Before I go to bed, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who's been so ridiculously lovely and supported me with this kerfuffle. I was so nervous about uploading this video but knew if I didn't, every time something else bad happened at stage door I'd keep quiet, go home crying and my spirit would break a little more. I know I was right to address it but I still want to say sorry. For sounding ungrateful for the love and support you guys give me every day and for sticking with me, some of you, for years. I'm not ungrateful at all. Not even a little bit and I wish there was a better way to address this without it sounding like "Woe is me! I'm so popular and it's so hard having everyone love me all at once!". So I'm truly sorry for that and from the comments the majority understand that this isn't a case of me being precious but just that no one wants to be shouted at, have their hair pulled or their belongings rooted through or taken when they're leaving work, no matter what profession you're in. And in light of the tragic event of Christina Grime having her life taken at a meet and greet after a concert, although no where near her unbelievable standard of talent or following, I'm still currently erring on the side of caution. Thank you for being incredible. xxx
Carrie you don't sound like 'woe is me' people should be more respectful of your personal boundaries especially when it comes to the physically things like following you for taking your stuff, but should also be respectful of how you feel mentally towards everything that happens.... We love you Carrie. I can't wait to hopefully meet you in London at stage door to personally tell you how much I admire you. And just to even be able to tell you that would be a dream come true
You shouldn't feel guilty at all, it's not your fault and you shouldn't think you have to go at stage door to please everyone. People just need to be comprehensive and respectful, they should put themselves in your shoes for just a minute and see everything that's going on. Have a lovely night and continue doing what you're doing Carrie, you're doing and excellent job. xx
Carrie. It is OKAY. It is okay for you to tell us. And It is okay for you not eanting to go to stage door when you dont feel like it. What it's NOT okay is that you feel guilty when you dont go to stage door. The people that dont understand that are the people who DONT deserve your worries. so dont. we love you, and we understand you. And you work alctually work R E A L L Y hard on everything. and thay everything is a hole lot!!! You are doing great, and we could be happier (could we?) couldnt be happieeeer. right dear? GOOD night Carrie!!
Dear girl, sleep! I can actually understand how you feel. These moments will come and go, I certainly guarantee. Yes, I know you know this, :) but I thought to remind you anyhoo. You are amazing, the fact you put your heart on your sleeve and are truly (he!) yourself, is in a way, wonderfully brave. Yet you have nothing to hide! Which others may, (as you know) unintentionally take advantage of, however, that doesn't stop you being you. Thank Moaf. (Mother Of All Fairies) Never stop being kind! To others or ESPECIALLY yourself! How can you help others or cheer others up or have fun when you too, need some looking after. You have to be your own best friend as well, listen to yourself and your body, we can all be a bit like Alice in Wonderland, "I give myself very good advice, But I very seldom follow it". I am DEFINITELY like dear Alice. I am very happy you have addressed this problem, as this is something which needs some understanding/explaining! I have worked in theatre (mainly amateur) most of my life, and certain things even WE wouldn't find acceptable even when we are being lenient, there is a time where we have to say "STOP," enough is enough. In your position you have every right to make such a video, and I proud that someone like you, who I believe to be such a brilliant influence, young or old (I'm in the Older sector. *waves*), this is so so important. Not only is this about you, this is about other's who work in theatres across the world. You are as real as everyone else, and when you need time for yourself, you should be able to do so. Also, the Stage Door, is a FIRE EXIT too, for health and safety reasons people are IN THE WAY... Sorry, "cap lock". I know you know your followers and fans love you greatly, and thank Moaf, they are understanding. And this should also open some mind and thoughts about form of etiquette. (Etiquette? I think that's the right word.) Okay, I have babbled enough to you dear one. Sorry! If you see this, I hope this made SOME form of sense to you. I send my love and hugs and all the support the universe can send for me to you. Sleep well as much as you can! OKAY I'M GOING!!. (Sorry.) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Every time she apologizes it just hurts me. Making your safety a priority is not moaning and it's not something to be sorry for. Everyone feeling entitled to a meet and greet at stage door are the ones moaning. People need to learn some basic respect.
I want to cry. This is so shitty. How could anybody think this is okay like wtf. People need to calm down. You're overreacting at all. You need to stop putting stranger's happiness before your happiness Carrie. If you need to take a break your real audience who actually cares about you will support it. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this bc nobody should. There's no reason for it and it's very sad.
I feel so incredibly awful that it was my mum that cued this. You're never obliged to meet anyone after or before a show and it's an extra privilege if we do get to. Shows are super tiring (I get that, I do them and not even to the extent you do!) and especially after a 13 hour day I understand completely. Thank you for speaking about this though, I know you're worried about it but we will always support you and be as respectful as possible towards you and any other member of the cast/theatre
Oh no please don't think it was your mum that caused this video! It's been an on going thing for close to three years now and I've been wanting to say something for a long while. I started scripting this video when someone tried to kiss me at stage door the other week. That was a big line that got crossed and I went home and cried and it's just taken me a while to actually make it. Your mum just wanted us to meet and that's really lovely. Her intentions were good! :) xxx
+ItsWayPastMyBedTime Thank you for understanding what was meant! Watching this video was actually heartbreaking because some people just don't understand that you work so hard and that you have barely any time to yourself to just take a break. I'm so sorry that your had to go through this, you should never have to experience these things. On a rather topical note, thank you for coming out stage door tonight! There was a huge amount of people so thank you for being so lovely and calm, it was truly lovely to meet you (pardon the pun!) xx
I met you two years ago at the Les Mis stage door with my sister and little cousin. That day you had an interview after the matinee performance and tweeted that you couldn't come to stage door, my sister was disappointed but myself and my mum explained to her that you had other responsibilities and she understood immediately. We were fortunate enough that after the show we were getting drinks at a pub just round the corner and as we stood and chatted, myself and my sister with bubble tea, we caught a glimpse of your hair. And my sister was so excited. You, even after doing an interview, stayed to meet the very few people that were still waiting at stage door hours after the show to meet you. And you made our day, you were more than happy to take photos and have a chat. You were so so sweet to my little cousin who was shy but you got down on your knees to be at her level and talked to her, complimented her flower crown and thanked her for coming to the show. I am so grateful for that X
Let me start off by saying I'm a hopeful old enough to be your Mum. Here's what I'm thinking, purely 30 seconds after watching this video. Just because you are a "well known" face, does not, and definitely should not mean that your privacy and right to personal space needs to be secondary in your thoughts. As wonderful as social media is, it can give a minority of the viewers a belief that they "know you" like they would a friend. You give so much of your actual time, your thinking time, and most of all your very honest and kind heart to your fans, the time and space you keep for yourself is not only perfectly natural, but necessarily essential...Always remember you are wonderfully lovely, and loved, in a week where horrible things have happened to wonderful people just going about their day this is more important than ever. It is 3000% right to put yourself and your needs (for any reason you have at all, no excuses needed) first. Much love. xx
There is absolutely no need for you to apologise, darling. The only people who need to say sorry are the ones who feel entitled to treat you so horribly and impersonally - it boggles me sideways how anyone can have such a lack of respect for a fellow human being. Your safety, comfort, and wellbeing are absolutely what you should prioritise, and you do not have to feel guilty for putting yourself before other people's feelings (easier said than done, I know!) I'm sorry that you've had to have those bad experiences, and I hope people will be more respectful of you from now on. Lots of love and hugs xx
Me and my friend went to stage door after seeing Chitty in Newcastle on a Wednesday night. We were the 2nd people there and we kept getting shoved out of the way by people trying to get to the front :( like I know people are eager to meet Carrie because of how exciting it is but it was quite disrespectful. We were very grateful to meet Carrie and chat with her for a while but we didn't assume that she would come out, we said that we'd go to stage door afterwards and if she was there then great, but if not then it would be a shame but it would be completely understandable. It upsets me how continuously apologetic Carrie is in this video because she has nothing to be sorry for, and it's awful that people have (perhaps unintentionally) guilt-tripped her for not being somewhere she isn't obliged to be.
were you there the first Wednesday it started ?? it was crazy people were huddled so close to the door and just shoving each other i just stayed well away and just watched from the back did try to see what was going on but was shoved away or stud in front of so sad things like that happens to Carrie she does not deserve it after the amazing shows she does
+Eilidh Bellis yeah we were, it was insane! I couldn't believe how tightly packed everyone was. Despite the chaos it was amazing to meet all the lovely hopefuls and fans of the show. The amount of amazing and kind people definitely outweighed the people pushing and shoving!
+Charlotte Marshall same here, I know amazing how people could move! oh yes definitely worth it saw the cutest smiles of the younger fans/hopefuls glad you enjoyed it too :)
+Eilidh Bellis There was this little boy, maybe 7 or 8 and he was like "you were amazing as Truly Scrumptious you're a really good actress!" And it was so cute!! Carrie came to me and my friend after he said that but we were just all in awe at how adorable he was
you shouldn't be worried about making this post public. honestly carrie, you do not own anyone anything, you do not deserve people being mad at you because YOU are just a person trying to get on with their job and day. we love you and we will ALWAYS support you no matter what. i hope you're okay Carrie xxx
That person who yelled while you were filming this was scary. That was honestly scary as hell. I am so sorry that you are afraid to leave a building that you work in, with good reason. That's awful Carrie. I really hope the people who come to see you calm way down, you don't have to feel bad that you can't always come to stage door especially considering that there are some crazy aggressive people out there. I hope you can feel safe again soon :(
Stage door etiquette is so important!!! I am so sorry that people are forgetting that :( Actors stopping to sign and meet people at stage door is not a requirement. Its a privilege for us fans and we should be respectful and thankful for that privilege. Carrie you are just a human being, like the rest of us. You don't need to feel bad about posting this. You deserve respect and its completely okay to spell out your thoughts and comfort level. I hope people take this video to heart and remember to think about their actions and words at stage door, and just everywhere else in general.
Carrie, please don't apologize. This is not just a video about you moaning, this is you taking care of yourself. Self-care is so important and I'm really sorry you've had such awful experiences before. I'm certainly not as known as you but I've had long hair all my life and have had people touch it, or me, without asking before and I've also had people complain afterwards because I ducked away from their hand or told them not to. Please don't feel guilty because you're telling people to treat you like a human being because that's something that they should be doing anyway. Sending love.
Carrie, never ever apologise for calling people out like this. Your dedication to your craft is a huge inspiration, and you have every right to be respected and treated fairly! It saddens me every time I see a tweet from someone who feels entitled to meet you, regardless of your personal circumstances. I hope the situation sorts itself out - anxiety is a pretty shitty thing that I wouldn't wish on anyone xxxx
Isobel F Yay! I honestly love being part of such a kind community who support each other, and that's all thanks to Carrie. She owes us nothing at all. :) x
That is definitely not good Hopeful behavior. This community is lovely and kind and understanding. Maybe those people need to be given a pinky reminder to be kind to others!
What the hell is this world coming to? It's really difficult not to be disheartened when hearing something like this. People these days don't know how to behave properly. Treat others the way you want to be treated!
I feel like, unfortunately, it is culturally popular to be mean to someone. I am not talking about just events happening at Stage Door (though it is included) but if you ever have a differing opinion of someone, people don't respect that you have differing opinions and this is where this cultural bullying has started. What we need in this world is a new revolution that says BE Respectful!
