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Man i literally cried the entire time watching this. Thank you I needed to hear this to know I wasn’t going crazy. I get these triggers and can’t breath, I get angry, I cry, I get anxiety attacks and I feel helpless.
If you are feeling your partner might be cheating on you, but there's no definite evidence. You're faced with two alternatives seek out the facts, or to turn a blind eye. Selecting the first choice, although often suitable in the short term, is incredibly damaging for your personally, But for your children and family, not only in the long run too. Seeking the truth out isn't simple either as I mentioned before, technology had made infidelity much easier to conceal than in the past, however it also provides opportunities for revealing getting the evidence needed to establish them & affairs. I hate cheaters, my husband never gave me a reason to be suspicious until I found him and her colleague at a romantic restaurant. They told me it was work stuff but something wasn't right. I was worried until I was introduced to ultimate hack who offer Remote Installation to the his device, They build a web Dashboard for monitoring, 24x7 monitoring (Live GPS), They also gave me full access into the Social apps (Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp, etc. There service is 100 % Anonymous, SHA-256 Encrypted Data, They also recover all Deleted Messages and Data you can contact via gmail ultimatehack003@gmail,com or whatsapp +17202954268 wishing you the best.
@@alysonlentini1615 We actually were on the verge of divorce because of us both cheating. now we have reconciled but we are both dealing with our triggers and learning how to trust again. We are happy we are back together and have been taking the time to communicate our feelings more and even have date night once a week but it is still hard. thanks for responding.
I got to know that my spouse is having an affair through a message on his phone about two weeks ago after being in a relationship for 11 years. He want me to forgive him and remain in the relationship but has now changed the password on his phone. That doesn't make any sense. I am an emotional wreak. I want to make things work but seeing him makes me angry
I was once a victim of heart break. My husband was cheating on me for about 2 years in our marriage. When I became suspicious, he always says that I am looking for excuses since I haven't caught him. But there was allot of red flags and so I talked to a friend. who advised me and connected to some professional. Who helped me uncover everything with proofs, so he can't deny it. I was so devastated when I found out but I am glad I did. Because I was getting so troubled at heart. But after this, I found a way to gain back my inner peace. Sometimes it is better to know than to just keep being troubled at heart. I am happy that I did take those steps.
I’ve never felt more validated in my feelings. Not with my friends, partner, anyone. I finally have clarity on my thoughts and know some steps to take. I never ever thought I’d heal but this gave me hope again. Thank you so much for this.
Yes this is real and is worse when ur husband thinks he is doing everything right and just wants u to move on. And specially gets bothered when u bring it up or get sad
I bet smh i will never trust never been cheated on that i know of .However not looking to be trusted as well if thats case. Not being in relationship and being selfish on your purpose best way
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This was great, thanks, I have been researching "how to move forward in a relationship after being cheated on" for a while now, and I think this has helped. You ever tried - Qenamilla Strayer Magnet - (Have a quick look on google cant remember the place now ) ? Ive heard some unbelievable things about it and my brother in law got excellent success with it.
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I hate all the excuses cheaters have. What about the neglect they do to there wives ? You didn’t slip on a banana peel and fall into some ones bed 😡 it’s a choice. My husband thinks I should just be able to get over his 2 year affair like a light switch. 😡
I needed this, I have watched this so many times it's not even funny. To have someone on this earth that understands how hard it can be is just reassuring. I don't think my wife will ever understand the hurt and pain one goes through with just one act of infidelity let along multiple. You guys are great and I appreciate the time you took to make this video for "ME"!!
This was a blessing on so many levels but here is a point of view not covered. How about the feeling of the one who committed the offense...the brokenness, guilt, shame, the prison depression, conviction was unbarible..I had insomnia, isolation, irritability, my family said I would be in my room for days coming out just to eat and bathe...When the bible says your a slave to it you are! Through Gods grace and alot of tears and repentance we are still together..We both come from broken homes and see the devastation of divorce so that was not a option with our daughter. As a man who nevsr wants to hurt the ones I love the most, it's important to talk about our struggles along with the ones we hurt. Its a every day battle!! Flee sexual Sin! Don't dab, play, think, entertain, watch, it will destroy you and everyone you❤
@Leslie Smith it’s not a cliché but you will get pass the rage anger hurt and betrayal... Holy Spirit brought to my remembrance scripture to meditate on everyday.. which has helped me when triggered.. yes it’s horrible. You will heal it does take time though don’t put yourself under any pressure to put what ever it is behind quickly... allow healing and all questions to be brought to the for front .. most of all Pray!!! & ask for strength and wisdom. 🙏🏾🙏🏾 .. A song has help me tremendously by Casting Crowns titled “ broken together “. May Gods peace rest upon you!!
@@katelyneortiz6602 I would be the wrong person as it turns out, mines a serial cheater, so I'm filling for divorce. 11 years of cheating is not acceptable. I'm sorry I couldn't be of much help
There's no time line. Several years in, way more than five and I still feel like this several days a week. I will add we've been in couples therapy and I've been in personal counseling ever since, all these years. And these things still happen so frequently.
Tho I am in a premarital relationship 2 years long, I have found this video very helpful. I’m the unfaithful here and now I perhaps have a deeper understanding when my gf is going through her day. I’m very fortunate that she’s willing to give it a chance and so this video right here is giving me a better idea on how to make sure she heals in the process. I will now worry about saying specific names, areas, and also avoid certain areas when I’m out
This is the best information about how a betrayed person feels and how the betrayed can deal. I just wish my spouse would watch. Its more important for the person who betrayed to see this and well...let's face it.... they just want to move on. Love what you guys are doing here. Thank u Thank u!
This video right here is literally me all over. As much as I love my husband his serial cheating has affected me deeply where the smallest thing sets me off in feeling stressed, heartbroken plus more. I dont think my husband understands what he's done regardless of me trying to find a way to heal for us to move forward.
Have y'all forgiven your husbands? What should I do to get my wife back. I miss her so much and I want to do things differently but she doesn't want to hear it
This made me feel more sane. I am having a hard time between triggers, thoughts, and intuition and separating the 3. I related with so much of this video
Thank you so much for creating a video that told it exactly how it is. I didn’t feel like you were talking at me but talking with me and having a conversation.
I hated a certain date of the month, i notice I would snap and have an attitude every time that date was approaching, it does take time to heal it took two years for my triggers to stop. I thank god that I’m heal and my marriage is heal.
I was married to a narcissist for 17 years and he slept with my identical twin. The only two people I was close to and trusted. I had children with him... I'm not sure if I'll ever recover. It affects all of my current relationships. I always wonder, is this person cheating or is it all in my head, because I dont trust anyone anymore. I no longer trust my own feelings and intuition anymore. It's tough. No matter how much time passes, some days it just hits me like it happened yesterday. They are both out of my life, but it's so hard to let go of it. I meditate on releasing it daily and most days I'm fine and then, out of the blue, it just hits me..God and Jesus and my children are the only relationships I have anymore. Any other relationships are too painful. I am so happy being alone...I just wish I could drink something that makes me completely forget what happened. I wish I never knew.
