Should I Reach Out To My Ex After No Contact

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  • Опубліковано 28 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 808

  • @Brian_mcnugget77
    @Brian_mcnugget77 Рік тому +25

    Coachlee much respect buddie same shit i experienced 🙌🏿

  • @-KorruptionOfLight-
    @-KorruptionOfLight- Рік тому +565

    Confidence is attractive. Staying away is showing confidence in yourself. They may come back. They may never speak to you again. It doesn't matter. You are still you. The sun will still shine. You will learn.

    • @plusone8015
      @plusone8015 Рік тому +18

      I learned 🙏
      The whole time it was my ego that was my enemy. ☯️

    • @-KorruptionOfLight-
      @-KorruptionOfLight- Рік тому +3

      @@k-mart7475 yes. If you want to

    • @leemurray3414
      @leemurray3414 Рік тому +4

      My ex has asked for space and has set a date to re connect. Is this a good sign?

    • @-KorruptionOfLight-
      @-KorruptionOfLight- Рік тому +2

      @@leemurray3414 probably

    • @futthet6743
      @futthet6743 Рік тому +2

      @@k-mart7475haha no. You’re the one who ended it, you have to be the one to start trying to fix it.

  • @dreypipes
    @dreypipes Рік тому +331

    Listen to Coach Lee. No matter your justification for reaching out, most times it doesn’t impact your ex. It’s all in your mind. Remain in no contact & slowly but surely the universe will do its thing💪🏼

    • @SUBSCRlB3D
      @SUBSCRlB3D Рік тому +2

      Never reach out. Be strong and let your ex decide for themselve.

    • @retard_activated
      @retard_activated Рік тому +1

      Facts!

    • @plusone8015
      @plusone8015 Рік тому +15

      Lee is like the emergency room Doctor for the broken hearted 💔
      As far as breaking no contact I always hear Curtis Blow’s voice from the 80s song, “White Lines”… “Don’t!! Don’t do it, baby!!”

    • @retard_activated
      @retard_activated Рік тому

      @@plusone8015 Great song! 😆😁💖

    • @plusone8015
      @plusone8015 Рік тому +10

      You are so right. Flowing with the universe is so much wiser than fighting it.
      I have been wrestling with stress and suddenly realize I need to TRULY flow by accepting the challenges before me.
      Thank you for your comment.

  • @COVENANT_ENFORCER
    @COVENANT_ENFORCER Рік тому +217

    Self respect is the best part of No Contact. Let them learn and experience the pain that you went through.

    • @kuduyudu
      @kuduyudu Рік тому +1

      Let them learn- I relate

    • @lilliankillian7366
      @lilliankillian7366 Рік тому

      Yes but they have to care .we wete togeather for 3 and half years andnow apart for 4 months and nothing from him should I reach out to see how he's doing?? Ty for any advice

    • @pranithanukala4408
      @pranithanukala4408 Рік тому

      @@lilliankillian7366I feel you. I’m in the same boat.

    • @duckymomo1687
      @duckymomo1687 7 місяців тому

      @@lilliankillian7366anything new?

    • @duckymomo1687
      @duckymomo1687 7 місяців тому

      @@pranithanukala4408anything new?

  • @os3688
    @os3688 Рік тому +151

    Been 2 years. No contact. I’m cool with never hearing from her again. I still watch coach lee and other coaches for my anxiety and to learn for future relationships. It really helps. Thanks

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +5

      os3688, watching Coach Lee's videos helps EVERYONE, including me, years ago when I went thru a horrible Breakup! Many people binge watch him and they always feel better.
      I know it's very tough and I've certainly been there. I want to suggest that you consider Coach Lee's "Emergency Breakup Kit." It's such a good guide to help you so that you aren't just wondering on your own. It covers a lot of situations and has strategies that you probably haven't thought of. The link for it is myexbackcoach.com/ebk. I wholeheartedly recommend it and wish you the very best of luck.

    • @os3688
      @os3688 Рік тому +12

      @@GeiraLindqvist nah sadly… i reached out after 2 weeks no contact.. didnt go well. Then reached out after 4 months… didnt go well. I said too much in my messages. (Nothing about feelings) just meeting up for coffee but i rushed it. Have not heard from her since and last time sometime around last year I checked her insta and she was with another guy. (Downgrade if id ever seen lmao). I think about her often and wish it went differently. Moving on gets easier and easier though.

    • @os3688
      @os3688 Рік тому +8

      @@GeiraLindqvist Don’t wait on her. I wasted a lot of time. Peace and love ✌🏻

    • @xcoachkim
      @xcoachkim Рік тому

      I love this idea about learning for future relationships and I think it is so important to carry ourselves forward positively so that we can show up in future relationships with the right mindset and be able to make it. I wanted to let you know about Coach Lee's live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's legit amazing and I can't emphasise enough how valuable it is. The focus is on saving a relationship from a breakup or separation and then keeping it strong afterwards. The workshop includes a coaching call every month for 6 months. You can reach out to Coach Lee's team, specifically Johnny, to set up an appointment and discuss it further at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I believe it's an eye-opening and incredibly helpful experience that you won't want to miss out on.

    • @ohmandy6008
      @ohmandy6008 Рік тому

      Same here. It’s been 2 years….

  • @YHWHonmymind
    @YHWHonmymind 9 місяців тому +31

    If you were broken up with never ever reach out. Give them their space and live your life with grace. That’s attractive!

  • @jiu-jitsu8234
    @jiu-jitsu8234 Рік тому +118

    Reaching out to them only gives them satisfaction that they made the right choice for leaving and that you’re struggling without them don’t give them that

  • @trizahnjuguna1471
    @trizahnjuguna1471 Рік тому +87

    Do Not reach out to anyone who doesn’t want you . Stop being insecure, I never reached out to my ex then now my husband for four months . I was silent until he came back begging

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +1

      trizahnj, is it possible that you may get back together?
      I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

    • @skincarerainbow4950
      @skincarerainbow4950 8 місяців тому +1

      Wow

  • @dfsw
    @dfsw Рік тому +102

    These videos help people who are going through a breakup but people in a relationship should be listening too because it is a lot easier to work on a relationship before it's too late rather than trying to get back together.

    • @rajdeepkundu4552
      @rajdeepkundu4552 Рік тому +2

      Very good and imp points 🥺

    • @reinalooper3314
      @reinalooper3314 Рік тому

      This

    • @SirValeous
      @SirValeous Рік тому

      That's a great point. I want you to spell it out though. How does advice in this particular video help those in a relationship to 'save it'?

    • @sheliasmith2884
      @sheliasmith2884 Рік тому +1

      So true 👍

    • @xcoachkim
      @xcoachkim Рік тому

      I know it's really difficult and I completely empathise with where you're coming from! I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

  • @sakai703
    @sakai703 6 місяців тому +7

    'Believe in yourself enough to know that if you take yourself out of the situation you WILL BE MISSED. That you are ATTRACTIVE, you are VALUABLE enough for that to happen'
    Thankyou. Really needed that today.

  • @RaquelRavage
    @RaquelRavage Рік тому +40

    theres no point in breaking no contact....you have to respect yourself and if you loved them respect them, regardless of their crappy reasoning on why they broke up. work on yourself, and allow the stages of grief to come upon you. you will feel sad as far as it will go...the world will appear grey...but trust that going through the hell will get you back to the light. no contact and working on yourself is the best option because if they come back youll be a better version than prior, if they don't you can find someone else in your better shape, and if they do come back you may have to turn them away if they havent grown and that will require your better state. im truly sorry so many of us go through this tragedy and trauma.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      RaquelRavage I understand no contact very well however,
      I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

    • @Alchemist_171
      @Alchemist_171 Рік тому

      Thank you so much, felt better reading this. God bless.

  • @sharonpowell6109
    @sharonpowell6109 Рік тому +31

    I’ve Got My Ex Back! Thank U Coach Lee❤❤❤

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      sharonpowell6, I am so happy for you. Just in case you need us again, you never know, I know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for the both if you.

