The Science of Social Interaction | Sci Guys Podcast
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- Опубліковано 9 вер 2024
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Luke takes the reins this week to guide us through transactional analysis, the pop psychology of social interaction...
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References & Further Reading
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• Transactional Analysis...
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I think Luke’s inner child is very excited about transactional analysis
I'm kind of surprised you guys have done a better help partnership even after everything that's come out about how they allegedly treat their providers, or how some providers may or may not have licenses. Or even the alleged misleading marketing and advertising they do.
exactly what i was thinking! i just commented too. i’d love to know more about what they’ve done, but i don’t want to know from people who are getting paid to promote them (as much as i love these guys)
@@underscoreannie Mikey Atkins is actually a therapist who has made videos critiqueing them before! I'm not sure how many of any of the videos are still up but I highly recommend them and their videos about better help if you would like to learn more about their shady practices
I've seen quite a few British peeps take betterhelp sponsorships recently.
I wonder if there's a difference between betterhelp US and betterhelp UK in the way they handle things? Different regulations perhaps?
I opened my notifications this morning and yelled "TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS FINALLY" and now my family is concerned
I always saw psychology as a left leaning field. It's about objectively viewing the world. It's about understanding why people do the things they do. It's about helping others and making the world a better place. It's about listening to people and validating their feelings. People on the right tend to look at themselves, and a psychologist who looks at themselves won't be able to properly help others. It requires a lot of altruism to be a psychologist
haven’t watched the whole episode, but isn’t betterhelp supposed to be dodgy? i’ve heard so much controversy about them last year saying some therapists are unresponsive, telling people to go elsewhere when they’re supposed to help people, and selling data to third parties. if anyone has anymore info on this pls lemme know lol. cannot wait to finish the video though, love this podcast:)
My inner child is taking a nap right now after a long weekend of trying new things (not always very smartly)
So, what do you call it when your parent thinks it’s weaponized incompetence when it’s really that when you attempt to do a chore you get a full yelling lecture on every little way you didn’t do it right, which last for a considerable time, and when you just don’t do it, they do it themselves and only yell at you for not doing the thing, which is less yelling, and less effort over all.
Weaponised Psychiatry?
You just described my mom 😂! As a result, I became a rather messy adult, not by lazyness but because I still have a lingering fear of "not doing it right" or "I might break something or make it worse".
@@Johnny_T779 I’m physically disabled on top of it all so my relationship dynamic isn’t going to change anytime soon. But personally I view it as min/maxing effort x intrusive noise with a side dose of managing guilt of not doing enough and fear of failure. From my view point we each have different standards of cleanliness and if your current condition bothers you, then the only scientifically studied way to buy happiness is to pay someone to do chores you don’t enjoy. Now if I could just get my mom to go on vacation so I can employ that method without her calling out my ‘cheating’😭
This made me think of ask/guess culture and the different feelings around the way things are asked!
Just seen the pronouns and I genuinely screamed like a banshee. As a small child every mention of pronouns, gender and sexuality made me so happy. My inner child loves being an open non-binary person finally
I wouldn't say the (usually male) half of the relationship doing weaponized incompetence necessarily puts on a voice and vocalizes the thing. Mine just continues to do things wrong until I stop expecting him to do it right and just do it myself. People always tell me just stop doing X for him and eventually he'll have to do it. No, no he won't.
He won't clean the dishes if I stop. He'll find something else that's not a dish to serve the same purpose. Who suffers? Me. The one who will eventually wash a dish because the lid off who knows what is not a dish.
He won't learn to put his dirty laundry where it goes and wash it more often if I make everything on the floor disappear. He'll just re-wear stinky, dirty socks. Who suffers? Me, because his socks are swampy enough after the first round in his work boots and he doesn't smell it but I can smell him entering the room.
At one point in our relationship he was down to 3 pairs of boxers that hadn't turned themselves into the world's loosest g-strings with age and if he hadn't got more for Christmas that year he'd still be pretending his dwindling collection of stringy boxers was fine.
Is this hypothetical or real? He must be amazing in other ways for you to be with him, right? Is it not infuriating being with an adult like this? Please explain, I genuinely don’t get it!
dump him. do it now
@@jessilovely No, it's real. I'm still here putting up with it because I'm a continent away from my own family and we've got a kid. I would not emotionally survive co-parenting with the BS his family would put me through with no support of my own, so I remind myself of the man I fell in love with and the fact that I can leave whenever I'm ready. I went back to school recently and I've got a year left. I'm coming off 6 years of being a stay at home mom with no social network of my own and getting ready to dive back into career mode which will come with a built in social network and social opportunities.
@@JennaGetsCreative im rooting for you and wish you the best❤ just wanted to say that my dad was very much like your husband for about thirty years while he was with my mum but miraculously learned to do laundry and discovered the clothes shops once theyve separated so it really only was about -surprise!- not wanting to do those things and having mum do them for him. all im saying is there is hope for the both of you and i really hope your situation will improve soon!
Wishing you the best ❤ Not that you should care, but he will realise what he had when he no longer has it. You are not a doormat. Your child will respect you when they’re old enough to understand if they don’t already. Also rooting for you, Jenna!@@JennaGetsCreative
Indirect communication is awful from an autistic perspective. It makes me brain go too fast and I come up with like 100 questions. I think too hard and freeze. And people go "well why can't you intuitively do that?" Well I did come to the conclusion you were probably asking me to do it but then I had like 90 other thoughts and I couldn't figure out which thing was the point
My inner child wantd to listen to Star Wars VI on audio cassette (and follow along with the included booklet).