You don't need to be sorry for uploading this, you're not being offensive or rude in any way at all. You've been incredibly respectful, even when you have cause not to be. Not too long ago, a man grabbed my arm in the street and was trying to get me to go with him, so I know how scary it can be. No one should be touched if they don't want to be, so I sympathise a lot. I hope that this makes people think twice about their behaviour at theatres. Most importantly, I hope these experiences don't put you off living your life as you want to, Carrie. Nothing in this world is worth losing your mind over. Take a deep breath, tell your feelings of anxiety that they can't win and live as you want to. That's what I do, even if it is tough. x
I completely agree. I felt terrible after watching this, especially because she apologized for asking people to stop treating her like public property...
***** I'm fine, thank you. Reading this back I think I made it sound way worse than it actually was. :P He didn't hurt me or anything, he just put his hand on my arm and was saying how he wanted to 'get to know me' and then whether I would get in his car. I just told him to leave me alone and walked away very quickly. It freaked me out a bit but other people have way worse experiences. I appreciate you asking though, I hope you're well. xx
You should not be ashamed in anyway for having to make a video asking people to be people. What some people do is so disrespectful and damn right you should tell them. It's not your fault! Xx
I've met you at various stage doors now and every single time I take the time to thank you for your time because THAT is what we should do. That is MY place at a stage door to thank you and every other performer in the show who is okay with stopping to talk to a stranger for the two hours you just gave us and worked your arse off for. I've seen rude people at stage door, Newcastle Theatre Royal for Chitty (it was the saturday evening of the first week) was the most recent and I was so upset that I ranted my entire way home about the amount of disrespect I saw from one person. The only reason I went to stage door that day was to thank the performers who had put a massive smile on my face during quite a difficult week. I thanked you and told you the truth (which was that your doll on a music box was beautiful) and let you go on your way. I missed Lee, I saw him leaving but he was in a hurry and I saw people running after him and all I could do was roll my eyes. I was excited to see him but it is not place to get in the way of someone elses day. I DID go to twitter the next day and say that I had missed him but I understood why and did my thanking there. Performers do not owe anyone anything, they are not toys - they're people. I'm sorry that you feel like you have to make this point over and over again and I'm sorry that some people aren't capable of decent interactions with you. I hope you know you don't owe anyone anything other than working your butt off on the stage, that is your job and you are damn good at it. Hearing what you've been through makes me so angry (and if you ever need a body guard just let me know ;) ). I hope you are okay Carrie xxx
Just as an addition to this, one thing I saw at the same stage door at Chitty was grown adults pushing in front of children. Young kids being pushing out of the way or cut in front of. There was a blind girl who must have been about 12 or 13 at stage door that night and I saw a grown man push straight in front of her knocking her off balance. It's terrible how people think this is an appropriate way to behave.
I'm heartbroken to see you treating this matter on a video. That's just stuff you don't even need to ask, it's just about having manners and being polite and care about others beside yourself. Unbelievable it has to be said. (Sad to say: don't ever come to Brazil. For me it's hard to imagine a more respectful people than English people and these horrible acts you describe happen all the time in Brazil with famous people. With women, especially.)
I think there's a huge different between genuine Hopefuls and just fans of yours. The difference being that us Hopefuls completely understand that you are a human, not a machine, and that you can't do absolutely everything for each and every one of us. You do so much for us as it is, that you really shouldn't be 'required' to be at stage door. You work so hard and deserve all the breaks you need - and Hopefuls should (hopefully ;) ) understand that. I saw Les Mis and didn't meet you there, but I met you at SITC '13, and I don't support you any less, just because you weren't at stage door that night!
If you don't agree with this statement you don't deserve to be a fan of Carrie as she puts so much into these videos and you all need to respect that Thank you Carrie you're amazing xxxx
I went to see you at the Nottingham show and I wondered if it would be okay to meet you at the stage door, I had heard stories about how it's not acceptable to invade someone's space after they have just done a massive performance. I noticed there were a lot of other people waiting for you, so I thought it would be okay. When I met you, you were the most amazing sweet person and even though I pretty much froze up, we still had a picture and I asked to hug you, you didn't have to and you did. You don't have to do any of it and you do, you treat us like we're your friends, but don't let that guilt trip you, I can't imagine what it must be like to have to go through an exhausting performance to then have to meet lots of us back stage when all you want to do is go home and have a cup of tea. So please Carrie put yourself first because as long as you're happy, we will be too xxxxx
i met you at Newcastle with my friend Marie and there were some lovely people like one said oh those girls can go before us because they've been longer and that was lovely but i could tell some people were being slightly harsh and ITS TOTALLY UNNECESSARY. You are one of the most utterly brilliant people out there and we were so shocked that you did come out!! at the end of the day you are a human who deserves just as much respect as the next person; Carrie if its getting too bad do not feel guilty; the people complaining are probably the ones who do all the horrible stuff; they don't count, focus on the people who genuinely love and care for you💗.
i felt the same way at Newcastle on the first day it was there was quite scared and anxious (which i weirdly told Carrie when she nicely hugged me )i stayed right at the back and literally just wait for her to approach me first,so sad things like that happens to Carrie she does not deserve it after the amazing shows she does
its was crazy! lee mead and Andy Hockley (the man that played grandpa) came out and no one batted a eye lid they were all huddled screaming next to the door! x
I met you in London a couple of years ago before seeing Les Mis. I always felt bad because I saw you and stopped you in the street when you were having your own personal time. I was forever grateful that you stopped for a chat and a photo though. I met you again the other week in Newcastle after seeing Chitty and you were still so humble :) Ignore the people who treat you like crap Carrie! We love you
This video popped up today. I clicked it, thinking 'oh, I should know this in case of meeting her someday. I might make her uncomfortable.' and watching it, "WHAT THE *UCK?????" how can people like that be your fans, be Carrie's fan?? I am so shocked. Though this is years ago I still can't believe those people really existed or exist.
All of your worries are completely valid and you don't owe anyone anything, if you don't want to go out stage door, then by all means don't and stay happy and safe!
Never ever apologise Carrie, I've seen how mental it can get a various stage doors (I work in theatre too) and it can get really overwhelming and a bit panic inducing, especially if you're just trying to get through. Keep your chin up lovely lady! xxx
Stage door would give me so much anxiety too if I was in your position. I know with the job I have now all I want to do after work is go home quickly and quietly. You're so awesome and I am 100% positive that anyone who truly is a "fan" of yours will respect you and your thoughts on this. Your metal health and safety is far more important. sending lots of love!!
That's absolutely terrible, no one deserves to be treated like this, especially not you. They should be the ones apologizing. I can't even believe that as soon as someone becomes somewhat famous they are treated like playthings... Stay strong Carrie ❤️
Darling you don't need to be sorry for speaking your mind. There is a quote that I love, I can't remember who said it but it goes like this; "The truth is always okay to say. It's how people react to the truth, that may cause a problem." Your feelings are valid, you are allowed to feel them and to express them as long as you do it in a respectful manner. Which I feel you did! I know what it's like to have social anxiety and it's NOT fun. I hope you can get past this, and I hope people respect you enough to stop with the negativity. Love you and STAY STRONG!
Everything I wanted to say after watching this video, has already been summed up by lovely people in the comments. You don't need to apologise Carrie, not at all. Do what makes you happy and only do what you feel comfortable doing xx
If you're at stage door before or after the matinee performance tomorrow, I'm going to give you a massive hug even though you have no clue who I am - you make me feel like more than a fan, but a friend. A friend who you support through everything, a friend who you allow to dream as much as they want because you know that if they dream hard enough, and are motivated, they can do anything. You're my favourite UA-camr, singer, actress, etc.. for a reason. You're so gorgeous, wonderful and your personality is one that I could only dream of having. As a aspiring theatre actress, I know the stress and craziness of preforming on stage and I'm only 15 and in school still. Look, Carrie, if I could give you a massive hug now. Please don't be afraid of making this public - you have the RIGHT to do just that, and people who maybe don't follow you on Twitter, or have your notifications on, won't see this, meaning nothing will change inside them - you're strong, Carrie. If you're uncomfortable +
+ making it public then don't, but if something inside you is telling you to make it public than I think you should, but only do what makes you happiest. Trust me, your anxiety is valid and you're allowed to feel this way. As much as I want to meet you, if you don't come to stage door before or after the matinee in Plymouth tomorrow I won't mind because it's ALL OKAY, but if you do please know you're gonna get the biggest, warmest hug! I am so excited to see you in Chitty tomorrow, thank you for being such a wonderful, supportive person - you never fail to make me smile. I love you. Xoxox -River (@cinderiver)
I know you mean well and your comment is lovely, but the fact that despite everything she just said about being touched by strangers you just said you were going to find her and hug her makes me think you missed the point a little bit. By all means say hello, but please never, ever, ever touch anyone in any way without their spoken consent first.
+Sawyer W. That's what I was thinking lol, no wonder Carrie doesn't come outside if even after this video people still say they're going to give her hugs...
this still angers me so much. what infuriates me even more is that you feel the need to say sorry! I've seen some of the horrific abuse tweeted at you, especially from ungrateful childrens parents, thats damm right shameful and they should be cautioned for abuse imo.
I went to see Kit Harington in Doctor Faustus (amazing btw) the other week and afterwards we saw him at stage door, he was very gracious about signing things and photos etc, but the whole time there was a bodyguard there making sure that everyone stayed a certain way away and stopping people from getting too in Kit's face and after a certain period of time he encouraged Kit to just go home in the car that was waiting for him, and everyone accepted that. Do you have any sort of security or personnel protecting you? Because without that guard, I'm sure many of the people in that crowd could have turned quite nasty quite quickly, and that terrifies me.
I don't remember there being anyone whose specific responsibility was the safety of the actors who chose to linger at stage door (in my case, just Carrie, as the others who came out seemed to be in a hurry to get home) when I met Carrie there, but it would be a good idea, especially in casts with exceptionally well-known actors. Harrington is an example of someone who is well-known _far_ beyond the crowd who typically go and see a Marlowe play, though.
i was thinking the same thing at Newcastle but i asked my dad (he's a security guard ) when he picked me up he said he could see security standing near but don't think they did a good job of keeping things clear
I was at Faustus Wednesday night - the crowd was so pushy (and huge), it was quite alarming, and Kit actually went back inside after about 5 minutes, left by another exit and then got in a car discreetly (although an autograph hunter guy did chase him).
Please don't feel the need to apologize for speaking out against something that makes you feel uncomfortable, unsafe, or unhappy! You are a wonderful human being who deserves respect and time alone as much as the next person!
You have nothing to be sorry for! Many of us understand that the whole Stage Door system is a relaxed, pressure-less, if-it-happens-it-happens deal. I'm sorry you have to go through some of those terrible things- I hope it makes you feel better knowing that the majority of us are just super grateful for letting us share in your life and success and watch you do what you do so positively and brilliantly! I'm looking forward to seeing you in Chitty in not too long, and I may come to stage door, but I don't have any expectations or demands- it's enough of a treat watching you on that stage, as it was with Les Mis! (Also actually coming to your book signing the day before- can't wait to meet you!) All the love xxxx
No need to apologize even once Carrie! You are completely in the right her. If people aren't treating you respectfully, you have no obligation to come and meet people if you are going to feel anxious about being manhandled!! Lots of love from Canada
I am coming to watch Chitty when you come to the Marlowe. I am hoping to go go to stage door to congratulate you, if not I wont be disappointed or hurt, at the end of the day I am there to watch a show that I love and enjoy the experience of watching the very first show I watched on WestEnd (I saw it when you were playing Jemima) Wish you and the rest of the cast the best of luck during the rest of the tour and can't wait to see you perform as Truly!
