29:11 Cave: "Okay, I think we shut down the impostor Caves calmly" Impostor Cave: "You'd like to think that, wouldn't you?" Cave: "Dammit! Stop imposting!" Impostor Cave: "Never!" Cave: "Oooh, you stubborn, handsome devil.."
I just realized, Cave Johnson might have been the only thing between Earth and the Resonance Cascade. Because everything seems to be going (relatively) fine in all the other universes where he's still alive.
Cave lines Timestamps: 0:00 Cave Prime #1 0:38 Cave Prime #2 1:10 Cave Prime #3 1:25 Sentient Cloud #1 1:53 Sentient Cloud #2 2:16 Sentient Cloud #3 2:25 Sentient Cloud #4 2:48 Cave Prime #4 3:22 Aperture Rituals 3:39 Soylent Green 3:59 Dancing Cave 4:18 RoboTACop #1 4:54 RoboTACop #2 5:18 Cave Prime #5 5:43 Apeture Space Prison #1 6:10 Apeture Space Prison #2 6:35 Apeture Space Prison #3 7:24 Mantis Cave 7:50 Aperture Testing in Space #1 8:21 Aperture Testing in Space #2 8:40 Aperture Testing in Space #3 9:07 Aperture Hobo jungle 9:38 Cave Prime #6 10:00 Shrieking Alien 10:22 Telekinesis incubation program 10:55 Maximun Age Birthday 11:27 RatCave johnson 11:51 Mantis-Man Invasion 12:07 Creepy Cave 12:32 Creepy Greg kid / Cave Prime #7 13:06 Fake Cave Prime #1 13:23 Fake Cave Prime #2 13:51 Cave Prime #8 14:17 AI Cave #1 14:56 AI Cave #2 15:24 AI Cave #3 15:47 AI Cave #4 16:10 AI Cave #5 16:26 AI Cave #6 16:59 AI Cave #7 17:39 AI Cave #8 17:57 Cave Prime #9 18:26 Aperture Paranormal 18:58 Tiny Chamber in Cave Blood 19:24 Ocean Prison SuperMaxLantis 19:53 Communist Replicas 20:21 Meow 20:35 Blackperture Mesa 21:04 Being of Light Cave 21:34 Cave Prime #10 21:53 Parallel Invasion Cave #1 22:26 Parallel Invasion Cave #2 22:51 Attack of the Killer Ants / Cave Prime #11 23:19 Sick Timmy #1 23:37 Calvina Johnson 24:12 Peanut Dust 24:25 Cave Prime #11 24:49 Cave Prime #12 25:06 Cave Prime #13 25:29 Sick Timmy #2 & Cave Prime #14 25:47 Cave Prime #15 26:07 Cave Prime #16 26:25 Cave Prime #17 26:47 Cave Prime #18 27:06 Godzilla Nest 27:35 Beatbox Johnson 28:02 Cave Prime #19 28:28 Cave Prime #20 28:52 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #1 29:12 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #2 29:24 Subliminal Propaganda 29:53 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #3 30:15 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #4 30:33 Aperture Gas Finding Science 30:57 Planet Cave Johnson 31:35 Cave Prime (Moneyverse)#21 32:04 Dark Cave Deal 32:25 Cave Prime #22 32:42 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #5 33:12 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #6 33:52 Cave Prime #23 (Final) And that's it
It is fascinating that no matter what timeline you're in, if someone gets made into GLaDOS, it will inevitably go awry. Also I love the idea of there being a timeline in which Cave Johnson acquired Black Mesa and stopped Half-Life from ever happening XD
"As you know, the sentient cloud banned all camera technology, hate getting its picture taken." "Ah! No! It's leeching all of my skin off!! That was an excerpt from one of our safety VIDEOS."