Hello, I'm also a John 😁! Seriously, the missing reaction to the nudist neighbour would be laughing. I would just burst out laughing and having a hard time to stop! I just love silly things like that, when life looks like a Monty Python episode 😂!
Ive been waiting for this episode for a while bc Luke kept mentioning this and i tried to look it up but didnt get too far so now im really glad that you covered it on the pod🎉 i also loved how it was essentially very similar to the usual episodes where Cory does the research and the talking and Luke keeps interrupting, now it was the other way around :DD it also really got me thinking so thanks for that as well❤
18:57
I just realized that I have been conditioned to not lie. My dad has always been against lieing and would treat even a little fib with the upmost importance. I talk my way around telling any lie constantly.
Welp thanks dad 🎉
before I say anything, I just wanna state that I absolutely love this show and wouldn't drop it just because of a bad sponsership. I wonder whether or not you guys have seen the multiple criticisms Better Help has received. It's amazing that Luke has had a positive experience with Better Help, and I'm happy for him, but that company is SHIT. There are a lot of videos and articles out there explaining how horrible that plataform is. I don't understand how youtubers keep suporting them
Girls gotta eat lol
They probably haven’t heard, first I’m hearing of it tbh and I did have a bad experience with better help. Is it the company itself that is bad? Because you can get a bad psychiatrist anywhere and I don’t think all the better help therapists would be shit.
@@jessilovelylook it up, it isn’t just a few bad psychiatrists
@@jessilovely They've been accused of not paying therapists appropriately, selling personal health information and their therapists acting super unethically. It's the uber-ification of therapy which hurts therapists and people accessing therapy.
I see. I guess when you turn a service into a fast food massive conglomerate you run the high risk of corruption. We might be hearing of a lawsuit soon or worse, a cancel lmao
I reckon this is a system issue within the company and that you could still occasionally get a good therapist out of it like Luke seems to have. After all, you can get a good teacher out of a shitty education system. But if the poor wages is an issue across the board then I would agree I wouldn’t recommend it. No matter how good they are, who wants a therapist who isn’t paid properly? 😔 If all this is true I’m sure they’ll be exposed soon - new companies are not good at realising you can’t balance greed and efficacy. And a therapy company at that, it’s actually very ironic and hilarious. Better Help [yourself]? Why must your business be huge? 😂 🤷🏽♀ Just chill a bit ffs hahaha@@KathrynsRavens
I'm very intrigued by this topic because I've always had a difficult time "feeling" my "inner child"--personally, I think that's because I started experiencing mental illness very young and, therefore, wasn't a happy kid but, who knows?
So, I'd love to tell you how my inner child is feeling, but I don't know!
I don't have people asking "would you like to", maybe it's a British thing. We more have "Could you please.."
Because no, as such, the task is not something I want to do. But if it's to help someone I love and make their life easier/better, then yes. Because what I want is the latter and the former is a means to get there.
My inner child is feeling very happy today, thanks for asking Luke!
@sciguys Hey I understand that you need to make money but please look into the data breaches and sales by better help. They're sketchy as hell and I hope you don't partner with them in future because I doubt they align with your values.
54:43 i feel like the whole thing of “oh but it can feel rude to tell someone or directly ask them to do something” only makes sense if you have this weird intrinsic sense that you’re not allowed to just say no. i feel like neurotypical people are like a circle of points with a line going through and connecting them while a group of autistics is just individual points that come together to make the shape of a circle.
like you’re not inherently obligated to do something, altho you might want to if it’s a task that we’ve agreed is assigned to you specifically or you just wanna say yes because you care about the one who’s asking
Me, an introvert, watching this video: Hmmm, interesting…
This was a cultish and hurtful family therapy movement. I was a kid in the 70s, my mother glommed on this stuff and suddenly had a full vernacular for insulting all of us with a bonus medicalized authority. She eventually dropped it like she would drop all things when she realized she wasnt successful getting people to do what she wanted them to do. So: yuck.
Weaponized incompetence mark 44:40
One of my fav episodes ❤
what a nasty ad placement with yts new autoplay thumbnails
maybe my inner child is rly chill today, i dont think hes been triggered or anything ao its just the usual lowkey nobody loves me but thats fine
you guys are sitting weird today
Wow Corey, your take on ocd is really horrible 🤯
i feel like he said it clearly is not ocd uh lol
I see how you’d get that from what he said at face value, but I read it as just part of his deadpan humor. They did a full episode on OCD a few years ago, so I think it’s safe to say he has a better understanding of it it than “doing unnecessary silly tasks all the time”.
We’ve done a full episode on OCD.
One of the diagnostic criteria is quite literally performing compulsions (repetitive tasks unrelated to the obsessions) for a significant time (1 hour or more) every day. That’s all that was being referenced there.
@@SciGuys yeah, I know I watched that one and you still said what you said in a real ableist way. When someone with a condition says hey that wasn’t funny that was hurtful, saying ‘I did an episode on it’ doesn’t take away from the hurtful ableist language.
@@basketchaos to a person with ocd, hearing ‘silly little tasks’ can extremely hurtful. Somethings shouldn’t be made into jokes, especially if the joker hasn’t got the condition. It’s ableist.