  • @DerickDerick-o5d
    @DerickDerick-o5d Рік тому +21

    Guys please listen to coach Lee. I broke no contact after 30 days. Even though she sounded glad to hear from me after they get the attention they do not care. They'll go back treating you the same like after the break up.

  • @pepperjack6421
    @pepperjack6421 Рік тому +51

    It’s been a year Lee, and she just reached out. She’s being reserved but much more open than in the past, she’s young so I don’t read much into that shyness. I’m channeling you and keeping it cool and polite and the reactions are very interesting. She mentioned our past but said she thinks a lot about what we had. I said there were no hard feelings and I was open to talk. She seemed very taken aback like I couldn’t possibly let it go or not hurt over her and not pursue her. I’m not sure if that’s just ego or what, but I’m staying strong and trying to be smart about this. Thanks for everything you do brother, you’re a life saver even if she never comes back.

    • @sloanmagnum5009
      @sloanmagnum5009 Рік тому +9

      It sounds like she just wants to see if she has power over you. Someone with that kind of ego or attitude is someone you want to avoid.

    • @RickySpanish12344
      @RickySpanish12344 Рік тому

      How long were you two together for?

    • @pepperjack6421
      @pepperjack6421 Рік тому +2

      @@RickySpanish12344 a bit over a year

    • @RickySpanish12344
      @RickySpanish12344 Рік тому

      @@pepperjack6421 oh alright. Good luck man

    • @xcoachkim
      @xcoachkim Рік тому

      Hey @pepperjack6421 it sounds like you're in a tough spot. I know it can be difficult navigating the reconciliation process with your ex and getting back together, it might be one of the toughest things to do right after no contact! It may be beneficial to seek a more professional approach. I highly recommend booking a coaching session with Coach Lee or one of his staff coaches. They will be able to provide the necessary expertise and devote time to address your unique situation. You can schedule a session by visiting this link: myexbackcoach.com/book-with-coach-lee/. This way, you'll receive personalized guidance.

  • @PimpinWitch
    @PimpinWitch Рік тому +32

    Coach Lee is spot on! I made every mistake possible with my ex, I messaged him nicely and politely but every time he just left me on read. It’s been two years and I still love him and hope he will come back, I think I’ve blown it because he knows I’ll always be here no matter what. I made the mistakes and now I’m paying the price for them. Listen to Coach Lee, he is 100% right and is an absolute God send. I wish I’d listened earlier, I just hope and pray in time my love will come back. Our relationship was lovely and nothing horrible happened (except for the breakup), I will always have faith in how much we once loved each other and I will hope that one day our love will be reunited. God willing 🙏

    • @RickySpanish12344
      @RickySpanish12344 Рік тому +6

      Here is my advice to you. find someone else. Here is why. You will either find someone else to love, OR he comes back eventually. It's weird but sometimes when the connection is cut (your love), that's when they return. It's like a woman I know. A guy ended with her, and a couple years later he calls up begging for her to take him back (he'd paid an agency to find her new number)..... She was with someone else though, and told him she had waited but it was too late. Funny isn't it? She waited like over a year for him and nothing.... then she gets someone else and he's begging for her back.

    • @PimpinWitch
      @PimpinWitch Рік тому +1

      @@RickySpanish12344 Thank you for taking time to write your reply, that was truly excellent advice. Thank you, I can definitely see what you’re saying is correct. Thanks for being supportive and hopeful, you have a lovely soul. Wishing you all the kindness in the world 🙏

    • @RickySpanish12344
      @RickySpanish12344 Рік тому

      @@PimpinWitch thank you for such a kind reply! Wish you the best :)

    • @xcoachkim
      @xcoachkim Рік тому

      Your message is beautiful and I totally understand how tough it is. Trust me, I've been there myself. I wanted to let you know about Coach Lee's live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's seriously amazing and I can't stress enough how valuable it is. The focus is on saving a relationship from a breakup or separation and then keeping it strong afterwards. The workshop includes a coaching call every month for 6 months. You can reach out to Coach Lee's team, specifically Johnny, to set up an appointment and discuss it further at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I believe it's an eye-opening and incredibly helpful experience that you won't want to miss out on.

    • @mardrettekemp7182
      @mardrettekemp7182 Рік тому

      Mine reached out after 2 and a half years.

  • @AI-zp6wx
    @AI-zp6wx Рік тому +34

    It's been 3 months since the breakup and 2,5 months of no contact. I'm still going strong.
    I really hope my silence will wake up something inside of him, because I always were the one to reach out first, even during out first breakup last summer -- I was always reachable, nearby, was trying to make conversations, we even met up as friends a couple of times, etc.
    Not gonna do it anymore.
    He's probably not expecting silence from someone like me, and this is exactly what I'm giving him now.
    He's very slow, selfish and stubborn, so even if he realises comething about our relationship, it's going to take a while. But I'm determined to stay away. It's the only right thing to do. At this point, it's not even about him, it's about my self-respect.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +2

      Al-zp6wx, I am very proud of you you for holding your ground. GOOD FOR YOU. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK. ❤❤

    • @AI-zp6wx
      @AI-zp6wx Рік тому +2

      @@jannlewandowski5540 thank you so so much for your kind words!! ❤❤

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +2

      @@AI-zp6wx You are very welcome!''😉

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +1

      ​@@AI-zp6wx Just in case, you will find this interesting know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

    • @plug322
      @plug322 Рік тому +1

      Has he reached out?

  • @ahmayya24
    @ahmayya24 Рік тому +36

    Anytime I wanted to reach out to him. I came back here to watch this again. I do this multiple times anytime I feel weak and wanted to reach out to him. This video helps me a lot from reaching out. Coach Lee is absolutely right. He has your best interest ❤🎉😢😅😊 Mach appreciated Coach

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      ahmay,
      I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

  • @MrC5vette
    @MrC5vette 3 місяці тому +1

    Thanks!

  • @jessicadavis4163
    @jessicadavis4163 Рік тому +19

    Coach Lee is always on point. ALWAYS! At least when it’s come to my relationship. Mine has an avoidant attachment style and when I reached out when we broke up, it wasn’t a good situation, and I was back at square one. Best chances are to go in no contact. Keep yourself busy so you’re not stewing in your thoughts and want to reach out. DO NOT beg for someone’s love and don’t show them that either.

    • @FM-zg5hz
      @FM-zg5hz Рік тому +2

      Hi did he reach out? My ex is also textbook avoidant.

    • @jessicadavis4163
      @jessicadavis4163 Рік тому +1

      We had a crazy dynamic at the time. This was almost 4 yrs ago now. It’d take me forever to explain it all. To try and make a long story short, he cheated and threw me to the wolves. We still slept together while he was dating her 🤮 I reached out constantly like a moronic lost puppy. It did me no good. He treated me like crap. I was begging for love that he 💯 didn’t wanna give. He was giving it to the other woman. Once I finally started dating someone else is when he reached out. When we were still sleeping together, he knew he still had me in his pocket. Once I started dating, that’s when he was like oh no I’m gonna lose her. He realized the grass wasn’t actually greener on the other side and that myself and our children were most important. It was a mess of a situation on both ends. I didn’t do right by him either and have also cheated in our relationship before. It’s been yrs since all of that happened. I’m still bitter and resentful but, I’m in therapy, I’m trying very hard to forgive. I get triggered by so many things. Sometimes very minor that sends me over the edge. It’s a work in progress. We’re trying to make positive and healthy changes in our relationship and dynamic. I recently moved back in w/ him and we’re doing better than ever. I hate what happened, but I’m also grateful at the same time. That experience completely changed me as a woman and I’m not the same person I was back then. I wish you the best of luck on your journey! 🍀

  • @detectivejimmymcnulty1676
    @detectivejimmymcnulty1676 Рік тому +10

    I spent the first week begging and pleading in a rather pathetic manor. I wish so desperately I’d come across your channel a day or two after she left me. I did two “grand romantic gestures” countless apologies, and it only pushed her farther away. I’m in day 3 of no contact now, and we’ll see how it goes. I’m focused currently on dealing with the pain and evolving and growing into my best self. DO NOT REACH OUT. You will regret it when rejection comes again and again

    • @mohittanvar5117
      @mohittanvar5117 11 місяців тому +1

      Any updates?? Did u get ur ex back after no contact

  • @rickpittenger121
    @rickpittenger121 Рік тому +12

    Coach Lee is amazing! I broke up with my ex last May 2022 after an argument, she quickly got into a rebound and I had dumpers remorse, and I reacted poorly to the situation and did everything wrong. However, thanks to Lee and Ken I went into no contact and got her back a few months later. But, I got her back by responding to breadcrumbs and being too eager and showing her my feelings, and she quickly lost attraction and broke up with me 37 days ago. Now I’m strong after absorbing everything in these videos and she has reached out for my birthday, made some other excuses to reach out; but this time I’m casual and reserved. I will keep letting her come to me, and now I have faith that it’s working, and I can’t force it. Thanks Coach for helping me trust this process and keeping faith and staying patient. You have helped me learn from past mistakes and I’m grateful for all you do!

