worked at an online fashion magazine and yes, i can confirm this. there were times when the writers and editors sit during the proofreading sesh and go “i think that pic of them looks too nice, find one that’s more ‘casual’?” and then a pic of them in no makeup and a hoodie gets approved for the article discussing their controversies
I feel like fairytales have a lot to do with it too. Growing up, kids are taught that "beautiful princesses are good" and "ugly witches and step family are evil"
Psychologically, we are more drawn to things that look nice. We want to look nice, have nice things, be around nice looking people. Everything is about looking nice, and that mindset has creeped into how we view others.
Also, some serial killers do actually put effort into their appearance in order to manipulate people. And sadly, it does work. It’s not hard to find comments calling for a murderer to be released because he’s “too cute”.
remember when everyone was cancelling lizzo and people took it as an opportunity to make fun of her appearance and say “oh its fine cause shes a bad person!!”
Lizzo is a distended garbage bag and being bullied into pretending she's hashtag beautiful is more suffocating than any amount of whatevershaming you can think of.
@K.C-2049 Yeah, mock their sh!tty takes and terrible actions, but mocking their looks is basically telling all your friends that you will mock their looks when you have a fight. And you're hurting all the people who have a similar look as well.
Honestly the whole “unproblematic people age less” is so annoying because it just plays into ageism, and how you age has nothing to do with your appearance
Eh, there might actually be some biological reality to this though. Chronic stress and negativity can cause quicker onset of wrinkles, hair loss, and other non-flattering changes to one's appearance due to the negative effects that stress hormones have on a person over time. Problematic people are, deep down, miserable people, and thus it would make sense that a lifetime of being a piece of shit would make someone look less attractive. Whereas Oxytocin, the hormone that is released during bonding experiences, has known positive effects on the health your skin, hair, teeth, gums, etc.
@@badwolf3618Wth? Some of the kindest, most giving people I know are the most chronically stressed out! You can't be a caring person and not constantly be stressed out and feel defeated in this day and age with all the ish happening in the world. I suggest you volunteer at an animal rescue or with a group that works with abused children and tell me that these people are stressed and rapidly aging because they are negative, nasty people. The only type of people who don't have to worry or be stressed are narcissistic and privileged, and that's why they get to focus on their looks and appear more attractive.
The thing with "They are horrible so it's okay because they deserve it" Is that it's a quick and easy way to slide away into excusing your actions against literally anyone because it's not a measurable metric
I've seen online convos where this mindset is so prevalent. To be fair some of those forums are meant for judgement but for the situation not for physical attributes. I've seen people call it out too and it's always like a coin flip whether people call out the body shaming or whether people double down even when people explain how these insults aren't contained between people who dislike each other but have repercussions for anyone who hears/comes across it. It's frustrating.
this is how I feel when people misgender horrible people. they're like "oh that celebrity is a horrible person so it''s perfectly fine to use the wrong pronouns on them" and that's just not how it works. it sets an awful precedent and nothing good will come of it
@@s.tar.lin.gAbsolutely agree. I get so sick of that shit. Like, I don’t see anyone going around and misgender cis people because they’re bad people, but I see it all the time with people like Caitlyn Jenner. It’s almost like people are actively looking for an excuse to be transphobic. Absolutely wild how prevalent this is with supposed “allies”.
I think people use "well they did something bad so they deserve it" as a weak excuse to live out their 'mean girl' fantasies of insulting people's looks, whilst still pretending to be decent people.
It’s also a way to not face ugly parts about ourselves like the fact that we have biases based on the way people look. If you see someone who looks unappealing, like a burn victim, calling it “karma” allows you to avoid admitting that you have a prejudice and emotional reaction to how they look.
I honestly hate online discussions bc of this. Somehow almost every single clash of thought in any platform ends with a screenshot of the other’s profile pic, it doesn’t even matter if it’s an irl pic and that is honestly crazy to me because how does one having a pic of a flower or a pic with their grandma or an animated character proove your point 💀💀
there's a name for that, but i don't remember exactly what it is. When you try to use someone's personal details unrelated to the topic as a reason to not believe them or to invalidate them.
@@urubudopix976I would say that what you are describing is a logical fallacy called "ad hominem" but I don't like your username so I think you're actually wrong.
also this way of thinking can get really facist like « these peoples that match my beauty standards are inherently good and superior because of their appearance, and those that dont are inherently bad and inferior »
exactly and discrimination based on phenotype has happened several times before in human history yet people still can’t fathom how that logic is problematic
yeah. it's super frustrating when i try to explain this to people and they're like "the left will call anything they dislike facist!" and then... it's facism. either that, or it ties directly into it. not much i wanted to add, but it's super annoying.
It’s a continuation of the same social f@scism that existed pre internet where good looks=status. Back then there was no accountability so you didn’t have to be nice so stars were always elitist and nasty, it was always an aberration when they were nice. Paul Rudd was still around back then and he was one of the weird ones yea 😂 Except now they have to keep up appearances of morality, so they warped morality to be nothing but an aesthetic. Because that’s all f@scism is aesthetic for aesthetic purposes.
They use bullying against looks because it's the only way to hurt people cuz we care about looks more than morals and values. For example if someone called you racist it wouldn't hurt as much as someone calling you ugly.
This is a good point - I genuinely think a lot of people don’t actually care what someone looks like, they just want to hurt someone, and that’s like, a cheat code
It doesn't help that appearance is your first impression of anyone. The ego boost it gives to just dismiss everything because of outer beauty is absurd and we don't need that in our lives.
It's so crazy to have Jennifer Anniston as an example of aging badly because up until recently she was basically known for looking exactly the same for over 20 years. People are wild
as an extremely ugly person, ugly to the point of being able to actually even scientifically prove my own ugliness effortlessly.. I guess i just owe you a big thanks for bringing this up. Shaming a problematic figure for their appearance and not for their morals is like trying to kill a roach by blowing up the entire street. You're just hurting EVERYONE ELSE. And at the end, there's a chance you even missed the target and the roach is still alive
Aside from the point that attractiveness doesn't matter, I wouldn't put stock in any "scientific" tests that claim to measure beauty objectively. They're silly. It's true enough that certain combinations of features meet a societal standard considered beautiful to the point that it confers privilege and vice versa, but that standard shifts so much and has so much variation that it quickly becomes meaningless if you try to standardize it. I'm not saying you can't call yourself ugly, especially if it's not meant to be a self depricating insult. Go for it, I won't argue with your lived experience. But scientific tests to measure beauty are about as nebulous and nonsensical as a scientific test to measure whether or not art is good.
As someone in a wheelchair who doesn't consider himself at all attractive and has experienced the opposite of the Halo Effect (the Horn Effect), I'm so glad that a female content creator finally approached this in a non-toxic and non-condescending way. It seems like the "pill" people were starting to monopolize discourse in this area.
@@urubudopix976 thanks. I really appreciate that. 😅 I guess you could say that I'm not very "conventionally" attractive, then. Like I have things like rosacea and a lazy eye which I'm still somewhat insecure about and has been something that even family members have commented on negatively.
another thing I really hate with this is how hard they cherry-pick the photos. Like that photo of Jennifer Anniston is clearly an outlier but the photos they used of all the other celebrities are like red carpet photoshoot highlights.
A lot of it is specifically targeted at older women, by younger women. I think that's partly young women trying to tell themselves that they won't age "badly" (i.e look older than 25) just so long as they're nice people. They're in for a rude awakening.
That's why I tell younger women that the best way to age gracefully is to confront their own ageism while they're still young. Holding onto a lot of negative beliefs on how older women should look or act is a guaranteed path to self hatred once these women hit 30. It's hard to love yourself if you spend your whole life hating on others.
Something that I’ve seen said online that I generally agree with is that the first thought you have is what you were conditioned to think. An example being “that person’s outfit is so ugly”. But the second thought you have is how you really feel. “No, just because it’s not my taste doesn’t mean it’s ugly, and they seem happy, so who cares?” We grow up being taught to react certain ways or feel certain feelings, but that isn’t always the “correct” or kind way to react. Teaching ourselves how to redirect those knee-jerk reactions is hard! What you purposefully speak/put out into the world is what should reflect back on you and your morality, not the thoughts you have internally, I think.
I'd also argue that even if the first thing you think is your "real", innate opinion, it doesn't matter. What you do with the thought matters. Do you critique it and acknowledge that it's wrong? Do you verbalize it? Thoughts are just thoughts. They don't need to mean anything to anyone but you until you say them aloud, or allow them to influence you.
Correct and important. We often demonise people for the things programmed into them even when they've taught themselves to be better - and we demonise ourselves for this the most, especially when it comes to what we'd consider intrusive thoughts.
this is a great way to create a positive environment for yourself to grow. instead of beating yourself up for having the first thought, you can focus on the second one instead.
this is exactly why intrusive thoughts dont make u a bad person like if u have a random thougjt about like. ur dad is hot for example and ur immediate next reaction is “what the fuck ew why did i think that thats so gross” that proves that u dont actually think ur dad is hot which debunks the stupid assumption that a lot of ppl have that intrusive thoughts are that persons desires
One thing I hate is when you're friends with someone so they're really nice about your appearance and then when something happens and you split up suddenly you're the ugliest thing they've ever fucking seen
People do this in relationships too... It's called devaluation. It's a textbook tactic for people with narcissistic traits (I mean we all do to an extent. But definitely some more than others). Most will know it as sour grapes...
fr my friends do this and i mean sometimes i oin in but in my head i really wish they didnt do that cause someone who is good with those features can get hurt and idk how to handle it i ignore when they say stuff like that now or pretend to laugh
That is a terrifying and gross pattern, absolutely. Or when you're the punching bag in a friend group and your appearance is a frequent target. It often reveals a lot about someone's character, how quick they are to pick someone apart based on their looks. Good, genuine people will help you feel confident and good looking and will not suddenly start calling you ugly during a disagreement. Shitty, shallow people will entertain themselves by putting you down based entirely on appearance. All of the unhealthy friendships I've had involved me being called ugly over and over one way or another; every great relationship I've had (and have currently!) involved genuine compliments, reassurance, and confidence boosts.