Welcome, citizens to the Ministry Of Science! Bureaucrats, Repairmen, Torture technicians, you're here because the state of Michigan is falling apart at the seams, and we need you more than ever. Now you've met one another on the limo ride over, so let me introduce myself: I'm Cave Johnson, I run this place. Before testing can begin, I''ll need you to fill out forms 865-C through E in triplicate and bring them to the associated office. Now get to it! (movie Brazil reference)
Mocking voice: I've just been informed by cjohnson that aperture has angered the cloud no no! It just came in from under the door its leeching of my skin!! AGGGGGHHHH!
Welcome,test subjects,to this dimensions 4th most popular website known as UA-cam. Gamers,web surfers,those who wish to download music without buying it...your here to watch,and comment on,the things of your interests.Now you all have made and read comments,so let me introduce myself.Im Cave Johnson...PRIME. These alternate Caves are just pulling your leg.If you are in another dimension and stumble upon this comment, proceed to send your resume to the Universe Address "Prime". Chariots Chariots
"cave johnson here, due to a new fangled theory these egg heads have come up with simply called "image compression" and after wards causing what could be roughly called "universal quality down-sising" I now look like a really shitty self potrait , and so does everyone else, but this shouldn't effect testing entirely so just keep testing and you should be fine, chariot.
I'm sure you figured this out. It's a Cave from an alternative universe who just so happens to say "Chariots" as well. So our Cave prime starts saying "Chariot Chariot"
Unsure if you found out yourself in the past two months, but these are from the Infinite Testing Initiative. That is, the map creator. The in-story reason for all the user-made maps being possible being that Aperture Science just got other universes to build them. So if custom map making isn't on the PS3 version, that'd be why you haven't heard them. They play when you enter a custom map.
This is from the game Portal, a game made out of love, brilliance and brainjuice. It's a puzzle game, and this is Cave Johnson, speaking for the DLC testing which takes place in space. Lots of weird shit going on. Check out other lines from this game
If you think you're having flashbacks of your former life, don't worry. Those aren't yours. Those are actually a real-time feed of Greg's current life. He is a sad little man.
12:07 is what they're talking about. I can't believe they omitted Mantis Cave from that list in the first place though, so i can understand your confusion.
2:22...I just looked over at the door to my room and saw my cat, who looked at me, then suddenly I hear: Meow. meow meow. meow meow meow, meow meow. meow.
That's because this was only for the Steam version. They used these lines in the add on content where players could create there own test chambers and let other people test them. Search for "Portal 2 Perpetual Testing Initiative" to learn more.
i have anserwes for 2 and 3 for 2 earths test chambers wouldnt be depleted because the tesing in a multivers making there be infinte test chamber.for 3 preety much the same as 2.
29:11
Cave: "Okay, I think we shut down the impostor Caves calmly"
Impostor Cave: "You'd like to think that, wouldn't you?"
Cave: "Dammit! Stop imposting!"
Impostor Cave: "Never!"
Cave: "Oooh, you stubborn, handsome devil.."
You are a DVD copy of shrek 1
its comlink, as in his radio, not calmy
When the imposter is sus 😳
mogus
this is a suspicious comment..
6:15 Half Life proven less possible.
I just realized, Cave Johnson might have been the only thing between Earth and the Resonance Cascade. Because everything seems to be going (relatively) fine in all the other universes where he's still alive.
Actually yes, because he canonically shut down Black Mesa after buying it and rebranding it.