Lexie Mae I’m soo sorry that happen to you, but don’t let their behavior cause you to mis out, God has someone for you!!! That will love you unconditionally the way that God loves you, The Bible says husbands love your wife like I loved the church, your husband didn’t do that, and they will get their payback. I pray that you will continue to be strong, and get ready for your new chapter. 🙏🏾❤️
Firstly, I sincerely am sorry that this traumatic experience happened to you and your family as well. Secondly, I too am married to a narcissist and I struggle daily with my emotions regarding him, being in a marriage with him etc. Can't believe that I really am not the only one dealing with this type of pain and experience. So happy to hear that you are happy now. Stay blessed!
Thank you for this video. Danielle you are hitting it on the nail. Things are really the way you describe, your questions and comments are just so on point!
This was such a great video. I am truly in trouble. The crazy thing is. I’m also beyond my time. I say that because I’ve been writing. I write daily to every two days. I have made a list of triggers about a month ago. I have also wrote in my journal cursing people out. I have been doing that a lot this past year. I have not said some of the things to some of the people that has wronged me. My husband is the type of person like you have described before as far as being a peacekeeper. He will sweep everything under the rug then say taaaa daaaaa I’m here, I thought you said we were moving forward, so why do we keep talking about this. He say he understands the devastation it caused me, but that is to be determined. Because of the infidelity I have experienced some weight loss to where I’ve went 2-3 days without eating, I go to work then come home and go straight to bed at 6pm ( I’m grieving terribly the cycle start then finish’s then start back again) when I found out i instantly get diarrhea, anxiety and panic attack. I thank god I was never pregnant when I found these things out because I know I would have lost a child or two because the feeling in my body automatically causes me to release everything inside of me including urine. I’m just sick to my stomach to where I can function long enough to last the work day then come home ignore and neglect my children (all they want to do is talk to me but my mind becomes so preoccupied that I can’t even hear them when they speak to me) unconsciously just to get back up the next day
I totally agree with you...its an unbelievable experience..I feel your pain and it's your decision to choose to stay...I pray that God Grant's your heart peace...
This is Complex PTSD otherwise known as Betrayal Trauma. Most need professional help from a therapist who understands this. A good book is “Intimate Deception” by Dr Sheri Keffer. Her book can help
This is exactly on point! The crazy thing about my wife and my self is honestly I feel I don’t have the right to ask her over and over again about her infidelity because I myself had an affair 1st and not only that I did it. It happened 2 more times after her 1st time. I feel it’s unfair to her honestly but I can’t help how it feels to know why where and with who. I confessed and laid it all out I was ashamed and felt stupid but I felt it needed to be all out for my sanity. But for her I feel she is holding back and not being truthful. And this is what bothers me. It happened and I feel it did. But I feel unsettled because I feel I’m being lied to and this is what bothers me. But this talk opened my eyes.
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Thank you for this! This video is spot on in terms of how I've felt/been feeling. I have been suffering for months thinking and feeling ashamed/guilty that I'm having triggers and wondering if I'm over reacting. You guys have put words/explanation to what I'm feeling. I don't feel so bad as I feel that the way I feel is validated and I have the right to feel traumatized. Thank you again, you guys are awesome.
Every part of this video I needed! My husband sent me the video talking about the sufferer, the builder, and the adventure. I realized that for 3 years I've been the sufferer. This video talking about triggers is spot on! I have been feeling it all, down to the movie scenes! God knew I needed this video! I'm trying to move past the infidelity. We've created table talk where we talk about any and everything. Then we read our Word. God hates divorce, so I'm trying all I can. The triggers are the worse because i want to run full speed away from this all, but I love God and want to please Him. Pray for us.
It is indeed worst than death. I thank God for helping me keep my sanity. I would have ended up behind bars because of two counts of murder and as a result, two kids who are forced to grow up because of a broken family. And I had to live with this tsunami of negative emotions just to keep my family intact. I feel if I give up on the marriage, its my fault my kids will go astray.
Same. He left me in read and suddenly I remembered that he usually is texting other women when he is missing. I feel the same exact hurt, even though we were building.
Thank you for this, it's really opened my eyes to what I've gone through and what has happened for me and my partner. We both have some of these exact traits Fantastic video
Thank you Jesus for this video! And thank you both for giving me a better understanding. I've watched this video a few times and still getting milage out of it. It feels like you were talking about me!
I’ve needed this for the past 8 months. Thank you. That exactly how I felt and I feel that’s how he felt. I still ask the same questions over & over, I still feel hurt. I feel like he wants to rush me through this
I really needed to hear this. My wife and I are currently on a break due to an affair. And I've been going through alot of triggers. Now I have clarity on how to deal with them.. Thanks alot
This has been so very helpful. What about the affair being with someone you were around. I feel disrespected on top of the affair. I can't find closure. The female he had the affair with, I want to address her. I want us both to address her. She was a part of my circle for over three years. She took my son's graduation pictures. My husband just wants to move forward and keep asking for forgiveness. I pray and can't seems to forgive. I want to forgive, however, I want it to be genuine. At this point too much damage and not enough action on his part. He hasn't done anything forthcoming, everything has been like pulling teeth. I don't know who he is anymore. Where is the man I deeply love.
Whatever it is that will help you get the closure to move on, do it. If he truly wants you, he should be okay with that. He’s the one who betrayed your trust. If confronting her will give you the closure you need, make sure you do it. Do not leave ANY loose ends or you run the risk of it happening again.
I had a long term boyfriend who cheated once. I walked away. He came back sorry and wanting to start over. Problem was he kept the woman has a friend. Texting/talking and fb buddy. He thought it was wrong for me to ask him to give up that friend or at least distance himself from her. 😲
Lies and Infidelity is a very serious issue to deal with and it’s a major threat to most marriages and relationships.Scars left behind from a narcissist husband is hard to erase from the mind. I was reluctant at first about finding the truth about my cheating husband but I’m glad I finally took the courage for it .I got help from Cyber Hack Solutions as he helped clone my cheating husband’s phone and I got access to all his phone call logs, emails, text messages both deleted texts and also social media chats; whatsApp , Facebook, Instagram without having access to his phone because he is mostly out of town due to the nature of his work , all I provided was his phone number to this wonderful hacker. This was very revealing for me as he’s a serial cheater until I got into his phone and ended things.I’m glad to uncover his, lies, secrets and Infidelity. You can contact this amazing Hacker David via gmail (cyberhack003) or text and call on his phone and WhatsApp : +15303784744
This is a great video but many of the statements are worded from the assumption that it’s always the man who cheated or sometimes it’s both at different times. For men it’s about manning up but it can be even harder for us because when a woman cheats she didn’t just open her legs. She opened her heart to some degree - most of the time.
For me it’s the needing to know, to move forward. I expect clarity and honesty that way I can know if I can ever trust the person again, if I feel like the person isn’t being transparent about everything then it’s hard to keep moving forward
You didn't mention not being able to touch are show real caring and loving feelings because they so easily gave themselves to someone besides not coming clean.