@@mwyaskii mean you can also just say that you find it annoying or a bad trait. If they do this to other people they most likely do it to you too when you’re not around. I know cutting off friends can be difficult but generally more positive people will find you if you try to be the best version of yourself.
in my opinion this also gets into ableism territory. or at least dangerously close to the corollary of equating physical disability or deformity with immorality. obviously neither of these are new things and the trend of ugly = immoral and beautiful = moral, or the concept of disability being something that happens to people who "deserve" it is something deeply ingrained in our society and perhaps the human psyche in general. i like to think we're making progress, though.
I think there's something interesting going on here though, which is the way that disabled people often receive pity from others too, so disability is both perceived as well-earned karma and tragic injustice depending on whether you fit the right stereotypes about disability. For example, if you want to be treated better as a disabled person, consider being a child or having some savant ability.
@@yurisei6732 true. And pity ultimately never leads to any sustainable form of relationships (whether that romantic or friendly) for us. So either we can do no wrong, or when we do wrong we don't deserve forgiveness like able-bodied or conventionally attractive people. Both of these things are obviously very dehumanizing because they turn us into one dimensional caricatures and essentialize us.
oh it absolutely does. people will joke or even be serious about bad behavior -> illness. it might seem harmless at first but just think about it for a second.
@@madiv2098 yeah, and even if they are a little bit, I don't necessarily blame them. If you've been excluded from almost every social facet of human society since the beginning of civilization, I think you would be pretty bitter about some stuff too-I know I can be at times. That's not an excuse necessarily, but it is an explanation.
Even outside of the mortality argument, ppl say the most negative shit about attractiveness. When I had an art twitter account, a black artist I followed said something along the lines of "Yall need to let go of black skin tone with orange tints cuz that is straight up ugly". Seeing people I follow agreeing with her and retweeting that tweet just made me wanna delete my account because, as a real life black person, my skin IS orange tinted. These generalized comments about appearances are just so hurtful for no reason and I hope more people realize this
That's one of the unfortunate consequences of art becoming such an accessible thing - we all get to have tastes in art now, but it can be hard not to start thinking about those tastes in relation to real people too, and real people don't look like paintings and shouldn't and can't be judged on the same criteria. For example, I often say that American accents sound terrible, but when I actually hear one in person, it usually sounds fine. My distaste for it is only an artistic one and I need to be careful not to describe that distaste in a way that incorrectly applies to normal people.
It's always the ones who can't draw who has the most toxic, unsolicited, and patronizing opinion towards artists. You have all the rights in how you want to do your art even if it's something downright comical like making them all literally yellow like the simpsons Stay strong and block those kind of people before they can find you
The fact that there are people out there that still try to deny pretty privilege is WILD to me! But this is an issue that has gone back for centuries. Beauty is associated with angels, while ugliness demons. For example some girls call guys creeps for fairly normal awkward behaviour, but because the guy is less attractive, the behaviour is magically made worse somehow. Or someone is arrested, but their picture gets on the internet and it turns out they're hot. People start campaigning to get them out of trouble. Man or woman, the hotter you are the more you get away with
Agreed. I’ve benefited by that, I am quite tall and I’m athletic. I don’t like that. I don’t like this fact of “denying pretty privilege” that you point out. My whole career I’ve worked to get folks that aren’t traditionally in my line of work into it. The reality is pretty privilege is absolutely a factor in who gets hired. Personally, I did not consider appearance in my hiring decisions, but I am fairly certain some folks did.
Calling Miley Cyrus “non problematic” made my bones creek. 10 years ago I was a teenager during her Bangerz era. Her performance with Robin Thicke set the Internet ablaze
good looking ≠ good person is such a bad presumption it gets a lot of ppl to fall into this kind of trap that if you're inherently good looking you're like a saint
Or for some who think they're mean or players the population of this particular thought process is low but still exists, Can we just stop tying people's morality with their appearance at all 😭😭
I look at people neutrally until I know more about them and their character, and then I decide how I perceive them. For instance, I could know a girl who is considered 'unattractive' by societal standards, but because I know what a kind, caring person she is, she's is gorgeous to me. On the other side, there could be a very conventionally attractive girl who is very mean to me and the people I care about, and I would see her as ugly. In my opinion, your character defines your beauty. Your beauty does not define your character.
This is actually a very normal thing and it's a big part of what drives the effect described in the video - it's the kernel of truth that makes people not immediately notice that judging people's morality by their appearance is stupid. The fact that we perceive bad people as less physically attractive than they "objectively" are is what makes us think that appearance is tied to morality and assume that people who are physically less attractive are also less moral. For random example using the nonsense number system, say you see Taylor Swift as a 6. If it came out that she was a terrible person, you might start perceiving her as a 4, and then you'd start associating being a 4 with being terrible. This has unfortunate consequences for people whom you naturally perceive as a 4.
I’m not even sure why beauty needs to be brought up in the first place though. Like, I’ve definitely judged people’s attractiveness based on their morals too, but how I subjectively rate someone’s attractiveness is completely irrelevant if I’m criticizing their character anyway. When we make fun of a bad person’s looks, we’re not really getting to the root of the problem. If the problem is the person’s _behavior,_ their behaviour should be the biggest concern, not their looks.
I haven't watched the video fully yet, so I don't know if you mentioned this, but something that feels especially gross about this is that people who are under a lot of stress and/or have suffered from a lot of trauma in their lives age faster, especially those who can't afford all the beauty hacks and healthy food and creams etc etc etc.
Yess I think this point is commonly overlooked, things like dr-gs and alcohol and stress make you “age” visibly more which is directly correlated to why people with chronic illnesses, addictions, and poorer people often look older than their age. life is hard and it can show on your skin, and it is definitiely not a coincidence that most cultures associate poor/ill = ugly. the elite have made the culture that way.
The reverse can also happen with young children not being able to eat enough and therefore not being able to grow compared to others their age who eat well. They usually can end up looking younger than their actual age because of their size and how skinny they are.
This is a topic I could say so much about oml this was was refreshing to watch 😭 I feel like so often people are okay with saying things that are basically discriminatory when the person they’re referring to is ‘bad’. That doesn’t change the meaning of what they say. It’s the same attitude of those people who are horribly against a minority but has like one friend who they view as an ‘exception’ because that friend conforms to their standards.
Like you hate this guy because he’s racist, not because he’s fat. Talk about the bad things he’s done instead of acting like you should dislike him for another reason (example)
right like even not making fun of their looks people seem to think it's ok to misgender people or be sexist or something when they don't like the person. it just seems like some people don't actually believe in trans rights or gender equality when they're completely willing to give it all up just because the person they're talking about is a bad person or because they disagree about something. it doesn't hurt the target as much as it hurts other members of the marginalized group tbh
@@existential_horror5045omggg I’m glad you brought that up. It reminded me of the time I saw people talking about an autistic creator on TikTok who had done some problematic things, (although I don’t really remember what exactly, because this happened about a year or two ago,) and people used it as an excuse to mock their autistic traits. It was really gross seeing people doing that while no one said a word about it. Like, mock their crappy behavior that they have control over, not the disability they were born with
Told a guy he was right-wing and he said I needed to get some b*tches because my pfp on insta is me with my cat. Does he not know how much women like single cat dads, or
I have acne and it makes me so uncomfortable when people are treating acne as some sort of punishment when I’m just like this because of a combination of genetics and that I have severe sensory issues with a lot of lotions… when I hear people say that other people look like me as some sort of punishment for being bad it really hurts because I try to be the best person I can… This is the other way around but I think it’s the extension of the same bias… I have a close friend who is fat(I know in general fatphobia is worse than what I experience for my face but they both suck and sometimes we talk about our experiences being treated badly for our appearance and we support each other) and we had a conversation recently where we were talking about people assuming we did something wrong and it’s our fault for how we look and making assumptions on our lives and moral fiber based on it without even knowing us… like that was less explicitly about actual morality and more about us apparently being assumed to be like that due to not trying hard enough to fit the beauty standard and THAT being equated to being morally bad somehow which is kind of the opposite direction and a backwards extension of this same bias… it always seems so illogical and horrible to me to act like people’s appearance (which doesn’t impact anyone else but themselves, and in the case of both acne and weight actually has a wide range factors many of which are to varying extents not in their control) is somehow a sign of morality or lack thereof when the two are completely unconnected
I hate these posts bc all they do is remind me I'm probably not gonna "age well" bc i live in constant stress (mental illnesses suck) and struggle to live a healthy life Glad to see someone making a video about this!
One thing that annoys me is when someone is caught in a controversy and suddenly everyone jump on them to call them ugly and repulsive like... you were acting from the beginning then?? You didnt even find them pretty from the beginning??
I don’t think that’s completely true. I wouldn’t say it’s all an act I think people can change their views on people depending on context. I do think that part of being social is a little acting but I don’t think everyone is massively pretending I think that people change there views of you according to information they have. If you are proven to be a bad person why would someone want it be around you. It’s not a act to adjust to new info
It’s just someone else’s perception of you which is different that what you actually do. Also try not let other people dictate your morality because that’s a huge trap
People can change their minds about things and you won’t know why but if you have a solid moral code then you can know if your moral or not without someone else having to tell you
another problem with the aging thing is that it can be affected by external factors like illnesses or the treatments for said illnesses, like chemo. and also not everyone has access to the resources a lot of the celebrities who ‘aged well’ do (that’s not quite the same thing, but on a similar topic)
This factors in how pretty privilege allows people to get away with crimes because they're conventionally attractive. Like I've literally seen people defended murderers because they were 'pretty'
I really feel like this is a big really why the Fat Acceptance Movement gained such momentum. When I was a kid, being fat wasn't just bad for you, but it was always linked to being a worse person
Same thing with movies. Pre-Melissa McCarthy, fat women were rarely ever seen in big roles. I mean, we did have Precious and Phat Girlz(?) but even then those aren't even as big.