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      rickpittenger121, totally get how insanely tough it is, and I've been right there in the same boat. You gotta check out Coach Lee's "Emergency Breakup Kit." It's an awesome guide that'll save you from feeling totally lost in this crazy time. It tackles all sorts of situations and gives you strategies you never even considered. You can find it at myexbackcoach.com/ebk. Seriously, I'm rooting for you and hoping it works wonders!
      C

  • @Socoolral
    @Socoolral Рік тому +18

    Coach Lee,
    You couldn’t imagine how much these videos have been helping me. Although there has been zero contact from both sides, I know listening to your advice is the right thing to do. Thank you

  • @jbougger
    @jbougger Рік тому +25

    The part that got me to not reach out again was when I accepted that the final outcome is that at some point there will come a time where I will never see her again. Reaching out might lead to a couple of non-committed conversations, but all it does is delay that final outcome. She's gone. If she still wanted to be with you (me), she still would be.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      jbougger, Obviously you reached out to her, but there may still be another solution. Join Coach Lee's Workshop. It will help you more than you know. know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

  • @mictrap1383
    @mictrap1383 Рік тому +60

    Doesn't matter the time frame 2 weeks or 1 year if they don't you don't

    • @MVProfits
      @MVProfits Рік тому +10

      Nope. Even Lee says that it can make sense to break NC, but only after AT LEAST 45-60 days. Ego and what is effective are two different things.

    • @lilliankillian7366
      @lilliankillian7366 Рік тому +2

      Wow ty for that. It does help

  • @dominikwolski9577
    @dominikwolski9577 Рік тому +8

    Thank you, Coach Lee, I am just having one of those terrible days when every little thing reminds me of her and the urge to reach out is almost unbearable. Needed to hear you say loud and clear that it cannot be one-sided.

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  Рік тому +3

      It absolutely cannot and should not ever be.

  • @SkullObsessed69
    @SkullObsessed69 8 місяців тому +4

    My therapist recommended reaching out as a means of apologizing for the ways I sabotaged the relationship, which my subconscious took as an excuse to talk to her again. All I hit her with was "hey", but the wave of guilt and regret that hit me immediately after pressing send was incredible. After focusing on myself more, I realize whether she comes back or not, I can't do anything until I've let her go and held myself tighter. The only way out of a breakup is through it with yourself, stay strong people.

  • @Karl-wx8zx
    @Karl-wx8zx Рік тому +22

    Don’t do it trust me, it seems like you can just talk to them because breakup can feel like just another argument that you can work thru but it really isnt, same rules about communication and listening and mutual work no longer apply!
    When I did it seemed to be working at first but very quickly turned into such an uphill battle that I got too stressed and felt like I had to walk on the eggshells not to say the wrong thing at a wrong time. Just accept that you’re not wanted at the moment and if they reach out then you can slowly build it up, if you’re doing most of the work it’s only gonna end up with them rejecting you again if you reach out too early

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      Karl-wx8zx, I want to recommend this for you to help you.
      I know it's very tough and I've certainly been there. I want to suggest that you consider Coach Lee's "Emergency Breakup Kit." It's such a good guide to help you so that you aren't just wondering on your own. It covers a lot of situations and has strategies that you probably haven't thought of. The link for it is myexbackcoach.com/ebk. I wholeheartedly recommend it and wish you the very best of luck.

    • @doglover5519
      @doglover5519 3 місяці тому

      This is exactly what happened when we got back together.

  • @xcoachkim
    @xcoachkim Рік тому +10

    Love your words Lee and I agree with what you've said that negative outcomes from reaching out significantly outweigh positive ones.

  • @MattKimura
    @MattKimura Рік тому +7

    This video made me realize that my ex doesn't miss me since she never reached out after 7 months of no contact. So I just need to move on and forget about it.

  • @user-nr2ku9dk9b
    @user-nr2ku9dk9b Рік тому +16

    She left me for another guy (admittedly after being an absent partner). I went no contact for about 3 months and she reached out and asked how i was doing. I ignored it. She texted me 3 weeks after that and said "im nothing and worthless. I think about you a lot and miss you". I ignored it. Then i discovered coach lee who says not to ignore when they reach out. So.... I reached out. 6 weeks after her last text, I say "hey i got your last message. Im doing well and i hope youre feeling better."
    She responded quickly. Showed off her new puppy and even said "just an offer but if you want to meet him you can." I said maybe someday. She continued the conversation and I responded with an emoji to cut the conversation. I tread lightly.
    Im okay with it. Back to no contact we go.

    • @JKNat9004
      @JKNat9004 Рік тому +5

      👍 Good luck. Sounds like you're paying attention to Coach Lee's words..

    • @the_professional007
      @the_professional007 Рік тому +2

      He is moving on with his life and he is doing great 😊

    • @Capory
      @Capory Рік тому +1

      Strooooong 💪🏻

    • @Enjoycapetownbysara
      @Enjoycapetownbysara Рік тому +5

      But you want her back or not? I don’t get it from your reaction to her 😅

    • @user-nr2ku9dk9b
      @user-nr2ku9dk9b Рік тому +2

      @@Enjoycapetownbysara yeah. I don't know how it's possible to get back together at this point, but I miss her every day. It'd be nice to hear from her.

  • @Kevin-fb3ie
    @Kevin-fb3ie 11 місяців тому +3

    Not going to lie, I’ve always thought these videos where jokes. When my now ex decided to end our relationship via text on New Year’s Day I was very disappointed by the way she did it and reasons of having no time for a relationship. My first instinct was to reach out to her, but after watching these videos and taking advice from friends, our last message was hers, on New years Day. Your videos are absolutely powerful and keeping me strong through this process. Thank you.

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  11 місяців тому

      Yes, show her you aren’t going to chase and pursue her. Keep your dignity. It’s worth it. And then when/if she reaches out, take it slow.

  • @rolienchiru211
    @rolienchiru211 9 місяців тому +3

    Yes exactly... Don't never try reaching ur ex who walk away.. It will push her more... It's better stay silent n look someone new. 😊

  • @dulce_de_leche
    @dulce_de_leche Рік тому +8

    i remember watching coach lee's videos all the time when i first got broken up with, and although it was hard, his advice helped me remain in no contact with my ex. now it's been about a month and a half, and i've come to realize even though my ex hasn't reached out yet, i honestly don't even want him back anymore. like he dumped me over the phone in two minutes... that's something a little teenage boy does, not a grown ass man in graduate school. no contact really is a win/win situation, and although it may not feel that way right now, you might come to the realization you really don't even want that person.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      dulce_de_leche when I found Coach Lee years ago, I binged on his videos for a long time. To be honest, I lost track of time.

    • @doglover5519
      @doglover5519 3 місяці тому

      Thanks. I needed to hear that.