Carrie, this is one of the many reasons why I have followed you for so many years. Your wisdom and honesty is so spot-on (this is coming from a fellow actor, singer & writer two years your elder). I wish the world were full of more people like you! You're awesome.
I was actually at stage door whilst you were recording this video! However I so understand how you must be feeling and would never want you to feel dissapointed! I was so grateful to watch the show, which by the way was so wonderful and I had a lovely time. Yes, it was a little upsetting but you are human, and the life you are living is already so jam packed! you should never feel obliged to do something because people are making you feel bad. I waited to just to say Hello and let you know How wonderful you are, but even though you didn't come, I don't regret waiting because i caught a great sun tan and I met Barry from Eastenders!!! How can I complain about that! You are so wonderful and never let people make you feel bad because of that! p.s I left my letter with the stage man so I do hope you got it! :) well done on the amazing show, can't wait to see what you do next! x
So sad about people being mean to you when you don't stage door and attack you when you do. Here in NYC, sometimes actors who can't stage door actually Pre-sign the programs for the audience so they don't leave empty handed. When I saw Cabaret with Alan Cumming, he did that. Ramin Karimloo did it as well with Les Miz on Broadway and even tweets SORRY NO STAGE DOOR TONIGHT. LOVE YOU ALL WHO CAME TO THE SHOW. if you need anything, you'll always have the love we give you here on UA-cam Love you Carrie.
Usually I'll tweet something like "please be respectful blah blah blah" when it happens and a few have said I'm moaning for the sake of it and I should be grateful people are there at all. So I thought making a video would be worse. But now I'm just kinda sad and worn out and just felt I had to say something. xxx
I understand that you're trying not to offend your fans, but those who really love you and care about you should know that safety comes first. Glad you're okay and please be careful in the future. Love ya :) xoxo
Calling you disrespectful for not showing up at Stage Door is literally the worst. I can't believe people have been treating you this way, seriously, I just can't understand how someone would just grab you or your stuff without even asking and even if they asked, how weird would that be?! I'm sososo sorry, that people do this weird stuff. "Stagedooring" is a bit different where I live, I guess. I'm in Austria and we do have two very popular theatres and many german speaking actors who are more or less regularly here (Anton Zetterholm was here for example :3) and we have our own kind of "stage door culture" here. But the one thing we ALL agree on, whether we're hard core fans and have seen the show 3739362x, or a fan who's at SD the first time ever, we ALL respect the actors. We don't usually touch them without asking (there are always exceptions, mostly teenage girls who probably just don't know better) and we all let actors pass if we know they're tired or just having a bad day.
I guess what I'm trying to say is (before I ran out of space) is, that you're in no way obliged to do what those people want you to do if you do not feel comfortable with it. Please do tell them no! They might just not know any better and if you say "Sorry, but no, I don't want to hug you/give you my phone/let you touch my hair." they may learn from it. I really hope you'll feel less anxious over time. When I met you at SD at Les Mis it was such a wonderful experience and I would love one day to meet you again. I hope those people won't ruin the experience for you, lovely. Stay strong, say no if you need to & we all love you! You're such an inspiration and you definitely don't disappoint us! We all understand! xxx
Never apologize for prioritizing your safety. The people who are upset by you not being there to the point where they send angry tweets are the types of people who may also think it's okay to be disrepectful to you in person. Just like you say, a ticket doesn't grant you a signing as well, it's a bonus if it happens.
People act like this? The world is so gross. I would consider it an honor to even see you perform. You don't owe anyone anything. You are doing what you love and are EXTREMELY good at, and you have nothing to apologize for. You're amazing, Carrie. Try not to let anyone negate the fact that you are TRULY beautiful just because you don't grant their every wish. Hoping you stay strong.
Margaret Rose I was outside the whole time who ever shouted wasn't at stage door and wasn't shouting for Carrie to come out. Tbh in the middle of the town it could b anybody.
Carrie I just want to say thank you for coming out and being so humble and lovely and taking the time to take photos and sign my book at stage door in Sheffield. I do understand completely and you were so completely truly scrumptious and kind ❤️❤️❤️
That kind of behaviour is actually horrible. You wouldn't treat any other professional like that, and artists should be no exception. You're completely entitled to feel this way. Your safety as a performer, as well as the safety of those around you, should be paramount.
This is something that definitely needs to be talked about. I feel so sorry for you that you have to go through those scary, negative aspects of going through stage door. Some people forget that actors and performers are people and deserve to be respected. They should understand if you can't see people and they don't deserve to know your reason because it is your life and not theirs. Yes I understand peoples disappointment but that is nobodies fault. It is bound to happen. You don't deserve those messages that are designed to or will make you feel bad. I send you lots of hugs.
I've never commented on a video before but just want to say I have massive respect for you because standing up for yourself and other performers like that takes guts because people don't tend to take your job seriously and seem to forget that famous/well known people are humans too. I hope this message resonates with the people treating you badly and keep doing the amazing things you do X
Carrie it's not okay that you have to say sorry for asking people to be nice and respectful. as you said it's not obligatory, it's just something that you choose to do and it's completely, 100% and more than okay if for some reason you can't, reasons which are compelletely understandable. sending all the love xx (also great mug!)
That's absolutely horrible to hear Carrie. I'm so sorry that people don't have manners around you at stage door! Somehow, people seem to mix up the fact that celebrities are something more than what they are: simply normal people like us. And because of this, they forget that they need to be treated and respected in the same way. I've seen the way people are around celebrities, and it baffles me. So sorry that you have to go through this. Really hope they realize that and that you can be comfortable again and that you have lovely experiences after this!!
I went to meet Carrie at the stage door when she was in Les Mis and I gotta agree that it gets pretty hectic with people pushing each other so I totally see her point, she is only human after all.
Aww Carrie you don't have to feel bad or guilty for anything. I think this has come across well and just shows that your a real person with real anxieties/feelings. I was the one who asked about stage door in your last live and you directed me here which I am glad you did. You do whatever is right for yourself and never let anyone make you feel bad for that. xx
There is absolutely no need at all to apologise Carrie, and it's so awful how people are behaving around you, I hope things start to improve, sending you so much love xx
You don't need to apologize, Carrie! You are an actress and that means your job is to act. Period. This is what you get paid for and everything further, including stage door, is 1. like overtime you are NOT obliged to do and 2. when you leave the theatre you are a just another Person and you can whatever you want. So nobody should make you feel guilty about needing some privacy. I sincerely hope this video will make a difference on how you are threatened at stage door. But at the same time I feel incredibly sorry that you needed to film this video in first place. Lots of Love💜💜💜
it's not you who should feel sorry for saying these things and uploading this video, it's the people you're talking about that should apologise for making you feel so uncomfortable. don't be sorry, Carrie, you're more than right. I hope the people who need to hear this are watching. much love to you!! :)
As a fellow performer and creative I just wanted to say I am 100% with you. I have also met you at stage door after Les Mis and I was so star struck I couldn't form words, my friend called out to you and you stopped talked and had a photo with us all. And I ridiculously offered to take the photo and someone kindly offered to take it instead. Stage door is your way in and out of work, and I know when I leave stage door (I am by no means as popular as you nor as professional and my stage door is am dram or uni) I would love to meet the people who watched me. The theatre is my safe place, and I hope that it's still yours. Like you say the bad experiences are far and few between but I hope that they do not out weigh the good experiences for you! Keep doing what you do, the world is a better place for it xox
Part of this was an indirect at me because a few months ago I asked if I could go to stage door without a ticket as I couldn't afford them at the time but I still really wanted to meet her and she replied to me on Twitter and I completely understood, but she also mentioned it in this video, and now I feel like crying. I know you probably meant me here Carrie, and I'm so sorry if it's my fault that this video came to fruition, I was just asking a question, and I totally respect you as an actor, so please don't be upset! And I'm sorry that people are so horrid to you at stage door. You don't deserve that whatsoever xxx
Aww don't feel bad because you actually asked if it would be an okay thing to do and you respected what she said when you got a reply, whereas some fans would have gone to meet her anyway or would have totally disrespected her and would have reacted to her in completely the wrong way! I'm sure it wasn't aimed at you :) x
Seriously don't worry or get upset. I really don't think this is a personal indirect at all. She literally gets 1000's of messages a week - whether tweets, emails, comments and other social etc. I think she just did this video for her personal safety in general and it was really good of her to be clear with her boundaries to the general public. IF anything the fact you even asked is more respect than the people she is calling out for inappropriate behaviour within the video.
Sounds like you are child's play compared to some of the stuff she's had to deal with regarding this issue :) I think you are the last reason this post was put up, unless of course you took her phone x
I'm so sorry you've had to go through that - to be honest I find this absolutely outrageous. Even if you just didn't feel like going to stage door at one point for no particular reason whatsoever, people should respect that. You're a human being, not a puppet.
Carrie you absolutely do not come across as moaning as the things you are describing would make almost everyone anxious or even panicked and anyone who really cares about you as a person will recognise why you made this video you are so amazing and humble and you should always know that you are fabulous.
Ok quite simply, anyone who is upset/angry/abusive towards you for not being at stage door is clearly not mature enough to recognise the reasons why. I work in theatre a lot as a musician, and I myself deal with entering/leaving through the stage door (needless to say no one ever stops me!), but so I can understand where you're coming from. As just a huge fan of theatre in general, I like to sometimes wait at stage door just for the chance to meet and thank the actors/musicians for their brilliant work. However, naturally sometimes some of the actors I'd like to have met don't come out, and you know what, a part of me is like 'oh well that's a shame', but the rest of me is like 'well that's fair enough, they've got lives to get on with'! It's incredibly tough and unfair for you because you've got a huge youtube audience, many of whom may not be a typical theatre-goer, so they will go to stage door with the EXPECTATION of meeting you and getting a photo/autograph (whereas I for instance would go with the HOPE of meeting and thanking you). I guess what I'm saying is I know it's hard to deal with people being disappointed and tweeting you angry messages, but you've really just got to try and not let it get to you. Because the problem isn't yours, it is theirs. 100%. So just keep doing what you're doing x
Dear Carrie, I came here expecting a lovely, lighthearted and fun video, and I got this instead. But this is way, way more important. Thank you for explaining this to everyone. Some times people need this extra push to realize that their actions affect others. This kind of transparency and honesty is good, even though it's hard to do. So thank you. You're such a lovely and kind person in all of your videos, and it's always nice to see that this continues even when it comes to the less pleasant things. Thank you for showing us how to be gracious even when you probably don't feel like it.
Hey, I was actually outside SD while this was filmed waiting for Lee, and I just thought I'd let you know that the guy shouting from outside was actually shouting "Barry" at Shaun Williamson... Just one less thing for you to feel anxious about :)
I'm in shock right now. I cannot believe that people would be so ugly to you. I knew that stage door could be chaotic, but this? I could not have even predicted this. You deserve so much more than that. I'm disgusted by some of the things these people do, and the fact that you still go through stage door at all is incredible. Sending nothing but love 💜
I felt guilty going to stage door and left after a couple of minutes. Basically, I thought since there were a couple of dozen people there already, what if Carrie just wants to go home and have a snooze or something? I'll save the greet for the next book tour.
