Tip #4. Make friends with the security officer in the store; then, they will have no idea that you are filming a UA-cam video to distract them while your accomplice shoplifts everything on the list.
And to think I was the only one who admired and whispered sweet nothings to the fresh meat display. 😂 On a side note - I wish Meijer would bring back the fresh lobster tanks they use to have. I would never miss a chance to go visit and chit-chat with them. Ah, the good ole days.
Other Pro-tip get the "wrong" brand sometimes. Although that is just an even larger gamble because you might not only have to go back to get the right one but you may have to return the first one.
A condition of getting my license as a teen was that I had to do the grocery store runs whenever asked. A couple years later, I met the guy who’d eventually become my husband. So being in that soppy phase, he offered to go along. He is very linear and has this whole point A to point B map he followed in stores. By contrast, my mother wrote things in no order apparent whatsoever. And she had very hard to decipher handwriting. Her other list quirk was abbreviating things. So even if you figured out what was written, knowing what it meant was another story. The poor man nearly had a meltdown trying to figure out whether “TP” meant toilet paper, toothpaste, or tomato paste.
Love the videos. Just bought a pull tab investor shirt for my sister as a Christmas gift. Goes witht lottery scratchers and white claws im giving her. That is Midwest as hell!
Forgetting something on the list is amazing. Either she sends you back and you get more beer or she doesn't trust you to get the groceries anymore and you get more beer otw home. It's flawless.
How to survive a grocery store during a snowstorm: Step 1- Go to the aisle that has the bread and milk Step 2- Panic because all the bread and milk is gone
2:27 to make this more confusing true yams are from a completely different family of plants than sweet potatoes. Yes, they're still plants where you eat the root/tuber but that's about it.
If you wanna know where the good food is follow the old people. They have all the secrets. But you gotta follow from a far, like stay 4-5 cart lengths back then offer to grab something off a shelf.
To help with #3, screw up #1 and #2, then "guess" and buy a bunch of those free items. (Bonus points if it's BOGO and you know what BOGO is). Do that a couple times and you'll be banished.
My dad calls my mom 3-5 times while at the store just to make sure he buys what she wants. It annoys my mom, but I just laugh because it wouldn’t be normal if my dad didn’t call her when at the store.
That is Hy-Vee. Has stores in 8 states throughout the Midwest. It has the highest standards and best service of any grocery store in the country. There are stores with a full bar and restaurants, along with giant buffets. Some stores have Whalburgers (Mark Whalburgers brother's restaurant), or a Hy-Vee brand restaurant. Although, all these amenities and high wages that the employees are paid comes at the cost of a price hike for the products they sell.
@@thepicgamer663 I used to work there we got a way with way too much shit when i worked on night stock when I went back to wine and spirits it was even more fun
@@alexthesniper1952 I worked at one of the test Dollar Fresh's for 2 years and helped that transform from a regular Hy-Vee. Then I interned under the corporate office for store operations and met a lot of the big dogs responsible for innovation. Met the official Hy-Vee cheese manager. You would be surprised how passionate these corporate managers were about their departments, especially those who work in the food service departments. Not so much anymore after the double lay-offs.
If Charlie's still single, tell him my grocery store is in da woods and what I don't get in da woods I get from da farm and discount store And I don't make lists.🙈🙉🙊😜
Tip 1: only shop at stores with an app showing the aisle locations of items. Like I have time to go on a treasure hunt looking for gluten free flour. Is it in the baking section or gluten free section? Maybe an end cap? Who knows? App knows.
1. Never go to grocery store on empty stomach 2. Make a list and organize by category, ie fruits, veg, meats, drinks, etc 3. Don’t go to grocery store at prime times, like a Saturday or Sunday 4. Don’t fall for the “it’s on sale” gimmick 5. Get Walmart plus and get groceries delivered free, you’ll save dozens of hours and there really are no fees, other than the membership
Tip #4 should be getting something that's not on the list but ya got it cause it was cheap or free, or very expensive but it's ur favorite so why not!!
The most important rule for me is do not indulge in the devils lettuce before hand, or you will leave with a giant jar of pickles, three different hot sauces and every flavor of hamburger helper because there was a sale and u wanted to try every kind
The meat and cheese platter is one of the WORST things to forget. It's got meat AND cheese. And like, GOOD cheese. If you're gonna forget a cheese, forget that cottage cheese.