  • @Steven-L
    @Steven-L Рік тому +27

    This video came at the right time, thanks coach Lee! I've been asking myself if I should reach out & I almost did a few times, glad I didn't. Staying strong in no contact & it is hard at times

    • @YheWebb_
      @YheWebb_ Рік тому +3

      same here im struggling its been a month :(

    • @jonhysimonzreactionz1326
      @jonhysimonzreactionz1326 Рік тому +1

      @@YheWebb_ I know how you feel..but gotta resist ! 💪 let the Universe do its magic ! ✨

    • @YheWebb_
      @YheWebb_ Рік тому

      @@jonhysimonzreactionz1326 thank you for the encouragement! you commented in the right time. Im feeling so low now.

  • @RezaBarzegar-e4m
    @RezaBarzegar-e4m Рік тому +4

    coach lee you touch on subjects that other coaches don't even know or atleast won't give up for free, thank you for all your wise words

  • @sjklfnegsdrno
    @sjklfnegsdrno Рік тому +13

    I reached out recently, against my better judgement, after almost 2 months of no contact. He was warm, hinted that he missed me and regretted the break-up. But did he move towards getting back together? NO!!! So listen to Coach Lee, be patient, stay strong, focus on your life, take care of yourself and find other ways to soothe your anxiety and pain.

    • @sloanmagnum5009
      @sloanmagnum5009 Рік тому +4

      For most people, the idea of getting back together sounds better than actually getting back together. A lot of people just want to see if they "still have you" but don't actually want you anymore. They just want to know if you've moved on yet.

  • @Rezifying_
    @Rezifying_ Рік тому +4

    Thank you Coach Lee, I really needed this. It's been 4 months, I know this will fade, I'll be okay, I'll persevere.

  • @cyberaga20
    @cyberaga20 Рік тому +10

    It breaks my heart to hear that long distance relationships don’t work when getting your ex back. I am almost 3 hours away via public transport from my boyfriend. He left me 3 weeks ago because he felt that the distance was putting a strain on our relationship. We’ve been together for 2 and a half years and has amazing times together. The pain in my heart feels like it’s going to kill me. I’m so sad and fed up

    • @OilCanHarry2U
      @OilCanHarry2U Рік тому +1

      That is very tough, and I hear your pain. Please be gentle on yourself.

    • @yeuruuerueeheue
      @yeuruuerueeheue Рік тому

      it will not kill you.

    • @xcoachkim
      @xcoachkim Рік тому +3

      So true. I've had long distance relationships in the past and I know they are so heartbreaking and take a lot to make it work. I completely understand the difficulty you're facing so I want to recommend Coach Lee’s live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It is really transformative! The workshop is for saving your relationship after a breakup or separation (or if it looks like one is coming). You’ll also have a coaching call every month for 6 months so you won’t be left alone to handle this yourself. I suggest getting more information about it. You can schedule an appointment to discuss at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I genuinely believe this experience will be enlightening and immensely valuable for you.

  • @Meee908
    @Meee908 Рік тому +5

    Y’all better listen to coach lee, talking from experience I didn’t listen to him..I kept begging and pleading and months later I’m here to tell you nothing is changed😅 I wish I listened to him from the beginning, would have saved me my time and energy and of course my dignity.

  • @JoshP86
    @JoshP86 Рік тому +30

    Reach out after 1 year, 6 months of NC? why should we? She didn't care at all 😕

    • @freedomfinancial
      @freedomfinancial Рік тому +1

      In Breakup Kit Lee says that you can reach out after 3-6 months of no contact, because you have not much to lose. If i were you i would have reached out to test the waters, it will either open your way to get ex back, or it will make you sure that it's time to move on. You may become angry that it went bad ( conversation), she might not respond at all, and in my opinion anger is the first step to getting over them. I see that you hold lots of sadness and helplessness in yourself, so reach out and close the chapter/ open a new relationship with her. Tell how it went

    • @philippesales2842
      @philippesales2842 Рік тому +1

      @@freedomfinancial 3 months sounds a bit short to me to be honest. I guess it depends on the length of the relationship, but I would have thought 6 months + was a minimum.

    • @freedomfinancial
      @freedomfinancial Рік тому

      @@philippesales2842 yeah, i would wait around 5-6 months myself i just repeat what coach lee said in his course

    • @amanpradhan5221
      @amanpradhan5221 8 місяців тому

      ​@@freedomfinancial Can you share some more?

  • @KUKUKUKom
    @KUKUKUKom Рік тому +33

    THIS MAN Has saved me.
    I have been the most supportive partner in the relationship, I will always remember what he said- Have faith in whom you were in the relation.
    Looking back- I have had 2 out of 3 exes come back- 1 was she came back after 6 years and one was she came back after 1-1.5years but by then I'd already moved on.
    Hoping history wont repeat as I don't want the collection of exes who came back AFTER i have moved on already,

    • @yeuruuerueeheue
      @yeuruuerueeheue Рік тому +2

      6 years lmaooooo thats crazy

    • @RickySpanish12344
      @RickySpanish12344 Рік тому +1

      Dang you're an Adonis lol. How long were you with these women? That's a long time to wait and wanting you back

    • @RickySpanish12344
      @RickySpanish12344 Рік тому +1

      What made it tough for me is she just ghosted me... There was no fight, no argument... She just cut contact with me leaving me wondering what happened

    • @KUKUKUKom
      @KUKUKUKom Рік тому

      @@RickySpanish12344 the one who came back after 6 years - we were friends for 2-3yrs then dated for 4ish months.
      The one who came back after 1-1.5 years- we dated for 4ish years.
      What i was told in both instances was that just because how i was in relation with them (when in relation i treat my partners how a partner should be); they thought its easy to find good people (men) but when they f'ed around and found out, that made them realize good ppl are actually rare.

    • @KUKUKUKom
      @KUKUKUKom Рік тому

      @@RickySpanish12344 thats what happened in my latest relation.
      But if it wasnt ugly, no fights were there. U were supportive throughout the relationship:- at every stage of life hurdle they will think about you.
      The ex who came back after 6yrs -few months ago (this would have been now 8ish years later) called me and wanted to let me know that she is going to get married and that it was my last chance in case i want her back.

  • @sitmengchue4077
    @sitmengchue4077 Рік тому +9

    Staying away really takes strength. Must be v painful as there is no closure yet. Coach Lee is so right. Tough but no other way.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      sitmebgchue4077, You are absolutely right about staying away. A LOT of people are doing it.know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

    • @sagovana
      @sagovana 6 місяців тому

      He doesn't say to stay away permanently

  • @mictrap1383
    @mictrap1383 Рік тому +33

    Don't do it if she left they have to come back

    • @mariotibbrine1
      @mariotibbrine1 Рік тому +3

      I wouldn't make any real commitment to them if they come back.

    • @thomesc6214
      @thomesc6214 Рік тому +3

      @@mariotibbrine1Solid point

    • @makingmajic1938
      @makingmajic1938 3 місяці тому +1

      ​@mariotibbrine1 they broke it off they have to put in the work to fix it all is fare in love and war

  • @iselarichards
    @iselarichards Рік тому +5

    My ex just contacted me after 5 days of NC, after I begged him for so long, I felt so hurt and a friend referred me to your channel. I immediately started the NC rule even though it was hard but I figured it was more better than being rejected every time I begged. So I stopped begging and followed your advice. Thanks alot coach Lee, you're not only wise but your words are very therapeutic and kind❤.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +1

      Islearichards2, Hi, first of all NEVER beg. Go into NO CONTACT and make sure you don't call him.
      totally get how insanely tough it is, and I've been right there in the same boat. You gotta check out Coach Lee's "Emergency Breakup Kit." It's an awesome guide that'll save you from feeling totally lost in this crazy time. It tackles all sorts of situations and gives you strategies you never even considered. You can find it at myexbackcoach.com/ebk. Seriously, I'm rooting for you and hoping it works

    • @HenriqueMartins.English
      @HenriqueMartins.English Рік тому

      5 days ? Then it was a fake breakup

    • @iselarichards
      @iselarichards Рік тому

      @@HenriqueMartins.English yes ikr!! It wasn't fake or did I just assume it was a break-up?

    • @Meee908
      @Meee908 Рік тому

      For how long did you beg?