I think it's good that you tell us when you're uncomfortable with certain situations, especially when it's one of those things that "ordinary people" might not think about. It wasn't what I expected, clicking on the video title, but I'm glad you made it :)
Carrie. You do not have to apologise. You are human. Of course there are days that you're not feeling well or day that you have work to do and etc. It's also normal that you don't like being manhandled and what not (let's be honest. Who would?). I live in Belgium. So it's very hard for me to come watch a show. Or attend a signing. So I just think people should be grateful for seeing you in the first place. We love you Carrie. And we all just want you to be happy! ❤️.
Did anyone else notice how close Carrie is to tears in this video? Like, you can tell this really affects her, yet she has guilt bringing it up? Carrie, you say you are here for us and I'm sure 98% of us are here for you. We love you and you have nothing to feel guilty about
Oh carrie, thats so horrible :( you should never apologise for being a human and having limits! that person yelling at stage door in the video I think just adds to your point. after a long day I love to pop my headphones in and I hate being stopped and asked for directions or to take photos of tourists when Im just trying to make it to my bus...I can only imagine how hard it is to leave work and be pulled and pushed and scolded...not nice at all...it's not hopeful behaviour xxx
Joy-Colleen Murphy it was staged as I was there and was the last to leave and no-one shouted at all, it was probably added in to help support the message of the video
Well she doesn't exactly say the day it was filmed, I'm not sure how you can be certain that this was filmed the day you saw her. I don't think this was staged, she's an intelligent woman and that would make her point less credible. Is it possible you saw her on a different day than the one she filmed this on? I don't want to start a fuss or argument.
Joy-Colleen Murphy no its not starting a fuss don't worry and I'm not trying to b mean to Carrie as I do enjoy her videos. I met the man who played one of the two English spy's and the girls asked if Carrie was coming out and he said no cos she's filming a video. I woke up the next morning and this video was uploaded.
She could have been filming an outro for a weekly video or editing another video, it takes a while to edit videos. I doubt she got this entire video filmed/edited in a night, rendered and uploaded in time for the morning. It's not some crazy conspiracy, I'm also not one of those people who thinks anyone I'm subscribed to can do no wrong, I just think you might be mistaken.
The way that many people react, even if they are crazed fans, is just unfathomable. As an audience member, theatre has given me so much happiness and distraction in the past that I feel so grateful to the actors and it is nice if you can tell them that but you gotta respect them, acting can be so tiring and mentally draining and you don't know what's going on in the actors/actresses' lives. Stage door is not an obligation, you don't have to say sorry if you're not there once in a while.
Carrie, I am so sorry that people in our community have done these things to you. That is unacceptable and you have nothing to apologize for. As for everyone else that reads this comment, guys, we need to be nice. As a part of the hopeful community we should all strive to be nice and respectful and that especially includes Carrie. We cannot hurt our big sister guys! She has always been here for us and we have to be here for her too. We cannot let these things continue. If you see anyone at Stage Door or online doing anything not nice, please, you know, tell them off, but politely. We need to stick together as a community and that includes self-policing. We need to stick together guys. Be polite please and respect Carrie's wishes and her free will as a person. Thanks. :)
I met you at stage door in February 2014 after a matinee performance of Les Mis. It was SUCH a treat to even be there - I had come on a trip with my boyfriend, we made time to see the show because it's my favourite one, I've seen it a few times in the West End and I want him to love it as much as I do (he now does!). When we came out after, I was already crying from the emotion of the show, and we rushed round to stage door half expecting not to even see you. But you were there, and it felt like such a privilege to meet you, and you were so gracious and kind and you spoke to us and hugged me for a photo. And you didn't have to do any of that. And that's something a lot of people need to understand before they go to a show of yours, even if it's just to see you and not particularly to go for love of the show itself. The treat is to see you doing what you do best. Thank you for being there when I was, but please know that we never felt like you had to be. All the love xxx
People expect too much these days. It's called being grateful for the experiences you do get and not assuming you automatically deserve to see someone. I can't imagine having anyone do any of those things.
Carrie I'm so glad that you've been able to make this video. I cannot believe that you've been treated that way in the past! If anything its the people looking through your things/pulling your hair that are being disrespectful not you at all! As a student nurse I've been bitten, scratched, kicked and taken abuse so I understand what its like to an extent trying to be kind to people who do not treat you as you'd like to be treated. it's especially difficult after a long day! I'm so sorry that some people think its okay to have done this to you, it's completely not. And you shouldn't feel bad for asking respect and a bit of normality! Sending love xxx
I promise not everyone in Plymouth will act like this and I hope it doesn't change your opinion on the beautiful city which I call home. I currently live opposite the theatre and every time I get the courage to walk over the road to meet you, I get a horrible anxiety attack. So in a way I guess it's a good thing because I don't want to add to your stress. I hope you're enjoying Plymouth and I hope you come back so I can stop being a bum and actually meet you! X
***** thank you so much! Mine has improved a great deal but things have been stressful lately which has made it worse I guess. I hope you continue fighting too! X
Guys i just met her! I was walking past with my friend who pretty much forced me down the stairs as i was shaking. Carrie you're lovely and made me feel very calm! X
It breaks my heart that you feel like you should apologize. You're asking for common courtesy and basic respect. I'M sorry that people can be a-holes and not realize these things.
You're way too tolerant and kind. Seriously the behaviour you mentioned is not acceptable ever. You need to be more stern with people, make it clear that it is NOT ok for a stranger to touch you or take your belongings. And to anyone who's rude at stage door, take a moment to think about what you're doing/saying and use your brain to figure out whether or not it's appropriate. You may feel like you know Carrie because of her videos but she doesn't know you, you're literally a stranger. Think how you would feel if a stranger touched you without asking.
Thank you for being you. Thank you for giving us so many opportunities to meet you and thank you for being so kind and generous with your time and talents. You are INCREDIBLE and I wish you didn't have to give your audience these reminders but I'm grateful you are brave enough to do so. You inspire. Thank you for having courage and being kind, Carrie ❤️
Don't feel bad about posting this. In general, the entitlement culture in our society has gotten out of hand. People feel entitled to all sorts of things from other people just because they are fans of them. Artists/performers etc do not owe anyone anything just because you watch someone's videos, or buy their cd, or go their live show. If someone thinks they're owed something by someone else(like their time or a photo or a chat or whatever it is they think they deserve from someone) they're the ones who are in the wrong. And it is terrible that the person on the other side has to be made to feel bad for someone else's entitled behavior. So never feel bad about missing stage door or not giving someone a photo or not talking to them (even if the reason you didn't is just because you didn't want to or didn't feel like it...you are allowed that). I don't know what we can do as a society to change the mindset that has made people think they deserve more from artists, but it needs to change. It is a very dangerous mindset that is damaging all around.
I remember 3 years ago going to London for the first time and seeing you in Les Mis and being more grateful than anything to watch you do the thing you love. I remember walking by stage door and considered waiting but by then the crowd was getting large and it was late so I decided to pass it up and get to the tube before it closed/so I could wander my way alone back to my hostel. I hope one day to meet you but not in a crazy or hectic or anxious way. Until then, thank you for everything you do. I really appreciate it.
No one has the right to touch you EVER. How selfish, rude and disrespectful of them to be so demanding. I am glad you made this video and disappointed that Hopefuls act this way. You should name and shame the tweets that say these things too.
I met you a few years back at Les Mis stage door. It was my first ever time at a stage door, I was in London on my own and I was so scared of someone thinking I was annoying and in the way but you were so nice and it calmed me right down. I'm very thankful and grateful for the time you shared with me. Anyone who oversteps boundaries and disrespects actors and performers should be ashamed of themselves because you owe them nothing.
In the description you say you felt bad for uploading this. Can I just ask why? All you have done is ask that people treat you with the respect that you and anyone else deserves. I see no wrong in that. Stay strong, we all love you Xxx
She probably feels mean that she meets some people and not others? I don't know, I think she has nothing to apologise for, and she deserves repsect as much as anybody else :) x
I was at stage door after one of your les mis shows; we watched you look out the dressing room window before leaving, and you never came out. And we totally understood. It was throwing it down with rain, and there were masses of people, and the ones who really care about you will be understanding and forgiving. Much love
I hate the fact that you feel like you have to apologize for wanting to be treated like a human being. You don't have to apologize at all, and you don't have to feel guilty about this. You haven't done anything wrong. I hope the people who do this see this video so that they can get their shit together and stop.
Don't let people get you down Carrie ,i would love to see people who believe that actors don't work hard to be in a show and see how difficult working in this industry is, weather it is getting bad reviews or comments on line or working unsociable hours. Doing crazy dance rehearsals or crazy vocal warm ups performing 8 sometimes more shows a week it is an incredibly difficult job. To the people who believe that acting and working in the film, television or theater industry is a joke or playing around I say lets see you do it. Thanks for making this video Carrie I love watching your videos they make me smile everyday. ✨
Honestly people should be grateful just to be able to see the show. There are many of us that can't even do that because we live in another country or can't afford it. Meeting you is an extra plus.
Oh Carrie :'( you big hearted wonderful human I just want to wrap you in bubble wrap so you're never hurt. Please do whatever makes you feel happiest!
love you Dodie!!💕😊
I agree Dods 💕
Love you Dodie❤️
I agree, one hundred percent. We're always here for you Carrie 💜💜
I totally agree, Dodie! Well said 👌👍💕
Love you and Carrie xxx
Before I go to bed, I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who's been so ridiculously lovely and supported me with this kerfuffle. I was so nervous about uploading this video but knew if I didn't, every time something else bad happened at stage door I'd keep quiet, go home crying and my spirit would break a little more. I know I was right to address it but I still want to say sorry. For sounding ungrateful for the love and support you guys give me every day and for sticking with me, some of you, for years. I'm not ungrateful at all. Not even a little bit and I wish there was a better way to address this without it sounding like "Woe is me! I'm so popular and it's so hard having everyone love me all at once!". So I'm truly sorry for that and from the comments the majority understand that this isn't a case of me being precious but just that no one wants to be shouted at, have their hair pulled or their belongings rooted through or taken when they're leaving work, no matter what profession you're in. And in light of the tragic event of Christina Grime having her life taken at a meet and greet after a concert, although no where near her unbelievable standard of talent or following, I'm still currently erring on the side of caution.
Thank you for being incredible.
xxx
Carrie you don't sound like 'woe is me' people should be more respectful of your personal boundaries especially when it comes to the physically things like following you for taking your stuff, but should also be respectful of how you feel mentally towards everything that happens.... We love you Carrie. I can't wait to hopefully meet you in London at stage door to personally tell you how much I admire you. And just to even be able to tell you that would be a dream come true
You shouldn't feel guilty at all, it's not your fault and you shouldn't think you have to go at stage door to please everyone. People just need to be comprehensive and respectful, they should put themselves in your shoes for just a minute and see everything that's going on. Have a lovely night and continue doing what you're doing Carrie, you're doing and excellent job. xx
Your health and safety come first so don't ever feel guilty about putting them first. Sweet dreams!
Carrie. It is OKAY. It is okay for you to tell us. And It is okay for you not eanting to go to stage door when you dont feel like it.