I found this to be very good information especially in my situation as my wife cheated but we are openly talking as she is understanding my pain and answers all my questions. But at the same time I don’t want to beat the topic to death but you two have helped me find a ways to get more information into a consolidated way. We have been working on our issue for a week as I’m doing well with her infidelity I do get triggered and when I do I try not to jump on her about it I just try to let it pass and then ask her to explain any new questions I have. I can admit the talking and her openness to speak to me about it has help me in a big way. I will ask her to watch this video as well so she can understand my point of view. Thank you again
Watching this in my moments of triggers,dated this guy for five years,got married,then two months into the marriage i realize he has a one year old son 🥺
Infidelity has been literally, by far the most pain I've EVER been in... even years later after it's over. My triggers are not taken well. I try to be honest and state my triggers but then it jist causes more problems so I have to keep it to myself but it's very difficult. I don't think I will ever get over thus. I've simply learned how to manage it the best I can.
She cheated and I found out.. so much pain so we went apart. She hang out with him for a few months till she called me 4 months later that she wanted to try again and so we did... the hardest part is the biggest trigger. She still hangs out with him as 'friends'. Now that's a mega trigger. Believe me..
@@markhendriks9050 good for you. I'm sure it was hard. But if she wasn't willing to make some changes to make you more comfortable. Its probably for the best.
The infidelity issues I'm dealing with right now are so painful because I recently got married and I was already two months pregnant on my wedding day, I'm now 8 months pregnant and have been battling depression due to finding out that he's been sleeping with hookers this whole year, this after a squeecky clean couple of years of no infidelity at all... This has truly destroyed me as I'm currently completely dependent on him financially and cannot leave, I'm an emotional reck constantly and now have serious trust issues. The sadness I feel is tremendous as all this anxiety and depression couldn't have happened at a worse time cause it will somehow impact my unborn child 😭. He doesn't see it as a big deal because he says it's just call girls and not an actual affair... But feels terrible for how it's hurt me and how depressed I am while carrying his unborn child. I have literally no one to talk to about what I'm going through and dealing with. I'm so heart sore. 💔💔
You are in my prayers right now! I went through something similar when I was carrying my first child. But I was completely isolated, my car was taken away from me so that he could use it without even asking me. He would leave for a whole week and come back on the weekends because he was trying to do a sales job with his mother. So I pretty much spent my whole first pregnancy alone. It's an awful feeling and I cannot help but Cry For You! Going to the father and praying for you right now! God bless and keep the faith! When all else fails us, and everyone else fails us, and they will, our God is an awesome God and he will never fail us! Thank you Jesus!
Lies and Infidelity is a very serious issue to deal with and it’s a major threat to most marriages and relationships.Scars left behind from a narcissist husband is hard to erase from the mind. I was reluctant at first about finding the truth about my cheating husband but I’m glad I finally took the courage for it .I got help from Cyber Hack Solutions as he helped clone my cheating husband’s phone and I got access to all his phone call logs, emails, text messages both deleted texts and also social media chats; whatsApp , Facebook, Instagram without having access to his phone because he is mostly out of town due to the nature of his work , all I provided was his phone number to this wonderful hacker. This was very revealing for me as he’s a serial cheater until I got into his phone and ended things.I’m glad to uncover his, lies, secrets and Infidelity. You can contact this amazing Hacker David via gmail (cyberhack003) or text and call on his phone and WhatsApp : +15303784744
I agree this is hard I just recently found out my husband was cheating ansmd when asking mind you not, not accusing or yelling just asking I was screamed at and told I betrayed his trust by looking at his phone. I am working on forgiving him but it is def hard I know the biggest trigger I have is ticktock right now
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What about triggers for the unfaithful? Are they allowed during the rebuilding and healing process? I.e. pet or nicknames... they prefer their mate not use anymore because the assailant wanted to be called that
How does one really deal with triggers after infidelity?? There are so many... 🙄 When he's staring at another beautiful woman while you both in public - that's a trigger. Him viewing porn videos daily and fantasizing about doing things to others cause he's technically bored of sleeping with you after so many years, that's a trigger. Him commenting on how beautiful another woman is while watching something on TV, that's a trigger. Him leaving the house telling you he's on his way to work and that he'll be back late knowing full well that he's gonna slip in sometime in the day to screw around with someone else.... Trigger. There's just no winning. Him sneaking around while you're half asleep and deleting certain conversations on his phone with women saved under fictitious names.... It's alot. 🙄💔 Never had any issues with porn until I got cheated on and triggers started to follow me everywhere. There's still nothing wrong with porn to stimulate an old and tired relationship that needs help but when you dealing with a porn addict who just so happens to be your husband who's cheated then it's something else.
He should not be doing any of these things if you guys are trying to work it out. It doesn't sound like he is even sorry for his actions. I agree that you are probably going to need professional help,but I do understand how hard it is to get them to agree to that. We went one time within a week or 2 of Dday. I do think that I or we need to go back. But I think I went into it wanting someone else to fix it for me. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it and all this will be fixed. That simply just isn't the case. It takes lots of time, and both sides working very hard. If you dont have that, then it probably won't ever be better. Good luck to you.
Pornography easily and does turn into an addiction. It kills love. It kills real perceptions, real relationships. Porn is devastating and disgusting. It aids in human trafficking. Not one good thing comes from porn.
What do you do when your spouse see you as a trigger? How do you handle infidelity from both and one spouse minimize their action. What do you do when there’s awkwardness between the two during intimate times(Outings just the two, showers together, pillow talk, etc)?
Mine had an emotional affair with his coworker. She’s coming back in a few weeks to visit work. Everyone says she can, cause not just my husband worked there. He was drinking a lot. I hate alcohol and it triggers me. He says I don’t care about what he needs. He needs the alcohol to unwind from his day. He doesn’t drink a lot, but it freaks me out. Then he picked up smoking, and now I don’t trust him at all. Never distrusted him, any female. Even from his past triggers me now, when it didn’t then. Old female coworkers. I have so many. I feel like he’s lying, burner phone, sometimes leaves work to go to a job site, and I freak out he’s doing something. I hate it. It’s like torture. I never had these feelings before. All I want is for him to tell her to go away. When she moved and started texting him again. I kindly asked her to leave us alone. She said she would. She’s visited him twice now. Last year she followed him around for an hour.
I think trust in a relationship is overrated. When my husband started getting frequent night calls , i would ask and he would just wave off those calls as unimportant. At a time i could take no more of his lies, i decided i deserve to know what was going on. A friend of mine referred me to this great ethical hacking team( Cyberhackingsage@gmail ) who helped clone his cellphone without having to touch the device. My husband was a cheating Narcissist and I’m glad i found out all his secrets and infidelity and how he planned on using this pandemic to get back to me. I got access to his Facebook, iMessage, GPS location , WhatsApp, Call Logs and Text Messages (both deleted and incoming ones) with a remote link to a programmed App on my phone. I’m here in Florida and able to access my husband’s phone even while he was away in Canada cheating on me. Thanks to Cyberhackingsage, now i have enough evidence for my divorce. If you need help or that little bit of closure, i advice you get in touch with them Via Gmail ( cyberhackingsage@gmail )Or Text and WhatsApp them on +15713758467.............thank me later.
