The Final Boss of Bad Chinese Blockbusters | Video Essay
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- Опубліковано 5 чер 2024
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Accented Cinema - Episode 115
This movie has nothing to do with the Nintendo product of the same name.
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Update: Demonitized because Lin Chi-ling is too hot to handle.
Worth it.
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I love Yui Hatano in Yakuza Kiwami.
truly a cultured individual
was this a dare...
she's my fav also lol
yes, i'll stick to your recommendation
shame on you hhhhhhhh now I have to check it out.
The problem with this review is that the opening shot of those girls on roller blades dressed in silver exploding still makes me want to see the movie.
Don't let your heart(or crotch) win.
It's not worth it.
@@sinisterpanda2738men ☕
😂😂😂😂@@sinisterpanda2738
Can we edit it down to just the good stuff & make a cool music video? Is there 3 minutes of good in that film?
Tbf, that scene look stupidly interesting, people would watch for stupid fun
"In a race your supposed to cross the finish line and not to chase after other people" is a lesson a lot of movie studios need to learn
Yup, that's what Warner Bros. did with the DC franchise, it was doing quite well as its own thing until they decided to chase after Marvel and be another MCU.
@@nightvisiongogglesIn general? Most people wouldn’t want to see something that are dime a dozen; they want to see something *different*. Sure, they will have some recognizable elements because everything is a remix to a degree, but it will be *your* remix and nobody else’s.
Also to applies to most business. You can't win first place by following your competitors.
@@vikareus1257 Except the huge success of Disney's live action remakes destroys that theory. Hollywood follows the money.
@@nightvisiongoggles To be fair, I don't think WB wanted a race in the first place. They just wanted to capitalize on the trend.
here we go again, accented cinema torture himself for our own entertainment
bing chilling
love seeing orbits here 😸
“Ha ha you all thought I was the kid’s mom, but I was actually the kid’s dad!”
"You're supposed to race towards the finish line, not chase other people". Give me a minute, Zhang just blew my mind a little bit
Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyup. Stellar line.
"Desperately trying to prove to the world that you are a winner, not a weiner."
fire line
The image of the wife calmly asking if her husband is only with her bc of their son, while dangling from a helicopter which kidnapped her using suction cups on the top of her car like an arcade claw game, is so stupid and unintentionally hilarious
edit: actually they might be magnets, but still...he shouldn't even be able to hear her with the helicopter going lol
Ahahhahah fair point
🤣🤣🤣🤣
Sure he can. She has her phone on speaker, that's what makes it so realistic.
Thank you so much for making this. I watched this in the theater, but forgot its name. I was haunted by how terrible it is. Finally, having named this film, I can put my trauma behind me...
It’s ok. Take deep breaths. You’re safe here. Visualize all the good Chinese movies, all holding you. You are safe now. The bad movie has gone away.
I don't even watch the film,but I already feel nauseous from watching this review
Cool to see that China can make movies as bad as Hollywood.
Honestly I'd rather watch this than The Flash. Not saying much but still.
@@greenhowieas a guy who watch this movie a month ago, I rather watch flash instead
I think you can also say so in Hong Kong golden cinema era. But somehow HK cinema often has the 'so bad it's good' and stood the test of time.
@@sweetballs4742you made that up lmao😂😂
@@NeostormXLMAX making this up like what? Watching it for free in a website called Kiss Asian?
Why are you assuming that I'm making this up? So you can start an argument here in youtube comment section?
"In a race you need to run to the finish line, not chase after others." Bravo. Perfect way to articulate the issue with trend-chasing.
Switch makes the absurd resurrection of dead characters and enemies joining the good guys in each Fast & Furious movies look very reasonable in comparison
Yui Hatano huh.. I see you are an absolute man of culture..
Yoo, when he say “yui hatano” we know that our friend not only have movie knowledge, he have another “Movie” knowledge too. The real man of culture.
And it’s funny that Yui Hatano became famous outside of Japan because of her resemblance to Lin Chiling. 😂😂😂
I just searched and didn't see the resemblance.
@@Napoleonic_S You need to look for the ones with her clothes on.
@@vangmxYui Hatano is often referred to as the "AV version of Lin Chiling".