What it's NOT okay is that you feel guilty when you dont go to stage door. The people that dont understand that are the people who DONT deserve your worries. so dont.
we love you, and we understand you. And you work alctually work R E A L L Y hard on everything. and thay everything is a hole lot!!! You are doing great, and we could be happier (could we?) couldnt be happieeeer. right dear?
GOOD night Carrie!!
Dear girl, sleep! I can actually understand how you feel.
These moments will come and go, I certainly guarantee. Yes, I know you know this, :) but I thought to remind you anyhoo.
You are amazing, the fact you put your heart on your sleeve and are truly (he!) yourself, is in a way, wonderfully brave. Yet you have nothing to hide! Which others may, (as you know) unintentionally take advantage of, however, that doesn't stop you being you. Thank Moaf. (Mother Of All Fairies)
Never stop being kind! To others or ESPECIALLY yourself! How can you help others or cheer others up or have fun when you too, need some looking after. You have to be your own best friend as well, listen to yourself and your body, we can all be a bit like Alice in Wonderland, "I give myself very good advice, But I very seldom follow it". I am DEFINITELY like dear Alice.
I am very happy you have addressed this problem, as this is something which needs some understanding/explaining! I have worked in theatre (mainly amateur) most of my life, and certain things even WE wouldn't find acceptable even when we are being lenient, there is a time where we have to say "STOP," enough is enough.
In your position you have every right to make such a video, and I proud that someone like you, who I believe to be such a brilliant influence, young or old (I'm in the Older sector. *waves*), this is so so important. Not only is this about you, this is about other's who work in theatres across the world.
You are as real as everyone else, and when you need time for yourself, you should be able to do so.
Also, the Stage Door, is a FIRE EXIT too, for health and safety reasons people are IN THE WAY... Sorry, "cap lock".
I know you know your followers and fans love you greatly, and thank Moaf, they are understanding. And this should also open some mind and thoughts about form of etiquette. (Etiquette? I think that's the right word.)
Okay, I have babbled enough to you dear one. Sorry! If you see this, I hope this made SOME form of sense to you. I send my love and hugs and all the support the universe can send for me to you.
Sleep well as much as you can! OKAY I'M GOING!!. (Sorry.)
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I love you... that is all. Xxxx
you two are cuuuuute
cute :3
love how you are so close
Love you too, Gi.
Every time she apologizes it just hurts me. Making your safety a priority is not moaning and it's not something to be sorry for. Everyone feeling entitled to a meet and greet at stage door are the ones moaning. People need to learn some basic respect.
I want to cry. This is so shitty. How could anybody think this is okay like wtf. People need to calm down. You're overreacting at all. You need to stop putting stranger's happiness before your happiness Carrie. If you need to take a break your real audience who actually cares about you will support it. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this bc nobody should. There's no reason for it and it's very sad.
*You're not overreacting at all. Of course I forget the most important word in the sentence
I know!! It's terrible that Carrie feels like this, I honestly cannot imagine what it would feel like to be bullied in that way xx
AMEN!!
Well said
Seeing and hearing her being on the brink of tears throughout this entire video is so heartbreaking.
I feel so incredibly awful that it was my mum that cued this. You're never obliged to meet anyone after or before a show and it's an extra privilege if we do get to. Shows are super tiring (I get that, I do them and not even to the extent you do!) and especially after a 13 hour day I understand completely. Thank you for speaking about this though, I know you're worried about it but we will always support you and be as respectful as possible towards you and any other member of the cast/theatre
Oh no please don't think it was your mum that caused this video! It's been an on going thing for close to three years now and I've been wanting to say something for a long while. I started scripting this video when someone tried to kiss me at stage door the other week. That was a big line that got crossed and I went home and cried and it's just taken me a while to actually make it. Your mum just wanted us to meet and that's really lovely. Her intentions were good! :) xxx
+ItsWayPastMyBedTime Thank you for understanding what was meant! Watching this video was actually heartbreaking because some people just don't understand that you work so hard and that you have barely any time to yourself to just take a break. I'm so sorry that your had to go through this, you should never have to experience these things. On a rather topical note, thank you for coming out stage door tonight! There was a huge amount of people so thank you for being so lovely and calm, it was truly lovely to meet you (pardon the pun!) xx
Very well said. Unbelievable how some people are.
I met you two years ago at the Les Mis stage door with my sister and little cousin. That day you had an interview after the matinee performance and tweeted that you couldn't come to stage door, my sister was disappointed but myself and my mum explained to her that you had other responsibilities and she understood immediately. We were fortunate enough that after the show we were getting drinks at a pub just round the corner and as we stood and chatted, myself and my sister with bubble tea, we caught a glimpse of your hair. And my sister was so excited. You, even after doing an interview, stayed to meet the very few people that were still waiting at stage door hours after the show to meet you. And you made our day, you were more than happy to take photos and have a chat. You were so so sweet to my little cousin who was shy but you got down on your knees to be at her level and talked to her, complimented her flower crown and thanked her for coming to the show. I am so grateful for that X
Let me start off by saying I'm a hopeful old enough to be your Mum. Here's what I'm thinking, purely 30 seconds after watching this video. Just because you are a "well known" face, does not, and definitely should not mean that your privacy and right to personal space needs to be secondary in your thoughts.
As wonderful as social media is, it can give a minority of the viewers a belief that they "know you" like they would a friend.
You give so much of your actual time, your thinking time, and most of all your very honest and kind heart to your fans, the time and space you keep for yourself is not only perfectly natural, but necessarily essential...Always remember you are wonderfully lovely, and loved, in a week where horrible things have happened to wonderful people just going about their day this is more important than ever. It is 3000% right to put yourself and your needs (for any reason you have at all, no excuses needed) first.
Much love. xx
There is absolutely no need for you to apologise, darling. The only people who need to say sorry are the ones who feel entitled to treat you so horribly and impersonally - it boggles me sideways how anyone can have such a lack of respect for a fellow human being. Your safety, comfort, and wellbeing are absolutely what you should prioritise, and you do not have to feel guilty for putting yourself before other people's feelings (easier said than done, I know!)
I'm sorry that you've had to have those bad experiences, and I hope people will be more respectful of you from now on.
Lots of love and hugs xx
I agree :) xx
I completely agree. I also love the phrase 'boggles me sideways' xx
I wanted to say something along that lines, but didn't know how to say it. You put it in words perfectly! (is that proper English I have no clue xD)
santje98 Yes, perfect English! :) x
+Katie Bates awh yeah B)
do not apologize for asking for basic respect of human boundaries. we should be apologizing to you. love you carrie
Me and my friend went to stage door after seeing Chitty in Newcastle on a Wednesday night. We were the 2nd people there and we kept getting shoved out of the way by people trying to get to the front :( like I know people are eager to meet Carrie because of how exciting it is but it was quite disrespectful. We were very grateful to meet Carrie and chat with her for a while but we didn't assume that she would come out, we said that we'd go to stage door afterwards and if she was there then great, but if not then it would be a shame but it would be completely understandable. It upsets me how continuously apologetic Carrie is in this video because she has nothing to be sorry for, and it's awful that people have (perhaps unintentionally) guilt-tripped her for not being somewhere she isn't obliged to be.
were you there the first Wednesday it started ?? it was crazy people were huddled so close to the door and just shoving each other i just stayed well away and just watched from the back did try to see what was going on but was shoved away or stud in front of so sad things like that happens to Carrie she does not deserve it after the amazing shows she does
+Eilidh Bellis yeah we were, it was insane! I couldn't believe how tightly packed everyone was. Despite the chaos it was amazing to meet all the lovely hopefuls and fans of the show. The amount of amazing and kind people definitely outweighed the people pushing and shoving!
+Charlotte Marshall same here, I know amazing how people could move! oh yes definitely worth it saw the cutest smiles of the younger fans/hopefuls glad you enjoyed it too :)
+Eilidh Bellis There was this little boy, maybe 7 or 8 and he was like "you were amazing as Truly Scrumptious you're a really good actress!" And it was so cute!! Carrie came to me and my friend after he said that but we were just all in awe at how adorable he was
awwww cute wish i had saw that!
That knobhead at 4:00 though. So sorry you have to go through that appalling behaviour
you shouldn't be worried about making this post public. honestly carrie, you do not own anyone anything, you do not deserve people being mad at you because YOU are just a person trying to get on with their job and day. we love you and we will ALWAYS support you no matter what. i hope you're okay Carrie xxx
That's really lovely. Thank you. xxx
That person who yelled while you were filming this was scary. That was honestly scary as hell. I am so sorry that you are afraid to leave a building that you work in, with good reason. That's awful Carrie. I really hope the people who come to see you calm way down, you don't have to feel bad that you can't always come to stage door especially considering that there are some crazy aggressive people out there. I hope you can feel safe again soon :(
Stage door etiquette is so important!!! I am so sorry that people are forgetting that :(
Actors stopping to sign and meet people at stage door is not a requirement. Its a privilege for us fans and we should be respectful and thankful for that privilege.
Carrie you are just a human being, like the rest of us. You don't need to feel bad about posting this. You deserve respect and its completely okay to spell out your thoughts and comfort level. I hope people take this video to heart and remember to think about their actions and words at stage door, and just everywhere else in general.
Carrie, please don't apologize. This is not just a video about you moaning, this is you taking care of yourself. Self-care is so important and I'm really sorry you've had such awful experiences before. I'm certainly not as known as you but I've had long hair all my life and have had people touch it, or me, without asking before and I've also had people complain afterwards because I ducked away from their hand or told them not to.
Please don't feel guilty because you're telling people to treat you like a human being because that's something that they should be doing anyway.
Sending love.
Carrie, never ever apologise for calling people out like this. Your dedication to your craft is a huge inspiration, and you have every right to be respected and treated fairly! It saddens me every time I see a tweet from someone who feels entitled to meet you, regardless of your personal circumstances. I hope the situation sorts itself out - anxiety is a pretty shitty thing that I wouldn't wish on anyone xxxx
Well said :) xx
+Katie Bates thank you :)
Isobel F No problem, the goal of the Hopeful community is to stay happy, and if we can help Carrie to be happy then we're awesome :) xx
+Katie Bates I couldn't agree more x
Isobel F Yay! I honestly love being part of such a kind community who support each other, and that's all thanks to Carrie. She owes us nothing at all. :) x
That is definitely not good Hopeful behavior. This community is lovely and kind and understanding. Maybe those people need to be given a pinky reminder to be kind to others!
What the hell is this world coming to? It's really difficult not to be disheartened when hearing something like this. People these days don't know how to behave properly. Treat others the way you want to be treated!
Exactly!! Who on earth would rummage through somebody else's bag?! :)
I feel like, unfortunately, it is culturally popular to be mean to someone. I am not talking about just events happening at Stage Door (though it is included) but if you ever have a differing opinion of someone, people don't respect that you have differing opinions and this is where this cultural bullying has started. What we need in this world is a new revolution that says BE Respectful!
I thought the title said "Stage door cat" and honestly I'm a little disappointed
But seriously this is a very important subject and well done for sharing xx
You don't need to be sorry for uploading this, you're not being offensive or rude in any way at all. You've been incredibly respectful, even when you have cause not to be. Not too long ago, a man grabbed my arm in the street and was trying to get me to go with him, so I know how scary it can be. No one should be touched if they don't want to be, so I sympathise a lot. I hope that this makes people think twice about their behaviour at theatres. Most importantly, I hope these experiences don't put you off living your life as you want to, Carrie. Nothing in this world is worth losing your mind over. Take a deep breath, tell your feelings of anxiety that they can't win and live as you want to. That's what I do, even if it is tough. x
I completely agree. I felt terrible after watching this, especially because she apologized for asking people to stop treating her like public property...