If he truly wants to move toward, why is he still answering her texts, why is he allowing her to come around. Has he had an actual conversation with her about leaving him alone or is just for show, and when you turn around he goes back to her. Honey it is not your JOB to make her go away. It is up to your HUSBAND to make her stay away forever. If he still answers her, he is entertaining her. Simple
Going back to the Hiroshima bomb; if going over & over & the questions is exhausting for the unfaithful, try to imagine what it’s like for the betrayed to try to reconstruct their city of Hiroshima! Your “bomb” has destroyed every belief, trust, reality, intuition, history with you, all the “special events”, favorite places, all their efforts in building a life with you, their concepts of what they thought they knew. Nothing will ever be the same for them again. Now, that the rose colored glasses have been blown off, their level of hyper vigilance is on every thing you say, do, don’t do, rationalize about, cop out on, every sigh, eye roll, excuse, pretense of innocence, every act of avoidance, inconsistency, missing bit of time and so on. You’re now under a microscope because they can’t trust you. And you think you’re exhausted? YOU HAVE ALL THE REALITY THAT THE BETRAYED WAS EXCLUDED FROM! You stole their life, their reality, their very ground from under their feet! You replaced them with a stranger and set them adrift at sea with no rudder, no compass, no shoreline! Nothing is recognizable. You stole all of their choices in secret! YOU HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS TO THEIR QUESTIONS! If you love your spouse at all & want to save or rebuild a relationship with them, don’t breadcrumb them with tidbits of information! You owe them everything to help them heal! If you can show compassion & true remorse, tell them everything they need to know! Anything less is just more lying, deception, secrecy, cruelty & manipulation!
My now husband, cheated on me multiple times with the same woman when we were dating in a long distance relationship. 3years into our marriage, and I’m just now finding out. It was five years ago but I feel deceived and hurt. Thoughts on how to deal or move forward...
For me I chose to not attach the act of it to the current state of where we are at...I still glance yet, even when I feel what ifs I remind myself that a forgiving mistake don't need to keep attaching and to not allow it to control or trigger you
Thanks for these videos. They have been very helpful. I am the betrayer (had an affair with his best friend before my partner and I started dating and didn't tell him until 2 yrs into our relationship). My partner decided to go through with the relationship and we got married almost a year now. It's been 3 yrs since Dday, we've made significant progress but he still has troubles with triggers, his masculinity and how his friends will see him. How can we deal with this? Please help!!!
On one hand you have drama and baggage that gets triggered and causes irrational reaction based in fear... but there's also wisdom and intuition that warns you when a pattern of behavior is detected that needs to be addressed. Not every red flag is a false flag.
How does talking about it constantly with 3rd parties help you heal? I find that for me I’m able to get over triggers if I “open it up for discussion” with people in my life that aren’t in our lives. People in our lives will judge him but people that are distance from him won’t judge. I also throw away anything in the house that could trigger the rage eg shirts that remind me of a day etc 😏 #OwnCopingMechanisms
Cheating is not a mistake it is simply a decision!
Just wonderful, I been tryin to find out about "how to repair relationship after cheating" for a while now, and I think this has helped. Ever heard of - Qenamilla Strayer Magnet - (just google it ) ? Ive heard some awesome things about it and my co-worker got excellent results with it.
This was great, thanks, I been tryin to find out ) ? Ive heard some amazing things about it and my m8 got great success with it.
You're sure right👍
Exactly
Okay, totally agreed
Man i literally cried the entire time watching this. Thank you I needed to hear this to know I wasn’t going crazy. I get these triggers and can’t breath, I get angry, I cry, I get anxiety attacks and I feel helpless.
If you are feeling your partner might be cheating on you, but there's no definite evidence. You're faced with two alternatives seek out the facts, or to turn a blind eye. Selecting the first choice, although often suitable in the short term, is incredibly damaging for your personally, But for your children and family, not only in the long run too. Seeking the truth out isn't simple either as I mentioned before, technology had made infidelity much easier to conceal than in the past, however it also provides opportunities for revealing getting the evidence needed to establish them & affairs. I hate cheaters, my husband never gave me a reason to be suspicious until I found him and her colleague at a romantic restaurant. They told me it was work stuff but something wasn't right. I was worried until I was introduced to ultimate hack who offer Remote Installation to the his device, They build a web Dashboard for monitoring, 24x7 monitoring (Live GPS), They also gave me full access into the Social apps (Facebook, Instagram, Whatsapp, etc. There service is 100 % Anonymous, SHA-256 Encrypted Data, They also recover all Deleted Messages and Data you can contact via gmail ultimatehack003@gmail,com or whatsapp +17202954268 wishing you the best.
@@alysonlentini1615 We actually were on the verge of divorce because of us both cheating. now we have reconciled but we are both dealing with our triggers and learning how to trust again. We are happy we are back together and have been taking the time to communicate our feelings more and even have date night once a week but it is still hard. thanks for responding.
yeah this has been a journey and the recovery is difficult 😞
Same here, Tiffany! It hurts still but it feels better to know I don’t have these issues alone. Prayers for us all.🙏🏽
I got to know that my spouse is having an affair through a message on his phone about two weeks ago after being in a relationship for 11 years. He want me to forgive him and remain in the relationship but has now changed the password on his phone. That doesn't make any sense. I am an emotional wreak. I want to make things work but seeing him makes me angry
I was once a victim of heart break. My husband was cheating on me for about 2 years in our marriage. When I became suspicious, he always says that I am looking for excuses since I haven't caught him. But there was allot of red flags and so I talked to a friend. who advised me and connected to some professional. Who helped me uncover everything with proofs, so he can't deny it. I was so devastated when I found out but I am glad I did. Because I was getting so troubled at heart. But after this, I found a way to gain back my inner peace. Sometimes it is better to know than to just keep being troubled at heart. I am happy that I did take those steps.
so how did you get to find out?
I employed the help of a professional, who helped me to uncover everything with evidence. Here is his contact no. below
1[559]
[3760]
[021]
I’ve never felt more validated in my feelings. Not with my friends, partner, anyone. I finally have clarity on my thoughts and know some steps to take. I never ever thought I’d heal but this gave me hope again. Thank you so much for this.
Yes this is real and is worse when ur husband thinks he is doing everything right and just wants u to move on. And specially gets bothered when u bring it up or get sad
It's been 8 months and I'm triggered daily. I sent him this video. I hope he finally understands where I'm coming from.
Infidelity destroys souls. Why would anyone do that to someone else? It changes them forever
I bet smh i will never trust never been cheated on that i know of .However not looking to be trusted as well if thats case. Not being in relationship and being selfish on your purpose best way
When the marriage came to this earth it comes with infidelity together
Because were human and make mistakes. Are you God? No. Noone is safe from sins like these
unfortunately im going through something similar :( its soul crushing
@@PrincessYadii so how many mistakes should be alllowed?
13 years later and I am still drowning in hurt. Yet, I am still supposed to just "move on" because they haven't done it since.
17
This video really put voice to my experience and pain unlike any other video I've watched so far. Thank you.