  • @deidre4423
    @deidre4423 Рік тому +9

    I had to reach out to my ex. After 47 days, I had to get off of his family’s phone plan & on my own. He offered to help me do this, so we met up today. He started crying at one point saying he’s sad & felt like he let me down. He said he would miss me & still does miss me. It was sad. I comforted him & did not cry myself. Back to no contact for now!

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      deidre4423 Something to help you
      know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

  • @triprussell3
    @triprussell3 Рік тому +1

    After 3 months in the break up, and NC for 17 days, I'm dealing with anxiety attacks/assaults. I've been through some trials and tribulations, but this one really hits the heart hard! However, I'm confident, I will prevail!

  • @mirovierka5136
    @mirovierka5136 Рік тому +6

    Our break up (long distance but intense relationship) happened 6 months ago and I went no contact almost 3 months ago. And it has been such a thrilling experience at the end of the day!! I worked a lot on myself and found many new projects to work on. I also got to know many new people (deepened old bonds as well) and having a very good time right now. I am thankful now that he didnt want me because I feel so good in my skin now. Thank you, coach Lee, (and thanks to my ex as well 😂) your videos have been very inspiring for me. Dont watch them anymore as much as I used to, but from time to time it still reassures me, that the no contact has been a great decision ❤ people, dont give up, keep your self value high. Good luck to you all ✌️

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +1

      mirovierka5136 Thank you so much! Your appreciation for these videos means a LOT to the staff. ❤

    • @luking2644
      @luking2644 Рік тому +2

      Similar story to mine. Never felt better than now, almost like the break-up was a blessing even though it was painful as hell for many months!

    • @h7pubg
      @h7pubg Рік тому +1

      I hate how people dismiss long distance, even my ex almost dismissed it, or like gaslighting me by implying i shouldn’t care because it was long distance, despite us talking every day for 5 years, and doing amazingly in real life, and being that I started younger, I was finally near a point I could save to move there

    • @mirovierka5136
      @mirovierka5136 Рік тому

      @@h7pubg 5 years of long distance is quite e lot. But maybe you were just the exception from the rule. Are you still together?

    • @h7pubg
      @h7pubg Рік тому

      @@mirovierka5136 no, after just short of 5 years she left. when things started falling apart that’s when she started trying to make it sound like it shouldn’t matter because it was long distance, which was very sad to me, in general that sentiment is sad because i feel like people are telling me to get over it and it shouldn’t mean as much because it was long distance, but it did, we talked every day about so many things for all of those years.

  • @richardcollins586
    @richardcollins586 Рік тому +10

    Pride and self respective won’t let me. I think it’s so demeaning to reach out to someone who can’t be bothered to reply to a simple how are you. About 65 days in now.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      richardcollins586, I know how you feel. I've been there too! totally get how insanely tough it is, and I've been right there in the same boat. You gotta check out Coach Lee's "Emergency Breakup Kit." It's an awesome guide that'll save you from feeling totally lost in this crazy time. It tackles all sorts of situations and gives you strategies you never even considered. You can find it at myexbackcoach.com/ebk. Seriously, I'm rooting for you and hoping it works wonders!

  • @frederickmartinez3075
    @frederickmartinez3075 Рік тому +1

    Coach Lee Is Right, She broke up with me, I gave her the space
    Only reach out because we were financially attached to something. Wanted to help because I knew she would Struggle, She kept posting on social media bout healing, while I stayed silent. It got to a point where I brought it up to her because I told her these post aren’t helping me because I’m Also healing, I get it but please stop making it public, I let out all the frustration and I regret it after.
    Whatever you do please don’t reach out, We got this

  • @arr204
    @arr204 Рік тому +5

    If you are in NC…and eventually it just turns into never hearing from them, consider it a blessing. Unfortunately, you’re not meant to be, and that’s ok. Move on and find something better.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      aliciarussell2641 Just in case he DOES come back, there's a great workshop for you.know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

  • @betiboo251
    @betiboo251 Рік тому +6

    Listen to coach Lee. I've been there few times with same guy and I deeply regret making same mistake again and again. My ex was glad to hear from me (once bad emotions faded away) but for him it was just an ego boost so guess what happened next? Yes, ghosted.

  • @marcarkam5521
    @marcarkam5521 Рік тому +3

    Mister Lee I've learned a lot from you. You're just amazing. Don't ever chase

  • @khadijahnyabinghi
    @khadijahnyabinghi Рік тому +21

    No. Ladies, let him reach out to you. Coach Lee, thank you for your great work. I love your delivery. Great video as usual.

  • @mysterio5837
    @mysterio5837 Рік тому +31

    Why would you? Throw that trash away. There's tons of better ppl out there

    • @Erguevo33
      @Erguevo33 6 місяців тому +2

      If it just were that simple

  • @HaydenTucker-n1j
    @HaydenTucker-n1j 4 місяці тому

    My ex and I recently broke up. We had an argument in front of the kids, and she asked me to leave. So I did. We ultimately broke up, where I got the opportunity to say that I didn't want this, but that I love and respect her enough to give her what she wants. We are now in no contact, and I've been blocked from everything. Probably self preservation on her part? Either way, as hard as it is, and as much as I miss her, I'm sticking with it, and started working on myself. Doing hobbies that I had put to one side, seeing people I haven't seen, and just trying to trust the process. I could easily go and see her. Or write. But these videos give me the courage, and the much needed strength to focus on what I need to do, either by myself, or hopefully with her in the future. Keep them coming coach. We need you!

  • @nicholassowell8181
    @nicholassowell8181 4 місяці тому +2

    Three and a half years ago I dated a girl for two days before she broke up with me. We didn’t talk for 2 months and I wanted to reach out. All my friends said not to but I did and we started dating again 2 months later. We dated for three years and broke up 6 months ago. 6 months no contact and reached out just to find out she has a new bf. Went back to square 1 it’s been a month. If anyone tells you they have the answer they’re wrong. Sometimes you just gotta go with your gut. Just make sure you’re ready to hear the worst cause hearing she had someone new felt worse than any other point of the breakup

  • @Aek1985
    @Aek1985 Рік тому +2

    Its my 25 day of no contact coach lee thank you for everything I miss her but I feel better ❤

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      Aek1985, I'm very proud of you, and I know Coach Lee is. He would want you to join his Workshop which is excellent! It's POWERFUL and has strategies that you can't imagine. Been there-I know how tough it can be. Just wanted to give you the heads up about Coach Lee’s live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." Seriously, it's a game-changer! This workshop is all about rescuing your relationship and then keeping your relationship strong after the breakup or separation. Oh, and get this: you'll also have a coaching call every month for 6 whole months! So you won’t be going at it alone or anything. To find out more, hit up Coach Lee's team. You can schedule an appointment to discuss all the details at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. If you do, it will blow your mind and give you the support you need!

  • @themastersdao_twitch5605
    @themastersdao_twitch5605 9 місяців тому +2

    So my friends.... I reached out many Times after the first weeks after the break up. Not only did I got a negative response from her ( I've gotten many) I almost drove myself crazy. You’re bending and breaking yourself to appeal to them alltough most times the only things they want is distance and space... Guys I tell you after the breakup wish her good luck turn away and pursue things that have meaning for you. In the long run the most important person in your life are you. Improve... read, workout , learn, connect and maybe even move on from that person. Don't be as foolish as I was and be dependent on your ex's approval or love. You lived before she/he was in your life and you will after. Good luck. I am two months in and feeling great right now. I know that im moving mountains ins my life and that there is still so much out there for me!