***** I'm fine, thank you. Reading this back I think I made it sound way worse than it actually was. :P He didn't hurt me or anything, he just put his hand on my arm and was saying how he wanted to 'get to know me' and then whether I would get in his car. I just told him to leave me alone and walked away very quickly. It freaked me out a bit but other people have way worse experiences. I appreciate you asking though, I
hope you're well. xx
You should not be ashamed in anyway for having to make a video asking people to be people. What some people do is so disrespectful and damn right you should tell them. It's not your fault! Xx
Well said! :D
Amen!!!
I've met you at various stage doors now and every single time I take the time to thank you for your time because THAT is what we should do. That is MY place at a stage door to thank you and every other performer in the show who is okay with stopping to talk to a stranger for the two hours you just gave us and worked your arse off for. I've seen rude people at stage door, Newcastle Theatre Royal for Chitty (it was the saturday evening of the first week) was the most recent and I was so upset that I ranted my entire way home about the amount of disrespect I saw from one person. The only reason I went to stage door that day was to thank the performers who had put a massive smile on my face during quite a difficult week. I thanked you and told you the truth (which was that your doll on a music box was beautiful) and let you go on your way. I missed Lee, I saw him leaving but he was in a hurry and I saw people running after him and all I could do was roll my eyes. I was excited to see him but it is not place to get in the way of someone elses day. I DID go to twitter the next day and say that I had missed him but I understood why and did my thanking there. Performers do not owe anyone anything, they are not toys - they're people. I'm sorry that you feel like you have to make this point over and over again and I'm sorry that some people aren't capable of decent interactions with you. I hope you know you don't owe anyone anything other than working your butt off on the stage, that is your job and you are damn good at it. Hearing what you've been through makes me so angry (and if you ever need a body guard just let me know ;) ). I hope you are okay Carrie xxx
Just as an addition to this, one thing I saw at the same stage door at Chitty was grown adults pushing in front of children. Young kids being pushing out of the way or cut in front of. There was a blind girl who must have been about 12 or 13 at stage door that night and I saw a grown man push straight in front of her knocking her off balance. It's terrible how people think this is an appropriate way to behave.
I'm not sure those people deserve to be called adults, because their maturity level does not seem to be what I've come to expect of adults.
That is utterly terrible. I cannot belie how some people act sometimes. It unnerves me so much.
Right?! I was SO angry.
Rachael Millmoor As well you should be!
I'm heartbroken to see you treating this matter on a video. That's just stuff you don't even need to ask, it's just about having manners and being polite and care about others beside yourself. Unbelievable it has to be said.
(Sad to say: don't ever come to Brazil. For me it's hard to imagine a more respectful people than English people and these horrible acts you describe happen all the time in Brazil with famous people. With women, especially.)
Quando eu estava vendo esse vídeo, foi um dos primeiros pensamentos que tive, sobre a situção dos fãs com pessoas famosas aqui. Triste :(
I think there's a huge different between genuine Hopefuls and just fans of yours. The difference being that us Hopefuls completely understand that you are a human, not a machine, and that you can't do absolutely everything for each and every one of us. You do so much for us as it is, that you really shouldn't be 'required' to be at stage door. You work so hard and deserve all the breaks you need - and Hopefuls should (hopefully ;) ) understand that.
I saw Les Mis and didn't meet you there, but I met you at SITC '13, and I don't support you any less, just because you weren't at stage door that night!
You have captured an important difference between being a fan and being a brother or sister.
Preach!! :) xx
YESSS :))
If you don't agree with this statement you don't deserve to be a fan of Carrie as she puts so much into these videos and you all need to respect that
Thank you Carrie you're amazing xxxx
tthhhhiiissss
I went to see you at the Nottingham show and I wondered if it would be okay to meet you at the stage door, I had heard stories about how it's not acceptable to invade someone's space after they have just done a massive performance. I noticed there were a lot of other people waiting for you, so I thought it would be okay. When I met you, you were the most amazing sweet person and even though I pretty much froze up, we still had a picture and I asked to hug you, you didn't have to and you did. You don't have to do any of it and you do, you treat us like we're your friends, but don't let that guilt trip you, I can't imagine what it must be like to have to go through an exhausting performance to then have to meet lots of us back stage when all you want to do is go home and have a cup of tea. So please Carrie put yourself first because as long as you're happy, we will be too xxxxx
i met you at Newcastle with my friend Marie and there were some lovely people like one said oh those girls can go before us because they've been longer and that was lovely but i could tell some people were being slightly harsh and ITS TOTALLY UNNECESSARY. You are one of the most utterly brilliant people out there and we were so shocked that you did come out!! at the end of the day you are a human who deserves just as much respect as the next person; Carrie if its getting too bad do not feel guilty; the people complaining are probably the ones who do all the horrible stuff; they don't count, focus on the people who genuinely love and care for you💗.
i felt the same way at Newcastle on the first day it was there was quite scared and anxious (which i weirdly told Carrie when she nicely hugged me )i stayed right at the back and literally just wait for her to approach me first,so sad things like that happens to Carrie she does not deserve it after the amazing shows she does
+Eilidh Bellis same!! we waited till near the very end until she said hello to us! x
its was crazy! lee mead and Andy Hockley (the man that played grandpa) came out and no one batted a eye lid they were all huddled screaming next to the door! x
+Eilidh Bellis I WANTED TO SEE LEE OMG
+catherine parker i know! x
Slight change of subject but your mug is great.
Thank you! A friend gave it to me in Newcastle! xxx
I've decided I definitely need some sassier mugs... ps. thanks for the video, really thought provoking xx
Was just about to ask if it was from Newcastle, as I've grown up with that phrase! 😉
I met you in London a couple of years ago before seeing Les Mis. I always felt bad because I saw you and stopped you in the street when you were having your own personal time. I was forever grateful that you stopped for a chat and a photo though. I met you again the other week in Newcastle after seeing Chitty and you were still so humble :) Ignore the people who treat you like crap Carrie! We love you
Yes!! Well said :) xx She doesn't owe anybody anything at all x
This video popped up today. I clicked it, thinking 'oh, I should know this in case of meeting her someday. I might make her uncomfortable.' and watching it, "WHAT THE *UCK?????" how can people like that be your fans, be Carrie's fan?? I am so shocked. Though this is years ago I still can't believe those people really existed or exist.
All of your worries are completely valid and you don't owe anyone anything, if you don't want to go out stage door, then by all means don't and stay happy and safe!
I couldn't agree more with this.
Exactly xx
Never ever apologise Carrie, I've seen how mental it can get a various stage doors (I work in theatre too) and it can get really overwhelming and a bit panic inducing, especially if you're just trying to get through. Keep your chin up lovely lady! xxx
Stage door would give me so much anxiety too if I was in your position. I know with the job I have now all I want to do after work is go home quickly and quietly. You're so awesome and I am 100% positive that anyone who truly is a "fan" of yours will respect you and your thoughts on this. Your metal health and safety is far more important. sending lots of love!!
That's absolutely terrible, no one deserves to be treated like this, especially not you. They should be the ones apologizing. I can't even believe that as soon as someone becomes somewhat famous they are treated like playthings... Stay strong Carrie ❤️
Darling you don't need to be sorry for speaking your mind. There is a quote that I love, I can't remember who said it but it goes like this; "The truth is always okay to say. It's how people react to the truth, that may cause a problem." Your feelings are valid, you are allowed to feel them and to express them as long as you do it in a respectful manner. Which I feel you did! I know what it's like to have social anxiety and it's NOT fun. I hope you can get past this, and I hope people respect you enough to stop with the negativity. Love you and STAY STRONG!
Everything I wanted to say after watching this video, has already been summed up by lovely people in the comments. You don't need to apologise Carrie, not at all. Do what makes you happy and only do what you feel comfortable doing xx
If you're at stage door before or after the matinee performance tomorrow, I'm going to give you a massive hug even though you have no clue who I am - you make me feel like more than a fan, but a friend. A friend who you support through everything, a friend who you allow to dream as much as they want because you know that if they dream hard enough, and are motivated, they can do anything. You're my favourite UA-camr, singer, actress, etc.. for a reason. You're so gorgeous, wonderful and your personality is one that I could only dream of having. As a aspiring theatre actress, I know the stress and craziness of preforming on stage and I'm only 15 and in school still. Look, Carrie, if I could give you a massive hug now. Please don't be afraid of making this public - you have the RIGHT to do just that, and people who maybe don't follow you on Twitter, or have your notifications on, won't see this, meaning nothing will change inside them - you're strong, Carrie. If you're uncomfortable +
+ making it public then don't, but if something inside you is telling you to make it public than I think you should, but only do what makes you happiest. Trust me, your anxiety is valid and you're allowed to feel this way. As much as I want to meet you, if you don't come to stage door before or after the matinee in Plymouth tomorrow I won't mind because it's ALL OKAY, but if you do please know you're gonna get the biggest, warmest hug! I am so excited to see you in Chitty tomorrow, thank you for being such a wonderful, supportive person - you never fail to make me smile. I love you. Xoxox -River (@cinderiver)
I know you mean well and your comment is lovely, but the fact that despite everything she just said about being touched by strangers you just said you were going to find her and hug her makes me think you missed the point a little bit. By all means say hello, but please never, ever, ever touch anyone in any way without their spoken consent first.
+Sawyer W. That's what I was thinking lol, no wonder Carrie doesn't come outside if even after this video people still say they're going to give her hugs...
+Pinkylou123 oh, no, I'd ask her first! I'm not that bad..
+Cinderiver Okay! Just checking, sorry if I was being a little sensitive
this still angers me so much. what infuriates me even more is that you feel the need to say sorry! I've seen some of the horrific abuse tweeted at you, especially from ungrateful childrens parents, thats damm right shameful and they should be cautioned for abuse imo.
I went to see Kit Harington in Doctor Faustus (amazing btw) the other week and afterwards we saw him at stage door, he was very gracious about signing things and photos etc, but the whole time there was a bodyguard there making sure that everyone stayed a certain way away and stopping people from getting too in Kit's face and after a certain period of time he encouraged Kit to just go home in the car that was waiting for him, and everyone accepted that. Do you have any sort of security or personnel protecting you? Because without that guard, I'm sure many of the people in that crowd could have turned quite nasty quite quickly, and that terrifies me.
I don't remember there being anyone whose specific responsibility was the safety of the actors who chose to linger at stage door (in my case, just Carrie, as the others who came out seemed to be in a hurry to get home) when I met Carrie there, but it would be a good idea, especially in casts with exceptionally well-known actors. Harrington is an example of someone who is well-known _far_ beyond the crowd who typically go and see a Marlowe play, though.
i was thinking the same thing at Newcastle but i asked my dad (he's a security guard ) when he picked me up he said he could see security standing near but don't think they did a good job of keeping things clear
I was at Faustus Wednesday night - the crowd was so pushy (and huge), it was quite alarming, and Kit actually went back inside after about 5 minutes, left by another exit and then got in a car discreetly (although an autograph hunter guy did chase him).
Please don't feel the need to apologize for speaking out against something that makes you feel uncomfortable, unsafe, or unhappy! You are a wonderful human being who deserves respect and time alone as much as the next person!