This is just superb, I've been looking for "does marriage counseling work after an affair" for a while now, and I think this has helped. Have you ever come across - Qenamilla Strayer Magnet - (do a google search ) ? Ive heard some unbelievable things about it and my partner got cool success with it.
This was great, thanks, I have been researching "how to move forward in a relationship after being cheated on" for a while now, and I think this has helped. You ever tried - Qenamilla Strayer Magnet - (Have a quick look on google cant remember the place now ) ? Ive heard some unbelievable things about it and my brother in law got excellent success with it.
hey ,if anyone else needs to find out about how do i talk to my husband about infidelity? try Mahorrla Melt Feelings Method (do a search on google )?
It is a good one off guide for learning how to win your ex back minus the normal expense. Ive heard some awesome things about it and my neighbor got great success with it.
This is exactly how I feel. Not all the time but yes... The visual was very powerful.
I hate all the excuses cheaters have. What about the neglect they do to there wives ? You didn’t slip on a banana peel and fall into some ones bed 😡 it’s a choice. My husband thinks I should just be able to get over his 2 year affair like a light switch. 😡
I needed this, I have watched this so many times it's not even funny. To have someone on this earth that understands how hard it can be is just reassuring. I don't think my wife will ever understand the hurt and pain one goes through with just one act of infidelity let along multiple. You guys are great and I appreciate the time you took to make this video for "ME"!!
This was a blessing on so many levels but here is a point of view not covered. How about the feeling of the one who committed the offense...the brokenness, guilt, shame, the prison depression, conviction was unbarible..I had insomnia, isolation, irritability, my family said I would be in my room for days coming out just to eat and bathe...When the bible says your a slave to it you are! Through Gods grace and alot of tears and repentance we are still together..We both come from broken homes and see the devastation of divorce so that was not a option with our daughter. As a man who nevsr wants to hurt the ones I love the most, it's important to talk about our struggles along with the ones we hurt. Its a every day battle!! Flee sexual Sin! Don't dab, play, think, entertain, watch, it will destroy you and everyone you❤
That's me. I miss my wife so much all I can do is cry
What took years to build demolished in seconds!!!
@Leslie Smith it’s not a cliché but you will get pass the rage anger hurt and betrayal... Holy Spirit brought to my remembrance scripture to meditate on everyday.. which has helped me when triggered.. yes it’s horrible. You will heal it does take time though don’t put yourself under any pressure to put what ever it is behind quickly... allow healing and all questions to be brought to the for front .. most of all Pray!!! & ask for strength and wisdom. 🙏🏾🙏🏾 .. A song has help me tremendously by Casting Crowns titled “ broken together “. May Gods peace rest upon you!!
@Clarissa Stewart well stated I agree with you.
@Clarissa Stewart wow, amazing take on this situation
That’s what bombs do! I’m still going through it. I’m looking at my Hiroshima ruins. You’re not alone.
Totally!
Husbands go through this as well not just the sisters.
amen to that
@@TurboGreen my husband has a lot of triggers as the unfaithful spouse and i dont know how to help him move past these events and what he did
@@katelyneortiz6602 I would be the wrong person as it turns out, mines a serial cheater, so I'm filling for divorce. 11 years of cheating is not acceptable. I'm sorry I couldn't be of much help
Amen!!!
also if it happens once and they are upfront about it, that's forgivable, repeat offences are not. we owe them NOTHING!
This is so on point - grateful to have come across this . Even harder when infidelity leads to a child
💔
❤
I've been battling PTSD anger and resentment for five years now... this video really helped me. Thank you
5 years!? That makes me so sad. Today is my 1 year anniversary from Dday. I can't imagine feeling this for 4 more years. Bless your heart. Hugs!
Almost 3 years for me. My D Day was on our family vacation.
There's no time line. Several years in, way more than five and I still feel like this several days a week.
I will add we've been in couples therapy and I've been in personal counseling ever since, all these years. And these things still happen so frequently.
Thank You! This Coming From A Woman Gives Me Reassurance That What I've Been Doing Is On The Right Track To Saving My Relationship!
Very happy to see a man that actually wants to
I salute you bro so am I
God knows I wish he would watch this so that he could understand.....
Replace the “she” with a “he” and you’ve spoken directly to my experience
Tho I am in a premarital relationship 2 years long, I have found this video very helpful. I’m the unfaithful here and now I perhaps have a deeper understanding when my gf is going through her day. I’m very fortunate that she’s willing to give it a chance and so this video right here is giving me a better idea on how to make sure she heals in the process. I will now worry about saying specific names, areas, and also avoid certain areas when I’m out
We are glad to hear the video was helpful! We assist couples through all walks of life. Please be sure to like, share, and subscribe!
This is the best information about how a betrayed person feels and how the betrayed can deal. I just wish my spouse would watch. Its more important for the person who betrayed to see this and well...let's face it.... they just want to move on. Love what you guys are doing here. Thank u Thank u!
This video right here is literally me all over. As much as I love my husband his serial cheating has affected me deeply where the smallest thing sets me off in feeling stressed, heartbroken plus more. I dont think my husband understands what he's done regardless of me trying to find a way to heal for us to move forward.
🥺😭 same
Same here with mine too …it’s like nothing to him 🙄
Probably tired of y'all whining about it. Forgiven doesn't mean bring it up every 2 seconds. Be thankful God actually forgives us and means it!!
Have y'all forgiven your husbands? What should I do to get my wife back. I miss her so much and I want to do things differently but she doesn't want to hear it
This made me feel more sane. I am having a hard time between triggers, thoughts, and intuition and separating the 3. I related with so much of this video
Thank you for this video. This is a great part of my healing journey
Thank you so much for creating a video that told it exactly how it is. I didn’t feel like you were talking at me but talking with me and having a conversation.
I hated a certain date of the month, i notice I would snap and have an attitude every time that date was approaching, it does take time to heal it took two years for my triggers to stop. I thank god that I’m heal and my marriage is heal.
Same
GREAT VIDEO . Wasn’t until I ran across this video that I actually saw someone else relate to how I actually feel.
I was married to a narcissist for 17 years and he slept with my identical twin. The only two people I was close to and trusted. I had children with him... I'm not sure if I'll ever recover. It affects all of my current relationships. I always wonder, is this person cheating or is it all in my head, because I dont trust anyone anymore. I no longer trust my own feelings and intuition anymore. It's tough. No matter how much time passes, some days it just hits me like it happened yesterday. They are both out of my life, but it's so hard to let go of it. I meditate on releasing it daily and most days I'm fine and then, out of the blue, it just hits me..God and Jesus and my children are the only relationships I have anymore. Any other relationships are too painful. I am so happy being alone...I just wish I could drink something that makes me completely forget what happened. I wish I never knew.
Lexie Mae I’m soo sorry that happen to you, but don’t let their behavior cause you to mis out, God has someone for you!!! That will love you unconditionally the way that God loves you, The Bible says husbands love your wife like I loved the church, your husband didn’t do that, and they will get their payback. I pray that you will continue to be strong, and get ready for your new chapter. 🙏🏾❤️
I understand
Firstly, I sincerely am sorry that this traumatic experience happened to you and your family as well. Secondly, I too am married to a narcissist and I struggle daily with my emotions regarding him, being in a marriage with him etc. Can't believe that I really am not the only one dealing with this type of pain and experience. So happy to hear that you are happy now. Stay blessed!