@@roxassora2706 Do those count? I mean, especially in Precious, her weight is not only shown to be a bad thing, but it's meant to convey how she isn't taking care of herself. Which is fine, except for that, yeah, we don't see enough just normal fat people. Being fat has to be tied with a lesson
It started off with just asking that fat people not be bullied for their appearance, which is fine. But now it's lost the plot. It's degenerated into actively glamorising and promoting fatness, to the point where they claim being morbidly obese is totally healthy, which is dangerous nonsense. And just look at the downright hate ex 'fat activists' get when they DARE to drop some weight and look after themselves.
It still is, fat characters are either stupid and jolly, lazy and jolly (and stupid), stupid and mean, or evil (and also stupid). It's rare that a fat character gets to just be a character without their body being significant.
My grandma is a wrinkly little raisin of a woman, practically the opposite of aging "well". She donates regularly to the local humane society, cares for her dogs like they're her children, and is one of the sweetest people I know. The idea that appearance has anything to do with morality is insane to me.
This whole topic reminds me of people intentionally misgendering folks who they deem as bad people, as though it's something you have to earn, inadvertently sending the message to other trans or NB people that if they mess up in some way, then their identity is no longer valid or will be used as a way to attack them. You really have to consider what basic levels of respect & considerations *everyone* deserves, because once we start picking and choosing who deserves it or not things get kinda... problematic lol
I always think of that one Roald Dahl page where it’s like “if a person is bad, it doesn’t matter how beautiful they are, the ugly within will always show. and a good, kind person, no matter how ugly they are, will always look beautiful” or however it goes. And not because I agree with it; it infuriates me because people always use it as validation to shit on people’s appearances if they’re “bad”. There is *literally* zero correlation between how someone looks and their personality or actions.
Yeah but the point of that paragraph is that if youre kind youll be attractive even if youre ugly. And pretty people will be offputting if theyre dicks.
I feel like that quote has such good intentions, but of course, people twist it. "Actions matter, appearance doesn't " is a very good thing to believe.
the hatred of fat people in matilda made me feel terrible about myself when i was a chubby kid, so when i see that quote i get annoyed at dahl all over again
"If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until it gets so ugly you can hardly bear to look at it. A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely." I feel like people who think that pretty people must be good people have internalised the idea of the first paragraph whether they've ever read The Witches or not (the idea has existed and been prevalent since forever). When you take the first paragraph as literal (that their face literally changes to become ugly because they have "ugly thoughts"), then it reinforces the problems that Emily talks about here. If you take it figuratively, it's saying that a person who is consistently an immoral and reprehensible POS will become so ugly to you that you can hardly bear to look at them. Which is true. I can't look at people who have done horrible things even if there is nothing 'objectively' 'wrong' with their face. The rest of the page says that a person's kindness takes precedence over how aesthetically pleasing they are, and that their kindness makes them loveable and beautiful people even if they have an 'objectively' undesirable appearance. This should nullify the first 'idea' completely--i.e. that you can tell if someone is good because of how they look physically, but like beep3242 says, people twist it. I think I literally just said what they said but in way more words... shit.
@@paperlacejane exactly! It seems like another case of a quote being taken out of context so much that it gets lost in translation. “Blood is thicker than water,” “jack of all trades, master of none,” are just a few other examples. It’s crazy to see how people would take Roald Dahl’s message as “we should start bullying bad people for their appearances now.”
I can't believe people actually think that. i always thought people who said that were just joking or complimenting that person for having no scandals. why are people this stupid??
i legit hate the halo effect sm. whenever i did something that my (paternal) grandmother didn't like, she would just straight up call me ugly. sometimes she would tack on that "its my personality. a pretty girl like me shouldn't do something so ugly and rotten". that could just be her internalized misogyny showing bc another time when i was 6, i was walking into her living room and she stopped me and said "whats wrong with your face? are you not happy to be here? why do you look so mad?" i just have rbf :/, and i told her that and then she said (I KID YOU NOT) "you should smile more, you look rotten and gross when you dont" bruh :/
No bc I came across a thread of a picture of DJ Khaled like twenty years ago with his shirt off DJing and half the comments were insulting his appearance and fat-shaming him. Insulting someone’s work or their personality is one thing, but tying that into their physical appearance or weight and insulting that too is not only devaluing to the argument about the person themselves but also sends a message to other people that look like him but are not bad people that they are worthless and slobby bc of their appearance. It’s awful to see so many people doing that.
This reminds me of a Tumblr post I saw once with a picture of Nicki Minaj with the Olsen twins, and the caption was making fun of how the twins are younger than Nicki yet look older, and they finished it out with "white people age like onions (or milk or smth like that)" It just left a bad taste in my mouth because like, you can celebrate one person/group without tearing someone else down for something as superficial as what their face looks like. Not to mention the Olsen twins have probably been hearing mean comments about their appearances since they were literally babies...it was just so unnecessarily cruel. It was clear the poster didn't really care about lifting up Nicki Minaj and other black women, or if they did care it was still secondary to them just wanting to dunk on the Olsen twins for having plastic surgery or whatever.
Those kind of posts are so prevalent in 2013 tumblr. That's why i stopped following some black tumblr accounts bc all they do is mock other people in order to lift up black people
this is actually SUCH an interesting topic, gonna go get a snack and then watch this video, remember im obsessed with your content, then watch all your other videos
it's also super interesting how this topic links to religious shame, the impacts of poverty, hate toward minorities, eugenics, policing women's aging, how children can be set up for success by their caretakers... it's impossible to not be affected by it in some way.
i like that you mentioned that "its never okay to go after someone based on physical appearance- but will i admit that i have gone to that place in my head when someone is disrespecting me where i verbally attack that person calling them a disgusting troll who looks like a blender full of dump sludge. the difference is im not saying that out loud to the person…. in examples of someone being bigoted you do wanna see that person taken down a notch with a low blow" because it felt super relatable in this specific instance in my life. i re-came out (first when i was a kid) as trans my senior year, and a friend i made in 10th grade said to me about 3-4 years after graduation "i'll just always remember you as -Deadname- though" and i also went straight to the poor taste imaged based come-back in my head "yeah and ill always remember you 30 pounds lighter than current day TF" like obviously thats wrong and not actually how i felt- i still didnt vocalize that to person- but when im being told by a "friend" that they uphold some version of me that they didnt even know me well enough to have a thumb in that pie- my brains gonna get a little nastyTM for a second
DUDE NO WAY IM FIRST ILY EMILY IVE BEEN WATCHING FOR LIKE A YEAR AND A HALF AND U CONTINUE TO IMPRESS ME!!!! THANK YOU FOR CONSTANT QUALITY UPLOADS IM SO EXCITED TO WATCH
Tysm for this. I'm 21 and getting my first wrinkles and I've always been upset about this, but esp after i got my first wrinkle i have been in despair bc i know aging "gracefully" is being equated to goodness
Solidarity. My hairline stared receding when I was 18, forcing me to go completely bald at 23. The universe wasn’t balancing my Twitter account it was just genetics
@@TheJadedJames you must be lying, it's cause you used "gay" as an insult when you were an edgy 13-year old!!1! only bad people age * insert angry emoji*
The ageing determines morality thing really gets to me, especially when aging is actually often dependent on factors like stress/work, access to healthcare/resources, and genetics, essentially tying morality to...being born privileged enough and "genetically correct," things we should be steering far away from...
It’s such a dumb idea because I aged 5 years in one year because I was in an abusive relationship and that most definitely wasn’t me that was the problematic one
Same problem with people assuming people in certain jobs can't do anything bad... as far as I'm concerned, everyone's individual and anyone can be heinous. I don't care what you look like or what you do, you can prove yourself one way or the other just like the rest of the world.
Also on the flip side there’s literal murderers who people sre obsessed about because theyre so conveniently attractive. Saying things like “id be happy if he chose to kill me!” Or “someone needs to give him a modeling contract asap instead of letting that beautiful face rot in prison”. There’s also people who support]ed and were fans of certain people until something shady about their past comes to light. Then these fans are like “i always knew he was hiding something. I always got such bad vibes and now i know why” like b*tch please you were literally their biggest fan until those allegation came out 5 seconds ago”
Oh damn. My smile is also miles of gums. And I also once saw someone comment negatively about it in general. How miserable has someone's life to be to insult a look of genuine happiness and joy smh
Saw this happened irl. Was sitting in my class and this girl was called up to explain her groups research. Girl for no reason gave horrible attitude to my very kind professor and was just so nasty in tone and body language. Thing is though that the group of girls at my table started to talk shit about her appearance and saying how she thinks she’s so hot when she really ugly. I agree her personality is nasty but she’s a beautiful girl still. Has a slim figure that I’m jealous of and big blue eyes. It’s just crazy how quick people go into insulting problematic people over looks even when they’re average standard
This reminds me of how uncomfortable the body shaming of Trump I saw made me. Like, there is a lot to mock about that man, but his physical shape is pretty unremarkable for guys in their 60s and 70s. He just kinda looks like a lot of guys his age, and some of them are absolutely lovely people. They don't deserve to be collateral damage in people's mockery him. If you're going to go after him go after his actions, because the people that have THAT in common with him, they do deserve it.
Also, I noticed ill-behaved men online will get made fun of for being bald, as if it's punishment for them being a bad person. It really makes me sad how often I see people/women making fun of balding men, since it's not something they can control. Good men bald too 😭 my husband is an amazing person and happened to go bald at 17. It's a big insecurity for most men to become bald, and it is for my husband. For example Drew Afualo, who has great clap backs to shitty rude comments from men, but then will make fun of them for being bald. Makes me sad how much people will make fun of people's appearances just because they're a bad person.
