You’re seen! Thank you for the video, I noticed you were more expressive than in previous videos which also speaks as much as the words themselves and gives extra insight. I find some commonalities here as you describe some situations similarly to how I experience them(internally). I am in the habit of masking somewhat in order to engage in basic social expectations as it is pretty much a must in my line of work. However I would much prefer an interesting conversation in the right context over social niceties. The anxiety(an umbrella term for a multitude of factors) surrounding people getting too clingy or placing heavier expectations on me as a friend or hang out buddy results from-not Only the anxiety itself-but the heavy load of work and family obligations that leave me little time or energy to socialize. Do you ever feel that sometimes your social cup is simultaneously empty and overflowing? If that makes sense hehe... Sorry for the long comment
Very cool! I am glad. Long comments welcome. I like to read. And thank you for watching. In the longer form videos, it does take me a little while to warm up, but once I get going, I lose track of time. And then I forget if I sufficiently voiced what I had been meaning to, but I then comfort myself that whatever I didn't capture in whatever instance, perhaps I will have it better refined in another. Thoughts in evolutions. As for the rest of your comment, I will think on it. I want to give it fresh look after a long sleep. I feel I will have more to say than I currently can muster. Probably later this evening. You made some interesting points and it is a thought provoking question.
I woke up and whatever words that I have there lingering at the periphery are not yet ready. I will approach them again at another time, see what I have then. In the meantime, thank you again, have a good night, and have a good tomorrow.
I am looking again......but by now I feel detached from what it was that I had originally been talking about, and am trying to now reconstruct it. For me, this is only (partly) why it sometimes may appear that I am sometimes in a hurry. To get things done, to get things said. Because I might forget. Or I might lose focus. Or I might lose heart. Or energy. Or spoons. But anyway.... I remember enough to go on. And I really like your way of phrasings in your comment. Hmmmmm, perhaps some people are wanting/needing/demanding that others are *supposed* to be the people that they want them to be for them, but also that some people want others to be the people that would *expect* them to be based on superficialities. Within some margin or error based on their own learned or experienced set of biases and prejudices. What their own history has taught them people are like. Or something like that. People should be moreorless like how they appear, and if they aren't, then something is wrong. Something doesn't make sense. If I am an unusual person, I should advertise my unusualness. I really don't understand the rules very well. But apparently, there are rules. I don't ever intend consciously to outright defy convention, but I do inadvertently challenge convention simply by being myself the way that I am naturally. Questioning the accepted status quo and social quo. Nothing too extreme or anything. Some might just think me frustrating to interact with, which is okay with me. I could usually go for less interactions with most people. My diplomacy skills fluctuate from day to day, from encounter to encounter, and person to person. Some people, I tend to just make a not to subtle scene about avoiding all interaction with just so I don't have to feel like I have done something wrong somehow, been something wrong somehow. For them. I feel I have too many people floating around me that require some unknown variable of attention to receive a passing grade of having validated their presence. "Yep, I see you. You are a human too. We are both human." I should wrap this up. And as far as a social cup being either full or empty simultaneously...........I spend the vast greater majority of my time by myself. I do not seek much social. I don't have much family obligation or responsibility. I am, from a societal perspective, alone. But rarely, do I feel lonely, and even rarer am I bored. I do still seek interaction with others though. I do enjoy company. Just not much. I am as alone as I choose. And usually I choose alone, preferring to work in silence. I do visit the outside world though on a semi-regular basis. Just such visits are temporary, and I know my exits. My escape plan. I am working on becoming the person that I want to be. Not the person that others attempt to assign me. Working on being free.
You’re seen! Thank you for the video, I noticed you were more expressive than in previous videos which also speaks as much as the words themselves and gives extra insight.
I find some commonalities here as you describe some situations similarly to how I experience them(internally). I am in the habit of masking somewhat in order to engage in basic social expectations as it is pretty much a must in my line of work.
However I would much prefer an interesting conversation in the right context over social niceties. The anxiety(an umbrella term for a multitude of factors) surrounding people getting too clingy or placing heavier expectations on me as a friend or hang out buddy results from-not Only the anxiety itself-but the heavy load of work and family obligations that leave me little time or energy to socialize. Do you ever feel that sometimes your social cup is simultaneously empty and overflowing? If that makes sense hehe... Sorry for the long comment
Very cool! I am glad. Long comments welcome. I like to read. And thank you for watching. In the longer form videos, it does take me a little while to warm up, but once I get going, I lose track of time.
And then I forget if I sufficiently voiced what I had been meaning to, but I then comfort myself that whatever I didn't capture in whatever instance, perhaps I will have it better refined in another. Thoughts in evolutions.
As for the rest of your comment, I will think on it. I want to give it fresh look after a long sleep. I feel I will have more to say than I currently can muster. Probably later this evening. You made some interesting points and it is a thought provoking question.
I woke up and whatever words that I have there lingering at the periphery are not yet ready. I will approach them again at another time, see what I have then. In the meantime, thank you again, have a good night, and have a good tomorrow.
@@Verge25 Thank you as well for answering. Some very interesting introspection that is contagious! Hehe. Have a good night.
I am looking again......but by now I feel detached from what it was that I had originally been talking about, and am trying to now reconstruct it.
For me, this is only (partly) why it sometimes may appear that I am sometimes in a hurry. To get things done, to get things said. Because I might forget. Or I might lose focus. Or I might lose heart. Or energy. Or spoons.
But anyway.... I remember enough to go on. And I really like your way of phrasings in your comment.
Hmmmmm, perhaps some people are wanting/needing/demanding that others are *supposed* to be the people that they want them to be for them, but also that some people want others to be the people that would *expect* them to be based on superficialities. Within some margin or error based on their own learned or experienced set of biases and prejudices. What their own history has taught them people are like. Or something like that. People should be moreorless like how they appear, and if they aren't, then something is wrong. Something doesn't make sense.
If I am an unusual person, I should advertise my unusualness. I really don't understand the rules very well. But apparently, there are rules. I don't ever intend consciously to outright defy convention, but I do inadvertently challenge convention simply by being myself the way that I am naturally. Questioning the accepted status quo and social quo. Nothing too extreme or anything. Some might just think me frustrating to interact with, which is okay with me. I could usually go for less interactions with most people.
My diplomacy skills fluctuate from day to day, from encounter to encounter, and person to person. Some people, I tend to just make a not to subtle scene about avoiding all interaction with just so I don't have to feel like I have done something wrong somehow, been something wrong somehow. For them. I feel I have too many people floating around me that require some unknown variable of attention to receive a passing grade of having validated their presence. "Yep, I see you. You are a human too. We are both human."
I should wrap this up. And as far as a social cup being either full or empty simultaneously...........I spend the vast greater majority of my time by myself. I do not seek much social. I don't have much family obligation or responsibility. I am, from a societal perspective, alone. But rarely, do I feel lonely, and even rarer am I bored. I do still seek interaction with others though. I do enjoy company. Just not much. I am as alone as I choose. And usually I choose alone, preferring to work in silence. I do visit the outside world though on a semi-regular basis. Just such visits are temporary, and I know my exits. My escape plan. I am working on becoming the person that I want to be. Not the person that others attempt to assign me. Working on being free.