100% agree why is it simply not called meat and cheese tray ?! dont need to make up words to a thing that is already defined with words its a bit redundant who is for really ? its not like everyone is french
The saying things the right way is too funny when years ago my sister was shopping for pollock fillets and said them like polak. After a minute or two of confusion the worker laughed and told her it was pronounced pol-lak. Never will not call them polak fillets whenever it doesn't matter though in honor of her and that story.
My #1 rule of the grocery store is: Never go hungry, otherwise you buy the whole store.
but I'm always hungry
I went grocery shopping once after eating at a buffet. Came home with cleaners and toiletries. No food 🤷🏼♀️😆
Dead on right. Nothing drains the grocery budget faster than shopping hungry.
Thats a good rule but when im full i dont feel like any food and Come home with half the list instead
SO TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Classic!
I particularly like the security guy in the background making sure you are not going to rob the store.
He's on Charcooperie watch duty
@@mravi8or HAHA , important task
Nah that's just Miles' hired muscle. Dude is rollin' now and can afford on-site security while he films his skits
On site security lmao. He doesn’t need security
"You wanna just shop for me? Or?" 😂 would've been gold if he would've said, OH YOU BETCHA, YEAH.
🤣 But one of my favorites, the late, great comedian Jeanne Robertson and her sketch: “Never Send a Man to the Grocery Store”.
5lbs of butter later. . . 🤣
You forgot, LEAVE YOUR PHONE AT HOME! This way she can't add to the list when you're halfway through checkout
Tip #4. Make friends with the security officer in the store; then, they will have no idea that you are filming a UA-cam video to distract them while your accomplice shoplifts everything on the list.
Shout out to the security officer who kept appearing in the background of the video.
My ex wife banged the security guard at marsh back in 2015-2016
Must be in a ghetto part of town
those dudes always take their jobs so seriously as if its Fort Knox lol wouldnt want a poor family to steal some food now would ya
it was weird seeing a security guard at a grocery store. never seen that before!
it's literally so true!! every moment of the video is perfect!!
My wife writes the list in order they are in the store. Especially when I go to Costco.
That's awesome!
I do that too. It's a must!!
That’s next level!
@@chrisgunsandguitars1403 I will admit, my wife definitely is
Until Costco reorganizes their store. 😅
You don't ACTUALLY forget something, you just leave it in the truck!!! Then when she sends you back, you go visit your local bar!!!
Looks like the old security guard came snooping finally to see what was going on ! 🤣🤣🤣
the security filming you 🤣
The cop looking at you going. What’s up with this loon! Noticed the YB hoodie and looks it up. Oh you betcha! 3:06
the charcuterie employee hopefully is not an aspiring actor, dude couldn't hold the laugh in before he was even addressed haha LOVE THESE SKITS
And to think I was the only one who admired and whispered sweet nothings to the fresh meat display. 😂
On a side note - I wish Meijer would bring back the fresh lobster tanks they use to have. I would never miss a chance to go visit and chit-chat with them. Ah, the good ole days.
Yessssssss! Loved those lobster tanks!! We used to tell our kids that if they behaved while shopping we’d go see the lobsters. Totally worked too.
my meijer still has lobsters
@@Griefer_Jesus I’m not sure what state you reside in, but where I live in Michigan there are no more lobsters.
You're great pal! I absolutely love it!
That cop really wanted to be in your video. Guessing Sweet Potato guy was afraid you'd kidnap him lol
Other Pro-tip get the "wrong" brand sometimes. Although that is just an even larger gamble because you might not only have to go back to get the right one but you may have to return the first one.
Unfortunately I would break down and send a photo to the wife. Off-brand or regular brand. Let her decide which one.
Charcooperie!! That's Norwegian for charcuterie. 🙂
Classic Midwest, spend half the day at the market and the other half at the hardware store. Weekend completed.
That’s a great picture for 1950! It’s so funny. My wife is tricky. He always makes me shop for stuff knowing how funny it will be.
A condition of getting my license as a teen was that I had to do the grocery store runs whenever asked.
A couple years later, I met the guy who’d eventually become my husband. So being in that soppy phase, he offered to go along.
He is very linear and has this whole point A to point B map he followed in stores.
By contrast, my mother wrote things in no order apparent whatsoever. And she had very hard to decipher handwriting.