  • @agnespawelec9006
    @agnespawelec9006 Рік тому +4

    Coach Lee you gave me so much strength. I was just about to reach out to my ex today as he said he wants to be friends and he will leave it with me. But after watching this video I will continue NC🙏❤️. I hope you know you are a life saver 🙏

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +1

      agnespawalec9. So, he wants to be friends? That's up to you. Like you said, watch Coach Lee, and see what happens. 👍

    • @agnespawelec9006
      @agnespawelec9006 Рік тому

      @@jannlewandowski5540 I can’t do it. He seems to be so calm and it’s easy for him to move on so quickly as I am in pieces. Can’t sleep, eat, work ext… was going through pictures, videos and decided I have to delete everything including his number on what’s up as I was killing myself. I think I ruined my chances by deleting his number as he can’t see my picture on what’s up and might think I blocked him( I wasn’t aware of how what’s work and only did this to protect myself by not contacting him when I have a weak moment) I send love to everyone who is going through this pain as it is unbearable. I watch coach Lee videos for hours every day. That’s what gives me hope. Have I ruined everything? 😢

  • @jayday187
    @jayday187 Рік тому +8

    STICK WITH NO CONTACT!!
    Resist the urge and any time you feel it just boot up another Lee video.
    I'm in about week 2/3 of NC, haven't been counting. She's still in relief but she's posting and then later deleting bait posts trying to make me jealous, I'm working on seeing my family and friends and to stop looking at her stuff.

  • @Sonyman2000
    @Sonyman2000 Рік тому +6

    My ex gf said she wants space because I was needy and pushing to have a relationship with her right away when we would hang out. As hard as it is to give her space I said ok I respect your wish for space and went no contact. It's been a week so far and I've been doing self help and reading a lot of self help books and working on myself and moving forward in life.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      Sonyman20, you're doing the right thing. No Contact is for thinking, improving, and of course, missing each other. STAY AWAY and show her you're not needy. You'll make it. ❤
      After no contact ,
      I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

  • @FoRealzTho
    @FoRealzTho Рік тому +5

    So it’s kinda of a little off. I been in NC for little over a month my ex reached out and it was going good lots of laughs lots of fun after a couple days she slipped out the words “I love you” and it felt great. Then after a week I feel like I got too attached to quick and maybe overwhelmed her with pressure that oh u said u love me this and that and might’ve created the space between us again. It felt soooo good hearing her say she loves me again and I got flooded with everything from the past again. Just a little tip for everyone that’s here. When they come back remember it’s a new relationship and not a continuation or anything. So when u act like it’s just a comeback and think everything will be the same, it won’t be happy and continue the laughs and fun. Bless everyone and hope everyone has an amazing day

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      FoRealzTho, I have something you will be interested in Been there-I know how tough it can be. Just wanted to give you the heads up about Coach Lee’s live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." Seriously, it's a game-changer! This workshop is all about rescuing your relationship and then keeping your relationship strong after the breakup or separation. Oh, and get this: you'll also have a coaching call every month for 6 whole months! So you won’t be going at it alone or anything. To find out more, hit up Coach Lee's team. You can schedule an appointment to discuss all the details at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. If you do, it will blow your mind and give you the support you need! /rant

  • @roncoluzzi5438
    @roncoluzzi5438 3 місяці тому

    Im 64-dated a woman for 8 mos-she discarded me in May 2024-i was NC for 38 days & i broke NC-we ultimately said HI to each other-i called she would not pick up phone. im 71 days NC today-thank you coach for the videos & all the comments-im working in me & looking forward to the future

  • @CryptoTaurusMoon
    @CryptoTaurusMoon 6 місяців тому +1

    I tried reaching out after a month and a half, that was a bad idea. She was cold as ice. She is a DA and said she loved me and was truly sad at the breakup. If i had kept waiting it would have been the best option. Will never reach out again. Been months since breaking no contact, but she recently unblocked me on FB. Curiosity phase is in affect.
    Stick to no contact!

  • @TarisKit
    @TarisKit 3 місяці тому +2

    This video saved me today

  • @Meee908
    @Meee908 Рік тому +2

    I have commented here earlier, I’m here to comment again. Hahaha whatever lee says is true guys. I have experienced a lot of things and it all comes down to what he has said here.

  • @MegaWam1
    @MegaWam1 7 місяців тому

    You are putting out some good wisdom. I need to watch this several more times. I made contact and she has sent me her current photo and phone number. We live in different states. Going through the divorce was the worst thing in my life. She initiated the divorce. I lost everything to include the kids and paid child support for 12 years. My kids grew up hating me. They have kids and never allowed me to see my grandchildren. You are right, don’t be friends and I am uninvited. I have to be careful and will make me look weak and a stalker. The next move is on me. You are correct, do not move and ignore those voice. I want to learn from other people’s experiences. You are so right! I’m a fool and I need to watch this video again. Humans are so weak. We think there is hope. Look people, there is no hope. If I reach out, I will cause more harm. She tells me she has turned to Jesus. Well heck, man crucified Jesus on the cross. I’m no Jesus Christ, no hero, and no nice guy. I’m just a man that has been burned and I don’t want to ever to be burned again. Let me watch this video one more time!

    • @Monkofthecaribbean
      @Monkofthecaribbean 3 місяці тому

      Never pay child support if you cant see them. Fly and move to another country and your problems are solved. You will find women that are wife material in other countries as well.

  • @GloryCitadin
    @GloryCitadin Рік тому +11

    Hey Coach Lee, could you please make a video on no contact after dating someone for 3 to 6 months period. No official title but working towards something serious. 0 animosity or fights, mybe a bit of jealousy on their end. Break up happened suddenly after everything going well and starting to get closer. Might be an avoidant?

    • @ryanchaney94
      @ryanchaney94 Рік тому +2

      Pretty sure he has a video about short term relationships way back

    • @bnatalie
      @bnatalie Рік тому +2

      Same for me

    • @mkoci37
      @mkoci37 Рік тому +2

      Literally my case, good luck fam

    • @plusone8015
      @plusone8015 Рік тому

      IMHO, 3 to 6 months is when the new relationship phase gives way to the, “how it really is” phase…

    • @xcoachkim
      @xcoachkim Рік тому +1

      I can see you're in a bit of a pickle there. Breakups after a short-term relationship can be a little confusing to navigate especially if we're dealing with someone who has an insecure attachment style. Have dealt with a couple of those myself in the past, I can totally relate. I think you need something more professional and specific that allows enough time for all your specific details to be addressed. For that, I suggest a coaching session with Coach Lee or one of his staff coaches. You can book that with this link: myexbackcoach.com/book-with-coach-lee/

  • @petersonyak8905
    @petersonyak8905 Рік тому +1

    From 4:10 , I been there done that. Coach can I get the tshirt? It happened exactly as you said.

    • @xcoachkim
      @xcoachkim Рік тому

      Sorry to hear that. I know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

  • @MariamJacobs-b6c
    @MariamJacobs-b6c Рік тому +5

    I strictly followed coach advise on NC & not even luk at his statuses!... nd my ex finally reaches out yesterday! After almost 2 months. I did not behave needy in anyway & we had a nice talk. I'm hopefull. Stay strong guys. Ther's truth in Coach Lee's videos! ✅️

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  Рік тому

      Would you please email us at myexbackcoach@gmail.com with a short version of your story? We like to continue researching and hope we can use your story to encourage people without revealing your name or recognizable details. Thank you!

  • @Beaudruid
    @Beaudruid Рік тому +7

    After 45 days of no contact, immediately after the breakup, he sent me a text message asking how I am and telling about his holiday plans. I replied after an hour, casual and friendly. When there was an opportunity I suggested to meet up after our holidays to watch each other’s photos and have a coffee with some sweets. He replied with ‘let’s do that.’ And now I’m backing off again. My anxiety melted and I feel relieved. Thanks so far coach Lee. The last week was super hard and I felt very homesick. No contact works 💕

  • @ShawneeLawrence-pq7tb
    @ShawneeLawrence-pq7tb Рік тому +2

    Coach Lee I have been in no contact for a year. I am taking your advice! I refuse to reach out because he left me. I am not chasing nobody.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +3

      ShawnleeLa, after a year I would definitely get out of the house with my friends and have a good time. The most important thing is NOT to be alone to "think" and stay unoccupied. My friends had to drag me out, but it worked. I also picked up a hobby. Take care of yourself and have some fun going out to dinner, drinks, whatever you like! ❤

  • @Arezoo68688
    @Arezoo68688 Рік тому +3

    Coach Lee your videos are magical! plz share more videos 🙏🙏Your words are healing words.