"Good looking and charasmatic? Probably a good man". Said the citizen about the newly-elected leader of his country. That same leader would later become the most oppressive dictator ever seen. And that citizen would not make it to the end of the week.
15:15 I think it’s natural to have negative/unkind thoughts sometimes, especially when something/someone is pissing you off lol. but yeah, it’s how you engage with or express them that has the potential to be a problem. Thinking something mean but not telling anyone or acting on it is not a problem imo! (only engaging in good faith discourse on this lol) alsoo thank u for the parade coupon, love them 🙏
1:00 I think it's sad in particular that 'problematic' has become part of binary morality discussions, when I actually think it's a very good word to show the complexity of things, you can like someone or something, but think they/it have elements that well, cause problems, and your able to acknowledge them alongside other qualities, for things to be problematic (unequivocally bad) or not problematic (unequivocally good) seems to remove one of the key uses of the word of enabling nuanced discussions of morality. And also judging people based on looks is obviously wrong no matter the reason, because, obviously
Exactly! Nowadays problematic is just “I don’t agree with literally everything this person has ever said or done”. “Unproblematic” in that sense is not the way to live, you’d be limiting yourself to silence in fear of offending someone
Agreed. As quickly as "problematic" came to mean "bad", it was originally a pretty good term, saying "it seems like there are potentially some problems here" rather than toss the whole thing. I never really liked the binary aspect of Woke either; as though you're just fully awake and aware of all these social issues, or entirely asleep and obvious. Someone who might be really informed about one kind of oppression could have blind spots about others but still be identified as Woke either by themselves or others, whether it's a compliment or criticism
@@asafoetidajones8181 it is one of the very few areas where I somewhat agree with conservatives, unlike lots of them I don't think people have the right to do whatever they want and just say 'it was a joke' or 'stop being offended' and this vice signalling they do when they try to prove how offensive they are is just childish, but I do agree that people can make mistakes and that, while people should be criticised for them, it should be constructive criticism and, provided the person makes efforts to do the right thing most of the time, and they shouldn't have to have the mistakes define them forever
@@Antipaxos_Nadja123 agreed. Especially younger people. I can't imagine being publicly characterized by things I did or said as a teen, before smartphones and social media were a thing. It's an unreasonable standard to hold people to.
This but also with "ugly" filters. Like what if I looked like that or had similar features. I see people often using them to boost their own confidence.. like "well I could look like this" probably not thinking about people that might
I see this a lot with the gen z kids. They think im old at 30 when they are pretty close to my age. They neglect the fact that they are aging as well. I had similar comments from 17 year olds when i was 22. Sometimes you just have to let time run its course, hopefully eventually theyll understand
there are memes that i believe are called wojak memes wherein there are attractive people are 'morally right' and the people in the wrong are the hysterical, conventionally unattractive people are do not agree with their views. just thought it was relevant here too.
i feel it's also important to point out that classism plays a HUGE role in this specific topic. The individual standards for what is considered beautiful keep changing over the centuries, but always are dictated by people that have wealth and power, aka the people that can afford the lifestyles, products, and treatments that help to achieve and maintain the ideal look. I promise you that just about any of these celebrities that still look the same or else "aged like wine" have almost certainly had work done and rarely actually just look like that. Morality has nothing to do with it.
every time someone covers a twitter issue they just end up explaining fundamental human ethics and basic common sense because twitter just cant seem to grasp moral concepts we were taught in kindergarten. Then they say its because twitter is an app for “free speech” when the comment in question is just calling someone a beluga whale for streaming a selena gomez song
Ok I know that this is not the point of the video at all, but I was GENUINELY shocked when you were talking about your insecurities. Like, what you were pointing out had not once crossed my mind. I think when we look at ourselves every day, we pick apart every feature that people wouldn't even register unless they were specifically looking for it. When I see your videos (and I have watched quite a few) I genuinely just think that you are so beautiful, and witty, and intelligent, and I think your smile is lovely. I know this isn't going to instantly erase your insecurities (if you even read this lol), but it always helps me to hear another perspective :) Keep making fantastic videos!!!!!
Why are they comparing photos of 17yo Miley Cyrus to her 30yo self ?? Ofc she hasn't changed that much, she's not even aged yet, she's still pretty young!! ...
The internet if full of bad takes sometimes. The truth is strong people are gonna look rough cus they went through it, real age is real wisdom, there’s no way to fake it. Good on you for sharing your thoughts
I genuinely love your videos so much ugh, it’s just the way you word things and the amazing sense of humor. Truly no other youtuber can compare i’m sorry
Fun fact: this way of thinking actually starts with the ancient greeks, whose ideal of perfection was the καλοκαγαθία, meaning beautiful and good, because they thought that the body reflected if the soul was virtuous or not
Oh yeah we do this a lot in korean, too I don't know how it nowadays, but I grew up a LOT hearing adults talk about in-sang - basically the way you look+the vibe you give off. If you have good in-sang, then it's just assumed you're an overall good person. God forbid someone's good at faking shit or even, I don't know, a good looking person is a piece of shit. Which is funny cause outside of the korean side of my life, my other friends were usually the opposite, like "oh if you're that good looking, you're probably an asshole"
media writers definitely very intentionally use unflattering pictures when a celebrity is in a controversy
Yeah, remember amber heard?
True! That's a good point
@@bingbong_luverthis
@@bingbong_luverWhat the world did to Amber Heard is unforgivable. The smear campaigns on Twitter are disturbing enough.
worked at an online fashion magazine and yes, i can confirm this. there were times when the writers and editors sit during the proofreading sesh and go “i think that pic of them looks too nice, find one that’s more ‘casual’?” and then a pic of them in no makeup and a hoodie gets approved for the article discussing their controversies
I feel like fairytales have a lot to do with it too. Growing up, kids are taught that "beautiful princesses are good" and "ugly witches and step family are evil"
holy fuck dude this is it! this is where is literally all starts!
And then people with visible disabilities are cast in films as baddies and, surprise surprise, get harassed in real life.
This!! this is also why we can't have attractive villains without people trying to romantisize their actions and stuff
Frfr
@@YoiyoneneYeah the whole anime fandom is basically down bad for the villains ignoring all the red flags.
I will never understand why people assume that good looking people have good morals.
People thought Ted Bundy was a good looking man, shows how little that means.
@@AshChiCupcak smh at those people
Usually you can tell who someone is by their eyes
There are innocent eyes and evil eyes but they can also be deceiving
Psychologically, we are more drawn to things that look nice. We want to look nice, have nice things, be around nice looking people. Everything is about looking nice, and that mindset has creeped into how we view others.
@@crow_moriondo Fair point
Also, some serial killers do actually put effort into their appearance in order to manipulate people. And sadly, it does work. It’s not hard to find comments calling for a murderer to be released because he’s “too cute”.
Right like he's cute so MURDER IS OKAY??? 😳
Yeah, you hear this from their interviews. They try and appear charming and normal
@@irenifilmsExactly. I'm sexually frustrated, but even then that's weird.
this reminds me of when a murderer got arrested and because he was good looking ppl started a hash tag saying he should be set free....
@@z3onixi remember that. what was his name again? wasnt he like barely 20 too?
It's unfortunate to live in a society where we can't see beyond the skin.
IKR!!!
Couldn't agree more!
real
real
Even those who criticize the system do the same. Who doesn't care about looks? Don't be hypocrites. We all do.
remember when everyone was cancelling lizzo and people took it as an opportunity to make fun of her appearance and say “oh its fine cause shes a bad person!!”
they do this all the time and it makes it obvious they don't care about the issue. Just wanted an excuse to shit on the person's appearance
@@regularpotato EXACTLY
this happened with dream and made me feel awful about my jawline lmao
Lizzo is a distended garbage bag and being bullied into pretending she's hashtag beautiful is more suffocating than any amount of whatevershaming you can think of.
@K.C-2049 Yeah, mock their sh!tty takes and terrible actions, but mocking their looks is basically telling all your friends that you will mock their looks when you have a fight. And you're hurting all the people who have a similar look as well.
i've seen people literally excuse bigotry /other awful actions because the person who said it was hot...that's really stupid imo
Said the person who’s not hot ;)
That's actually pretty common
@@shibasurfingyou’re wrong, they are so hot
@@Krog517 aww thanks :)
@@shibasurfing fair enough lol i'm ugly so now i will become a little witch in a hut /j
Honestly the whole “unproblematic people age less” is so annoying because it just plays into ageism, and how you age has nothing to do with your appearance
Eh, there might actually be some biological reality to this though. Chronic stress and negativity can cause quicker onset of wrinkles, hair loss, and other non-flattering changes to one's appearance due to the negative effects that stress hormones have on a person over time. Problematic people are, deep down, miserable people, and thus it would make sense that a lifetime of being a piece of shit would make someone look less attractive.
Whereas Oxytocin, the hormone that is released during bonding experiences, has known positive effects on the health your skin, hair, teeth, gums, etc.
@@badwolf3618okay? There’s still just people with anxiety disorders and depression, unhappy doesn’t mean you’re a bad person
@@Hi-en7xxI’d agreed, and some people are lucky with genetics.
@@badwolf3618 You're saying that privileged people age better not that unproblematic people age better.
@@badwolf3618Wth? Some of the kindest, most giving people I know are the most chronically stressed out! You can't be a caring person and not constantly be stressed out and feel defeated in this day and age with all the ish happening in the world. I suggest you volunteer at an animal rescue or with a group that works with abused children and tell me that these people are stressed and rapidly aging because they are negative, nasty people. The only type of people who don't have to worry or be stressed are narcissistic and privileged, and that's why they get to focus on their looks and appear more attractive.