Her other list quirk was abbreviating things. So even if you figured out what was written, knowing what it meant was another story.
The poor man nearly had a meltdown trying to figure out whether “TP” meant toilet paper, toothpaste, or tomato paste.
love the obvious cop just standing there the whole time
... lol
I do this all the time, no problem for I know the stores really well. ❤
Love the videos. Just bought a pull tab investor shirt for my sister as a Christmas gift. Goes witht lottery scratchers and white claws im giving her. That is Midwest as hell!
Forgetting something on the list is amazing. Either she sends you back and you get more beer or she doesn't trust you to get the groceries anymore and you get more beer otw home. It's flawless.
Hy-Vee. have not heard those words since the early 90s in IA. ha!
I freeze up when I get sent to the grocery store. I'm usually bugging the older ladies because I know they are moms and they know where everything is.
You know what'd be great to eat while watching the game? *A meat and cheese tray.*
+1, Wife.
Sent my husband to get quinoa once. He couldn’t pronounce quinoa. So he called me from the store and asked “where do I find kooinoha”. Lol 😂
Love your videos helps my PTSD
You remind me so much of PapaMeat it drives me crazy. Lol love your videos man
Tip 5. Grab a rack of Busch Lattes for the garage fridge! Wife grocery store run tax.
That last tip thou 😂
Learn to spell
Happy hour at a grocery store!? I need this!
I called "HyVee" within 5 seconds. Yes 🎉💪
lol your funny! I work at my grocery store's meat department as a stocker and wrapper, I wish you went shopping I'd love to help you out .
Love the videos keep it up 👍
Bro, that security guard at the end was on his ass trying to blend in
Your grocery store has a happy hour with appetizers and beer on top? Mind blown.
Fuck yeah I didn't listen to a word he said the first minute .
My hometown of New Orleans had a couple stores that had bars in them so Mom and the kids could shop and Dad could get a snootful.
thats a Hi-Ve, close enough, for ya, they have a cafiteria type deal as well as a gas station and a grocere store
Where's the sweet potato guy? 😆
I wonder what the cop at the end was waiting for 😂
I know people legitimately like this 🤣
It’s like I’m a crazy person because I’m a man who likes to grocery shop and cook dishes I enjoy eating
HyVee has kept the florescent trade in business.
If this is your spouse (which is totally my hubby) invest in online grocery pick-up 😂
How to survive a grocery store during a snowstorm:
Step 1- Go to the aisle that has the bread and milk
Step 2- Panic because all the bread and milk is gone
And that police officer is still standing there!!
So cool he is at HY VEE!!!!! our local store!!!
So true!👍🤣
2:27 to make this more confusing true yams are from a completely different family of plants than sweet potatoes. Yes, they're still plants where you eat the root/tuber but that's about it.
The diner at Hy-Vee is a pretty good rabbit hole
Life hack for this… deliver groceries. 😅
I prefer to do the shopping cause it means I can get more beer without having to convince them lol
This guy and I would be too good of friends.😂
My wife learned not to take/send me grocery shopping, because I go up and down EVERY aisle and throw stuff in like I'm 5.
If you wanna know where the good food is follow the old people. They have all the secrets. But you gotta follow from a far, like stay 4-5 cart lengths back then offer to grab something off a shelf.
Shout out to my brother Stacy. Hy-Vee Waverly Iowa.
Hilarious and so true!
To help with #3, screw up #1 and #2, then "guess" and buy a bunch of those free items. (Bonus points if it's BOGO and you know what BOGO is). Do that a couple times and you'll be banished.
My dad calls my mom 3-5 times while at the store just to make sure he buys what she wants. It annoys my mom, but I just laugh because it wouldn’t be normal if my dad didn’t call her when at the store.
miles you should send tackle box in for your groceries next time
Ask where the milk is, lol , the most bare necessity, that was good
Idk what grocery store has a bar and restaurant in it but i want to go there haha
Hy-Vee I never heard of them till I moved to KS but they are basically designed by god hahah
That is Hy-Vee. Has stores in 8 states throughout the Midwest. It has the highest standards and best service of any grocery store in the country. There are stores with a full bar and restaurants, along with giant buffets. Some stores have Whalburgers (Mark Whalburgers brother's restaurant), or a Hy-Vee brand restaurant. Although, all these amenities and high wages that the employees are paid comes at the cost of a price hike for the products they sell.