@@gwene.9912 payback?
T'Charles hi, do you have a question for me?
Thank you for this video. Danielle you are hitting it on the nail. Things are really the way you describe, your questions and comments are just so on point!
This was such a great video. I am truly in trouble. The crazy thing is. I’m also beyond my time. I say that because I’ve been writing. I write daily to every two days. I have made a list of triggers about a month ago. I have also wrote in my journal cursing people out. I have been doing that a lot this past year. I have not said some of the things to some of the people that has wronged me. My husband is the type of person like you have described before as far as being a peacekeeper. He will sweep everything under the rug then say taaaa daaaaa I’m here, I thought you said we were moving forward, so why do we keep talking about this. He say he understands the devastation it caused me, but that is to be determined. Because of the infidelity I have experienced some weight loss to where I’ve went 2-3 days without eating, I go to work then come home and go straight to bed at 6pm ( I’m grieving terribly the cycle start then finish’s then start back again) when I found out i instantly get diarrhea, anxiety and panic attack. I thank god I was never pregnant when I found these things out because I know I would have lost a child or two because the feeling in my body automatically causes me to release everything inside of me including urine.
I’m just sick to my stomach to where I can function long enough to last the work day then come home ignore and neglect my children (all they want to do is talk to me but my mind becomes so preoccupied that I can’t even hear them when they speak to me) unconsciously just to get back up the next day
I totally agree with you...its an unbelievable experience..I feel your pain and it's your decision to choose to stay...I pray that God Grant's your heart peace...
I'm so sorry you have to go through this.
This is Complex PTSD otherwise known as Betrayal Trauma. Most need professional help from a therapist who understands this. A good book is “Intimate Deception” by Dr Sheri Keffer. Her book can help
CherriLove Check the post above for a book I suggested
I am going through the exact same symptoms?
This is exactly on point! The crazy thing about my wife and my self is honestly I feel I don’t have the right to ask her over and over again about her infidelity because I myself had an affair 1st and not only that I did it. It happened 2 more times after her 1st time. I feel it’s unfair to her honestly but I can’t help how it feels to know why where and with who. I confessed and laid it all out I was ashamed and felt stupid but I felt it needed to be all out for my sanity. But for her I feel she is holding back and not being truthful. And this is what bothers me. It happened and I feel it did. But I feel unsettled because I feel I’m being lied to and this is what bothers me. But this talk opened my eyes.
I am so sorry that you are going through a difficult time. We would love to help you get through this and find a resolution. Please schedule a Discovery Call so that we can serve you: couplesacademy.intakeq.com/booking
This was very powerful knowledge.. and help... I feel very identify with this message... I have been having troubles with alot of the topics...
This is good and real!!! I wish he could understand this.. it’s hard at times
Same, I actually forward this video to my boyfriend. Stay strong and start writing in that journal.. I know I need to start too😔
Thank you for this! This video is spot on in terms of how I've felt/been feeling. I have been suffering for months thinking and feeling ashamed/guilty that I'm having triggers and wondering if I'm over reacting. You guys have put words/explanation to what I'm feeling.
I don't feel so bad as I feel that the way I feel is validated and I have the right to feel traumatized.
Thank you again, you guys are awesome.
Thank you for taking the time to encourage and support us. You are making a difference in our lives. .
This video is spot on, shout out to you guys
Felicia Ramirez thank you Felicia
Every part of this video I needed! My husband sent me the video talking about the sufferer, the builder, and the adventure. I realized that for 3 years I've been the sufferer. This video talking about triggers is spot on! I have been feeling it all, down to the movie scenes! God knew I needed this video! I'm trying to move past the infidelity. We've created table talk where we talk about any and everything. Then we read our Word. God hates divorce, so I'm trying all I can. The triggers are the worse because i want to run full speed away from this all, but I love God and want to please Him. Pray for us.
God hates cheating too. I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through love 🤍🤍🤍
This is by far the best delivery of the reality, speaking and explaining each partners experience within infidelity.
Thank you so much for this video 🖤
Great Info that I relate to💚
It is indeed worst than death. I thank God for helping me keep my sanity. I would have ended up behind bars because of two counts of murder and as a result, two kids who are forced to grow up because of a broken family. And I had to live with this tsunami of negative emotions just to keep my family intact. I feel if I give up on the marriage, its my fault my kids will go astray.
Thank you for the video ❤ in my journey of recovering and forgiving😊
Omg I needed this 9 months ago! 😭
Same. He left me in read and suddenly I remembered that he usually is texting other women when he is missing. I feel the same exact hurt, even though we were building.
Emotional triggers can be very hard to get through. Please schedule a Discovery Call so that we can serve you: couplesacademy.intakeq.com/booking
You two are very good. Your knowledge and understanding on the subject matter is bar none. Thank you!
This is spot on with everything I’m dealing with
You hit the jackpot, sir. Your wife is stunning.
Powerful!!! Thank you.
This video is incredible! You guys have no idea how important of a service you are providing. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Just subscribe! Thankyou my husband recently had an emotional affair and I'm really in a painful space. I love your great advice.
Thank you for this, it's really opened my eyes to what I've gone through and what has happened for me and my partner. We both have some of these exact traits
Fantastic video
Thank you Jesus for this video! And thank you both for giving me a better understanding. I've watched this video a few times and still getting milage out of it. It feels like you were talking about me!
I’ve needed this for the past 8 months. Thank you. That exactly how I felt and I feel that’s how he felt. I still ask the same questions over & over, I still feel hurt. I feel like he wants to rush me through this
My feelings exactly
I really needed to hear this. My wife and I are currently on a break due to an affair. And I've been going through alot of triggers. Now I have clarity on how to deal with them..
Thanks alot
This has been so very helpful. What about the affair being with someone you were around. I feel disrespected on top of the affair. I can't find closure. The female he had the affair with, I want to address her. I want us both to address her. She was a part of my circle for over three years. She took my son's graduation pictures. My husband just wants to move forward and keep asking for forgiveness. I pray and can't seems to forgive. I want to forgive, however, I want it to be genuine. At this point too much damage and not enough action on his part. He hasn't done anything forthcoming, everything has been like pulling teeth. I don't know who he is anymore. Where is the man I deeply love.
Whatever it is that will help you get the closure to move on, do it. If he truly wants you, he should be okay with that. He’s the one who betrayed your trust. If confronting her will give you the closure you need, make sure you do it. Do not leave ANY loose ends or you run the risk of it happening again.
I had a long term boyfriend who cheated once. I walked away. He came back sorry and wanting to start over. Problem was he kept the woman has a friend. Texting/talking and fb buddy. He thought it was wrong for me to ask him to give up that friend or at least distance himself from her. 😲
How stupid can he be?