I love how the ‘throw science at the wall’ company is OBJECTIVELY BETTER IN EVERY WAY than the government funded research facility
Cave lines Timestamps:
0:00 Cave Prime #1
0:38 Cave Prime #2
1:10 Cave Prime #3
1:25 Sentient Cloud #1
1:53 Sentient Cloud #2
2:16 Sentient Cloud #3
2:25 Sentient Cloud #4
2:48 Cave Prime #4
3:22 Aperture Rituals
3:39 Soylent Green
3:59 Dancing Cave
4:18 RoboTACop #1
4:54 RoboTACop #2
5:18 Cave Prime #5
5:43 Apeture Space Prison #1
6:10 Apeture Space Prison #2
6:35 Apeture Space Prison #3
7:24 Mantis Cave
7:50 Aperture Testing in Space #1
8:21 Aperture Testing in Space #2
8:40 Aperture Testing in Space #3
9:07 Aperture Hobo jungle
9:38 Cave Prime #6
10:00 Shrieking Alien
10:22 Telekinesis incubation program
10:55 Maximun Age Birthday
11:27 RatCave johnson
11:51 Mantis-Man Invasion
12:07 Creepy Cave
12:32 Creepy Greg kid / Cave Prime #7
13:06 Fake Cave Prime #1
13:23 Fake Cave Prime #2
13:51 Cave Prime #8
14:17 AI Cave #1
14:56 AI Cave #2
15:24 AI Cave #3
15:47 AI Cave #4
16:10 AI Cave #5
16:26 AI Cave #6
16:59 AI Cave #7
17:39 AI Cave #8
17:57 Cave Prime #9
18:26 Aperture Paranormal
18:58 Tiny Chamber in Cave Blood
19:24 Ocean Prison SuperMaxLantis
19:53 Communist Replicas
20:21 Meow
20:35 Blackperture Mesa
21:04 Being of Light Cave
21:34 Cave Prime #10
21:53 Parallel Invasion Cave #1
22:26 Parallel Invasion Cave #2
22:51 Attack of the Killer Ants / Cave Prime #11
23:19 Sick Timmy #1
23:37 Calvina Johnson
24:12 Peanut Dust
24:25 Cave Prime #11
24:49 Cave Prime #12
25:06 Cave Prime #13
25:29 Sick Timmy #2 & Cave Prime #14
25:47 Cave Prime #15
26:07 Cave Prime #16
26:25 Cave Prime #17
26:47 Cave Prime #18
27:06 Godzilla Nest
27:35 Beatbox Johnson
28:02 Cave Prime #19
28:28 Cave Prime #20
28:52 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #1
29:12 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #2
29:24 Subliminal Propaganda
29:53 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #3
30:15 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #4
30:33 Aperture Gas Finding Science
30:57 Planet Cave Johnson
31:35 Cave Prime (Moneyverse)#21
32:04 Dark Cave Deal
32:25 Cave Prime #22
32:42 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #5
33:12 Dark Cave & Cave Prime #6
33:52 Cave Prime #23 (Final)
And that's it
It is fascinating that no matter what timeline you're in, if someone gets made into GLaDOS, it will inevitably go awry.
Also I love the idea of there being a timeline in which Cave Johnson acquired Black Mesa and stopped Half-Life from ever happening XD
"As you know, the sentient cloud banned all camera technology, hate getting its picture taken."
"Ah! No! It's leeching all of my skin off!! That was an excerpt from one of our safety VIDEOS."
that's why it started leeching
"All hail the sentient cloud" Cave Johnson predicts the XboxOne
Are you still here ?
@@masterguy6534the cloud got him
I rather have him as a boss then... Well what ever is your boss
one of my previous bosses wished he was CJ
The president is a prisoner in Super-Maxlantis! Are you bad enough a dude to save him?
14:16 - Wow so there was a Cave that actually got ported in time.
Nah he just died faster because he ate moonrock cereal
@@wessltov If he died even faster, then how was the GLaDOS team supposed to get the system up and running with less time to do it?
@@KentoCommenT That is a good question! I guess they started working on it 30 years ago, like Cave suggested in his dialogue
@@wessltov Yeah that's possible
Love the references to Soylant green, Scanners, The Shining and Robocop.
And most importantly, Ghostbusters!
Time stamps please
Body snatchers as well.
18:50 *cough cough* Bill *cough cough*
Fun fact: Cave Johnson has the same VA as Tenzin from The Legend of Korra.
I can't not see his sharp-ass beard.
+MichaelLeonhardt And Ford from Gravity Falls
And Most Importantly J Jonah Jameson
And the mayor from zootopia
And he's Emil Skoda from Law & Order SVU. And he's Omni-Man.
Does the Sentient Cloud happen to glow, by chance?
+ebiljebus ALL HAIL THE GLOW CLOUD
Some kinda storm but if you ask me? There's an intelligence in their somewhere
A L L H A I L T H E G L O W C L O U D
Mantis Johnson is my favorite!