Equating morality with physical attraction? The Victorian Era would love to know your location
literally physiognomy
Goes all the way back to Ancient Greece
Honestly! We all collectively need to re-read The Picture of Dorian Gray cos what is this 😅
Oscar Wilde is rolling in his grave smh
francis galton is cackling in his grave
The thing with "They are horrible so it's okay because they deserve it" Is that it's a quick and easy way to slide away into excusing your actions against literally anyone because it's not a measurable metric
Plus, there is so much that just no one deserves
I've seen online convos where this mindset is so prevalent. To be fair some of those forums are meant for judgement but for the situation not for physical attributes. I've seen people call it out too and it's always like a coin flip whether people call out the body shaming or whether people double down even when people explain how these insults aren't contained between people who dislike each other but have repercussions for anyone who hears/comes across it. It's frustrating.
this is how I feel when people misgender horrible people. they're like "oh that celebrity is a horrible person so it''s perfectly fine to use the wrong pronouns on them"
and that's just not how it works. it sets an awful precedent and nothing good will come of it
@@s.tar.lin.gAbsolutely agree. I get so sick of that shit. Like, I don’t see anyone going around and misgender cis people because they’re bad people, but I see it all the time with people like Caitlyn Jenner. It’s almost like people are actively looking for an excuse to be transphobic. Absolutely wild how prevalent this is with supposed “allies”.
Yeah, plus you hurt all the people with similar features/characteristics with a bodyshaming comment, you hurt innocent people in the crossfire.
I think people use "well they did something bad so they deserve it" as a weak excuse to live out their 'mean girl' fantasies of insulting people's looks, whilst still pretending to be decent people.
This is it lol
I had a friend who treat me that way. Now I have no friends
It’s also a way to not face ugly parts about ourselves like the fact that we have biases based on the way people look. If you see someone who looks unappealing, like a burn victim, calling it “karma” allows you to avoid admitting that you have a prejudice and emotional reaction to how they look.
Good point
ive thought ab that but never knew how to phrase it u defined that so well
I honestly hate online discussions bc of this. Somehow almost every single clash of thought in any platform ends with a screenshot of the other’s profile pic, it doesn’t even matter if it’s an irl pic and that is honestly crazy to me because how does one having a pic of a flower or a pic with their grandma or an animated character proove your point 💀💀
its so insane. I wonder if it is because, the attacker(strong word?) bases their entire life and morality on their online presence
there's a name for that, but i don't remember exactly what it is. When you try to use someone's personal details unrelated to the topic as a reason to not believe them or to invalidate them.
@@urubudopix976I would say that what you are describing is a logical fallacy called "ad hominem" but I don't like your username so I think you're actually wrong.
@@nicjoy4407 😂😂 good play on words
See also "anime profile pic therefore opinion invalid".
also this way of thinking can get really facist like « these peoples that match my beauty standards are inherently good and superior because of their appearance, and those that dont are inherently bad and inferior »
exactly and discrimination based on phenotype has happened several times before in human history yet people still can’t fathom how that logic is problematic
yeah. it's super frustrating when i try to explain this to people and they're like "the left will call anything they dislike facist!" and then... it's facism. either that, or it ties directly into it. not much i wanted to add, but it's super annoying.
It’s a continuation of the same social f@scism that existed pre internet where good looks=status. Back then there was no accountability so you didn’t have to be nice so stars were always elitist and nasty, it was always an aberration when they were nice. Paul Rudd was still around back then and he was one of the weird ones yea 😂 Except now they have to keep up appearances of morality, so they warped morality to be nothing but an aesthetic. Because that’s all f@scism is aesthetic for aesthetic purposes.
Ww2
this ideal literally started some of the holocausts beliefs
They use bullying against looks because it's the only way to hurt people cuz we care about looks more than morals and values. For example if someone called you racist it wouldn't hurt as much as someone calling you ugly.
This is a good point - I genuinely think a lot of people don’t actually care what someone looks like, they just want to hurt someone, and that’s like, a cheat code
@@xafilmbyx EXACTLYYY
It doesn't help that appearance is your first impression of anyone. The ego boost it gives to just dismiss everything because of outer beauty is absurd and we don't need that in our lives.
True but tbh I'd rather be called ugly.
@@barbecuedsimsbabysame lol
It's so crazy to have Jennifer Anniston as an example of aging badly because up until recently she was basically known for looking exactly the same for over 20 years. People are wild
as an extremely ugly person, ugly to the point of being able to actually even scientifically prove my own ugliness effortlessly.. I guess i just owe you a big thanks for bringing this up. Shaming a problematic figure for their appearance and not for their morals is like trying to kill a roach by blowing up the entire street. You're just hurting EVERYONE ELSE. And at the end, there's a chance you even missed the target and the roach is still alive
I’m sure you can’t be that ugly. Don’t be so hard on yourself 😢
I refuse to believe you're that ugly, but that description made me laugh
Aside from the point that attractiveness doesn't matter, I wouldn't put stock in any "scientific" tests that claim to measure beauty objectively. They're silly. It's true enough that certain combinations of features meet a societal standard considered beautiful to the point that it confers privilege and vice versa, but that standard shifts so much and has so much variation that it quickly becomes meaningless if you try to standardize it.
I'm not saying you can't call yourself ugly, especially if it's not meant to be a self depricating insult. Go for it, I won't argue with your lived experience. But scientific tests to measure beauty are about as nebulous and nonsensical as a scientific test to measure whether or not art is good.
genuinely curious, how are you scientifically verifying your ugliness??
@@beep3242 Plus, such tests are usually founded in mountains of racist ideals
As someone in a wheelchair who doesn't consider himself at all attractive and has experienced the opposite of the Halo Effect (the Horn Effect), I'm so glad that a female content creator finally approached this in a non-toxic and non-condescending way. It seems like the "pill" people were starting to monopolize discourse in this area.
well if you allow me to say this, i looked at your profile and i don't think you're ugly at all my dude. Very handsome fella 🍷🗿
@@urubudopix976 thanks. I really appreciate that. 😅 I guess you could say that I'm not very "conventionally" attractive, then. Like I have things like rosacea and a lazy eye which I'm still somewhat insecure about and has been something that even family members have commented on negatively.
Approved 🦸@@urubudopix976
Subscribed to you because I looked at your channel and you seem extremely interesting and cultured
@@feltfrog thanks. There's definitely some cringe on there, but thankfully I move past it. Appreciate your subscription immensely.
some of these people really need to read the picture of dorian grey... just because ur beautiful doesnt mean ur a good person istg
I mean, yeah. You can learn a lot from Oscar Wilde too. He was relatively attractive, but not the greatest guy.
Pretty sure we have a copy at my cottage, I'll check it out.
another thing I really hate with this is how hard they cherry-pick the photos. Like that photo of Jennifer Anniston is clearly an outlier but the photos they used of all the other celebrities are like red carpet photoshoot highlights.
its definetly cherrypicked.
True, but she's also 55. Women aren't allowed to age for some reason.
A lot of it is specifically targeted at older women, by younger women. I think that's partly young women trying to tell themselves that they won't age "badly" (i.e look older than 25) just so long as they're nice people. They're in for a rude awakening.
That's why I tell younger women that the best way to age gracefully is to confront their own ageism while they're still young. Holding onto a lot of negative beliefs on how older women should look or act is a guaranteed path to self hatred once these women hit 30. It's hard to love yourself if you spend your whole life hating on others.
the part in the skit where the character said she slapped a blind elderly woman in the face and woke up with a wrinkle 😭😭😭😭
Something that I’ve seen said online that I generally agree with is that the first thought you have is what you were conditioned to think. An example being “that person’s outfit is so ugly”. But the second thought you have is how you really feel. “No, just because it’s not my taste doesn’t mean it’s ugly, and they seem happy, so who cares?”
We grow up being taught to react certain ways or feel certain feelings, but that isn’t always the “correct” or kind way to react. Teaching ourselves how to redirect those knee-jerk reactions is hard! What you purposefully speak/put out into the world is what should reflect back on you and your morality, not the thoughts you have internally, I think.
I'd also argue that even if the first thing you think is your "real", innate opinion, it doesn't matter. What you do with the thought matters. Do you critique it and acknowledge that it's wrong? Do you verbalize it?
Thoughts are just thoughts. They don't need to mean anything to anyone but you until you say them aloud, or allow them to influence you.
Correct and important. We often demonise people for the things programmed into them even when they've taught themselves to be better - and we demonise ourselves for this the most, especially when it comes to what we'd consider intrusive thoughts.
I heard that quote too and i think about it often. The more we correct those reactions the more it trains us out of it.
this is a great way to create a positive environment for yourself to grow. instead of beating yourself up for having the first thought, you can focus on the second one instead.
this is exactly why intrusive thoughts dont make u a bad person like if u have a random thougjt about like. ur dad is hot for example and ur immediate next reaction is “what the fuck ew why did i think that thats so gross” that proves that u dont actually think ur dad is hot which debunks the stupid assumption that a lot of ppl have that intrusive thoughts are that persons desires
One thing I hate is when you're friends with someone so they're really nice about your appearance and then when something happens and you split up suddenly you're the ugliest thing they've ever fucking seen
People do this in relationships too... It's called devaluation. It's a textbook tactic for people with narcissistic traits (I mean we all do to an extent. But definitely some more than others).
Most will know it as sour grapes...
fr my friends do this and i mean sometimes i oin in but in my head i really wish they didnt do that cause someone who is good with those features can get hurt and idk how to handle it i ignore when they say stuff like that now or pretend to laugh
That is a terrifying and gross pattern, absolutely. Or when you're the punching bag in a friend group and your appearance is a frequent target. It often reveals a lot about someone's character, how quick they are to pick someone apart based on their looks. Good, genuine people will help you feel confident and good looking and will not suddenly start calling you ugly during a disagreement. Shitty, shallow people will entertain themselves by putting you down based entirely on appearance. All of the unhealthy friendships I've had involved me being called ugly over and over one way or another; every great relationship I've had (and have currently!) involved genuine compliments, reassurance, and confidence boosts.