Lies and Infidelity is a very serious issue to deal with and it’s a major threat to most marriages and relationships.Scars left behind from a narcissist husband is hard to erase from the mind. I was reluctant at first about finding the truth about my cheating husband but I’m glad I finally took the courage for it .I got help from Cyber Hack Solutions as he helped clone my cheating husband’s phone and I got access to all his phone call logs, emails, text messages both deleted texts and also social media chats; whatsApp , Facebook, Instagram without having access to his phone because he is mostly out of town due to the nature of his work , all I provided was his phone number to this wonderful hacker. This was very revealing for me as he’s a serial cheater until I got into his phone and ended things.I’m glad to uncover his, lies, secrets and Infidelity. You can contact this amazing Hacker David via gmail (cyberhack003) or text and call on his phone and WhatsApp : +15303784744
Some people Re so infuriatingly ignorant
That's a soul tie , a friendship soul tie is stronger then an sexual one. Emotional cheating is more dangerous then physical.
Love Hasani’s visual imagery!
It’s best to move on rather stay. The individual usually never fully respect you again. You have to let the feelings happen and they will fade
This is a great video but many of the statements are worded from the assumption that it’s always the man who cheated or sometimes it’s both at different times. For men it’s about manning up but it can be even harder for us because when a woman cheats she didn’t just open her legs. She opened her heart to some degree - most of the time.
For me it’s the needing to know, to move forward. I expect clarity and honesty that way I can know if I can ever trust the person again, if I feel like the person isn’t being transparent about everything then it’s hard to keep moving forward
Thank you for this video I hope you have the best life possible you guys deserve it
You didn't mention not being able to touch are show real caring and loving feelings because they so easily gave themselves to someone besides not coming clean.
You get it!
I found this to be very good information especially in my situation as my wife cheated but we are openly talking as she is understanding my pain and answers all my questions. But at the same time I don’t want to beat the topic to death but you two have helped me find a ways to get more information into a consolidated way. We have been working on our issue for a week as I’m doing well with her infidelity I do get triggered and when I do I try not to jump on her about it I just try to let it pass and then ask her to explain any new questions I have. I can admit the talking and her openness to speak to me about it has help me in a big way. I will ask her to watch this video as well so she can understand my point of view. Thank you again
How are you two doing now ?
This did help me a lot
Watching this in my moments of triggers,dated this guy for five years,got married,then two months into the marriage i realize he has a one year old son 🥺
Hard work who needs this in one’s life especially as you get older
Thanks for this video, very helpful
Thanks 👍🏽 appreciate it
We are happy to help and provide support. Please schedule a Discovery Call today so that we may assist: couplesacademy.intakeq.com/booking
This was very good because it was me
Great information I like how the guy kept saying unfaithful partner because it could be man or woman !!!
Great teachings. Thank you for your Ministry.
Great advice!
What if the trigger is what he says caused him to cheat.
Infidelity has been literally, by far the most pain I've EVER been in... even years later after it's over. My triggers are not taken well. I try to be honest and state my triggers but then it jist causes more problems so I have to keep it to myself but it's very difficult. I don't think I will ever get over thus. I've simply learned how to manage it the best I can.
Great session.
I feel like if I have to through all of this anxiety and triggers....it's time to leave! Sorry...i just can't 🤨
She cheated and I found out.. so much pain so we went apart. She hang out with him for a few months till she called me 4 months later that she wanted to try again and so we did... the hardest part is the biggest trigger. She still hangs out with him as 'friends'. Now that's a mega trigger. Believe me..
Absolutely not
She should never communicate with him again. That is just asking for trouble.
@@jennifergarrison4354 I decided to split up.. couldn't live with the feeling anymore
@@markhendriks9050 good for you. I'm sure it was hard. But if she wasn't willing to make some changes to make you more comfortable. Its probably for the best.
@@jennifergarrison4354 thanks for your reply.. yes you are totally right
The infidelity issues I'm dealing with right now are so painful because I recently got married and I was already two months pregnant on my wedding day, I'm now 8 months pregnant and have been battling depression due to finding out that he's been sleeping with hookers this whole year, this after a squeecky clean couple of years of no infidelity at all...
This has truly destroyed me as I'm currently completely dependent on him financially and cannot leave, I'm an emotional reck constantly and now have serious trust issues. The sadness I feel is tremendous as all this anxiety and depression couldn't have happened at a worse time cause it will somehow impact my unborn child 😭. He doesn't see it as a big deal because he says it's just call girls and not an actual affair... But feels terrible for how it's hurt me and how depressed I am while carrying his unborn child. I have literally no one to talk to about what I'm going through and dealing with. I'm so heart sore. 💔💔
Please contact me would like to talk to you. Going through the same here maybe we can share/vent with each other.
I am dealing with the same issue also and i am alone in this contact me also if you want to vent❤️
khanyo I am going through Depression too after I found out my husband cheated it broke me
You are in my prayers right now! I went through something similar when I was carrying my first child. But I was completely isolated, my car was taken away from me so that he could use it without even asking me. He would leave for a whole week and come back on the weekends because he was trying to do a sales job with his mother. So I pretty much spent my whole first pregnancy alone. It's an awful feeling and I cannot help but Cry For You! Going to the father and praying for you right now! God bless and keep the faith! When all else fails us, and everyone else fails us, and they will, our God is an awesome God and he will never fail us! Thank you Jesus!
Lies and Infidelity is a very serious issue to deal with and it’s a major threat to most marriages and relationships.Scars left behind from a narcissist husband is hard to erase from the mind. I was reluctant at first about finding the truth about my cheating husband but I’m glad I finally took the courage for it .I got help from Cyber Hack Solutions as he helped clone my cheating husband’s phone and I got access to all his phone call logs, emails, text messages both deleted texts and also social media chats; whatsApp , Facebook, Instagram without having access to his phone because he is mostly out of town due to the nature of his work , all I provided was his phone number to this wonderful hacker. This was very revealing for me as he’s a serial cheater until I got into his phone and ended things.I’m glad to uncover his, lies, secrets and Infidelity. You can contact this amazing Hacker David via gmail (cyberhack003) or text and call on his phone and WhatsApp : +15303784744
Amazing video
Very insightful
I agree this is hard I just recently found out my husband was cheating ansmd when asking mind you not, not accusing or yelling just asking I was screamed at and told I betrayed his trust by looking at his phone.
I am working on forgiving him but it is def hard I know the biggest trigger I have is ticktock right now
I miss my wife so much. Sometimes I get to upset with myself i want to die. My wife is everything to me and i kept playing and now she leaving
I’ve been fighting triggers & lose complete control of how I feel towards my partner. It’s been 6 years & I feel trapped in my head
Reach out on Insta @cyberrov_hackers or Text him (929) 352-3648. he is a IT personal, hacker, programmer and software scientist.reach out for iCloud, social media recovery/hack,spying on your spouses mobile phone and social media bypass. he is very reliable . Trust me
What do you do when the affair was with a coworker and they still work together?? Help.
What about triggers for the unfaithful? Are they allowed during the rebuilding and healing process? I.e. pet or nicknames... they prefer their mate not use anymore because the assailant wanted to be called that
How does one really deal with triggers after infidelity?? There are so many... 🙄
When he's staring at another beautiful woman while you both in public - that's a trigger. Him viewing porn videos daily and fantasizing about doing things to others cause he's technically bored of sleeping with you after so many years, that's a trigger. Him commenting on how beautiful another woman is while watching something on TV, that's a trigger.