I really wish they would make little live action videos depicting J.K. Simmons as Cave Johnson recording these clips :D
It's so weird to hear his voice without an echo
Welcome, citizens to the Ministry Of Science! Bureaucrats, Repairmen, Torture technicians, you're here because the state of Michigan is falling apart at the seams, and we need you more than ever.
Now you've met one another on the limo ride over, so let me introduce myself: I'm Cave Johnson, I run this place.
Before testing can begin, I''ll need you to fill out forms 865-C through E in triplicate and bring them to the associated office. Now get to it!
(movie Brazil reference)
Mocking voice: I've just been informed by cjohnson that aperture has angered the cloud no no! It just came in from under the door its leeching of my skin!! AGGGGGHHHH!
Welcome,test subjects,to this dimensions 4th most popular website known as UA-cam. Gamers,web surfers,those who wish to download music without buying it...your here to watch,and comment on,the things of your interests.Now you all have made and read comments,so let me introduce myself.Im Cave Johnson...PRIME. These alternate Caves are just pulling your leg.If you are in another dimension and stumble upon this comment, proceed to send your resume to the Universe Address "Prime". Chariots Chariots
Greg is Pyro!
6:10 I'm pretty sure thats a reference to all the vent-crawling in half-life haha
3:22 he didnt say chariots, ITS AN IMPOSTER!!
All hail the hobo king !!!
"I NEED PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN, GREG. BLACK MESA HAS PICTURES OF SPIDER-MAN."
"cave johnson here, due to a new fangled theory these egg heads have come up with simply called "image compression" and after wards causing what could be roughly called "universal quality down-sising" I now look like a really shitty self potrait , and so does everyone else, but this shouldn't effect testing entirely so just keep testing and you should be fine, chariot.
ima start introducing myself with the suffix: prime, earth one
It's like Rick and Morty but just Cave Johnson.
Use harmonica
Cave jonsen:I am the hobo KING
30:33 That alternate earth sounds frigging awesome!
Wait, so the chariots cave Johnson is from our universe, and the rest are all from alternate universes?
AAAHHHHH NOW THERES ONE THAT SAYS CHARIOT CHARIOT THAT CLAIMS HES FROM OUR UNIVERSE
I'm sure you figured this out. It's a Cave from an alternative universe who just so happens to say "Chariots" as well. So our Cave prime starts saying "Chariot Chariot"
Every moment was pure comedy gold
meow, meow, meow meow meow meow meow, meow
The sentient cloud was mentioned by Dr. Bree: "Gas giants, inhabited by vast meteorological intelligences."
12:07 Worst ASMR ever.
20:35 -- and the whole Half-Life series was averted xD
20:35
Unsure if you found out yourself in the past two months, but these are from the Infinite Testing Initiative. That is, the map creator. The in-story reason for all the user-made maps being possible being that Aperture Science just got other universes to build them. So if custom map making isn't on the PS3 version, that'd be why you haven't heard them. They play when you enter a custom map.
Creepy Cave is the one that goes on about hair and feet.
ALL HAIL THE GLOW CLOUD
+AbbiXIII
PRAISE THE LORD!
This is from the game Portal, a game made out of love, brilliance and brainjuice. It's a puzzle game, and this is Cave Johnson, speaking for the DLC testing which takes place in space. Lots of weird shit going on. Check out other lines from this game
"....... So salty"
Also
"Stop imposting!!!"
4:54 Heavy quote: You are loose cannon sandvich! And a damn good cop!
If you think you're having flashbacks of your former life, don't worry. Those aren't yours. Those are actually a real-time feed of Greg's current life. He is a sad little man.
12:07 is what they're talking about. I can't believe they omitted Mantis Cave from that list in the first place though, so i can understand your confusion.
20:47 I think this is Gabe Newells way of saying Half Life 3 is never coming.
we're gonna test forever and ever and ever!
Poor Greg, he's getting traded to other Cave's.