You have nothing to be sorry for! Many of us understand that the whole Stage Door system is a relaxed, pressure-less, if-it-happens-it-happens deal. I'm sorry you have to go through some of those terrible things- I hope it makes you feel better knowing that the majority of us are just super grateful for letting us share in your life and success and watch you do what you do so positively and brilliantly! I'm looking forward to seeing you in Chitty in not too long, and I may come to stage door, but I don't have any expectations or demands- it's enough of a treat watching you on that stage, as it was with Les Mis! (Also actually coming to your book signing the day before- can't wait to meet you!) All the love xxxx
Haha lucky you!! :) xx She's even more lovely in real life x
No need to apologize even once Carrie! You are completely in the right her. If people aren't treating you respectfully, you have no obligation to come and meet people if you are going to feel anxious about being manhandled!! Lots of love from Canada
I am coming to watch Chitty when you come to the Marlowe. I am hoping to go go to stage door to congratulate you, if not I wont be disappointed or hurt, at the end of the day I am there to watch a show that I love and enjoy the experience of watching the very first show I watched on WestEnd (I saw it when you were playing Jemima) Wish you and the rest of the cast the best of luck during the rest of the tour and can't wait to see you perform as Truly!
I saw her and she was amazing!! I'm sure you'll love it as much as i did!! Enjoy :) x
Carrie, this is one of the many reasons why I have followed you for so many years. Your wisdom and honesty is so spot-on (this is coming from a fellow actor, singer & writer two years your elder). I wish the world were full of more people like you! You're awesome.
I was actually at stage door whilst you were recording this video! However I so understand how you must be feeling and would never want you to feel dissapointed! I was so grateful to watch the show, which by the way was so wonderful and I had a lovely time. Yes, it was a little upsetting but you are human, and the life you are living is already so jam packed! you should never feel obliged to do something because people are making you feel bad. I waited to just to say Hello and let you know How wonderful you are, but even though you didn't come, I don't regret waiting because i caught a great sun tan and I met Barry from Eastenders!!! How can I complain about that! You are so wonderful and never let people make you feel bad because of that! p.s I left my letter with the stage man so I do hope you got it! :) well done on the amazing show, can't wait to see what you do next! x
who was the guy that was shouting?
+Emma Webb there were only three girls stood outside, and it wasn't any of us. It must of come from a different direction :(
So sad about people being mean to you when you don't stage door and attack you when you do. Here in NYC, sometimes actors who can't stage door actually Pre-sign the programs for the audience so they don't leave empty handed. When I saw Cabaret with Alan Cumming, he did that. Ramin Karimloo did it as well with Les Miz on Broadway and even tweets SORRY NO STAGE DOOR TONIGHT. LOVE YOU ALL WHO CAME TO THE SHOW.
if you need anything, you'll always have the love we give you here on UA-cam Love you Carrie.
Why did it take you so long to make this video? it's horrific what you had to go through!
Usually I'll tweet something like "please be respectful blah blah blah" when it happens and a few have said I'm moaning for the sake of it and I should be grateful people are there at all. So I thought making a video would be worse. But now I'm just kinda sad and worn out and just felt I had to say something. xxx
I understand that you're trying not to offend your fans, but those who really love you and care about you should know that safety comes first. Glad you're okay and please be careful in the future. Love ya :) xoxo
Don't feel bad about saying something like this
Calling you disrespectful for not showing up at Stage Door is literally the worst. I can't believe people have been treating you this way, seriously, I just can't understand how someone would just grab you or your stuff without even asking and even if they asked, how weird would that be?! I'm sososo sorry, that people do this weird stuff.
"Stagedooring" is a bit different where I live, I guess. I'm in Austria and we do have two very popular theatres and many german speaking actors who are more or less regularly here (Anton Zetterholm was here for example :3) and we have our own kind of "stage door culture" here. But the one thing we ALL agree on, whether we're hard core fans and have seen the show 3739362x, or a fan who's at SD the first time ever, we ALL respect the actors. We don't usually touch them without asking (there are always exceptions, mostly teenage girls who probably just don't know better) and we all let actors pass if we know they're tired or just having a bad day.
I guess what I'm trying to say is (before I ran out of space) is, that you're in no way obliged to do what those people want you to do if you do not feel comfortable with it. Please do tell them no! They might just not know any better and if you say "Sorry, but no, I don't want to hug you/give you my phone/let you touch my hair." they may learn from it.
I really hope you'll feel less anxious over time. When I met you at SD at Les Mis it was such a wonderful experience and I would love one day to meet you again. I hope those people won't ruin the experience for you, lovely. Stay strong, say no if you need to & we all love you! You're such an inspiration and you definitely don't disappoint us! We all understand! xxx
Carrie you angel, you are a blessing and a HUMAN
I agree so much with this :D xx
Never apologize for prioritizing your safety. The people who are upset by you not being there to the point where they send angry tweets are the types of people who may also think it's okay to be disrepectful to you in person. Just like you say, a ticket doesn't grant you a signing as well, it's a bonus if it happens.
People act like this? The world is so gross. I would consider it an honor to even see you perform. You don't owe anyone anything. You are doing what you love and are EXTREMELY good at, and you have nothing to apologize for. You're amazing, Carrie. Try not to let anyone negate the fact that you are TRULY beautiful just because you don't grant their every wish. Hoping you stay strong.
The guy yelling in the middle of her video really bothered me..Carrie please stay safe, love.
It bothered me too...it was quite aggressive, I didn't like the sounds of him
Margaret Rose I was outside the whole time who ever shouted wasn't at stage door and wasn't shouting for Carrie to come out. Tbh in the middle of the town it could b anybody.
Margaret Rose I would have been so scared if that had happened if I was actually out there waiting!
@@jennymoffatt6223 bullshit
Carrie I just want to say thank you for coming out and being so humble and lovely and taking the time to take photos and sign my book at stage door in Sheffield. I do understand completely and you were so completely truly scrumptious and kind ❤️❤️❤️
That kind of behaviour is actually horrible. You wouldn't treat any other professional like that, and artists should be no exception. You're completely entitled to feel this way. Your safety as a performer, as well as the safety of those around you, should be paramount.
This is something that definitely needs to be talked about. I feel so sorry for you that you have to go through those scary, negative aspects of going through stage door. Some people forget that actors and performers are people and deserve to be respected. They should understand if you can't see people and they don't deserve to know your reason because it is your life and not theirs. Yes I understand peoples disappointment but that is nobodies fault. It is bound to happen. You don't deserve those messages that are designed to or will make you feel bad. I send you lots of hugs.
I don't think you come across as moaning or being ungrateful. You deserve respect and deserve to feel safe in your work
I've never commented on a video before but just want to say I have massive respect for you because standing up for yourself and other performers like that takes guts because people don't tend to take your job seriously and seem to forget that famous/well known people are humans too. I hope this message resonates with the people treating you badly and keep doing the amazing things you do X
Carrie it's not okay that you have to say sorry for asking people to be nice and respectful. as you said it's not obligatory, it's just something that you choose to do and it's completely, 100% and more than okay if for some reason you can't, reasons which are compelletely understandable. sending all the love xx (also great mug!)
That's absolutely horrible to hear Carrie. I'm so sorry that people don't have manners around you at stage door! Somehow, people seem to mix up the fact that celebrities are something more than what they are: simply normal people like us. And because of this, they forget that they need to be treated and respected in the same way. I've seen the way people are around celebrities, and it baffles me. So sorry that you have to go through this.
Really hope they realize that and that you can be comfortable again and that you have lovely experiences after this!!
I went to meet Carrie at the stage door when she was in Les Mis and I gotta agree that it gets pretty hectic with people pushing each other so I totally see her point, she is only human after all.
Aww Carrie you don't have to feel bad or guilty for anything. I think this has come across well and just shows that your a real person with real anxieties/feelings. I was the one who asked about stage door in your last live and you directed me here which I am glad you did. You do whatever is right for yourself and never let anyone make you feel bad for that. xx
There is absolutely no need at all to apologise Carrie, and it's so awful how people are behaving around you, I hope things start to improve, sending you so much love xx
You don't need to apologize, Carrie! You are an actress and that means your job is to act. Period. This is what you get paid for and everything further, including stage door, is 1. like overtime you are NOT obliged to do and 2. when you leave the theatre you are a just another Person and you can whatever you want. So nobody should make you feel guilty about needing some privacy.
I sincerely hope this video will make a difference on how you are threatened at stage door. But at the same time I feel incredibly sorry that you needed to film this video in first place.
Lots of Love💜💜💜
it's not you who should feel sorry for saying these things and uploading this video, it's the people you're talking about that should apologise for making you feel so uncomfortable. don't be sorry, Carrie, you're more than right. I hope the people who need to hear this are watching. much love to you!! :)
As a fellow performer and creative I just wanted to say I am 100% with you. I have also met you at stage door after Les Mis and I was so star struck I couldn't form words, my friend called out to you and you stopped talked and had a photo with us all. And I ridiculously offered to take the photo and someone kindly offered to take it instead. Stage door is your way in and out of work, and I know when I leave stage door (I am by no means as popular as you nor as professional and my stage door is am dram or uni) I would love to meet the people who watched me. The theatre is my safe place, and I hope that it's still yours. Like you say the bad experiences are far and few between but I hope that they do not out weigh the good experiences for you! Keep doing what you do, the world is a better place for it xox
Part of this was an indirect at me because a few months ago I asked if I could go to stage door without a ticket as I couldn't afford them at the time but I still really wanted to meet her and she replied to me on Twitter and I completely understood, but she also mentioned it in this video, and now I feel like crying. I know you probably meant me here Carrie, and I'm so sorry if it's my fault that this video came to fruition, I was just asking a question, and I totally respect you as an actor, so please don't be upset! And I'm sorry that people are so horrid to you at stage door. You don't deserve that whatsoever xxx
Aww don't feel bad because you actually asked if it would be an okay thing to do and you respected what she said when you got a reply, whereas some fans would have gone to meet her anyway or would have totally disrespected her and would have reacted to her in completely the wrong way! I'm sure it wasn't aimed at you :) x
Seriously don't worry or get upset. I really don't think this is a personal indirect at all. She literally gets 1000's of messages a week - whether tweets, emails, comments and other social etc. I think she just did this video for her personal safety in general and it was really good of her to be clear with her boundaries to the general public.
IF anything the fact you even asked is more respect than the people she is calling out for inappropriate behaviour within the video.
Sounds like you are child's play compared to some of the stuff she's had to deal with regarding this issue :) I think you are the last reason this post was put up, unless of course you took her phone x
I'm so sorry you've had to go through that - to be honest I find this absolutely outrageous. Even if you just didn't feel like going to stage door at one point for no particular reason whatsoever, people should respect that. You're a human being, not a puppet.
Oh honey, I just want to give you a big hug and make you tea now. So sorry you had to go through those things, that sucks ❤
Carrie you absolutely do not come across as moaning as the things you are describing would make almost everyone anxious or even panicked and anyone who really cares about you as a person will recognise why you made this video you are so amazing and humble and you should always know that you are fabulous.