Him leaving the house telling you he's on his way to work and that he'll be back late knowing full well that he's gonna slip in sometime in the day to screw around with someone else.... Trigger. There's just no winning. Him sneaking around while you're half asleep and deleting certain conversations on his phone with women saved under fictitious names.... It's alot. 🙄💔 Never had any issues with porn until I got cheated on and triggers started to follow me everywhere. There's still nothing wrong with porn to stimulate an old and tired relationship that needs help but when you dealing with a porn addict who just so happens to be your husband who's cheated then it's something else.
There is something terribly wrong with porn. I don’t know how old this post is, but you guys need to get into counseling asap.
@@risingstarbaptistchurchyou1275 thank you for the advise, we definitely need counseling.
He should not be doing any of these things if you guys are trying to work it out. It doesn't sound like he is even sorry for his actions. I agree that you are probably going to need professional help,but I do understand how hard it is to get them to agree to that. We went one time within a week or 2 of Dday. I do think that I or we need to go back. But I think I went into it wanting someone else to fix it for me. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it and all this will be fixed. That simply just isn't the case. It takes lots of time, and both sides working very hard. If you dont have that, then it probably won't ever be better. Good luck to you.
You nailed it. High ten took the words right out of me
Pornography easily and does turn into an addiction. It kills love. It kills real perceptions, real relationships. Porn is devastating and disgusting. It aids in human trafficking. Not one good thing comes from porn.
What do you do when your spouse see you as a trigger? How do you handle infidelity from both and one spouse minimize their action. What do you do when there’s awkwardness between the two during intimate times(Outings just the two, showers together, pillow talk, etc)?
Mine had an emotional affair with his coworker. She’s coming back in a few weeks to visit work. Everyone says she can, cause not just my husband worked there. He was drinking a lot. I hate alcohol and it triggers me. He says I don’t care about what he needs. He needs the alcohol to unwind from his day. He doesn’t drink a lot, but it freaks me out. Then he picked up smoking, and now I don’t trust him at all. Never distrusted him, any female. Even from his past triggers me now, when it didn’t then. Old female coworkers. I have so many. I feel like he’s lying, burner phone, sometimes leaves work to go to a job site, and I freak out he’s doing something. I hate it. It’s like torture. I never had these feelings before. All I want is for him to tell her to go away. When she moved and started texting him again. I kindly asked her to leave us alone. She said she would. She’s visited him twice now. Last year she followed him around for an hour.
I think trust in a relationship is overrated. When my husband started getting frequent night calls , i would ask and he would just wave off those calls as unimportant. At a time i could take no more of his lies, i decided i deserve to know what was going on. A friend of mine referred me to this great ethical hacking team( Cyberhackingsage@gmail ) who helped clone his cellphone without having to touch the device. My husband was a cheating Narcissist and I’m glad i found out all his secrets and infidelity and how he planned on using this pandemic to get back to me. I got access to his Facebook, iMessage, GPS location , WhatsApp, Call Logs and Text Messages (both deleted and incoming ones) with a remote link to a programmed App on my phone. I’m here in Florida and able to access my husband’s phone even while he was away in Canada cheating on me. Thanks to Cyberhackingsage, now i have enough evidence for my divorce. If you need help or that little bit of closure, i advice you get in touch with them Via Gmail ( cyberhackingsage@gmail )Or Text and WhatsApp them on +15713758467.............thank me later.
If he truly wants to move toward, why is he still answering her texts, why is he allowing her to come around. Has he had an actual conversation with her about leaving him alone or is just for show, and when you turn around he goes back to her. Honey it is not your JOB to make her go away. It is up to your HUSBAND to make her stay away forever. If he still answers her, he is entertaining her. Simple
Going back to the Hiroshima bomb; if going over & over & the questions is exhausting for the unfaithful, try to imagine what it’s like for the betrayed to try to reconstruct their city of Hiroshima! Your “bomb” has destroyed every belief, trust, reality, intuition, history with you, all the “special events”, favorite places, all their efforts in building a life with you, their concepts of what they thought they knew. Nothing will ever be the same for them again.
Now, that the rose colored glasses have been blown off, their level of hyper vigilance is on every thing you say, do, don’t do, rationalize about, cop out on, every sigh, eye roll, excuse, pretense of innocence, every act of avoidance, inconsistency, missing bit of time and so on. You’re now under a microscope because they can’t trust you. And you think you’re exhausted? YOU HAVE ALL THE REALITY THAT THE BETRAYED WAS EXCLUDED FROM! You stole their life, their reality, their very ground from under their feet! You replaced them with a stranger and set them adrift at sea with no rudder, no compass, no shoreline! Nothing is recognizable. You stole all of their choices in secret! YOU HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS TO THEIR QUESTIONS! If you love your spouse at all & want to save or rebuild a relationship with them, don’t breadcrumb them with tidbits of information! You owe them everything to help them heal! If you can show compassion & true remorse, tell them everything they need to know! Anything less is just more lying, deception, secrecy, cruelty & manipulation!
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My now husband, cheated on me multiple times with the same woman when we were dating in a long distance relationship. 3years into our marriage, and I’m just now finding out. It was five years ago but I feel deceived and hurt. Thoughts on how to deal or move forward...
Can you please tell me why you only keep referring to the “hurt wives”?! I’m a guy & been cheated on!! Smh.
mcdeepend
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How do you deal with or avoid triggers when it’s his phone or Facebook?
Athena Crotinger this is my issue.. every time his phone rings, vibrate, dings, or make a noise I get anxiety
Me too 😢
For me I chose to not attach the act of it to the current state of where we are at...I still glance yet, even when I feel what ifs I remind myself that a forgiving mistake don't need to keep attaching and to not allow it to control or trigger you
Sam, that’s how I felt with my ex. Or when he would leave “to work”
😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔 arg man!!!
I really found this extremely insightful and put a voice to how I feel.
Thanks for these videos. They have been very helpful.
I am the betrayer (had an affair with his best friend before my partner and I started dating and didn't tell him until 2 yrs into our relationship). My partner decided to go through with the relationship and we got married almost a year now. It's been 3 yrs since Dday, we've made significant progress but he still has troubles with triggers, his masculinity and how his friends will see him. How can we deal with this? Please help!!!
On one hand you have drama and baggage that gets triggered and causes irrational reaction based in fear... but there's also wisdom and intuition that warns you when a pattern of behavior is detected that needs to be addressed. Not every red flag is a false flag.
I'm triggered by this video
Thank you for this ❤
How does talking about it constantly with 3rd parties help you heal? I find that for me I’m able to get over triggers if I “open it up for discussion” with people in my life that aren’t in our lives. People in our lives will judge him but people that are distance from him won’t judge.
I also throw away anything in the house that could trigger the rage eg shirts that remind me of a day etc 😏
#OwnCopingMechanisms
It's not just women that's being betrade!!!!!!
She married perfection. I wish my husband was like him.
That’s your problem now
@@901trukkdriverremy2 what problem?