I was simply enchanted with this movie getting humiliated left, right and centre. I love the version you got for The Switch was Cantonese dubbed, just makes this analysis even more hilarious!
I took away two things from this video.
1 ) Movie was bad.
2 ) Yui Hatano is good.
Stellar video!
cant confirm #1, can confirm #2
I am honestly impressed at how bad this movie is. It feels like some kind of accomplishment. It deserves some kind of award.
😂 its so bad, i bet it would be hilarious to watch drunk
Hall of Mirrors in Versailles is my favourite running joke. 10/10.
"Ok, Andy, we know that this movie's gonna stink yet we need you to make this movie worth watching. Don't worry, you'll be compensated greatly"
I'm glad in the these last few years Chinese cinema decided to stop copying American big budget action commercial movies and instead chose to adapt Chinese sci-fi novels like The Wandering Earth series into a movie franchise.
I only know of Wandering Earth because of people mocking the horrible science and bad plots of the first movie.
If not Chinese sci-fi novels, the patriotic war films also make bank. For starters, The Battle at Lake Changjin is the second highest grossing film of 2021 only beaten by No Way Home.
I wish Hollywood would stop trying to copy their own big budget action. The whole "cinematic universe" thing needs to die.
@@recoil53 I agree.
Good path to take, more sci fi series should be adapted
Damn. does Andy Lau aged past 35 years old? He should be so damn old now... still looks amazing
maybe in a twist he rips his hot dude face off revealing his old dude face like in the movie
@@idnyftw that would be.... Harrowing 😅
@@idnyftw damn bro that would be peerless
Honestly, I kinda miss the 90's "Cultural art" Chinese movies from Zhang Yimou type of social commentary and cultural change of China type of movies. The last art movie I saw was "Tangshan Earthquake"
Plenty of them are around, for example, 隐入尘烟/Return to Dust from last year as well as the animated feature 深海/Deep Sea from this year and 野马分鬃/Striding Into the Wind from the year before. The difference in genre is much more clear in China now artsy movies generally cater to the artsy audience in China rather than either the mainstream audience or foreign. audience as it was the case in the 1990s. The only recent movie that still did that was 山河故人/Mountains May Depart from 2015. The failure of that movie to find the audience at home and lukewarm reception aboard meant this type of movie would fail both in the box office and as awards baits at foreign festivals. So, cultural change movie take the form of 你好李焕英Hi Mom, ( this genre is more popular in TV shows with coming of age theme like 以家人之名/Go ahead, 你好旧时光My huckleberry friends etc or family through the ages sagas like 人世间/A Lifelong Journey[which btw has a killer theme song mv watch?v=o1tludi1YeU], 温州一家人/Family On The Go, 金婚/Golden Marriage, 一年又一年 or even the Kewang/渴望 the first chinese long form TV series), while social commentary are more like 我不是药神Dying to Survive as well as currently airing movies like 八角笼中/Never Say Never and 孤注一掷/No More Bets, rather than Zhang Yimo type of films.
Hollywood's suffering massively, too. They have yet to figure out that big budget special effects doesn't equate to a good story and too many movies have bombed in the last decade because of current trend being chased, sparsely any original stories.
As cinema audiences dwindled and the MCU grew, fear of originality grew.
Some like to think that capitalists are fearless captains in the sea of fate, but the ones who are already rich are more afraid to loss money by trying something new.
It's also telling that movie story telling has declined at the same time prestige TV has grown. The budgets are smaller, everybody is fighting for a piece of that pie, yet at the same time consumers can also watcher more on TV/streaming.
@@recoil53 "As cinema audiences dwindled and the *MCU* grew, fear of originality grew."
Uh...no, that's been a problem that predated, and existed independent of the MCU. Like even with this year, the two biggest movies that are currently the only big $1 billion hits, both are adaptations of existing properties: one a video game franchise, the other a toy franchise. Neither are in the superhero genre.
@@tastiGMmaster2099 And it's not necessary for either to be in the superhero genre for me to be right. The fact that they were part of existing successful intellectual properties bolsters my point.
I said the fear grew, I never said it didn't exist before.
@@recoil53 my issue is your choice of narrowing on MCU specifically and nothing else, since it’s kind of an issue of film discourse of people picking out the MCU when the issue with Hollywood is far beyond those movies.