@@mwyaskii mean you can also just say that you find it annoying or a bad trait. If they do this to other people they most likely do it to you too when you’re not around. I know cutting off friends can be difficult but generally more positive people will find you if you try to be the best version of yourself.
@@mwyaski if you feel comfortable calling someone that acts like that a friend then you're not that much better than them
13:55
"nature's composers did not gave a fuck when writing your face's harmony" DAMN. I'm stealing that
in my opinion this also gets into ableism territory. or at least dangerously close to the corollary of equating physical disability or deformity with immorality. obviously neither of these are new things and the trend of ugly = immoral and beautiful = moral, or the concept of disability being something that happens to people who "deserve" it is something deeply ingrained in our society and perhaps the human psyche in general. i like to think we're making progress, though.
Yeah, as a disabled guy, I can confirm this is true. It often does slip into that territory in my experience.
I think there's something interesting going on here though, which is the way that disabled people often receive pity from others too, so disability is both perceived as well-earned karma and tragic injustice depending on whether you fit the right stereotypes about disability. For example, if you want to be treated better as a disabled person, consider being a child or having some savant ability.
@@yurisei6732 true. And pity ultimately never leads to any sustainable form of relationships (whether that romantic or friendly) for us. So either we can do no wrong, or when we do wrong we don't deserve forgiveness like able-bodied or conventionally attractive people. Both of these things are obviously very dehumanizing because they turn us into one dimensional caricatures and essentialize us.
oh it absolutely does. people will joke or even be serious about bad behavior -> illness. it might seem harmless at first but just think about it for a second.
@@madiv2098 yeah, and even if they are a little bit, I don't necessarily blame them. If you've been excluded from almost every social facet of human society since the beginning of civilization, I think you would be pretty bitter about some stuff too-I know I can be at times. That's not an excuse necessarily, but it is an explanation.
The fit is giving, the hair is ateing, the face card APPROVED, the lgbtq+ representation = THERE
English plz
@@cashout893you didn’t pass
Ateing..
@@kie927 yes… ateing
@@cashout893 so it is quite obvious what I meant, and yes the “ateing” was on purpose
Even outside of the mortality argument, ppl say the most negative shit about attractiveness. When I had an art twitter account, a black artist I followed said something along the lines of "Yall need to let go of black skin tone with orange tints cuz that is straight up ugly". Seeing people I follow agreeing with her and retweeting that tweet just made me wanna delete my account because, as a real life black person, my skin IS orange tinted. These generalized comments about appearances are just so hurtful for no reason and I hope more people realize this
That's one of the unfortunate consequences of art becoming such an accessible thing - we all get to have tastes in art now, but it can be hard not to start thinking about those tastes in relation to real people too, and real people don't look like paintings and shouldn't and can't be judged on the same criteria. For example, I often say that American accents sound terrible, but when I actually hear one in person, it usually sounds fine. My distaste for it is only an artistic one and I need to be careful not to describe that distaste in a way that incorrectly applies to normal people.
It's always the ones who can't draw who has the most toxic, unsolicited, and patronizing opinion towards artists. You have all the rights in how you want to do your art even if it's something downright comical like making them all literally yellow like the simpsons
Stay strong and block those kind of people before they can find you
The fact that there are people out there that still try to deny pretty privilege is WILD to me! But this is an issue that has gone back for centuries. Beauty is associated with angels, while ugliness demons. For example some girls call guys creeps for fairly normal awkward behaviour, but because the guy is less attractive, the behaviour is magically made worse somehow.
Or someone is arrested, but their picture gets on the internet and it turns out they're hot. People start campaigning to get them out of trouble. Man or woman, the hotter you are the more you get away with
Agreed. I’ve benefited by that, I am quite tall and I’m athletic. I don’t like that.
I don’t like this fact of “denying pretty privilege” that you point out. My whole career I’ve worked to get folks that aren’t traditionally in my line of work into it. The reality is pretty privilege is absolutely a factor in who gets hired. Personally, I did not consider appearance in my hiring decisions, but I am fairly certain some folks did.
It's funny how you bring that up cause lucifer's actually canonically hot AF
@@eternallylearning2811 The show or the bibble? 😝
@@neonte13I think even in the bible it was say that he is beautiful
They always say “I can fix him/her” whenever the mugshot photos come out, like, no you can’t!
Calling Miley Cyrus “non problematic” made my bones creek. 10 years ago I was a teenager during her Bangerz era. Her performance with Robin Thicke set the Internet ablaze
THANK YOU, IT'S CRAZY HOW PPL JUST F O R G E T
I was born this year so can someone tell me what happened
That, and the fact she's THIRTY 💀 "Wow, she hasn't aged, she must be a good person!" no babe, she's just barely old enough to have fine lines yet
good looking ≠ good person
is such a bad presumption it gets a lot of ppl to fall into this kind of trap that if you're inherently good looking you're like a saint
Or for some who think they're mean or players the population of this particular thought process is low but still exists,
Can we just stop tying people's morality with their appearance at all 😭😭
I love your skits bc they really put into perspective how stupid internet arguments would be if you had them IRL
I've seen a lot of ppl online make fun of a person's disability just cuz they're problematic and i think it's absolutely disgusting
Bowl of ice cream + new notevenemily video = happiness
TRUEEEEE
mmm! what flavor? i like mint chip
You are a person of culture @@HallowIsSmol
Damn, now I want ice cream, and I don't have any.
I look at people neutrally until I know more about them and their character, and then I decide how I perceive them. For instance, I could know a girl who is considered 'unattractive' by societal standards, but because I know what a kind, caring person she is, she's is gorgeous to me. On the other side, there could be a very conventionally attractive girl who is very mean to me and the people I care about, and I would see her as ugly.
In my opinion, your character defines your beauty. Your beauty does not define your character.
Many times in life i have struggled with identifying people by beauty😭. I always thought i was just low bar for not knowing any beauty standards.
This is actually a very normal thing and it's a big part of what drives the effect described in the video - it's the kernel of truth that makes people not immediately notice that judging people's morality by their appearance is stupid. The fact that we perceive bad people as less physically attractive than they "objectively" are is what makes us think that appearance is tied to morality and assume that people who are physically less attractive are also less moral. For random example using the nonsense number system, say you see Taylor Swift as a 6. If it came out that she was a terrible person, you might start perceiving her as a 4, and then you'd start associating being a 4 with being terrible. This has unfortunate consequences for people whom you naturally perceive as a 4.
@@HarutoVa ikr, what are the standards anyways, too much for my wee brain
Facts
I’m not even sure why beauty needs to be brought up in the first place though. Like, I’ve definitely judged people’s attractiveness based on their morals too, but how I subjectively rate someone’s attractiveness is completely irrelevant if I’m criticizing their character anyway.
When we make fun of a bad person’s looks, we’re not really getting to the root of the problem. If the problem is the person’s _behavior,_ their behaviour should be the biggest concern, not their looks.
I haven't watched the video fully yet, so I don't know if you mentioned this, but something that feels especially gross about this is that people who are under a lot of stress and/or have suffered from a lot of trauma in their lives age faster, especially those who can't afford all the beauty hacks and healthy food and creams etc etc etc.
Yess I think this point is commonly overlooked, things like dr-gs and alcohol and stress make you “age” visibly more which is directly correlated to why people with chronic illnesses, addictions, and poorer people often look older than their age. life is hard and it can show on your skin, and it is definitiely not a coincidence that most cultures associate poor/ill = ugly. the elite have made the culture that way.
The reverse can also happen with young children not being able to eat enough and therefore not being able to grow compared to others their age who eat well. They usually can end up looking younger than their actual age because of their size and how skinny they are.
This is a topic I could say so much about oml this was was refreshing to watch 😭 I feel like so often people are okay with saying things that are basically discriminatory when the person they’re referring to is ‘bad’. That doesn’t change the meaning of what they say. It’s the same attitude of those people who are horribly against a minority but has like one friend who they view as an ‘exception’ because that friend conforms to their standards.
Like you hate this guy because he’s racist, not because he’s fat. Talk about the bad things he’s done instead of acting like you should dislike him for another reason (example)
@@coffikattyes you ate with this comment
right like even not making fun of their looks people seem to think it's ok to misgender people or be sexist or something when they don't like the person. it just seems like some people don't actually believe in trans rights or gender equality when they're completely willing to give it all up just because the person they're talking about is a bad person or because they disagree about something. it doesn't hurt the target as much as it hurts other members of the marginalized group tbh
@@existential_horror5045omggg I’m glad you brought that up. It reminded me of the time I saw people talking about an autistic creator on TikTok who had done some problematic things, (although I don’t really remember what exactly, because this happened about a year or two ago,) and people used it as an excuse to mock their autistic traits. It was really gross seeing people doing that while no one said a word about it. Like, mock their crappy behavior that they have control over, not the disability they were born with
Reminds me of when the voice actor of Gumball was yelling slurs at Dream, but Dream was getting cancelled at the time so it was apparently fine???
I once called out a transphobe in a comment section and they told me to stop wearing charcoal for lipstick 💀 like huh?
??
Told a guy he was right-wing and he said I needed to get some b*tches because my pfp on insta is me with my cat. Does he not know how much women like single cat dads, or
They only have one tactic and one joke.
They really thought they ate that omg
I have acne and it makes me so uncomfortable when people are treating acne as some sort of punishment when I’m just like this because of a combination of genetics and that I have severe sensory issues with a lot of lotions… when I hear people say that other people look like me as some sort of punishment for being bad it really hurts because I try to be the best person I can…
This is the other way around but I think it’s the extension of the same bias… I have a close friend who is fat(I know in general fatphobia is worse than what I experience for my face but they both suck and sometimes we talk about our experiences being treated badly for our appearance and we support each other) and we had a conversation recently where we were talking about people assuming we did something wrong and it’s our fault for how we look and making assumptions on our lives and moral fiber based on it without even knowing us… like that was less explicitly about actual morality and more about us apparently being assumed to be like that due to not trying hard enough to fit the beauty standard and THAT being equated to being morally bad somehow which is kind of the opposite direction and a backwards extension of this same bias… it always seems so illogical and horrible to me to act like people’s appearance (which doesn’t impact anyone else but themselves, and in the case of both acne and weight actually has a wide range factors many of which are to varying extents not in their control) is somehow a sign of morality or lack thereof when the two are completely unconnected
I hate these posts bc all they do is remind me I'm probably not gonna "age well" bc i live in constant stress (mental illnesses suck) and struggle to live a healthy life
Glad to see someone making a video about this!