  • @keepgrowing9941
    @keepgrowing9941 Рік тому +5

    Attendance check: present. I always follow your techniques. Very effective i can attest. Just awhile ago my chatted me, he does actually from time to time. But what i have learned from NC is knowing that i dont what him in my life. But still, i want to watch all your videos ♥️🤗

  • @jonbanks653
    @jonbanks653 Рік тому +4

    I reached out too soon and got friend zoned immediately. I am still praying for her to have a change of heart. It has now been 30 days and I am frankly scared they will never reach out

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +2

      jonbanks653, Jon, this time, go the distance, and see what happens. Relax! Use Coach Lee's videos for Anxiety if you need to. Give her TIME to miss you, and give yourself the time to think. After you complete the no contact, Coach Lee has a workshop that would be very helpful to you.
      know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

    • @Funaabas
      @Funaabas Рік тому +1

      You got this!

    • @jonbanks653
      @jonbanks653 Рік тому

      @@jannlewandowski5540 Thank you

    • @blueflame3531
      @blueflame3531 Рік тому +3

      Bro, suffer for a month. Go to the gym, and accept reality. It's over.

  • @kynanfernandez7898
    @kynanfernandez7898 Рік тому +1

    Can you give a guide line on how long a reset button could take coach lee

  • @jackspeakman617
    @jackspeakman617 Рік тому +7

    My ex cheated on me with her ex and when she told me, I forgave her easily, she done it again. I forgave her again. she dumped me a month later. All the normal excuses. Obviously from attraction loss from not respecting myself and walking away the 1st time she done it. I’m a forgiving person. But damn I need to learn more self respect and boundaries. Maybe if I did. She wouldn’t have lost attraction

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      jackspeakman6, a lot of people make that same mistake, but you learn from it.
      I know it's very tough and I've certainly been there. I want to suggest that you consider Coach Lee's "Emergency Breakup Kit." It's such a good guide to help you so that you aren't just wondering on your own. It covers a lot of situations and has strategies that you probably haven't thought of. The link for it is myexbackcoach.com/ebk. I wholeheartedly recommend it and wish you the very best of luck.

  • @devon6257
    @devon6257 Рік тому +10

    I reached out after 6 months we had a good conversation but didn’t get back together. I’ll check on her a few times but we don’t say much to each other. It’s weird because we had such a good conversation but it didn’t really mean anything at least to her.

    • @sauron7175
      @sauron7175 Рік тому +7

      I'm sorry man, I know they can be cold but they are doing you a favor, I'm learning too as it's only been a month but I'm going on without her, it's just life man you don't need to forget about the good times just appreciate them and make new ones with someone better.

    • @dprankster18
      @dprankster18 Рік тому +2

      Bro dev did you invite her to talk in person eight away so convo is in person?

    • @devon6257
      @devon6257 Рік тому +2

      @@sauron7175 exactly once you get to the point where you realize you deserve to be happy too than it will get easier. After a year and some months I just had enough of it.

    • @devon6257
      @devon6257 Рік тому +1

      @@dprankster18 no I could just tell that she was moved on when we talked. No anger or animosity she was just not interested in rekindling and probably never will be and that’s ok.

    • @dprankster18
      @dprankster18 Рік тому +1

      My brother would it had been better if she picked up your call and you use that opportunity to get together? Talk in person?

  • @teachandlearn7665
    @teachandlearn7665 2 місяці тому

    Watever happens Coach Lees advice is valuable...atleast u vl walk head high

  • @WolfordWise
    @WolfordWise Рік тому +2

    My ex left me 3 months ago and quickly had another man in her life. She reached out after 2 months and was broken. Talked to me for 3 weeks and said she loved me but wasn't in love. I pushed the idea of a relationship and she blocked me again after another week. Even if only for you... stay no contact and DO NOT push for the relationship right away if they do reach out. Complete wrong choice.

  • @jimdrake268
    @jimdrake268 10 місяців тому

    Could you make a video about attachment styles and how they may effect no contact?

  • @SCnative64
    @SCnative64 6 місяців тому +1

    Folks, Coach Lee speaks the truth. It's tough love. I reached out once and the response I got was pretty harsh and included things like "You only talk about your pain, what about me?" and "You think it's easy for me?" and "I would have known you are in pain even if you had not said it".
    So I wrote another letter, through reflection and honesty, and a better understanding of how SHE felt and even how she may feel now. I have not sent it and may not for months. But Coach Lee is correct - if you're going to reach out, talk about how THEY felt, even if you are in deep pain. They probably already know you are in pain. Apologize sincerely if you can. Don't make it about you, make it about them for the most part.
    One more thing. If you're not ready to get No response, or a harsh response or a very short/trite response like "Thanks" or "Thanks for the Thought" to what you feel is a long, eloquent, honest, heartfelt letter, then don't send it. If you're not emotionally ready to hear something like "I've moved on and please don't contact me again" OR "I'm with someone else and please leave me alone" for God's sake don't send it! Me, I'm most definitely not ready for that. And it sucks that it seems like we need to kind of forget about them or become a bit indifferent ourselves to someone that was so important to us to not be hurt by them - even if WE did the breakup or breakups. Ugh. Coach Lee, what do you think?

  • @JupiterWaltz
    @JupiterWaltz Рік тому +3

    I posted this in another videos but i gladly ask some thoughts even here.
    Long story very short: dated an FA for 4 months and had a panic attack one night, she BU with me after 5 days. I gave her time and space during the dating saying things like: "with your time, don't worry". We were really into each other and cared for each other (little gifts, things and other stuff). I was calm and collected using "I" statements during the BU talk. I told her that i respected her decision and also told her that i wanted my things back and she could give it to our friend (F) in common. Her best friend and one of my dearest friend. Also i never obliged her to do something she would not want to do. Next week will be 3/4 weeks of no contact. If you have any questions about the dating i will gladly answer.
    So yesterday i saw her best friend and she gave me my stuff back and i gave her hers back. I told her about how i felt about this dating and she also said something. She said that panic attack was the trigger, but now she is very very calm because i gave her space and i was calm, soft and collected at the "talk". She had past trauma with her last relationship, she lived in symbiosis with her ex and she always hanged out with him and his group of friends. She was scared that she might fall again in this. She never knew any of my closest friends by the way. She also said to me that my ex dating really really enjoyed this dating and that in my ex dating point of view we had a ton of COMPLICITY. It was a great great dating and she felt great. When i said at the end that i was open to talk to her again she immediately said: "well you can send her a message next week, not now because she knows that we met each other this week". She even told me: "If you think it's worth,you should definitely give it a shot" and "don't jump instantly saying you want to fix things, just some light messages. Remember also to stop messaging her after 3/4 text of her, answer back after a day or two". I was delighted hearing this. I answered back saying: "if you said to stop and not try to reach out to her i would defenetly not try, but you are saying this so ok". She insisted in trying. Next week is around the 3/4 weeks of no contact mark. Is it good that her best friend told me these things? What should i do?

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +1

      JupiterWaltz. Do not contact her or see her.. She's seeing someone else.
      You shouldn't be listening to her friends either. Good luck.

    • @JupiterWaltz
      @JupiterWaltz Рік тому +1

      @@jannlewandowski5540 Oh, and what made you think about this? I'm just curious.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +1

      ​@JupiterWaltz If you listened to other Coach Lee's videos, he does state to be careful what you tell friends, including BEST friends. They don't mean to do anything to hurt you, but they talk about the relationship and how YOU'RE doing, how much you miss them, etc. I heard this a few years ago, and Coach Lee knows his stuff!
      That's all I meant by my statement. Keep your feelings to yourself. Take care and Good luck to you.

    • @JupiterWaltz
      @JupiterWaltz Рік тому

      ​@@jannlewandowski5540 Thank you for your reply. Yeah i know, in fact i told her that i don't miss her and i don't need her and i'm feeling good, i only told her how things went during this dating and that also in my opinion was great and at the end i said i was open to talk. Just that. She does not know anything else. I'm taking care of myself day after day.