(Or at worse, people are using it as an excuse to shit on the MCU)
@@tastiGMmaster2099 You realize it's a UA-cam post and not a dissertation, right?
My first time watching something from this channel. Awesome script. The final parallel between vanity culture and _its tendency to make people compare with eachother_ vs _the movie trying using european standards as a point of comparison_ hit so well it didn't even look like a parallel. Damn
This movie break the one rule of cinema: Making police more competent at job than the leads.😅
Until arround 10 years ago, hack movie critics had the bad habit of saying every movie with frantic editing was "filmed like a videoclip"... but _Switch_ *really looks like a videoclip,* with its gaudy nightclub-looking scenery, its scantaly-clad women as decoration, its vignettes of weird imaginery without purpose interrupting the plot randomly, its tendecy to priorize "showingcwealth" and "being cool" over coherence
Oh my GOD I actually saw some of this movie when it came out (my parents were streaming it). I remember thinking “what the hell this is shit only a 12 year old boy would think is cool,” and that negatively colored my perception of Chinese movies for the longest time. Glad that Chinese filmmakers are finally telling the stories that matter to them!
...inspired by the hall of mirrors in versailles"
LOVE the comeback!!!
To be fair, at least this movie is trying to be (sort of) original. I remember catching some clear HK/Chinese knockoffs of Hollywood blockbusters in the '00s and 90s that were just a collection of stunts and memorable scenes pushed to 11 in ridiculousness without CG or any real plot. This one at least feels like maybe there's a hidden meaning even it that hidden meaning is, "Our investor/producers were all perverts."
This is kinda like a shawn of the dead, or scottpikgrim feel or something like suckerpunch, very how to describe and nonsensical and over the top but entertaining
What a wall of word salad
Your scriptwriting is fantastic as usual. I've had the opportunity to watch more Chinese movies recently so I'll be keeping an eye out.
Another great video! But I'm still trying to forget Yang Zhang's line about washing your eyes with toilet water. Thanks(not) for that visual! 🙂
Excellent essay with an heartwarming ending, I never heard of this movie before but enjoyed this video thoroughly and loads of titles made their way on my endless watchlist. Great channel!
I guess the trilogy should be called " Vanity projects "
I think the car imitation was made for fraud, so we need another one to complete the trilogy
the unholy trinity
I would love to see a full video on modern (last 20ish years) Chinese films you like from across genres. As fun as hearing about the bad is, I found myself more interested in the movies you mentioned at the beginning, and I'm always on the lookout for films to add the my ever growing back log.
The Switch: *exist*
Accented Cinema: Ah sh*t here we go again.
You know, i believe all good cinema seems to have to go through this phase in their respective national industries. Big budget movies are all made by committee by its nature. All taste disappears when the producers hold the reigns of art. But eventually, some filmmakers float to the top earning the trust of the studios or money people and they let them do their thing, and good films are what come out as a result.
But anyway, thank you again for this. I wish it was easier to have access to the movies you feature. People have to watch more "so bad it's good" chinese movies from the 2000s to understand the evolution of the good stuff coming out recently. I argue though that big budget movies still have little to no heart, but the success of things like hey mama, certainly propelled movies with more intimate subject matter to the mainstream movie theaters, widening its audience
Thanks for mentioning The Wandering Earth 2 and DeepSea/ShenHai, would love to see a in depth video about these two great movies in the future.
Yeah, he already did a video for original. Wonder what he will say about its prequel.
You had me at the nurse costume 😂 bravo
LMAO, THE DISCLAIMER IN THE THUMBNAIL🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
All I got from this is that the scifi mockumentary Journey to the West sounds fascinating, and it's a bold move to name it after the most famous story in Chinese mythology. Looking forward to hearing you talk about it!
thank you for talking about Switch 2013. I've always considered this one to be "The Room" of Chinese blockbusters, at some points ever funnier than The Room(in some ways it resembles Batman and Robin more, lol). This really is the best guilty pleasure. I've personally watched this more than 5 times and showed it to some of my friends who rejected it at first but slowly joined me as I laugh at all the weird sht happening on screen.