Ok quite simply, anyone who is upset/angry/abusive towards you for not being at stage door is clearly not mature enough to recognise the reasons why. I work in theatre a lot as a musician, and I myself deal with entering/leaving through the stage door (needless to say no one ever stops me!), but so I can understand where you're coming from. As just a huge fan of theatre in general, I like to sometimes wait at stage door just for the chance to meet and thank the actors/musicians for their brilliant work. However, naturally sometimes some of the actors I'd like to have met don't come out, and you know what, a part of me is like 'oh well that's a shame', but the rest of me is like 'well that's fair enough, they've got lives to get on with'!
It's incredibly tough and unfair for you because you've got a huge youtube audience, many of whom may not be a typical theatre-goer, so they will go to stage door with the EXPECTATION of meeting you and getting a photo/autograph (whereas I for instance would go with the HOPE of meeting and thanking you).
I guess what I'm saying is I know it's hard to deal with people being disappointed and tweeting you angry messages, but you've really just got to try and not let it get to you. Because the problem isn't yours, it is theirs. 100%. So just keep doing what you're doing x
Dear Carrie,
I came here expecting a lovely, lighthearted and fun video, and I got this instead. But this is way, way more important. Thank you for explaining this to everyone. Some times people need this extra push to realize that their actions affect others. This kind of transparency and honesty is good, even though it's hard to do. So thank you. You're such a lovely and kind person in all of your videos, and it's always nice to see that this continues even when it comes to the less pleasant things. Thank you for showing us how to be gracious even when you probably don't feel like it.
Hey, I was actually outside SD while this was filmed waiting for Lee, and I just thought I'd let you know that the guy shouting from outside was actually shouting "Barry" at Shaun Williamson... Just one less thing for you to feel anxious about :)
I'm in shock right now. I cannot believe that people would be so ugly to you. I knew that stage door could be chaotic, but this? I could not have even predicted this. You deserve so much more than that. I'm disgusted by some of the things these people do, and the fact that you still go through stage door at all is incredible. Sending nothing but love 💜
I felt guilty going to stage door and left after a couple of minutes. Basically, I thought since there were a couple of dozen people there already, what if Carrie just wants to go home and have a snooze or something? I'll save the greet for the next book tour.
I think it's good that you tell us when you're uncomfortable with certain situations, especially when it's one of those things that "ordinary people" might not think about. It wasn't what I expected, clicking on the video title, but I'm glad you made it :)
Carrie.
You do not have to apologise. You are human. Of course there are days that you're not feeling well or day that you have work to do and etc. It's also normal that you don't like being manhandled and what not (let's be honest. Who would?).
I live in Belgium. So it's very hard for me to come watch a show. Or attend a signing. So I just think people should be grateful for seeing you in the first place. We love you Carrie. And we all just want you to be happy! ❤️.
Did anyone else notice how close Carrie is to tears in this video? Like, you can tell this really affects her, yet she has guilt bringing it up? Carrie, you say you are here for us and I'm sure 98% of us are here for you. We love you and you have nothing to feel guilty about
Oh carrie, thats so horrible :( you should never apologise for being a human and having limits! that person yelling at stage door in the video I think just adds to your point. after a long day I love to pop my headphones in and I hate being stopped and asked for directions or to take photos of tourists when Im just trying to make it to my bus...I can only imagine how hard it is to leave work and be pulled and pushed and scolded...not nice at all...it's not hopeful behaviour xxx
Joy-Colleen Murphy it was staged as I was there and was the last to leave and no-one shouted at all, it was probably added in to help support the message of the video
Well she doesn't exactly say the day it was filmed, I'm not sure how you can be certain that this was filmed the day you saw her. I don't think this was staged, she's an intelligent woman and that would make her point less credible. Is it possible you saw her on a different day than the one she filmed this on?
I don't want to start a fuss or argument.
Joy-Colleen Murphy no its not starting a fuss don't worry and I'm not trying to b mean to Carrie as I do enjoy her videos. I met the man who played one of the two English spy's and the girls asked if Carrie was coming out and he said no cos she's filming a video. I woke up the next morning and this video was uploaded.
She could have been filming an outro for a weekly video or editing another video, it takes a while to edit videos. I doubt she got this entire video filmed/edited in a night, rendered and uploaded in time for the morning. It's not some crazy conspiracy, I'm also not one of those people who thinks anyone I'm subscribed to can do no wrong, I just think you might be mistaken.
The way that many people react, even if they are crazed fans, is just unfathomable. As an audience member, theatre has given me so much happiness and distraction in the past that I feel so grateful to the actors and it is nice if you can tell them that but you gotta respect them, acting can be so tiring and mentally draining and you don't know what's going on in the actors/actresses' lives. Stage door is not an obligation, you don't have to say sorry if you're not there once in a while.
Carrie, I am so sorry that people in our community have done these things to you. That is unacceptable and you have nothing to apologize for. As for everyone else that reads this comment, guys, we need to be nice. As a part of the hopeful community we should all strive to be nice and respectful and that especially includes Carrie. We cannot hurt our big sister guys! She has always been here for us and we have to be here for her too. We cannot let these things continue. If you see anyone at Stage Door or online doing anything not nice, please, you know, tell them off, but politely. We need to stick together as a community and that includes self-policing. We need to stick together guys. Be polite please and respect Carrie's wishes and her free will as a person. Thanks. :)
I met you at stage door in February 2014 after a matinee performance of Les Mis. It was SUCH a treat to even be there - I had come on a trip with my boyfriend, we made time to see the show because it's my favourite one, I've seen it a few times in the West End and I want him to love it as much as I do (he now does!). When we came out after, I was already crying from the emotion of the show, and we rushed round to stage door half expecting not to even see you. But you were there, and it felt like such a privilege to meet you, and you were so gracious and kind and you spoke to us and hugged me for a photo. And you didn't have to do any of that. And that's something a lot of people need to understand before they go to a show of yours, even if it's just to see you and not particularly to go for love of the show itself. The treat is to see you doing what you do best. Thank you for being there when I was, but please know that we never felt like you had to be. All the love xxx
People expect too much these days. It's called being grateful for the experiences you do get and not assuming you automatically deserve to see someone. I can't imagine having anyone do any of those things.
Carrie I'm so glad that you've been able to make this video. I cannot believe that you've been treated that way in the past! If anything its the people looking through your things/pulling your hair that are being disrespectful not you at all! As a student nurse I've been bitten, scratched, kicked and taken abuse so I understand what its like to an extent trying to be kind to people who do not treat you as you'd like to be treated. it's especially difficult after a long day! I'm so sorry that some people think its okay to have done this to you, it's completely not. And you shouldn't feel bad for asking respect and a bit of normality! Sending love xxx
I promise not everyone in Plymouth will act like this and I hope it doesn't change your opinion on the beautiful city which I call home. I currently live opposite the theatre and every time I get the courage to walk over the road to meet you, I get a horrible anxiety attack. So in a way I guess it's a good thing because I don't want to add to your stress. I hope you're enjoying Plymouth and I hope you come back so I can stop being a bum and actually meet you! X
***** thank you so much! Mine has improved a great deal but things have been stressful lately which has made it worse I guess. I hope you continue fighting too! X
My best friend is going to the Plymouth show today, so I guess you're watching it right now I'm so jealous! I hope you get to meet Carrie x
+IdkJustHetty unfortunately I couldn't afford it, poor student over here aha! but I believe one day I'll get to meet her just gotta be patient x
Its not just Plymouth, I saw it happen in Nottingham, it wasn't nice to see people chasing Carrie down the street xx
Guys i just met her! I was walking past with my friend who pretty much forced me down the stairs as i was shaking. Carrie you're lovely and made me feel very calm! X
It breaks my heart that you feel like you should apologize. You're asking for common courtesy and basic respect. I'M sorry that people can be a-holes and not realize these things.
You're way too tolerant and kind. Seriously the behaviour you mentioned is not acceptable ever. You need to be more stern with people, make it clear that it is NOT ok for a stranger to touch you or take your belongings. And to anyone who's rude at stage door, take a moment to think about what you're doing/saying and use your brain to figure out whether or not it's appropriate. You may feel like you know Carrie because of her videos but she doesn't know you, you're literally a stranger. Think how you would feel if a stranger touched you without asking.
Thank you for being you. Thank you for giving us so many opportunities to meet you and thank you for being so kind and generous with your time and talents. You are INCREDIBLE and I wish you didn't have to give your audience these reminders but I'm grateful you are brave enough to do so.
You inspire. Thank you for having courage and being kind, Carrie ❤️
Don't feel bad about posting this. In general, the entitlement culture in our society has gotten out of hand. People feel entitled to all sorts of things from other people just because they are fans of them. Artists/performers etc do not owe anyone anything just because you watch someone's videos, or buy their cd, or go their live show. If someone thinks they're owed something by someone else(like their time or a photo or a chat or whatever it is they think they deserve from someone) they're the ones who are in the wrong. And it is terrible that the person on the other side has to be made to feel bad for someone else's entitled behavior. So never feel bad about missing stage door or not giving someone a photo or not talking to them (even if the reason you didn't is just because you didn't want to or didn't feel like it...you are allowed that). I don't know what we can do as a society to change the mindset that has made people think they deserve more from artists, but it needs to change. It is a very dangerous mindset that is damaging all around.
I remember 3 years ago going to London for the first time and seeing you in Les Mis and being more grateful than anything to watch you do the thing you love. I remember walking by stage door and considered waiting but by then the crowd was getting large and it was late so I decided to pass it up and get to the tube before it closed/so I could wander my way alone back to my hostel. I hope one day to meet you but not in a crazy or hectic or anxious way. Until then, thank you for everything you do. I really appreciate it.
No one has the right to touch you EVER. How selfish, rude and disrespectful of them to be so demanding. I am glad you made this video and disappointed that Hopefuls act this way. You should name and shame the tweets that say these things too.
I met you a few years back at Les Mis stage door. It was my first ever time at a stage door, I was in London on my own and I was so scared of someone thinking I was annoying and in the way but you were so nice and it calmed me right down. I'm very thankful and grateful for the time you shared with me. Anyone who oversteps boundaries and disrespects actors and performers should be ashamed of themselves because you owe them nothing.
In the description you say you felt bad for uploading this. Can I just ask why? All you have done is ask that people treat you with the respect that you and anyone else deserves. I see no wrong in that. Stay strong, we all love you Xxx
She probably feels mean that she meets some people and not others? I don't know, I think she has nothing to apologise for, and she deserves repsect as much as anybody else :) x
I was at stage door after one of your les mis shows; we watched you look out the dressing room window before leaving, and you never came out. And we totally understood. It was throwing it down with rain, and there were masses of people, and the ones who really care about you will be understanding and forgiving. Much love
I hate the fact that you feel like you have to apologize for wanting to be treated like a human being. You don't have to apologize at all, and you don't have to feel guilty about this. You haven't done anything wrong. I hope the people who do this see this video so that they can get their shit together and stop.
Don't let people get you down Carrie ,i would love to see people who believe that actors don't work hard to be in a show and see how difficult working in this industry is, weather it is getting bad reviews or comments on line or working unsociable hours. Doing crazy dance rehearsals or crazy vocal warm ups performing 8 sometimes more shows a week it is an incredibly difficult job. To the people who believe that acting and working in the film, television or theater industry is a joke or playing around I say lets see you do it. Thanks for making this video Carrie I love watching your videos they make me smile everyday. ✨
You can see her on the verge of tears! 😕
Honestly people should be grateful just to be able to see the show. There are many of us that can't even do that because we live in another country or can't afford it. Meeting you is an extra plus.