@@thepicgamer663 I used to work there we got a way with way too much shit when i worked on night stock when I went back to wine and spirits it was even more fun
@@alexthesniper1952 I worked at one of the test Dollar Fresh's for 2 years and helped that transform from a regular Hy-Vee. Then I interned under the corporate office for store operations and met a lot of the big dogs responsible for innovation. Met the official Hy-Vee cheese manager. You would be surprised how passionate these corporate managers were about their departments, especially those who work in the food service departments. Not so much anymore after the double lay-offs.
If Charlie's still single, tell him my grocery store is in da woods and what I don't get in da woods I get from da farm and discount store And I don't make lists.🙈🙉🙊😜
You forgot the beer section
Going to the grocery store when you're single and living on your own is easy.. fast forward to a wife and 3 kids and it's hell on earth
Aldi. 5 aisles. Minimal rabbit holes
And no distracting store music!
25cent cart...killer
@@tjellis1479 you get the quarter back when you’re done
whats up with the security cop? lol
I'm not even allowed to go to the grocery store. She goes when i'm at work.
why is the security guy following you? SHOP LIFTER!
I'm glad you finally let Ryan the t-shirt guy in one of your videos. The fake facial hair was a nice touch. Makes him look a little more mature.
Good stuff yayhh
Tip 1: only shop at stores with an app showing the aisle locations of items. Like I have time to go on a treasure hunt looking for gluten free flour. Is it in the baking section or gluten free section? Maybe an end cap? Who knows? App knows.
Never have called it a meat and cheese tray. It's always been a summer sausage and cheese tray.
Miles you need to renew the Busch light vs series there’s still so many you could do
1. Never go to grocery store on empty stomach
2. Make a list and organize by category, ie fruits, veg, meats, drinks, etc
3. Don’t go to grocery store at prime times, like a Saturday or Sunday
4. Don’t fall for the “it’s on sale” gimmick
5. Get Walmart plus and get groceries delivered free, you’ll save dozens of hours and there really are no fees, other than the membership
Boot Scootin'
Bro.....I've been married since 2015.......where TF was this video all these years????
Always add Busch lattes to the list.
1:58 the labels behind him look like my PH search history...
Asian
Asian
Asian
Hispanic
Hispanic
Tip #4 should be getting something that's not on the list but ya got it cause it was cheap or free, or very expensive but it's ur favorite so why not!!
How to write off your groceries 101
Buuuuuuuuuucccccccchhhhhhhhhh lite😆
The most important rule for me is do not indulge in the devils lettuce before hand, or you will leave with a giant jar of pickles, three different hot sauces and every flavor of hamburger helper because there was a sale and u wanted to try every kind
Security is waiting for you to finish making your video, he wants to talk to you
Is that "c" word supposed to be a well known word? 😂 so glad im single 💀
I work at a HyVee and this is hilarious
#2: It's pronounced "adult Lunchable".
My man. How do you go to Hy-Vee and not pick up a breakfast pizza?!
they are like 10 freakin dollars
Wife tip text the list with pictures of the products if you want a certain brand.
Game of Lawns season two coming 2023?
what state is this guy in??
I'm curious if Midwestern men are actually like this at the store, or is this all satire?
A little of both!
What’s the difference between a ram and a ford 😂😂
there is no survival
Let that guy know I’m single.
The meat and cheese platter is one of the WORST things to forget. It's got meat AND cheese. And like, GOOD cheese. If you're gonna forget a cheese, forget that cottage cheese.
100% agree why is it simply not called meat and cheese tray ?! dont need to make up words to a thing that is already defined with words its a bit redundant who is for really ? its not like everyone is french
The saying things the right way is too funny when years ago my sister was shopping for pollock fillets and said them like polak. After a minute or two of confusion the worker laughed and told her it was pronounced pol-lak. Never will not call them polak fillets whenever it doesn't matter though in honor of her and that story.
“Why can’t they just call it a meat and cheese tray?”Right?? Smh 🤦♀️
Wait, in the first frame.....what grocery store has a Happy Hour??? 😆 🤣
Here in Cleveland, some of our Giant Eagles have full bars with Happy Hour. Then on Friday nights, they have wine and food tastings. Food is free.
Only the BEST ones!!!