The popcorn scene, the rollerblade scene, the 5-second Jingdong delivery scene, all of 佟dark为 scenes, all of 斯琴高娃, the ending twist, the horrible American villains, the hilarious mandarin dub, all the random locations. I just can't stop laughing at this monstrocity of a movie. We NEED more awareness for this. 🤣
did I mention the little girl subplot? i can go on and on...
I don't know, I feel like they'll be plenty of bad Chinese blockbusters in the years to come. I don't know any country that stop doing bad movies. We just optimize the numbers of good ones.
A moment of silence for all the innocent ladies and gentlemen who doesn't know who is Yui Hatano
hear hear
Whelp, I know now...
Sorry man, Yakuza Kiwami already featured her
Sara Yurikawa in nurse costume?
Love “A Guilty Conscience (2023). I’m not sure mainland China even got to see it with how the message in the movie was basically criticizing the lack of justice in the courtroom and its government.
It wasn't available in theaters afaik, but it was available on streaming services.
A Guilty Conscience is a Hong Kong movie, which has a different culture from Mainland China, and still British in its their thinking and their justice system, which is based on the British system, not the Mainland system.
I love learning about films I'd probably never get to find out about through this channel. Being from Australia I have no idea who most of these actors or directors are, if any, but I love watching your videos anyway.
When you try to make a blockbuster and end up making a ballbuster
Very honest and bold review, liked listening with the imager.
That opening line made me laugh so hard. Thank you😂
you should review how much of a disaster Aadipurush was. The most revolting movie India ever produced
No
I doubt he has the context to appreciate what Chernobylian parts it has. It's bad for a number of reasons but mainly because it tries to mash two trash genres into one(trashy masala entertainment and repetitive mytho-retelling) both of which has cultural connotations
I didn’t know the word cringe could become one of the greatest understatements of all time. 😂 I love your work!
The contempt in this man's voice is just wonderful.
I had a good laught, still hearing about your passionate but interesting and on the point comments.
Great job, it was very enjoyable. I'm almost curious about this movie, actually!
The cultural underpinnings of vanity culture reflected in this movie really resonate for me, because on online forums I'm part of, a similar phenomenon is happening in my country (the Philippines). I suppose the prevalence of social media and the rise of influencers has a large impact on this, and it was cool to see you showcase how vanity culture reflects in art. Makes me want to watch bad movies from my own country to see what those imply about our current cultural landscape. 😆
"..inspired by the hall of mirrors in Versailles" lmao I lost it 😂😂
i was holding trying not to laugh loudly, but after the fencing fight between the bosses cracked me !!
Haha, I caught that Yui Hatano reference.
They got the Yui Hatano costume right. Good job AC.
13:50 Journey to the West was soooooo good! Saw it on an airplane to china earlier this month.
Your video is really good and sincere
From a writer's perspective, goddammit it could have been a way more interesting story of a cop chasing glory while everyone else gaslights him like corrupt bureaucrats while in fact the higher-ups knew everything's okay because they have the real scroll hidden somewhere else, until it's not because the villains know about the fake scroll misdirection because there's a mole, and everyone gets confused and utterly f*cked because no one knows what's even going on and who to trust.
just imagine The Departed + Atomic Blonde + No Country for Old Men
There is a genre of films in mainland that i love, usually critical and dark. Most of them have in common that they have a private backer, director has full control & they not legal to be shown in mainland, and not interesting enough to be shown outside (west). Usually a film the director can make them his friends (backers) and some film festivals like Berlinale, Venice film festival and so on ...
No idea what the genre is called, maybe "Chinese independent author films"?
Like: "Black Coal, Thin Ice", "11 Flowers", "Buddha Mountain", "The Shaft", "Blind Shaft", "Black Snow" and so on ...
I would love to hear your input on those films :-)
First video from this channel I'm watching ❤
12:16 Oh yes.
I don't see many channels of your type talking about Eurocentrism in East Asia, I already had a conversation with a friend about how the visuals of anime are much more reminiscent of a Western person than an Eastern one.
Your channel is very important.
That depends on the anime. Usually, it's those isekai and fantasy ones that take a lot of inspiration from medieval Europe. Anime in general has a really Asian charm and some Western shows try to replicate that charm, like in the recent Scott Pilgrim anime, Voltron, Avatar: The Last Airbender, etc
I kinda feel that Andy Lau and Tom Cruise are equivelent actors in each of their markets.