One thing that annoys me is when someone is caught in a controversy and suddenly everyone jump on them to call them ugly and repulsive like... you were acting from the beginning then?? You didnt even find them pretty from the beginning??
Im not pretty to begin with, does that mean Im doomed to be a bad person who has no morals or values ??
I don’t think that’s completely true. I wouldn’t say it’s all an act I think people can change their views on people depending on context. I do think that part of being social is a little acting but I don’t think everyone is massively pretending I think that people change there views of you according to information they have. If you are proven to be a bad person why would someone want it be around you. It’s not a act to adjust to new info
Also someone judging you for your looks doesn’t mean your automatically bad or even good
It’s just someone else’s perception of you which is different that what you actually do. Also try not let other people dictate your morality because that’s a huge trap
People can change their minds about things and you won’t know why but if you have a solid moral code then you can know if your moral or not without someone else having to tell you
another problem with the aging thing is that it can be affected by external factors like illnesses or the treatments for said illnesses, like chemo. and also not everyone has access to the resources a lot of the celebrities who ‘aged well’ do (that’s not quite the same thing, but on a similar topic)
This factors in how pretty privilege allows people to get away with crimes because they're conventionally attractive.
Like I've literally seen people defended murderers because they were 'pretty'
Everyone can be a horrific, awful person no matter what they look like. that's the true definition of equality.
YESSSSS THANK YOU SM
I really feel like this is a big really why the Fat Acceptance Movement gained such momentum. When I was a kid, being fat wasn't just bad for you, but it was always linked to being a worse person
Same thing with movies. Pre-Melissa McCarthy, fat women were rarely ever seen in big roles. I mean, we did have Precious and Phat Girlz(?) but even then those aren't even as big.
@@roxassora2706 Do those count? I mean, especially in Precious, her weight is not only shown to be a bad thing, but it's meant to convey how she isn't taking care of herself. Which is fine, except for that, yeah, we don't see enough just normal fat people. Being fat has to be tied with a lesson
@@rosesweetcharlotte Idk I've never seen Precious but I know of it.
It started off with just asking that fat people not be bullied for their appearance, which is fine. But now it's lost the plot. It's degenerated into actively glamorising and promoting fatness, to the point where they claim being morbidly obese is totally healthy, which is dangerous nonsense. And just look at the downright hate ex 'fat activists' get when they DARE to drop some weight and look after themselves.
It still is, fat characters are either stupid and jolly, lazy and jolly (and stupid), stupid and mean, or evil (and also stupid). It's rare that a fat character gets to just be a character without their body being significant.
My grandma is a wrinkly little raisin of a woman, practically the opposite of aging "well". She donates regularly to the local humane society, cares for her dogs like they're her children, and is one of the sweetest people I know. The idea that appearance has anything to do with morality is insane to me.
This whole topic reminds me of people intentionally misgendering folks who they deem as bad people, as though it's something you have to earn, inadvertently sending the message to other trans or NB people that if they mess up in some way, then their identity is no longer valid or will be used as a way to attack them. You really have to consider what basic levels of respect & considerations *everyone* deserves, because once we start picking and choosing who deserves it or not things get kinda... problematic lol
I always think of that one Roald Dahl page where it’s like “if a person is bad, it doesn’t matter how beautiful they are, the ugly within will always show. and a good, kind person, no matter how ugly they are, will always look beautiful” or however it goes. And not because I agree with it; it infuriates me because people always use it as validation to shit on people’s appearances if they’re “bad”. There is *literally* zero correlation between how someone looks and their personality or actions.
Yeah but the point of that paragraph is that if youre kind youll be attractive even if youre ugly. And pretty people will be offputting if theyre dicks.
I feel like that quote has such good intentions, but of course, people twist it.
"Actions matter, appearance doesn't " is a very good thing to believe.
the hatred of fat people in matilda made me feel terrible about myself when i was a chubby kid, so when i see that quote i get annoyed at dahl all over again
"If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until it gets so ugly you can hardly bear to look at it.
A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely."
I feel like people who think that pretty people must be good people have internalised the idea of the first paragraph whether they've ever read The Witches or not (the idea has existed and been prevalent since forever). When you take the first paragraph as literal (that their face literally changes to become ugly because they have "ugly thoughts"), then it reinforces the problems that Emily talks about here. If you take it figuratively, it's saying that a person who is consistently an immoral and reprehensible POS will become so ugly to you that you can hardly bear to look at them. Which is true. I can't look at people who have done horrible things even if there is nothing 'objectively' 'wrong' with their face.
The rest of the page says that a person's kindness takes precedence over how aesthetically pleasing they are, and that their kindness makes them loveable and beautiful people even if they have an 'objectively' undesirable appearance. This should nullify the first 'idea' completely--i.e. that you can tell if someone is good because of how they look physically, but like beep3242 says, people twist it. I think I literally just said what they said but in way more words... shit.
@@paperlacejane exactly! It seems like another case of a quote being taken out of context so much that it gets lost in translation. “Blood is thicker than water,” “jack of all trades, master of none,” are just a few other examples. It’s crazy to see how people would take Roald Dahl’s message as “we should start bullying bad people for their appearances now.”
I can't believe people actually think that. i always thought people who said that were just joking or complimenting that person for having no scandals. why are people this stupid??
i legit hate the halo effect sm. whenever i did something that my (paternal) grandmother didn't like, she would just straight up call me ugly. sometimes she would tack on that "its my personality. a pretty girl like me shouldn't do something so ugly and rotten". that could just be her internalized misogyny showing bc another time when i was 6, i was walking into her living room and she stopped me and said "whats wrong with your face? are you not happy to be here? why do you look so mad?" i just have rbf :/, and i told her that and then she said (I KID YOU NOT) "you should smile more, you look rotten and gross when you dont" bruh :/
No bc I came across a thread of a picture of DJ Khaled like twenty years ago with his shirt off DJing and half the comments were insulting his appearance and fat-shaming him. Insulting someone’s work or their personality is one thing, but tying that into their physical appearance or weight and insulting that too is not only devaluing to the argument about the person themselves but also sends a message to other people that look like him but are not bad people that they are worthless and slobby bc of their appearance. It’s awful to see so many people doing that.
Remember when some girls made a petition to let a guy out of prison because he looked hot?!?
Is this the guy who has popcorn hair and creepy big blue eyes?
The dude that was under the influence while driving and killed a mother and her child?
This reminds me of a Tumblr post I saw once with a picture of Nicki Minaj with the Olsen twins, and the caption was making fun of how the twins are younger than Nicki yet look older, and they finished it out with "white people age like onions (or milk or smth like that)" It just left a bad taste in my mouth because like, you can celebrate one person/group without tearing someone else down for something as superficial as what their face looks like. Not to mention the Olsen twins have probably been hearing mean comments about their appearances since they were literally babies...it was just so unnecessarily cruel. It was clear the poster didn't really care about lifting up Nicki Minaj and other black women, or if they did care it was still secondary to them just wanting to dunk on the Olsen twins for having plastic surgery or whatever.
Those kind of posts are so prevalent in 2013 tumblr. That's why i stopped following some black tumblr accounts bc all they do is mock other people in order to lift up black people
this is actually SUCH an interesting topic, gonna go get a snack and then watch this video, remember im obsessed with your content, then watch all your other videos
it's also super interesting how this topic links to religious shame, the impacts of poverty, hate toward minorities, eugenics, policing women's aging, how children can be set up for success by their caretakers... it's impossible to not be affected by it in some way.
i like that you mentioned that "its never okay to go after someone based on physical appearance- but will i admit that i have gone to that place in my head when someone is disrespecting me where i verbally attack that person calling them a disgusting troll who looks like a blender full of dump sludge. the difference is im not saying that out loud to the person…. in examples of someone being bigoted you do wanna see that person taken down a notch with a low blow" because it felt super relatable in this specific instance in my life.
i re-came out (first when i was a kid) as trans my senior year, and a friend i made in 10th grade said to me about 3-4 years after graduation "i'll just always remember you as -Deadname- though" and i also went straight to the poor taste imaged based come-back in my head "yeah and ill always remember you 30 pounds lighter than current day TF" like obviously thats wrong and not actually how i felt- i still didnt vocalize that to person- but when im being told by a "friend" that they uphold some version of me that they didnt even know me well enough to have a thumb in that pie- my brains gonna get a little nastyTM for a second
11:30 CHOPSTICK CHIC IS INSANE NOO 😭😭😭
“You have no couth and you have no decorum” 😭
DUDE NO WAY IM FIRST ILY EMILY IVE BEEN WATCHING FOR LIKE A YEAR AND A HALF AND U CONTINUE TO IMPRESS ME!!!! THANK YOU FOR CONSTANT QUALITY UPLOADS IM SO EXCITED TO WATCH
rs
the random stream of words as an argument was so extremely real
Tysm for this. I'm 21 and getting my first wrinkles and I've always been upset about this, but esp after i got my first wrinkle i have been in despair bc i know aging "gracefully" is being equated to goodness
Solidarity. My hairline stared receding when I was 18, forcing me to go completely bald at 23. The universe wasn’t balancing my Twitter account it was just genetics
@@TheJadedJames you must be lying, it's cause you used "gay" as an insult when you were an edgy 13-year old!!1! only bad people age * insert angry emoji*
The ageing determines morality thing really gets to me, especially when aging is actually often dependent on factors like stress/work, access to healthcare/resources, and genetics, essentially tying morality to...being born privileged enough and "genetically correct," things we should be steering far away from...