  • @signsignsign74
    @signsignsign74 Рік тому +9

    Why would you want to be with someone who does not want you? Move on and find someone who wants to keep you in their life.

    • @JKNat9004
      @JKNat9004 Рік тому +6

      Easier said than done, when you've invested so much of yourself in long term relationship.

    • @beautifullove320
      @beautifullove320 Рік тому +1

      ⁠@@JKNat9004 exactly what you said 👍.Not everyone is in the same situation for one to determine “why would you want … this that in the other ?!” … “Find better “ … yadda yadda yadda. Sometimes people go through different emotions that causes people to break up , pertaining to life in general. Doesn’t mean the dumper or vice versa is a HORRIBLE person per se, or one doesn’t want the other. Some people just aren’t ready given some circumstances. And the heart wants what the heart wants -PERIOD. People should just stop projecting the “why would you????” And focus on their own situation(s). So I completely agree.

  • @gem.17.71
    @gem.17.71 Рік тому +5

    My ex is a covert narcissist! He discarded me for a new supply and it's been 5 months and 2 days of NC. He and the new supply blocked me in FB. I don't even know her! 😳

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому +6

      gem.17.79 You DON'T want to be with a narcissist! I know, I've been there. They are TOXIC, and not only do they have no empathy, they cheat, lie, etc..I spent 5 years with one, and I nearly died. I was Hospitalized with severe stomach problems. Take my word, run away. ❤❤

  • @ryanminor2334
    @ryanminor2334 Рік тому +1

    Coach Lee, I purchased your emergency kit and ive been in no contact for 2 weeks. However, I received important mail of my ex-girlfriend’s and called her to meet up half way to give her back her mail. I kept the conversation on the phone short and casual. I’ll be meeting up with her Thursday and we’ll be meeting at a park with my dog for a little bit. My plan is to keep it casual not beg and plead, just give her the mail let her she our dog because she wanted to see it then when I leave, I’ll say “Hey Jen, It was really great seeing you again. I’ll see you when, I see you.” If closing with that sounds horrible, let me know.
    I was with my ex for a little over 2 years and we’ve lived in 3 different places, bought a dog and have been through the good and bad.
    To let you know the whole situation, me and my girlfriend broke it off 4 months ago mainly because of problems I had and I lied to her about something for a year. However, we stayed away from each other for a month then hooked up for 3 months which I regret, because honestly I couldn’t bare being without her so I went along with it. As of 2 weeks ago, she we meet up and I expressed how much I missed her and wanted to keep improving myself. She then said “thanks for letting me know Ryan, but it’s too late right now” she said this with tears.
    I said ok, then walked away. This month she just got in a relationship with a guy she’s only known for a week. He’s in the same career field as her and has similar interests. It definitely worries me. After I meet up with her Thursday I plan not to contact her anymore. Give me pointers if you can about the meet up I’ll have with her Thursday. Thanks for giving great advice.

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  Рік тому +1

      Why wouldn’t you just forward her mail yo her or put it in a package and mail it? Join my support community to talk about this with my coaches and me - LoveDynamics.com

  • @Chad123-g3d
    @Chad123-g3d Рік тому +1

    Your best video so far ❤❤❤

  • @polished_woman
    @polished_woman Рік тому +2

    I did NC with my ex and he reached out after a week… We are now back together. Listen to Coach Lee, never reach out first. Let them come to you!

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      naomielean. Congrats!
      I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

  • @IcyZebra-223
    @IcyZebra-223 6 місяців тому

    a video about what to do if u accidentaly ignored ur ex and then reached out but didnt hear what u expected would be so helpfull to me he said ''whos this?'''

  • @chrismoemohammed4584
    @chrismoemohammed4584 6 місяців тому

    This video saved me at the last minute. Thank you coach Lee I ALMOST BROKE AND LITERALLY WAS ABOUT TO SEND MY EX A DM FROM AN OLD INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT! (I am blocked on everything)

  • @MrC5vette
    @MrC5vette 3 місяці тому

    Thank you, Lee. I needed to hear that it’s been almost 9 months and no contact hasn’t worked yet. I don’t look for her to come back so be it.😢 PS I’ve moved on the door is closed.

  • @elharrop
    @elharrop Рік тому +1

    Coach Lee is the relationship master! I know that if you need to apologise that you should. The difficulty I'm having is whether apologising to someone a year after a situationship would be weird and creepy. The breakup definitely wasn't all my fault, he certainly did some triggering things which caused me to overeact but I'm just wondering if taking responsibility for my part in things would make any difference or if I'd just be embarrassing myself. I guess I've got nothing to lose at this point.

  • @JenniferGriffin-n2g
    @JenniferGriffin-n2g Рік тому +1

    So how I am doing I am not in contact with him and I don’t call or text coach lee I hope I am doing the right thing

  • @JorvalProperties
    @JorvalProperties 4 місяці тому

    Coach Lee. Have been following you and thank you.
    Question: went to no contact, 5 days later she reached out asking if I wanted to meet up that day. I said I couldn’t and reached out to her 2 days later but In those 2 days she found out a hosted a small get together with friends and now she is upset about it and doesn’t want to meet any longer.

  • @wandayarbrough
    @wandayarbrough Рік тому +5

    After 19 months of no contact I don't think so. Why would I? I did everything for him. Nothing wrong to him. He couldn't see it. He Hopefully will get better one day. I wish him the best. Our old connection is still hurting some mainly because I can't find these in a new guy. I miss the old him. But I guess it was a illusion of who I thought he was.

    • @theprincesgirldm8414
      @theprincesgirldm8414 Рік тому +1

      Your words of "the illusion of who I thought he was" made me feel like perhaps he was a narcissist so, do Google it as it can help you figure out the ways you can heal and get closure on your own.

  • @olivergo7598
    @olivergo7598 Рік тому +3

    Screw ex. If your in one sided relationship, walk away! No one is perfect but you are in the only one is putting the work and effort and she is none and treat you badly then F’k them. Focus yourself exercise a lot it will help a lot. Time will get better and you will find better someone out there.

  • @TSWaves1
    @TSWaves1 Рік тому +5

    Coach, I just hit the 2.5 month mark. A while ago I made a comment to see if I should reach out and you said to give it at least 2.5 months.
    It's been absolutely radio silent but I'm proud of the work I've put in and personal growth. Do you still recommend zero contact? I've juggled the idea of a brief light text or even an email taking some responsibility. Need your advice here. I'm proud though I went NC the day after my breakup text.
    Everyone, it gets easier just stay focused. They may not reach out like mine, but I'm a stronger man today.

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Рік тому

      TSWaves1 Been there-I know how tough it can be. Just wanted to give you the heads up about Coach Lee’s live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." Seriously, it's a game-changer! This workshop is all about rescuing your relationship and then keeping your relationship strong after the breakup or separation. Oh, and get this: you'll also have a coaching call every month for 6 whole months! So you won’t be going at it alone or anything. To find out more, hit up Coach Lee's team. You can schedule an appointment to discuss all the details at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. If you do, it will blow your mind and give you the support you need!

    • @sabrinacnz8507
      @sabrinacnz8507 Рік тому

      any update?@@nikeanabella

  • @jkn5777
    @jkn5777 10 місяців тому +1

    Thank You so very much (×) 100! I've never come across your channel before (wish I had way earlier in life) (would of saved a lot of heartache) but now that I have, I wanted to say Thank You for putting everything in perspective. I gave them their space & although the no contact stage was very painful, my person did eventually reach out. Appreciate your teachings.

  • @stephencosta7219
    @stephencosta7219 10 місяців тому

    Yes Lee
    I did all the wrong things as I was anxious and insecure. Kept reaching out even spoke to her daughters about her behaviour and tracked her as I became distrustful. I am now on now contact and hoping it’s not too late 😢

  • @operationgetthugs232
    @operationgetthugs232 Рік тому +5

    Don't get a third party involved