3:08 jokes on you, i'm already subscribed
Please do a review with the Deep Sea movie! I swear chinese animation is on another level with the story telling and visuals.
I'm pretty sure you don't take requests but I would really love to hear your perspective on the Jackie Chan John Cena movie Hidden Strike. I couldn't even finish it! It was very incoherent to me, jumping from serious action to comedy to Jackie Chan shedding tears for the strained relationship with his daughter. Your analysis and/or breakdown of it would be a thousand times more entertaining and thought provoking. In any case, always love your videos and film suggestions. Thanks!
Deep Sea is such a beautiful and deep (pun intended) movie.
I hope he will review this.
I'd like to see you do videos on these recent good Chinese movies
Thank you for the Yui Hatano recommendation
You guys have no idea what we went though watching this in a movie theater, speaking as a Chinese
Actually you’re one of the few I watch instead of just listen to. Yr editing & clip choices are feasts for the eye & I come away from a video with 5 more movies on my watch wish list.
Wild that you used the Canto dub(?) for the clips
Run towards the finish line is such a good metaphor 💪🏼💪🏼💯💯💯
I remember the 2010's here in Vancouver. The attitudes and trends shown here were on full display in the Chinese community. It was very image obsessed and people spent like drunken sailors. Watching this brings back memories of how shallow those times were. I mean, it's still like that, but in a less in your face kind of way. No good art can come out of a situation like that, but the bad art that era produced is a just as important an artistic mirror to society.
Great vid! Have you seen that Netflix movie where Jackie Chan teams up with John Cena? It was pretty good
The world need your sense of humour!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 One of the best cultural and cinema channel 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼
0:13 And this is where Zhang's sanity left the freaking window.
Let's be honest for a second. Bad movies aren't just a Chinese problem.
you know YUI HATANO! Made my day!
I might have lasted only 20 minutes into Switch. It is a discovery of many new ways a film is able to insult your intelligence.
dig number 1 was on the thumbnail. I love it.
Hey Accented, Have you watched the latest Chinese mythology adventure film 封神? Want to hear your opinion about it
Still waiting for it one to Canada
Yui Hatano. Truly, a man of culture.
The last one is a legend, I think 劉華 will keep seeing it when he is in his nightmare.
Classy as usual.
Very well analysed
In case anyone else missed it at first, here's his list of great Chinese movies made in the last few years:
The Wandering Earth II
Creation of the Gods I
Deep Sea
Journey to the West (2021)
A Guilty Conscience
Lost Love
No More Bets
Hachiko
Hi, Mom
Leap
Hi, Mom was so good! I'm gonna watch No More Bets coz it seems fun to gamble ahahhahah. Thanks for listing it!
we always have Journey to the west movie every few years
@@ArariaKAgelessTraveller Yeah, you never know what you get if you pick a random one, some have been... less than stellar. So I made sure to date that one.
Super thanks. You saved me time
13:51 Journey to the West is my favorite Chinese movie in the past several years as well, so happy to see it
"Desperately trying to convince the world you are a winner, not a weiner" is my new favorite quote
''Yui Hatano'' I see you are a man of culture as well
8:09 AAAAAH! HE SAID THE THING!
God, I love this channel!
Honestly this is like the typical 2000s schlock that i used to watch every night, subbed or dubbed.
this is truly ascended cinema
What a time for a MUBI sponsorship :V
Thank you for your sacrifice.
This gonna be good
That final fencing battle HAS to be inspired by Hot Shots 😂😂😂
Is Journey to the West (2021) now available on streaming?? Been wanting to watch it for a while
Seriously. At the past 5 years, many Asian movies stepped up and got even better than hollywood flicks. Not only chinese: Korean, Japanese, India, even my home country Indonesia. And I genuinely think it's because Asian filmmakers finally found the way to assimilate the western movie technique and knowledge with the rich culture of Asia.
Asian movies are now more than just kungfu/ninja/samurai flicks. It's anthropologically and sociologically represented like how it should be: how we think, how we interact, how we live our life.
It's beautiful.