I said I'd give you an exception to bowing! Please don't burn down my cloud house with lemons or kick me in my cloud-balls!
is it bad that I don't hear cave Johnson, I hear ford
Cave came first
... but I hear J Jonah Jameson
i know but still Ford is the role i heard im in first
Jk simmons
robo-no... ROBOTA COP
Oh that's much better.
that one dislike was black mesa
Cave Johnson sounds like someone who should have a mustache.
No not really.
Dwight Schrute
He sounds like the editor-in-chief from Spider Man. Who else is more worthy of a mustache?
N3bu14Gr4y Not Cave Johnson. That's for sure.
Dwight Schrute NO! NO, GOD, NO! NO! NOOOOOOO!!!!!
N3bu14Gr4y That was Michael. "I am fast. To give you a reference point I am somewhere between a snake and a mongoose… And a panther." -Me.
cave johnson jr best character true hero of portal 2
29:24
A reference to the 1988 movie, They Live.
OBEY
Money wouldn't be worthless, money wouldn't be money.
Imagine what the game would be like if Cave was put in charge instead if Caroline.
The perfect quality of the audio and the horrible quality of the image is weird.
The pyro's name is Greg?
Hahah XDD
Death was my monster! And I killed it.....where's my Olympus?...
OH MY GOD. Valve, the only developer in the entire universe could make a Blacula reference in their game.
Bums me out we didn’t get some of these voicelines in game
I fucking love this guy
this. is. BRILLIANT!
It's 30 minutes long, yes, but it demands to be swallowed whole.
I am the Sentient Cloud. Bow to me!
lol " How good is the science here? well, getta loada this im DEAD!"
I listened to the entire thing @.@
2:22...I just looked over at the door to my room and saw my cat, who looked at me, then suddenly I hear: Meow. meow meow. meow meow meow, meow meow. meow.
I guess he went to the TF2 universe.
if I had a dollar for every pixel on screen I'd owe someone money
Also JK Simmons is a national treasure
Someone has to rewrite all of Earth's Literature to include ghost busting, that would be cool.
All hail the glow cloud
This is legit comedy fucking gold
I listened to all of it... No regrets.
Cave must be a GhostBusters fan XD
16:28 cave johnson lines
That's because this was only for the Steam version. They used these lines in the add on content where players could create there own test chambers and let other people test them.
Search for "Portal 2 Perpetual Testing Initiative" to learn more.
The computer cave is so sad...
that, has been an adventure...
Joke's on you Dark Cave. I hate asparagus!
So... Greg is the Pyro?
Wait didin't Cave say the cloud is outside?
And at the end of Portal 2 Chell went outside?
"Roboco- Robotocop" Lol!
Cave Johnson
Cave Prime
Creepy Cave
CAVeOS
Dark Cave
Greg's Daughter
Timmy
Also imposter Cave
And cat cave, Half Life Cave,
Pure light cave,
6:43 air vent quotes 8:30
12:32 IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THIS?! DOES NO ONE REALIZE WHO THAT IS?!
that's greg's kid. if you're implying that it's chell, that's a possibility but it isn't confirmed
i have anserwes for 2 and 3 for 2 earths test chambers wouldnt be depleted because the tesing in a multivers making there be infinte test chamber.for 3 preety much the same as 2.
True...
And yet another was a planet.
I love cave, DONT TAKE THE LEMONS!!!!!
there from perpetual testing initiative
Lol a guy named Greg messaged me on Facebook the second 31:48 hit and it blew my friggin mind.
🤣🤣🤣
hey! in one of them rat man is the president! Also, isnt earth one also parallel. because on ours cave is dead?
Hello Cave Johnson. tell me do you have a Greg over there?
"lay off the solent green"
Cat-Cave
Mantis-Cave
Space Cave
So do these play whenever you play a community test from workshop?
22:36
cave on the topic of the combine?
I've been replaced by an alien that produces seeds that germinate from its exoskeleton? -_-
Portaled in and portal out. Now Aperture Science Approved Regulated Terminology.
5:19 I’ll thank myself later