"Comb." Channel Four adverts, June 1994

Some adverts from almost exactly 30 years ago, although I'm too much of a shambles for that to be more than a coincidence. Encoded by myself long ago and then left fallow and forgotten for an age because they were so horribly out of sync. I've cleaned that up as best I can, but the video quality's still not great. From a showing (circa June 1994) of Michael Radford's definitive Nineteen Eighty-Four, filmed at the places and on the dates in the book, and filmed as close to black and white as the studio would let them, so it's appropriately grim, bleak and soul-destroying.
Here's a cheerful animated Cupid and the uplifting sound of Sam Cooke to break the spell in the name of commerce, and specifically a Citroen. This advert had already been running for a while; by now there's so much extra fine print it has to run in a little square surrounded by text. You get the point, though: car good. You want. Buy car now.
But! First be aware that cars are dangerous. Using the form of a contemporary generic PIF, Monroe Shock Absorbers demand your respect. And money. Fit them now or you will inevitably murder an entire row of small children on a zebra crossing by not being able to stop in time, you BASTARD. I am convinced they're a major contribution to road safety.
Next, Brian Conley titting about, at which to be fair he's very good. This is late in his spokesmanship for Radio Rentals, and as more and more people opt to just by a sodding television instead, the company is forced to diversify. Mobile phones are the new hotness, let's try renting those. And thus Conley ends up performing this wordless pantomime to very little effect, followed by a summation from an exaggerated cartoon caricature that I think is supposed to be of him - it's called Brian - but only resembles him generally and is voiced by Enn Reitel with no obvious attempt at an impression. That is Brian delivering the slogan, though.
Then, a route-one advert for Cesar, the no longer new name for Mr. Dog. Still using the same music, and obviously the same make of dog as well - a little white yappy mop-head thing. The usual thing all around, really: your doglet runs around with its women's magazine cover model owner, then has its dinner and gets a cuddle, intercut with packshots and closeups of dog food that we're assured are delicious-looking. There is a disturbing bit where the lady holds the meat up to her face for a loving sniff and for a second it looks like she's lost her mind and is about to tuck in herself, but she doesn't.
More beach scenes next, in a vaguely perfume-advert sort of setting. It's not that, though, as you may immediately realise from the music - the traditional backing to people wistfully explaining what, where or how they want to be. Whatever happened to Prudential, anyway? Well, nothing, they're still going strong today, still using the Wolff-Olins designed "face of Prudence" logo. They even recently re-adapted the font seen here. You don't see them advertise as much, is all. That face and "I want to be" was almost inescapable from the late 80s to the turn of the century, but now they've gone quiet. Not because the company went up the river, quite the opposite: they seem to be too big to need to advertise in this day and age. I'm just glad the corporate livery is still the same. There's not enough of that classically elegant mid-eighties graphic design around these days.
Next, a classic for Irn-Bru, which was finally expanding into Bastard England. Their adverts unsurprisingly took their cue from what HHCL were doing with Tango - alternative, ironic, absurdist, and generally having very little to do with the drink. This is the one where the Frog Prince turns out to be an annoying John Barrowman and is rejected out of hand. Personally I would have taken the castle, but I suppose as a princess she already has one. Slightly surprised that she doesn't turn out to have a Glaswegian accent, but they didn't want to underline the Scottishness of the product at that time.
Alternatively: lager. Australian lager, but the half-decent one (I'm told) that you can't get anymore except on import. Fair play to Castlemaine: their adverts were usually genuinely funny, in that particularly deadpan Australian way, even if they did tend to depict the entire country as consisting solely of parched desert and improvised corrugated iron structures. I mean, they do have a tree over there. I've seen it.
Then, a trailer for a film you almost certainly don't remember. The late Ray Liotta is dumped on a deserted island prison colony and macho hijinks ensue. The fact that they're selling it on Gale Ann Hurd suggests even they're not confident. Interesting facts: there are no women in it (ironically for this reason no-one would produce it until Hurd), but it does have Ian MacNeice, Jack Shepherd and Don Henderson, which is fun and results from the director being Martin Campbell.
Finally, that Citroen again. Cupid gives up and does a Flying Lady impression.

[@JontyMaster]

Some nice animation in the Citroen advert. It's indeed cheerful and overall cute.
Definitely gives me Roger Rabbit vibes.

[@eleanorhogan8643]

I was 3 years old then.

[@37Pete84]

I used to drive my mum mental whistling that Cesar tune.

[@whateversunpopular1338]

I loved No Escape even if no one else did

[@kaitlyn__L]

John Barrowman, obnoxious even then 😅

[@John-lp5xh]

Where are all the wonderful black people? 🤔

[@dilbertfish]

@John-lp5xh That would be the Lilt adverts.

[@whateversunpopular1338]

Always one ☝️

[@John-lp5xh]

@@whateversunpopular1338 always all of em now

[@whateversunpopular1338]

@@John-lp5xh getting bored on the Reform Party page?

[@John-lp5xh]

@@whateversunpopular1338 I'm getting bored on the street resembling Nairobi