate to almost every symptom except meltdowns. Though after finding out about shutdowns, I think I deffinetly have those. I tend to have nonverbal panic attacks, I wonder how many of those are actually just shutdowns

  • @osocardenas
    @osocardenas 2 роки тому

    Love your book color-arrange

  • @andreagrenade4211
    @andreagrenade4211 3 роки тому

    I just seen your video, my son is 4 I am waiting for a diagnosis. He often has meltdowns & I don't know how to deal with them so thank you for your tips. I will be trying them out.

    • @braynhilton5300
      @braynhilton5300 2 роки тому

      My son improved excellently from his autism spectrum disorder with assistance of herbal medicine from Solution Healing Home channel on UA-cam,, ua-cam.com/users/shortsh0YncUMye4c?feature=share

  • @Jksnxia
    @Jksnxia 3 роки тому +2

    I’m in a shutdown right now and literally fiddling with a pikachu plush as she says that a toy may help 🥰

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 3 роки тому +1

      Yes, petting my cat (preferably) or something else soft helps me too.

  • @gemmagriff8749
    @gemmagriff8749 Рік тому

    My little pet dog calmed me down ❤

  • @natwolfe7695
    @natwolfe7695 10 місяців тому

    Thank you

  • @amydee333ify
    @amydee333ify Рік тому +1

    I have a question. I was diagnosed with having ASD 2 years ago. I do have meltdowns. Although, for some reason when I'm around others, I won't meltdown. It's all going on inside. When this feeling happens and I'm on my own, I'll most likely scream, cry, swear. Something comes over me when I'm around people. I've been wondering recently if this is actually a meltdown I'm experiencing? Is it possible for someone to mask a meltdown? I know it sounds silly. I'm still trying to figure out my true self to the masked person. The interesting thing for me, is that when this happens and I don't visibly let anything out, I get terrible headaches, joint pains and hip aches. Do you think this sounds like a suppressed meltdown?... If there is such a thing? Thanks. Love your videos BTW!

    • @PookyH
      @PookyH  Рік тому

      Hi Amy, it’s always hard to comment on someone else’s experience but it sounds like you’ve read this right to me - it’s amazing what we can mask when we’ve spent a lecture learning to do so but it tends to take a massive emotional and physical toll on us..
      You might like my latest podcast episode which looks at how to avoid autistic burnout. These ideas might help you. They’ve certainly helped me: pookyh.buzzsprout.com/1183931/11808833

  • @MeredithDomzalski
    @MeredithDomzalski 8 місяців тому

    I need advice for adults

  • @aligemming3948
    @aligemming3948 3 роки тому +1

    Do you have any advice for someone who has been in shutdown for an extended period of time? My son is 15 and has been in shutdown for about a month now. He’s stopped talking to everyone and I’m not really sure how to help him

    • @queenvictoria2897
      @queenvictoria2897 2 роки тому

      My son is facing the same situation, please help

    • @DMMtoS
      @DMMtoS 2 роки тому

      Is it 'shutdown' or depression?

    • @DMMtoS
      @DMMtoS 2 роки тому

      I'll keep you both in my prayers. I am both autistic and have clinical depression, it is a heavy cross to bear sometimes.

    • @queenvictoria2897
      @queenvictoria2897 2 роки тому

      @@DMMtoS can u tell what is the frequency of shut down? I mean how often does it happen?

  • @jtd9426
    @jtd9426 5 років тому

    I just bury my head in my arms

  • @louise2091
    @louise2091 9 місяців тому

    Child or adult

  • @tessaarmstrong4770
    @tessaarmstrong4770 Рік тому

    Only in a young person or a child?

  • @IrishUnicornxx
    @IrishUnicornxx 2 роки тому

    do you have a book

  • @irenedavo3768
    @irenedavo3768 Рік тому

    Hello

  • @Xielisi
    @Xielisi Рік тому

    Вот бы еще понимать о чём она говорит (

  • @myworldautistic6839
    @myworldautistic6839 8 місяців тому

    When you make videos like this, please do NOT keep saying child or children, and young people. When you do this, it makes people believe that Autistic older adults do not exist, do not struggle with these same things, or do not need help. Thank you ❤

  • @Beanmachine91
    @Beanmachine91 22 дні тому

    this video will only convince me further that neurotypicals should be jailed!

  • @ReyBanYAHUAH
    @ReyBanYAHUAH 2 роки тому

    Always remember we must repent of our sins (sin is transgression The Law Of Yahuah The Father in Heaven. The Law are The Books: Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, & Deuteronomy). We must repent of our sins and Have Belief On Yahusha The Messiah. HE Died and Rose three days later so that we can be forgiven of our sins!
    Come to HIM🙂🙂

    • @ebenezerstooge1716
      @ebenezerstooge1716 2 роки тому

      ua-cam.com/video/8r-e2NDSTuE/v-deo.html
      Enough said.

    • @babenberg
      @babenberg Рік тому

      This is a 100% useless comment, that in addition is wrong in so many ways... specially for the fact that there is a lot of sensitive people watching videos like this, and might be drowned to think that their conditions are caused by any sort of spiritual force, and that there might be a cure.
      Look, there is no cure for autism, as there is no cure for non being autistic (sadly for non autistics).
      Stop spreading misleading concepts that mostly will harm more than help.

  • @queerjamie2608
    @queerjamie2608 Рік тому

    I would like to evho the comment below what happens in adults when i go from shutdown to a catatonic episode

    • @queerjamie2608
      @queerjamie2608 Рік тому

      @JulieHalo if your talking about a someone with that actual surname and is an actual Dr then fair enough, but if your talking about herbs and natural remedies that is beyond stupid autism is neurological meaning you can see the difference in brain response by comparing detailed brain exams it physical not mental you cant cure down syndrome another disorder caused genetically through an extra chromosome and effect the person physically as their brain is neurologically different. Dont listen to conspiracy theorists and other crazy scammers.

    • @queerjamie2608
      @queerjamie2608 Рік тому

      @JulieHalo Also the change your talking about is a normal part of autistic development we just develop later than normal

    • @queerjamie2608
      @queerjamie2608 Рік тому

      Your being scammed look there was a guy born with autism when he was little he used to through poo at the walls he is now doing TED talks about autism im telling you we suddenly change in jumps as we get older because you dont know this about autism your being scammed. As I have said look at neuroscience reseach into autistic brains we are physically different there is no cure no treatment and quite frankly im offended at the thought you would do this to your son I have autism/aspergers its infuriating people in america especially dont have basic knowledge of neuroscience @JulieHalo