I was just watching a chad chad video and was about to go do something else but then she posted 😭
omg same
Same I was watching the new jojo one and abandoned it for this 😭
7:43 EMILY YOU’RE RIPPED OMG. YOU GO GIRLIE 💪😼
It’s such a dumb idea because I aged 5 years in one year because I was in an abusive relationship and that most definitely wasn’t me that was the problematic one
exactly
Those people who immediately start shitting on a person's appearance when they do or say something that they don't like are so pathetic
thank you for making this video bc i got jumped on twitter for saying it's wrong to make fun of dream's appearance no matter what he did
What dream did was terrible but i never get why people mock his appearance and face reveal. He's average at best imo
@@aeoligarlic4024 i think people just took it as a free pass to bully someone
She is so wise and caring. I know that I can trust her advice. Nobody this beautiful could possibly be a bad person.
Same problem with people assuming people in certain jobs can't do anything bad... as far as I'm concerned, everyone's individual and anyone can be heinous. I don't care what you look like or what you do, you can prove yourself one way or the other just like the rest of the world.
"No! On you it's like chopstick chique ... I say that because you're flat and scrawny, not because you're chinese."
HAD ME DYING HAHAHAH
“Natuers composer did not give a f*ck when composing your facial harmony” That was incredible and I’m passing away 💀
Omg I want her to hit one mil so bad her videos are so high quality!
Yk a lot of serial killer we’re attractive… still serial killers…
Ted bundy is one good example
@@ArissaHaque fr
@@ArissaHaqueI feel like the only person in the world who doesn’t find him attractive and I can find almost anyone good looking
@@youre764 that’s very relatable
we're, or were? We need to know
YEYY NEW NOT EVEN EMILY VIDEO JUST DROPPED
Also on the flip side there’s literal murderers who people sre obsessed about because theyre so conveniently attractive. Saying things like “id be happy if he chose to kill me!” Or “someone needs to give him a modeling contract asap instead of letting that beautiful face rot in prison”.
There’s also people who support]ed and were fans of certain people until something shady about their past comes to light. Then these fans are like “i always knew he was hiding something. I always got such bad vibes and now i know why” like b*tch please you were literally their biggest fan until those allegation came out 5 seconds ago”
Oh damn. My smile is also miles of gums. And I also once saw someone comment negatively about it in general. How miserable has someone's life to be to insult a look of genuine happiness and joy smh
Saw this happened irl. Was sitting in my class and this girl was called up to explain her groups research. Girl for no reason gave horrible attitude to my very kind professor and was just so nasty in tone and body language.
Thing is though that the group of girls at my table started to talk shit about her appearance and saying how she thinks she’s so hot when she really ugly.
I agree her personality is nasty but she’s a beautiful girl still. Has a slim figure that I’m jealous of and big blue eyes. It’s just crazy how quick people go into insulting problematic people over looks even when they’re average standard
This reminds me of how uncomfortable the body shaming of Trump I saw made me. Like, there is a lot to mock about that man, but his physical shape is pretty unremarkable for guys in their 60s and 70s. He just kinda looks like a lot of guys his age, and some of them are absolutely lovely people. They don't deserve to be collateral damage in people's mockery him. If you're going to go after him go after his actions, because the people that have THAT in common with him, they do deserve it.
Also, I noticed ill-behaved men online will get made fun of for being bald, as if it's punishment for them being a bad person. It really makes me sad how often I see people/women making fun of balding men, since it's not something they can control. Good men bald too 😭 my husband is an amazing person and happened to go bald at 17. It's a big insecurity for most men to become bald, and it is for my husband. For example Drew Afualo, who has great clap backs to shitty rude comments from men, but then will make fun of them for being bald. Makes me sad how much people will make fun of people's appearances just because they're a bad person.
"Good looking and charasmatic? Probably a good man".
Said the citizen about the newly-elected leader of his country. That same leader would later become the most oppressive dictator ever seen. And that citizen would not make it to the end of the week.
15:15 I think it’s natural to have negative/unkind thoughts sometimes, especially when something/someone is pissing you off lol. but yeah, it’s how you engage with or express them that has the potential to be a problem. Thinking something mean but not telling anyone or acting on it is not a problem imo! (only engaging in good faith discourse on this lol)
alsoo thank u for the parade coupon, love them 🙏
I love how right under this video there is a post talking about Anne Hathaway aging well because she is unproblematic 😂
"Nature's composer didn't give an f when writing your facial harmony." You are a poet.
1:00 I think it's sad in particular that 'problematic' has become part of binary morality discussions, when I actually think it's a very good word to show the complexity of things, you can like someone or something, but think they/it have elements that well, cause problems, and your able to acknowledge them alongside other qualities, for things to be problematic (unequivocally bad) or not problematic (unequivocally good) seems to remove one of the key uses of the word of enabling nuanced discussions of morality. And also judging people based on looks is obviously wrong no matter the reason, because, obviously
Exactly! Nowadays problematic is just “I don’t agree with literally everything this person has ever said or done”. “Unproblematic” in that sense is not the way to live, you’d be limiting yourself to silence in fear of offending someone
Agreed. As quickly as "problematic" came to mean "bad", it was originally a pretty good term, saying "it seems like there are potentially some problems here" rather than toss the whole thing.
I never really liked the binary aspect of Woke either; as though you're just fully awake and aware of all these social issues, or entirely asleep and obvious. Someone who might be really informed about one kind of oppression could have blind spots about others but still be identified as Woke either by themselves or others, whether it's a compliment or criticism
@@asafoetidajones8181 it is one of the very few areas where I somewhat agree with conservatives, unlike lots of them I don't think people have the right to do whatever they want and just say 'it was a joke' or 'stop being offended' and this vice signalling they do when they try to prove how offensive they are is just childish, but I do agree that people can make mistakes and that, while people should be criticised for them, it should be constructive criticism and, provided the person makes efforts to do the right thing most of the time, and they shouldn't have to have the mistakes define them forever
@@Antipaxos_Nadja123 agreed. Especially younger people. I can't imagine being publicly characterized by things I did or said as a teen, before smartphones and social media were a thing. It's an unreasonable standard to hold people to.
This but also with "ugly" filters. Like what if I looked like that or had similar features. I see people often using them to boost their own confidence.. like "well I could look like this" probably not thinking about people that might
I see this a lot with the gen z kids. They think im old at 30 when they are pretty close to my age.
They neglect the fact that they are aging as well.
I had similar comments from 17 year olds when i was 22.
Sometimes you just have to let time run its course, hopefully eventually theyll understand
it's like that one guy who killed two people with his car from reckless driving and tiktok wanted him to not go to jail because he was "cute"
there are memes that i believe are called wojak memes wherein there are attractive people are 'morally right' and the people in the wrong are the hysterical, conventionally unattractive people are do not agree with their views. just thought it was relevant here too.
girl your skits are so funny im on the floor crying 😭
it gives "mislabeling is fine bc they are a terrible person" vibes
i feel it's also important to point out that classism plays a HUGE role in this specific topic. The individual standards for what is considered beautiful keep changing over the centuries, but always are dictated by people that have wealth and power, aka the people that can afford the lifestyles, products, and treatments that help to achieve and maintain the ideal look. I promise you that just about any of these celebrities that still look the same or else "aged like wine" have almost certainly had work done and rarely actually just look like that. Morality has nothing to do with it.
every time someone covers a twitter issue they just end up explaining fundamental human ethics and basic common sense because twitter just cant seem to grasp moral concepts we were taught in kindergarten.
Then they say its because twitter is an app for “free speech” when the comment in question is just calling someone a beluga whale for streaming a selena gomez song
Ok I know that this is not the point of the video at all, but I was GENUINELY shocked when you were talking about your insecurities. Like, what you were pointing out had not once crossed my mind. I think when we look at ourselves every day, we pick apart every feature that people wouldn't even register unless they were specifically looking for it. When I see your videos (and I have watched quite a few) I genuinely just think that you are so beautiful, and witty, and intelligent, and I think your smile is lovely. I know this isn't going to instantly erase your insecurities (if you even read this lol), but it always helps me to hear another perspective :) Keep making fantastic videos!!!!!
Why are they comparing photos of 17yo Miley Cyrus to her 30yo self ?? Ofc she hasn't changed that much, she's not even aged yet, she's still pretty young!! ...
The internet if full of bad takes sometimes. The truth is strong people are gonna look rough cus they went through it, real age is real wisdom, there’s no way to fake it. Good on you for sharing your thoughts
HEY QUEEN! CANT BELIEVE IM HERE EARLY! LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!
I genuinely love your videos so much ugh, it’s just the way you word things and the amazing sense of humor. Truly no other youtuber can compare i’m sorry
Fun fact: this way of thinking actually starts with the ancient greeks, whose ideal of perfection was the καλοκαγαθία, meaning beautiful and good, because they thought that the body reflected if the soul was virtuous or not
Yoo, kalokagathia (im surprised i read that)! Yesss, ive also heard about that :))
It's funny how you mention gummy smiles becasue just a couple days ago I talked about how much I love gummy smiles ♥
i tried to smile like that on picture day when i was like 10 because i thought another girl in my class who had it naturally was so cute 😭
Oh yeah we do this a lot in korean, too
I don't know how it nowadays, but I grew up a LOT hearing adults talk about in-sang - basically the way you look+the vibe you give off. If you have good in-sang, then it's just assumed you're an overall good person. God forbid someone's good at faking shit or even, I don't know, a good looking person is a piece of shit.
Which is funny cause outside of the korean side of my life, my other friends were usually the opposite, like "oh if you're that good looking, you're probably an asshole"
The promo delivery was epic. 🏆